All language subtitles for The Cosby Show s05e08 Cyranoise de Bergington

Yeah? Dr. Huxtable, there's a young
woman here with a business proposition.

She says her name is Rudy Huxtable.

I don't know anybody by that name.

Come on, Daddy, it's me!

Who's me?

Your daughter!

Which one?

Rudy! Oh, Rudy, come in, come in!

I found the perfect birthday present for
Mom.

Your mother's birthday is two months
away, honey. But I found this article

today. And I have to send the money
right away.

Right away.

But I have some of the money, and I need
you to help me with the rest.

Now, how much does it cost?

$32 .80.

And how much do you have?

$1 .75.

So you're coming to me and asking me to
give you $31.

And five cents?

Right. And here's what I'm buying. Mom.

That. Okay.

Show her that you love her forever.
Beautiful 14 -carat gold heart

-shaped pendant includes diamond -like
stone.

Uh -huh.

It's a small print down here.

14 karat gold refers to gold plating.

The pendant should not be worn in water
or extreme

sunlight. Dad, it's six to eight weeks
for delivery.

I have to send the money right now,
today.

But $31 .05 is a lot of money, dear.

I'll work for it. I'll do chores around
the house, whatever you want me to do.

You'll do whatever I ask you to do?

Yes. But you have to promise not to tell
Mom where I got the money.

All right, now, there's just one thing I
don't understand.

What?

How come that you are already two months
ahead of

your mother's birthday and you're going
around willing to work hard and pay off

money that you don't have? You
understand?

On the evening of my birthday, 8 o
'clock at night, you're walking around

looking at me, Daddy, I didn't know it
was your birthday.

I'm sorry I didn't get a present, but I
love you.

and everything that it would be. Like I
told you, we're in college now. We can

go where the college women are.

Hey. Hey, how are you? What's up, man?
Hey, Denny.

Denny, this is my friend Julia.

Nice to meet you. Hi, Julia.

How are you, Theo?

I'm fine.

I mean, good. I'm fine and good.

All right, I'll see you at the library
tonight.

All right, I'll be there. Good luck on
your chem test.

See you, Denny. All right.

Looks like things are still going good
between you two. Yeah, they are.

Considering the change in our
relationship, a few days ago, Julia and

we should stop being involved
romantically.

You broke up with Julia?

It wasn't easy, but we were too wrapped
up in each other. It took time away from

our studies.

Man, that was a very mature thing to do.
I admire you for your academic

dedication. You do?

Yeah. Do you admire me, or are you
excited to find that Julia is free to

other guys?

Hey, what's that supposed to mean?

You're one of my best friends. I have no
interest in dating a girl you just

broke up with.

Huge lie.

Theo, it's okay. I know how you feel
about Julia.

Hey, I don't mind if you go out with
her. You don't? Hey!

Uh, would Julia mind?

Why, man, I can't do everything for you.
You're asking yourself.

I gotta go.

I've got French lit.

Bonsoir.

Bonsoir.

Did you see what he said?

Julia is free to date other guys. That
other guy could be me.

What about Justine?

Oh, Justine. Yeah, you remember your
girlfriend.

She's angry at me. She won't even speak
to me. She says whenever we go out, I'm

always looking at other girls. I told
her it's just my eyes roaming, nothing

else. She doesn't want to hear it. So
you're going to ask Julia out?

I'd like to.

I just wish I knew if she was interested
in me.

It would give me more confidence when I
call her.

Yeah, it did.

Would you talk to her for me? Oh, no
way. Oh, come on, man. Why not? I fall

apart around women like Julia. I'm not
asking you to get me the date. Just find

out what she thinks of me.

Theo, you don't know what happens to me
around beautiful women.

I get all sweaty.

My mouth dries out.

Theo, little pieces of white foam fly
out.

There's nothing to be nervous about.
You're not speaking for yourself. You're

speaking for me.

And whatever you do, don't bring up
Justine.

I'm going to be so nervous I'm not even
going to remember my own name.

Thanks, man.

Okay, Dad.

Finish cleaning out the refrigerator.

All right. Now, did you take the shelves
out, wipe them down, took out all the

drawers, cleaned it, got up in the
corners?

Even the butter dish.

My girl.

I'm going to mail the check now.

And remember, Mom can't know anything
about this. It's a big secret.

She'll not be the wiser.

All right.

Hey,

Rudy!

Rudy! Yeah, Dad? Now, what is this?

What do you mean, what? Look at this.
Food is out rotting. Ice cubes are

melting, honey. I thought I told you to
clean the thing out.

I did clean that. You said to clean it
out. So I cleaned it out. I took

everything out. I cleaned it out.

Look, clean out the refrigerator means
clean it out and also put the stuff

Oh, man.

Look, you and I made a verbal agreement.
I signed the check, right? So you do

the work. Okay.

You can mumble under your breath all you
want, but you better not say the wrong

thing.

What are you doing?

I just cleaned out the refrigerator. I'm
putting everything back in.

What are you doing in the refrigerator
by yourself?

would be industrious enough to do
something like this on their own.

Yeah, but dear, see, I want... And I'm
talking about a good job, too. Cliff,

look what this baby has done.

When I come back from the dry fields,
I'm going to have a special treat just

you all.

I'll see you later.

Bye -bye. Bye -bye.

That's my baby.

Come on in. All right.

Take your coat off.

Now tell me, what happened?

Can I sit down? Sure. Come on, have a
seat.

Sit down.

So?

Okay, I waited for her outside the
library. I was there for an hour and a

I went over and over what you told me to
tell her. All right, good, good. I saw

her come out. My mind blanked out. My
legs were even made of straw.

Then you started telling her about me. I
pulled myself together, and I managed

to get out the words. I told her that
you were sad about the breakup between

and Howard, that you were very
intelligent, sensitive, loyal, kind,

clean, and even reverent. Danny, that's
from the Boy Scout oath.

She thought it was funny. So that broke
the ice, and we started talking.

What'd she say?

She asked me out.

She asked you out? Yeah.

You can't be serious.

Why wouldn't Julia ask me out?

Damn, she's not your type.

What are you trying to say? I'm not the
man that you are?

You said it. I didn't.

Was that a crack about my weight?
Because let me tell you something. I

be big boned. I can lose this weight if
I want to.

Well, maybe if you spend a little more
time dieting and a little less time

after your best friend's girl. I didn't
go after your girl. Yeah, right, pal.

You had this planned from the beginning.
You have, Justine. How many other women

do you want? I want Julia. I've got her.
You got her because you're a two -faced

worm. Well, I'm a two -faced worm who's
going to have a beautiful woman on his

arm.

Okay.

All right.

You have a choice. You decide.

One day with Julia or a lifetime
friendship with me.

I'm sorry, Theo.

It's been nice.

Okay, maybe the other chore was a little
too difficult. Now, what I want you to

do here is I want you to just clean up
your room.

Which part?

The whole room.

The whole room? Yeah, when you say clean
up the whole room, clean up means the

whole room, okay?

Oh, man, that's a lot for $31.

Listen, you should be paying me $31 a
minute to live here.

Now, I want you to go ahead and clean up
this room. I'll be back in an hour, all

right?

And let me tell you something else.

I don't want to hear...

Every time somebody asks you to do
something.

Okay, now, hit it.

31 lousy parts.

What?

What did you say?

Nothing. I thought I was...

Show me the paper you got the D on.

School's fine, Dad.

Are the police coming?

Girl. I want to transfer out of NYU and
go to school someplace upstate.

Why? Julia.

Julia? You mean Justine. No, I mean
Julia.

Julia? Actually, it's Denny.

Denny? You see, Howard and Julia broke
up, and he gave me the go -ahead to ask

her out. I felt a little bit...
uncomfortable approaching her, so I

to go talk to her for me. I don't know
what he said to her, Dad, but she seemed

to be so charmed by him, she asked him
out.

Him.

Him, Dad.

She asked him out. She asked him out.
Asked him out. Dad, the man stabbed me

the back.

Well, looks like to me you handed him
the knife.

I'm devastated by this.

I couldn't sleep last night. I can't
study.

Dad, I can't get Julia off my mind. My
whole college career is at stake here.

Pardon me, but just a couple of days
ago, you were walking around, Justine,

Justine, my life, my sky, my valley, my
river.

I mean, it was just last week, son, that
I caught the two of you going upstairs.

Said you were going to study, but you
had no books.

Things have changed.

Those used to be my feelings for
Justine. Well, see, that's what I don't

understand. I mean, I don't understand
how you can fill up your heart with

Justine and then just empty it out and
then fill it up with Julia.

I don't understand. You must have two
hearts. You must have two hearts.

Dad, you're making jokes about something
that's very painful.

Well, I'm sorry.

My best friend Denny is going out with
the woman I want to go with.

What if they start going together?

Then they get married.

Then I get married.

Then Denny and Judy get divorced, but
I'm still married. I'm stuck.

My marriage is jeopardized, Dad.

My wife is going to find out that I'm
secretly in love with another woman.

am I going to do? Should I tell her
about this or what?

But what about the children?

What? I'm sorry, but you have lost your
mind.

Okay, how's it going in here?

I don't know.

All right, well, let's take a look.

Okay, now, what's all this stuff on the
floor in the closet?

Winter stuff?

Winter stuff, okay.

Why is it on the floor, dear? You're
supposed to hang this up, you know? Huh?

Not cold yet.

Wait a minute, it's not cold yet.

You know, I left you here, said I'd be
back in an hour, and this room is almost

as messy as when I left. I'm tired.

You're tired?

Oh, well, I'm sorry to hear that. You
know, you were tired when you had to

up the kitchen. You were tired when you
had to do this room. But you were not

tired when you came and asked me for $31
.05.

Remember that?

Huh?

Yes.

Okay, now look at this bed. See?

What is this?

What's wrong with this bed? All you have
to do is just pull up on this. Like I

showed you a long time ago. You pull.

Snap. And then you smooth out. Come on,
do that. You can do it. All right. Oh,

you look at little Miss House Helper
here.

Yesterday was the refrigerator, and
today she's been up in her room like a

little bee.

When I came in here before Cliff, Rudy
was cleaning out that closet like there

was no tomorrow.

Look at this.

Yeah, well, dear, see, I...

Rudy, you too much.

I tried very hard, Mommy, even though I
was tired.

And I am very proud of you. I think you
deserve a reward. So I'm going to give

you two dollars.

Thanks, Mom. You're welcome. I'm going
to the office. I'll see you later. Uh

-huh.

work to do here you understand now i'm
leaving here and i will be back for

captain's inspection at approximately
1800 hours or for you 6 p .m

this is going to look very cruel but
it's a part of life

Julia doesn't want to have anything to
do with me. And when Justine finds out,

she's going to be even angrier.

Sometimes in the heat of battle, you
suffer defeat. You just lost the Alamo

Guam.

I'm finished.

I'm waving the white flag to every woman
I know.

I don't need them.

I don't need love.

Dad, all this time, I could have been
studying.

From now on, all I'm going to do is
study.

Be whatever I'm going to be.

Whatever that is.

I'll tell you the truth.

They have a saying that a cat has nine
lives.

I think you have nine hearts.

I'm willing to bet, my boy, that if we
go down on that NYU campus, you would

find a woman to fill that third heart.

It's hopeless.

Well, it looks like I'm going to have to
take matters into my own hands. Come

on, I'll buy you a cappuccino.

You're not going to try to help me find
a girl, are you?

No, let's look at it this way. You're
wounded.

Don't see me as your father. Look at me
as the Red Cross.

I'm a married man myself.

25 years.

So don't even try it.

See the young man over there?

He's my son.

He's cute.

Well, he's available.

Just rebounding from an almost affair.

He has a lot of hearts.

You could be in one of them.

I'm involved.

That doesn't bother him.

Well, could you go get her and bring her
here?

She's in Boston visiting her parents.

We'll wait.

Listen, if you think I'm funny, he's
hysterical. He'll keep you hysterical

day. Well, listen, I'm not really all
that involved.

I guess it wouldn't hurt to meet your
son.

Really? How nice of you. Step right over
here.

Son, listen, I want you to meet, this is
my closest friend.

Sheila. Sheila.

Sheila. Yeah, Sheila.

I'm Theo.

I'm real sorry about this. What? It's
okay. I've never had a guy introduce

himself to me like this.

I hope you're okay.

See, I've been on the rebound myself.

So if you need to talk about this, I'm
here.

Listen, I know you're in pain.

But if you cried, you'd feel so much
better.

Most men are ashamed to cry, but I can
tell you're not one of those. So come

cry. Cry!

Rudy Huxtable, are you ready

for Captain's inspection?

Yes, sir!

Here to hop, haunt hay, haunt sin, haunt

hat, swap!

This will be the high -level mark.

I will not inspect anything above this
mark.

Foot here!

All right, now we will begin.

to something known as Under the
Lampshade.

Go ahead and check that.

Okay,

okay.

I've held a lot of inspections.

One place I know.

It's in the child's ears.

You've done a wonderful job. I'm proud
of you.

Now you've earned all of the money. I'm
proud of you. You understand that?

Thanks, Dad. All right. And I'm also
going to give you back the $2.

That's your mother's $2.

Thank you, Daddy. Thank you. Yes, yes,
yes. You're welcome, my dear.

I'm going to use this to buy your
birthday present.

or a studio.