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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,630 --> 00:00:05,150 I had a great time tonight, Bobby. 2 00:00:05,370 --> 00:00:06,370 Yeah, me too. 3 00:00:06,790 --> 00:00:08,970 I could like anything if I went with you. 4 00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:10,710 Even the ballet? 5 00:00:10,810 --> 00:00:12,570 Sure. Why, you got tickets? 6 00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:16,390 Um... Yeah? 7 00:00:17,410 --> 00:00:19,410 I was going to ask you if you wanted to... I'd love to go. 8 00:00:19,630 --> 00:00:20,630 Go where? 9 00:00:20,670 --> 00:00:22,690 Well, wherever you were going to suggest we should go. 10 00:00:22,970 --> 00:00:25,390 No, I was going to ask you if you wanted to study together tomorrow night. 11 00:00:25,690 --> 00:00:26,690 Oh, sure. 12 00:00:29,430 --> 00:00:30,430 Well... Uh -huh. 13 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:36,400 But isn't this school year just flying by? 14 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:43,480 I mean, well, first it was summer, and then it was fall, and pretty soon it'll 15 00:00:43,480 --> 00:00:45,600 be time for the Dewey High winter dance. 16 00:00:47,140 --> 00:00:48,740 Yeah, the winter dance. 17 00:00:49,320 --> 00:00:51,480 I... I gotta go. 18 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:54,080 Good night, Carol. Hey, Bobby. Hey, Mark. 19 00:00:55,280 --> 00:00:56,280 Mike. 20 00:00:56,940 --> 00:00:58,400 Nice timing, Mike. 21 00:01:00,620 --> 00:01:02,860 That was just my surly sister. Don't mind her. 22 00:01:05,700 --> 00:01:06,700 Whoa, whoa. 23 00:01:07,220 --> 00:01:10,500 Andrea, look, I want to thank you for driving me home today while my car was 24 00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:11,018 the shop. 25 00:01:11,020 --> 00:01:11,979 My pleasure. 26 00:01:11,980 --> 00:01:12,980 Oh, hey, hold on a minute. 27 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:17,040 You're acting like I owe you a kiss or two just because you paid for the gas in 28 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:18,040 the movie and the food. 29 00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:24,620 You don't want to kiss me? Of course I want to kiss you. It's just that, well, 30 00:01:24,620 --> 00:01:26,120 got my reputation to think about. 31 00:01:28,700 --> 00:01:29,700 Okay, I'm done thinking. 32 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:19,160 I could die. 33 00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:20,920 Did he even mention the winter formal? 34 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:22,440 Uh, no. 35 00:02:22,580 --> 00:02:23,580 No? 36 00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:26,100 I brought up the dance. You didn't. 37 00:02:26,360 --> 00:02:27,339 I did. 38 00:02:27,340 --> 00:02:28,340 I could die. 39 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,120 Carol, this is not a good thing. 40 00:02:31,700 --> 00:02:32,700 Why? Why? 41 00:02:33,060 --> 00:02:35,240 Men don't like women who usurp their masculinity. 42 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:37,620 I didn't usurp, okay? 43 00:02:38,220 --> 00:02:41,800 Carol, where have you been? Men like women who let them be in charge, even if 44 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:44,220 that means you have to act dumb. Which I'm fully prepared to do. 45 00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:51,680 To the winter formal, I just sort of hinted. 46 00:02:51,980 --> 00:02:56,740 Carol, football players do not take their tutors to the prom. They take 47 00:02:56,740 --> 00:03:00,200 girls in pleated skirts who can turn their bodies into letters of the 48 00:03:04,780 --> 00:03:05,820 Don't turn around, okay? 49 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:14,660 Thanks, Shannon. Now, don't be ridiculous. 50 00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:17,380 If you run away from here, he'll know that we're talking about him. 51 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:42,400 tomorrow night oh yeah it's uh five too early uh no i can't make it you 52 00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:47,020 can't no no something came up but i'd like to call you and talk to you about 53 00:03:47,020 --> 00:03:49,080 i mean well if you're gonna be home 54 00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:20,740 Pleasure. Oh, and thanks for waiting that extra hour until I got out of 55 00:04:20,740 --> 00:04:21,740 detention. 56 00:04:23,580 --> 00:04:25,440 Oh, here are your books. 57 00:04:25,720 --> 00:04:26,720 Thanks. 58 00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:32,700 Bye. Bye. 59 00:04:36,340 --> 00:04:41,560 Oh, I love this time of year. Right before the winter formal, girls get 60 00:05:09,390 --> 00:05:10,309 Just a minute. 61 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:11,310 Carol! 62 00:05:11,770 --> 00:05:12,770 Yes! 63 00:05:13,010 --> 00:05:14,010 It's for mine! 64 00:05:18,070 --> 00:05:19,070 What? 65 00:05:21,310 --> 00:05:22,310 It's Eddie. 66 00:05:22,530 --> 00:05:23,590 Well, hang it up. 67 00:05:24,550 --> 00:05:25,550 Carol, 68 00:05:26,730 --> 00:05:29,230 come on. You can't just hang up on every phone call. It's not for you. 69 00:05:30,850 --> 00:05:31,990 I did it again. 70 00:05:33,570 --> 00:05:34,570 Hello? 71 00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:36,510 No, I'm sorry. Ben's dead. 72 00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:39,240 to quote, formalize what she should bring you for lunch tomorrow. 73 00:06:40,300 --> 00:06:43,540 And Sheena called just to say, hey. 74 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:48,220 Well, what, only three messages? 75 00:06:49,820 --> 00:06:52,840 Michael, I think it's very unfair of you to lead these girls on. 76 00:06:53,160 --> 00:06:54,160 Lead them on? 77 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:55,660 Mom, look. 78 00:06:56,220 --> 00:06:59,220 Fact. The enrollment at Dewey High is three to one female. 79 00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:03,860 Fact. The dance of the year is coming up. And fact, even Porter has women 80 00:07:03,860 --> 00:07:04,860 calling him. 81 00:07:11,660 --> 00:07:12,660 Fuck that vicious attack. 82 00:07:12,940 --> 00:07:15,020 Carol, that wasn't very nice. What did Mike do? 83 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:16,320 Nothing. 84 00:07:16,700 --> 00:07:20,360 Nothing is right. He's just flying like every other male that's ever walked the 85 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:21,360 face of the earth. 86 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:25,560 Maybe you better handle this. 87 00:07:28,380 --> 00:07:30,860 Carol, you don't mean all men. 88 00:07:31,700 --> 00:07:32,700 Yes, I do. 89 00:07:33,860 --> 00:07:35,800 But it's very insulting to your father. 90 00:07:36,380 --> 00:07:38,080 I don't think of dad as a man. 91 00:07:44,780 --> 00:07:47,900 I mean, I'm talking about hot, good -looking guys. 92 00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:50,860 I sense a trend here. 93 00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:52,740 Oh, I get it. 94 00:07:53,020 --> 00:07:55,980 Bobby invited somebody else to this winter fling thing, huh? 95 00:07:56,940 --> 00:08:01,100 Typical of men who use women and then discard them like so much garbage. 96 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:03,560 You know, that really hurts, Carol. 97 00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:08,500 It hurts that you see me as a guy who treats girls very comely. 98 00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,260 Now, if you'll excuse me. 99 00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:14,640 I have to go return some phone calls and brighten the day of some very lucky 100 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:15,640 young ladies. 101 00:08:17,460 --> 00:08:20,840 So do you want to explain men to Carol or women to Mike? 102 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:23,380 I'd like someone to explain women to me. 103 00:08:25,020 --> 00:08:27,740 Just kidding. It's one of those charming, whimsical little remarks. 104 00:08:28,580 --> 00:08:29,580 Oh, Mike! 105 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:37,260 Oh, Carol, I'm so sorry that Bobby asked someone else. I don't know that he 106 00:08:37,260 --> 00:08:40,260 asked someone else. I don't know what his plans are. 107 00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:43,280 know that Bobby's always been a little shy. 108 00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:48,220 Oh, yeah, he wasn't so shy the other night when... Never mind. 109 00:08:50,260 --> 00:08:54,600 What other night? That's not the point. The point is the dance is only a week 110 00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:57,300 and a half away and he hasn't asked me yet. 111 00:08:58,300 --> 00:08:59,760 Maybe you should ask him. 112 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:05,280 The only kind of women who ask men to dances are the kind who don't shave 113 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:06,280 legs. 114 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:09,920 Carol, there's... 115 00:09:10,190 --> 00:09:14,170 Absolutely nothing wrong with a woman asking a man out on a date, and it is 116 00:09:14,170 --> 00:09:15,670 extremely easy to do. 117 00:09:16,270 --> 00:09:17,270 Oh, sure. 118 00:09:17,650 --> 00:09:18,650 It's true. 119 00:09:19,030 --> 00:09:20,030 Watch. 120 00:09:21,530 --> 00:09:22,530 Oh, Jason? 121 00:09:23,270 --> 00:09:24,270 Yeah? 122 00:09:24,490 --> 00:09:26,770 Would you like to go to the movies on Friday night? 123 00:09:39,630 --> 00:09:40,630 Where was I? 124 00:09:41,150 --> 00:09:44,270 Um, you were telling me that I was wrong to think that women don't make sense. 125 00:09:51,070 --> 00:09:54,150 I'm just saying it's a major mistake to follow your mother's advice. 126 00:09:54,390 --> 00:09:57,130 Yeah, if I followed my mother's advice, I'd be a Quaker. 127 00:09:57,970 --> 00:09:58,970 Hi, 128 00:10:00,690 --> 00:10:01,750 Bobby. Carol. 129 00:10:02,810 --> 00:10:05,170 Listen, we've been going out for what now, two months? 130 00:10:05,390 --> 00:10:06,590 Yeah. All right. 131 00:10:12,650 --> 00:10:16,250 Yeah. So we're really comfortable around each other and we don't have to put up 132 00:10:16,250 --> 00:10:17,250 any kind of act. 133 00:10:17,490 --> 00:10:18,490 Yeah. 134 00:10:18,630 --> 00:10:19,630 Great. 135 00:10:21,110 --> 00:10:27,810 So, if I were going to ask you to take me to the winter formal, you'd say... 136 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:15,440 Tasty combination of herbs and spices. Always remember to shake vigorously 137 00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:16,440 before opening. 138 00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:17,960 Oh, yeah. 139 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:20,980 What are you doing? 140 00:11:21,780 --> 00:11:22,780 I'm cooking. 141 00:11:22,940 --> 00:11:24,560 What does it look like? Oh, yeah. 142 00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:26,960 Hi, 143 00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:28,080 Mike. Hey, Mom. 144 00:11:28,540 --> 00:11:31,960 You know, Dad, this winter formal thing is going to be the death of me. Mm -hmm. 145 00:11:31,980 --> 00:11:35,500 Okay, all right. Now, if you had to choose between a blonde, a redhead, and 146 00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:36,760 brunette beauty, who would you pick? 147 00:11:38,110 --> 00:11:41,470 Well, Mike, there's much more to a woman than the color of her hair. 148 00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:46,210 There's also the size of her intellect. 149 00:11:49,930 --> 00:11:51,350 Hi, Carol, how was your day? 150 00:11:52,830 --> 00:11:55,570 Everything's fine now, really. I don't know what's been the matter with me 151 00:11:55,570 --> 00:11:58,230 lately. I mean, new clothes, makeup, contact lenses. 152 00:11:58,750 --> 00:12:02,750 Thinking someone would want to take me to a dance. Please, I mean, it's just 153 00:12:02,750 --> 00:12:06,770 me. I mean, what am I trying to change? I was just fine working hard and 154 00:12:06,770 --> 00:12:07,770 studying. 155 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:18,300 That means she didn't have a good day. 156 00:12:57,770 --> 00:12:58,770 What did Bobby say? 157 00:12:58,910 --> 00:13:01,490 Oh, how many times do I have to repeat it? 158 00:13:01,910 --> 00:13:04,190 Well, honey, maybe you just asked him too late. 159 00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:06,850 Honey, there has to be some reason. 160 00:13:08,750 --> 00:13:12,430 Yeah, me. I mean, just doesn't want to take me. 161 00:13:17,210 --> 00:13:20,690 Well, then he's out of his mind. And that's a professional opinion. 162 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:35,400 an IQ of 144, right? 163 00:13:38,020 --> 00:13:44,060 I want just five minutes with that football player without his protective 164 00:13:44,060 --> 00:13:45,060 equipment. 165 00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:50,620 Maggie, don't you get irrational, too? 166 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:53,580 Jason, it would be a nice gesture for you to get a little irrational. 167 00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:56,240 Okay, if you want to vent, go ahead and vent. 168 00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:58,260 Vent. One of us has to remain calm. 169 00:13:58,540 --> 00:14:02,380 One of us has to do thinking and observing and telling... What are you 170 00:14:02,380 --> 00:14:03,540 about? Well, I'm gonna... 171 00:14:04,330 --> 00:14:06,090 little slime bag sucker right now. 172 00:14:14,290 --> 00:14:16,810 Carol, honey, we want to leave in about five minutes. Are you almost ready? 173 00:14:17,670 --> 00:14:22,270 No, I am not. I do not want to go to some stupid place to take my mind off 174 00:14:22,270 --> 00:14:25,830 fact that there's some stupid dance tonight that I don't even care about. 175 00:14:26,930 --> 00:14:28,310 Six minutes will be fine. 176 00:14:29,950 --> 00:14:32,990 If you're looking for enthusiasm, it might help. 177 00:14:34,320 --> 00:14:38,140 Well, I don't think we can expect much enthusiasm out of Carol tonight. I was 178 00:14:38,140 --> 00:14:39,160 talking about me. 179 00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:44,120 Ben, why are you eating? I told you we were going out to dinner. 180 00:14:44,580 --> 00:14:47,040 No, we aren't. Where we're going, they don't have dinner. Shh! 181 00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:51,920 You tell our ten -year -old son where we're going, but you won't tell me? 182 00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:55,640 Don't take it personally, Mom. No woman can keep a secret. 183 00:14:57,880 --> 00:15:00,800 Where would he get such a ridiculous idea? 184 00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:32,300 I mean, who's kidding her, Dad? I've lost sleep over this. 185 00:15:32,540 --> 00:15:34,740 There's only one decision that seemed to make any sense. 186 00:15:38,500 --> 00:15:39,500 Excuse me. 187 00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:44,440 Hello, Mike. 188 00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,620 Hello. How do you do? Hey. 189 00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:57,480 Mom, Dad, this is the stunning Samantha, lovely Andrea, and the legendary Sheena 190 00:15:57,480 --> 00:15:58,480 Berkowitz. 191 00:16:01,930 --> 00:16:03,230 The whole crowd of you. 192 00:16:04,470 --> 00:16:05,470 Cheese. 193 00:16:06,190 --> 00:16:09,630 Okay, Mom, Dad, we'll see you guys a little bit later. Oh, and there's no 194 00:16:09,630 --> 00:16:10,469 to wait up. 195 00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:13,650 So, who wants to drive? Me. I get to sit in the back with Mike. 196 00:16:13,990 --> 00:16:14,990 Who's dead? 197 00:16:17,110 --> 00:16:18,450 Well, say something. 198 00:16:19,430 --> 00:16:20,430 That's my boy. 199 00:16:22,470 --> 00:16:25,790 Oh, look at Carol. Doesn't she look beautiful? 200 00:16:26,150 --> 00:16:30,110 Oh, honey, you are perfectly dressed for a wonderful evening of... 201 00:16:30,890 --> 00:16:31,890 Something or other. 202 00:16:32,690 --> 00:16:36,290 I hate this whole entire gross, disgusting idea. 203 00:16:38,150 --> 00:16:40,950 You're going to have more fun tonight than you've had since you were six years 204 00:16:40,950 --> 00:16:42,030 old. Come on. 205 00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:45,770 I'm going to puke. 206 00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:25,400 The night is young. 207 00:17:26,099 --> 00:17:27,220 Pish, tosh. 208 00:17:27,579 --> 00:17:29,740 When are we getting to the surprise destination? 209 00:17:30,420 --> 00:17:31,420 This is it. 210 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:32,600 You're kidding. 211 00:17:32,780 --> 00:17:34,200 No, we isn't. Surprise! 212 00:17:36,380 --> 00:17:39,780 Don't you remember when you were six years old, we came over here, and you 213 00:17:39,780 --> 00:17:44,680 looked through that very telescope, and you said, Daddy, there must be magic up 214 00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:46,500 here. Even New Jersey looks pretty. 215 00:17:52,170 --> 00:17:55,450 I just thought maybe you could use a little magic tonight. Maybe your old dad 216 00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:56,450 could help out. 217 00:17:58,270 --> 00:18:00,390 Okay, who wants a King Kong souvenir? 218 00:18:01,050 --> 00:18:01,809 Me, me, me. 219 00:18:01,810 --> 00:18:02,950 How did I know that? 220 00:18:07,510 --> 00:18:10,450 Well, it really is beautiful up here. 221 00:18:11,670 --> 00:18:16,390 Oh, look at all those little cars. They look like little... Aunt, I know, Mom, 222 00:18:16,390 --> 00:18:17,390 please. 223 00:18:18,190 --> 00:18:19,910 Carol, your father met well. 224 00:18:21,740 --> 00:18:25,880 did, but thinking that the magic of the Empire State Building would make me 225 00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:28,060 forget that was totally humiliating. 226 00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:31,220 Makes Dad seem kind of lame. 227 00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:38,180 No. Yes, I heard you. No, no, no, honey. Even if I thought that, I would never, 228 00:18:38,240 --> 00:18:40,980 ever, ever call your father. Wait. Don't say it again. 229 00:18:41,700 --> 00:18:44,140 Okay, but it is lame. 230 00:18:45,680 --> 00:18:49,800 Well, yes, but we never had this conversation. 231 00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:51,640 What conversation? 232 00:18:57,080 --> 00:18:59,320 Why is your father talking to that janitor? 233 00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:07,480 Oh, that's just Bobby with a... Bobby with a... Oh, 234 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:10,800 Lord, forgive me for what I said about Jason, and don't ever let him know. 235 00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:14,600 Well, it's bringing him over here. 236 00:19:27,340 --> 00:19:30,300 Your father promised me he wouldn't tell nobody I was working here. 237 00:19:30,980 --> 00:19:32,320 I didn't tell a soul. 238 00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:33,800 He told you that? 239 00:19:34,060 --> 00:19:35,060 When he called me. 240 00:19:35,220 --> 00:19:36,179 You called him? 241 00:19:36,180 --> 00:19:37,180 Yeah, yelling. 242 00:19:39,540 --> 00:19:42,540 This job is why you couldn't take me to the dance? 243 00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:44,900 Why else wouldn't I take you? 244 00:19:46,020 --> 00:19:47,020 Well, I don't know. 245 00:19:59,110 --> 00:20:03,990 Mr. Stever, if it's okay, can I drive Carol home? I mean, I get off work at 11 246 00:20:03,990 --> 00:20:07,470 'clock. Oh, gee, Bobby, I don't... Dad! 247 00:20:09,230 --> 00:20:11,310 Don't be too late. We won't. 248 00:20:12,170 --> 00:20:13,170 Thanks, 249 00:20:14,750 --> 00:20:15,750 Dad. 250 00:20:24,130 --> 00:20:25,230 Oh, honey. 251 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:30,640 Ever thought your whole idea was... Lame. Oh, I never thought that. 252 00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:32,960 Well, 253 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:36,380 why didn't you tell me you had to work? 254 00:20:37,220 --> 00:20:42,300 I didn't want anybody to know that Bobby Winnett, captain of the football team, 255 00:20:42,460 --> 00:20:44,280 had a job doing that. 256 00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:47,280 Especially you. 257 00:20:51,300 --> 00:20:52,420 I don't mind. 258 00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:55,760 Disgusting. 259 00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:57,940 Don't worry, I'm used to disgusting. 260 00:20:58,300 --> 00:20:59,860 Remember I have two brothers? 261 00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:06,060 Carol, I really wanted to take you to that dance. 262 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:08,260 I really wanted to go with you. 263 00:21:11,660 --> 00:21:12,660 Wait here. 264 00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:22,360 I know this isn't going to be too clear. 265 00:21:44,430 --> 00:21:45,430 Okay, 266 00:21:53,950 --> 00:21:54,950 I'm ready. 267 00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:47,420 Yeah, well, I had a lousy time, too. Who needs any of you? You're a total pig. 268 00:22:47,780 --> 00:22:49,440 The worst night of my life. 269 00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:53,200 Women. 270 00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:56,520 You said it. 20642

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