All language subtitles for family_ties_s02e04_this_year_s_model

I bet we've been together for a million
years And I bet we'll be

together for a million more Oh, it's
like I started breathing

on the night we did And I can't remember
what I ever

did before What would we do, baby,
without us?

What would we do, baby? Without us And
there

ain't no nothing We can't love each
other through What would we do, baby

Without us Sha la la la

Sweden. That in Sweden?

No, just a map.

The actual country is much larger.

That is a terrible map of Sweden.

Where are your saunas? Where are your
Volvos?

Why didn't I do this in my room?

You're a Keaton, Jennifer.

What does it mean to be a Keaton?

You go the extra mile.

What else?

Perfection is my co -pilot.

That's right. Okay, we got a lot of work
to do here.

This thing is totally unusable.

Okay, we're gonna need eight strips of
number two balsa wood. We're gonna need

hundred yards of corrugated paper. We're
gonna need four pounds of plaster of

Paris and a herring.

Okay. Get that all together, give me a
shot, I'll have a look at it.

You're not going to help me?

No, you have to take it from here,
Jennifer. I'm just the idea man.

It's here.

My letter's here.

I can't deal with it.

Valerie, opening mail is a skill we all
have to learn.

The Columbus Express and the Ed Hansen
Agency are pleased to announce that

you've been selected to be photographed
in our annual mother -daughter modeling

event.

I won!

I won!

Oh, I'm going to be in the Sunday
Supplement! Look, there's a chance for a

professional modeling contract, a $250
prize.

This could be my big break.

How did you win a mother -daughter
modeling contest by yourself?

Ever hear of Mom?

I sent in that great picture that Dad
took of us at the beach last summer.

Wait a minute, Mallory. I was in that
picture.

I won!

I won the $1 ,000 modeling contest.

Whoa, is that like $250 each? Did we
split that or what? Relax, Alex. I cut

out of the picture.

I drew a volleyball where your head was.

about this that's because she doesn't
know it's a surprise I

didn't know you'd entered well we did
and we won

isn't it great wait a minute are you
saying

doesn't show her true feelings.

She just smiles as if she doesn't have a
thought in the world.

Then, uh, you should make a great model.

Thanks.

Yo, Yennefer.

You get that stuff I told you to get?

Uh, yeah.

Because I didn't have that number two
box of wood you asked for.

But the guy told me this stuff would
work just as well. Well, this.

What is wrong with you, Jennifer? We
can't use this.

That is the last time I send you to the
lumberyard alone.

Don't deny her her childhood, Alex.

Oh, hey, hey, that's a good idea,
Mallory. Maybe some of it will leak into

brain.

Mother, I've been reading these modeling
instructions. I've got it all planned

out. I'll wear my white dress, and you
can wear the black dress with the full

sleeves. Now, hold on, Mallory. I told
you I didn't like it when you entered me

in the contest without my permission. I
don't want to do this.

Why not?

It's not something she wants to do.

You know what's funny? Because it says
here Mom's been working towards a

modeling career her whole life.

Alex, give me that. No, Mallory, I think
it's important that Mom read her own

autobiography. Wait, what?

Autobiography?

After a hard day of shopping for
sweaters with my gorgeous daughter

hurried... home to make sure my
husband's happy in his favorite chair

robe, his slippers, and his pipe?

Mallory, that's ridiculous.

I don't smoke a pipe.

Get a load of Mallory's biography.

I've always liked the simpler things in
life.

Children, rain, cashmere.

Jennifer!

Mallory, it is unbelievable that you
would do this.

You're right, Mom.

I shouldn't have done it.

It's just that I really wanted to win,
and you were so busy, I didn't think it

would hurt.

I'm really sorry, Mom. I was wrong.

Good. I'm glad you can see that.

I do.

So will you do it?

No!

Why not?

I don't know. I feel silly.

Are you saying I'm silly for wanting to
do it?

All of you think I'm silly, don't you?

I do.

Oh, honey, don't.

Oh, boy.

She, uh, she seems upset.

I better go talk to her.

Sometimes only a brother knows what
needs to be said.

Modeling.

I better go, too.

Sometimes only a sister knows what needs
to be said.

Modeling.

I'll have to fake it.

Release.

Maybe you should think about giving in
on this one.

Stephen, she entered me in a contest
without asking me, and she wrote these

phony biographies? Okay, obviously
Mallory's gotten carried away.

But at least she's taking some
initiative, showing some enthusiasm.

I've always wanted her to care about
something.

I always hoped it would be physics
instead of fashion.

Well, they both start with a sound.

I'm not a model, honey.

Mom gets so carried away with their
outfits and tossing their hair. It's

not me.

It's just one day.

It would mean so much to her.

I guess it couldn't hurt.

Beautiful, beautiful.

I love it, I love it. Who's the mother?
Who's the daughter? I can't tell the

difference.

This is great, Mom.

Isn't this your idea of heaven?

Yeah, I always pictured a larger room.

Okay, Mom, Mallory, I'll be back in a
couple hours to pick you up. Got to get

Dad from the dentist.

Or I could wait around.

Dad can hitch.

Keaton girls, am I right? That's us.

What'd I tell you? Ed Hanson, I
recognize you from your pictures. Ed

What'd I tell you?

Here, my agency is co -sponsoring this
event.

Well, you and your...

Thanks, sweetheart.

Well, come on. Hey, I think we're almost
ready for you. Come on, follow me.

Isn't this great? Mom, I already have an
agent.

Remember, no frowning, grimacing,
pouting, and above all, don't smile.

causes more wrinkles than anything.

But, Mom, what if they want me to smile
for the camera? A high -fashion model

never smiles. She holds her head steady
and looks straight at the horizon.

You know, you have beautiful eyes.

Thank you.

Your nose and mouth are no slouches
either.

Not that I've ever seen that mouth
smile.

Was that a smile?

I think it was.

Hannah, what did I just tell you? No
laughing, no smiling.

Oh, this must be your sister.

Your mother and daughter going on a trip
to Paris.

Okay, take it, Philip. Okay, packing,
packing, packing.

Okay, you're smiling as you're packing.
You love packing. You love... traveling.

That's beautiful.

You love smiling.

Okay, keep it up. That's beautiful,
Elise. Beautiful.

Honey, sweetie, darling, would you mind
just taking one step behind your mom?

That's beautiful, honey. Beautiful,
beautiful.

Okay, I'm exhausted.

Camera.

Okay, it's airport time.

Let's go. We're going to the airport.

Come on, line them up.

Okay, you're getting ready.

You're getting ready. You're getting on
the plane.

Not so much turbulence, kid.

Keep it going. Keep it going. You're
coming down for a landing. You're coming

in. You're almost down.

You are down.

Okay.

Beautiful. I have seen you before. I
know I have.

Wasn't that you on the cover of
Cosmopolitan?

No. This is my very first modeling
experience.

You're not a professional model.

Come on.

No. My mom just brought me here for the
contest.

You know, I'm, uh, I'm planning a little
contact of my own.

Okay, ladies, ladies, we are in Paris
now. We're in Paris, okay?

Bonsoir, bonjour, merci.

Okay, we're going to go for a little
walk down the Champs -Élysées. Are you

ready? Start for walking.

Beautiful, walking, walking, walking.

Let me see a little Paris in those
faces.

Beautiful, beautiful.

Yes, it's a little too much Paris.

You see the Eiffel Tower?

See it. Love it. Point to it. Show it to
your kid.

You're not seeing it, kid.

It's a landmark. Love it.

Not that much, kid. It's not the Eiffel
Tower.

Honey, sweetie, darling, would you mind
just moving a little further to the

right? A little further.

That's good.

Further, further.

modeling job. Who is it, Mom? How much
are they offering? Don't sign anything

yet.

Do you mind? I'm trying to study here.

Study? Shouldn't the book be on your
head?

Alex, you're not helping me with my
project.

I'm going to get an F, and I'll never
get into college, and I'm going to wind

on the street selling thimbles.

Oh, thank you. I'll tell you, this
doesn't sound like it's for me.

Goodbye.

Details, Mom. Give me details.

Look. It was for a magazine ad, and they
wanted me to pose in a bubble bath.

Sounds like good exposure.

Does anyone expect me to get any
studying done around here?

Alex, you left me stranded in Sweden.

I'm on my way.

Quiet night by the hearth.

I tried to call you for hours. Was the
phone off the hook?

People have been calling here all day
about modeling. I guess they saw that

thing in the paper. Hey, that must make
the two of you feel great.

What, are you kidding, Dad? I wouldn't
waste my time on that stuff.

I'll get it.

Oh, hi, Ed. Hi there, Valerie.

Mallory. Right.

Hey, pretty exciting having your picture
in the paper, huh?

Oh, was it this week? Silly me, I
already threw it away and shredded it.

well.

Ed, Stephen King. Come on in.

Stephen, you must be Aliza's husband.

Yes, I am.

Elise, Proper Penguin Frozen Gourmet
Dinners is looking for a spokesperson

their TV commercial. Elise, they want
you, and they're shooting it tomorrow.

Tomorrow? Oh, that's a short notice.
Hey, no one turns down the penguin.

I'm not sure about this. Elise, they
took one look at you and said, Elise

is the Proper Penguin lady.

That's how I fell for her.

What do you say, Elise?

$1 ,500 for one day's work.

Fifteen, huh?

This is ridiculous, right?

Right. Do you need a proper penguin man?

Penguins!

Ready to go!

Mallory! I thought you all went bowling.

Oh, no, I told Dad to go ahead without
me. I've got a lot of studying to do.

Oh, sorry.

This is a day for your little
commercial.

I forgot.

I get out of your way.

Okay, people, this is for real.

Places, everyone, places.

Roll them.

Proper Penguin, frozen food commercial.
Take one.

And action.

I was held up at work. Traffic was
awful. How am I supposed to cook an

impressive dinner for eight important
friends in 20 minutes?

What about the proper penguin?

right in your freezer.

Escargot, turtle soup, succulent Peking
duck with all the fixings, and for

dessert, a cat.

What is it?

Sorry, Mom, can I have the ice cream at
Lucy's?

Right behind the turtles.

Sorry.

Here, Mallory.

Now, please don't interrupt.

I won't. I'm sorry.

Can I just get a spoon? No.

Places, everyone. Places.

Roll them.

Proper Penguin. Frozen food commercial.
Take two.

And action.

I was held up at work. Traffic was
awful.

How am I supposed to cook an impressive
dinner for eight important friends in 20

minutes?

What about the proper penguin?

Oh, I forgot. Thank you, Sir Penguin.

Look at that. An entire gourmet meal
right in your freezer.

escargot, turtle soup, succulent baking
duck with all the fixings, and for

dessert, yes, why not, crepe suzette
clambe.

And I'll top it off with proper penguin
premium Peruvian coffee in this hearty

boil -in -the -bag cup.

Why fool with instant?

Just pop it all in the microwave.

Excuse me.

Sorry, um, I'm just trying to help.

Look, kid.

It's 114 degrees in this suit.

Maybe I'll take a walk.

Make it a long one.

Okay, places, everybody, places.

Once more, from the top.

Ready, and roll.

Proper Penguin Frozen Food Commercial,
take four.

Okay, very quietly, once again.

impressive dinner for eight important
friends in 20 minutes.

What about the proper penguin?

take 22.

Action! I was held down at work. Graphic
was important.

How am I supposed to cook eight friends
and a penguin?

I

cannot

believe you behaved like that.

Finish the commercial, Mom.

Sure, after 34 takes.

It's not my fault you kept flubbing your
lines.

I don't think I would have flubbed them
so much if you weren't deliberately

trying to throw me off.

What? And don't you think I was doing in
there?

I just happened to be in the kitchen. I
was minding my own business.

Oh, and in the middle of shooting, you
just happened to yell, run for your

the house is on fire.

thing is bothering you please tell me
what it is all right i'll tell you

bothering me i'm the one who wanted to
be a model and you stole that away from

me now i'll never be one i didn't steal
anything from you if you hadn't been

there they would have chosen me to be
the proper penguin lady well maybe not

proper penguin lady but at least the
proper penguin daughter i didn't want to

get into this to begin with you dragged
me into it maybe so but once you were

there you certainly enjoyed it

It matters so much to you that I enjoyed
it.

Because you forgot about me.

It was supposed to be my big shining
moment.

And everyone was shoving me aside.

You didn't even care.

It's like I didn't exist.

Honey, I didn't realize I hurt you.

You were too busy with your makeup and
your lines and your penguin friends.

You didn't have time for me.

I always have time for you.

I'm a mother first and a penguin lady
second.

Don't tell your father.

Why did you do it, Mom?

You knew how important it was to me.

I don't know.

I guess I got carried away.

Well, the fuss or that attention was
flattering.

I guess I just didn't stop to consider
your feelings.

Everyone else has something they're good
at.

I just wanted to be good at something,
too.

Honey, you're good at lots of things.

They're not the things that anyone
thinks are important.

Maybe that different things are
important to you, but it shouldn't make

less valuable.

Why does everyone always make fun of the
things that I like?

If that's what's happening, I'm so
sorry.

We should be much more aware of your
feelings.

Especially me.

I should apologize, too.

It's pretty childish of me to ruin your
commercial.

You were good, too.

I would have been good, too, though.

I mean, I have everyone's lines
memorized.

Even Sir Penguin's.

You did?

I was tied up at work.

Traffic was awful.

How am I supposed to cook an impressive
meal for eight important friends in 20

minutes?

What about the proper penguin?

Well, thank you, Sir Penguin.

Well, hey, how'd the filming go?

Okay.

Just okay, and you're hugging like that?

Dad bowls a 200 game. You don't see me
slobbering all over him?

No, but you did spike the bowling ball.

So, Mom, when's the next assignment?

Uh, I'm not good at any more modeling.

What? I thought you said it went okay.

Did they make you eat that penguin food?

Mom, you can't get a hold of yourself.
We're talking about a lot of money here.

Some things are more important than
money.

Name one.

Hello? Oh, hello, Ed.

Yes, well, thank you, but I'm really not
interested in doing any more modeling,

but maybe my daughter is. She happens to
be right here.

Now, hold it. Just be relaxed.

Calm down. Be yourself.

Bonjour, Edouard.

Sit, Ubu, sit.

Good dog.