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1
00:00:05,221 --> 00:00:07,380
[intro music]
2
00:00:07,460 --> 00:00:12,061
[imitates train] Tickets this way
for the Chatsworth Express!
3
00:00:12,141 --> 00:00:16,341
Come and watch pikeys
making a mess of the lives
4
00:00:16,421 --> 00:00:19,541
they were given by him upstairs.
5
00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:23,021
And kids they're convinced
aren't actually theirs.
6
00:00:23,101 --> 00:00:24,061
[shouts] Stay away!
7
00:00:24,140 --> 00:00:30,741
What sounds on earth could ever replace
kids needing money or wives in your face?
8
00:00:30,820 --> 00:00:33,900
Cos this, people reckon, and me included,
9
00:00:33,981 --> 00:00:38,301
is why pubs and drugs
were kindly invented,
10
00:00:38,381 --> 00:00:42,021
to calm us all down
and stop us going mental.
11
00:00:42,101 --> 00:00:46,501
These are Chatsworth Estate's
basic essentials.
12
00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:50,821
We are worth every penny
for grinding your axes.
13
00:00:50,900 --> 00:00:55,501
You shit on our heads,
but you pay the taxes.
14
00:00:55,580 --> 00:00:58,501
[all laughing]
15
00:00:58,580 --> 00:01:01,501
Imagine a Britain
without Chatsworth buccaneers
16
00:01:01,580 --> 00:01:04,381
who'd come on your face
for the price of a beer.
17
00:01:04,461 --> 00:01:07,821
Make poverty history, cheaper drugs now!
18
00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:12,101
Make poverty history, cheaper drugs now!
19
00:01:12,181 --> 00:01:13,861
[laughing]
20
00:01:13,941 --> 00:01:15,381
Scatter!
21
00:01:15,461 --> 00:01:16,741
Party!
22
00:01:20,181 --> 00:01:22,581
[music fades out]
23
00:01:24,221 --> 00:01:25,261
So...
24
00:01:26,381 --> 00:01:27,901
Maxine, then...
25
00:01:27,981 --> 00:01:30,661
[Micky]
See, here's the problem with society.
26
00:01:30,741 --> 00:01:32,341
We've got too much choice.
27
00:01:32,420 --> 00:01:33,261
[both panting]
28
00:01:33,341 --> 00:01:35,381
[Micky] Every decade that rolls past,
29
00:01:35,461 --> 00:01:38,101
we get more and more lifestyle options.
30
00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:39,381
[Carl] You fuckin'...
31
00:01:39,461 --> 00:01:40,780
[Carl gasping in rage]
32
00:01:40,860 --> 00:01:44,140
[Micky] And the one thing
you can guarantee about people,
33
00:01:44,220 --> 00:01:47,381
give 'em a choice
and they'll pick the wrong fuckin' one.
34
00:01:50,060 --> 00:01:52,140
And then it's too late.
35
00:01:52,220 --> 00:01:55,700
Can't rewind, can't go back,
you've made your choice,
36
00:01:55,780 --> 00:01:57,060
-and you...
-[door slams]
37
00:01:57,140 --> 00:02:00,021
and everyone else
has got to live with it.
38
00:02:05,981 --> 00:02:07,261
ASAP.
39
00:02:11,260 --> 00:02:14,260
Was happy to feed Stella.
Make sure bills were paid.
40
00:02:14,341 --> 00:02:16,741
Stop Dad from choking on his own vomit.
41
00:02:16,820 --> 00:02:19,980
[Frank] Wasn't choking
so much as a terrified gargle.
42
00:02:20,061 --> 00:02:22,781
But you just broke the camel's back.
43
00:02:22,861 --> 00:02:24,061
Camel?
44
00:02:28,260 --> 00:02:29,540
[Frank] Hey!
45
00:02:29,621 --> 00:02:30,581
Brekky!
46
00:02:32,901 --> 00:02:34,741
Just take, take, take, with you, innit?
47
00:02:34,820 --> 00:02:37,540
Should've got that tidy little thing
you hang around with
48
00:02:37,621 --> 00:02:39,741
to sew it for you,
instead of pissing Liam off.
49
00:02:39,820 --> 00:02:41,621
-That's her job, see?
-Maxine?
50
00:02:41,701 --> 00:02:43,621
-Yeah.
-We broke up, remember?
51
00:02:43,700 --> 00:02:45,980
Give you the sharp end
of the elbow, did she?
52
00:02:46,061 --> 00:02:47,260
No. I dumped her.
53
00:02:47,341 --> 00:02:50,221
-[Frank making a trumpet sound]
-[Carl] Seriously. I did.
54
00:02:51,100 --> 00:02:54,260
-It was me. All me.
-[Frank] She's out of your league, mate.
55
00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:58,141
You're supposed to hold onto those ones,
not chuck 'em away.
56
00:03:00,061 --> 00:03:01,861
It just... didn't feel right.
57
00:03:02,980 --> 00:03:05,141
[Frank] Good in the sack, made you laugh,
58
00:03:05,980 --> 00:03:07,061
bit of a brain on her,
59
00:03:07,141 --> 00:03:09,741
cracking tits
you could stare at for hours?
60
00:03:09,820 --> 00:03:10,700
Well, yeah.
61
00:03:10,781 --> 00:03:13,181
So what the fuck didn't feel right?
62
00:03:16,100 --> 00:03:19,221
Well, while you're ruminating
on your failings as a human being,
63
00:03:19,301 --> 00:03:21,141
two eggs, sunny side up.
64
00:03:26,781 --> 00:03:27,980
So, you'll do it, then.
65
00:03:28,061 --> 00:03:30,661
[sighs] I dunno. It's weird.
66
00:03:30,741 --> 00:03:32,741
Ah. Statement, not a question.
67
00:03:32,820 --> 00:03:35,941
Cos I've already told my mum and dad
that I'm bringing my boyfriend
68
00:03:36,021 --> 00:03:37,540
to their anniversary party.
69
00:03:37,621 --> 00:03:39,501
-Great.
-[Maxine] Oh, and you're a doctor.
70
00:03:39,581 --> 00:03:41,661
-What?
-Congratulations.
71
00:03:41,741 --> 00:03:43,021
But I'm not a doctor.
72
00:03:43,100 --> 00:03:47,021
And even if I was, I'd be a gay doctor,
so that's even less use for you.
73
00:03:47,100 --> 00:03:49,221
You're the only half-decent man I know.
74
00:03:49,301 --> 00:03:52,781
So show up, slap a smile
on your face and pretend you like me.
75
00:03:52,861 --> 00:03:55,061
Why you so bothered about impressing
your parents, anyway?
76
00:03:55,140 --> 00:03:56,941
Because they think I'm a fuck-up.
77
00:03:57,540 --> 00:03:59,021
And I am a fuck-up.
78
00:03:59,100 --> 00:04:01,781
But I don't want to provide them
with any more ammunition.
79
00:04:03,301 --> 00:04:04,260
[Ian sighs]
80
00:04:06,140 --> 00:04:08,140
Tell you what, that black goes in...
81
00:04:09,820 --> 00:04:11,140
and you're on.
82
00:04:12,341 --> 00:04:15,420
-[Maxine laughs]
-[Ian laughs]
83
00:04:16,740 --> 00:04:18,261
[Ian] You all right, mate?
84
00:04:22,500 --> 00:04:23,541
[Maxine clears throat]
85
00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:29,620
Look, I don't want to sound like a tit,
but your angle's all wrong.
86
00:04:36,581 --> 00:04:37,821
Go on, then.
87
00:04:50,740 --> 00:04:53,141
-That was actually pretty good.
-Nothing.
88
00:05:01,620 --> 00:05:02,500
[Maxine chuckles]
89
00:05:03,781 --> 00:05:05,301
What, that doesn't count!
90
00:05:05,381 --> 00:05:08,740
You said the black had to go in.
You didn't say who by.
91
00:05:08,821 --> 00:05:10,740
[Maxine] Wear something straight.
92
00:05:12,381 --> 00:05:16,301
[sweet romantic music]
93
00:05:24,301 --> 00:05:25,940
[Lillian] Got any Tom Bakers?
94
00:05:26,021 --> 00:05:27,060
-What?
-Scarves.
95
00:05:27,141 --> 00:05:28,500
You know, like Tom Baker wore.
96
00:05:29,141 --> 00:05:30,101
Ladies' wear...
97
00:05:30,781 --> 00:05:31,620
third floor.
98
00:05:32,421 --> 00:05:34,421
-Eh?
-It's the lowest form of wit, love.
99
00:05:35,301 --> 00:05:36,421
Never mind.
100
00:05:37,541 --> 00:05:40,500
Going to look like a real twat
if I turn up without one.
101
00:05:40,581 --> 00:05:43,541
Bournemouth, three days.
Doctor Who convention.
102
00:05:43,620 --> 00:05:46,141
There's going to be a real
live Cyberman there.
103
00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:48,620
-And I fucking love Cybermen.
-4.50.
104
00:05:49,261 --> 00:05:51,740
Hear that Karen Maguire's coming out
of prison today.
105
00:05:51,821 --> 00:05:53,701
-You sure?
-Yeah.
106
00:05:53,781 --> 00:05:56,821
-And it was hospital, not prison.
-No. Mimi definitely said prison.
107
00:05:59,341 --> 00:06:00,821
Ta. See ya.
108
00:06:01,620 --> 00:06:03,541
Yeah, live long and prosper.
109
00:06:20,940 --> 00:06:23,820
-[Jamie] Are you okay?
-[Karen] I've stayed in worse places.
110
00:06:25,820 --> 00:06:26,901
It's all right.
111
00:06:27,701 --> 00:06:29,820
You can give me a hug,
I'm not going to break.
112
00:06:47,820 --> 00:06:48,740
[door opens]
113
00:06:49,541 --> 00:06:50,461
[door slams]
114
00:06:53,740 --> 00:06:54,901
Bit quiet in here, innit?
115
00:06:56,101 --> 00:06:58,940
People aren't willing to slap down cash
for a quickie any more.
116
00:06:59,781 --> 00:07:02,141
Everyone just stays home and wanks.
117
00:07:02,221 --> 00:07:06,221
I thought when Lillian left me in charge,
it'd be a chance to do things my way.
118
00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:09,221
But you can't have a knocking shop
if nobody's knocking.
119
00:07:09,301 --> 00:07:10,341
[knocking at the door]
120
00:07:17,940 --> 00:07:20,380
-Erm...
-Piss off, son.
121
00:07:20,461 --> 00:07:23,541
-Come back when you're older.
-Whoa, whoa. Don't you fucking move.
122
00:07:23,620 --> 00:07:25,101
How old are ya?
123
00:07:25,180 --> 00:07:26,021
16.
124
00:07:27,021 --> 00:07:27,940
You got ID?
125
00:07:34,380 --> 00:07:36,421
-Technically, he's legal.
-[Kelly] Yeah,
126
00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:38,221
but if he gets his rocks off in 'ere,
127
00:07:38,301 --> 00:07:41,661
then every bloody kid for miles
is going to be coming through that door.
128
00:07:43,781 --> 00:07:45,301
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
129
00:07:45,380 --> 00:07:46,221
Park your arse.
130
00:07:52,661 --> 00:07:54,541
[intriguing music]
131
00:07:57,180 --> 00:07:59,301
"She's young," I said.
"They make mistakes."
132
00:07:59,380 --> 00:08:02,021
That's what youth is all about.
She'll learn.
133
00:08:02,101 --> 00:08:05,301
Main thing, she did her time
like a good girl.
134
00:08:05,380 --> 00:08:06,500
Makes me feel proud.
135
00:08:06,581 --> 00:08:09,661
-She's not half like me.
-[Karen slams glasses on the counter]
136
00:08:09,740 --> 00:08:10,981
[Karen] I wasn't in jail.
137
00:08:11,820 --> 00:08:14,740
-Best not talk about this now, eh, Karen?
-I was in hospital.
138
00:08:14,820 --> 00:08:16,221
[Karen] A psychiatric hospital.
139
00:08:16,301 --> 00:08:18,021
Insanity plea. Works a charm.
140
00:08:18,101 --> 00:08:20,060
[Karen]
I've been diagnosed wi' being bipolar.
141
00:08:20,141 --> 00:08:22,861
It's an affective disorder
in which the individual alternates
142
00:08:22,940 --> 00:08:25,461
between states of deep depression
and extreme elation.
143
00:08:25,541 --> 00:08:29,901
And it is nothing to be ashamed of,
despite what some people might think.
144
00:08:35,501 --> 00:08:37,901
You'll ruin the good name of this family.
145
00:08:37,980 --> 00:08:40,261
Have you actually looked
at the family recently?
146
00:08:40,340 --> 00:08:42,661
Because if you really think
the Maguires have got a good name,
147
00:08:42,741 --> 00:08:45,340
maybe it's you
that needs to stay in a nuthouse.
148
00:08:51,021 --> 00:08:52,621
[Ian] Cereal for dinner?
149
00:08:52,701 --> 00:08:54,821
Yeah, for any time of the day.
150
00:08:55,421 --> 00:08:56,460
Not breaking any laws.
151
00:08:59,340 --> 00:09:00,581
Going out?
152
00:09:00,661 --> 00:09:02,861
Yeah. Maxine's folks are having a party.
153
00:09:02,941 --> 00:09:05,621
Well, a bit of warning
would have been nice.
154
00:09:05,701 --> 00:09:08,661
-I've not even had a shower or anything.
-It's a private party.
155
00:09:08,741 --> 00:09:10,501
-Oh.
-[Ian] It's not going to be fun.
156
00:09:10,581 --> 00:09:12,460
I've got to pretend to be
her doctor boyfriend.
157
00:09:12,541 --> 00:09:13,460
Boyfriend?
158
00:09:13,541 --> 00:09:15,421
But she does know that you're a...
159
00:09:16,220 --> 00:09:18,421
-Some kind of bird?
-Shit-stabber.
160
00:09:18,501 --> 00:09:19,381
Of course she does. You know that.
161
00:09:19,460 --> 00:09:21,460
-Ta-da!
-You scrub up okay.
162
00:09:22,181 --> 00:09:23,781
-So do you.
-Yeah, for a poof!
163
00:09:24,980 --> 00:09:26,741
Well, I'm dead busy tonight, me.
164
00:09:27,460 --> 00:09:29,181
Oh, I've got loads of things to do.
165
00:09:29,261 --> 00:09:31,181
[Micky turns TV on]
166
00:09:40,421 --> 00:09:43,381
-Should we hold hands or something?
-I don't know. If you want.
167
00:09:45,621 --> 00:09:46,541
Hello?
168
00:09:46,621 --> 00:09:48,581
-Is this not a bit over the top?
-Shut up.
169
00:09:52,340 --> 00:09:54,701
-Hi, Mum.
-Hiya, love. Aw.
170
00:09:55,381 --> 00:09:56,661
[Maxine] Dad,
171
00:09:56,741 --> 00:09:58,100
this is, er, my boyfriend.
172
00:09:58,181 --> 00:09:59,340
Hi.
173
00:09:59,421 --> 00:10:00,460
Dr Gallagher.
174
00:10:00,541 --> 00:10:03,581
Doctor? Oh! Can't be bad.
175
00:10:04,501 --> 00:10:05,421
[Cameron] Come in.
176
00:10:08,581 --> 00:10:11,421
-[karaoke music]
-[guy singing "Love Will Tear us Apart"]
177
00:10:11,501 --> 00:10:13,901
So, how come
you ended up with our Max, then?
178
00:10:13,980 --> 00:10:15,541
We met at, um...
179
00:10:16,781 --> 00:10:18,301
a social function.
180
00:10:19,061 --> 00:10:21,181
It must be a bit frustrating, though?
181
00:10:21,261 --> 00:10:22,541
Well, no, not really.
182
00:10:22,621 --> 00:10:24,301
[Cameron] You've obviously gone out
183
00:10:24,381 --> 00:10:27,621
and made something of yourself
and now you've been lumbered with her.
184
00:10:27,701 --> 00:10:29,261
Take her brother, Bruce.
185
00:10:29,340 --> 00:10:33,021
He's directionless, yeah,
but he's got drive. He's got gumption.
186
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:34,141
I've got drive.
187
00:10:34,220 --> 00:10:36,220
[Cameron] Of course you have, sweetheart.
Don't be so sensitive.
188
00:10:36,301 --> 00:10:37,781
She's just like her mother.
189
00:10:37,860 --> 00:10:40,301
You help yourself to beer, won't you, Ian?
190
00:10:40,381 --> 00:10:42,501
Don't. I'm fine.
191
00:10:42,581 --> 00:10:45,220
Cool fucking beans. On toast.
192
00:10:45,301 --> 00:10:47,701
Let's just get through this party
without fucking up.
193
00:10:48,421 --> 00:10:50,581
[Bruce singing "Love Will Tear us Apart"]
194
00:10:50,661 --> 00:10:53,860
Apparently, the sexual peak
for a woman is in her 30s.
195
00:10:53,941 --> 00:10:56,581
-That's, like, 60 in dog years--
-[Ian] Micky!
196
00:10:57,220 --> 00:10:59,460
-[Ian] What you doing?
-Making conversation--
197
00:10:59,541 --> 00:11:02,421
-No, what the fuck are you doing here?
-I'm looking out for you.
198
00:11:03,021 --> 00:11:05,100
Watching that Maxine. She fancies you.
199
00:11:05,181 --> 00:11:07,141
-[Ian] Don't talk shite.
-It'll get messy.
200
00:11:07,220 --> 00:11:08,460
Stop trying to run my life.
201
00:11:09,621 --> 00:11:12,541
Stay here, don't touch anything,
don't talk to anyone.
202
00:11:12,621 --> 00:11:14,621
Maxine won't mind. Carl's here too.
203
00:11:19,181 --> 00:11:21,061
-You shouldn't be here.
-It's a party.
204
00:11:21,141 --> 00:11:23,181
It's not that sort of party.
You can't stay.
205
00:11:23,261 --> 00:11:25,021
I'm sure your boyfriend won't mind.
206
00:11:25,100 --> 00:11:27,340
-[Ian] Could have asked me, though.
-[Bruce] Thank you.
207
00:11:27,421 --> 00:11:28,621
Have a bit of fun!
208
00:11:28,701 --> 00:11:31,261
[Cameron] Hey, Doc, are you going
to have a go at that karaoke?
209
00:11:32,460 --> 00:11:33,340
Watch out for our Max.
210
00:11:33,421 --> 00:11:35,901
She sounds like a pig being punched
when she starts belting them out.
211
00:11:35,980 --> 00:11:38,261
-Cut it out.
-Cut what out?
212
00:11:38,340 --> 00:11:41,501
You're making Max feel bad.
I know you probably don't mean to.
213
00:11:41,581 --> 00:11:45,661
[Ian] I don't want to cause an argument,
but you need to ease up on her.
214
00:11:45,740 --> 00:11:48,381
Give her a smile
or a thumbs-up or something.
215
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:53,460
[upbeat lounge music playing]
216
00:11:56,021 --> 00:11:57,421
[Carl] What are we singing?
217
00:11:58,740 --> 00:11:59,781
"I Got You Babe".
218
00:12:11,181 --> 00:12:12,181
[man] Oh, my god.
219
00:12:15,661 --> 00:12:18,301
[chatter in background]
220
00:12:19,261 --> 00:12:21,100
You've got to go home some time, kiddo.
221
00:12:21,181 --> 00:12:24,621
No. Not until they stop treating
me like a slave.
222
00:12:24,701 --> 00:12:27,141
-Unless I'm getting in the way.
-Course you're not.
223
00:12:29,061 --> 00:12:32,460
Right. Number 64, you're up.
224
00:12:32,541 --> 00:12:33,901
[lads laughing]
225
00:12:33,980 --> 00:12:34,980
[Kelly] Thank you.
226
00:12:36,021 --> 00:12:38,261
Calm down. Deep breaths.
227
00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,701
[both inhale deeply]
228
00:12:39,781 --> 00:12:41,661
[both exhale]
229
00:12:41,740 --> 00:12:42,901
Have fun.
230
00:12:45,021 --> 00:12:48,141
After-school specials? You're a genius.
231
00:12:48,220 --> 00:12:51,061
Shame it's out of my pocket,
straight into Lillian's.
232
00:12:51,141 --> 00:12:53,501
No, you just need a bit
of creative accounting, that's all.
233
00:12:53,581 --> 00:12:55,421
Nah. I couldn't do that.
234
00:12:56,901 --> 00:13:00,100
-Hi!
-[lad] I've counted it, twice.
235
00:13:00,181 --> 00:13:01,821
There's your ticket, take a seat.
236
00:13:01,901 --> 00:13:03,220
[lad] Cheers.
237
00:13:03,301 --> 00:13:04,901
[mischievous music]
238
00:13:04,980 --> 00:13:05,821
Then again...
239
00:13:07,941 --> 00:13:10,061
What she doesn't know, right?
240
00:13:26,541 --> 00:13:27,821
[Jamie moans]
241
00:13:35,740 --> 00:13:36,740
[Karen] Jamie,
242
00:13:36,821 --> 00:13:40,581
it's like a thousand insects
scrabbling away.
243
00:13:41,541 --> 00:13:43,620
[Jamie gasps in discomfort]
244
00:13:43,701 --> 00:13:45,901
[Karen pants]
245
00:13:47,340 --> 00:13:48,581
[Karen's voice] Jamie,
246
00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:50,460
why won't it stop?
247
00:13:50,541 --> 00:13:52,980
Jamie, why won't it stop?
248
00:13:53,061 --> 00:13:55,620
[Karen's voice screaming] Stop! Stop!
249
00:13:55,701 --> 00:13:58,581
-[Karen breaths quickly]
-[Jamie sighs] Sorry.
250
00:13:58,661 --> 00:14:00,701
It's just...
251
00:14:00,781 --> 00:14:01,941
Oh, sorry.
252
00:14:02,021 --> 00:14:03,460
-[Jamie sighs]
-It's okay.
253
00:14:03,541 --> 00:14:04,901
I understand.
254
00:14:04,980 --> 00:14:06,980
[Jamie] It's not you, Karen. It's just...
255
00:14:07,061 --> 00:14:08,381
I'm tired, babes.
256
00:14:09,421 --> 00:14:11,141
-It's all right.
-[Jamie sighs]
257
00:14:12,301 --> 00:14:13,781
[tense music]
258
00:14:15,021 --> 00:14:17,581
["Children" playing]
259
00:14:19,581 --> 00:14:20,941
[lads chattering]
260
00:14:21,021 --> 00:14:23,860
-So, you really like our Max, eh?
-Yeah, she's great.
261
00:14:29,740 --> 00:14:30,620
You're a shit liar.
262
00:14:30,701 --> 00:14:32,301
[Bruce blows out smoke]
263
00:14:33,941 --> 00:14:35,220
Little gay boy.
264
00:14:40,860 --> 00:14:42,261
Cut it out, Bruce.
265
00:14:42,340 --> 00:14:44,980
It's ok. He knows.
I tell my little brother everything.
266
00:14:45,061 --> 00:14:46,100
[Ian] Fuck's sake.
267
00:14:46,181 --> 00:14:48,141
I thought you were going to punch me then.
268
00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:49,901
Yeah. With his penis.
269
00:14:49,980 --> 00:14:52,821
-[Ian] You're kidding. Are you--
-One of the gays? Yep.
270
00:14:52,901 --> 00:14:54,860
-For me sins.
-I'm one of them lot too.
271
00:14:54,941 --> 00:14:58,220
Max, you got any friends who don't park
their car up Chocolate Lane?
272
00:14:58,301 --> 00:14:59,581
I don't.
273
00:14:59,661 --> 00:15:01,021
Yeah, that's a shame.
274
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,941
Right, well,
you boys can all crash in here,
275
00:15:04,021 --> 00:15:06,781
but don't expect
any Caligula-style orgies.
276
00:15:06,860 --> 00:15:08,460
Smoking dope's one thing,
277
00:15:08,541 --> 00:15:10,661
but I don't think
Pops would be too pleased
278
00:15:10,740 --> 00:15:13,261
if he found us all
with us dicks hanging out.
279
00:15:13,340 --> 00:15:15,620
[Bruce]
And cheers for sticking up for my sis.
280
00:15:15,701 --> 00:15:17,340
If you were shafting her,
281
00:15:17,421 --> 00:15:19,421
I'd definitely give you
my seal of approval.
282
00:15:20,781 --> 00:15:22,620
I'll get some pillows and stuff, then.
283
00:15:25,301 --> 00:15:26,740
I was thinking...
284
00:15:27,421 --> 00:15:28,740
I could stay in your room.
285
00:15:28,821 --> 00:15:31,301
I mean, give the lads
a bit of space and all that.
286
00:15:31,381 --> 00:15:32,541
Yeah, it's just...
287
00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:35,021
Ian's my fake boyfriend, so...
288
00:15:35,781 --> 00:15:38,220
[Maxine] My dad, you know. Might be weird.
289
00:15:38,301 --> 00:15:39,301
Yeah, good point.
290
00:15:39,901 --> 00:15:41,100
[Carl] Er, your singing...
291
00:15:42,061 --> 00:15:44,181
it were dead good. Like proper singing.
292
00:15:45,821 --> 00:15:46,860
Oh, cheers.
293
00:15:54,701 --> 00:15:56,061
[suspenseful music]
294
00:16:00,421 --> 00:16:02,301
-What--
-[Maxine shushes]
295
00:16:14,061 --> 00:16:15,220
[Ian sighs]
296
00:16:16,980 --> 00:16:20,821
[Micky's voice] I'm looking out for you.
Watching that Maxine. She fancies you.
297
00:16:36,141 --> 00:16:37,901
[radio playing]
298
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:39,380
[plates clattering]
299
00:16:40,581 --> 00:16:41,460
[water pouring]
300
00:16:42,740 --> 00:16:44,980
Cheers for last night. I do appreciate it.
301
00:16:46,220 --> 00:16:47,181
-That's my mug.
-What?
302
00:16:47,261 --> 00:16:48,460
[Ian] It says "Ian" on it.
303
00:16:48,541 --> 00:16:50,860
Ian. That's me.
So, respect that, thank you.
304
00:16:51,941 --> 00:16:52,860
[plates clattering]
305
00:16:55,181 --> 00:16:56,661
[spoon tinkling]
306
00:16:58,061 --> 00:16:59,541
What's his problem?
307
00:17:00,500 --> 00:17:01,740
You've put the wind up him.
308
00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:04,140
-[Maxine] Sorry?
-He knows.
309
00:17:04,781 --> 00:17:07,380
-[Maxine] Knows what?
-That you fancy him.
310
00:17:08,461 --> 00:17:09,301
I don't.
311
00:17:09,380 --> 00:17:11,501
Whatever you think
is going to happen, it's not.
312
00:17:11,581 --> 00:17:12,501
[Micky] Right?
313
00:17:13,261 --> 00:17:14,821
I'm sorry, but it's not.
314
00:17:14,900 --> 00:17:17,261
You need a fucking hobby, sunshine.
315
00:17:17,340 --> 00:17:18,860
Too much time on your hands.
316
00:17:22,221 --> 00:17:25,100
[tense music]
317
00:17:38,221 --> 00:17:39,701
[Karen] Friendly warning letter.
318
00:17:40,900 --> 00:17:43,061
Official warning letter.
319
00:17:44,261 --> 00:17:47,261
Red no-more-fucking-warning letters.
320
00:17:47,341 --> 00:17:48,861
Easy, Karen, easy.
321
00:17:49,581 --> 00:17:51,021
Come on, calm down.
322
00:17:51,981 --> 00:17:54,420
You think I'm doing this
cos of my condition?
323
00:17:54,501 --> 00:17:55,660
Crazy fucking Karen?
324
00:17:56,781 --> 00:17:58,981
We are one bill away
from being out on our arses.
325
00:17:59,061 --> 00:18:00,581
Hey, it's all under control.
326
00:18:01,660 --> 00:18:03,021
I'm dealing with these.
327
00:18:03,940 --> 00:18:05,621
You've got nothing to worry about.
328
00:18:06,660 --> 00:18:09,101
-You promise me?
-Yeah.
329
00:18:09,180 --> 00:18:10,141
Of course.
330
00:18:31,301 --> 00:18:32,221
[door lock opens]
331
00:18:33,101 --> 00:18:34,461
[Micky] Voila!
332
00:18:35,341 --> 00:18:37,700
Tidy bit of artwork
by yours fucking truly.
333
00:18:38,821 --> 00:18:40,101
[Ian sighs]
334
00:18:42,741 --> 00:18:44,861
[suspenseful music]
335
00:18:44,940 --> 00:18:46,700
[Micky] Oi! What the fuck?
336
00:18:47,341 --> 00:18:48,940
[moaning]
337
00:18:49,021 --> 00:18:51,461
[pool balls clattering]
338
00:18:52,420 --> 00:18:55,461
[fast-paced electronic music]
339
00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:00,061
You all right?
340
00:19:01,501 --> 00:19:03,821
Don't speak, all right? Don't say a word.
341
00:19:03,900 --> 00:19:04,821
[door lock closes]
342
00:19:07,741 --> 00:19:10,301
[both panting]
343
00:19:10,381 --> 00:19:13,781
[both breathing heavily]
344
00:19:15,581 --> 00:19:17,021
[Micky] Ah, yeah.
345
00:19:17,660 --> 00:19:18,700
[Maxine moans]
346
00:19:19,301 --> 00:19:22,141
[Micky moans and pants]
347
00:19:22,221 --> 00:19:24,141
[both panting]
348
00:19:24,221 --> 00:19:25,821
[Micky's voice] Watching that Maxine.
349
00:19:25,900 --> 00:19:28,301
[Micky's voice] Because whatever
you think is going to happen, it's not.
350
00:19:28,381 --> 00:19:29,621
[Micky's voice] She fancies ya.
351
00:19:29,700 --> 00:19:31,700
[Micky's voice]
He knows that you fancy him.
352
00:19:37,981 --> 00:19:39,821
I've got to run.
353
00:19:39,900 --> 00:19:42,221
-Right, well, I'll see you later, yeah?
-Yeah.
354
00:19:46,900 --> 00:19:49,660
[fast-paced music]
355
00:19:49,741 --> 00:19:51,660
[Micky moans]
356
00:19:53,301 --> 00:19:55,381
-Have you seen the scissors?
-[Micky moans]
357
00:19:55,461 --> 00:19:56,821
[Micky moans]
358
00:20:01,541 --> 00:20:04,341
[Ian breathes heavily]
359
00:20:08,861 --> 00:20:10,821
-[Micky] Give us a kiss.
-Fuck off, Micky.
360
00:20:14,180 --> 00:20:16,221
[Micky breathes quickly]
361
00:20:19,581 --> 00:20:23,101
[disco pop music playing]
362
00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:24,781
[Carl] It's back on.
363
00:20:24,861 --> 00:20:27,301
It's so back on.
You should have seen her, all over me.
364
00:20:27,381 --> 00:20:30,700
[Jamie] All right, we get it, mate.
You're great, you're fucking amazing.
365
00:20:32,981 --> 00:20:35,341
-[Carl] Right, I'm off.
-[Chesney] You're joking?
366
00:20:35,420 --> 00:20:38,501
You can't go home.
Are you not seeing what I'm seeing?
367
00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:44,741
-They're all right, I suppose.
-All right? It's girls in school uniform.
368
00:20:44,821 --> 00:20:47,061
There's no way
we are not going home without them.
369
00:20:53,141 --> 00:20:54,900
No, I can't. It wouldn't be right.
370
00:20:54,981 --> 00:20:56,621
No, it really would be.
371
00:20:57,341 --> 00:21:02,700
[Carl] There's two of them and one of you,
and they're all gagging for it.
372
00:21:02,781 --> 00:21:05,581
So stop being a tit, and get over there.
373
00:21:06,621 --> 00:21:07,861
Happy birthday!
374
00:21:07,940 --> 00:21:09,741
See you later, mate. Take care.
375
00:21:14,381 --> 00:21:16,781
Ladies' toilets. Two minutes.
376
00:21:16,861 --> 00:21:18,861
-[Jamie] You what?
-You heard.
377
00:21:28,180 --> 00:21:29,021
Do I know you?
378
00:21:29,981 --> 00:21:31,501
-No.
-So what's this about, then?
379
00:21:32,101 --> 00:21:34,821
Well, I just wanted to see
what sort of person you are.
380
00:21:34,900 --> 00:21:37,420
Like, are you the sort of man
who walks into the ladies
381
00:21:37,501 --> 00:21:39,461
just because a stranger told him to?
382
00:21:41,180 --> 00:21:42,021
And?
383
00:21:46,180 --> 00:21:48,700
[upbeat music]
384
00:21:49,301 --> 00:21:50,981
-[Jamie pants]
-[woman laughs]
385
00:21:54,261 --> 00:21:57,021
-[woman moans loudly]
-[Jamie pants]
386
00:21:57,101 --> 00:21:58,940
[both moaning]
387
00:21:59,581 --> 00:22:01,981
-[woman screams]
-[Jamie breaths heavily]
388
00:22:03,101 --> 00:22:04,660
[puffs loudly]
389
00:22:07,900 --> 00:22:11,700
[enigmatic upbeat music]
390
00:22:13,741 --> 00:22:15,541
I was going to knock this time, honest.
391
00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:20,581
Oh, come on! It was sort of funny.
392
00:22:23,501 --> 00:22:25,700
[Maxine] Have you been eating
twat sandwiches today or summat?
393
00:22:25,781 --> 00:22:27,460
Cos either I've done something wrong
394
00:22:27,541 --> 00:22:29,700
or you've turned
into a total fanny overnight.
395
00:22:32,460 --> 00:22:34,101
Micky thinks you fancy me.
396
00:22:34,180 --> 00:22:37,101
And he keeps going on about it.
It's messing with my head a bit.
397
00:22:38,381 --> 00:22:39,660
Sorry.
398
00:22:39,741 --> 00:22:41,341
[TV in background]
399
00:22:42,180 --> 00:22:44,180
I don't think
you need to worry about that.
400
00:22:45,940 --> 00:22:48,460
Even if I did, it'd be pointless.
401
00:22:51,381 --> 00:22:53,101
So don't flatter yourself.
402
00:22:56,900 --> 00:22:58,741
[Ian] It's not just that.
403
00:22:58,821 --> 00:23:01,981
It's... I don't know.
404
00:23:04,940 --> 00:23:06,981
What are you doing?
405
00:23:07,061 --> 00:23:09,261
-I don't know.
-Don't do that.
406
00:23:09,341 --> 00:23:11,781
-Don't!
-Sorry.
407
00:23:11,861 --> 00:23:15,501
I know you're just trying to be nice,
but I fucking hate nice.
408
00:23:15,581 --> 00:23:18,261
-And I don't need your sympathy.
-It's not sympathy.
409
00:23:18,341 --> 00:23:21,420
Ian, a few hours ago,
you had your dick in Micky.
410
00:23:21,501 --> 00:23:25,101
-So let's not pretend otherwise, eh?
-I did it because I thought it'd help.
411
00:23:26,341 --> 00:23:28,541
You don't have to justify it.
412
00:23:29,900 --> 00:23:33,700
[Maxine] That's what you do.
Who you are.
413
00:23:37,141 --> 00:23:38,821
Sorry.
414
00:23:38,900 --> 00:23:40,781
-[Ian] All right?
-Piss off.
415
00:23:40,861 --> 00:23:41,741
[Ian chuckles]
416
00:23:44,741 --> 00:23:46,781
-[remote beeping]
-[TV playing]
417
00:23:53,981 --> 00:23:55,261
Stop, alright?
418
00:23:56,981 --> 00:23:58,541
[romantic music]
419
00:23:59,341 --> 00:24:00,420
[Maxine] Stop.
420
00:24:09,660 --> 00:24:12,541
[Ian and Maxine moaning loudly]
421
00:24:16,381 --> 00:24:18,261
[tense music]
422
00:24:18,981 --> 00:24:20,861
[Maxine moans]
423
00:24:21,660 --> 00:24:24,221
[Ian and Maxine moaning]
424
00:24:29,341 --> 00:24:33,381
[Maxine moans louder and louder]
425
00:24:36,940 --> 00:24:38,420
[birds chirping]
426
00:24:51,341 --> 00:24:53,341
Please tell me
you weren't watching me sleep.
427
00:24:53,420 --> 00:24:55,341
We're going to watch a movie.
428
00:24:56,900 --> 00:25:00,861
-It's a bit early for porn, isn't it?
-It's not porn. It's art.
429
00:25:00,940 --> 00:25:03,940
-Oh, really. What's it called?
-[Micky] Handbugger Hill.
430
00:25:04,021 --> 00:25:05,221
Part Two.
431
00:25:05,301 --> 00:25:06,741
[Micky pushing buttons]
432
00:25:08,061 --> 00:25:10,501
-[video playing]
-That is Richie Rockwood.
433
00:25:10,581 --> 00:25:14,021
[Micky] Ten inches of pure hard steel.
434
00:25:14,101 --> 00:25:17,541
He won the Gay Adult Video Awards,
Best Performer, three years in a row.
435
00:25:17,621 --> 00:25:18,741
[table trembling]
436
00:25:18,821 --> 00:25:22,301
-[Micky] He's gorgeous, isn't he?
-He's all right, I guess.
437
00:25:22,381 --> 00:25:23,861
No, he is not "all right".
438
00:25:23,940 --> 00:25:26,101
A cup of tea in the morning's "all right".
439
00:25:26,180 --> 00:25:29,861
Beans on toast is "all right".
Richie Rockwood is fucking incredible,
440
00:25:29,940 --> 00:25:34,261
and I want you to admit that to me,
right here, right now.
441
00:25:34,341 --> 00:25:36,460
[men moaning on video]
442
00:25:41,180 --> 00:25:43,381
-You saw us.
-You're too fucking right I did.
443
00:25:43,460 --> 00:25:45,821
-Ruined me dinner.
-It must be confusing for you.
444
00:25:45,900 --> 00:25:49,420
It's confusing for me too.
Really fucking confusing.
445
00:25:50,981 --> 00:25:52,900
Hey, don't worry.
446
00:25:52,981 --> 00:25:55,660
[Micky] We're going to sort you out.
We'll...
447
00:25:55,741 --> 00:25:58,700
We'll de-straighten you.
Everything'll be fine.
448
00:25:58,781 --> 00:26:01,261
-Ian, just watch the movie!
-I don't want to watch the fucking movie!
449
00:26:01,341 --> 00:26:02,621
-Fine. We'll go to bed then.
-No!
450
00:26:02,700 --> 00:26:05,460
You didn't have a problem yesterday
before she fucked with your head.
451
00:26:05,541 --> 00:26:08,180
-She didn't fuck with my head.
-So I'm just a piece of meat to you?
452
00:26:08,261 --> 00:26:09,581
A booty call.
453
00:26:11,141 --> 00:26:13,101
I'm sorry.
454
00:26:13,180 --> 00:26:16,981
I shouldn't have dragged you into this.
I shouldn't have slept with you.
455
00:26:17,061 --> 00:26:20,460
Yes, you should, Ian!
Because I'm a fucking man!
456
00:26:20,541 --> 00:26:22,821
-[door lock closes]
-And that is fucking natural!
457
00:26:22,900 --> 00:26:25,501
[men panting on video]
458
00:26:26,781 --> 00:26:29,261
-I'm not handling knock-offs.
-They're not knock-off.
459
00:26:29,341 --> 00:26:31,821
-They're 100% legit.
-Where did you get them from, then?
460
00:26:32,460 --> 00:26:33,301
I won 'em.
461
00:26:34,220 --> 00:26:35,741
In a raffle. Youth club.
462
00:26:36,741 --> 00:26:39,101
The youth club
was raffling off Ladyshaves?
463
00:26:41,741 --> 00:26:43,261
-50 quid.
-Done!
464
00:26:50,541 --> 00:26:51,581
Liam!
465
00:26:51,660 --> 00:26:53,061
Breakfast.
466
00:26:54,821 --> 00:26:57,900
Carl? Stella? Anyone?
467
00:26:58,700 --> 00:26:59,781
Hello?
468
00:27:03,420 --> 00:27:05,341
[lads cheering]
469
00:27:05,420 --> 00:27:06,460
All right, on you go.
470
00:27:06,541 --> 00:27:07,900
[lads cheering]
471
00:27:07,981 --> 00:27:10,501
Don't forget your souvenir snaps,
it's only two quid.
472
00:27:11,180 --> 00:27:14,940
Look, come home, son.
This is no place for a young lad.
473
00:27:15,581 --> 00:27:16,900
Oh, fuckin' 'ell.
474
00:27:16,981 --> 00:27:19,501
You only want me home
cos you can't look after yourself.
475
00:27:19,581 --> 00:27:21,741
[Frank] Well, yeah, obviously.
476
00:27:21,821 --> 00:27:22,781
But...
477
00:27:22,861 --> 00:27:25,821
You're part of me,
you're me flesh and blood.
478
00:27:26,501 --> 00:27:29,420
I'm like one of those amputees
who just lost a limb
479
00:27:29,501 --> 00:27:32,141
-and still thinks that it's there.
-Twenty quid.
480
00:27:33,061 --> 00:27:36,781
It's not about the cash, Liam,
it's about family.
481
00:27:36,861 --> 00:27:38,420
Twenty quid.
482
00:27:38,501 --> 00:27:40,660
I could get a maid for that, a butler.
483
00:27:40,741 --> 00:27:42,741
-Me own personal Jeeves.
-Then get one.
484
00:27:44,021 --> 00:27:44,940
Just...
485
00:27:45,021 --> 00:27:46,420
[coins rattling]
486
00:27:46,501 --> 00:27:49,621
What? You what? Eh, eh?
487
00:27:49,700 --> 00:27:51,021
Fucking tried, didn't I?
488
00:27:52,261 --> 00:27:54,061
Me own fucking flesh and blood.
489
00:27:55,341 --> 00:27:57,981
[folk music playing]
490
00:28:02,660 --> 00:28:03,660
[door shutting]
491
00:28:04,261 --> 00:28:07,861
I think you must have wandered
into the wrong house, cos...
492
00:28:07,940 --> 00:28:10,981
everybody knows Paddy Maguire
wouldn't pay for it.
493
00:28:12,301 --> 00:28:13,420
[Paddy sighs]
494
00:28:13,501 --> 00:28:16,021
I just thought,
as two fellow entrepreneurs,
495
00:28:16,101 --> 00:28:19,141
we could have a little chat,
a business opportunity.
496
00:28:19,220 --> 00:28:20,581
We're doing fine as we are.
497
00:28:21,781 --> 00:28:24,261
-You haven't even heard my proposal.
-That's right.
498
00:28:24,861 --> 00:28:25,821
I haven't.
499
00:28:27,180 --> 00:28:28,021
Goodbye, Paddy.
500
00:28:33,101 --> 00:28:34,501
Try and control your woman, son
501
00:28:38,301 --> 00:28:39,821
before someone else has to.
502
00:28:42,341 --> 00:28:43,660
[door lock opens]
503
00:28:48,220 --> 00:28:49,541
[Jamie scoffs]
504
00:28:52,700 --> 00:28:54,021
[paper crumpling]
505
00:28:56,861 --> 00:28:58,180
[unfolding paper]
506
00:29:01,061 --> 00:29:02,900
[tense music]
507
00:29:04,460 --> 00:29:06,621
[both pant]
508
00:29:13,301 --> 00:29:15,021
Whatever your game is, I'm not interested.
509
00:29:15,101 --> 00:29:16,141
[Michelle] Jamie...
510
00:29:16,220 --> 00:29:18,301
It is Jamie, right?
511
00:29:18,381 --> 00:29:19,381
Well, sit down.
512
00:29:20,101 --> 00:29:24,301
Now, there's a woman
in Manchester on a conference.
513
00:29:25,420 --> 00:29:27,420
Three months ago, she discovered
514
00:29:27,501 --> 00:29:30,940
that her husband had been having
an affair for over two years.
515
00:29:31,021 --> 00:29:33,341
She's vulnerable, a little insecure,
516
00:29:33,980 --> 00:29:35,541
but, most importantly,
517
00:29:35,621 --> 00:29:36,861
she needs cheering up,
518
00:29:36,940 --> 00:29:40,101
and someone like you could really put
the smile back on her face.
519
00:29:40,180 --> 00:29:42,900
[Jamie laughs]
You've got to be kidding, yeah?
520
00:29:42,980 --> 00:29:46,261
Er, I put 200 in your pocket.
Missing 50 here.
521
00:29:47,381 --> 00:29:48,420
I had bills to pay.
522
00:29:49,180 --> 00:29:52,101
Times are hard. I get it.
That's why I'm offering you work.
523
00:29:53,061 --> 00:29:54,261
I said I had bills.
524
00:29:54,341 --> 00:29:56,821
I didn't say I wanting to become
a fucking man-whore.
525
00:29:56,900 --> 00:29:59,621
[chuckling] You still took 50 quid off me
to pay some bills.
526
00:29:59,700 --> 00:30:01,180
But it won't be enough, will it?
527
00:30:01,261 --> 00:30:03,341
Because there's always
another brown envelope
528
00:30:03,420 --> 00:30:04,861
waiting to land on the doormat.
529
00:30:05,900 --> 00:30:08,541
[Michelle]
One hour's work, and you get this.
530
00:30:10,460 --> 00:30:12,021
No. I'm not interested.
531
00:30:12,101 --> 00:30:13,501
You are going to walk away...
532
00:30:14,341 --> 00:30:15,420
from this?
533
00:30:15,501 --> 00:30:17,700
I've got a wife and a kid, so, yeah...
534
00:30:18,460 --> 00:30:19,541
I am.
535
00:30:21,220 --> 00:30:23,460
[piano playing]
536
00:30:27,501 --> 00:30:28,621
Think about it.
537
00:30:31,741 --> 00:30:32,581
[car door shuts]
538
00:30:34,021 --> 00:30:39,541
Hey, I can guarantee you
at least 200 quid a session, right?
539
00:30:39,621 --> 00:30:41,501
Well, that's three sessions a week,
540
00:30:41,581 --> 00:30:44,980
that's... nearly two and a half grand
a month, right? Tax-free.
541
00:30:45,061 --> 00:30:46,660
Yes, you have a wife and a kid,
542
00:30:46,741 --> 00:30:49,781
but that kind of money's got to make life
a lot easier for everyone.
543
00:30:50,741 --> 00:30:52,621
If you want to know more, get in the car.
544
00:30:53,980 --> 00:30:55,821
[upbeat drum music]
545
00:30:59,460 --> 00:31:00,341
[door shutting]
546
00:31:00,420 --> 00:31:03,180
It's through the back, gents.
Game kicks off in five minutes.
547
00:31:03,261 --> 00:31:06,621
It's a 100 quid minimum and,
time wasters, you know where the exit is.
548
00:31:08,341 --> 00:31:09,420
[door opens]
549
00:31:17,101 --> 00:31:18,021
No.
550
00:31:18,621 --> 00:31:19,741
What?
551
00:31:19,821 --> 00:31:21,180
I can't do it, Joe.
552
00:31:21,261 --> 00:31:23,660
One thing I've learned is
life has got to be simple.
553
00:31:24,501 --> 00:31:25,341
It is.
554
00:31:26,420 --> 00:31:29,940
You, me and the baby, we get in the car,
and we go. Right now.
555
00:31:31,781 --> 00:31:32,781
Heard you got tagged.
556
00:31:34,861 --> 00:31:35,781
Oh! That...
557
00:31:36,381 --> 00:31:38,381
Was a misunderstanding at the casino.
558
00:31:38,460 --> 00:31:40,301
It's a ten-minute detour to a mate.
559
00:31:40,381 --> 00:31:43,821
It's a blowtorch and wire cutters moment.
It's not a reason to stay.
560
00:31:45,621 --> 00:31:47,101
Jamie can't look after ya.
561
00:31:47,980 --> 00:31:50,821
-He can't provide for you, not like I can.
-He does his best.
562
00:31:50,900 --> 00:31:52,940
And it's never going to be good enough!
563
00:31:56,781 --> 00:31:57,740
I just came here...
564
00:31:58,621 --> 00:31:59,501
to say no.
565
00:32:01,740 --> 00:32:02,581
That was it.
566
00:32:04,301 --> 00:32:05,180
[door opens]
567
00:32:08,861 --> 00:32:10,261
[Joe grunts]
568
00:32:11,220 --> 00:32:13,261
Really fuckin' smooth, Joe.
569
00:32:14,501 --> 00:32:16,341
[sighs]
570
00:32:16,420 --> 00:32:17,381
[door knocking]
571
00:32:19,940 --> 00:32:21,021
[door lock opens]
572
00:32:21,101 --> 00:32:23,141
-Carl! Hey.
-[Carl] Shh! Come.
573
00:32:24,581 --> 00:32:25,420
[Carl] Come on.
574
00:32:25,501 --> 00:32:26,420
Sit down.
575
00:32:28,501 --> 00:32:29,341
Close your eyes.
576
00:32:30,220 --> 00:32:32,700
-[Carl] Come on, close them.
-[Maxine sighs heavily]
577
00:32:35,940 --> 00:32:36,821
Okay.
578
00:32:39,301 --> 00:32:41,381
-What's this?
-Open it and see.
579
00:32:46,261 --> 00:32:48,101
-Jesus! It's--
-Real.
580
00:32:50,700 --> 00:32:51,740
Wow, Carl...
581
00:32:51,821 --> 00:32:53,980
-You haven't thought this through.
-I have.
582
00:32:54,061 --> 00:32:55,061
Really.
583
00:32:56,061 --> 00:32:58,581
[Carl] Look, we've been stupid
and we've made mistakes,
584
00:32:59,781 --> 00:33:01,381
but I'm certain about this, Max.
585
00:33:02,621 --> 00:33:03,900
I really am.
586
00:33:03,980 --> 00:33:08,581
-You and me--
-Whoa! You've got terrible timing, you.
587
00:33:08,660 --> 00:33:10,940
-I'm running late for work.
-[Carl] Five minutes.
588
00:33:11,021 --> 00:33:13,420
I'm already on a warning.
They're going to kill me.
589
00:33:13,501 --> 00:33:14,940
Last chance, they said.
590
00:33:15,021 --> 00:33:15,980
[keys rattling]
591
00:33:19,021 --> 00:33:20,341
Go on, then. You better run.
592
00:33:21,740 --> 00:33:23,581
-[Carl] I'll come see you after.
-Yeah.
593
00:33:27,220 --> 00:33:28,220
[door shuts]
594
00:33:31,061 --> 00:33:32,420
-[Carl] Guess what?
-What?
595
00:33:32,501 --> 00:33:33,821
I'm getting married!
596
00:33:38,660 --> 00:33:39,900
[Micky sighs]
597
00:33:40,621 --> 00:33:41,541
[door shuts]
598
00:33:48,700 --> 00:33:50,220
[door lock opens]
599
00:33:53,141 --> 00:33:54,180
Come in.
600
00:33:54,261 --> 00:33:56,180
[police sirens approaching]
601
00:34:01,220 --> 00:34:03,180
Not going to give you much of a night out.
602
00:34:03,261 --> 00:34:05,220
-What do you want?
-Assistance.
603
00:34:05,301 --> 00:34:07,061
And what makes you think I'll say yes?
604
00:34:07,141 --> 00:34:09,860
Because you want to be
in full possession of your kneecaps.
605
00:34:11,700 --> 00:34:12,780
And...
606
00:34:12,860 --> 00:34:14,180
I'll be forever in your debt.
607
00:34:15,660 --> 00:34:16,660
Who knows...
608
00:34:16,740 --> 00:34:19,461
maybe it'll mend a few bridges
between me and your ma.
609
00:34:19,541 --> 00:34:22,541
Is this something like
being made an offer you can't refuse?
610
00:34:22,621 --> 00:34:23,541
No.
611
00:34:23,621 --> 00:34:27,021
It's exactly like being made
an offer you can't refuse.
612
00:34:28,941 --> 00:34:31,061
[calm soothing music]
613
00:35:03,300 --> 00:35:05,181
[indistinct conversation]
614
00:35:26,981 --> 00:35:29,381
Over a thousand quid in two days.
615
00:35:29,461 --> 00:35:31,300
God, if Lillian wasn't
coming back tomorrow...
616
00:35:31,381 --> 00:35:32,581
I know.
617
00:35:32,661 --> 00:35:34,780
I mean, the best thing is, we did this.
618
00:35:34,860 --> 00:35:35,780
[steps]
619
00:35:37,381 --> 00:35:39,061
Thought they'd all buggered off home.
620
00:35:45,741 --> 00:35:46,581
[snorting]
621
00:35:47,941 --> 00:35:49,061
[lad exhaling heavily]
622
00:35:49,141 --> 00:35:50,741
What the fuck are you doing?
623
00:35:51,701 --> 00:35:53,261
Out! Everyone out!
624
00:35:56,820 --> 00:35:58,780
-I'm sorry.
-[Kelly] Fuck being sorry.
625
00:35:58,860 --> 00:36:01,860
-What the hell is wrong with you?
-It's only coke.
626
00:36:01,941 --> 00:36:04,541
Since when have you been
a fucking coke dealer, Chesney?
627
00:36:08,581 --> 00:36:09,701
You're working for him?
628
00:36:13,021 --> 00:36:16,461
[breathes heavily]
Ok, you can piss off now.
629
00:36:17,461 --> 00:36:19,901
[Kelly] Uh-uh.
We're keeping the coke, and the money.
630
00:36:19,981 --> 00:36:22,701
-He'll fucking kill me.
-I'll handle him.
631
00:36:22,780 --> 00:36:24,541
I didn't have a choice.
632
00:36:27,661 --> 00:36:30,141
-So she said yeah, then?
-She's going to.
633
00:36:30,221 --> 00:36:32,901
I can tell. You see, I know Maxine.
634
00:36:34,141 --> 00:36:36,300
-No, you don't.
-What do you mean?
635
00:36:37,581 --> 00:36:41,021
You don't know Maxine at all.
You don't know anything.
636
00:36:43,661 --> 00:36:46,141
-Ian's sleeping with her.
-What?
637
00:36:46,221 --> 00:36:49,021
-Shut up!
-[Micky] I caught 'em.
638
00:36:49,101 --> 00:36:51,101
I'm sure you did. Ian and Maxine?
639
00:36:51,181 --> 00:36:53,061
[Micky] I came home,
and they were fucking.
640
00:36:53,141 --> 00:36:56,541
-They didn't see me.
-Look, Ian's gay and you're insane.
641
00:36:56,621 --> 00:36:58,141
Think about it.
642
00:36:58,221 --> 00:37:03,300
All that time they spend together,
laughing and joking. Best mates.
643
00:37:03,380 --> 00:37:05,021
More than best mates.
644
00:37:06,181 --> 00:37:07,621
You've seen it too.
645
00:37:08,581 --> 00:37:11,741
Micky, you're starting to piss me off now.
646
00:37:11,820 --> 00:37:13,261
Ask him, then.
647
00:37:13,340 --> 00:37:16,981
[Micky] Ask him about it.
Why would I lie to you, for fuck's sake?
648
00:37:17,061 --> 00:37:19,421
[Micky] I'm trying to stop you
making a fool of yourself!
649
00:37:19,501 --> 00:37:21,061
-Fuck off!
-[Micky] In his bed...
650
00:37:21,141 --> 00:37:25,780
I saw 'em. Fucking each other.
Look, I'm telling you this to help you.
651
00:37:25,860 --> 00:37:28,340
Why are you trying to mess
with me like this? [grunts]
652
00:37:28,421 --> 00:37:31,581
-[shouts] Tell me it's a lie! Tell me!
-I can't!
653
00:37:32,901 --> 00:37:33,741
It's not!
654
00:37:34,380 --> 00:37:35,780
[Carl sobbing] Ian and Maxine?
655
00:37:36,901 --> 00:37:37,860
[Carl] My Maxine?
656
00:37:39,741 --> 00:37:40,581
No...
657
00:37:41,380 --> 00:37:42,820
[Carl] That's not fucking...
658
00:37:43,581 --> 00:37:45,820
That's not fucking possible. She wouldn't.
659
00:37:45,901 --> 00:37:47,541
She wants to be with me.
660
00:37:47,621 --> 00:37:51,141
She got up and walked out on you
the moment you pulled out that ring.
661
00:37:51,221 --> 00:37:52,501
Has she called you about it?
662
00:37:52,581 --> 00:37:53,981
Texted you?
663
00:37:54,820 --> 00:37:55,741
Anything?
664
00:37:56,340 --> 00:37:59,981
No. Because she's fucking your brother.
665
00:38:00,061 --> 00:38:00,901
Fuck you!
666
00:38:01,941 --> 00:38:03,261
[in anger] That's not true!
667
00:38:04,820 --> 00:38:06,501
[Carl sobbing] It's not fucking true!
668
00:38:21,621 --> 00:38:24,820
[soft tense music]
669
00:38:30,621 --> 00:38:34,941
[Michelle moaning]
670
00:38:41,380 --> 00:38:43,981
[Ian] Why the fuck did you tell Carl?
671
00:38:48,380 --> 00:38:50,901
-Because he loves her.
-No, no, he doesn't!
672
00:38:50,981 --> 00:38:53,141
-He just thinks he does!
-He proposed to her!
673
00:38:53,221 --> 00:38:55,421
-What?
-[Micky] And he was going to ask you
674
00:38:55,501 --> 00:38:56,941
to be the best man.
675
00:38:57,021 --> 00:38:59,340
-You!
-[Ian] Oh, no, this can't be happening!
676
00:39:01,261 --> 00:39:03,621
Just explain to him
that it was all an accident.
677
00:39:03,701 --> 00:39:07,221
How can I explain it to him,
when I don't even understand it myself?
678
00:39:07,300 --> 00:39:08,581
Well, the damage is done.
679
00:39:08,661 --> 00:39:10,661
So you better put a stop
to the whole thing.
680
00:39:10,741 --> 00:39:12,261
-It's for the best.
-No.
681
00:39:13,181 --> 00:39:15,380
[Micky] But you can't like her.
682
00:39:15,461 --> 00:39:16,621
She doesn't...
683
00:39:16,701 --> 00:39:18,461
She doesn't even have a cock.
684
00:39:18,541 --> 00:39:21,141
-Maybe I just like people.
-People with cocks.
685
00:39:21,221 --> 00:39:23,101
[Ian] Or maybe I am confused,
686
00:39:23,181 --> 00:39:24,901
and maybe me and Maxine are just mates,
687
00:39:25,701 --> 00:39:27,021
or maybe it's more than that.
688
00:39:27,101 --> 00:39:28,780
-How can it be?
-I don't know!
689
00:39:28,860 --> 00:39:31,021
[shouting]
I don't have all the fucking answers!
690
00:39:33,181 --> 00:39:34,021
I just know...
691
00:39:34,780 --> 00:39:37,741
That when I'm with her,
I'm not thinking man or woman.
692
00:39:37,820 --> 00:39:38,981
It's just Maxine.
693
00:39:40,061 --> 00:39:42,941
And maybe,
sexuality isn't one thing or another.
694
00:39:43,021 --> 00:39:45,461
Maybe it's something
that's just shifting and moving.
695
00:39:45,541 --> 00:39:46,541
Fuck you!
696
00:39:46,621 --> 00:39:47,621
What?
697
00:39:50,461 --> 00:39:51,300
[Ian] What?
698
00:39:52,901 --> 00:39:55,340
Fuck... you!
699
00:39:56,181 --> 00:39:59,541
I looked up to you.
I thought you meant something.
700
00:40:01,061 --> 00:40:02,621
Because until I met you,
701
00:40:04,101 --> 00:40:05,340
I was a freak.
702
00:40:06,541 --> 00:40:08,501
I was disgusted with myself.
703
00:40:09,501 --> 00:40:11,581
But you... showed me...
704
00:40:12,581 --> 00:40:13,941
that I didn't have to be.
705
00:40:18,501 --> 00:40:19,860
You're a fucking traitor.
706
00:40:19,941 --> 00:40:21,141
It wasn't...
707
00:40:22,421 --> 00:40:23,421
It wasn't personal.
708
00:40:23,501 --> 00:40:25,621
-I didn't mean to.
-[Micky] But you did.
709
00:40:25,701 --> 00:40:27,141
And I loved you.
710
00:40:27,941 --> 00:40:29,621
-Micky...
-And not in a...
711
00:40:29,701 --> 00:40:31,780
"want to shag him all over the place" way.
712
00:40:32,820 --> 00:40:34,101
But just love!
713
00:40:35,340 --> 00:40:38,221
Just proper fucking love!
714
00:40:41,661 --> 00:40:43,380
But now I see you for what you are.
715
00:40:46,941 --> 00:40:48,181
A cunt.
716
00:40:53,061 --> 00:40:54,941
[door slamming]
717
00:41:01,741 --> 00:41:04,141
[baby crying]
718
00:41:05,621 --> 00:41:07,901
I understand you have something
that belongs to me.
719
00:41:07,981 --> 00:41:09,541
We're having our dinner here.
720
00:41:10,380 --> 00:41:13,221
[Liam] Chips?
I've only had four of my five a day.
721
00:41:14,300 --> 00:41:16,380
Have a bloody banana, then.
722
00:41:22,981 --> 00:41:25,461
You had no right dealing at Lillian's.
723
00:41:25,541 --> 00:41:26,701
And to school kids!
724
00:41:26,780 --> 00:41:28,621
Free market. Supply and demand.
725
00:41:28,701 --> 00:41:30,340
Exactly the same as you were doing.
726
00:41:30,421 --> 00:41:35,421
No, no. I just wanted them to have fun.
Harmless fun, show them a good time.
727
00:41:35,501 --> 00:41:36,421
[Paddy] No.
728
00:41:36,501 --> 00:41:39,661
You wanted to make some easy cash.
At least I wasn't lying to myself.
729
00:41:40,261 --> 00:41:42,221
You don't have any bloody bananas.
730
00:41:42,300 --> 00:41:45,461
-Then have some milk or something!
-Milk?
731
00:41:47,701 --> 00:41:48,741
[Kelly sighs] Jesus!
732
00:41:53,981 --> 00:41:57,340
Don't you dare act like
you're better than me.
733
00:41:57,421 --> 00:42:00,581
You're the one who paid
to fuck your own son's girlfriend.
734
00:42:00,661 --> 00:42:03,021
And you're the one who took the money.
735
00:42:03,101 --> 00:42:05,461
Now, I would like my property back,
736
00:42:05,541 --> 00:42:06,701
thank you.
737
00:42:11,501 --> 00:42:12,780
[cabinet door opening]
738
00:42:17,981 --> 00:42:20,261
[unwrapping]
739
00:42:20,340 --> 00:42:22,021
[Paddy] True what they say, dear.
740
00:42:22,101 --> 00:42:25,741
If you look in the abyss long enough,
it'll stare right back at you.
741
00:42:32,101 --> 00:42:34,181
[indie music playing]
742
00:42:35,380 --> 00:42:36,221
Don't ask.
743
00:42:37,181 --> 00:42:39,741
I'm having a bit of tough time
of it at the moment.
744
00:42:39,820 --> 00:42:41,181
I haven't got any money.
745
00:42:41,261 --> 00:42:42,741
I don't want any money.
746
00:42:42,820 --> 00:42:44,300
I wouldn't ask you, anyway.
747
00:42:46,021 --> 00:42:46,901
Oh...
748
00:42:49,701 --> 00:42:51,300
I just... I dunno.
749
00:42:52,300 --> 00:42:54,541
Do you ever think
you're one thing and then...
750
00:42:54,621 --> 00:42:57,421
you breathe in and maybe you're not?
751
00:42:59,300 --> 00:43:01,741
I went to Southend-on-Sea once.
752
00:43:01,820 --> 00:43:03,181
The sixth circle of Hell.
753
00:43:04,300 --> 00:43:07,741
And I stood on the beach,
resisting the urge to do a Reggie Perrin',
754
00:43:07,820 --> 00:43:09,061
and there's this old fella,
755
00:43:10,181 --> 00:43:13,021
just eating custard creams.
756
00:43:13,701 --> 00:43:16,340
Just shoving them down his throat.
757
00:43:17,621 --> 00:43:19,340
And he looked...
758
00:43:20,501 --> 00:43:22,461
miserable,
759
00:43:22,541 --> 00:43:24,981
even though he'd probably
bought 'em all for himself.
760
00:43:25,061 --> 00:43:27,701
He looked so fucking miserable.
761
00:43:29,501 --> 00:43:30,780
I'm not sure I follow.
762
00:43:31,860 --> 00:43:32,860
Me neither.
763
00:43:34,300 --> 00:43:37,141
It's all fucking bits and pieces,
this life of ours.
764
00:43:38,621 --> 00:43:39,581
[Ian] Hmm.
765
00:43:41,701 --> 00:43:44,820
Could be worse. Could be a poof.
766
00:43:56,061 --> 00:43:57,181
[Ian sighs heavily]
767
00:44:03,701 --> 00:44:04,900
[kissing]
768
00:44:06,181 --> 00:44:07,581
[door opens]
769
00:44:10,501 --> 00:44:11,701
[door shuts]
770
00:44:11,780 --> 00:44:12,820
[Carl] So...
771
00:44:13,701 --> 00:44:14,981
Maxine, then.
772
00:44:22,461 --> 00:44:24,380
-[Carl] You fucking...
-[Ian] Ah!
773
00:44:24,461 --> 00:44:26,741
[Ian gasps in pain]
774
00:44:28,501 --> 00:44:29,701
[slamming]
775
00:44:29,780 --> 00:44:32,261
[Carl screams]
776
00:44:32,340 --> 00:44:35,501
-[Carl] You lied to me.
-[Ian gasps]
777
00:44:39,261 --> 00:44:40,860
[Carl screams]
778
00:44:40,941 --> 00:44:43,461
-[laboured breathing]
-You fucking knew!
779
00:44:43,541 --> 00:44:45,621
-[Ian grunts]
-[Karen] Carl!
780
00:44:45,701 --> 00:44:48,941
-[Carl] I'll fucking kill him!
-[Chesney] Stop it! He's your brother!
781
00:44:49,941 --> 00:44:50,900
[Carl spits]
782
00:44:50,981 --> 00:44:53,860
-[Carl] He's fucking dead to me!
-[Ian coughs]
783
00:44:53,941 --> 00:44:55,581
[Frank] Fucking hell.
784
00:44:55,661 --> 00:44:57,581
Ok now, you all right, son?
785
00:44:57,661 --> 00:45:02,101
[Ian coughs]
786
00:45:07,900 --> 00:45:11,461
-Ian, I'm--
-Don't say sorry.
787
00:45:11,541 --> 00:45:13,101
But I am.
788
00:45:13,181 --> 00:45:14,541
[Maxine] I'm sorry.
789
00:45:16,661 --> 00:45:17,981
I'm not.
790
00:45:25,541 --> 00:45:28,421
[Micky]
That's the thing about this world of ours.
791
00:45:28,501 --> 00:45:32,101
Even if we are twats,
it just keeps on rolling.
792
00:45:32,181 --> 00:45:33,141
[door closes]
793
00:45:34,061 --> 00:45:37,741
[Micky] Wife walks out on ya.
Father passes away.
794
00:45:37,820 --> 00:45:41,581
Cat gets run over by the number 10 bus.
Doesn't matter.
795
00:45:41,661 --> 00:45:42,860
[female voice screaming]
796
00:45:44,141 --> 00:45:47,900
[Micky] World's not going to stop,
not even going to pause for breath.
797
00:45:47,981 --> 00:45:48,820
[phone beeping]
798
00:45:56,261 --> 00:45:58,061
[pool balls clicking]
799
00:45:59,820 --> 00:46:01,380
I've got to pop out for a while.
800
00:46:02,181 --> 00:46:03,141
Sure.
801
00:46:05,900 --> 00:46:07,941
[Micky] Nobody cares about your problems.
802
00:46:08,021 --> 00:46:11,221
But sometimes you find someone.
803
00:46:11,300 --> 00:46:15,501
Someone who seems to understand,
someone who gets ya.
804
00:46:18,021 --> 00:46:19,860
[woman laughing]
805
00:46:19,941 --> 00:46:21,981
[Micky]
And for a little while, it's better.
806
00:46:22,061 --> 00:46:25,860
We can lie there in the dark,
and promise never to leave each other.
807
00:46:25,941 --> 00:46:27,820
We have someone to hold on to.
808
00:46:33,541 --> 00:46:35,141
For a little while, anyway.
809
00:46:41,340 --> 00:46:43,780
I've met someone.
We're gonna live together
810
00:46:43,860 --> 00:46:44,981
Her name's D'reen.
811
00:46:45,061 --> 00:46:45,941
Oh my god!
812
00:46:46,021 --> 00:46:47,661
-What happened to the kitchen?
-Bailiffs.
813
00:46:47,741 --> 00:46:51,061
-Never let the bailiffs in.
-Can you lend me some more money?
814
00:46:51,141 --> 00:46:54,181
This is it for the Maguires. 150 grand.
815
00:46:54,261 --> 00:46:55,780
And you're gonna rob it.
816
00:46:55,860 --> 00:46:57,661
-How much do you owe?
-1500.
817
00:46:58,820 --> 00:47:00,621
-Get down, son.
-[Liam] Why should I?
818
00:47:00,701 --> 00:47:02,621
-What have I got to live for?
-[all scream]
819
00:47:02,701 --> 00:47:04,380
[man] Hello, officers.
What seems to be the problem?
820
00:47:04,461 --> 00:47:05,621
I know you.
821
00:47:05,701 --> 00:47:06,501
[grunts]
822
00:47:06,581 --> 00:47:09,981
-None of this is done to make you jealous.
-This is your mid-life crisis, not mine.
823
00:47:10,061 --> 00:47:11,221
I want us to go to Cuba.
824
00:47:58,101 --> 00:47:59,061
[shaver buzzing]
825
00:48:03,421 --> 00:48:05,021
Oh, bastard!
826
00:48:07,981 --> 00:48:09,461
I'm not going to ask.
90296
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