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1
00:00:04,460 --> 00:00:08,080
I'll be free when you want me. I'll be
ready.
2
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:12,560
I'll be free when you want me. I'll be
ready.
3
00:00:17,740 --> 00:00:19,620
You know I like you.
4
00:00:29,300 --> 00:00:33,100
I'll be free when you want me. I'll be
ready.
5
00:00:34,150 --> 00:00:37,230
I'll be free when you want me. I'll be
free.
6
00:00:38,270 --> 00:00:40,190
You know I'm right for you.
7
00:00:40,630 --> 00:00:41,950
I'll be free.
8
00:00:45,010 --> 00:00:47,550
I'll be free.
9
00:00:49,530 --> 00:00:51,250
Why did I
10
00:00:51,250 --> 00:00:59,270
spell
11
00:00:59,270 --> 00:01:00,270
my computer?
12
00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:04,140
Why would you use your own?
13
00:01:04,599 --> 00:01:06,120
Because I don't have Wi -Fi in my room.
14
00:01:06,380 --> 00:01:09,840
I want to buy wireless, but you told me
to fuck off or pay for it myself because
15
00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:11,120
you're already stealing the signal from
upstairs.
16
00:01:12,060 --> 00:01:14,580
Not my fault you wanted a loft that
doesn't get a signal.
17
00:01:15,460 --> 00:01:16,460
You're a jerk, man.
18
00:01:17,340 --> 00:01:18,340
Dickface.
19
00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:23,580
Can't believe you never thought about
doing this.
20
00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:27,000
I've never even heard of online one
-nighters .com.
21
00:01:27,380 --> 00:01:28,480
Seems a little weird to me.
22
00:01:29,460 --> 00:01:31,460
Not too weird for Stephanie, apparently.
23
00:01:32,620 --> 00:01:34,240
You're just mad that she's moved on.
24
00:01:34,520 --> 00:01:36,120
She hasn't moved on.
25
00:01:36,580 --> 00:01:38,100
She's just trying to make me jealous.
26
00:01:39,180 --> 00:01:40,720
It's so not working.
27
00:01:42,660 --> 00:01:44,400
Why? Did she say something?
28
00:01:44,980 --> 00:01:46,480
Maybe. Well, what?
29
00:01:48,800 --> 00:01:49,800
I hate you.
30
00:01:50,500 --> 00:01:55,980
Alright, I posted my ad under
miscellaneous encounters. You post your
31
00:01:57,880 --> 00:01:58,920
I don't know, man.
32
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:01,240
Maybe I'll try calling Maddie again.
33
00:02:04,590 --> 00:02:05,670
Why? Okay, okay.
34
00:02:06,130 --> 00:02:07,370
So what am I supposed to write?
35
00:02:10,830 --> 00:02:11,930
I don't know what to say.
36
00:02:13,630 --> 00:02:14,630
Write something.
37
00:02:17,630 --> 00:02:19,270
I can't think of anything, man. I'm
blocked.
38
00:02:22,730 --> 00:02:23,730
Hey, what did you write?
39
00:02:25,210 --> 00:02:26,210
Fuck rush.
40
00:02:26,610 --> 00:02:27,710
Why are you yelling?
41
00:02:28,530 --> 00:02:29,530
Sorry, man.
42
00:02:29,710 --> 00:02:32,890
You're just like a four -year -old. You
know that? You're just like a four -year
43
00:02:32,890 --> 00:02:33,890
-old. I said I'm sorry.
44
00:02:35,950 --> 00:02:36,950
Be yourself.
45
00:02:37,890 --> 00:02:40,010
Alright, whatever you think a girl will
respond to.
46
00:02:41,430 --> 00:02:42,590
Hurry the fuck up.
47
00:02:43,390 --> 00:02:44,510
Get out of my room.
48
00:02:47,710 --> 00:02:50,310
Pass your bedtime, you fucking toddler.
49
00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:58,450
I didn't even get to audition.
50
00:02:59,210 --> 00:03:01,830
Captain and director said I looked
nothing like my headshot.
51
00:03:02,370 --> 00:03:03,490
Then she told me to leave.
52
00:03:03,790 --> 00:03:06,310
Really? Yeah, so she told me to go home.
53
00:03:07,070 --> 00:03:09,770
Yeah, you definitely could use some new
headshots.
54
00:03:11,150 --> 00:03:14,330
Why don't you try on that blue blouse?
It makes you look kind of frumpy.
55
00:03:14,650 --> 00:03:17,010
And believe me, you definitely don't
look frumpy.
56
00:03:17,690 --> 00:03:18,990
You have to get what you pay for.
57
00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:35,960
Josie's drummer took him for free, so I
couldn't just... Josie was your lover in
58
00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:36,960
Seattle? Is.
59
00:03:37,700 --> 00:03:39,300
Was. I don't know.
60
00:03:39,980 --> 00:03:41,160
Still figuring it out?
61
00:03:41,500 --> 00:03:42,940
Still looking for the right girl.
62
00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:44,600
Or guy.
63
00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:47,360
That's right.
64
00:03:48,540 --> 00:03:49,840
You like guys, too.
65
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:52,960
If they're worthy.
66
00:03:54,260 --> 00:03:55,840
And how do you know when a guy's worthy?
67
00:03:56,180 --> 00:03:57,180
I just know.
68
00:03:58,800 --> 00:03:59,739
All right.
69
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:00,740
Sit up straight.
70
00:04:01,350 --> 00:04:02,350
Chin up.
71
00:04:03,050 --> 00:04:05,170
Bite down, but keep your lips partially
open.
72
00:04:12,530 --> 00:04:16,269
I love Josie, but I felt so suffocated.
73
00:04:17,329 --> 00:04:18,430
Doesn't have to be that way.
74
00:04:18,829 --> 00:04:21,089
Easy for you to say, Mr. Open
Relationship.
75
00:04:24,910 --> 00:04:25,910
Perfect.
76
00:04:26,690 --> 00:04:29,650
I don't think I'd be able to be with
someone special knowing that they were
77
00:04:29,650 --> 00:04:30,650
sleeping with someone else.
78
00:04:31,690 --> 00:04:32,690
I don't blame her, though.
79
00:04:33,030 --> 00:04:34,090
Rick is pretty hot.
80
00:04:34,990 --> 00:04:39,230
I knew she went camping with him, but is
she sleeping with Rick now?
81
00:04:39,830 --> 00:04:40,830
Yeah.
82
00:04:41,270 --> 00:04:43,350
I'm sorry. I thought you already knew.
83
00:04:44,150 --> 00:04:45,150
No.
84
00:04:45,490 --> 00:04:46,490
I didn't.
85
00:04:47,270 --> 00:04:49,350
But it doesn't surprise me.
86
00:04:51,110 --> 00:04:52,110
Lacey's special.
87
00:04:52,390 --> 00:04:53,630
I don't want to hold her back.
88
00:04:56,350 --> 00:04:57,970
She can sleep with anyone she wants.
89
00:04:58,870 --> 00:04:59,870
And you?
90
00:05:00,410 --> 00:05:01,410
Same deal.
91
00:05:03,150 --> 00:05:07,570
I can too You think I'm worthy?
92
00:05:08,890 --> 00:05:09,890
Let's find out
93
00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:14,840
Still think I'm worthy?
94
00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:27,460
Make sure you get those measurements
perfect.
95
00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:31,800
Oh, please, honey. I'm so tall on with
inches and feet. I don't even need a
96
00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:32,799
measuring tape.
97
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:33,800
Gray or blue?
98
00:09:34,580 --> 00:09:39,360
Oh. Oh, my God. Somebody call the Bronx
Zoo and tell them that I found their
99
00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:40,360
missing rhino.
100
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:41,480
Whatever, Jeffrey.
101
00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:44,080
You've measured the last five male
models.
102
00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:48,280
Fair's fair. I'm going to finish this
one, and you run along and go and pack
103
00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:49,920
those boxes of fabric that you ordered.
104
00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:54,980
Do you realize that I'm wearing
Roberto's premium denim?
105
00:09:55,860 --> 00:09:59,460
If there's even one more hole than
Roberto planned there to be, you'll be
106
00:09:59,460 --> 00:10:01,840
walking the streets of the meatpacking
district to pay for them.
107
00:10:02,540 --> 00:10:03,540
Gray or blue?
108
00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:07,300
Not my fault that you bought jeans two
sizes too small.
109
00:10:08,060 --> 00:10:10,960
All this pressure from the spring
collection is making you retain water.
110
00:10:12,439 --> 00:10:13,500
Relax, you look fine.
111
00:10:14,180 --> 00:10:17,840
Anyway, I'll have you know, I never work
the meatpacking district.
112
00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:20,340
I am strictly a Times Square gal.
113
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,120
Right, sugar?
114
00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:25,320
Gray or blue?
115
00:10:25,700 --> 00:10:28,400
Oh, for Christ's sakes, gray. You know
it's the new black.
116
00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:31,660
Just because you gained a little weight
doesn't give you the right to snap at
117
00:10:31,660 --> 00:10:32,660
me, sister.
118
00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:33,980
I'm taking a smoke break.
119
00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:35,360
You don't smoke.
120
00:10:35,740 --> 00:10:36,740
So what?
121
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:39,820
There's too much estrogen in here for
even the view to handle.
122
00:10:42,990 --> 00:10:43,990
Do it in.
123
00:11:14,410 --> 00:11:15,410
Are you the handyman?
124
00:11:15,850 --> 00:11:21,170
Why, yes, ma 'am. I heard it's an extra
hard job, so I made sure to bring my
125
00:11:21,170 --> 00:11:22,690
biggest tools.
126
00:11:23,490 --> 00:11:25,930
Well, yeah, I did say you were well
-equipped.
127
00:11:26,290 --> 00:11:27,290
Follow me.
128
00:11:34,350 --> 00:11:36,130
Let me show you what needs some
attention.
129
00:11:37,430 --> 00:11:38,850
I've got this plumbing problem.
130
00:11:40,050 --> 00:11:43,510
The water turns on, but I can't seem to
make it hot.
131
00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:46,160
I can't believe this.
132
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:48,540
What's that?
133
00:11:49,140 --> 00:11:50,620
Can't believe you're having this
problem.
134
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:55,920
Terrible. But, uh, plumbing is my
specialty.
135
00:11:57,240 --> 00:11:59,600
So, you know how to make it hot, then?
136
00:12:00,060 --> 00:12:01,060
Oh, yeah.
137
00:12:03,660 --> 00:12:05,760
Oops, you dropped your tool belt.
138
00:12:08,320 --> 00:12:09,480
Thank you, God.
139
00:14:03,020 --> 00:14:04,020
Fuck me.
140
00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:24,000
On the kitchen table.
141
00:14:43,180 --> 00:14:44,180
Fuck you.
142
00:14:48,740 --> 00:14:49,180
Fuck
143
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:56,860
me
144
00:14:56,860 --> 00:14:57,860
on the counter.
145
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:53,919
That was good.
146
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:54,920
It's amazing.
147
00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:56,040
It's hot.
148
00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:12,100
Nailed it!
149
00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:13,320
Hammered it home!
150
00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:14,520
What? Yeah!
151
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,100
Woo!
152
00:16:16,500 --> 00:16:17,500
Gripped it.
153
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:18,560
Tightened it.
154
00:16:18,700 --> 00:16:19,499
Plunged it.
155
00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:21,340
Put my snake in the drain.
156
00:16:22,380 --> 00:16:24,360
Who? Are you talking about your internet
date?
157
00:16:25,520 --> 00:16:26,600
OnlineOneNighters .com.
158
00:16:26,980 --> 00:16:28,180
It was amazing.
159
00:16:28,700 --> 00:16:30,660
She was amazing.
160
00:16:30,980 --> 00:16:37,240
Really? Yeah. I propose a toast to a new
era and a new slogan for us.
161
00:16:38,900 --> 00:16:40,040
Miscellaneous Encounters.
162
00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:44,360
Yeah, I'm not quite encountering yet.
163
00:16:44,780 --> 00:16:46,840
I haven't received one response to my
ad.
164
00:16:47,060 --> 00:16:48,060
Not one?
165
00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:49,560
Not one. Damn.
166
00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:51,180
What'd your ad say?
167
00:16:52,010 --> 00:16:53,310
Exactly what you told me to write.
168
00:16:53,790 --> 00:16:55,170
What did I tell you to write?
169
00:16:55,630 --> 00:17:00,150
Just be yourself and write whatever a
girl would respond to.
170
00:17:00,370 --> 00:17:01,410
Are you kidding me?
171
00:17:01,870 --> 00:17:03,350
I was joking.
172
00:17:03,670 --> 00:17:06,050
I was shit -faced, you dumbass.
173
00:17:07,150 --> 00:17:12,050
Yeah, she wrote that you like comic book
conventions, reading anime and baseball
174
00:17:12,050 --> 00:17:13,050
games.
175
00:17:13,250 --> 00:17:18,130
So what? I do like those things. And you
sign it, just looking for love.
176
00:17:19,050 --> 00:17:21,109
What? I thought women liked romance.
177
00:17:21,819 --> 00:17:25,980
Not the ones on online one -nighters
.com, you idiot. Shut up, dick.
178
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:28,440
Women want fantasy.
179
00:17:29,540 --> 00:17:31,180
Just read the one that I wrote.
180
00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:38,140
Single, self -employed male who loves to
role -play as a daytime handyman in
181
00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:42,980
order to fulfill the needs of like
-minded, beautiful women. Wow, bullshit.
182
00:17:44,540 --> 00:17:48,320
Women who want one -night stands don't
want to know anything real about you.
183
00:17:49,260 --> 00:17:52,480
Like how Stephanie didn't want to know
anything about you after your one night
184
00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:53,480
stand?
185
00:17:54,980 --> 00:17:56,020
Low blow, my friend.
186
00:17:57,180 --> 00:17:58,640
But I'm still going to help you out.
187
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:01,020
Because you're a toddler in the ways of
the world.
188
00:18:01,340 --> 00:18:02,920
Take one of my responses.
189
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:05,160
Tell her to meet you at Dukin's.
190
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:06,960
Don't blow it.
191
00:18:07,980 --> 00:18:10,320
Oh, and tell her to wear a red t -shirt.
192
00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:13,520
So you can assess her hotness from
across the room.
193
00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:17,960
Okay.
194
00:18:34,030 --> 00:18:35,070
What the hell is this?
195
00:18:41,470 --> 00:18:42,590
This is a nightmare.
196
00:18:44,670 --> 00:18:45,670
Oh, hey.
197
00:18:46,550 --> 00:18:47,550
That's where you're going.
198
00:18:47,750 --> 00:18:49,370
It hurt someone with a gun.
199
00:18:50,450 --> 00:18:51,450
What did you say?
200
00:18:51,790 --> 00:18:55,850
Uh, nothing. Just be careful, will you?
That's not what you said, asshole.
201
00:18:56,350 --> 00:19:00,430
How would you like the entire Midtown
Women's Firefighter softball team to
202
00:19:00,430 --> 00:19:01,430
your ass?
203
00:19:01,670 --> 00:19:02,930
I hate softball.
204
00:19:06,250 --> 00:19:07,250
Oh, sorry.
205
00:19:07,830 --> 00:19:09,210
No, my apologies.
206
00:19:09,990 --> 00:19:12,190
Is that a red shirt underneath your
jacket?
207
00:19:12,990 --> 00:19:14,350
Uh, depends.
208
00:19:14,830 --> 00:19:15,830
On what?
209
00:19:16,130 --> 00:19:17,570
Do you play softball?
210
00:19:17,790 --> 00:19:19,030
I hate softball.
211
00:19:20,570 --> 00:19:21,570
Alright.
212
00:19:39,260 --> 00:19:41,900
Semper Fidelis Fidelibus Amoribus.
213
00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:45,580
Always faithful to you, my love.
214
00:19:46,300 --> 00:19:47,300
Anyone I know?
215
00:19:48,820 --> 00:19:50,660
Nope. I just like the way it sounds.
216
00:19:52,580 --> 00:19:53,580
Beautiful.
217
00:19:54,460 --> 00:19:56,500
My father made me take Latin in high
school.
218
00:19:56,860 --> 00:19:58,180
The one thing he gave me.
219
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:01,740
We haven't talked since you've been
back.
220
00:20:02,300 --> 00:20:03,540
How'd the shoot with Jason go?
221
00:20:03,860 --> 00:20:04,900
It's your second one, right?
222
00:20:06,700 --> 00:20:07,700
It was alright.
223
00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:09,720
It's all right.
224
00:20:10,820 --> 00:20:12,520
He said it went extremely well.
225
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:13,900
He never says that.
226
00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:15,440
Really?
227
00:20:16,860 --> 00:20:17,860
Say anything else?
228
00:20:18,660 --> 00:20:22,560
That your head shots were fabulous, that
you're a natural in front of the
229
00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:25,180
camera, and that you should model for us
some more.
230
00:20:26,820 --> 00:20:27,820
Are you interested?
231
00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:30,600
In modeling for me?
232
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:35,480
Um... Maybe.
233
00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:38,120
Mind if I think about it?
234
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:39,600
No pressure.
235
00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:41,680
Is there anything you want to talk
about?
236
00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:45,840
No, I'm actually pretty beat.
237
00:20:46,220 --> 00:20:48,420
But, um, thanks for the nightcap.
238
00:20:50,460 --> 00:20:51,760
Night. Night.
239
00:20:57,040 --> 00:20:58,920
Always faithful to you, Milla.
240
00:21:10,860 --> 00:21:11,860
Hey, dude.
241
00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:15,340
Boom, bam, pow, shot the locker.
242
00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:16,640
Boom, bang.
243
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:20,320
Looks like the red team made it home
safely.
244
00:21:20,620 --> 00:21:22,220
Yes, we did thank you very much.
245
00:21:22,780 --> 00:21:26,180
Cody, me, Nina, and Nina, this is Cody.
246
00:21:26,540 --> 00:21:28,360
But your dad said your name was Cody.
247
00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:33,660
Yeah, I mean, we're both Cody. Both
named Cody?
248
00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:35,040
Yeah.
249
00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:37,580
Right. But I'm not surprised.
250
00:21:39,670 --> 00:21:41,110
Wouldn't use my real name online either.
251
00:21:42,110 --> 00:21:43,810
You've had misleading encounters before?
252
00:21:44,250 --> 00:21:45,250
No way.
253
00:21:45,270 --> 00:21:48,170
I just want to see what kind of guy
would write a cheesy porno line like
254
00:21:48,170 --> 00:21:49,170
and expect it to work.
255
00:21:50,110 --> 00:21:51,230
It did work.
256
00:21:52,030 --> 00:21:53,030
Let me guess.
257
00:21:53,330 --> 00:21:56,510
You're the real Cody, and you're the
nice best friend who needs help getting
258
00:21:56,510 --> 00:21:57,510
laid.
259
00:21:57,550 --> 00:21:59,150
Yep, that would be me, Russ.
260
00:21:59,870 --> 00:22:01,930
Well, Russ, here we are.
261
00:22:02,310 --> 00:22:03,730
How about you show me the way to your
bedroom?
262
00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:17,700
And skip the tool belt.
263
00:22:27,860 --> 00:22:29,380
I thought they had a TV.
264
00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:30,800
Why'd you come home with me?
265
00:22:31,140 --> 00:22:32,140
Because you're cute.
266
00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:35,160
Well, shut up.
267
00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:38,280
Take off your shirt.
268
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:52,200
Like that? Take it off.
269
00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:56,720
Make your shoes have to go.
270
00:23:02,140 --> 00:23:03,940
These have to go.
271
00:23:26,350 --> 00:23:27,350
Hop on.
272
00:24:07,500 --> 00:24:08,500
No.
273
00:25:17,450 --> 00:25:18,450
Thank you.
274
00:26:46,060 --> 00:26:47,540
Then do I have something to show you?
275
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:50,320
Come here.
276
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:05,480
How do you like that?
277
00:27:40,450 --> 00:27:41,550
Keep hugging.
278
00:27:46,270 --> 00:27:47,590
Oh, yeah.
279
00:27:49,670 --> 00:27:50,850
Oh, I can't.
280
00:27:51,110 --> 00:27:52,110
Oh, wait.
281
00:27:52,550 --> 00:27:54,010
Okay, now.
282
00:28:13,139 --> 00:28:15,020
Best blind date ever.
283
00:28:16,520 --> 00:28:17,840
All right.
284
00:28:23,900 --> 00:28:26,880
OnlineOneNighter .com. It was amazing.
19587
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