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1
00:00:05,221 --> 00:00:07,380
[intro music]
2
00:00:07,460 --> 00:00:12,061
[imitates train] Tickets this way
for the Chatsworth Express!
3
00:00:12,141 --> 00:00:16,341
Come and watch pikeys
making a mess of the lives
4
00:00:16,421 --> 00:00:19,541
they were given by him upstairs.
5
00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:23,021
And kids they're convinced
aren't actually theirs.
6
00:00:23,101 --> 00:00:24,061
[shouts] Stay away!
7
00:00:24,140 --> 00:00:30,741
What sounds on earth could ever replace
kids needing money or wives in your face?
8
00:00:30,820 --> 00:00:33,900
Cos this, people reckon, and me included,
9
00:00:33,981 --> 00:00:38,301
is why pubs and drugs
were kindly invented,
10
00:00:38,381 --> 00:00:42,021
to calm us all down
and stop us going mental.
11
00:00:42,101 --> 00:00:46,501
These are Chatsworth Estate's
basic essentials.
12
00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:50,821
We are worth every penny
for grinding your axes.
13
00:00:50,900 --> 00:00:55,501
You shit on our heads,
but you pay the taxes.
14
00:00:55,580 --> 00:00:58,501
[all laughing]
15
00:00:58,580 --> 00:01:01,501
Imagine a Britain
without Chatsworth buccaneers
16
00:01:01,580 --> 00:01:04,381
who'd come on your face
for the price of a beer.
17
00:01:04,461 --> 00:01:07,821
Make poverty history, cheaper drugs now!
18
00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:12,101
Make poverty history, cheaper drugs now!
19
00:01:12,181 --> 00:01:13,861
[laughing]
20
00:01:13,941 --> 00:01:15,381
Scatter!
21
00:01:15,461 --> 00:01:16,741
Party!
22
00:01:20,181 --> 00:01:22,581
[music fades out]
23
00:01:28,901 --> 00:01:31,661
["Shut Up" by Black Eyed Peas playing]
24
00:01:37,341 --> 00:01:40,661
[Jamie] The two things my mum never
allowed us to do when we were nippers.
25
00:01:40,741 --> 00:01:43,941
Potholing, because she's claustrophobic,
26
00:01:44,021 --> 00:01:47,021
and riding a motorbike,
cos her cousin Shirley came off hers
27
00:01:47,101 --> 00:01:49,181
on the A-34 when she was 16.
28
00:01:49,261 --> 00:01:50,381
[Karen] Jamie!
29
00:01:50,461 --> 00:01:54,181
[Jamie] Broke her back in three places.
My old mate Kenny Morris had a Suzuki.
30
00:01:54,261 --> 00:01:55,981
[yells] Jamie!
31
00:01:56,060 --> 00:01:58,941
[Jamie] He used to try and make me ride
on the back, so he could spin me round
32
00:01:59,021 --> 00:02:01,261
at 90 miles an hour
and laugh at me bricking it.
33
00:02:01,341 --> 00:02:06,101
When I kept refusing, we ended up
falling out and he gave me a black eye.
34
00:02:06,181 --> 00:02:08,940
When I lied to my mum
about why he'd twatted me,
35
00:02:09,021 --> 00:02:11,581
my dad called me a wimp
for not giving him one back.
36
00:02:12,581 --> 00:02:14,141
Early lesson in being a Maguire.
37
00:02:15,181 --> 00:02:18,421
Sometimes, you just can't win.
38
00:02:18,501 --> 00:02:19,461
Where've you been?
39
00:02:19,540 --> 00:02:22,061
All this space. We're not capitalising.
40
00:02:22,141 --> 00:02:23,861
We are not making the best
of what we've got here.
41
00:02:25,301 --> 00:02:27,461
Hip And Thigh. Atkins. F-Plan.
42
00:02:27,540 --> 00:02:30,221
They made millions. Millions.
We should do summat here.
43
00:02:30,301 --> 00:02:32,341
-Here?
-Classes. We'd make a fortune.
44
00:02:32,421 --> 00:02:34,581
Better than spending 50 quid a month
in some sweaty gym
45
00:02:34,661 --> 00:02:36,941
and I will guarantee they'll love it.
46
00:02:37,861 --> 00:02:39,380
What do you think?
47
00:02:39,461 --> 00:02:41,181
You need your head testing.
48
00:02:41,260 --> 00:02:42,820
[ominous tone]
49
00:02:42,901 --> 00:02:45,181
See, that's why I love you, Jamie.
50
00:02:45,260 --> 00:02:49,181
[Karen] Your infectious enthusiasm
and zest for life!
51
00:02:52,741 --> 00:02:53,741
Please, Paddy.
52
00:02:53,820 --> 00:02:55,260
Please.
53
00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:57,581
Just a bit more time.
54
00:02:57,661 --> 00:02:59,501
-[Chesney] Leave her alone.
-Stay out of this.
55
00:02:59,581 --> 00:03:00,781
[Yvonne] Chesney, no!
56
00:03:03,421 --> 00:03:04,380
[door opens]
57
00:03:05,061 --> 00:03:06,501
What's going on?
58
00:03:08,061 --> 00:03:09,181
None of your business.
59
00:03:09,260 --> 00:03:11,100
Ches, please.
60
00:03:15,221 --> 00:03:17,901
Thursday. Every penny, understood?
61
00:03:23,181 --> 00:03:24,501
Understood?
62
00:03:28,540 --> 00:03:31,461
Ever need a job, Chesney, give us a call.
63
00:03:38,181 --> 00:03:41,021
[orchestra plays jaunty music]
64
00:04:12,260 --> 00:04:14,420
[coin drops]
65
00:04:17,141 --> 00:04:19,100
-Ah, sorry!
-Sorry!
66
00:04:28,740 --> 00:04:30,461
[girl] Holly... Holly!
67
00:04:42,981 --> 00:04:45,421
Aren't babies supposed
to ruin your figure?
68
00:04:45,500 --> 00:04:47,500
Oh, you can bang
on about overactive thyroid,
69
00:04:47,581 --> 00:04:49,661
big fucking bones
till you're blue in the face.
70
00:04:49,740 --> 00:04:51,180
Sit on your arse all day,
eat too many cakes,
71
00:04:51,261 --> 00:04:52,861
you are going to get fat. Simple.
72
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:55,341
Are you all right?
73
00:04:57,461 --> 00:04:58,821
I'll take that as a no, then?
74
00:04:59,740 --> 00:05:01,261
You've forgotten, haven't ya?
75
00:05:02,581 --> 00:05:03,541
What?
76
00:05:07,261 --> 00:05:08,341
What's the big deal?
77
00:05:09,821 --> 00:05:10,821
Mum and Dad?
78
00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:13,101
We arranged to go round.
79
00:05:13,180 --> 00:05:15,261
-We can still go now, can't we?
-In that state?
80
00:05:15,341 --> 00:05:16,381
You're shitfaced.
81
00:05:16,461 --> 00:05:18,301
Since when did you become my wife?
82
00:05:23,940 --> 00:05:25,261
Can I borrow some gel?
83
00:05:26,101 --> 00:05:27,060
Yeah.
84
00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:29,261
I'm sorry.
85
00:05:33,901 --> 00:05:35,341
Will you ever forgive me?
86
00:05:36,101 --> 00:05:37,461
-[Carl] Hmm?
-Will I do?
87
00:05:38,901 --> 00:05:40,141
Look, come on, babes.
88
00:05:40,221 --> 00:05:41,541
Leave it, Carl.
89
00:05:41,620 --> 00:05:43,421
What women say and what women mean
90
00:05:43,500 --> 00:05:45,500
are usually
two completely different things, Carl.
91
00:05:45,581 --> 00:05:47,101
Thought you'd know that by now.
92
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:48,901
I said no!
93
00:05:51,661 --> 00:05:54,661
You've got to learn
to attend to her needs, Carl.
94
00:05:54,740 --> 00:05:56,701
Even an 11-year-old can work that one out.
95
00:06:01,861 --> 00:06:03,301
Fancy a pint?
96
00:06:03,380 --> 00:06:04,781
Bit early, innit?
97
00:06:04,861 --> 00:06:05,940
Go on then, son.
98
00:06:06,021 --> 00:06:06,901
Fuck off.
99
00:06:08,821 --> 00:06:11,461
[burps] Slippery slope.
100
00:06:13,060 --> 00:06:15,060
[dramatic music]
101
00:06:17,101 --> 00:06:19,021
[Ian] Can't you just rearrange?
102
00:06:19,101 --> 00:06:20,261
Tell 'em he's not well.
103
00:06:20,341 --> 00:06:22,380
They're not gonna be that angry, are they?
104
00:06:24,141 --> 00:06:26,101
[Maxine sobs]
105
00:06:31,461 --> 00:06:32,421
Come here.
106
00:06:32,500 --> 00:06:35,101
[sobs]
107
00:06:49,901 --> 00:06:54,101
All right, Samson,
are you gonna fucking get it or what?
108
00:06:59,581 --> 00:07:01,940
-Oh, yeah!
-[creaking]
109
00:07:04,541 --> 00:07:06,021
[pants and huffs]
110
00:07:20,541 --> 00:07:21,981
[grunting]
111
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:22,981
[glass breaking]
112
00:07:23,060 --> 00:07:24,301
-[Stan grunts]
-[loud thump]
113
00:07:34,500 --> 00:07:35,341
Where's Connor?
114
00:07:38,661 --> 00:07:40,141
[Jamie] Karen!
115
00:07:40,221 --> 00:07:41,060
[Jamie] Connor?
116
00:07:42,341 --> 00:07:43,581
You said Mum had him.
117
00:07:45,301 --> 00:07:47,021
You said you were taking him out.
118
00:07:47,101 --> 00:07:48,541
No, I didn't!
119
00:07:50,740 --> 00:07:52,981
[Connor crying]
120
00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:54,141
She did.
121
00:08:01,901 --> 00:08:04,500
[sighing with relief] Oh, fuck... Hey.
122
00:08:07,260 --> 00:08:08,820
What's going on?
123
00:08:10,541 --> 00:08:12,541
-Nothing.
-You didn't know where he was!
124
00:08:12,620 --> 00:08:15,060
[Paddy] He's fine.
That's all that matters.
125
00:08:15,141 --> 00:08:16,861
[Mimi] Come on, sunshine.
126
00:08:17,740 --> 00:08:18,620
He's my sunshine.
127
00:08:25,700 --> 00:08:26,700
You don't trust me?
128
00:08:28,461 --> 00:08:30,981
[Paddy] Come on. Leave them in peace.
129
00:08:32,301 --> 00:08:34,060
You don't, do ya?
130
00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:47,220
[Connor grumbles]
131
00:09:11,061 --> 00:09:12,100
[Yvonne] Stan?
132
00:09:12,181 --> 00:09:13,301
[Yvonne gasps]
133
00:09:14,100 --> 00:09:15,181
It's all right.
134
00:09:17,100 --> 00:09:18,340
No, it isn't!
135
00:09:23,741 --> 00:09:25,181
Why do you have to pick on him?
136
00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:27,941
-What?
-It's got nothing to do with him!
137
00:09:28,021 --> 00:09:30,581
-Nothing to do with what?
-Don't give me that crap!
138
00:09:30,661 --> 00:09:33,340
-I borrowed the money, not him!
-Cool it, Yvonne.
139
00:09:33,421 --> 00:09:36,261
So, if you're going to smash anybody's
face in it should be mine, shouldn't it?
140
00:09:36,340 --> 00:09:39,141
-I don't know what you're on about.
-Stan. He's battered.
141
00:09:39,220 --> 00:09:40,701
That's got nothing to do with me.
142
00:09:41,661 --> 00:09:43,781
I just need a bit more time.
143
00:09:43,860 --> 00:09:46,141
48 hours. That's plenty.
144
00:10:01,061 --> 00:10:01,901
Plumber?
145
00:10:05,061 --> 00:10:06,181
[suggestive music]
146
00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:08,301
Leak?
147
00:10:10,061 --> 00:10:14,181
Plumber, leak! Yeah, right! [laughs]
148
00:10:33,220 --> 00:10:36,460
[man on TV] Which I inherited
some years ago and when I saw this...
149
00:10:36,541 --> 00:10:38,581
-[Karen] Woo! Come on, girls...
-[loud music plays]
150
00:10:46,181 --> 00:10:48,621
["Kids In America"
by Kim Wilde playing outside]
151
00:11:05,901 --> 00:11:08,141
My fitness empire starts here!
152
00:11:08,220 --> 00:11:10,941
You can spin yourself thin
with Karen Maguire!
153
00:11:18,740 --> 00:11:19,821
Whoo!
154
00:11:19,901 --> 00:11:20,860
Come on, girls!
155
00:11:35,701 --> 00:11:37,181
[Stella crying]
156
00:11:49,901 --> 00:11:50,980
[Carl giggles]
157
00:11:55,541 --> 00:11:56,621
What time you on till?
158
00:12:05,340 --> 00:12:06,941
[door slams]
159
00:12:07,021 --> 00:12:08,340
Things no better, then?
160
00:12:08,421 --> 00:12:10,821
She keeps cutting me out,
just blanking me.
161
00:12:10,901 --> 00:12:12,460
It's a lot to take on board, mate.
162
00:12:12,541 --> 00:12:15,100
What? A few pints
and I missed a dinner with the in-laws?
163
00:12:15,181 --> 00:12:16,860
Big fucking deal!
164
00:12:23,621 --> 00:12:25,021
[suspicious music]
165
00:12:51,901 --> 00:12:53,541
-[door opens]
-[male voices clamour]
166
00:12:54,781 --> 00:12:56,421
Do you have any money for charity?
167
00:12:56,501 --> 00:12:57,501
[coins clattering]
168
00:13:14,541 --> 00:13:17,340
-Hi!
-Hi.
169
00:13:17,421 --> 00:13:19,980
Wanna get the tram into town?
Get a burger or something?
170
00:13:20,061 --> 00:13:22,340
-Can't.
-Why not?
171
00:13:22,421 --> 00:13:24,460
-I'm not allowed.
-Veggie?
172
00:13:24,541 --> 00:13:27,061
Knife crime.
Dad thinks I'll end up getting stabbed.
173
00:13:27,141 --> 00:13:28,980
You'll be all right with me.
174
00:13:29,061 --> 00:13:32,061
Look after me, would you? Protect me?
175
00:13:32,141 --> 00:13:33,701
Do me best.
176
00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:37,421
Fancy coming to mine for tea?
177
00:13:37,501 --> 00:13:40,501
It's just tea, Liam,
not a marriage proposal.
178
00:13:52,501 --> 00:13:54,421
-[Joe] Bad move.
-[bottle hits the floor]
179
00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:56,860
-Borrowing off a Maguire?
-I had no choice.
180
00:13:57,581 --> 00:14:00,301
Only way I could pay
to get this lot fixed after t'fire.
181
00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:01,620
Bank won't touch me.
182
00:14:09,661 --> 00:14:10,661
I can help.
183
00:14:13,701 --> 00:14:15,740
-This is it.
-Wow!
184
00:14:16,941 --> 00:14:19,220
Do you mind if I kiss you before we go in?
185
00:14:19,301 --> 00:14:20,220
Yeah. I mean...
186
00:14:20,301 --> 00:14:22,661
-What about your dad?
-I'd sooner kiss you.
187
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:25,181
[romantic music]
188
00:14:36,301 --> 00:14:37,541
[cutlery clinks]
189
00:14:37,620 --> 00:14:40,021
So, what does your mother do, Liam?
190
00:14:42,421 --> 00:14:43,381
She's a nurse.
191
00:14:43,460 --> 00:14:45,460
-And what about your father?
-He passed away.
192
00:14:46,141 --> 00:14:47,301
Ah. Sorry, son.
193
00:14:47,381 --> 00:14:49,821
It's not your fault.
It was a long time ago.
194
00:14:49,901 --> 00:14:51,141
Do you remember him?
195
00:14:56,100 --> 00:14:57,220
He was a doctor.
196
00:14:57,301 --> 00:14:58,941
Family of medics, eh?
197
00:14:59,021 --> 00:15:00,220
He was a heart specialist.
198
00:15:00,301 --> 00:15:03,181
Consulted in unexplained coronaries
in young adults.
199
00:15:03,261 --> 00:15:04,100
Really?
200
00:15:04,821 --> 00:15:07,220
Pioneered three drugs trials at the MRI.
201
00:15:07,821 --> 00:15:10,021
He was up
for two clinical excellence awards.
202
00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:11,220
Fantastic.
203
00:15:13,381 --> 00:15:15,821
When they gave him
a three-page spread in The Lancet,
204
00:15:15,901 --> 00:15:17,821
we realised he was something special.
205
00:15:17,901 --> 00:15:20,740
He was up for an MBE,
but he was against the monarchy.
206
00:15:20,821 --> 00:15:24,220
Said they were all a bunch of overpaid,
over-privileged idiots.
207
00:15:28,061 --> 00:15:29,821
That's the only thing we disagreed on.
208
00:15:29,901 --> 00:15:33,661
Personally, I'm all for the Royal Family.
A ray of light in such dark times.
209
00:15:33,740 --> 00:15:35,701
Where they lead, we follow.
Don't you think?
210
00:15:38,541 --> 00:15:42,141
Is it okay if me and Liam go upstairs
for a bit? Listen to some music?
211
00:15:42,220 --> 00:15:44,901
I think it's probably best
I get Liam back home now, Holly.
212
00:15:44,980 --> 00:15:46,500
It's fine, thanks, I'll walk.
213
00:15:46,581 --> 00:15:48,181
Don't be silly, where do you live?
214
00:15:59,821 --> 00:16:00,860
Thanks!
215
00:16:13,620 --> 00:16:15,021
[rock music playing]
216
00:16:24,941 --> 00:16:27,380
-You should go and see her.
-What's she said?
217
00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:31,261
It's about her mum and dad.
218
00:16:31,340 --> 00:16:33,860
She can piss off.
I've said sorry, I'm not grovelling.
219
00:16:33,941 --> 00:16:35,581
Carl, I'm only trying to help ya.
220
00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:38,541
You get yourself a proper bird for once,
then you fuck it all up.
221
00:16:38,620 --> 00:16:40,821
-Is that what you want?
-Who said I fucked it up?
222
00:16:43,980 --> 00:16:47,661
Just go and see her. Talk to her.
If you don't, you'll end up losing her.
223
00:16:50,541 --> 00:16:51,581
[sighs]
224
00:16:55,380 --> 00:16:57,100
[Frank] Pint and two vowels, Karen.
225
00:16:57,181 --> 00:16:58,141
Mimi...
226
00:17:00,661 --> 00:17:01,500
Mimi?
227
00:17:02,941 --> 00:17:04,781
Isn't that enough practice for one day?
228
00:17:05,781 --> 00:17:09,660
[Mimi] You can make yourself useful
if you like. Clear glasses!
229
00:17:09,741 --> 00:17:11,180
This is useful!
230
00:17:12,061 --> 00:17:14,301
Have you seen what it does
to your triceps?
231
00:17:14,380 --> 00:17:16,821
I don't want bingo wings at my age, do I?
232
00:17:16,900 --> 00:17:18,021
[chuckles]
233
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:21,100
[slurring] That's just the start, Karen.
234
00:17:21,180 --> 00:17:22,620
It's not just physical.
235
00:17:22,701 --> 00:17:23,541
[mouthing]
236
00:17:24,581 --> 00:17:29,221
[Frank] One baby comes into the world
and another brain departs.
237
00:17:29,301 --> 00:17:30,141
Here we go.
238
00:17:30,221 --> 00:17:33,381
As the foetus gestates, it sucks...
[sucking]
239
00:17:33,461 --> 00:17:35,221
...every bit of goodness from its host.
240
00:17:35,301 --> 00:17:36,821
-[beeping]
-Protein and calcium...
241
00:17:36,900 --> 00:17:39,501
-[sucking]
-...vitamins and minerals
242
00:17:39,581 --> 00:17:42,381
and ounce by ounce, as the baby grows,
243
00:17:43,101 --> 00:17:44,940
its mother shrinks
244
00:17:45,021 --> 00:17:47,261
in equal proportion.
245
00:17:47,341 --> 00:17:48,501
Hello!
246
00:17:48,581 --> 00:17:50,061
[laughs]
247
00:17:50,141 --> 00:17:51,861
Cut the crap, Frank.
248
00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:56,141
Sheila used to keep the bog roll
in the fridge when she was up the duff.
249
00:17:56,221 --> 00:17:57,821
[laughter]
250
00:18:05,221 --> 00:18:07,261
[Karen] I like it when you talk about her.
251
00:18:12,461 --> 00:18:13,461
Do you miss her?
252
00:18:14,781 --> 00:18:16,021
[sighs]
253
00:18:16,101 --> 00:18:16,940
I do.
254
00:18:17,660 --> 00:18:19,021
When she left,
255
00:18:19,101 --> 00:18:21,741
it took me a long, long time
256
00:18:21,821 --> 00:18:24,461
to even begin to come to terms with it.
257
00:18:26,141 --> 00:18:26,981
A good...
258
00:18:27,900 --> 00:18:28,900
few days.
259
00:18:29,501 --> 00:18:30,420
Maybe even a week.
260
00:18:32,420 --> 00:18:33,861
Had this pain...
261
00:18:34,741 --> 00:18:36,141
you see, in my chest.
262
00:18:38,741 --> 00:18:41,180
And it made me realise,
it made me understand,
263
00:18:42,101 --> 00:18:43,301
what love is.
264
00:18:44,261 --> 00:18:47,180
You know, what it must be, if it exists,
265
00:18:47,900 --> 00:18:50,061
cos... when she was gone...
266
00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:57,261
I made myself feel better
trying to understand the madness.
267
00:18:58,821 --> 00:18:59,660
I missed it.
268
00:19:01,101 --> 00:19:04,061
Even started washing me hands
after taking a piss.
269
00:19:04,141 --> 00:19:05,581
Was she hard to live with?
270
00:19:06,381 --> 00:19:08,581
-Cope with?
-Fucking nightmare.
271
00:19:09,221 --> 00:19:11,221
But, no worse
than the rest of us though, eh?
272
00:19:22,781 --> 00:19:25,061
You are nothing like her, Karen.
273
00:19:28,381 --> 00:19:31,101
Don't believe that bollocks about
we all eventually
274
00:19:31,180 --> 00:19:33,420
end up turning into our parents,
275
00:19:33,501 --> 00:19:35,261
cos if it were true,
276
00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:38,221
I'd be an uptight twat
with a penchant for Shirley Bassey.
277
00:19:47,341 --> 00:19:48,581
[mouthing]
278
00:19:56,221 --> 00:19:57,221
Thanks.
279
00:19:58,700 --> 00:19:59,700
[Frank] S'all right.
280
00:20:03,541 --> 00:20:06,061
[Liam] How do you know when things
are moving too fast?
281
00:20:06,141 --> 00:20:06,981
With a girl.
282
00:20:07,061 --> 00:20:09,541
-[indistinct TV chatter]
-Blimey.
283
00:20:09,621 --> 00:20:10,461
If you love her?
284
00:20:12,341 --> 00:20:15,621
-Do you love her?
-I think so.
285
00:20:15,700 --> 00:20:18,940
-Have you bought her a soft toy yet?
-As if.
286
00:20:19,021 --> 00:20:21,461
Oh, well, it's not quite love yet, then.
287
00:20:23,381 --> 00:20:25,501
-She's nicked one of my pens.
-[laughs]
288
00:20:25,581 --> 00:20:28,061
Has she? That's serious.
289
00:20:28,141 --> 00:20:29,900
So you reckon I should buy her a teddy?
290
00:20:29,981 --> 00:20:30,821
[door closes]
291
00:20:33,301 --> 00:20:34,541
Ian said I'd lose you.
292
00:20:34,621 --> 00:20:35,981
[Maxine] You'd better go up, love.
293
00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:42,621
[Maxine] What's he said?
294
00:20:42,700 --> 00:20:44,141
I should've known myself.
295
00:20:46,261 --> 00:20:47,981
Not have him tell me.
296
00:20:50,660 --> 00:20:51,741
Told you what?
297
00:20:55,061 --> 00:20:57,221
That if I carry on like this,
I'll lose you.
298
00:20:59,180 --> 00:21:01,221
There's no point going over it, is there?
299
00:21:02,861 --> 00:21:05,900
You're right. Cut the crap, Carl.
300
00:21:05,981 --> 00:21:09,341
Show her how you feel.
Buy her a stuffed puppy or something.
301
00:21:12,341 --> 00:21:14,660
You're the first girl
I've ever said this to.
302
00:21:15,700 --> 00:21:17,101
-Leave it, Carl.
-I love you.
303
00:21:20,061 --> 00:21:22,741
I want to be with you.
I can't stop thinking about ya.
304
00:21:25,660 --> 00:21:27,821
I never meant for it to go this far.
305
00:21:29,940 --> 00:21:32,341
I'm sorry about your mum and dad.
306
00:21:32,420 --> 00:21:33,861
[Maxine] You don't need to be.
307
00:21:33,940 --> 00:21:36,940
I know how much they mean to you.
I could've fucked that up.
308
00:21:41,660 --> 00:21:44,341
I don't want to come between them
and their little girl, do I?
309
00:21:46,900 --> 00:21:48,700
Daddy's little princess.
310
00:22:00,101 --> 00:22:01,541
I've had an abortion.
311
00:22:05,981 --> 00:22:07,221
[haunting music]
312
00:22:17,781 --> 00:22:18,660
[door opens]
313
00:22:18,741 --> 00:22:20,061
Carl?
314
00:22:27,460 --> 00:22:28,261
[door closes]
315
00:22:28,341 --> 00:22:30,700
[Micky]
How d'you know when you're in love?
316
00:22:30,781 --> 00:22:31,821
You just do.
317
00:22:31,900 --> 00:22:33,900
Have sweaty palms
got anything to do with it?
318
00:22:35,660 --> 00:22:38,581
-That is our plumber.
-Him?
319
00:22:38,660 --> 00:22:41,261
Hundred quid
and he'll hold your hand in Pizza Express.
320
00:22:41,341 --> 00:22:43,141
[Ian] Extortion.
321
00:22:43,221 --> 00:22:44,900
I'm gonna bring him here.
322
00:22:44,981 --> 00:22:47,381
Get a takeaway,
give him something proper to hold on to.
323
00:22:47,460 --> 00:22:49,861
Cheaper to fuck than to mend a pipe?
324
00:22:49,940 --> 00:22:51,940
You would, though. Wouldn't ya?
325
00:23:03,821 --> 00:23:05,301
[Karen laughs]
326
00:23:06,981 --> 00:23:08,381
What the fuck are you up to?
327
00:23:09,381 --> 00:23:10,621
[both laugh]
328
00:23:10,700 --> 00:23:12,700
Rosemary Conley had it right.
329
00:23:12,781 --> 00:23:16,301
You just lay off the cheese,
moved around a bit,
330
00:23:16,381 --> 00:23:19,061
got thinner legs! Hey presto!
331
00:23:19,141 --> 00:23:20,541
She made millions.
332
00:23:20,621 --> 00:23:24,301
Now, that's enterprise.
Women come up to me,
333
00:23:24,381 --> 00:23:27,660
they tell me I look amazing
for a bird that's just dropped a kid.
334
00:23:27,741 --> 00:23:28,781
Yeah, well you do.
335
00:23:28,861 --> 00:23:32,141
I knew I was special.
Like Madonna special. Or Kylie.
336
00:23:32,221 --> 00:23:33,381
Come on. You're better than that.
337
00:23:33,460 --> 00:23:37,141
This... is my... empire, Jamie! [giggles]
338
00:23:37,221 --> 00:23:38,821
[Karen] Boing...
339
00:23:41,821 --> 00:23:43,781
[both laugh and scream]
340
00:23:43,861 --> 00:23:46,781
[Karen] Oh! [laughs]
341
00:23:46,861 --> 00:23:48,861
-[door closes]
-[dog barks]
342
00:24:14,261 --> 00:24:16,501
What you rattling about at this hour for?
343
00:24:18,541 --> 00:24:19,581
What's she been doing?
344
00:24:19,660 --> 00:24:21,741
-[Mimi] It's not normal.
-She's fine.
345
00:24:21,821 --> 00:24:25,781
[Mimi] She isn't fine!
Frank friggin' Gallagher's noticed.
346
00:24:25,861 --> 00:24:28,180
People can see it, you know!
Why can't you?
347
00:24:29,381 --> 00:24:31,940
Get your father and the lads,
we need to look for her.
348
00:24:32,021 --> 00:24:33,021
Leave it!
349
00:24:34,021 --> 00:24:36,061
[Mimi] That's my grandson
that's out there!
350
00:24:36,141 --> 00:24:39,381
And she's my wife! Now just fuck off!
351
00:24:40,621 --> 00:24:42,381
[dramatic music]
352
00:25:08,861 --> 00:25:10,021
Karen!
353
00:25:11,460 --> 00:25:14,781
-Everything okay?
-I could do with a bit of a hand.
354
00:25:14,861 --> 00:25:17,021
It's a bit early to be shopping, isn't it?
355
00:25:17,101 --> 00:25:18,220
Once Connor's awake, I'm awake.
356
00:25:18,301 --> 00:25:20,621
-Karen, where the fuck've you been?
-[Paddy] All right, Jamie.
357
00:25:20,700 --> 00:25:22,940
I've been shopping,
I got you some custard tarts.
358
00:25:23,021 --> 00:25:25,460
-You didn't bring your mobile.
-Who am I going to call at this time?
359
00:25:25,541 --> 00:25:28,180
-Fuck's sake, Karen.
-You're overreacting.
360
00:25:28,261 --> 00:25:30,301
[Jamie] You've been gone all night!
361
00:25:30,381 --> 00:25:33,700
Get a grip.
He's gonna have me microchipped next.
362
00:25:33,781 --> 00:25:36,021
-Is he okay?
-Why wouldn't he be okay?
363
00:25:36,101 --> 00:25:37,581
[Jamie] Anything could've happened.
364
00:25:37,660 --> 00:25:39,581
Have you seen the CCTV in there?
365
00:25:39,660 --> 00:25:42,581
Do you know they've got a separate camera
over disposable razors
366
00:25:42,660 --> 00:25:46,341
because apparently they're the most nicked
item from supermarkets. Did you know that?
367
00:25:46,420 --> 00:25:49,781
You'd think it'd be perfume
or cellulite cream, wouldn't ya?
368
00:25:51,101 --> 00:25:52,460
Let's just go home.
369
00:25:53,781 --> 00:25:54,900
Fine.
370
00:25:58,700 --> 00:25:59,781
[sighs]
371
00:26:01,660 --> 00:26:03,621
[Carl] You all cheered up now, eh?
372
00:26:03,700 --> 00:26:05,101
[Carl laughs]
373
00:26:11,981 --> 00:26:13,541
You didn't even give me the chance.
374
00:26:13,621 --> 00:26:17,301
If I'd have known I was going to be a dad,
I might've started to act like one.
375
00:26:17,381 --> 00:26:19,940
It wouldn't have made any difference.
376
00:26:20,021 --> 00:26:24,420
-Why? Cos you think I'd be shit?
-It's got nothing to do with that.
377
00:26:24,501 --> 00:26:26,581
Just another Frank?
378
00:26:26,660 --> 00:26:28,301
Your words, not mine.
379
00:26:30,900 --> 00:26:32,821
-Does Ian know?
-No.
380
00:26:44,101 --> 00:26:46,981
We can have kids
when we've both grown up a bit.
381
00:26:49,660 --> 00:26:50,900
Yeah, right.
382
00:27:15,660 --> 00:27:16,541
[Joe] All right?
383
00:27:18,741 --> 00:27:19,821
Where's your mother?
384
00:27:24,420 --> 00:27:26,981
She owes me money, remember?
385
00:27:27,061 --> 00:27:28,981
None of my business, remember?
386
00:27:31,460 --> 00:27:33,220
[Joe] You won't find her in there.
387
00:27:34,180 --> 00:27:36,420
This is my shop now. I bought it.
388
00:27:37,341 --> 00:27:39,741
New lock, lack of stock, and barrel.
389
00:27:56,301 --> 00:27:57,900
Wondered how long it'd take you.
390
00:27:58,581 --> 00:27:59,460
[door closes]
391
00:28:00,261 --> 00:28:01,741
With interest.
392
00:28:11,900 --> 00:28:13,660
-Feeling better?
-What do you think?
393
00:28:14,581 --> 00:28:16,261
Listen, it had nothing to do with me.
394
00:28:16,341 --> 00:28:18,900
Yeah, right. That's what I thought
when I got me face smashed in.
395
00:28:18,981 --> 00:28:21,501
Listen, pal, I'm not gonna be sorry
for something I haven't done.
396
00:28:21,581 --> 00:28:22,900
-Course not.
-[Yvonne] It's done.
397
00:28:22,981 --> 00:28:24,061
Over.
398
00:28:25,501 --> 00:28:26,341
Wise woman.
399
00:28:27,341 --> 00:28:29,660
A toast, to new beginnings.
400
00:28:35,420 --> 00:28:36,861
[mobile phone rings]
401
00:28:41,341 --> 00:28:42,341
Hello?
402
00:28:45,460 --> 00:28:46,460
Hello?
403
00:28:49,261 --> 00:28:50,180
Rude not to.
404
00:28:53,301 --> 00:28:55,700
[sighs contentedly]
Good doing business with ya!
405
00:28:57,541 --> 00:29:00,381
[playing soft music]
406
00:29:09,700 --> 00:29:11,141
[music becomes distant]
407
00:29:17,980 --> 00:29:21,061
[music fades into romantic opera music]
408
00:29:52,781 --> 00:29:53,781
[Holly] Liam?
409
00:29:56,861 --> 00:29:58,741
[Holly] Liam?
410
00:29:58,821 --> 00:30:00,021
[loud thud]
411
00:30:01,541 --> 00:30:02,621
[groans in pain]
412
00:30:02,700 --> 00:30:04,101
[phone rings]
413
00:30:06,061 --> 00:30:06,980
Jockey.
414
00:30:08,900 --> 00:30:10,261
Frank, school.
415
00:30:14,220 --> 00:30:16,581
Hello? Yeah?
416
00:30:17,541 --> 00:30:19,980
["Wannabe" by Spice Girls
plays loudly above]
417
00:30:22,141 --> 00:30:23,741
[sighs]
418
00:30:23,821 --> 00:30:25,541
Stay there, I'll go.
419
00:30:26,541 --> 00:30:27,900
[Frank sighs and hangs up]
420
00:30:30,460 --> 00:30:33,301
[music becomes distorted]
421
00:30:34,341 --> 00:30:35,940
[music plays very loudly]
422
00:30:41,460 --> 00:30:42,341
[music stops]
423
00:30:43,101 --> 00:30:45,180
-Sorry.
-It's okay.
424
00:30:50,141 --> 00:30:51,381
How are you feeling?
425
00:30:53,141 --> 00:30:54,821
We should never've decorated.
426
00:30:56,381 --> 00:31:00,861
I know some people that keep
dead peoples' rooms the same for years.
427
00:31:02,621 --> 00:31:03,900
Like a shrine.
428
00:31:06,501 --> 00:31:10,581
Who had the right to just wipe out
all trace of her like that?
429
00:31:12,341 --> 00:31:14,141
I'm sure it wasn't intentional.
430
00:31:15,061 --> 00:31:17,141
It's not right, though, is it?
431
00:31:20,821 --> 00:31:22,660
You miss her, don't you?
432
00:31:24,940 --> 00:31:26,900
She was me best friend.
433
00:31:29,940 --> 00:31:31,821
And she was my baby girl.
434
00:31:52,821 --> 00:31:54,740
Let me get Shane to decorate for you.
435
00:31:55,940 --> 00:31:58,821
Not just in here, I mean. The whole pub.
436
00:31:58,900 --> 00:32:01,220
It'll do you good
to have a change about the place.
437
00:32:02,420 --> 00:32:04,541
You're too good to me.
438
00:32:04,621 --> 00:32:06,021
Nonsense.
439
00:32:06,101 --> 00:32:08,541
There's no such thing as in-laws
where I come from.
440
00:32:08,621 --> 00:32:10,621
You marry into the family and that's it.
441
00:32:13,900 --> 00:32:15,341
[melancholy music]
442
00:32:20,940 --> 00:32:24,021
You call them mum and dad.
Two sets of parents.
443
00:32:27,980 --> 00:32:29,781
[Mimi knocking] Karen?
444
00:32:33,341 --> 00:32:35,180
Jesus!
445
00:32:35,781 --> 00:32:37,061
[Mimi] Stop her, Paddy!
446
00:32:39,660 --> 00:32:41,261
[glass breaking]
447
00:32:41,341 --> 00:32:42,900
Christ! Karen, no!
448
00:32:43,900 --> 00:32:44,900
[Paddy grunts]
449
00:32:44,980 --> 00:32:46,781
[Karen laughs]
450
00:32:46,861 --> 00:32:48,101
[Mimi] What are you doing?
451
00:32:48,180 --> 00:32:49,900
[Karen laughs manically]
452
00:32:49,980 --> 00:32:52,821
Why are you putting us through this,
you selfish bitch?
453
00:32:52,900 --> 00:32:54,861
Get out! Just get out!
454
00:32:54,940 --> 00:32:56,581
[sobbing]
455
00:32:56,660 --> 00:32:59,381
[Paddy hushes her] It's okay.
456
00:33:01,261 --> 00:33:02,740
[uncontrollable sobbing]
457
00:33:11,180 --> 00:33:13,581
[Micky] Yeah, another pipe's gone, mate.
458
00:33:15,381 --> 00:33:16,861
Well, soon as you can, really.
459
00:33:19,141 --> 00:33:20,581
All right, nice one.
460
00:33:21,900 --> 00:33:23,101
[suggestive music]
461
00:33:36,541 --> 00:33:37,621
[grunts]
462
00:33:42,581 --> 00:33:46,501
[Mickey] Oh, no! Butterfingers!
[groans exaggeratedly]
463
00:33:46,581 --> 00:33:48,861
No worries. Happens all the time.
464
00:33:49,781 --> 00:33:50,700
Yeah?
465
00:33:52,141 --> 00:33:54,341
Take it off, I'll dry it out for ya.
466
00:33:55,740 --> 00:33:56,940
-No need.
-Oh, It's fine!
467
00:33:57,021 --> 00:34:00,900
It's no trouble, mate.
Take it off, I'll sort it.
468
00:34:00,980 --> 00:34:03,261
-I'll live. Honest.
-Take it off!
469
00:34:10,820 --> 00:34:12,860
[tiger roar]
470
00:34:13,740 --> 00:34:15,381
[pulsating music]
471
00:34:21,220 --> 00:34:22,541
[music fades out]
472
00:34:25,141 --> 00:34:26,740
Another drink?
473
00:34:26,820 --> 00:34:29,101
Why not? Yeah.
474
00:34:33,180 --> 00:34:35,501
["Could It Be Magic"
by Take That plays loudly]
475
00:34:41,501 --> 00:34:42,780
Come on!
476
00:34:44,541 --> 00:34:45,621
-[Jamie] Karen?
-[Paddy] Karen?
477
00:34:48,381 --> 00:34:49,581
-Karen?
-Karen?
478
00:34:50,860 --> 00:34:51,981
[Jamie] Karen!
479
00:34:52,061 --> 00:34:53,220
[Paddy] Karen?
480
00:34:54,860 --> 00:34:56,141
[music gets louder]
481
00:34:59,101 --> 00:35:00,340
What the fuck do you want?
482
00:35:01,860 --> 00:35:02,701
[music stops]
483
00:35:02,780 --> 00:35:04,541
I was thinking orange, what do you think?
484
00:35:04,621 --> 00:35:05,981
-Yeah, whatever you think.
-Blue?
485
00:35:06,061 --> 00:35:08,300
Yellow? I dunno. White?
486
00:35:08,381 --> 00:35:09,901
White?
487
00:35:09,981 --> 00:35:13,261
-[yelling] White! White! White!
-[distorted screaming]
488
00:35:13,340 --> 00:35:14,661
White?
489
00:35:14,741 --> 00:35:17,340
Dad! Keep him away! Get him away from me!
490
00:35:17,421 --> 00:35:19,541
[Karen screams]
491
00:35:19,621 --> 00:35:20,461
[Jamie] Please!
492
00:35:20,541 --> 00:35:22,181
-Keep him away!
-Not now, son!
493
00:35:22,261 --> 00:35:24,421
-I'm her husband, Dad! Karen!
-No!
494
00:35:24,501 --> 00:35:25,741
Please, go! Go now!
495
00:35:25,820 --> 00:35:27,981
[Karen] No!
496
00:35:28,061 --> 00:35:29,501
-[door closes]
-[Karen grunts]
497
00:35:31,181 --> 00:35:33,181
Calm down, calm down.
[Paddy hushes her]
498
00:35:33,261 --> 00:35:35,501
[Karen breathes heavily] Dad!
499
00:35:35,581 --> 00:35:38,340
[sobbing] Dad...
500
00:35:40,101 --> 00:35:42,061
What happens when we die?
501
00:35:44,421 --> 00:35:45,981
Does it just switch off?
502
00:35:47,741 --> 00:35:51,261
You're here for years, and then nothing.
503
00:35:51,340 --> 00:35:55,061
Cos what's the point?
Could be gone tomorrow.
504
00:35:55,141 --> 00:35:58,501
Could be run over. By a bus. A truck.
505
00:35:58,581 --> 00:36:00,860
A fucking milk float.
506
00:36:00,941 --> 00:36:04,221
Can you imagine the embarrassment
if one of them took you out?
507
00:36:05,340 --> 00:36:08,261
You're not going to die.
508
00:36:10,901 --> 00:36:12,461
[soft, sad music]
509
00:36:21,181 --> 00:36:22,621
Joe was right.
510
00:36:24,141 --> 00:36:25,101
Me...
511
00:36:26,221 --> 00:36:28,261
in me tight tops...
512
00:36:28,340 --> 00:36:30,741
[voice deepens] "...and your short skirt,
513
00:36:30,820 --> 00:36:33,461
you're just a slag."
514
00:36:36,621 --> 00:36:38,461
[voice breaking] I'm sorry, Mandy.
515
00:36:40,021 --> 00:36:43,381
We couldn't help it,
we tried but we couldn't...
516
00:36:43,461 --> 00:36:45,741
I'm so sorry.
517
00:36:46,581 --> 00:36:47,820
[door opens]
518
00:36:50,141 --> 00:36:52,860
No! Not him!
519
00:36:52,941 --> 00:36:55,101
Oh! Fucking hell!
520
00:36:55,181 --> 00:36:56,581
-[Jamie] Karen!
-[Paddy] No, no, no!
521
00:36:56,661 --> 00:36:58,101
[screams]
522
00:36:59,221 --> 00:37:00,340
It's me, babes!
523
00:37:01,661 --> 00:37:03,261
[screaming intensifies]
524
00:37:03,340 --> 00:37:05,780
-[Jamie] Calm down, love, it's me!
-[Karen] No!
525
00:37:06,661 --> 00:37:08,021
[Karen] No, no!
526
00:37:08,101 --> 00:37:12,261
-[Karen screams] No!
-[Mimi speaks inaudibly]
527
00:37:27,261 --> 00:37:28,501
[Ian] You okay?
528
00:37:28,581 --> 00:37:30,941
-I need somewhere to stay.
-That bad?
529
00:37:32,261 --> 00:37:33,421
Come on.
530
00:37:34,221 --> 00:37:37,340
-[Derek] Let me give you a lift home, eh?
-[Liam] Honest, it's fine.
531
00:37:37,421 --> 00:37:40,380
[Frank] All right, son? [panting]
532
00:37:40,461 --> 00:37:43,820
[Frank] What's going on, son?
Let's have a look. Come here. [groans]
533
00:37:43,901 --> 00:37:47,461
Oh, that's all right,
it's nothing much to write home about, eh?
534
00:37:50,261 --> 00:37:51,141
Son?
535
00:37:53,860 --> 00:37:55,181
[chuckles]
536
00:37:55,261 --> 00:37:57,421
No matter how fucking cool
you think you are,
537
00:37:57,501 --> 00:37:59,941
as soon as they get to secondary school
they're always ashamed
538
00:38:00,021 --> 00:38:02,141
-about being seen with their old man.
-Old?
539
00:38:02,221 --> 00:38:04,221
-Don't you mean deceased?
-[Derek] Holly!
540
00:38:04,300 --> 00:38:07,061
[Derek sighs] No offence.
We thought you were dead.
541
00:38:08,300 --> 00:38:10,501
Well, half cut, pal, I'll give you that.
542
00:38:10,581 --> 00:38:13,221
But as God is my witness,
I'm anything but dead.
543
00:38:16,221 --> 00:38:17,901
[Holly] Apparently, they dedicated
544
00:38:17,981 --> 00:38:20,380
a waiting room to your name
when you were mown down?
545
00:38:20,461 --> 00:38:21,701
[Derek] By a fire engine.
546
00:38:21,780 --> 00:38:24,661
[Holly] Jumped in front of it
saving a six-year-old girl's life?
547
00:38:24,741 --> 00:38:26,741
She was thrown 50 feet in the air?
548
00:38:33,021 --> 00:38:35,141
-I thought we were good together.
-We are.
549
00:38:35,221 --> 00:38:37,741
[Frank chuckles] Listen, kid,
550
00:38:37,820 --> 00:38:41,661
telling porkies to dazzle the ladies
might seem a good idea at the time
551
00:38:42,261 --> 00:38:45,701
but it's always going to come back,
and bite you on the arse. Mark my words.
552
00:38:45,780 --> 00:38:47,021
Sorry.
553
00:38:47,101 --> 00:38:48,661
Keep your dignity, kid.
554
00:38:49,501 --> 00:38:50,860
You know, we all do it.
555
00:38:51,461 --> 00:38:54,981
Most lads your age would walk over
hot coals to get a bit of muff.
556
00:38:55,061 --> 00:38:56,261
[Frank laughs]
557
00:38:56,901 --> 00:38:59,541
What's a lickle white lie
between friends, eh, Mr...
558
00:38:59,621 --> 00:39:01,261
[Derek] Come on, Holly.
559
00:39:01,340 --> 00:39:03,101
I don't blame you for lying, lad.
560
00:39:03,181 --> 00:39:04,820
I'd have done the same
if he was my father.
561
00:39:04,901 --> 00:39:06,340
Hey, just hang on a minute, pal.
562
00:39:06,421 --> 00:39:07,661
I'm only trying to be polite.
563
00:39:07,741 --> 00:39:09,741
And I'm a good father,
for your information.
564
00:39:09,820 --> 00:39:12,860
-Admittedly, not the best in...
-I'm sorry. Can we just start again?
565
00:39:12,941 --> 00:39:13,941
when they want a pint!
566
00:39:14,021 --> 00:39:16,061
-And where would he fit in?
-And I love them...
567
00:39:16,141 --> 00:39:18,741
[Holly] What if you ask me
over for tea and he's there?
568
00:39:18,820 --> 00:39:21,101
...be honest with them.
We have a laugh together.
569
00:39:21,181 --> 00:39:22,461
I'm proud of what I've got.
570
00:39:22,541 --> 00:39:24,701
-[Frank] Proud of each...
-Will you just shut up?
571
00:39:24,780 --> 00:39:26,101
-...and every one of them.
-Are you always this rude?
572
00:39:26,181 --> 00:39:30,701
Foul-mouthed? You're behaving like
a rancid, festering, smelly, old tramp.
573
00:39:33,780 --> 00:39:37,380
[Holly] Dad, can Liam come
in the car with us? Please.
574
00:39:42,501 --> 00:39:44,380
[sad music]
575
00:39:49,181 --> 00:39:52,541
Right, it's okay, son. I understand.
576
00:39:52,621 --> 00:39:54,701
You know where I am if you need me.
577
00:39:54,780 --> 00:39:56,941
Maybe "tramp" was a bit harsh.
578
00:40:08,181 --> 00:40:09,741
[Holly] Liam?
579
00:40:10,661 --> 00:40:11,860
Liam!
580
00:40:46,780 --> 00:40:48,541
[Kelly]
Why don't we just tell them the truth?
581
00:40:48,621 --> 00:40:49,621
[Mimi] What, and lose all trade?
582
00:40:49,701 --> 00:40:51,261
[Paddy] It's not good for business
Shane being cuckoo.
583
00:40:51,340 --> 00:40:54,141
Karen's the reason most blokes
come in here in the first place.
584
00:40:54,221 --> 00:40:57,621
I think they'll find it in their hearts
to forgive her for a few week's absence.
585
00:40:57,701 --> 00:40:59,701
No one wants a screaming banshee
pulling pints, though.
586
00:40:59,780 --> 00:41:01,701
[Kelly] She's ill.
Why can't you just say that?
587
00:41:01,780 --> 00:41:03,780
-[Mimi] People aren't stupid.
-[Kelly] Oh, really?
588
00:41:03,860 --> 00:41:06,780
-Is that a fact?
-We could say she's on remand for assault?
589
00:41:06,860 --> 00:41:08,380
-[Paddy] A family tiff?
-Uh-huh.
590
00:41:08,461 --> 00:41:12,340
She knocked seven shades of shite
out of one of you two lads?
591
00:41:12,421 --> 00:41:14,021
-Yeah, but...
-[Mimi] I like it!
592
00:41:14,101 --> 00:41:15,581
Assault it is, then.
593
00:41:22,541 --> 00:41:24,461
-Dad?
-[sighs] What?
594
00:41:24,541 --> 00:41:28,261
Could you sub us a oner? I'm late
on the rent and Ian's being a right cunt.
595
00:41:28,340 --> 00:41:29,901
As he should be if you're late.
596
00:41:40,661 --> 00:41:42,661
[mobile phone rings]
597
00:41:43,501 --> 00:41:44,541
Hello?
598
00:41:47,461 --> 00:41:48,820
[Paddy] Hello?
599
00:41:51,501 --> 00:41:53,261
[sighs contentedly]
Good doing business with ya!
600
00:41:55,780 --> 00:41:57,021
[Yvonne giggles]
601
00:42:00,421 --> 00:42:02,181
[Micky grunts in pain]
602
00:42:04,501 --> 00:42:06,300
I take that as a no, then.
603
00:42:09,421 --> 00:42:10,661
[frantic music]
604
00:42:14,541 --> 00:42:16,101
Shit!
605
00:42:16,181 --> 00:42:17,340
Fuck!
606
00:42:25,061 --> 00:42:27,780
[Yvonne] Promise you'll call me every day.
607
00:42:27,860 --> 00:42:28,941
Course I will.
608
00:42:34,901 --> 00:42:36,261
I love you, son.
609
00:42:38,701 --> 00:42:40,340
Right. Go on.
610
00:42:41,820 --> 00:42:45,181
-What kind of mother leaves her son?
-A good one. You've done a brilliant job.
611
00:42:45,261 --> 00:42:47,421
He's a good lad. He'll be fine.
612
00:42:47,501 --> 00:42:49,101
Thanks.
613
00:42:51,741 --> 00:42:53,421
Keep her safe or you're dead meat.
614
00:42:53,501 --> 00:42:54,981
Course I will.
615
00:42:55,061 --> 00:42:57,661
And you stick with Joe.
He'll look after you.
616
00:42:59,101 --> 00:43:01,820
-I can look after myself.
-You know what I mean.
617
00:43:01,901 --> 00:43:03,021
Be careful.
618
00:43:13,021 --> 00:43:14,380
-[Stan grunts]
-[loud thump]
619
00:43:16,141 --> 00:43:18,021
[heavy breathing]
620
00:43:34,541 --> 00:43:35,501
[door opens]
621
00:43:37,860 --> 00:43:39,900
-She asked me to.
-Why?
622
00:43:41,501 --> 00:43:43,981
She said she doesn't want any more hassle.
623
00:43:44,061 --> 00:43:46,340
-There is no hassle.
-I'm only helping out.
624
00:43:46,421 --> 00:43:47,380
I could've done it.
625
00:43:48,300 --> 00:43:51,421
Maybe it's best if you both
get some space for a few days.
626
00:43:51,501 --> 00:43:52,621
Is that what she said?
627
00:43:53,701 --> 00:43:54,860
We need space?
628
00:43:54,941 --> 00:43:57,820
That's right up there with,
"It's not you, it's me."
629
00:43:57,900 --> 00:44:00,340
You'll be telling me
she doesn't deserve me next.
630
00:44:00,421 --> 00:44:01,741
I knew you'd take her side.
631
00:44:01,820 --> 00:44:03,780
I'm not taking sides!
632
00:44:03,860 --> 00:44:05,621
I want what's best for both of ya.
633
00:44:06,900 --> 00:44:08,701
Has she told you everything?
634
00:44:10,661 --> 00:44:13,300
I said what's between you two
is none of my business.
635
00:44:13,380 --> 00:44:14,461
-Mate, she--
-Carl, no.
636
00:44:15,101 --> 00:44:16,741
Mate, I don't wanna know.
637
00:44:22,860 --> 00:44:25,541
[Micky grunts]
638
00:44:25,621 --> 00:44:28,141
-[rattling of tools]
-[Micky grunts]
639
00:44:28,221 --> 00:44:30,061
-[Ian] What's happened now?
-Pipes.
640
00:44:30,141 --> 00:44:31,941
-Again?
-Yeah.
641
00:44:32,021 --> 00:44:33,461
I'd better give Dan a call.
642
00:44:33,541 --> 00:44:36,900
-What's up?
-System must be fucked.
643
00:44:36,981 --> 00:44:39,661
Think we need the whole thing re-doing.
Everything just keeps leaking.
644
00:44:40,701 --> 00:44:43,900
-[phone being dialled]
-No, that's nowt, that.
645
00:44:43,981 --> 00:44:46,780
Just need to replace the trap, that's all.
646
00:44:46,860 --> 00:44:49,021
Someone's been pissing about
with this, haven't they?
647
00:44:50,701 --> 00:44:51,900
What?
648
00:44:53,621 --> 00:44:55,701
Helpless female course at sixth form.
649
00:44:55,780 --> 00:44:58,300
[Maxine] I did basic plumbing.
Just leave it to me.
650
00:45:00,221 --> 00:45:01,780
-Nice one.
-[Micky sighs]
651
00:45:05,701 --> 00:45:08,300
[Jamie] Early lesson
in being married to a Jackson.
652
00:45:08,380 --> 00:45:13,581
Not sometimes, but every time,
you just can't win.
653
00:45:13,661 --> 00:45:18,541
But do I really want to?
And what is winning, anyway?
654
00:45:18,621 --> 00:45:21,181
She's a bit like my old mate Kenny Morris,
is my missus.
655
00:45:21,261 --> 00:45:22,501
[Maxine and Ian laughing]
656
00:45:22,581 --> 00:45:26,261
[Jamie] Trying to make me go along
with one crazy idea after the next.
657
00:45:27,501 --> 00:45:29,621
Hardly ever knows
when to take no for an answer
658
00:45:29,701 --> 00:45:33,061
and there's not one person I know
that she'll take an ounce of shit from.
659
00:45:34,181 --> 00:45:37,661
The only real difference
between her and Kenny is,
660
00:45:37,741 --> 00:45:41,501
when she asks me
to get on the back of her bike, I do.
661
00:45:41,581 --> 00:45:44,900
Just like that. No questions asked.
662
00:45:45,900 --> 00:45:47,501
[trampoline springs squeaking]
663
00:45:47,581 --> 00:45:49,581
[Jamie] Fucking terrifying, yeah.
664
00:45:49,661 --> 00:45:50,941
[Karen laughing] Bouncy, bouncy.
665
00:45:51,021 --> 00:45:52,261
[Jamie] But the ride?
666
00:45:54,780 --> 00:45:56,221
Wouldn't miss it for the world.
667
00:45:56,300 --> 00:46:00,261
[Karen laughing]
One, two, three, four...
668
00:46:05,421 --> 00:46:07,820
[Billy] Mrs. Maguire,
you're trying to seduce me.
669
00:46:07,900 --> 00:46:10,181
Switch the fucking light on!
670
00:46:10,261 --> 00:46:12,101
I shall see again on my terms.
671
00:46:12,181 --> 00:46:14,741
[Frank] Where the shit am I?
672
00:46:14,820 --> 00:46:16,941
Just point me home, will ya?
673
00:46:17,021 --> 00:46:18,101
[Mimi] This is ours.
674
00:46:18,181 --> 00:46:20,541
-I like what we have.
-You're always pleasing me.
675
00:46:20,621 --> 00:46:22,981
Just need to liven things up
with a game of pull a pig.
676
00:46:23,061 --> 00:46:25,780
I can't believe
I promised him he'd get laid tonight.
677
00:46:25,860 --> 00:46:27,741
I think we both want
the same thing, don't we?
678
00:46:27,820 --> 00:46:29,261
It has been a long time.
679
00:46:29,340 --> 00:46:30,661
[Paddy] Shane made me a promise tonight.
680
00:46:30,741 --> 00:46:32,421
Wash your cock in the sink
and throw on a condom.
681
00:46:32,501 --> 00:46:34,221
-Smell my finger.
-What's that?
682
00:46:34,300 --> 00:46:36,421
-Your mam. [laughs]
-[laughter]
683
00:47:17,860 --> 00:47:19,621
Hiya, is that Dicks And Mortar?
684
00:47:20,941 --> 00:47:23,181
Yeah, I think I've got
a bit of subsidence, mate.
685
00:47:23,261 --> 00:47:25,421
Any chance you can come over
for a shufties?
686
00:47:26,741 --> 00:47:27,780
Nice one.
687
00:47:29,780 --> 00:47:31,221
[grunts]
688
00:47:37,141 --> 00:47:38,101
[grunts]
689
00:47:38,181 --> 00:47:39,741
[loud crash]
74817
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