All language subtitles for George Lopez s04e20 Needs Anchor Manageme

Pussy!

George, I can't believe you're letting
Max watch this movie.

It's completely inappropriate.

No, I'm teaching him a life lesson.

You see, son, it doesn't matter how much
you love a woman.

When an alien lays eggs in her body, you
gotta cut her head off.

George, don't fill his head full of that
junk. Turn on the news.

The family dog that dug up the charred,
headless corpse.

In local news, another fire damaged an
apartment. Wait a minute.

I know him. That's Spencer Vogel.

Who? A boy I dated in Miami right before
I moved to L .A.

My first real love.

Really? What happened?

I dumped him.

You dumped him, but you kept this?

What's so special about him?

You put some lights in here, put me in
makeup.

Welcome back to Live Room News. I'm
Jorge Lopez.

Tonight's top story.

Angie sees another old boyfriend who is
now clearly gay.

I'll bet that anchor guy makes a lot of
money, Dad.

Yeah, but he spends it all on faith,
Liv.

It looks like every story surprises him.

We'll be right back with sports.

get to kiss them? He's got those big,
full lips.

Yeah, they're full all right.

They're full of fat they suck from his
ass.

I just want to thank the Action 8 news
team for welcoming me into their family.

And you folks for welcoming me into your
home.

Good night, L .A.

What a jerk.

George, that's so sweet.

You're jealous.

Why should I be jealous?

I won.

He might have pumped the tires, but I'm
riding the bike.

if the bike makes a call and
congratulates Spencer on his success.

Go ahead, call him. I will.

I don't care.

Because I know who I am inside.

I'm self -centered and secure.

you something, George. Harness racing is
fixed, okay? Just leave it at that.

Hi, is this Channel 8? I'm calling for
Spencer Vogel.

This is Angie Palmero. He'll remember
me.

Palmero? He doesn't know me as Angie
Lopez.

He doesn't even know you exist. Excuse
me.

Spencer Vogel? The new man candy on
Channel 8?

How does Angie know him?

He's from Miami. They used to date in
high school.

She dumped him for me.

And I thought I couldn't pick a horse.

Hey, that was fast.

Well, he couldn't talk, but he was so
excited to hear from me. We're going to

lunch tomorrow.

That'll be fun, huh? Lunch with the
anchorman?

In breaking news, our waitress just
informed us our salads will be right up.

George, are you okay with this? Because
if it's going to bother you, I don't

have to have lunch with Spencer.

Angie, please, come on, I'm fine. Go
ahead. Okay.

And now a word from the devil.

Don't worry, George.

She is not going to leave you for this
guy.

I know that.

She's just going to meet him in a hotel.

And she will look back on it as the one
time in her life when she really felt

like a woman.

Hey, hey, hey.

I make my wife feel like a woman every
Friday night.

Unless she's got an avocado mask.

Then every time I see her, I get so
hungry, I want to dip a chip on her

Just don't say I didn't warn you.

Mom, just because my father cheated on
you doesn't mean that everyone cheats.

Oh, you're right.

What do I know about people? You know
what? Maybe your father didn't even

on me.

You know, maybe that truckload of
panties really did tip over on the

Angie's not going to risk losing me.

Our marriage is solid.

It's built on love and trust.

And that equity loan on the house that's
in her name could, like, convince her

we're a team.

George.

I'm just saying, crap happens, okay?

And you might want to get yourself a
lawyer. Mom. And a good one. You know,

that little bulldog that saved Kobe's
nuggets.

Get a little higher.

Like that.

Oh, hey, George.

Call the police, man. There's a
supermodel trying to steal Angie's

Thank you, Ernie.

Hey, that's what you wore to lunch with
Spencer?

What are you, shooting a tool calendar
after dessert?

Come on, he's taking me to that new
place, Onyx. I want to look good.

How come you don't wear that kind of
stuff when I take you to lunch?

Well, okay, I will, as long as you lean
back and let the kid working the drive

-thru see me, too.

Hey, Angie, Angie.

Ask Spencer if he can get me an
autograph from that new weather girl,

Fujimoto.

Ma 'am, my three -day forecast for her
is hot, hot, hot.

And then the cold shower is cooling down
my downtown area.

Oh, don't forget I'm meeting some
clients for a wedding rehearsal right

lunch, but I'll see you at dinner.

Oh, have fun.

What do you mean have fun? Whose side
are you on?

I'm not taking sides. I'm just having
lunch with the guy.

Golly.

You know what?

Let's see how she feels when I go with
one of my exes.

What are you doing?

In the yearbook.

I remember a few girls who signed it who
still might want to grab a seat on the

G train.

Wish I could have known you better.

Wish I could have known you better.

Who are you?

Hey, dude, thanks for letting me hide
behind your big head in math.

Here we go.

Remember Cindy Coronado? Oh, she was
super hot.

Check out what she wrote.

George, you rock.

You rock harder than Eddie Van Halen and
David Lee Roth put together.

I'm sorry I never went out with you.

I'll regret it the rest of my life.

Yeah, well, that's cool and everything,
but isn't that your handwriting?

It's a little squiggly like that.

Yeah, right. I suppose I put my mom's
lipstick on and kissed the page, too.

Hey, wait a minute.

Why do you need to make Angie jealous
anyway?

If you were the biggest loser in the
world back then and you got her, what

you worried about now?

Yeah, you're right.

I'm better now than I ever was.

Spencer needs three hours in makeup. I
wake up and I'm like this.

I'm glad you're here.

I was sorely ambitious with my bike
route and I need a ride home.

Gentlemen, I have destroyed my scrotum.

Well, talk to my mom, Vic. I'm sure
she's got an extra pair laying around

somewhere.

Hey, man, what do you remember about
Angie's old boyfriend, Spencer Vogel?

Is he still talking about him?

He was a loser going nowhere.

I will never understand why she was so
devastated when he broke up with her.

Wait a minute.

I thought she broke up with him. Oh, no.

She was wild for him.

She cried and cried, but I told her that
the attraction was just physical and

the looks were meaningless.

Evidently, the lesson sunk in.

She lied to me.

George, that was 20 years ago. What
difference does it make who dumped who?

Because if he dumped her, she could
still have a thing for him. He's the one

that got away.

Oh, man, that's why she went out with
me.

She dropped the level so she'd never get
dumped again.

Now what are you doing? I'm going to the
restaurant.

George, that's crazy.

Look, Angie is the most important thing
in my life. And I'm not going to let

some rich, good -looking dude make a
move on her.

God, I drove her to this.

You know, last night she was wearing the
avocado mask and rollers.

And she had a little leg stubble.

I should have just pictured Salma Hayek
and went for it.

George,

George, calm down.

Calm down. You're too upset.

You're going to go in there and you're
going to make a fool out of yourself.

Look, Angie's in there and I got to stop
him before it's too late. It's a

restaurant. What could they be doing?

of our finest wine. As you wish, sir.

I'm going in there. Can I help you?

Yeah, I'm with the Vogel party.

I don't have any Vogel party here.

Oh, try Palmaro.

I don't have them either.

That's impossible, man. She's got to be
in there.

I'm sorry. You know, my friend, he just
needs to talk to his wife.

Yeah, they're working through some
stuff.

I'm sure he'll be right back.

I tried some sushi once.

Yeah. I was sick for four days, but, you
know, I'm not blaming you.

So what's the deal with the no -shoe
thing?

She's not in there.

She lied to me again.

Where did she go with Vogel?

My mom's right.

She's cheating on me.

broken, too.

I get up about 11.

What say you, me, and your buddy jump in
a car? We go to Vegas.

Get some party girls and turn this whole
thing around.

Yeah, I'm in.

Find a ride home, Ernie. I'm gonna go
look for my wife.

So we can still go to Vegas?

I just have to call my mom and let her
know I won't be home.

You know what? Me too.

Okay,

when you're walking down the aisle,
remember to smile. This is your

wedding day, the beginning of a
beautiful life together.

You know, I've been married 18 happy
years, and each day is better than the

last.

I know you're sleeping with the
anchorman.

This will just take a second.

Lost your mind?

I'm working here.

Look, you have been lying to me. I know
you didn't dump Spencer. Spencer dumped

you. Who cares? It was a long time ago.
It doesn't matter now. And it certainly

doesn't mean that I was sleeping with
him.

Then what about today's lie?

I've been looking for you for two hours,
Angie. What have you been doing with

Spencer? Because you didn't have lunch
with him.

What happened?

What's bad? Heart beating faster?

Starting to sweat?

Beating little eyes looking all over the
room.

The answer's not over there. Look over
here, liar.

There's nothing going on between me and
Spencer. And I can explain it at home,

when I'm not working.

No, I want to know now. This is not the
time or the place to discuss this.

Angie!

Sorry. Now, where were we, hmm?

I called yesterday. He didn't even want
to have lunch. He told me to get over

it. I was humiliated. Are you happy?

Angie, I don't think this is the time or
place to air our dirty laundry.

Marriage. Hey, got a lot to look forward
to. Peaks and valleys.

Love you.

I know I acted like an idiot, but I
wouldn't have gone down there if you

lie to me in the first place.

George, how could I possibly tell you
the truth?

How could I tell you that he dumped me
and he never wanted to see me again?

You put me on this pedestal like I'm
some kind of goddess.

And I always wanted you to believe that
you won the prize. That caught me on the

rebound from Spencer.

I did this for you, George.

Oh, so close!

I bet the only reason you called him in
the first place was to make me jealous.

No. I wanted to know why the hell he
dumped me.

No one's ever dumped Angie Palmaro. I'm
a prize, damn it!

Look, I know that. Angie, why do you
think I got so freaked out when I

might lose you?

Look, everything good in my life is
because of you.

You've never said that before.

Well, I'm never going to say it again,
so I hope you enjoy it.

Spencer Vogel is not half the man you
are.

Why are we still talking about Spencer
Vogel?

Look, it's a long story, and it makes
Angie look bad, so I'm going to tell it

anyway.

She saw Spencer on TV and called him up
to have lunch.

What? He cannot do that.

He cannot break the contract.

What contract?

What contract? Daddy.

It's water under the bridge.

Forget it.

I will call Spencer right now.

He probably won't take the call.

What does it matter? It's a small thing,
really. I paid him $10

,000 to break it off with you and never
see you again.

What?

You paid him to get out of my life?

How dare you?

Yeah, how dare you?

Hey, man, you hated my guts, so you
never offered me a dime.

on your Def Leppard T -shirt, struggling
to read a comic book, and I thought,

well, he'll destroy himself.

This changes everything.

No, it doesn't, Angie. I mean, if your
dad hadn't have paid Spencer off, we

never would have met.

This means that we were meant to be
together.

Not that.

It means I've never been dumped.

I did the right thing.

He was a loser.

So, George, what would you have done if
I had offered you $10 ,000

to never see Angie again?

Look, I can't believe you're saying
this.

I mean, this offends me.

And $200 ,000 small?

Non -sequential ways.

Under the lemon tree.

Tomorrow morning.

You won't be contacted again.

Face it. Deep down, all men are
cheaters.

more insulting if you hadn't just pulled
an ace out of your sleeve.

Benny, that's not true.

I was completely faithful.

It was my wife who cheated on me. Well,
that's just because she was the man in

the relationship.

That hurts coming from another man.

Hey, you know, I'll be honest. I've been
tempted to cheat before.

Dude, flipping the magazine from one
bride to another is not cheating.

I'd never cheat on Angie. I mean, I know
how good I got it.

Guys, it's getting late. You should wrap
it up. Come on.

Hey, where are you guys going?

Hi.

Hi, baby.

So,

it's Friday night.

You ready to come to bed?

I'll be right there, baby.