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1
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:11,310
I love movies so much,
2
00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:13,230
but some movies are
more than movies.
3
00:00:13,360 --> 00:00:14,360
You know,
they become a part of you.
4
00:00:14,490 --> 00:00:18,140
And for me,
that's "Forrest Gump."
5
00:00:18,270 --> 00:00:19,410
I mean, I think
if I could be anybody,
6
00:00:19,540 --> 00:00:20,540
I'd want to be Forrest.
7
00:00:20,670 --> 00:00:21,490
I just love the guy.
8
00:00:21,630 --> 00:00:23,020
He's pure.
9
00:00:23,150 --> 00:00:25,320
He's funny.
He's thoughtful.
10
00:00:25,460 --> 00:00:26,500
He's historically important.
11
00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:30,330
And, I mean, his relationship
with his mother,
12
00:00:30,460 --> 00:00:33,940
that scene at her bedside
when he's like,
13
00:00:34,070 --> 00:00:36,160
"Mama, what's my destiny?"
14
00:00:37,770 --> 00:00:39,860
And she says, "Forrest,
15
00:00:39,990 --> 00:00:41,380
you got to find that out
for yourself."
16
00:00:41,510 --> 00:00:42,910
It--
17
00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:44,470
It just kills me, you know.
18
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:50,220
Excuse me.
19
00:01:03,060 --> 00:01:05,450
Sorry about that.
20
00:01:05,580 --> 00:01:06,970
What was I saying?
21
00:01:50,500 --> 00:01:52,110
Oh, hello.
22
00:03:17,370 --> 00:03:19,670
Gotcha.
23
00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:21,540
You got to see your face.
Give me that.
24
00:03:21,670 --> 00:03:22,890
Give me that.
25
00:03:23,020 --> 00:03:25,070
Mom!
26
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,380
- Wolfie.
- Stop.
27
00:03:27,510 --> 00:03:29,120
- Oh.
- Cut it out!
28
00:03:29,250 --> 00:03:30,770
Get inside.
29
00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:45,660
Open sesame.
30
00:03:56,880 --> 00:03:58,490
Mayday! Mayday!
31
00:03:58,620 --> 00:04:00,410
Pilot to tower, we have
an emergency landing--
32
00:04:00,540 --> 00:04:01,580
- It's not an airplane, Mom.
- Coming in.
33
00:04:01,710 --> 00:04:02,800
No, there's not an airplane.
34
00:04:02,930 --> 00:04:03,930
No, there's not.
35
00:04:04,060 --> 00:04:05,370
What is up with you?
36
00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:06,720
Why are you so grumpy?
- I'm not grumpy.
37
00:04:06,850 --> 00:04:09,720
I don't like you filming me.
Give me my camera.
38
00:04:09,850 --> 00:04:11,940
I have been filming you since
you were pooping your pants.
39
00:04:12,070 --> 00:04:12,730
This is not your camera.
40
00:04:12,860 --> 00:04:14,600
It is my camera.
41
00:04:14,730 --> 00:04:15,900
It is basically my camera
at this point.
42
00:04:16,030 --> 00:04:18,340
I lent it to you.
43
00:04:21,130 --> 00:04:22,820
What is the matter
with you now?
44
00:04:22,950 --> 00:04:24,080
Why are you so grumpy?
45
00:04:24,220 --> 00:04:26,090
I am not grumpy, Mom.
46
00:04:26,220 --> 00:04:27,960
I can become grumpy
if you would like
47
00:04:28,090 --> 00:04:31,530
to keep calling me grumpy.
48
00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:36,790
Well,
did have a surprise for you.
49
00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:39,580
No, no, we're not doing that.
50
00:04:39,710 --> 00:04:40,710
No.
51
00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:47,190
What?
52
00:04:47,330 --> 00:04:51,020
I--I may have
to take it back.
53
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:52,720
What?
54
00:04:55,330 --> 00:04:56,770
No peeking.
55
00:04:56,900 --> 00:04:57,990
Not peeking.
56
00:04:58,120 --> 00:04:59,820
Stop there.
57
00:04:59,950 --> 00:05:01,560
Surprise.
58
00:05:05,560 --> 00:05:08,170
Oh, Mom, this is nice.
59
00:05:08,300 --> 00:05:10,830
This is my stuff.
60
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:13,400
Oh, my posters.
61
00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:14,660
Hit play.
62
00:05:21,100 --> 00:05:22,580
I love this song.
63
00:05:22,710 --> 00:05:24,970
I love--
64
00:05:25,100 --> 00:05:26,450
oh.
65
00:05:26,580 --> 00:05:28,410
Oh, Mom!
66
00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:31,720
Wolfie?
67
00:05:31,850 --> 00:05:34,240
Mm-hmm.
68
00:05:34,370 --> 00:05:36,460
Oh, he smells so good.
69
00:05:40,160 --> 00:05:41,030
Hey, Mom,
what happened to Wolfie?
70
00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:42,690
What happened?
71
00:05:42,820 --> 00:05:45,250
Don't you remember?
72
00:05:45,380 --> 00:05:48,170
When you were about six,
73
00:05:48,300 --> 00:05:50,910
you had a really bad dream
one night.
74
00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,480
And when you woke up, you had
torn his little head off,
75
00:05:53,610 --> 00:05:56,350
and I put it back on for you.
76
00:05:58,660 --> 00:06:00,620
Why didn't you
sew it all the way?
77
00:06:00,750 --> 00:06:02,840
So you would remember
what you did.
78
00:06:05,880 --> 00:06:07,190
♪ Sara looked down
79
00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:09,190
♪ I was beckoned by a smile
80
00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:11,890
♪ She grabbed me by the wrist
81
00:06:12,020 --> 00:06:13,980
Hey, whose--
whose bed is this?
82
00:06:14,110 --> 00:06:16,200
It's a rented house.
83
00:06:16,330 --> 00:06:18,020
This--this is--
this is not my special bed.
84
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,290
It came furnished.
85
00:06:19,420 --> 00:06:21,200
Where are my trophies?
86
00:06:21,330 --> 00:06:25,030
Where--what is--whose
hatboxes--whose room is this?
87
00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:26,470
Whose room is this?
88
00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:28,380
Now you need
to just calm down.
89
00:06:28,510 --> 00:06:29,300
We're going to deescalate
a little bit.
90
00:06:29,430 --> 00:06:30,250
No!
91
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:31,520
No!
92
00:06:45,230 --> 00:06:49,710
I think we have a hungry
baby wolf on our hands.
93
00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:52,020
I'm not hungry.
94
00:06:52,150 --> 00:06:55,580
This is your mama,
and I know what you like.
95
00:06:55,710 --> 00:06:59,890
♪ Sara loves
her Juicy Fruit ♪
96
00:07:00,020 --> 00:07:03,900
Wait, did you make
a special trip to the store?
97
00:07:04,030 --> 00:07:05,720
Silence of the lamb chops.
98
00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:07,510
♪ She struts
while she chews ♪
99
00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:08,810
♪ Nothing there
to slow her down ♪
100
00:07:11,210 --> 00:07:12,860
So good.
101
00:07:12,990 --> 00:07:14,430
Oh, yeah.
102
00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:15,690
Okay, I was a little hungry.
103
00:07:15,820 --> 00:07:17,820
You think?
104
00:07:17,950 --> 00:07:20,130
Okay, so what's up with Wolfie?
105
00:07:20,260 --> 00:07:22,790
Well, don't be mad.
106
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:24,920
I might have watched
"Forrest Gump" again.
107
00:07:25,050 --> 00:07:26,830
Oh, honey, that is not
a healthy film for you.
108
00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:28,270
I know, I know.
109
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:29,310
I just love it so much.
110
00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:30,750
And I love Forrest.
111
00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:32,800
He just--he's such a great guy.
112
00:07:32,930 --> 00:07:34,270
He makes friends
everywhere he goes.
113
00:07:34,410 --> 00:07:35,800
And I just can't do that.
114
00:07:35,930 --> 00:07:37,190
You know,
I try to make connections.
115
00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:39,240
They end badly.
116
00:07:39,370 --> 00:07:41,190
I kind of feel like a failure.
117
00:07:41,330 --> 00:07:43,070
That's a natural feeling.
118
00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:46,200
All you need is a good,
old-fashioned Mama Bear
119
00:07:46,330 --> 00:07:49,160
and Wolfie jammy night.
120
00:07:49,290 --> 00:07:50,600
Just the two of us?
121
00:07:50,730 --> 00:07:53,290
Just like the good old days.
122
00:07:53,420 --> 00:07:55,170
Oh, man.
123
00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:57,040
Oh, man.
124
00:07:57,170 --> 00:07:58,210
This is going to be
a good night.
125
00:07:58,340 --> 00:08:00,080
Yes.
Yes.
126
00:08:00,210 --> 00:08:02,220
Let's get our jammies on.
Watch a trashy film.
127
00:08:02,350 --> 00:08:03,740
Hey, hon.
128
00:08:03,870 --> 00:08:05,920
There's a strange looking
car in the--
129
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:09,090
Oh, oh, hey.
130
00:08:09,220 --> 00:08:11,010
I didn't--
131
00:08:11,140 --> 00:08:13,620
Wolfie, this is
my friend Albert.
132
00:08:13,750 --> 00:08:15,880
Albert, this is
my favorite son, Wolfie.
133
00:08:16,010 --> 00:08:18,540
Ah, hey, man.
134
00:08:18,670 --> 00:08:20,890
It's good to meet you.
135
00:08:21,020 --> 00:08:23,150
Yeah.
Yeah.
136
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:28,940
Man, I've--I've heard
a lot about you, man.
137
00:08:32,680 --> 00:08:34,730
Yeah.
- Wolfie?
138
00:08:41,780 --> 00:08:44,210
Honey?
139
00:08:44,340 --> 00:08:46,830
Wolfie?
140
00:08:49,390 --> 00:08:51,350
Did I--
141
00:08:54,830 --> 00:08:56,100
Wolfie?
142
00:09:03,930 --> 00:09:05,150
Oh, God.
143
00:09:21,210 --> 00:09:24,300
This is not how
we get attention.
144
00:09:26,740 --> 00:09:27,780
Hello?
145
00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:47,190
You get out of there.
146
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:50,060
This is not funny.
147
00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:51,980
Get out of there
and come inside
148
00:09:52,110 --> 00:09:54,200
and be nice to my friend.
149
00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:58,940
Wolfie?
150
00:09:59,070 --> 00:10:00,160
7Wolfie?
151
00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:09,260
Gotcha.
152
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,790
There he is, Alberto.
153
00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:18,440
Hey.
154
00:10:18,570 --> 00:10:20,310
- Looking good, man.
- Thanks. You too, man.
155
00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:22,490
Oh, thanks.
156
00:10:22,620 --> 00:10:23,970
Oh, hi, Mom.
157
00:10:24,100 --> 00:10:25,100
Go and put on a shirt.
158
00:10:25,230 --> 00:10:27,100
Why?
159
00:10:27,230 --> 00:10:29,970
Because people are
going to be trying to eat.
160
00:10:30,100 --> 00:10:32,370
Bother you if I have
dinner shirtless, Albert?
161
00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:34,020
Oh, it's all good.
162
00:10:34,150 --> 00:10:37,370
Come on.
- Albert doesn't mind.
163
00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:41,030
So, Albert, tell me,
what do you do for a living?
164
00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:42,990
Oh, I'm a jack of all trades
kind of guy, you know.
165
00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:44,070
Pretty simple.
166
00:10:44,200 --> 00:10:46,990
Yeah. Yeah.
167
00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:48,600
- Make good money doing that?
- Yeah, I do all right.
168
00:10:48,730 --> 00:10:50,340
Yeah?
169
00:10:50,470 --> 00:10:51,430
What--what do you--
what do you make in a day,
170
00:10:51,560 --> 00:10:53,080
just out of curiosity?
171
00:10:53,210 --> 00:10:55,390
Oh, I don't think much
about that, you know.
172
00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:58,910
But, hey, what do you do?
173
00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:01,530
I'm a filmmaker, Albert.
174
00:11:01,660 --> 00:11:03,050
- Really?
- Yeah.
175
00:11:03,180 --> 00:11:05,570
Oh, man.
176
00:11:05,700 --> 00:11:08,230
You know...
177
00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:11,400
I always wanted to try
my hand at--you know, but--
178
00:11:11,540 --> 00:11:12,930
- Really?
- Yeah.
179
00:11:13,060 --> 00:11:14,190
Mom, Albert wants
to be a filmmaker.
180
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:17,580
It's interesting
because I am often
181
00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:19,060
looking for collaborators.
182
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:21,070
Pretty high turnover rate
in my profession,
183
00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:24,070
and I pay
a pretty good rate, Albert.
184
00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:26,290
I actually pay $1,000 a day
for someone to come film me.
185
00:11:26,420 --> 00:11:28,940
- Ooh.
- Yeah.
186
00:11:29,070 --> 00:11:31,160
I don't know if you're
interested in trying it,
187
00:11:31,290 --> 00:11:33,040
but I could--I could teach you.
It's not rocket science.
188
00:11:33,170 --> 00:11:34,510
I mean,
I can give you the camera.
189
00:11:34,650 --> 00:11:35,560
I can show you
how to do it tonight.
190
00:11:35,690 --> 00:11:36,820
No, no, no, no.
Bad idea.
191
00:11:40,170 --> 00:11:41,870
You guys are cute together.
192
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,610
Look at you guys,
little lovebirds.
193
00:11:43,740 --> 00:11:45,180
Little lovebirds.
How did you guys meet?
194
00:11:45,310 --> 00:11:46,830
What's the story?
I want the meet cute.
195
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:48,880
Give it to me.
- Uh, the classic tale.
196
00:11:49,010 --> 00:11:52,320
You know,
she saw an advert I had
197
00:11:52,450 --> 00:11:56,190
posted up in the bulletin board
down in the town, you know.
198
00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:59,980
And she had a plumbing issue,
and I took care of it.
199
00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:02,850
And one thing led to another,
and here we are.
200
00:12:02,980 --> 00:12:04,410
Yeah.
201
00:12:04,540 --> 00:12:05,680
Great.
202
00:12:05,810 --> 00:12:06,850
Yeah.
203
00:12:06,980 --> 00:12:08,370
What thing was that, Albert?
204
00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:09,460
I'm sorry?
205
00:12:09,590 --> 00:12:11,250
Wolfie.
206
00:12:11,380 --> 00:12:12,770
What?
I'm just curious.
207
00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:14,290
Albert said
one thing led to another.
208
00:12:14,420 --> 00:12:15,470
I'm just curious
what the thing was.
209
00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:17,080
Um...
210
00:12:19,560 --> 00:12:21,820
You guys are being
super awkward right now.
211
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:24,170
I'm just trying
to be included here
212
00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:26,920
and figure out where you guys
are at in this relationship.
213
00:12:27,050 --> 00:12:28,870
Okay.
I mean, what are we doing?
214
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:30,830
Are we holding hands?
Are we kissing?
215
00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:32,440
Are we in second base,
third base mode?
216
00:12:32,570 --> 00:12:33,840
Are we--wait a minute.
217
00:12:33,970 --> 00:12:35,490
Are we fornicating?
218
00:12:35,620 --> 00:12:36,790
Are we sleeping
in the same room?
219
00:12:36,930 --> 00:12:39,840
No, we're not.
220
00:12:39,970 --> 00:12:41,580
Not fornicating, huh?
221
00:12:41,710 --> 00:12:43,410
We're not sleeping
in the same room.
222
00:12:43,540 --> 00:12:44,850
I have sleep apnea.
223
00:12:44,980 --> 00:12:47,410
I sleep in the guest room
downstairs.
224
00:12:50,850 --> 00:12:54,070
Well, isn't that interesting.
225
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:59,600
So Albert sleeps in my room
226
00:12:59,730 --> 00:13:01,910
in my special bed?
227
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:04,170
Oh, so now
it's your special bed?
228
00:13:04,300 --> 00:13:05,690
Yes, it is
my special bed, Mother.
229
00:13:05,820 --> 00:13:07,480
Yes, it is my special bed.
230
00:13:07,610 --> 00:13:08,830
And since it's my bed,
I would like to know
231
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:10,310
what happens in my special bed.
232
00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:12,610
- Wolfie.
- Oh, don't you Wolfie me.
233
00:13:12,740 --> 00:13:14,050
We tell each other
everything, right?
234
00:13:14,180 --> 00:13:16,310
No secrets, Mom.
No matter what.
235
00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:18,180
Go ahead.
236
00:13:18,310 --> 00:13:20,930
What--what happens
in my special bed?
237
00:13:26,020 --> 00:13:32,200
Everything happens
in your special bed.
238
00:13:32,330 --> 00:13:35,940
You remember when we watched
"9 1/2 Weeks" together?
239
00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:37,940
Yes.
240
00:13:38,070 --> 00:13:41,690
I'm living "9 1/2 Weeks"
52 weeks out of the year.
241
00:13:44,950 --> 00:13:46,910
Well, I think
that is wonderful.
242
00:13:47,040 --> 00:13:49,650
And I am very happy
for you two.
243
00:13:49,780 --> 00:13:51,350
So don't ask me anything
244
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:52,440
about what he does
to my breasts.
245
00:13:57,440 --> 00:14:00,490
Wow.
246
00:14:00,620 --> 00:14:03,140
Wow.
247
00:14:03,270 --> 00:14:05,190
What?
248
00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:09,020
You just crossed the line,
and you know it.
249
00:14:09,150 --> 00:14:12,190
Those breasts are sacred to me,
250
00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:13,630
and you're going to
whip them out at the table
251
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:16,200
and wield them as weapons
of war against me?
252
00:14:16,330 --> 00:14:18,030
You're just going to give them
away to the first plumber
253
00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:19,160
that comes along?
No offense, Albert.
254
00:14:19,290 --> 00:14:21,030
You seem like
a really nice guy.
255
00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:22,770
But you breastfed me
for six years.
256
00:14:22,900 --> 00:14:24,770
You made me addicted to them.
257
00:14:24,900 --> 00:14:27,170
Wow, Mom!
258
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:28,910
Wow!
259
00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:31,430
What are you even,
like, talking about?
260
00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:32,690
I never breastfed you.
261
00:14:32,820 --> 00:14:34,260
Oh, don't--don't start.
262
00:14:34,390 --> 00:14:35,830
I never did.
You were too aggressive.
263
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:37,440
Shut up!
Shut up!
264
00:14:37,570 --> 00:14:39,180
Oh, you were, like,
biting and tugging.
265
00:14:39,310 --> 00:14:41,610
You made me bleed, okay?
I couldn't breastfeed you.
266
00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:43,490
I wanted to,
but I couldn't, okay?
267
00:14:43,620 --> 00:14:44,970
I'm sorry.
268
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:57,150
You know, I noticed
that you have a rear--
269
00:14:57,280 --> 00:15:00,500
right rear axle
that's sitting kind of low.
270
00:15:00,630 --> 00:15:03,030
You got a jack?
271
00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:04,940
I can probably
fix that for you.
272
00:15:10,380 --> 00:15:12,780
Let's do it, Albert.
273
00:15:12,910 --> 00:15:13,950
Excellent.
274
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,130
Let's do it.
275
00:15:23,220 --> 00:15:25,750
Know what's funny, Albert?
276
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,530
What's that?
277
00:15:27,660 --> 00:15:30,100
Albert Natural is
my favorite band.
278
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:31,620
And here you are,
my new favorite friend,
279
00:15:31,750 --> 00:15:32,970
and your name is Albert.
280
00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:34,450
Yeah, it's crazy.
281
00:15:34,580 --> 00:15:36,020
Wait, what are you doing?
282
00:15:36,150 --> 00:15:37,370
I'm getting the jack out.
283
00:15:40,850 --> 00:15:42,980
The jack's in the trunk?
284
00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:47,160
Uh, yeah,
it's generally in the trunk.
285
00:15:51,900 --> 00:15:53,030
Huh.
286
00:15:55,910 --> 00:15:57,470
Okay.
287
00:16:16,140 --> 00:16:19,450
Okay, now, you're probably
thinking one of three things
288
00:16:19,580 --> 00:16:21,150
right now, Albert.
289
00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:23,020
The first one,
you'd like to be true.
290
00:16:23,150 --> 00:16:25,720
But, I mean, let's face it.
291
00:16:25,850 --> 00:16:27,160
We both know
we're awake right now.
292
00:16:27,290 --> 00:16:28,980
It's not a dream, okay?
293
00:16:29,110 --> 00:16:30,720
The second thing,
you'd really like to be true,
294
00:16:30,850 --> 00:16:33,250
but even the most
elaborate of pranks,
295
00:16:33,380 --> 00:16:36,210
they're not this elaborate.
296
00:16:36,340 --> 00:16:41,520
And the third thing
is exactly what it is.
297
00:16:41,650 --> 00:16:42,690
But I don't want you
to be worried.
298
00:16:42,820 --> 00:16:44,130
It's going to be okay.
299
00:16:44,260 --> 00:16:45,700
This isn't the first time
it's happened.
300
00:16:45,830 --> 00:16:47,130
It won't be the last.
301
00:16:47,260 --> 00:16:49,000
Okay?
302
00:16:49,130 --> 00:16:50,610
You may have found out
about this a little early
303
00:16:50,740 --> 00:16:52,620
in our relationship
than I anticipated,
304
00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:56,490
but it's not a bad thing,
because if your relationship
305
00:16:56,620 --> 00:17:00,490
with my mother is headed
where I think it's headed,
306
00:17:00,620 --> 00:17:03,100
you're going to be
my new dad, Albert.
307
00:17:03,230 --> 00:17:04,280
And this is going
to be something
308
00:17:04,410 --> 00:17:05,540
you're going to need to know--
309
00:17:05,670 --> 00:17:06,630
Albert, Albert, stay with me.
310
00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:09,330
Hey, hey, right here.
311
00:17:09,460 --> 00:17:10,760
This is one
very important thing, okay?
312
00:17:10,890 --> 00:17:13,330
Very important.
313
00:17:13,460 --> 00:17:16,330
Mama Bear cannot
know about this.
314
00:17:16,470 --> 00:17:17,290
She is too sensitive.
315
00:17:17,420 --> 00:17:19,210
Boys.
316
00:17:19,340 --> 00:17:21,510
What--what is
going on out here?
317
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,820
Nothing.
318
00:17:23,950 --> 00:17:25,560
What's taking so long?
319
00:17:25,690 --> 00:17:28,300
The dessert is ready.
It's getting cold.
320
00:17:28,430 --> 00:17:31,390
Albert, you want to come in
for some cobbler?
321
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,310
Huh?
322
00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:35,530
Cobbler.
Come on in soon.
323
00:17:35,660 --> 00:17:36,350
Yeah, we'll be right in.
324
00:17:36,490 --> 00:17:38,970
Okay.
325
00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:41,060
Love you, Mom.
326
00:17:53,020 --> 00:17:54,370
Hey, hon.
327
00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:58,200
Hey, hon, I--
I need to talk to you.
328
00:17:58,330 --> 00:18:02,210
What is wrong, Albert?
329
00:18:02,340 --> 00:18:05,910
I--I think there's
a problem with your son.
330
00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:08,340
He's a very complicated boy.
331
00:18:08,470 --> 00:18:09,650
No, no, no.
332
00:18:09,780 --> 00:18:14,570
I mean--I mean, a real problem.
333
00:18:14,700 --> 00:18:17,830
Well, you know, in fact,
he does have a--a tendency
334
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:21,100
to be just a teensy little bit
conflicted about new men
335
00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:22,920
in my life,
which is why I didn't tell him
336
00:18:23,050 --> 00:18:25,100
about you up front.
337
00:18:25,230 --> 00:18:29,020
But I think
he's now mature enough
338
00:18:29,150 --> 00:18:32,450
to not get confrontational.
339
00:18:34,930 --> 00:18:38,370
No, no.
340
00:18:38,500 --> 00:18:39,720
You're--you're not hearing me.
341
00:18:39,850 --> 00:18:43,860
I--I think
342
00:18:43,990 --> 00:18:45,950
your son might have
killed someone.
343
00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:48,640
What?
344
00:18:48,770 --> 00:18:50,040
I opened the trunk
to his car and--
345
00:18:53,780 --> 00:18:55,170
Wolfie!
346
00:18:55,300 --> 00:18:57,650
What did you do?
347
00:18:57,780 --> 00:18:59,520
I liked him.
348
00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:00,830
I liked him too.
349
00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,310
Then why did you do that?
350
00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:04,090
It's complicated.
351
00:19:04,230 --> 00:19:08,880
It is very, very naughty
and messy.
352
00:19:09,010 --> 00:19:11,410
This is on you.
353
00:19:11,540 --> 00:19:13,890
You're digging this one
all by yourself.
354
00:19:14,020 --> 00:19:16,410
That's right, mister.
355
00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:17,850
Fine. I'll dig the hole.
356
00:19:17,980 --> 00:19:18,800
I don't care.
357
00:19:22,460 --> 00:19:26,120
What does this
remind you of, Mom?
358
00:19:26,250 --> 00:19:28,510
It's like Forrest and Bubba.
359
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:30,600
"I gotta find Bubba."
360
00:19:35,260 --> 00:19:36,340
Maybe a little
help here, please?
361
00:19:36,470 --> 00:19:37,610
Nope.
362
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,360
Thank you.
363
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,020
Chop, chop.
364
00:20:12,380 --> 00:20:14,690
When did you dig this?
365
00:20:14,820 --> 00:20:18,260
Remember when I said I went
to the bathroom earlier?
366
00:20:18,390 --> 00:20:20,040
I didn't go to the bathroom.
367
00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:24,830
My naughty, naughty boy.
368
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:25,920
You know--
369
00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:34,230
Look, in fairness,
370
00:20:34,360 --> 00:20:35,750
I didn't know jacks are kept
in the trunk.
371
00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:37,450
Like, you did
all the car stuff.
372
00:20:37,580 --> 00:20:39,020
I didn't--you didn't
teach me any of that.
373
00:20:39,150 --> 00:20:40,450
And he was the one
who kept insisting
374
00:20:40,580 --> 00:20:41,840
to get in there
in the first place.
375
00:20:41,970 --> 00:20:43,630
I wasn't even planning
on doing it this early.
376
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:44,330
Yeah, but you didn't
have to give him the keys.
377
00:20:44,460 --> 00:20:45,670
You did not have to do that.
378
00:20:49,720 --> 00:20:50,940
You know what?
You're right.
379
00:20:51,070 --> 00:20:51,980
Thank you for that.
380
00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:55,210
I'm sorry.
381
00:20:55,340 --> 00:20:57,950
I just--I struggle
with the new men.
382
00:20:58,080 --> 00:20:59,120
I always have.
383
00:21:00,990 --> 00:21:01,990
Don't walk away.
384
00:21:02,130 --> 00:21:03,560
Where are you going?
385
00:21:03,690 --> 00:21:05,690
It's time to say goodbye
to my Albert.
386
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,530
L'amour, l'amour.
387
00:21:25,100 --> 00:21:27,670
Do you remember
when I was 10,
388
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:29,590
and you were trying to get me
into that good school,
389
00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:31,240
and they didn't think
I was good enough?
390
00:21:31,370 --> 00:21:35,810
And you invited
that principal over.
391
00:21:35,940 --> 00:21:39,340
And you served him
lamb chops and red wine.
392
00:21:39,470 --> 00:21:41,210
And you told me to go outside
and play in the woods
393
00:21:41,340 --> 00:21:42,730
until you came and got me.
394
00:21:45,390 --> 00:21:48,430
I was naughty that night, Mama.
395
00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:51,390
I stayed on the porch.
396
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:54,400
And I listened.
397
00:21:54,530 --> 00:21:57,620
I heard what you did
with that man.
398
00:21:57,750 --> 00:22:02,660
I heard his deep,
orgasmic grunting.
399
00:22:08,760 --> 00:22:11,460
I was just a poor Southern boy,
400
00:22:11,590 --> 00:22:14,590
braces on my legs
and a substandard IQ.
401
00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:16,200
- Wolfie!
- What--what?
402
00:22:16,330 --> 00:22:17,900
You're doing it again.
403
00:22:18,030 --> 00:22:19,460
- Doing what?
- You're misremembering.
404
00:22:19,590 --> 00:22:21,070
That's a scene
from "Forrest Gump."
405
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:22,250
No, it's not.
406
00:22:25,990 --> 00:22:28,990
Oh, right.
407
00:22:33,650 --> 00:22:35,090
Could it be both, though?
408
00:22:35,220 --> 00:22:37,870
Could it be
"Forrest Gump" and us?
409
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:41,310
Oh, honey.
410
00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:45,050
I'm sorry I never told you
about the breastfeeding.
411
00:22:45,180 --> 00:22:46,490
Okay?
412
00:22:46,620 --> 00:22:48,450
I knew how you felt
about my girls.
413
00:22:48,580 --> 00:22:50,360
I didn't want to break
your little heart.
414
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:01,460
You think it's too late
for us, Mom?
415
00:23:01,590 --> 00:23:02,990
I don't know.
416
00:23:03,120 --> 00:23:04,940
We're pretty different
kind of people.
417
00:23:05,070 --> 00:23:06,770
We're never going to have
a normal life.
418
00:23:06,900 --> 00:23:09,770
No, not that. I mean...
419
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:16,390
Do you think
it's too late for us?
27983
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