Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:33,210 --> 00:01:36,550
We interrupt our regular programming for
a special news report.
2
00:01:36,990 --> 00:01:39,230
Here is NBC News correspondent John
Palmer.
3
00:01:39,450 --> 00:01:43,470
This morning, three more pregnant men
have been cited. The men, each of whom
4
00:01:43,470 --> 00:01:46,690
in his ninth month, were discovered in
Oconomowoc, Wisconsin.
5
00:01:47,130 --> 00:01:50,990
This brings the total number of pregnant
men in the United States to well over
6
00:01:50,990 --> 00:01:52,870
11 ,300 ,000.
7
00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:57,300
As we reported earlier, this phenomenon
has been traced to the eruption of a
8
00:01:57,300 --> 00:01:58,340
volcano in Peru.
9
00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:02,860
Scientists say spores from the volcano
have altered the world's water supply,
10
00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:04,980
enabling men to become pregnant.
11
00:02:05,180 --> 00:02:09,740
As yet, no man has given birth, but
millions are due at any moment. The
12
00:02:09,740 --> 00:02:12,540
hospitals are standing at the ready in a
state of total confusion.
13
00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:14,420
Wait, this just in.
14
00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:19,440
Another pregnant man has been spotted at
a car dealership in Marietta, Ohio.
15
00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:21,840
Stay tuned for further updates.
16
00:02:23,130 --> 00:02:26,090
Honey! Honey, get down, honey. They just
found four more.
17
00:02:26,330 --> 00:02:27,330
All right!
18
00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:55,740
I feel sorry for them.
19
00:02:56,540 --> 00:02:58,480
I feel sorry for myself.
20
00:03:04,740 --> 00:03:09,200
Please, please, please, don't even,
don't touch me, please.
21
00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:44,190
Can you scoot? Can you?
22
00:03:44,930 --> 00:03:46,930
Yeah, just that. Be careful.
23
00:03:47,530 --> 00:03:48,530
Now,
24
00:03:52,470 --> 00:03:53,470
is that better?
25
00:03:53,610 --> 00:03:56,770
I've got to put them up. Yes, let's put
them up here on the table.
26
00:04:00,510 --> 00:04:01,770
They're not bending well.
27
00:04:03,390 --> 00:04:05,690
Now, how's that?
28
00:04:06,570 --> 00:04:07,570
It's much better.
29
00:04:08,670 --> 00:04:09,910
Where's that mess come from?
30
00:04:10,110 --> 00:04:11,610
Who ate down here?
31
00:04:12,010 --> 00:04:16,890
I did, Cliff. And why didn't you clean
the mess up? Well, honey, I'm tired. I
32
00:04:16,890 --> 00:04:21,110
want you to clean the mess up. You
people come in here and you eat, and I
33
00:04:21,110 --> 00:04:25,230
finished cleaning, and then you come
behind. Never mind. I'll get it myself.
34
00:04:25,290 --> 00:04:26,290
no, no, no, no. I'll get it myself.
35
00:04:27,510 --> 00:04:31,990
I'll get it. I don't understand why you
can't clean this mess up after you've
36
00:04:31,990 --> 00:04:33,770
finished eating. And look at this.
37
00:04:34,290 --> 00:04:39,650
Look at this. I just dusted in here. I
just dusted and cleaned. And now look at
38
00:04:39,650 --> 00:04:41,610
the floor. I'm going to have to vacuum.
39
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:45,780
I'm sorry, Cliff. I'll vacuum. No,
you're not sorry. You don't care about
40
00:04:45,780 --> 00:04:47,400
way I look. You don't care.
41
00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:48,620
Honey, please.
42
00:04:49,700 --> 00:04:50,700
Honey, please.
43
00:04:51,660 --> 00:04:52,660
Oh, my.
44
00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:55,760
Sweetheart, come on now.
45
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:58,000
No, no, no.
46
00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:01,600
Just relax now.
47
00:05:23,820 --> 00:05:25,800
Where's Alvin? Oh, he's on his way
48
00:06:12,810 --> 00:06:13,810
low to the ground.
49
00:06:15,390 --> 00:06:17,630
Must have been made by women. Hi.
50
00:06:19,750 --> 00:06:20,750
Have a seat.
51
00:06:46,220 --> 00:06:48,060
I gained another eight pounds.
52
00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:50,600
You look gorgeous.
53
00:06:51,080 --> 00:06:52,080
I do not.
54
00:06:52,460 --> 00:06:56,080
Well, I stopped having morning sickness.
Now I'm having afternoon sickness,
55
00:06:56,260 --> 00:06:57,260
night sickness.
56
00:06:58,020 --> 00:06:59,480
I'm sick at dusk.
57
00:07:01,300 --> 00:07:03,740
Men, you're going to drop them any
minute.
58
00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:06,260
Martin, are you sure it's only eight
pounds?
59
00:07:06,480 --> 00:07:08,160
Looks like you might be having twins.
60
00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:14,660
Well, if anyone could give him twins, it
would be me.
61
00:07:21,030 --> 00:07:23,610
Check it out. I didn't do too badly
myself.
62
00:07:27,390 --> 00:07:30,930
I can't wait to get started on the next
one.
63
00:07:34,210 --> 00:07:37,630
Look at his face, how it's filling out.
Isn't he cute?
64
00:07:40,110 --> 00:07:42,310
Ladies, shall we make our husband some
tea?
65
00:07:42,630 --> 00:07:43,690
Ah, good idea.
66
00:07:44,380 --> 00:07:46,920
Well, nothing for me, thanks. I can't
keep anything down.
67
00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:51,940
We'll be in the kitchen if you need us.
68
00:07:52,260 --> 00:07:53,260
Mm -hmm.
69
00:08:05,980 --> 00:08:06,980
Hi,
70
00:08:09,040 --> 00:08:10,040
everybody.
71
00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:11,240
Dad.
72
00:08:14,030 --> 00:08:20,890
Hey dad son How
73
00:08:20,890 --> 00:08:27,770
are
74
00:08:27,770 --> 00:08:33,970
you doing I'm doing as well as I can
it's not easy to deal with the idea of
75
00:08:33,970 --> 00:08:40,409
being an unwed father I Mean I can't
believe
76
00:08:40,409 --> 00:08:43,150
she just got on the bus and left town
77
00:08:46,990 --> 00:08:48,030
told me she loved me.
78
00:08:49,810 --> 00:08:52,150
But I guess it was only after one thing.
79
00:09:00,030 --> 00:09:03,230
That's what you get for giving it up
without a wedding ring.
80
00:09:06,730 --> 00:09:10,810
Well, I know it'll get your mind off
your troubles. It always helps me.
81
00:09:11,750 --> 00:09:12,810
Basketball. Hey, yeah.
82
00:09:13,190 --> 00:09:15,610
The Celtics are playing the Lakers. Turn
it on.
83
00:09:28,680 --> 00:09:32,560
A man, Magic Johnson, driving down the
court. He's moving so slowly.
84
00:09:34,800 --> 00:09:36,620
The man's eight months pregnant.
85
00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:41,580
Please turn this off. This is very
depressing.
86
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:48,740
Guys, let me ask you something. I mean,
have any of you thought about what it's
87
00:09:48,740 --> 00:09:52,300
going to be like when we give birth? I
mean, you know, the pain.
88
00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:55,840
Well, Dad, you've seen a lot of births.
What's it like?
89
00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:57,240
It's going to be pain.
90
00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:01,720
A lot of pain.
91
00:10:02,680 --> 00:10:06,700
Gentlemen, I don't like to hear this
kind of talk.
92
00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:08,040
We're men.
93
00:10:08,140 --> 00:10:11,420
We handle pain better than women, right?
94
00:10:14,860 --> 00:10:19,300
I'm sensing some hesitation here, and I
don't like it.
95
00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:26,120
Look, I am a proud member of this
country's military
96
00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:27,120
service.
97
00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:33,520
6 a .m. than most people do all day.
98
00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:38,420
We're tough. We can take it. So when I
say that men can take pain better, by
99
00:10:38,420 --> 00:10:40,140
God, I expect you to agree.
100
00:10:40,420 --> 00:10:41,420
Right? Right.
101
00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:42,960
All right. Yeah, son.
102
00:10:43,180 --> 00:10:44,180
Ooh!
103
00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:51,360
What if it's harder for us? I mean,
we'll never hear the end of it. We'll
104
00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:57,860
pact. No matter how bad the pain gets,
we won't let on. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
105
00:10:57,920 --> 00:10:58,739
yeah, yeah.
106
00:10:58,740 --> 00:10:59,659
Yeah, yeah.
107
00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:01,000
Ooh. All right.
108
00:11:01,420 --> 00:11:02,540
All for one.
109
00:11:03,940 --> 00:11:05,460
And one for all.
110
00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:08,120
And three for five. All right.
111
00:11:09,300 --> 00:11:09,780
I
112
00:11:09,780 --> 00:11:18,820
don't
113
00:11:18,820 --> 00:11:20,000
know why I'm coming out here.
114
00:11:20,580 --> 00:11:22,820
I have to go right back in there in a
minute.
115
00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:28,340
I'm going to have to spend the rest of
my life in that bathroom.
116
00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:37,340
I tell you, I don't know what's wrong
with me.
117
00:11:38,020 --> 00:11:41,780
But I just think I'm too old. I'm 52.
118
00:11:43,060 --> 00:11:44,780
I'm too old to have a baby.
119
00:11:48,140 --> 00:11:49,140
Cliff,
120
00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:52,200
are you all right?
121
00:11:53,100 --> 00:11:54,100
Contraction.
122
00:11:56,660 --> 00:11:58,560
Okay, let's go. We're going to the
hospital.
123
00:11:58,820 --> 00:12:02,120
But, Cliff, that's just your first
contraction, honey. The next one might
124
00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:04,160
come for 30 minutes. You have to wait
till they're five minutes apart.
125
00:12:04,750 --> 00:12:07,210
Don't tell me what to do with my body.
126
00:12:08,170 --> 00:12:09,370
Now, I'm going.
127
00:12:09,690 --> 00:12:10,690
Let's go.
128
00:12:10,830 --> 00:12:14,830
Cliff, we have to time these things when
they're five minutes apart. You know
129
00:12:14,830 --> 00:12:15,789
how this goes.
130
00:12:15,790 --> 00:12:18,690
Look, I'm telling you, this is my body.
131
00:12:18,990 --> 00:12:21,050
Now, get the car ready.
132
00:12:21,430 --> 00:12:23,390
Saddle up, Roy. We're out of here.
133
00:12:24,250 --> 00:12:26,890
All right, Cliff. All right. I'll tell
you what. Let's get your bag and we'll
134
00:12:26,890 --> 00:12:29,910
put it down by the door. And then when
the contractions are five minutes apart,
135
00:12:29,990 --> 00:12:30,990
then we'll go.
136
00:12:31,210 --> 00:12:33,170
Look, when was the last time?
137
00:12:33,530 --> 00:12:36,290
What was my contraction time? How long
ago?
138
00:12:36,670 --> 00:12:40,590
I don't know. I guess about a minute
ago. What do you mean you don't know?
139
00:12:41,270 --> 00:12:46,070
That's the only job you have is to time
the contractions. You can't do a simple
140
00:12:46,070 --> 00:12:51,710
job. I'm having a baby, and you can't
remember what the time was from the time
141
00:12:51,710 --> 00:12:53,150
said, oh, that's your job.
142
00:12:53,550 --> 00:12:55,590
It's just a very simple job.
143
00:12:55,990 --> 00:13:00,590
You don't have anything else to do
except time the contraction, and you
144
00:13:00,590 --> 00:13:05,160
remember the time. All you know is you
want to get in the car and go. Well, go!
145
00:13:06,500 --> 00:13:10,720
And I'll tell you something else. It's
the last time you and I get in this bed
146
00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:11,720
together.
147
00:14:41,160 --> 00:14:42,680
Good exercise, good exercise.
148
00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:48,380
I thought I'd seen it all.
149
00:14:51,020 --> 00:14:57,800
The 1939 World's Fair, combat in Sicily,
Elvis on the Ed Sullivan Show, and last
150
00:14:57,800 --> 00:15:01,440
week I swear I saw Elvis alive at the
Paramus Mall.
151
00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:06,260
But I've never seen men giving birth.
152
00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:07,560
It's remarkable.
153
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,080
Grandpa, how did you manage to avoid
this?
154
00:15:10,300 --> 00:15:12,680
Well, didn't you hear the news bulletin
this morning?
155
00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:18,320
They say when the volcano erupted, the
spores didn't get to the water supply in
156
00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:19,320
New Jersey.
157
00:15:20,780 --> 00:15:21,900
You know, I'm curious.
158
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,540
Are you planning to breastfeed?
159
00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:11,640
Russell,
160
00:16:12,860 --> 00:16:15,220
go get our car. We'll take the unwed
one.
161
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:10,880
Uh -huh. Shut up.
162
00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:16,900
Now, when I was on the wrestling team in
high school, my coach would say to us,
163
00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:21,119
the toughest battle you'll face is with
your courage.
164
00:17:22,339 --> 00:17:26,579
Then, he'd look each of us in the eye
and say,
165
00:18:17,070 --> 00:18:19,710
Honey, come on. Give me a break. I
wasn't inhaling.
166
00:18:20,090 --> 00:18:21,290
Give me back.
167
00:18:30,010 --> 00:18:31,010
Dr.
168
00:18:36,030 --> 00:18:37,750
Strauss. Dr. Huxtable.
169
00:18:38,290 --> 00:18:39,450
All the Huxtables.
170
00:18:39,970 --> 00:18:42,430
I, uh... He came to make a delivery.
171
00:18:44,050 --> 00:18:45,570
Any men delivery yet?
172
00:18:45,790 --> 00:18:49,860
Yeah. Your neighbor, Jeffrey Angles,
gave birth just a couple of minutes ago.
173
00:18:50,500 --> 00:18:52,160
Well, let's burn rubber.
174
00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:58,400
Jeffrey! Look!
175
00:18:59,060 --> 00:19:00,060
Claire!
176
00:19:00,580 --> 00:19:02,120
We heard you just delivered.
177
00:19:02,580 --> 00:19:04,000
Yes, I did.
178
00:19:04,300 --> 00:19:05,360
How was it?
179
00:19:06,460 --> 00:19:10,160
You know, I can only say it was a
miracle.
180
00:19:10,540 --> 00:19:16,180
To think... that my body could bring
forth a little tiny creature that exists
181
00:19:16,180 --> 00:19:17,180
its own.
182
00:19:17,300 --> 00:19:19,540
I'm filled with such wonder.
183
00:19:20,100 --> 00:19:26,300
And they laid it on my chest for me to
hold. It had such a sweet, angelic
184
00:19:26,300 --> 00:19:29,580
face. It put my whole life into
perspective.
185
00:19:30,020 --> 00:19:33,760
Mr. Angles, when you gave birth, what
did it feel like?
186
00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:35,880
What did it feel like?
187
00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:38,500
Didn't you hear me screaming in there?
188
00:19:39,300 --> 00:19:43,650
It was the worst pain. I've ever felt in
my life. I didn't know that pain like
189
00:19:43,650 --> 00:19:44,650
that could exist.
190
00:19:45,890 --> 00:19:46,890
The horror!
191
00:19:47,570 --> 00:19:52,650
I don't understand how Mother Nature
could allow such terrible suffering to
192
00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:53,830
happen to a human being.
193
00:19:54,270 --> 00:20:00,630
I mean, when I was nine years old, I
fell out of my treehouse 20 feet onto
194
00:20:00,630 --> 00:20:03,730
stone patio, and then the treehouse fell
on top of me.
195
00:20:04,170 --> 00:20:06,890
But that was just nothing compared to
this.
196
00:20:10,420 --> 00:20:15,680
excruciating, searing, grueling,
unbearable, piercing pain.
197
00:20:16,220 --> 00:20:18,920
And when I think of where that...
198
00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:46,960
Cliff, honey, please.
199
00:21:52,170 --> 00:21:55,890
problem here. No, no, Cliff, you're
tensing, honey. You're tensing. I want
200
00:21:55,890 --> 00:22:01,010
to breathe. Come on, inhale, and push,
and push, and push.
201
00:23:01,230 --> 00:23:02,230
I love women.
202
00:23:02,350 --> 00:23:08,290
I think women are the most wonderful
people on the face of this earth.
203
00:23:43,310 --> 00:23:45,970
The Cosby Show is taped before a studio
audience.
15877
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof