All language subtitles for The Cosby Show s03e12 Cliff in Charge
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1
00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:07,510
Hey, there's Bill Cosby, listen to him!
2
00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,380
Hey. Cliff, I just got a letter from
Hillman College.
3
00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:20,980
Dear Claire, as you know, in June, Dr.
4
00:01:21,220 --> 00:01:25,260
Zachariah J. Haynes, president of
Hillman College, will be retiring after
5
00:01:25,260 --> 00:01:26,960
years of service to the school.
6
00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:30,640
Oh, you better watch it. That's going to
cost you some money.
7
00:01:31,340 --> 00:01:35,980
I don't think so. Listen to this. As a
distinguished graduate, we would like to
8
00:01:35,980 --> 00:01:39,880
invite you to serve on the executive
committee to plan a celebration in honor
9
00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:42,120
Dr. Haynes to be held graduation
weekend.
10
00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:44,560
Mm -hmm. Is that something? Yeah.
11
00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,580
Well, they want me down there a week
from Saturday for ten days.
12
00:01:48,620 --> 00:01:51,560
Dr. Haynes is a very, very special
person. Mm -hmm.
13
00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:54,580
What are you looking for?
14
00:01:54,940 --> 00:01:55,940
Looking for my letter.
15
00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:57,419
What letter?
16
00:01:57,420 --> 00:01:58,420
My letter from Hillman.
17
00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:00,140
You didn't get one.
18
00:02:01,860 --> 00:02:05,140
Well, uh, they probably meant that
letter for both of us, then.
19
00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:08,960
No, I don't think so, because here it
says, uh, Claire, give our regards to
20
00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:09,960
Cliff.
21
00:02:11,060 --> 00:02:12,260
Well, re -read it again.
22
00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:13,920
Read the letter again, please.
23
00:02:14,280 --> 00:02:20,040
Dear Claire, as a distinguished
graduate, we would like to invite you to
24
00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:23,680
on the executive committee to plan a
celebration in honor of Dr. Haynes to be
25
00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,980
held graduation weekend. Shall I go on?
I don't understand.
26
00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,020
I'm a distinguished graduate?
27
00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:33,740
Yeah, you were a distinguished graduate.
I was a good student.
28
00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:37,380
No, your mother's been talking about
visiting Denise. You think she'd like to
29
00:02:37,380 --> 00:02:38,159
with me?
30
00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:39,800
Yes, she'll enjoy that.
31
00:02:40,110 --> 00:02:45,250
Well, I'll give her a call. I don't
understand how they could leave out one
32
00:02:45,250 --> 00:02:51,650
the most distinguished students ever in
the
33
00:02:51,650 --> 00:02:58,430
history of the school. You know what?
They're probably sending
34
00:02:58,430 --> 00:03:03,170
me a special delivery letter asking me
to give the keynote address.
35
00:03:06,540 --> 00:03:10,020
Well, I don't think so, because it says
here that the incoming president will be
36
00:03:10,020 --> 00:03:10,679
doing that.
37
00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:16,640
I don't understand how they could leave
out probably the most distinguished
38
00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:22,600
graduate in all of Hellman. That's why
they did it. Because you were the most
39
00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:27,020
distinguished and the most loved, and
everybody would be looking at you, and
40
00:03:27,020 --> 00:03:28,500
they would just forget all about Dr.
41
00:03:28,740 --> 00:03:30,180
Hayes and his little 53 years.
42
00:03:44,880 --> 00:03:47,280
Are you laughing at me? Oh.
43
00:03:53,020 --> 00:03:57,000
Okay, okay, now just relax. There's no
need to panic.
44
00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,820
I know this is your first baby.
45
00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:05,480
Now, why don't you just sit down, take a
deep breath.
46
00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:07,440
Good.
47
00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:14,240
Okay. Now, tell me, how far apart...
48
00:04:14,830 --> 00:04:17,790
Are your wife's contractions, Mr.
Rowland?
49
00:04:20,750 --> 00:04:22,089
35 minutes?
50
00:04:23,810 --> 00:04:27,030
Well, it doesn't sound like she's in
labor.
51
00:04:27,690 --> 00:04:32,210
Well, no, no, no, don't be embarrassed.
Just call me when they're about seven or
52
00:04:32,210 --> 00:04:33,210
eight minutes apart.
53
00:04:34,710 --> 00:04:35,950
You're still nervous?
54
00:04:36,890 --> 00:04:41,890
Okay, why don't you now go to the
hospital?
55
00:04:42,860 --> 00:04:48,280
and your wife will call you when she's
seven, eight minutes apart, okay?
56
00:04:48,620 --> 00:04:51,120
All right. Talk to you later.
57
00:04:55,700 --> 00:04:57,300
And who are you?
58
00:04:57,640 --> 00:04:58,640
Your father.
59
00:04:59,780 --> 00:05:02,900
Can't be. My father ran away with the
circus when I was born.
60
00:05:03,100 --> 00:05:03,779
He's back.
61
00:05:03,780 --> 00:05:04,980
Oh, my goodness.
62
00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:08,020
Well, you don't smell like you've been
around elephants.
63
00:05:08,300 --> 00:05:09,300
Listen.
64
00:05:11,390 --> 00:05:13,070
What is all this stuff for?
65
00:05:13,630 --> 00:05:16,690
Well, since I'll be staying here while
Anna and Claire are at Hillman, I went
66
00:05:16,690 --> 00:05:17,690
the store and picked up some things.
67
00:05:17,890 --> 00:05:21,070
So, uh, Dad, we have oatmeal.
68
00:05:21,290 --> 00:05:24,370
You didn't have to buy it. Yeah, not
that kind. That's Norwegian oatmeal.
69
00:05:25,410 --> 00:05:26,990
Havregrat. Havre who?
70
00:05:28,450 --> 00:05:33,070
That's the oatmeal the Vikings ate.
Okay, that's fine. What is this, soap?
71
00:05:33,450 --> 00:05:34,750
Mm -hmm. Was it Viking soap?
72
00:05:34,970 --> 00:05:35,970
No, son.
73
00:05:36,050 --> 00:05:40,550
The Vikings never had soap. They just
jumped off the boats and swam in the
74
00:05:40,550 --> 00:05:41,550
fjords.
75
00:05:42,090 --> 00:05:43,090
What?
76
00:05:43,550 --> 00:05:44,850
Fjords. Fjords. Okay.
77
00:05:45,730 --> 00:05:49,150
Fjords. I have something I want to
discuss with you. Yes, sir. Now, I
78
00:05:49,150 --> 00:05:51,650
going to be staying with you for five
days, and I want you to know that I
79
00:05:51,650 --> 00:05:56,370
to pay my own way. Now, Dad. Don't talk
back. I've estimated how much it's going
80
00:05:56,370 --> 00:05:58,150
to cost you to have me here for a day.
81
00:05:58,510 --> 00:05:59,810
I made up a list.
82
00:06:00,150 --> 00:06:01,530
Yeah, but... Hush.
83
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,960
I have it down on paper. Food, hot
water, entertainment.
84
00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:08,380
Entertainment? When I watch the news on
television.
85
00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:14,120
Our TV's paid for. You don't have to put
a quarter in it anymore like old days.
86
00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:16,800
Please let me pay for my share of the
groceries.
87
00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:20,960
Take your hands out of your pocket. Your
money's no good here. I mean that.
88
00:06:21,180 --> 00:06:22,460
We'll talk about it later.
89
00:06:22,760 --> 00:06:26,660
Yeah, and that's another thing you do.
You say, we'll talk about it later. And
90
00:06:26,660 --> 00:06:28,420
that's only used to wear me down.
91
00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:30,100
We'll talk about that later, too.
92
00:06:36,099 --> 00:06:39,460
Hey. That's right. Just act like he's
the only one in the room.
93
00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:42,460
Just leave me sitting here. You don't
know.
94
00:06:42,840 --> 00:06:45,240
Hi, Daddy. Hi, Daddy. What's in the bag?
95
00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:49,000
Oh, some things that your granddad
brought home. That's true.
96
00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:54,820
But if I dig deep into this bag, I might
find something you children would love.
97
00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:56,480
Chocolate chip cookies!
98
00:06:56,820 --> 00:06:58,780
No, no, no, no, no. Can we have one?
99
00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:01,560
If it were up to me, I'd give you one.
But you have to ask your father.
100
00:07:01,820 --> 00:07:02,820
Can we have one?
101
00:07:05,930 --> 00:07:06,930
One, one. Thank you.
102
00:07:07,170 --> 00:07:08,170
You can have one.
103
00:07:08,370 --> 00:07:09,590
May I have one, please?
104
00:07:09,810 --> 00:07:12,510
I don't think so, son. At your age, this
turns right to fat.
105
00:07:18,330 --> 00:07:19,330
Hux for residence.
106
00:07:20,450 --> 00:07:21,450
Oh, hi, Mom.
107
00:07:22,210 --> 00:07:23,550
Oh, it's just a chocolate chip cookie.
108
00:07:24,810 --> 00:07:26,030
Well, Dad said I could.
109
00:07:29,130 --> 00:07:30,370
Mom wants to talk to you.
110
00:07:36,300 --> 00:07:37,259
Hi, dear.
111
00:07:37,260 --> 00:07:40,500
Huh? Yeah, yeah, I know it's close to
dinner.
112
00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:46,780
But... But... But... But...
113
00:07:46,780 --> 00:07:49,920
Claire says Mom wants to talk to you.
114
00:07:50,180 --> 00:07:51,180
Hello,
115
00:07:52,140 --> 00:07:53,140
Anna.
116
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:54,440
I miss you, too.
117
00:07:56,020 --> 00:07:58,980
Okay, I'll put him on again. Claire, if
your mother wants to talk to you.
118
00:08:00,920 --> 00:08:01,920
Hey, Mom.
119
00:08:02,840 --> 00:08:05,220
I know it's close to dinner, but...
120
00:08:08,300 --> 00:08:09,360
I brought the cookies here.
121
00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:12,680
Mom wants to talk to you.
122
00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:16,520
Hi, Alan.
123
00:08:17,420 --> 00:08:23,880
Yes, but... What a
124
00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:27,540
shame.
125
00:08:30,580 --> 00:08:31,399
What's wrong?
126
00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:32,400
Listen to this.
127
00:08:32,659 --> 00:08:35,679
Douglas B. Hopper, 85, passed away
yesterday.
128
00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:40,020
Survived by his wife, Eileen, and his
two sons, Oliver and Walter. It's a
129
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,360
Was he a friend of yours?
130
00:08:41,580 --> 00:08:43,120
No, I just read the obituaries.
131
00:08:45,140 --> 00:08:46,760
Do you do this often, Dad?
132
00:08:46,980 --> 00:08:47,980
Every day.
133
00:08:49,460 --> 00:08:52,820
Now, here's a guy who went only 52 years
old.
134
00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:54,560
I got him beat.
135
00:08:57,820 --> 00:09:00,640
He survived by his wife, his children,
his father.
136
00:09:01,900 --> 00:09:04,000
His mother survived by everybody.
137
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:07,720
52? Uh -huh.
138
00:09:07,940 --> 00:09:12,280
Oh, listen to this. It says he left the
bulk of his estate to his father.
139
00:09:15,260 --> 00:09:17,060
Must have been a nice boy.
140
00:09:17,340 --> 00:09:18,340
Yeah.
141
00:09:18,380 --> 00:09:19,780
I bet he's in heaven.
142
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:32,560
is not home yet. He's at wrestling
practice.
143
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:38,900
Well, young lady, may I take a message?
144
00:09:45,180 --> 00:09:47,400
The young lady called up for Theo.
145
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:54,260
I said, can I take a message? She just
went... Well,
146
00:09:54,900 --> 00:09:56,920
when you were down in your office, a
couple of ladies called.
147
00:09:57,870 --> 00:10:03,090
Wouldn't leave their names. One of the
girls said, um, tell Theo he's a doll.
148
00:10:05,950 --> 00:10:08,950
Hey, Grandpa. Hey, Dad. Hey, son. Theo,
how was wrestling practice?
149
00:10:09,230 --> 00:10:11,670
Okay. Grandfather took some calls for
you.
150
00:10:11,870 --> 00:10:12,870
He has a message.
151
00:10:13,070 --> 00:10:15,510
Really? What is it? Theo, you're a doll.
152
00:10:19,630 --> 00:10:20,630
That's what she said.
153
00:10:20,950 --> 00:10:21,950
She? Who?
154
00:10:22,190 --> 00:10:23,190
She wouldn't tell me.
155
00:10:23,470 --> 00:10:26,390
Well, are you sure it was a she?
Definitely. I know my she's.
156
00:10:26,920 --> 00:10:32,500
Yes, yes, you have been getting quite a
few calls and have been girls who've
157
00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:36,220
just been giggling, teething, and then
hanging up the phone.
158
00:10:36,540 --> 00:10:40,500
Are you guys teasing me? Would we tease
about something as serious as this?
159
00:10:40,900 --> 00:10:41,900
Yeah.
160
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:44,840
Well, we're not doing it this time.
161
00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:49,540
You know, this is strange, because all
day -to -day girls were smiling at me
162
00:10:49,540 --> 00:10:51,960
giggling and waving and giving me the
eye.
163
00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:57,320
And when I asked them what was wrong,
they said, I heard about you.
164
00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:03,500
Something strange is definitely going
on. Well, maybe not, Theo. It could be
165
00:11:03,500 --> 00:11:05,840
you're finally turning into a Huxtable
Man.
166
00:11:06,200 --> 00:11:07,200
There you go.
167
00:11:07,460 --> 00:11:11,420
The caterpillar turning into the
butterfly.
168
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:14,800
A miracle of nature.
169
00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:16,420
What are you guys talking about?
170
00:11:16,680 --> 00:11:23,200
See, what happens is Huxtable Men, all
of a sudden, they blossom and they
171
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:25,540
become irresistible.
172
00:11:25,980 --> 00:11:28,040
To the female of the species.
173
00:11:31,680 --> 00:11:33,840
Well, how come you never told me this
was going to happen?
174
00:11:34,180 --> 00:11:36,220
Because I didn't think you could handle
it.
175
00:11:39,360 --> 00:11:40,360
I'll get it.
176
00:11:42,040 --> 00:11:43,040
Huxwell residence.
177
00:11:43,660 --> 00:11:44,660
Speaking.
178
00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:47,280
I am?
179
00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:51,200
Well, who is this?
180
00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:53,820
Okay, at least give me your initials.
181
00:11:54,810 --> 00:11:56,270
Well, can you tell me what homeroom
you're in?
182
00:11:57,850 --> 00:12:01,250
203. Hey, that's a great homeroom. Uh,
what row do you sit in?
183
00:12:02,170 --> 00:12:03,170
Hello?
184
00:12:06,490 --> 00:12:08,090
Dad, you were wrong.
185
00:12:08,690 --> 00:12:10,610
I can handle it. You can?
186
00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:32,080
Such a shame.
187
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:33,620
Did somebody else die?
188
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:34,840
No.
189
00:12:35,140 --> 00:12:36,200
It's these pencils.
190
00:12:36,940 --> 00:12:38,660
Look at them. They're all chewed up.
191
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:41,000
Claire.
192
00:12:42,820 --> 00:12:44,960
I recognize these teeth marks.
193
00:12:45,420 --> 00:12:48,840
You've been doing this ever since you
were a first grader. Yeah, well, I can't
194
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:49,779
help myself.
195
00:12:49,780 --> 00:12:51,740
Son, this is a sign of high anxiety.
196
00:12:52,140 --> 00:12:56,600
This desk is just full of chewed
pencils. Well, that's the spot where I
197
00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:57,660
bills. Well,
198
00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:00,120
I'll buy you a strip of rawhide.
199
00:13:00,560 --> 00:13:06,980
No, I will buy you an ice -cold glass of
papaya. Ooh, I love papaya juice. Did
200
00:13:06,980 --> 00:13:11,360
you know that it's very high in vitamin
A and C? Yes, I knew that. Did you know
201
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:14,840
that the Inca Indians used the papaya
for medicinal purposes?
202
00:13:15,180 --> 00:13:20,400
Yes, I knew that. It also contains a
very effective digestive enzyme. Do you
203
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,100
know what the name of the enzyme is?
204
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:23,400
Yes, I do.
205
00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:27,320
Haparpepsininpinamine.
206
00:13:28,980 --> 00:13:32,560
Anxiety is papain, spelled like it
sounds. P -A -P -A -I -N.
207
00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:39,080
Aha. So why don't you come sit over here
and get a nice cold glass of papain.
208
00:13:39,260 --> 00:13:42,280
Son, it's not my place to tell you how
to run a household, but you've got some
209
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:43,340
problems here in the cupboard.
210
00:13:43,560 --> 00:13:44,359
What do you mean?
211
00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:49,020
Your cereals, your flour, and your
sugar. All these boxes should be wrapped
212
00:13:49,020 --> 00:13:50,020
plastic bags.
213
00:13:50,060 --> 00:13:51,480
Why? Keeps out the ants.
214
00:13:51,740 --> 00:13:53,880
Dad, we don't have ants. Not yet.
215
00:13:54,140 --> 00:13:56,380
All it takes is one, the scout ant.
216
00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:00,620
Come on, the Scout Ant.
217
00:14:00,820 --> 00:14:04,200
He's the one that all the ants send out
to find food. And if he sees that,
218
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:06,240
before you know it, you have a house
full of ants.
219
00:14:06,460 --> 00:14:10,960
Well, I just want to tell you that my
wife and I have been here for 20 years.
220
00:14:11,220 --> 00:14:12,220
No ants.
221
00:14:12,280 --> 00:14:13,580
Well, that's the way ants operate.
222
00:14:13,860 --> 00:14:15,580
They lull you into complacency.
223
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:19,260
Take on the Scout Ants now.
224
00:14:19,540 --> 00:14:20,920
Rudy, who's this?
225
00:14:21,340 --> 00:14:23,980
This is my friend Kenny. His name used
to be Bull.
226
00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:27,100
Nice to meet you, Kenny.
227
00:14:27,340 --> 00:14:29,000
Thank you. I have a grandpa, too.
228
00:14:29,220 --> 00:14:30,119
What's his name?
229
00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:31,120
Grandpa.
230
00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:35,240
If you're gonna go out and play, I want
you to put hats on, because it's cold
231
00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:35,919
out there.
232
00:14:35,920 --> 00:14:38,580
I didn't bring a hat. I'll get you one.
Come on.
233
00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:42,540
That looks like a happy team.
234
00:14:42,820 --> 00:14:47,120
Yeah, happy for about three minutes, and
then they'll be arguing again. No, I
235
00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:48,300
don't believe it. Not those two.
236
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:49,980
I hope you're right, but you're not.
237
00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:55,540
Here, wear this hat. It's Theo's.
238
00:14:55,980 --> 00:14:56,980
Okay, thanks.
239
00:14:57,020 --> 00:14:58,020
Let's go.
240
00:14:58,860 --> 00:15:01,140
Wait. I have to open the door for you.
241
00:15:01,340 --> 00:15:04,260
No, you don't. Yes, I do. I'm a man.
You're a woman.
242
00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:10,400
So, a man's supposed to open the door
for a woman. Who's that?
243
00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:11,640
My big brother.
244
00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:13,660
He's 19, and he knows everything.
245
00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:16,880
Well, Sasha says a woman can do
anything.
246
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:18,300
No.
247
00:15:18,780 --> 00:15:21,040
A woman can do it. Man says.
248
00:15:27,310 --> 00:15:28,330
Then you'll never get married.
249
00:15:28,550 --> 00:15:32,070
I will if I want to. Okay, but you'll
have to stay home and cook and wash
250
00:15:32,070 --> 00:15:33,070
clothes.
251
00:15:34,150 --> 00:15:36,870
Not all a woman can have any job she
wants.
252
00:15:37,150 --> 00:15:38,150
No, she can't.
253
00:15:39,290 --> 00:15:40,930
Give me back my hat, bud.
254
00:15:43,190 --> 00:15:47,050
My name's Kenny, bud. My name's Kenny,
bud.
255
00:15:47,310 --> 00:15:51,010
My name's Kenny. Stop it, stop, stop.
Now, what's the matter?
256
00:15:51,910 --> 00:15:53,490
He's not my friend anymore.
257
00:15:54,050 --> 00:15:55,890
Yes, I am. No, you're not.
258
00:15:56,110 --> 00:15:58,340
Yes, I am. No, no, no, stop, stop, Ed.
259
00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:02,680
Now, what is the matter?
260
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,140
He tried to open the door for me.
261
00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:07,320
Oh, okay, okay.
262
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:08,980
I'm supposed to. I'm a man.
263
00:16:09,240 --> 00:16:11,320
Wait, wait, just one second.
264
00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:13,460
Now, look, Alvin.
265
00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:14,720
Who?
266
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:18,200
No, no, no, not you. You're Kenny.
267
00:16:18,860 --> 00:16:19,860
All right, Kenny.
268
00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:25,800
If the two of you want to act like a man
and a woman, then if you're going to
269
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:29,380
discuss things, you have differences,
you do it politely. You understand?
270
00:16:30,540 --> 00:16:32,400
Yeah. All right, fine.
271
00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:38,520
Now, I am going to open the door for
both of you. Not because I'm a man, but
272
00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:41,500
because I'm a tired adult and I'm
throwing you out.
273
00:16:46,830 --> 00:16:48,730
I must say, son, you handled that well.
274
00:16:49,070 --> 00:16:51,410
Well, thank you, Dad. I had a good
teacher.
275
00:16:53,070 --> 00:16:54,950
Hi. Hey, Dad.
276
00:16:55,190 --> 00:16:56,350
You have to sign that.
277
00:16:57,130 --> 00:16:59,390
Really? What is it? A note from our
principal.
278
00:17:01,030 --> 00:17:02,470
Why do you have a note from the
principal?
279
00:17:02,810 --> 00:17:05,150
Well, I found out why I've been getting
all the phone calls.
280
00:17:05,390 --> 00:17:08,010
The girls at school picked me a
thoroughbred of the week.
281
00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:09,250
All right.
282
00:17:09,510 --> 00:17:10,970
Thoroughbred? Yeah, you know, a winner.
283
00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:14,500
You see, every week the girls pick a guy
in the junior class, and they put his
284
00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:16,760
name and phone number on the wall of the
girls' washroom.
285
00:17:17,060 --> 00:17:19,079
So why do I have a note from the
principal?
286
00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:21,839
Well, when I found out about it, I
waited until after school.
287
00:17:22,079 --> 00:17:25,520
And then I went into the girls'
washroom, and I started scribbling over
288
00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:26,358
and number.
289
00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:28,600
That's when the principal, Ms. Walker,
came in and caught me.
290
00:17:29,780 --> 00:17:32,480
She said you have to sign that as proof
that I told you about it.
291
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:35,200
Well,
292
00:17:36,060 --> 00:17:37,220
you've told me about it.
293
00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:38,500
And I'm signing.
294
00:17:38,980 --> 00:17:40,020
Thanks a lot, Dad.
295
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:41,240
You're welcome.
296
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:47,480
You know, son, it seems like raising
children is a lot more difficult now
297
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:48,480
when I was raising you.
298
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:51,960
Well, I wish you'd have thought about
that when you put the curse on me and
299
00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:55,880
said, I hope you have some children who
act exactly the same way that you act.
300
00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:58,239
I know.
301
00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:00,300
And things are working out better than I
expected.
302
00:18:18,120 --> 00:18:19,800
Scillis is ready to have her baby.
303
00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:22,340
I have to go over to the hospital now.
304
00:18:22,860 --> 00:18:24,060
What time is it?
305
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:28,280
2 .15 a .m. So why don't you come on and
sleep in my bed?
306
00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:32,500
I'd like to, but I don't think I can get
out from under Rudy.
307
00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:34,220
I'll show you how to do this.
308
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:43,980
How'd you get in here anyway?
309
00:18:44,340 --> 00:18:48,220
Rudy couldn't sleep, so I told her the
story of Hugo the Bear and the Lost
310
00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:53,340
Really? I wish you'd told me you were
going to do that. That's my favorite
311
00:18:53,340 --> 00:18:54,900
story. I'd come up and listen.
312
00:18:55,320 --> 00:19:00,740
Oh, but you get so excited every time I
tell that story, and I was afraid you'd
313
00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:02,700
make so much noise you'd keep Rudy up.
314
00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:03,920
I understand.
315
00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:05,500
I'll see you in the morning.
316
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:07,179
Night, son.
317
00:19:07,180 --> 00:19:08,180
Good night, Dad.
318
00:19:16,270 --> 00:19:17,049
Hey, Dad.
319
00:19:17,050 --> 00:19:19,650
Oh, it's almost 11 o 'clock. Have you
been up all this time?
320
00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:27,110
Yes, Mrs. Gillis finally delivered the
baby. I'm telling you, that child came
321
00:19:27,110 --> 00:19:33,870
right there and stopped and stared at me
like this.
322
00:19:36,290 --> 00:19:39,050
How would you like a big steaming bowl
of hobbler grits?
323
00:19:39,390 --> 00:19:42,010
Well, Dad, I don't think I want any
hobbler grits.
324
00:19:42,770 --> 00:19:44,930
I'm just so tired.
325
00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:47,760
I'm going to go in here and take a
little nap.
326
00:19:47,980 --> 00:19:48,980
Thank you.
327
00:19:51,140 --> 00:19:53,100
I think you should go upstairs to bed.
328
00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:54,820
No, I can't.
329
00:19:55,500 --> 00:19:57,160
Mrs. Rowland's ready to deliver.
330
00:19:57,740 --> 00:20:02,480
Her labor pains are 15 minutes apart,
and her husband's are seven minutes
331
00:20:03,740 --> 00:20:06,360
Oh, you'll close your eyes and get some
rest.
332
00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:07,580
Well, thank you.
333
00:20:09,580 --> 00:20:10,459
We're back.
334
00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:11,399
Let's go, Dash.
335
00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:13,940
Your father's just got back from the
hospital, and he may have to go back.
336
00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:15,400
He needs his rest.
337
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:17,200
But he promised he would take us to buy
some jeans.
338
00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:18,840
Well, I think you're going to have to
forget that.
339
00:20:19,140 --> 00:20:22,220
But, Granddad, we came all the way back
from the record store for this.
340
00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:26,120
When I was your age, every Saturday, my
father expected me to go out into the
341
00:20:26,120 --> 00:20:30,800
backyard and shop wood all day long
until there was enough to heat the house
342
00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:31,800
entire week.
343
00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:38,220
Grandpa, they don't understand what
you're trying to tell us. I'm trying to
344
00:20:38,220 --> 00:20:40,060
you the children should help their
parents more.
345
00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:43,020
But, Granddad, we only have one tree in
the backyard.
346
00:20:44,170 --> 00:20:47,390
My mom planted it, and she would get
real upset if we hit it with an ax.
347
00:20:49,030 --> 00:20:52,290
Well, the kitchen floor could use a good
scrubbing and waxing, or you could do
348
00:20:52,290 --> 00:20:53,410
your homework. Which would it be?
349
00:20:54,750 --> 00:20:55,750
Homework. Definitely.
350
00:20:56,170 --> 00:20:57,170
Good choice.
351
00:21:03,850 --> 00:21:05,430
Thank you.
352
00:21:05,910 --> 00:21:07,370
Thank you. Sleep, sleep, sleep.
353
00:21:08,250 --> 00:21:12,670
You know, I never realized how much
activity there is in this house.
354
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:15,360
And you do a fine job with it.
355
00:21:15,720 --> 00:21:16,720
Oh, thank you.
356
00:21:16,780 --> 00:21:21,000
I mean, I've told you many times that I
love you, but I've never told you I'm
357
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:22,000
proud of you.
358
00:21:22,740 --> 00:21:23,740
And I am?
359
00:21:25,040 --> 00:21:26,040
You're all right.
360
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:28,520
Oh, so are you.
361
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:33,220
Would you do me a favor?
362
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:34,500
You name it.
363
00:21:34,540 --> 00:21:39,820
Would you tell me the story about the
bear?
364
00:21:40,540 --> 00:21:41,680
Wouldn't you rather sleep?
365
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:43,000
No.
366
00:21:43,530 --> 00:21:50,510
Once upon a time, in the woods of a
magic kingdom, there lived a bear named
367
00:21:50,510 --> 00:21:51,510
Hugo.
368
00:21:51,970 --> 00:21:54,530
He was a very sad bear.
369
00:21:54,810 --> 00:22:01,730
One day, after having a picnic all by
himself, he was walking home to his cave
370
00:22:01,730 --> 00:22:05,930
when he saw a wolf who looked very
confused.
371
00:22:06,430 --> 00:22:08,070
Was the wolf lost?
372
00:22:08,750 --> 00:22:09,750
Yes, he was.
373
00:22:10,010 --> 00:22:12,170
And was the wolf's name Hans?
374
00:22:12,990 --> 00:22:14,150
That's right, Cliffy.
375
00:22:16,610 --> 00:22:17,610
I'll get it.
376
00:22:19,090 --> 00:22:20,090
Hello?
377
00:22:20,470 --> 00:22:21,470
Hello,
378
00:22:22,850 --> 00:22:23,850
son. You rest.
379
00:22:25,630 --> 00:22:26,630
Occidental residence.
380
00:22:27,070 --> 00:22:28,070
Uh -huh.
381
00:22:28,770 --> 00:22:30,350
How far apart are they?
382
00:22:31,310 --> 00:22:32,830
Son, it's Mrs. Rowland.
383
00:22:33,050 --> 00:22:34,050
Yeah.
384
00:22:34,910 --> 00:22:36,110
Hello, Mrs. Rowland.
385
00:22:37,590 --> 00:22:38,610
Oh, they are, huh?
386
00:22:39,130 --> 00:22:40,130
All right.
387
00:22:40,310 --> 00:22:41,310
This is it.
388
00:22:42,050 --> 00:22:43,570
I'm on my way over.
389
00:22:44,050 --> 00:22:45,570
Okay. Bye -bye.
390
00:22:46,570 --> 00:22:48,690
There you go. You have to go to the
hospital.
391
00:22:48,970 --> 00:22:49,970
Yes, sir.
392
00:22:50,770 --> 00:22:52,410
Isn't there something I could do for
you?
393
00:22:52,650 --> 00:22:54,710
Yeah, you could go over there and
deliver the baby.
394
00:22:56,030 --> 00:22:58,810
How about if I just give you a ride?
395
00:22:59,230 --> 00:23:00,850
Yes, that would be fine.
396
00:23:01,210 --> 00:23:02,970
On the way, I'll finish the story.
397
00:23:03,330 --> 00:23:04,590
Good. I'd love that.
398
00:23:04,950 --> 00:23:06,270
Now, where was I?
399
00:23:06,850 --> 00:23:12,890
Well... The bear had just finished
having his picnic, and he saw Hans, and
400
00:23:12,890 --> 00:23:13,890
was confused.
401
00:23:14,270 --> 00:23:20,570
Okay. Anyway, the reason Hans the wolf
was confused was because he was lost.
402
00:23:20,810 --> 00:23:23,230
Yes. Which made him feel very lonely,
too.
403
00:23:23,570 --> 00:23:27,710
Yes. And do you think that Hans and Hugo
will become friends?
404
00:23:28,170 --> 00:23:29,170
Now, son, be patient.
405
00:23:29,290 --> 00:23:30,930
I'm going to get to that. Okay.
406
00:23:31,210 --> 00:23:32,210
Okay. Anyway.
407
00:23:32,310 --> 00:23:35,470
Yeah. Hugo went over to Hans, and he
said...
408
00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:37,640
What's wrong, my friend?
409
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,100
Yeah. You look confused.
410
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:45,400
And Hans said, Oh, Mr. Bear, I'm so
lost.
411
00:23:45,820 --> 00:23:51,100
That's right, Clem. And Hugo said, I
have never seen anybody walking down the
412
00:23:51,100 --> 00:23:52,100
street.
413
00:24:29,610 --> 00:24:32,390
The Cosby Show is taped before studio
audio.
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