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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,740 --> 00:00:05,960 And in the lighter side of the news, Teen Scene Magazine today released the 2 00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:08,520 results of its annual teen heartthrob poll. 3 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:13,340 They have declared that the dreamiest guy alive is Kirk. Who cares? 4 00:00:17,420 --> 00:00:18,420 How many watching? 5 00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:19,679 Nothing's on. 6 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:20,680 Yeah, there's gotta be. 7 00:00:21,380 --> 00:00:24,980 Anyway, you're not supposed to watch TV. You promised Mom and Dad you'd actually 8 00:00:24,980 --> 00:00:26,380 do your homework for a teen. 9 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:28,040 You don't sweat it, I will. 10 00:00:29,420 --> 00:00:30,420 Well, me, love. 11 00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:35,440 more properly known as the Castor. It is one of nature's most ambitious 12 00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:36,440 engineers. 13 00:00:36,860 --> 00:00:38,720 And you said nothing was on. 14 00:00:41,220 --> 00:00:45,560 What, Mike? What in the world are you doing in here when you have that darn 15 00:00:45,560 --> 00:00:46,860 English report due? 16 00:00:47,340 --> 00:00:49,700 What? I'm gonna get you for this, Carol. 17 00:00:50,260 --> 00:00:54,080 Like, didn't you put your hand on your heart and promise to do your homework? 18 00:00:54,380 --> 00:00:55,380 Dad, I will. 19 00:00:55,540 --> 00:00:57,360 Well, what do we have to do? Pay you to do it? 20 00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:59,620 You know, I think you're onto something here, Dad. 21 00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:03,120 Is that PBS Beaver special on yet? 22 00:01:05,239 --> 00:01:07,840 Mike, you are supposed to be doing your English homework. 23 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:10,720 I know. What is it with you people? You act like I never do my homework or 24 00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:11,679 something. 25 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:15,600 Come on, look. It's a crummy little four -page English report on Raymond 26 00:01:15,600 --> 00:01:17,540 Chandler. Four pages that are typed. 27 00:01:18,020 --> 00:01:21,000 Researched. Footnoted. With bibliography. That you should have been 28 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,940 for four weeks. And that is due tomorrow. 29 00:01:23,160 --> 00:01:26,400 And... According to your teacher... If you don't get at least a B on this... 30 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:29,160 won't pass the course and that means that you... Won't graduate. Yeah! 31 00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,860 What are you going to do? Get together and rehearse this or something? 32 00:01:33,980 --> 00:01:37,730 Mike. Mom, Dad, look, you don't have to get so excited. 33 00:01:37,990 --> 00:01:41,730 Oh, we don't? Look, I know that over the years, my school record hasn't exactly 34 00:01:41,730 --> 00:01:42,730 been terrific. 35 00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:43,770 What? Whoa. 36 00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:50,080 I know how important this report is, and I know that I kid around a lot, but 37 00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:53,580 there is no way that I'm going to let myself fail this course. I mean, Dad, 38 00:01:53,580 --> 00:01:57,560 even read the book, and that's why I have set everything aside this evening 39 00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:01,680 can spend the entire night in my room at my desk finishing that report no matter 40 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:02,680 how long it takes. 41 00:02:02,980 --> 00:02:05,200 Hello? Mikey, sorry I'm late. Ready to split? 42 00:02:07,980 --> 00:02:11,520 Show me that smile again. Ooh, show me that smile. 43 00:02:12,180 --> 00:02:15,680 Don't waste another minute on your crying. 44 00:02:16,240 --> 00:02:18,160 We're nowhere near the end. 45 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:21,960 The best is ready to begin. 46 00:02:56,940 --> 00:02:58,000 After love. 47 00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:03,000 After 48 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:26,900 love. 49 00:03:26,670 --> 00:03:27,670 Watch him dance. 50 00:03:28,470 --> 00:03:29,770 Well, okay, all right. 51 00:03:30,230 --> 00:03:33,610 Boner and I, we're merely going to take a couple of minutes to drop in on a very 52 00:03:33,610 --> 00:03:37,770 dear, very close friend of ours who's very nervous about this new job and who 53 00:03:37,770 --> 00:03:38,770 needs some support. 54 00:03:38,990 --> 00:03:40,270 The man is good. 55 00:03:40,790 --> 00:03:43,850 So who exactly is this very dear, very close friend? 56 00:03:44,470 --> 00:03:45,470 Who? Yeah. 57 00:03:45,890 --> 00:03:49,610 Well, you know the name is kind of slipping out of my mind. Sheena Woo Woo 58 00:03:49,610 --> 00:03:50,610 Buckowitz. 59 00:03:53,550 --> 00:03:56,830 Okay, all right. Now, before you jump to the wrong conclusion here, you should 60 00:03:56,830 --> 00:04:00,950 know that Sheena just got a very challenging job at Almondanza Pizza, 61 00:04:00,950 --> 00:04:01,888 dough in the air. 62 00:04:01,890 --> 00:04:02,890 Oh, yeah. 63 00:04:04,370 --> 00:04:08,250 And, Mom, Sheena's famous for needing all kinds of support. 64 00:04:09,370 --> 00:04:10,370 Oh, yeah. 65 00:04:11,970 --> 00:04:12,970 Boner, get out. 66 00:04:13,510 --> 00:04:14,570 Jason, that's rude. 67 00:04:15,350 --> 00:04:16,350 Sorry. 68 00:04:16,570 --> 00:04:19,589 Mike, go to your room. Go straight to your room and get started on your paper. 69 00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:23,280 And don't come out of your room until you either finish that homework or you 70 00:04:23,280 --> 00:04:25,120 turn 21, whichever comes first. 71 00:04:26,860 --> 00:04:28,280 You tired up all night, Mikey? 72 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:29,960 Bonner, get out! 73 00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:36,860 The crowd is stunned, ladies and gentlemen. Mike Seaver is actually going 74 00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:37,860 the book. 75 00:04:39,180 --> 00:04:41,760 And what are you kids sitting around for? Don't you have some chores to do? 76 00:04:41,940 --> 00:04:43,260 Whose night is it to take out the trash? 77 00:04:43,780 --> 00:04:45,740 Mike! Mike, take out the trash. 78 00:04:46,180 --> 00:04:49,360 What? Mike, it's your night to take out the garbage. But I have to work on my 79 00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:51,120 report. Well, you do that after the trash. 80 00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:52,480 Oh, okay. 81 00:04:52,580 --> 00:04:55,420 Fine, fine, fine, fine. But if I ever at least get a beer in the street park, 82 00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:56,480 it's on your heads. 83 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:06,400 32 seconds, not bad. 84 00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:10,720 No, I didn't get out of it, Bones. Yeah, right, sure. Listen, woo -woo, shift 85 00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:11,720 ends at 8 o 'clock. 86 00:05:11,740 --> 00:05:14,220 I want to beat the crowd and get a spot right in front of the window. 87 00:05:14,920 --> 00:05:17,160 No, I'm serious, man. I've got to finish my stupid English report. 88 00:05:17,820 --> 00:05:19,560 Mikey, Mikey, think about what counts here. 89 00:05:19,780 --> 00:05:21,120 We don't got no need for English. 90 00:05:22,540 --> 00:05:26,120 I can't believe it. I mean, all of my life, I've been walking past the windows 91 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,120 of pizza parlors, and who's always in there? 92 00:05:28,380 --> 00:05:31,320 Yeah, some porked -out old guy named Guido. 93 00:05:32,060 --> 00:05:34,220 But now, it's woo -woo Berkowitz. 94 00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:40,760 Throwing gobs of dough high into the air, reaching up to catch him, arching 95 00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:41,760 back and stretching. 96 00:05:43,020 --> 00:05:45,660 The perfect blend of form and function. 97 00:05:45,940 --> 00:05:46,940 The faith. 98 00:05:47,100 --> 00:05:48,100 The hair. 99 00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:49,320 The anchovies. 100 00:05:50,820 --> 00:05:53,780 You know, I would pay money to see her toss anything in the air. 101 00:05:54,900 --> 00:05:57,760 Look, man, there's always tomorrow night, right? No, no, no, not for me. 102 00:05:57,760 --> 00:05:59,000 see, I'm going tonight because... 103 00:05:59,310 --> 00:06:01,870 There could be a nuclear war tomorrow, and I would never forgive myself. 104 00:06:02,910 --> 00:06:04,190 Oh, great. That's great, though. 105 00:06:05,270 --> 00:06:06,270 Oh, Mike. 106 00:06:06,870 --> 00:06:07,870 Oh, Dad. 107 00:06:08,230 --> 00:06:10,930 Yeah, Mike, you know, when I saw you out here playing with a basketball, just 108 00:06:10,930 --> 00:06:14,390 wasting time, I thought to myself, well, I gotta tell you, I gotta be honest 109 00:06:14,390 --> 00:06:16,010 here, I gotta tell you right now, I got angry. 110 00:06:16,790 --> 00:06:19,850 And then I thought, no, no, no, no, maybe my kid's really got a future in 111 00:06:19,850 --> 00:06:20,850 professional basketball. 112 00:06:21,270 --> 00:06:24,090 So why not just forget about that English report? Forget about school. 113 00:06:24,450 --> 00:06:26,390 Forget about the fact you're 5 '7 and white. 114 00:06:27,630 --> 00:06:31,970 Now, I promise myself, Mike, if you made that last shot, boy, I'd just let you 115 00:06:31,970 --> 00:06:35,050 party. Just sail right on into that NBA draft. 116 00:06:36,650 --> 00:06:39,630 I guess we both know what that last airball cost you. 117 00:06:44,010 --> 00:06:45,010 Later, bone. 118 00:06:45,330 --> 00:06:47,610 Boy, one airball and your whole life is down the chute. 119 00:06:47,970 --> 00:06:49,190 No doubt it's really strict. 120 00:06:50,850 --> 00:06:54,070 Look, if you guys don't have any faith in me, don't beat around the bush. Just 121 00:06:54,070 --> 00:06:55,070 say it. 122 00:06:55,090 --> 00:06:56,450 We have no faith. 123 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:01,900 Whoa, what is that? 124 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:05,120 It's a woman in a bikini bending over. 125 00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:11,780 Ben, does Mom and Dad know that you're watching that cable channel? 126 00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:16,020 This isn't cable. This is the local news. This week they're examining the 127 00:07:16,020 --> 00:07:17,020 question. 128 00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:19,740 The only question I got is, what's her phone number? 129 00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:24,740 Oh, watch out for those nasty waves. 130 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:30,080 I knew with 36 pounds there had to be something good on it. Oh, look at that. 131 00:07:30,100 --> 00:07:32,120 She's getting all soaking wet. Poor baby. 132 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:35,740 Look at that. Oh, look at that. 133 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:42,880 Why don't you videotape it? Good idea. 134 00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:44,160 Mom, 135 00:07:47,860 --> 00:07:48,980 this isn't disgusting. 136 00:07:49,220 --> 00:07:50,240 This is the local news. 137 00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:53,200 The TV stays off for the rest of the night. What? 138 00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:55,440 Sorry, Ben. Your brother can't handle the distractions. 139 00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:01,520 Mike, upstairs. 140 00:08:01,760 --> 00:08:03,060 And I mean now. 141 00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:04,960 March. March? 142 00:08:05,220 --> 00:08:08,900 Mom, come on. Look, we're both adults here, and you don't need to treat me 143 00:08:08,900 --> 00:08:10,080 I'm some silly little child. 144 00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:11,500 Go! Now! 145 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,200 Oh, no. 146 00:08:19,260 --> 00:08:23,360 Treat me like a little kid, huh? 147 00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:25,520 All right. To work. 148 00:08:29,040 --> 00:08:30,040 Where's my desk? 149 00:08:32,820 --> 00:08:35,419 All right, who swipes my desk? 150 00:08:35,780 --> 00:08:37,539 Get to work, now. 151 00:08:37,980 --> 00:08:40,919 Fine, how's a guy supposed to work without a stupid desk? 152 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:43,880 Oh, wait a minute. 153 00:08:46,060 --> 00:08:47,920 Oh, here it is. 154 00:08:49,060 --> 00:08:52,360 All right, a desk. 155 00:08:52,780 --> 00:08:53,780 Now what else? 156 00:08:54,460 --> 00:08:55,460 Typewriter. 157 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:11,880 How was the guy supposed to type a stupid report when he... Ow. 158 00:09:17,720 --> 00:09:18,720 Okay. 159 00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:24,820 Now, where's that Raymond Chandler book? 160 00:09:26,300 --> 00:09:27,300 Oh, great. 161 00:09:41,070 --> 00:09:43,090 It's a lot of paper. I only need four pieces. 162 00:09:45,290 --> 00:09:49,730 Okay. First, I'll start with putting the paper in. 163 00:09:52,210 --> 00:09:53,750 All right. Not bad. 164 00:09:54,290 --> 00:09:56,810 All right. Now, my name. 165 00:09:58,910 --> 00:09:59,350 All 166 00:09:59,350 --> 00:10:07,090 right. 167 00:10:07,150 --> 00:10:07,909 Where was I? 168 00:10:07,910 --> 00:10:08,910 Oh, yeah. 169 00:10:09,110 --> 00:10:10,110 My name. 170 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:18,020 Ah, this is easy. 171 00:10:19,340 --> 00:10:22,860 No? No, no, wait a minute. I should write this out before I type it. Yeah. 172 00:10:23,620 --> 00:10:24,620 Okay. 173 00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:26,960 All right. 174 00:10:29,460 --> 00:10:30,460 Hmm. 175 00:10:32,220 --> 00:10:33,280 Ticonderoga number two. 176 00:10:47,370 --> 00:10:48,370 with your paper. 177 00:10:50,170 --> 00:10:51,170 How'd you know it was me? 178 00:10:51,610 --> 00:10:53,810 Because it was a dumb -sounding knock. Get out. 179 00:10:55,230 --> 00:10:59,610 Well, for your information, I did not come in here for your pathetic help. I'm 180 00:10:59,610 --> 00:11:00,770 merely here to sharpen a pencil. 181 00:11:01,310 --> 00:11:04,450 All right, over there. The pencil sharpener is a little tricky. Maybe for 182 00:11:04,490 --> 00:11:06,490 but men are much better at handling power tools. 183 00:11:12,410 --> 00:11:14,150 Oh, thanks a lot, Carol. 184 00:11:14,730 --> 00:11:15,950 Now, what am I supposed to do? 185 00:11:17,680 --> 00:11:18,680 how to be typed anyway. 186 00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:21,440 Yeah, but you gotta have a first draft first. Don't you know anything? 187 00:11:21,940 --> 00:11:23,740 You mean you haven't even started yet? 188 00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:25,340 Look, what's your point? 189 00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:27,420 4 .0, what's yours? 190 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,280 Look, Carol, I have got the whole report right up here. 191 00:11:32,720 --> 00:11:33,740 Where it's safe. 192 00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:36,320 Look, what do you know anyway? 193 00:11:36,700 --> 00:11:41,700 I know that a cursory examination of Raymond Chandler's work won't reveal the 194 00:11:41,700 --> 00:11:46,980 full extent of the depth, symbolism, and import that he weaves into his story. 195 00:11:47,530 --> 00:11:50,650 I mean, take the long goodbye, for example. I mean, here, Chandler. 196 00:11:52,850 --> 00:11:53,850 No, no, 197 00:11:55,890 --> 00:11:56,890 no, 198 00:11:57,850 --> 00:11:58,850 please. 199 00:12:03,450 --> 00:12:04,450 Testing, 200 00:12:05,970 --> 00:12:07,510 one, two, three, please work, please work, please work. 201 00:12:08,270 --> 00:12:10,210 Testing, one, two, three, please work, please work, please work. 202 00:12:19,660 --> 00:12:20,660 Oh, yeah? 203 00:12:21,580 --> 00:12:22,580 Oh, yeah, what? 204 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:26,240 Well, I was saying that you were totally wrong about what you were saying 205 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:28,340 before. What was I saying? 206 00:12:28,780 --> 00:12:32,920 Oh, well, you know, about Raymond Chandler playing the cymbals. 207 00:12:33,980 --> 00:12:37,800 No, Mike, I said his work was fraught with symbolism and import. 208 00:12:38,180 --> 00:12:40,080 Oh, right, right. Well, prove it. 209 00:12:41,020 --> 00:12:41,739 Prove it? 210 00:12:41,740 --> 00:12:43,560 Yeah. Well, Mike, you need only... 211 00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:47,410 Read the long goodbye to see how Chandler used the metaphor of the 40s 212 00:12:47,410 --> 00:12:51,870 to illustrate the plight of the modern man in the 20th century, alone fighting 213 00:12:51,870 --> 00:12:52,870 incredible odds. 214 00:12:53,190 --> 00:12:57,270 I mean, essentially, Chandler's message was that modern man hadn't traveled that 215 00:12:57,270 --> 00:12:59,090 far since Charles Syrian days. 216 00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:01,010 That's enough, Carol. 217 00:13:01,890 --> 00:13:02,890 What'd I do? 218 00:13:03,090 --> 00:13:05,410 Well, I'd guess about most of your brother's paper. 219 00:13:06,230 --> 00:13:10,290 Oh, Mom, that is such an insult. I mean, you actually think that I would have my 220 00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:11,910 little sister do my work for me? 221 00:13:12,609 --> 00:13:16,090 You were saying... Hey! 222 00:13:16,530 --> 00:13:18,570 All right, who put that in my pocket? 223 00:13:20,990 --> 00:13:23,070 I expected better of you, Dad. 224 00:13:28,110 --> 00:13:32,170 Not one more lame excuse. But, Mom, I... Not one more word. Just not one 225 00:13:32,170 --> 00:13:33,830 syllable. Not one letter. 226 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:39,980 You are not to set foot outside this room until you have typed one entire 227 00:13:40,160 --> 00:13:42,420 If you understand me, bink your eyes. 228 00:13:44,060 --> 00:13:45,060 Bink? 229 00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:49,200 Okay, okay, Mike, you leave me no choice except to take drastic action. 230 00:13:49,580 --> 00:13:51,240 Van! What are you going to do? 231 00:13:52,240 --> 00:13:54,160 I wasn't watching the news, I swear! 232 00:13:55,560 --> 00:13:57,200 Van, how would you like to make ten dollars? 233 00:13:57,860 --> 00:13:59,020 I'd rather make a hundred. 234 00:13:59,220 --> 00:14:00,220 Ten zero. 235 00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:03,420 What's the job? I want you to stand guard outside this room. 236 00:14:03,820 --> 00:14:08,960 What? If Mike comes out for any reason, you let me know. Mom, Mom, look, if you 237 00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:14,580 think that Benny here, my pal, my bro, my blood, would sue me out for $10, you 238 00:14:14,580 --> 00:14:16,940 are so wrong. I mean, Benny couldn't live with himself, right? 239 00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:19,260 No, Mom, I couldn't. See? 240 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:21,020 For $20, I could. 241 00:14:21,260 --> 00:14:22,800 $10. I can live with that. 242 00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:31,460 Well, I think we've finally done it. I had to get tough. 243 00:14:31,950 --> 00:14:35,470 But Mike's in his room, Ben's standing guard. It's only 8 o 'clock, and with 244 00:14:35,470 --> 00:14:37,330 luck, an English report will soon be born. 245 00:14:37,590 --> 00:14:38,569 Great, great. 246 00:14:38,570 --> 00:14:39,409 What are you doing? 247 00:14:39,410 --> 00:14:40,990 I'm watching TV. 248 00:14:43,570 --> 00:14:44,930 Why can't I hear anything? 249 00:14:45,630 --> 00:14:48,470 Oh, I left the sound off so I wouldn't disturb Mike. 250 00:14:48,730 --> 00:14:52,310 Well, that's very sweet, honey, but what can you watch without sound? 251 00:14:52,790 --> 00:14:54,150 This is a new special. 252 00:14:56,060 --> 00:15:00,300 An in -depth examination of the bikini question. 253 00:15:01,820 --> 00:15:03,620 I didn't know there was a question. 254 00:15:03,860 --> 00:15:04,860 Oh, yeah. 255 00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:11,600 Your turn. 256 00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:13,200 Out of the way, Ben. 257 00:15:14,020 --> 00:15:15,840 Has this visit been cleared by Mom? 258 00:15:16,340 --> 00:15:17,340 It has, yes. 259 00:15:17,480 --> 00:15:18,880 You got something on paper? 260 00:15:19,100 --> 00:15:20,100 Out of the way. 261 00:15:38,830 --> 00:15:39,830 Nice hat. 262 00:15:39,930 --> 00:15:41,570 Oh, thanks. 263 00:15:42,410 --> 00:15:46,050 Yeah, I was just gearing up a little mood music, Dad. In the mood now? 264 00:15:46,250 --> 00:15:49,250 Yeah. Because this is a hostage, Mike. 265 00:15:49,530 --> 00:15:53,630 And this is a non -negotiable demand. 266 00:15:55,430 --> 00:15:56,850 I want the English report. 267 00:16:00,390 --> 00:16:04,350 Or you will never see your stereo alive again. 268 00:16:08,430 --> 00:16:10,450 Dad, watch out for the... What 269 00:16:10,450 --> 00:16:16,770 the heck happened? 270 00:16:17,170 --> 00:16:18,170 No music. 271 00:16:18,230 --> 00:16:19,230 No friend. 272 00:16:19,490 --> 00:16:22,670 No food, except for whatever might be growing under his bed. 273 00:16:23,290 --> 00:16:25,250 No more distractions. Nothing. 274 00:16:25,570 --> 00:16:27,510 Nothing to do except finish his paper. 275 00:16:29,130 --> 00:16:32,030 Oh, whatever happened to the bikini question? 276 00:16:32,970 --> 00:16:34,210 They answered it. 277 00:16:35,530 --> 00:16:36,530 It was no. 278 00:16:39,180 --> 00:16:40,900 Are you sure there's nothing else up there for him to do? 279 00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:45,580 Nothing. Unless he decides to clean up his room. 280 00:16:47,500 --> 00:16:48,780 Nah. All 281 00:16:48,780 --> 00:16:56,100 right. 282 00:16:56,240 --> 00:16:57,240 Now I can... 283 00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:23,800 record for a nose balancing a pencil. 284 00:17:24,020 --> 00:17:26,079 And now, ladies and gentlemen, the impossible. 285 00:17:26,380 --> 00:17:29,320 Steve is going to try with not only one, but two pencils. 286 00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:39,540 Oh, please let there be batteries in it. Please let there be batteries. I'll 287 00:17:39,540 --> 00:17:40,640 never drive over 35 again. 288 00:17:45,820 --> 00:17:47,580 Yes, all right. 289 00:17:48,020 --> 00:17:50,800 Steve is ready to work. I'm talking ready. I'm ready. 290 00:19:46,890 --> 00:19:49,730 Well, either he's working... Or he escaped out the window. 291 00:19:54,650 --> 00:19:56,610 Oh, he fell asleep working. 292 00:19:56,930 --> 00:19:57,930 Let's see how he did. 293 00:19:59,950 --> 00:20:00,950 The. 294 00:20:02,190 --> 00:20:03,190 Go on. 295 00:20:03,550 --> 00:20:04,550 There is no on. 296 00:20:06,350 --> 00:20:07,350 Mike. 297 00:20:07,950 --> 00:20:09,050 Oh, uh, Mom. 298 00:20:09,610 --> 00:20:11,830 Mom, I'm doing great here. I'm on a roll. 299 00:20:12,090 --> 00:20:13,270 Oh, Dad, you're here, too. 300 00:20:13,930 --> 00:20:14,930 Oh, you're on a roll? 301 00:20:15,530 --> 00:20:18,490 One word, one lousy syllable in an hour and a half? 302 00:20:19,210 --> 00:20:22,790 Yeah, but I spelled it right. Oh, Mike, that's not funny. 303 00:20:22,990 --> 00:20:26,390 Look, I really wish I had more time to chat here, but this report is due here 304 00:20:26,390 --> 00:20:29,390 pretty soon. Mike, this is not cute, amusing, or charming. 305 00:20:29,750 --> 00:20:34,530 Well, Mom... I give up. Well, I don't. Oh, Maggie, come on. We can't help him 306 00:20:34,530 --> 00:20:38,350 anymore. It's not enough for us to want things for him. He's got to want them 307 00:20:38,350 --> 00:20:39,169 for himself. 308 00:20:39,170 --> 00:20:40,990 And apparently all he wants is to be a bum. 309 00:20:44,110 --> 00:20:45,270 You're really mad at me, aren't you, Dad? 310 00:20:45,610 --> 00:20:46,610 Yes. No. 311 00:20:46,790 --> 00:20:48,550 No? No, no, I'm mad at myself. 312 00:20:50,010 --> 00:20:54,030 Oh, I believed, I really believed that you were just, well, you were bright and 313 00:20:54,030 --> 00:20:55,550 intelligent, just a little bit lazy. 314 00:20:56,170 --> 00:21:00,330 I thought maybe someday you'd snap out of it, but I've been kidding myself. 315 00:21:01,690 --> 00:21:02,669 What are you saying? 316 00:21:02,670 --> 00:21:05,570 Nothing that he means. Jason, tell Mike that you don't mean a word that you're 317 00:21:05,570 --> 00:21:07,150 saying. I do mean it. 318 00:21:08,190 --> 00:21:10,790 I just think it's time, Maggie, that we should admit that we're wrong. 319 00:21:11,830 --> 00:21:12,830 About what? 320 00:21:13,130 --> 00:21:15,190 What did you want about it? Come on. 321 00:21:16,370 --> 00:21:21,350 I mean, we've been pushing you to realize your big potential. Maybe this 322 00:21:21,350 --> 00:21:22,350 the potential you've got. 323 00:21:23,110 --> 00:21:24,690 It is not, Jason. 324 00:21:24,930 --> 00:21:29,030 Well, that's the only explanation, Maggie. No, it isn't, Dad. Look, come 325 00:21:29,290 --> 00:21:33,490 I'm a goof, a clown, a total bozo. But I am not stupid. 326 00:21:40,190 --> 00:21:41,190 Mike. 327 00:21:41,710 --> 00:21:43,470 I believe you're a total bozo. 328 00:21:44,130 --> 00:21:45,130 What? 329 00:21:47,610 --> 00:21:48,610 Jason, what? 330 00:21:48,650 --> 00:21:52,230 You didn't mean that. Of course I didn't mean that. 331 00:21:52,550 --> 00:21:53,950 But you sounded so convincing. 332 00:21:54,170 --> 00:21:55,170 I hope so. 333 00:22:04,390 --> 00:22:07,050 Jason, you should have started insulting Mike years ago. 334 00:22:09,310 --> 00:22:10,310 Where are you going? 335 00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:13,760 Well, now that I'm on a roll, I think I'll go and wake up Ben and tell him how 336 00:22:13,760 --> 00:22:15,080 disappointed I am in him. 337 00:22:42,430 --> 00:22:49,410 And so on behalf of the entire News Center 338 00:22:49,410 --> 00:22:55,770 3 team, Mindy, Biff, Scotty, and Dr. Goss with the weather, good night from 339 00:22:55,770 --> 00:22:59,070 guys and gals who treat your news seriously. 340 00:23:02,710 --> 00:23:07,370 I did it. I did it. Four pages, footnoted, typewritten, the whole shot. 341 00:23:07,370 --> 00:23:08,189 cover, too. 342 00:23:08,190 --> 00:23:09,270 Well, that's great, Mike. 343 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:12,780 Yeah, where's Carol? I want a rubber nose and something brilliant. 344 00:23:13,420 --> 00:23:15,300 In bed, Mike. It's 11 .30. 345 00:23:15,820 --> 00:23:19,600 It can't be. Yes, you've been working on this for an hour and a half straight. 346 00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:20,960 I have? 347 00:23:21,580 --> 00:23:23,140 I mean, uh, yeah. 348 00:23:23,500 --> 00:23:24,500 What'd you expect? 349 00:23:25,620 --> 00:23:26,620 Exactly that. 350 00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:33,060 Yeah, well, see, like I said, Dad, I'm merely a total bozo. 351 00:23:33,420 --> 00:23:34,420 I know, Mike. 352 00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:36,500 We've been meaning to talk to you about that. 353 00:23:38,520 --> 00:23:39,520 Sit down, son. 354 00:23:39,870 --> 00:23:41,450 This could take quite a while. 27521

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