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Men
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lurking in bushes
3
00:00:37,153 --> 00:00:40,489
in parks, public parks.
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00:00:40,489 --> 00:00:42,858
Don't they worry about
insects?
5
00:00:43,926 --> 00:00:46,095
What if a mosquito, you know,
down there?
6
00:00:47,129 --> 00:00:50,466
And those bookstores, come on,
a hole in the wall.
7
00:00:51,367 --> 00:00:53,502
They don't know who, or what's
on the other side.
8
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Like disease isn't enough.
9
00:00:55,304 --> 00:00:57,540
What about splinters?
10
00:00:57,707 --> 00:00:59,909
Not that they’d care, the
way they’re pierced,
11
00:00:59,909 --> 00:01:02,979
holes everywhere, even their
12
00:01:02,979 --> 00:01:03,913
well, yeah, exactly.
13
00:01:03,913 --> 00:01:05,881
I've never even touched myself
14
00:01:05,881 --> 00:01:08,250
some places those, you know,
have
15
00:01:09,118 --> 00:01:09,952
pierced.
16
00:01:11,253 --> 00:01:12,054
And yeah, I know, I know
17
00:01:12,054 --> 00:01:13,189
they're not all like that.
18
00:01:13,189 --> 00:01:14,991
I watched Oprah.
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00:01:15,124 --> 00:01:17,193
But, the ones that aren't,
you think they're not as bad?
20
00:01:18,094 --> 00:01:20,563
I'm open minded and all that
slop. Guy wanna wear a dress,
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00:01:21,130 --> 00:01:23,833
hey, free country.
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00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:29,171
But some of them, flowery sun
dresses, and they got beards.
23
00:01:30,106 --> 00:01:30,706
I mean,
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00:01:31,440 --> 00:01:33,943
I've seen, at one of those
parades
25
00:01:34,610 --> 00:01:38,514
on the TV. I saw the
parade on TV.
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00:01:41,317 --> 00:01:43,319
I know every guy's not
27
00:01:43,319 --> 00:01:45,488
I mean, I'm not
28
00:01:45,788 --> 00:01:49,458
I look in the mirror and
I don't see much, but
29
00:01:52,962 --> 00:01:56,032
I need off, off, off it all.
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00:01:56,799 --> 00:01:58,534
I've been losing
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00:01:58,534 --> 00:02:00,636
track of things.
32
00:02:02,471 --> 00:02:05,041
Please, tell me, what things?
33
00:02:07,376 --> 00:02:08,277
Last week,
34
00:02:08,277 --> 00:02:10,679
I kind of sort of lost count
of some pills.
35
00:02:11,514 --> 00:02:13,749
Made me think maybe it might
be time to see someone.
36
00:02:15,551 --> 00:02:16,118
You understand
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00:02:16,118 --> 00:02:17,219
I'm a psychologist,
38
00:02:17,219 --> 00:02:19,388
not a psychiatrist.
39
00:02:20,056 --> 00:02:20,756
So?
40
00:02:20,756 --> 00:02:23,092
I'd like you to see
a psychiatrist.
41
00:02:23,826 --> 00:02:25,461
I'm that far gone?
42
00:02:25,461 --> 00:02:25,895
Why not you?
43
00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:28,330
No. In addition.
A psychiatrist
44
00:02:28,330 --> 00:02:30,433
for a medication consult.
For depression.
45
00:02:32,435 --> 00:02:33,769
Me? Here?
46
00:02:33,769 --> 00:02:34,904
I'm miles from depressed.
47
00:02:36,205 --> 00:02:37,473
I heard mention of suicide.
48
00:02:37,473 --> 00:02:39,375
I flushed those pills.
They’re sewage. I swear.
49
00:02:41,377 --> 00:02:42,978
Do you still think about
suicide?
50
00:02:42,978 --> 00:02:44,780
I don't think about anything.
51
00:02:44,780 --> 00:02:45,748
Wake up, my brain,
52
00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:48,684
I might as well, you know,
give in.
53
00:02:51,787 --> 00:02:52,221
Look, I'm
54
00:02:52,221 --> 00:02:54,256
not going to kill anyone,
including myself.
55
00:02:55,624 --> 00:02:57,226
Convince me.
56
00:02:59,528 --> 00:03:01,664
Uh, that pill stuff,
57
00:03:03,699 --> 00:03:04,600
I kind of, sort of lied.
58
00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:06,936
I never took pills.
59
00:03:10,573 --> 00:03:13,642
And you'll kindly explain,
why the lie?
60
00:03:13,642 --> 00:03:15,744
What, you don't ever lie?
61
00:03:15,845 --> 00:03:16,278
Frank.
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00:03:16,278 --> 00:03:17,847
I'm the therapist,
63
00:03:17,847 --> 00:03:19,949
which allows me to answer
your questions,
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00:03:19,949 --> 00:03:20,583
with a question.
65
00:03:20,616 --> 00:03:22,451
You, on the other hand,
66
00:03:22,451 --> 00:03:24,553
cannot. Now, why the lie?
67
00:03:27,556 --> 00:03:28,090
Well,
68
00:03:28,090 --> 00:03:30,960
you asked what I wanted off
of, and I panicked.
69
00:03:32,695 --> 00:03:34,797
Then I'll ask again.
70
00:03:35,498 --> 00:03:37,533
Of what would you like off?
71
00:03:39,335 --> 00:03:40,136
You know,
72
00:03:40,136 --> 00:03:41,103
yeah?
73
00:03:41,904 --> 00:03:42,938
Correct.
74
00:03:44,273 --> 00:03:45,107
So?
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00:03:45,741 --> 00:03:47,276
I can't cure you.
76
00:03:47,276 --> 00:03:49,979
Your suffering isn't from
a disease.
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00:03:49,979 --> 00:03:51,714
I thought you did that type
of counseling.
78
00:03:53,115 --> 00:03:53,482
Frank,
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00:03:53,482 --> 00:03:55,584
would you like it to be
a disease?
80
00:03:55,584 --> 00:03:57,253
So a pill would make it
disappear?
81
00:03:57,253 --> 00:03:59,622
That pill--I'd kill for.
82
00:03:59,622 --> 00:04:01,690
The quick fix, huh?
83
00:04:01,790 --> 00:04:04,293
Change requires more than
a pill.
84
00:04:04,293 --> 00:04:05,961
The difficulty of it now,
85
00:04:05,961 --> 00:04:07,663
isn't diddly-doo compared to
86
00:04:07,663 --> 00:04:09,031
the difficulty of changing it.
87
00:04:09,031 --> 00:04:10,666
You think you're up to such
difficulty?
88
00:04:10,666 --> 00:04:12,368
Told you, I don't think.
89
00:04:12,368 --> 00:04:15,304
Working with me requires you
start.
90
00:04:16,505 --> 00:04:19,275
I do have other clients with
identity
91
00:04:19,275 --> 00:04:22,244
disorder issues experiencing
similar pain to yours.
92
00:04:22,511 --> 00:04:24,980
I understand English, usually,
so talk it. Huh?
93
00:04:27,249 --> 00:04:29,618
Many of my clients, as
we proceed
94
00:04:30,186 --> 00:04:33,022
discover their interests,
interests of which
95
00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:36,025
you wish to be freed, lessen,
and eventually disappear.
96
00:04:36,025 --> 00:04:37,526
So you do--
97
00:04:37,526 --> 00:04:39,962
I help people create lives
that work.
98
00:04:39,962 --> 00:04:41,530
If it disappears,
99
00:04:41,530 --> 00:04:43,933
then many of my clients seem
pleased by the byproduct.
100
00:04:44,233 --> 00:04:45,100
Fuck yeah.
101
00:04:47,036 --> 00:04:49,572
You desire change.
102
00:04:49,905 --> 00:04:51,607
Are you prepared for the
most grueling journey
103
00:04:51,607 --> 00:04:53,108
of your life?
104
00:04:56,245 --> 00:04:57,913
I understand English always,
105
00:04:57,913 --> 00:04:59,615
so talk it. Are you prepared
106
00:04:59,615 --> 00:05:01,116
I don’t know.
107
00:05:03,752 --> 00:05:04,687
Well, if you ever do know,
108
00:05:04,687 --> 00:05:07,723
feel free to schedule
another appointment.
109
00:05:07,723 --> 00:05:10,025
If not, of course,
I wish you the best.
110
00:07:03,372 --> 00:07:04,973
Wow.
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00:07:05,507 --> 00:07:05,908
Whatever
112
00:07:05,908 --> 00:07:07,643
vitamin you’re taking
113
00:07:07,643 --> 00:07:08,911
Vitamin L.
114
00:07:09,144 --> 00:07:11,447
L? Love? Lust?
115
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:12,815
Lecher-osity?
116
00:07:12,815 --> 00:07:15,651
Lying. What an aphrodisiac.
117
00:07:17,219 --> 00:07:18,287
Details!
118
00:07:19,088 --> 00:07:19,855
Okay.
119
00:07:20,689 --> 00:07:23,192
Our initial therapist/client
chitchat was of the
120
00:07:23,225 --> 00:07:25,861
perfectly blah blah genre,
that you as a psychologist,
121
00:07:25,861 --> 00:07:27,896
I assume, are excessively
familiar with.
122
00:07:28,030 --> 00:07:30,399
Until the good doctor says,
“pull down your pants.”
123
00:07:30,399 --> 00:07:31,967
And I say, “excuse me,
Big Daddy-O,
124
00:07:31,967 --> 00:07:33,268
you're hardly my type.”
125
00:07:33,268 --> 00:07:34,203
But in the name of solid
126
00:07:34,203 --> 00:07:36,171
investigative reporting,
I decide to drop
127
00:07:36,171 --> 00:07:37,673
my very brief, briefs.
128
00:07:37,673 --> 00:07:40,376
Then Dr. Frankenstein slaps
electrodes to my low hanging
129
00:07:40,376 --> 00:07:42,144
and extraordinarily oversized
man-balls
130
00:07:42,144 --> 00:07:45,080
And I’m thinking, oh, my God,
how did I let my dear, sweet
131
00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:47,116
son-of-a-bitch Jonathan,
talk me into this?
132
00:07:47,816 --> 00:07:49,618
He shows me a slide of this
naked toy-boy-
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00:07:49,618 --> 00:07:51,453
beauty-boy, and I'm
thinking, well,
134
00:07:51,453 --> 00:07:54,957
this isn't so bad. Until this
electric shock zaps me
135
00:07:55,257 --> 00:07:56,358
and suddenly I'm prancing
around
136
00:07:56,358 --> 00:07:58,227
like I'm auditioning for
the City Ballet.
137
00:07:58,227 --> 00:07:59,328
He flips off the switch,
138
00:07:59,328 --> 00:08:01,363
and the instant the current
stops, the hunk-a-rama
139
00:08:01,363 --> 00:08:02,831
slide is replaced with a slide
140
00:08:02,831 --> 00:08:05,300
of an, objectively,
rather uninteresting
141
00:08:05,300 --> 00:08:06,702
naked woman.
142
00:08:06,702 --> 00:08:09,371
You know, men equal pain.
Women equal relief.
143
00:08:10,572 --> 00:08:12,341
As if I needed an
electric shock
144
00:08:12,341 --> 00:08:16,278
to teach me that men
equal pain.
145
00:08:16,979 --> 00:08:17,646
No dinner
146
00:08:17,646 --> 00:08:20,716
‘till you tell me what
really happened.
147
00:08:20,716 --> 00:08:22,684
Well, I knew I was in trouble
when he put on the
148
00:08:22,684 --> 00:08:23,385
rubber gloves.
149
00:08:23,385 --> 00:08:23,952
Frank.
150
00:08:23,952 --> 00:08:25,721
Okay, okay. I'll tell you.
151
00:08:25,721 --> 00:08:28,023
For you, my love,
nothing but the truth.
152
00:08:31,693 --> 00:08:34,463
I pulled it off.
153
00:08:36,131 --> 00:08:38,133
I should have been an actor
instead of a writer.
154
00:08:38,133 --> 00:08:39,101
I was so butch.
155
00:08:39,101 --> 00:08:40,169
More perfectly butch
156
00:08:40,169 --> 00:08:41,937
than I ever dreamed I
could be.
157
00:08:41,937 --> 00:08:45,174
Sweetie, you can be butch.
158
00:08:45,174 --> 00:08:47,142
But I was petrified
that I would lose control
159
00:08:47,142 --> 00:08:48,410
and my voice would rise
an octave
160
00:08:48,410 --> 00:08:49,678
and the spirit of
Judy Garland
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00:08:49,678 --> 00:08:51,146
would burst from my body.
162
00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:52,848
When is the spirit of
Judy Garland
163
00:08:52,848 --> 00:08:54,583
ever burst from your body?
164
00:08:54,583 --> 00:08:55,984
Exactly. But what if
my first session
165
00:08:55,984 --> 00:08:57,519
with Frankenstein was
the moment
166
00:08:57,519 --> 00:08:59,555
when all my nelliness
first surfaced?
167
00:09:00,155 --> 00:09:01,824
You're being a tad offensive,
you know.
168
00:09:02,791 --> 00:09:04,960
That's the point.
169
00:09:04,960 --> 00:09:08,096
I dripped a self-loathing,
so terrifyingly
170
00:09:08,096 --> 00:09:11,333
easy to find in myself.
171
00:09:13,368 --> 00:09:15,070
I was the perfect
public service
172
00:09:15,070 --> 00:09:18,941
announcement for fag haters.
173
00:09:20,442 --> 00:09:21,143
We're gonna nail
174
00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:24,446
this guy.
175
00:09:24,446 --> 00:09:27,316
But, get this.
176
00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:29,585
Not once did he utter the word
177
00:09:29,585 --> 00:09:32,154
g-g-g-g-gay, like he'd spew
fuzzy green chunks if the
178
00:09:32,154 --> 00:09:34,423
dreaded G-word passed
his lips.
179
00:09:34,423 --> 00:09:37,493
So I figured next session--
chunks.
180
00:09:37,493 --> 00:09:38,861
But what else?
181
00:09:39,161 --> 00:09:40,429
I need coaching.
182
00:09:40,429 --> 00:09:43,765
If you were him, exactly
what would you be expecting?
183
00:09:43,765 --> 00:09:45,901
Well, if I were he,
184
00:09:47,202 --> 00:09:49,538
I'd expect lots of doubts.
185
00:09:49,538 --> 00:09:51,039
Lots of questions.
186
00:09:51,039 --> 00:09:53,675
Okay, I've got questions
Dr. Apsey.
187
00:09:53,675 --> 00:09:55,844
I got questions.
188
00:09:55,844 --> 00:09:57,846
I'd recommend asking them.
189
00:09:57,846 --> 00:09:59,515
No Bible thumping.
190
00:09:59,515 --> 00:10:01,416
I don't care what Jesus
thinks of me.
191
00:10:01,416 --> 00:10:04,186
I have no interest in Jesus'
opinion of you either.
192
00:10:04,386 --> 00:10:05,654
This is not Christian therapy.
193
00:10:06,722 --> 00:10:07,456
Anything else?
194
00:10:07,456 --> 00:10:08,957
Unorthodox techniques.
195
00:10:08,957 --> 00:10:11,126
Like torture? Okay.
196
00:10:11,126 --> 00:10:13,662
No electric shocks.
No electric shocks,
197
00:10:13,729 --> 00:10:15,464
no funny smells to make
me puke
198
00:10:15,464 --> 00:10:16,398
when you flash pictures
199
00:10:16,398 --> 00:10:18,834
of naked individuals. No
punishment stuff.
200
00:10:18,834 --> 00:10:20,903
What you're describing's
aversion therapy.
201
00:10:20,903 --> 00:10:23,071
I promise none of that.
202
00:10:23,071 --> 00:10:24,973
Only direct, honest talk.
203
00:10:24,973 --> 00:10:26,875
So direct he couldn't even
say the G-word.
204
00:10:26,875 --> 00:10:28,143
Yeah. Couldn't say the word.
205
00:10:28,143 --> 00:10:30,746
Then last week, why wouldn't
you say the word?
206
00:10:30,746 --> 00:10:32,481
And what word was that?
207
00:10:32,481 --> 00:10:33,982
The word.
208
00:10:34,182 --> 00:10:37,219
Oh, yes, the word.
209
00:10:38,387 --> 00:10:40,289
You refrained from using it.
210
00:10:40,289 --> 00:10:42,524
So I chose similar restraint
out of respect for you.
211
00:10:43,425 --> 00:10:45,494
Have you ever employed it?
To describe yourself.
212
00:10:46,728 --> 00:10:48,163
Been to a therapist before.
Said it then.
213
00:10:48,163 --> 00:10:51,133
I'd like to see copies of
the records.
214
00:10:51,133 --> 00:10:52,701
Forging records. That's
inadvisable.
215
00:10:52,701 --> 00:10:55,604
That's impossible. The
guy's died.
216
00:10:55,971 --> 00:10:58,840
Or moved. Or something.
217
00:11:03,312 --> 00:11:05,247
Did this other therapist
use aversion?
218
00:11:05,247 --> 00:11:06,748
I don't remember.
219
00:11:07,716 --> 00:11:09,851
You don't recall if he used
electric shock.
220
00:11:09,851 --> 00:11:11,987
Little electrodes over
your body?
221
00:11:13,021 --> 00:11:14,389
Oh, no. No shocks.
222
00:11:14,389 --> 00:11:15,557
Any form of aversion?
223
00:11:15,557 --> 00:11:17,593
No.
224
00:11:17,626 --> 00:11:19,795
So how are you aware of
aversion therapy?
225
00:11:20,395 --> 00:11:21,530
There are books.
226
00:11:22,497 --> 00:11:25,467
Ah, of course. I've read.
227
00:11:26,201 --> 00:11:26,735
I’ve read.
228
00:11:26,735 --> 00:11:27,269
What books?
229
00:11:27,269 --> 00:11:29,037
The Recurring Use of
Aversion Techniques
230
00:11:29,037 --> 00:11:30,272
in the Clinical Treatment
of the Male
231
00:11:30,272 --> 00:11:33,508
Homosexual in the
20th Century.
232
00:11:34,676 --> 00:11:36,478
I don't remember the title.
233
00:11:38,647 --> 00:11:40,983
You're aware of aversion
therapy, yet
234
00:11:41,583 --> 00:11:44,219
your previous therapist
never used it.
235
00:11:44,219 --> 00:11:46,922
You've read, but you don't
remember the books.
236
00:11:48,857 --> 00:11:51,059
If you were I, Frank, would
you believe that?
237
00:11:51,059 --> 00:11:51,627
A good therapist
238
00:11:51,627 --> 00:11:53,895
doesn't insinuate his client
is lying.
239
00:11:53,895 --> 00:11:55,998
I don't think a good therapist
calls his client a liar.
240
00:11:56,164 --> 00:11:57,733
Probably not.
241
00:11:58,367 --> 00:11:59,768
Are you lying?
242
00:11:59,768 --> 00:12:00,235
No.
243
00:12:01,370 --> 00:12:05,173
Uh, maybe.
244
00:12:06,375 --> 00:12:06,675
Maybe
245
00:12:06,675 --> 00:12:09,211
I never exactly been to
a therapist.
246
00:12:11,980 --> 00:12:14,750
Then my previous question
remains.
247
00:12:14,750 --> 00:12:18,020
Have you ever verbalized the
word about yourself?
248
00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,322
Could be.
249
00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:22,591
Not.
250
00:12:22,824 --> 00:12:24,793
If you did, what would
happen?
251
00:12:24,793 --> 00:12:26,194
Your worst fear.
252
00:12:27,129 --> 00:12:28,997
Oh, if I said it, I'd puke
my guts.
253
00:12:28,997 --> 00:12:30,932
A fear of vomiting, nothing
more?
254
00:12:30,932 --> 00:12:31,600
There'd be more.
255
00:12:31,600 --> 00:12:33,101
Course there's more.
256
00:12:33,101 --> 00:12:33,869
Tell me.
257
00:12:35,437 --> 00:12:37,039
Don't know I got the words.
258
00:12:37,039 --> 00:12:38,006
Find them.
259
00:12:42,811 --> 00:12:45,213
I got, you know, a life.
Not a perfect life.
260
00:12:45,213 --> 00:12:46,948
But I'm standing.
261
00:12:47,749 --> 00:12:51,787
And sometimes I think that one
word--and my tendons'd
262
00:12:51,787 --> 00:12:55,123
let go my bones, my muscles'd
turn to Jell-O
263
00:12:56,224 --> 00:12:57,959
and I'd collapse.
264
00:12:58,260 --> 00:13:00,429
I don't think I could say that
word and still stand.
265
00:13:00,429 --> 00:13:01,930
Do it anyway.
266
00:13:03,665 --> 00:13:05,801
I'm pressing, Frank because
the first step
267
00:13:05,801 --> 00:13:08,470
to change is accepting what
you want to change.
268
00:13:08,503 --> 00:13:10,205
Hey, I accept it.
269
00:13:10,205 --> 00:13:12,708
I quite doubt a human organism
can accept something
270
00:13:12,708 --> 00:13:14,142
he/she won't verbalize.
271
00:13:34,663 --> 00:13:36,264
Earlier you said you have
a life.
272
00:13:36,431 --> 00:13:37,032
Yeah.
273
00:13:37,933 --> 00:13:38,800
What type of life?
274
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:42,070
A supercallifragilistic life
with the man
275
00:13:42,070 --> 00:13:43,238
you love.
276
00:13:45,907 --> 00:13:47,042
A life, a life.
277
00:13:47,042 --> 00:13:48,410
Just a life.
278
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:50,078
You're not married, correct?
279
00:13:50,078 --> 00:13:50,746
No.
280
00:13:50,812 --> 00:13:51,947
Girlfriend?
281
00:13:52,047 --> 00:13:52,514
No.
282
00:13:52,748 --> 00:13:53,181
Boyfriend?
283
00:13:53,181 --> 00:13:54,716
Husband, please.
284
00:13:54,783 --> 00:13:55,617
Fuck you...
285
00:14:00,555 --> 00:14:02,557
No. No boyfriend.
286
00:14:02,557 --> 00:14:04,626
Would you like someone
special in your life?
287
00:14:04,626 --> 00:14:06,061
Doesn't everyone?
288
00:14:06,695 --> 00:14:08,463
So, is your life working?
289
00:14:08,463 --> 00:14:09,998
My life's not so bad.
290
00:14:09,998 --> 00:14:12,100
So why are you here?
291
00:14:12,467 --> 00:14:14,770
Okay, my life sucks.
292
00:14:14,770 --> 00:14:16,538
My life's a fucking nightmare.
293
00:14:16,538 --> 00:14:17,372
Enough?
294
00:14:17,572 --> 00:14:19,141
No. Why?
295
00:14:19,141 --> 00:14:20,442
Because.
296
00:14:20,976 --> 00:14:21,977
Because.
297
00:14:22,711 --> 00:14:24,012
Because I may have
tendencies--
298
00:14:24,012 --> 00:14:26,047
Because I have tendencies.
That may be--
299
00:14:26,047 --> 00:14:27,783
that are--
300
00:14:30,018 --> 00:14:31,653
homosexual.
301
00:14:43,131 --> 00:14:45,734
I maybe kinda sorta messed up.
302
00:14:47,302 --> 00:14:49,437
Instead of forcing him to
use the word,
303
00:14:50,005 --> 00:14:52,174
the session became about me
not saying it.
304
00:14:52,174 --> 00:14:54,476
So, you know, give him what
he wants--
305
00:14:54,476 --> 00:14:55,877
I said, "homosexual."
306
00:14:58,079 --> 00:14:59,481
"Fag" seemed too hostile,
307
00:14:59,481 --> 00:15:01,283
"gay" too neutral.
308
00:15:02,617 --> 00:15:04,319
He certainly wouldn't
understand the subtleties of
309
00:15:04,319 --> 00:15:05,821
the word "queer."
310
00:15:05,821 --> 00:15:08,790
I don't understand the
subtleties of the word queer.
311
00:15:10,692 --> 00:15:13,361
Basic homophobia 101
theories.
312
00:15:14,262 --> 00:15:16,998
He manipulated you into saying
the dreaded H-word.
313
00:15:18,133 --> 00:15:19,634
You won't be able to cope
with the truth,
314
00:15:19,634 --> 00:15:21,937
so you'll sink into
self-destructive behavior
315
00:15:22,103 --> 00:15:22,871
the way we all do
316
00:15:22,871 --> 00:15:25,907
when we're faced with our
sick, twisted selves.
317
00:15:27,008 --> 00:15:28,677
Drink yourself into oblivion.
318
00:15:28,677 --> 00:15:29,611
Have a few unsafe,
319
00:15:29,611 --> 00:15:31,847
anonymous fucks in filthy
places.
320
00:15:32,447 --> 00:15:35,350
Rape a couple of blind,
handicapped ten-year-old boys.
321
00:15:35,350 --> 00:15:37,152
You know, the usual faggot
fare.
322
00:15:37,152 --> 00:15:39,321
So, next week
323
00:15:39,321 --> 00:15:41,556
you make up some gooey
experience,
324
00:15:41,556 --> 00:15:42,657
so he can convince you
325
00:15:42,657 --> 00:15:45,093
what a twisted worm of a man
you are,
326
00:15:45,293 --> 00:15:47,362
and pull you out of the
homosexual muck
327
00:15:47,362 --> 00:15:49,631
and into a blissful
heterosexual life where the
328
00:15:49,631 --> 00:15:50,031
sun always shines.
329
00:15:50,031 --> 00:15:51,967
What do you mean, "make up?"
330
00:15:51,967 --> 00:15:53,335
You want to see the monster's
methods? You gotta
331
00:15:53,335 --> 00:15:54,369
give him what he wants.
332
00:15:55,570 --> 00:15:57,272
Talk dirty to him.
333
00:15:57,272 --> 00:15:58,707
I wouldn't do that.
334
00:15:58,707 --> 00:16:00,041
That's not my experience.
335
00:16:00,041 --> 00:16:01,309
Not me.
336
00:16:01,309 --> 00:16:04,012
The me in his office, that
me wouldn't talk dirty.
337
00:16:04,012 --> 00:16:05,947
So talk clean, but the
338
00:16:05,947 --> 00:16:09,484
extracurricular activities--
very, very dirty.
339
00:16:10,719 --> 00:16:13,555
So, if you were to, you know,
340
00:16:14,990 --> 00:16:16,191
what would it be?
341
00:16:17,659 --> 00:16:19,060
Sex in bushes?
342
00:16:19,060 --> 00:16:21,129
No, I told him I don't
like that.
343
00:16:21,596 --> 00:16:22,564
Perfect.
344
00:16:22,564 --> 00:16:23,498
He assumes you're lying
345
00:16:23,498 --> 00:16:26,801
and have a frequent bush
pass for the park.
346
00:16:28,169 --> 00:16:30,171
No, if I'd ever have anonymous
sex, I'd--
347
00:16:32,507 --> 00:16:33,642
What?
348
00:16:37,045 --> 00:16:38,113
No.
349
00:16:38,113 --> 00:16:39,281
What?
350
00:16:41,016 --> 00:16:42,317
Tell me.
351
00:16:45,353 --> 00:16:49,257
A huge club, with pitch
black rooms.
352
00:16:49,257 --> 00:16:51,126
There's lots of men, and
there's
353
00:16:51,126 --> 00:16:53,461
lots of wandering hands.
354
00:16:53,461 --> 00:16:56,932
A relentless army of hungry
hands, smothering my body.
355
00:16:57,465 --> 00:17:00,468
Pinching fingers, probing
tongues.
356
00:17:00,468 --> 00:17:02,570
So sticky. So wet.
357
00:17:03,505 --> 00:17:06,408
You seem to have given this
a lot of thought.
358
00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:07,676
Uh-huh.
359
00:17:08,643 --> 00:17:09,044
So--
360
00:17:09,044 --> 00:17:11,646
that's what you'll tell
Frankenstein next week.
361
00:17:11,646 --> 00:17:12,914
Yeah, but I've never been.
362
00:17:12,914 --> 00:17:14,516
He'll know I'm making it up.
363
00:17:17,652 --> 00:17:18,553
Okay.
364
00:17:26,361 --> 00:17:27,696
Club Phuque.
365
00:17:28,029 --> 00:17:29,431
P-H-U-Q-U-E.
366
00:17:29,965 --> 00:17:33,068
Cute. Group scenes, role
playing,
367
00:17:33,068 --> 00:17:36,037
fetish attire required. Open
seven days, ten to four.
368
00:17:36,037 --> 00:17:39,507
Refreshments, non-smoking
rooms.
369
00:17:40,742 --> 00:17:41,576
Yeah?
370
00:17:42,410 --> 00:17:44,412
You can't fabricate,
then fornicate.
371
00:17:45,213 --> 00:17:49,684
Go to a sex club. Do
whatever--safe only of course.
372
00:17:50,552 --> 00:17:52,721
Then you got a nice
non-fabricated experience
373
00:17:52,721 --> 00:17:53,321
to tell Frankenstein.
374
00:17:53,321 --> 00:17:55,223
I can't believe you want me
to have sex with another guy.
375
00:17:55,223 --> 00:17:55,991
I don't.
376
00:17:55,991 --> 00:17:57,859
I want you to write this
article.
377
00:17:57,859 --> 00:17:59,494
If we stop one guy from going
378
00:17:59,494 --> 00:18:01,029
to this quack, you've saved
a life.
379
00:18:01,029 --> 00:18:03,465
God, I hate when you do
this, Jonathan.
380
00:18:04,032 --> 00:18:06,968
If I were a Good Fag, I'd
protest with you at every new
381
00:18:06,968 --> 00:18:09,070
cause du jour. If I were a Good
Fag, I yell louder.
382
00:18:09,070 --> 00:18:12,507
If I were a Good Fag, I'd
throw condoms at the Pope.
383
00:18:17,512 --> 00:18:19,814
I can do what you want,
which makes me the Good Fag,
384
00:18:19,948 --> 00:18:23,018
or I can not do what you want,
which makes me an
385
00:18:23,018 --> 00:18:26,821
unenlightened, apolitical,
walking piece of selfish
386
00:18:26,821 --> 00:18:28,256
shit.
387
00:18:33,762 --> 00:18:34,095
It's okay
388
00:18:34,095 --> 00:18:37,032
for you to contradict that.
389
00:18:37,198 --> 00:18:38,767
What's wrong with being a
good fag?
390
00:18:38,767 --> 00:18:40,468
It's not wrong. It's just,
391
00:18:40,468 --> 00:18:43,171
it's very, very hard.
392
00:18:52,313 --> 00:18:52,781
Okay.
393
00:18:52,781 --> 00:18:53,548
Exactly what
394
00:18:53,548 --> 00:18:56,885
sordid depravities do you
want me to make up?
395
00:19:05,326 --> 00:19:05,960
My name is Franklin
396
00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:08,763
Johnston, and I am a writer.
397
00:19:08,997 --> 00:19:10,598
A freelance writer.
398
00:19:10,598 --> 00:19:12,333
Nice to meet you all.
399
00:19:12,801 --> 00:19:13,101
I didn't,
400
00:19:13,101 --> 00:19:15,470
I didn't actually make the
choice to go see Dr. Apsey.
401
00:19:15,470 --> 00:19:18,239
It was planned
402
00:19:18,807 --> 00:19:20,975
experiments.
403
00:19:23,311 --> 00:19:25,747
Went somewhere, last night,
404
00:19:25,747 --> 00:19:27,248
only to watch. I wasn't
gonna take off
405
00:19:27,248 --> 00:19:30,018
any clothes, but everything
got taken off.
406
00:19:30,018 --> 00:19:32,921
I guess there wasn't much
of a fight.
407
00:19:34,022 --> 00:19:34,823
How many times?
408
00:19:34,823 --> 00:19:37,358
How many individuals?
I don't know.
409
00:19:37,358 --> 00:19:39,694
I woke up--six a.m.
410
00:19:40,528 --> 00:19:41,463
was naked,
411
00:19:42,430 --> 00:19:43,431
curled up on a damp
412
00:19:43,431 --> 00:19:45,433
concrete floor.
413
00:19:46,534 --> 00:19:48,303
Found a pair of jeans, soaked,
414
00:19:48,303 --> 00:19:50,939
not mine. And a shirt, mine,
415
00:19:51,306 --> 00:19:53,708
but covered in--
416
00:19:54,042 --> 00:19:54,442
Yeah.
417
00:19:54,909 --> 00:19:56,411
So I left it.
418
00:19:57,011 --> 00:19:58,646
Walked home. Shirtless,
419
00:19:58,646 --> 00:20:01,883
Shoeless. Soulless.
420
00:20:03,118 --> 00:20:06,221
And you undertook this
excursion because?
421
00:20:06,488 --> 00:20:07,789
Last week you said, "say
422
00:20:07,789 --> 00:20:09,524
it, say it, say it, say
the word."
423
00:20:09,524 --> 00:20:13,027
So I said it--fagot. And I
acted like a fagot.
424
00:20:14,696 --> 00:20:16,798
All male organisms in
your situation
425
00:20:16,798 --> 00:20:19,667
don't engage in such behavior.
426
00:20:20,635 --> 00:20:22,904
You pushed me.
427
00:20:23,204 --> 00:20:24,038
Me?
428
00:20:25,073 --> 00:20:27,909
Have you ever succumb to
anonymous sex before?
429
00:20:27,909 --> 00:20:29,144
Don't remember.
430
00:20:29,878 --> 00:20:31,012
Frank.
431
00:20:31,513 --> 00:20:33,481
Your lapses of memory
consistently occur
432
00:20:33,481 --> 00:20:36,885
at ridiculously convenient
times.
433
00:20:36,885 --> 00:20:38,186
Say, "yes."
434
00:20:38,186 --> 00:20:39,521
Yeah. I guess I've done that
stuff.
435
00:20:39,521 --> 00:20:41,623
Were we acquainted during
these past exploits?
436
00:20:41,623 --> 00:20:42,190
No.
437
00:20:42,190 --> 00:20:44,259
So were these previous
encounters because of me?
438
00:20:44,459 --> 00:20:45,126
Course not.
439
00:20:45,126 --> 00:20:46,060
Then who caused you
440
00:20:46,060 --> 00:20:47,829
to have anonymous sex these
other times?
441
00:20:47,829 --> 00:20:49,264
Whoever. Your editor--
442
00:20:49,998 --> 00:20:51,432
My boss. I got fired.
443
00:20:53,434 --> 00:20:56,137
When you were fired, what
were you feeling?
444
00:20:56,137 --> 00:20:56,571
How do I know?
445
00:20:56,571 --> 00:20:57,672
I look like I keep a diary?
446
00:20:57,672 --> 00:20:59,574
Upset? Angry? Humiliated?
447
00:20:59,574 --> 00:21:00,775
All of the above.
448
00:21:00,775 --> 00:21:02,710
Last week, after you
verbalized the word
449
00:21:02,710 --> 00:21:04,212
were you all of the above?
450
00:21:04,212 --> 00:21:05,046
Yeah. Exactly.
451
00:21:05,046 --> 00:21:08,516
So both times, you were angry,
upset, humiliated,
452
00:21:08,516 --> 00:21:10,151
and what did you do?
453
00:21:12,420 --> 00:21:13,555
Fucked.
454
00:21:14,422 --> 00:21:15,790
I fucked.
455
00:21:16,090 --> 00:21:18,193
So for five fucking seconds,
I could fucking forget
456
00:21:18,193 --> 00:21:19,761
who I fucking was.
457
00:21:19,761 --> 00:21:22,630
So who caused you to have
anonymous sex?
458
00:21:22,630 --> 00:21:25,133
Don't take the blame.
459
00:21:25,233 --> 00:21:27,669
You. And my ex-boss.
460
00:21:28,303 --> 00:21:30,238
You had nothing to do with it?
461
00:21:30,238 --> 00:21:31,673
Look, slap my knuckles or
something and
462
00:21:31,673 --> 00:21:32,840
let's get on with this.
463
00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:36,277
To punish you? Last week you
specifically requested
464
00:21:36,277 --> 00:21:37,812
I refrain from punishment
techniques.
465
00:21:37,812 --> 00:21:39,614
This week you're wanting them.
Make up your mind.
466
00:21:39,614 --> 00:21:41,282
He's putting words in your
mouth.
467
00:21:41,282 --> 00:21:42,317
You're putting words in my mouth.
468
00:21:44,886 --> 00:21:47,222
I am concerned you view me
as a disciplinarian,
469
00:21:47,222 --> 00:21:48,823
and your activities the
other night
470
00:21:48,823 --> 00:21:50,191
were rebellion against me.
471
00:21:50,191 --> 00:21:52,193
Well, no real guy likes
some other
472
00:21:52,193 --> 00:21:54,529
guy telling him what to do.
473
00:21:54,529 --> 00:21:56,364
Did I ever tell you no
sex club?
474
00:21:56,364 --> 00:21:57,832
My mind's not a tape recorder.
475
00:21:57,899 --> 00:22:00,568
Mine is. I've never
mentioned sex.
476
00:22:01,536 --> 00:22:03,538
Not the word, not the
activity.
477
00:22:03,538 --> 00:22:05,807
You're rebelling against a
rule I never made.
478
00:22:06,641 --> 00:22:08,610
So why'd you assume you
shouldn't have sex?
479
00:22:08,610 --> 00:22:11,212
Well, duh. That's why
I'm here.
480
00:22:11,446 --> 00:22:13,815
Then you've created the
no-sex rule, not me.
481
00:22:14,916 --> 00:22:17,385
Perhaps you shouldn't be so
demanding of yourself.
482
00:22:17,385 --> 00:22:20,088
I should do exactly what
I'm trying not to?
483
00:22:20,788 --> 00:22:22,991
I will never tell you
whether or not to be sexual.
484
00:22:23,791 --> 00:22:26,527
But Frank, desires exist.
485
00:22:26,761 --> 00:22:29,330
Repression always fails.
Miserably.
486
00:22:29,330 --> 00:22:31,532
Healthy sex is not an
anesthetic.
487
00:22:31,933 --> 00:22:34,202
Mature adult sex connects
to feelings.
488
00:22:34,469 --> 00:22:36,704
If that's easier with a man,
practice with a man.
489
00:22:37,805 --> 00:22:39,507
I'd prefer you build an
emotionally healthy
490
00:22:39,507 --> 00:22:41,809
relationship with a man, than
have anesthetized
491
00:22:41,843 --> 00:22:44,445
sex with men, or women.
492
00:22:46,748 --> 00:22:49,317
Well, even Frankenstein has
his surprises.
493
00:22:51,753 --> 00:22:54,589
I'm, uh, I'm surprised.
494
00:22:59,193 --> 00:23:00,662
I have a confession to make.
495
00:23:00,662 --> 00:23:02,864
That story about the
sex club,
496
00:23:03,798 --> 00:23:05,300
I made it up.
497
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:06,901
Oh.
498
00:23:11,572 --> 00:23:12,707
Why this lie?
499
00:23:12,707 --> 00:23:14,442
A friend put me up to it.
500
00:23:15,410 --> 00:23:16,778
Frank, I'm gonna piss
in my pants.
501
00:23:16,778 --> 00:23:18,846
To see if you'd pee your
pants, or anything.
502
00:23:19,781 --> 00:23:20,415
Pleasantly
503
00:23:20,415 --> 00:23:22,817
it's been quite a while since
I've lost bladder control.
504
00:23:29,657 --> 00:23:30,191
Perhaps there's
505
00:23:30,191 --> 00:23:32,226
a better therapist for you.
506
00:23:34,962 --> 00:23:35,630
Great.
507
00:23:35,630 --> 00:23:36,764
Now you see what you've done?
508
00:23:36,764 --> 00:23:37,865
I'd be happy to recommend
a few.
509
00:23:37,865 --> 00:23:38,466
Okay.
510
00:23:38,466 --> 00:23:39,067
No!
511
00:23:39,267 --> 00:23:39,834
No!
512
00:23:39,834 --> 00:23:42,203
You view me as your enemy.
513
00:23:42,203 --> 00:23:43,171
Ask to stay.
514
00:23:43,171 --> 00:23:45,206
Please, let me stay.
515
00:23:45,940 --> 00:23:48,042
Have you noticed a pattern
to our sessions?
516
00:23:48,042 --> 00:23:51,012
You lie, you stumble, you
reluctantly come clean.
517
00:23:51,279 --> 00:23:52,580
He wants an apology.
518
00:23:52,580 --> 00:23:53,348
I'm sorry.
519
00:23:53,348 --> 00:23:55,483
Sorry, isn't worth doo-doo.
520
00:23:57,852 --> 00:23:59,854
Please, please, please,
521
00:23:59,854 --> 00:24:01,222
let me stay!
522
00:24:04,659 --> 00:24:07,495
The pain you radiate,
blinds me.
523
00:24:11,632 --> 00:24:12,767
I'm a sucker for pain.
524
00:24:12,767 --> 00:24:13,868
You may stay.
525
00:24:13,868 --> 00:24:14,902
If--
526
00:24:16,904 --> 00:24:18,973
you stop lying and begin
with coming clean.
527
00:24:19,540 --> 00:24:20,908
Saves time, saves energy,
528
00:24:20,908 --> 00:24:24,145
saves me pissing my pants.
529
00:24:24,512 --> 00:24:25,413
Agreed.
530
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:26,814
Thank you.
531
00:24:28,349 --> 00:24:30,218
Now, homework for the week--
532
00:24:30,218 --> 00:24:31,753
no lying.
533
00:24:32,053 --> 00:24:33,521
Lying is toxic.
534
00:24:33,521 --> 00:24:35,223
It's time to develop
healthier habits.
535
00:24:35,223 --> 00:24:37,959
And the truth, is a spiffy
habit to get into.
536
00:24:39,594 --> 00:24:40,661
He was lying,
537
00:24:40,661 --> 00:24:43,231
but his, his lies,
538
00:24:43,231 --> 00:24:45,767
by his own admission,
after a while, were very,
539
00:24:46,300 --> 00:24:48,069
were a thin veneer.
540
00:24:48,069 --> 00:24:50,938
It became very complicated.
541
00:24:51,072 --> 00:24:52,907
Well, you have all the
records, so.
542
00:24:52,907 --> 00:24:56,043
Truth is a very important
543
00:24:56,043 --> 00:24:57,345
factor in my life.
544
00:24:57,345 --> 00:24:58,479
I would like to give
545
00:24:58,479 --> 00:25:00,281
all my patients the benefit
of the doubt.
546
00:25:00,281 --> 00:25:01,649
I mean, people lie.
547
00:25:01,649 --> 00:25:03,651
I guess you could label
anything a lie,
548
00:25:03,651 --> 00:25:06,320
but people are just afraid
of the truth.
549
00:25:07,188 --> 00:25:09,157
That's, that's as clearly as
I can put it.
550
00:25:10,425 --> 00:25:11,392
I don't know.
551
00:25:11,392 --> 00:25:13,060
I don't know.
I don't know.
552
00:25:13,060 --> 00:25:15,163
I don't know why I told him
the sex club was a lie.
553
00:25:16,798 --> 00:25:17,799
Maybe it's his eyes.
554
00:25:17,799 --> 00:25:20,835
They suck words out of me
and everything backfires.
555
00:25:21,969 --> 00:25:24,071
He's supposed to tell me
I'm bad and he doesn't.
556
00:25:24,071 --> 00:25:26,407
Well, what's he gonna say?
You know,
557
00:25:26,407 --> 00:25:27,008
good afternoon,
558
00:25:27,008 --> 00:25:27,909
you're bad.
559
00:25:27,909 --> 00:25:30,578
Please pay me $150 an hour
to destroy your life.
560
00:25:31,212 --> 00:25:32,580
He's supposed to punish me,
but he won't.
561
00:25:32,580 --> 00:25:33,881
Knows that you don't
trust him.
562
00:25:33,881 --> 00:25:36,484
So he expresses compassion
to keep you off balance.
563
00:25:36,551 --> 00:25:37,819
He's supposed to hate my guts,
564
00:25:37,819 --> 00:25:39,253
but I think he actually
likes me.
565
00:25:39,253 --> 00:25:41,756
I can't deal with him
liking me.
566
00:25:41,889 --> 00:25:44,392
Because, you like him?
567
00:25:44,826 --> 00:25:46,360
You are way off.
568
00:25:46,360 --> 00:25:49,263
Clients are frequently
attracted to their therapists.
569
00:25:50,932 --> 00:25:51,732
Are you?
570
00:25:51,866 --> 00:25:53,734
You're crazy.
571
00:25:54,068 --> 00:25:55,203
I've seen him at conferences.
572
00:25:55,203 --> 00:25:56,237
He's not bad looking.
573
00:25:56,237 --> 00:25:56,437
You know,
574
00:25:56,437 --> 00:25:58,706
if he were my therapist,
I might
575
00:25:58,706 --> 00:25:59,440
sport a woody.
576
00:25:59,540 --> 00:26:01,476
You're oversharing.
577
00:26:02,810 --> 00:26:03,277
Look, I'm,
578
00:26:03,277 --> 00:26:06,247
I'm having a really bad day,
and it'd be really nice
579
00:26:06,247 --> 00:26:09,016
if you just zip up your
deliciously oversized mouth,
580
00:26:10,017 --> 00:26:12,386
nod your head, mutter a few
therapist uh-huhs, and
581
00:26:14,589 --> 00:26:16,424
never use the phrase,
582
00:26:16,424 --> 00:26:18,659
"sport a woody" again.
583
00:26:21,295 --> 00:26:23,798
Jonathan, what if I can't?
584
00:26:23,798 --> 00:26:24,866
I mean, it's not exactly like
585
00:26:24,866 --> 00:26:26,734
I've ever done a piece like
this before.
586
00:26:26,734 --> 00:26:27,869
Uh-huh.
587
00:26:27,869 --> 00:26:29,036
Was that a "therapist" uh-huh?
588
00:26:29,036 --> 00:26:32,340
I aim to please. Jonathan.
589
00:26:32,340 --> 00:26:34,008
You're a good writer.
590
00:26:34,008 --> 00:26:37,211
I'm a writer, not a reporter.
591
00:26:37,345 --> 00:26:38,079
Who am I kidding?
592
00:26:38,079 --> 00:26:39,847
I write about tulip festivals,
593
00:26:39,847 --> 00:26:43,351
and antique shows, and fall
colors. But an exposé?
594
00:26:43,518 --> 00:26:44,619
What if I'm in over my head?
595
00:26:44,619 --> 00:26:47,655
Then you will rise and meet
this challenge.
596
00:26:49,090 --> 00:26:50,224
Same way you've risen and met
597
00:26:50,224 --> 00:26:52,393
every challenge I've ever
seen you face.
598
00:26:52,393 --> 00:26:54,395
I have complete confidence
in your ability.
599
00:26:56,731 --> 00:26:57,899
You know what?
600
00:26:58,533 --> 00:26:59,033
What?
601
00:27:00,334 --> 00:27:02,703
I have an uncontrollable
desire to kiss you.
602
00:27:04,739 --> 00:27:07,808
Wow. That is friggin' freaky.
603
00:27:09,877 --> 00:27:11,045
I'm experiencing the same
604
00:27:11,045 --> 00:27:13,748
uncontrollable desire.
605
00:27:15,683 --> 00:27:16,350
Oops.
606
00:27:17,051 --> 00:27:17,919
What?
607
00:27:17,919 --> 00:27:20,555
The uncontrollable
desire is spreading.
608
00:27:20,621 --> 00:27:21,122
Oh?
609
00:27:21,122 --> 00:27:23,591
You have an uncontrollable
desire to kiss my nose?
610
00:27:23,758 --> 00:27:24,625
Yeah, that alright?
611
00:27:24,625 --> 00:27:26,060
Yeah, that's alright.
612
00:27:26,060 --> 00:27:26,727
Oops.
613
00:27:26,861 --> 00:27:28,462
Mm-hmm.
614
00:27:28,462 --> 00:27:29,430
Your earlobe. Can I kiss
it too?
615
00:27:29,497 --> 00:27:30,932
Yeah, I guess so.
616
00:27:31,098 --> 00:27:31,566
Oops.
617
00:27:31,566 --> 00:27:33,668
The bulging bag
underneath my left eye?
618
00:27:33,668 --> 00:27:34,936
How did you know?
619
00:27:34,936 --> 00:27:37,071
Faggot intuition.
620
00:27:38,773 --> 00:27:39,607
Okay,
621
00:27:40,374 --> 00:27:42,510
before you completely lose
sight of the fact
622
00:27:42,510 --> 00:27:45,279
that we are in a public place,
Jonathan,
623
00:27:47,381 --> 00:27:49,283
I respect you.
624
00:27:49,283 --> 00:27:50,518
You know, you're always
right there,
625
00:27:50,518 --> 00:27:51,786
front line.
626
00:27:51,819 --> 00:27:53,988
That's why they call me
super fag.
627
00:27:53,988 --> 00:27:55,856
Faster than a speed
dial phone tree--
628
00:27:55,856 --> 00:27:56,290
Exactly.
629
00:27:56,490 --> 00:27:58,392
Able to leaflet entire malls
in a single round--
630
00:27:58,392 --> 00:27:59,226
Exactly. But,
631
00:28:01,629 --> 00:28:02,430
it's not that I'm
632
00:28:02,430 --> 00:28:05,533
not sure if, I can pull
this off,
633
00:28:05,566 --> 00:28:07,501
but I'm not sure,
634
00:28:08,102 --> 00:28:11,505
I'm kinds thinking, feeling,
maybe
635
00:28:11,505 --> 00:28:13,608
I sorta, don't want to.
636
00:28:15,977 --> 00:28:16,577
Well.
637
00:28:19,513 --> 00:28:20,081
You don't want to,
638
00:28:20,081 --> 00:28:21,549
you don't want to. Right?
639
00:28:23,484 --> 00:28:25,519
Wants change, right?
640
00:28:26,787 --> 00:28:30,157
Wants change all the time.
641
00:28:30,424 --> 00:28:32,293
I mean, really, all the time.
642
00:28:32,293 --> 00:28:32,493
Like,
643
00:28:32,493 --> 00:28:36,597
like when you wanted to
manage our investments,
644
00:28:36,597 --> 00:28:38,032
instead of hiring a
professional.
645
00:28:38,032 --> 00:28:39,433
Except it turned out that
it was
646
00:28:39,433 --> 00:28:41,636
harder than you thought.
So you quit. And we
647
00:28:41,636 --> 00:28:44,005
ended up with a one-percent
return instead of ten or more.
648
00:28:44,005 --> 00:28:45,439
Or when you wanted to make
extra money
649
00:28:45,439 --> 00:28:47,942
with that multi-level
marketing craziness.
650
00:28:48,376 --> 00:28:50,444
Except it was more time
consuming than you thought.
651
00:28:50,444 --> 00:28:51,245
So you quit.
652
00:28:51,245 --> 00:28:53,080
And we ended up with a 100
gallons of mud-mask,
653
00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,683
and a tax write off, or
654
00:28:56,951 --> 00:28:59,286
whatever. You know, you go
halfway,
655
00:28:59,387 --> 00:29:02,590
wants change and you bail.
656
00:29:02,590 --> 00:29:04,659
And I step aside and let you
self-sabotage
657
00:29:04,659 --> 00:29:07,361
because it's your life,
and it's usually only money.
658
00:29:07,361 --> 00:29:10,131
But this time--it's more.
659
00:29:10,131 --> 00:29:12,199
So grow a backbone,
660
00:29:12,199 --> 00:29:14,969
visualize manhood,
pretend you have a brain,
661
00:29:14,969 --> 00:29:17,204
but under no circumstances--
drop out.
662
00:29:17,271 --> 00:29:19,306
Why don't you tell me what
you really think?
663
00:29:19,306 --> 00:29:22,243
Sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
664
00:29:22,243 --> 00:29:24,679
I'm not allowed needs? I'm not
allowed concerns?
665
00:29:24,712 --> 00:29:26,180
Of course you are. Tell me
your concerns.
666
00:29:26,180 --> 00:29:28,883
Oh, eat it! If I go back,
I do.
667
00:29:28,883 --> 00:29:29,950
And if I don't, I don't.
668
00:29:29,950 --> 00:29:31,786
Oh, you're going back.
669
00:29:33,587 --> 00:29:36,123
You are going back!
670
00:29:39,260 --> 00:29:41,495
The actual idea of
671
00:29:41,495 --> 00:29:45,666
Mr. Johnson posing as a
client of Dr. Apsey's
672
00:29:46,967 --> 00:29:49,704
I was not involved in.
673
00:29:50,471 --> 00:29:52,373
It was Dr. Baldwin's
674
00:29:52,373 --> 00:29:56,143
idea for me to to go
undercover.
675
00:29:56,310 --> 00:29:57,578
Prior to the events in
question,
676
00:29:57,578 --> 00:30:00,581
no, I wasn't even aware of
Dr. Baldwin.
677
00:30:00,715 --> 00:30:01,282
As Mr. Johnston
678
00:30:01,282 --> 00:30:03,451
is a reporter,
679
00:30:03,751 --> 00:30:07,354
it was not my place to decide
whether or not
680
00:30:07,521 --> 00:30:10,658
it was within the bounds of
his professional ethics.
681
00:30:14,061 --> 00:30:14,595
It's not my
682
00:30:14,595 --> 00:30:17,131
responsibility to make that
decision.
683
00:30:18,733 --> 00:30:19,867
How was your lie-free week?
684
00:30:19,867 --> 00:30:21,836
Difficult.
685
00:30:23,070 --> 00:30:23,938
Perhaps you'll share how
686
00:30:23,938 --> 00:30:25,139
difficult.
687
00:30:27,808 --> 00:30:30,377
Listen, I can't do this,
688
00:30:32,113 --> 00:30:32,713
today.
689
00:30:32,713 --> 00:30:34,181
I'll pay you.
690
00:30:34,482 --> 00:30:36,517
And therapy may be a
beneficial place
691
00:30:36,517 --> 00:30:38,953
to share these difficulties?
692
00:30:38,953 --> 00:30:42,289
I can't talk about not lying,
'cause I'd have to lie
693
00:30:42,289 --> 00:30:43,724
to do it.
694
00:30:43,824 --> 00:30:46,093
You're more comfortable with
falsehood than truth.
695
00:30:46,861 --> 00:30:50,231
But changing patterns is why
you're here.
696
00:30:50,231 --> 00:30:51,599
You don't have to have sex
with men.
697
00:30:51,599 --> 00:30:52,900
That's the big step.
698
00:30:52,900 --> 00:30:55,536
Take a small step today.
699
00:30:56,504 --> 00:31:00,141
Earn a couple bonus therapy
points.
700
00:31:00,141 --> 00:31:01,408
Tell the truth.
701
00:31:04,512 --> 00:31:07,281
The friend I told you about
last week,
702
00:31:07,281 --> 00:31:09,550
the one who convinced me to
lie about the sex club--
703
00:31:11,952 --> 00:31:14,021
He's not a friend.
704
00:31:14,288 --> 00:31:17,258
Well, no, of course he's
a friend.
705
00:31:17,258 --> 00:31:17,858
But a friend,
706
00:31:17,858 --> 00:31:20,227
I kinda sorta have a
thing with.
707
00:31:21,362 --> 00:31:21,962
I assumed.
708
00:31:22,963 --> 00:31:26,267
Now this man, what should
I call him?
709
00:31:26,267 --> 00:31:28,803
His name is Jonathan.
710
00:31:28,903 --> 00:31:31,038
And how's not lying connected
to Jonathan?
711
00:31:33,908 --> 00:31:35,342
Sometimes he wants me to
do things,
712
00:31:35,776 --> 00:31:37,678
I'm not sure I want to do.
713
00:31:37,678 --> 00:31:39,613
Sexual things?
714
00:31:40,181 --> 00:31:43,417
Personal things.
715
00:31:43,417 --> 00:31:45,553
True friends don't push.
716
00:31:45,553 --> 00:31:47,221
Yeah, and he's a therapist,
too.
717
00:31:47,221 --> 00:31:49,924
I mean, he should know better,
right?
718
00:31:53,727 --> 00:31:55,396
A therapist?
719
00:31:57,031 --> 00:31:57,865
Exactly,
720
00:31:57,865 --> 00:32:00,701
what's he been pushing you
to do?
721
00:32:06,073 --> 00:32:06,807
I know,
722
00:32:06,807 --> 00:32:10,177
you know, I've lied to you.
723
00:32:10,177 --> 00:32:11,412
It's not only to you.
724
00:32:11,412 --> 00:32:12,613
Everywhere.
725
00:32:13,747 --> 00:32:15,382
Every crack in my life,
726
00:32:15,382 --> 00:32:17,952
I putty with a lie, out of
habit to survive.
727
00:32:18,419 --> 00:32:20,688
Because day in and day out,
728
00:32:20,688 --> 00:32:22,022
I got the not so subliminal
729
00:32:22,022 --> 00:32:24,992
message that I was sick, or
defective, or pathetic
730
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:27,895
because I couldn't hammer
in a nail
731
00:32:27,895 --> 00:32:29,029
with a single pound,
732
00:32:29,029 --> 00:32:30,431
or my handshake wasn't
firm enough,
733
00:32:30,431 --> 00:32:30,831
or I couldn't
734
00:32:30,831 --> 00:32:33,133
do the forty-two pushups that
the Presidential
735
00:32:33,133 --> 00:32:34,869
Fitness Test said I should be
able to do.
736
00:32:34,869 --> 00:32:36,103
And I knew that something was
737
00:32:36,103 --> 00:32:39,173
very, very, very wrong with
me, because whenever
738
00:32:39,173 --> 00:32:41,075
there was a new neighbor, or
postman,
739
00:32:41,075 --> 00:32:43,477
or waiter who had that
certain je n'est sais quoi,
740
00:32:44,411 --> 00:32:46,347
you know, that certain
je--don't wanna--
741
00:32:46,347 --> 00:32:47,047
sais quoi,
742
00:32:47,815 --> 00:32:50,718
my dad would say, "that man's
a little light on his feet."
743
00:32:50,784 --> 00:32:52,353
And it scared me, because
somehow,
744
00:32:52,353 --> 00:32:55,322
I knew that je n'est sais
quoi--was moi.
745
00:32:55,756 --> 00:32:56,690
So. Not a day passed
746
00:32:56,690 --> 00:32:58,025
where my dad wasn't
embarrassed by me,
747
00:32:58,025 --> 00:32:58,792
and he didn't know why,
748
00:32:58,792 --> 00:33:00,461
except in the tiniest corner
of his brain
749
00:33:00,461 --> 00:33:02,997
that spoke with a voice
so soft he never listened.
750
00:33:02,997 --> 00:33:04,565
And I would do something
wrong,
751
00:33:04,565 --> 00:33:05,566
and Dad would
752
00:33:05,566 --> 00:33:09,003
hit me, on the face.
753
00:33:10,070 --> 00:33:12,273
Not a slap, but a fingers-curled-
754
00:33:12,373 --> 00:33:15,743
into-fist hit, on the face.
And Mom would try to
755
00:33:15,743 --> 00:33:17,144
stop him."Stop, stop, stop,"
756
00:33:17,144 --> 00:33:18,012
she'd yell.
757
00:33:18,012 --> 00:33:21,749
But words didn't work, so
she'd hit me first.
758
00:33:22,116 --> 00:33:25,519
You know, a softer, kinder,
gentler smack.
759
00:33:25,753 --> 00:33:27,421
She figured if she hit me
first, then he wouldn't.
760
00:33:27,421 --> 00:33:28,589
But the problem was
761
00:33:28,589 --> 00:33:30,190
she grew to like hitting me
762
00:33:30,190 --> 00:33:32,192
because power over me, was
the only power she had.
763
00:33:32,192 --> 00:33:34,962
And they'd fight. "It's
my turn!" "No, it's my turn!"
764
00:33:34,962 --> 00:33:36,830
"No, honey, you hit him
yesterday."
765
00:33:36,830 --> 00:33:37,698
"No dear,
766
00:33:37,698 --> 00:33:38,933
I don't think I would have
ever given
767
00:33:38,933 --> 00:33:41,168
him that black an eye!"
768
00:33:41,168 --> 00:33:44,438
And because I caused this
fight, they'd both
769
00:33:44,438 --> 00:33:46,340
just gang up on me. And
'cause kicking
770
00:33:46,340 --> 00:33:48,442
the shit out of me, glued
their marriage together--
771
00:33:52,846 --> 00:33:53,647
Stop it.
772
00:33:54,648 --> 00:33:55,282
Stop it.
773
00:33:56,450 --> 00:33:57,451
Frank, stop.
774
00:33:57,451 --> 00:34:00,321
Stop, stop, stop, stop.
775
00:34:06,193 --> 00:34:08,262
I'm sorry.
776
00:34:11,899 --> 00:34:13,968
I'm sorry.
777
00:34:19,540 --> 00:34:21,809
I'm so sorry.
778
00:34:29,350 --> 00:34:30,551
Okay.
779
00:34:32,519 --> 00:34:36,190
This is the truthful truth--
780
00:34:39,693 --> 00:34:40,995
Mom and Dad
781
00:34:41,195 --> 00:34:44,264
never hit me, physically, but
782
00:34:45,099 --> 00:34:48,002
they hit me with words.
783
00:34:48,135 --> 00:34:50,904
They hit me with criticism.
784
00:34:52,773 --> 00:34:54,675
They hit me with the
785
00:34:56,910 --> 00:34:58,112
disappointment
786
00:34:58,112 --> 00:35:01,882
festering in their fearful
eyes.
787
00:35:03,851 --> 00:35:04,885
And I thought I must be
788
00:35:04,885 --> 00:35:07,554
very, very, very bad
789
00:35:07,921 --> 00:35:10,624
to make them judge me.
790
00:35:11,992 --> 00:35:13,527
I figured if I lied,
791
00:35:13,527 --> 00:35:15,696
they wouldn't see me,
792
00:35:16,797 --> 00:35:18,999
and they couldn't reject me.
793
00:35:24,405 --> 00:35:26,640
And it continues even today,
no matter how much money
794
00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:30,577
I make, or how many articles
I publish. I'm a,
795
00:35:30,577 --> 00:35:32,846
I'm a writer. Did I tell you
I was a writer?
796
00:35:37,684 --> 00:35:40,788
I feel inadequate.
797
00:35:42,823 --> 00:35:45,025
And when Jonathan
798
00:35:45,025 --> 00:35:47,161
suggested writing an exposé,
799
00:35:47,161 --> 00:35:49,129
I thought, wow,
800
00:35:50,898 --> 00:35:52,699
that's a serious piece of
journalism--
801
00:35:52,699 --> 00:35:53,534
it could fix me.
802
00:35:54,701 --> 00:35:55,169
And I said,
803
00:35:55,169 --> 00:35:57,838
yes, yes, yes, save me
from myself.
804
00:35:58,972 --> 00:36:01,642
So I came to be saved,
but not by you.
805
00:36:03,477 --> 00:36:05,345
By this article.
806
00:36:12,886 --> 00:36:15,823
But then you, surprised me.
807
00:36:19,426 --> 00:36:21,962
You helped me,
808
00:36:22,463 --> 00:36:25,032
taste clean.
809
00:36:33,607 --> 00:36:35,909
Hey, I still get those bonus
points?
810
00:36:45,185 --> 00:36:46,787
Say something.
811
00:36:51,225 --> 00:36:54,461
Hate me. Hit me.
812
00:36:54,461 --> 00:36:57,164
Rip me a second asshole,
813
00:36:57,264 --> 00:36:58,132
and scream,
814
00:36:58,132 --> 00:37:01,568
"Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck
you!"
815
00:37:04,972 --> 00:37:05,472
These options
816
00:37:05,472 --> 00:37:07,608
you've suggested, many have
crossed my mind.
817
00:37:10,177 --> 00:37:11,011
But life ultimately
818
00:37:11,011 --> 00:37:14,114
is about self-control,
isn't it?
819
00:37:15,115 --> 00:37:17,284
So before I lose my
professional tolerance
820
00:37:17,284 --> 00:37:21,221
and those options seem viable,
you'd better go.
821
00:37:36,136 --> 00:37:38,071
Notice my tone.
822
00:37:38,272 --> 00:37:40,841
The low timber and even
modulation indicate
823
00:37:40,841 --> 00:37:44,011
I'm not posing a question,
or an invitation. An order.
824
00:37:45,145 --> 00:37:46,947
Now go.
825
00:37:50,684 --> 00:37:53,187
Are you expecting ugliness?
826
00:37:53,187 --> 00:37:54,922
To see my anger?
827
00:37:55,155 --> 00:37:56,623
I'm afraid I'll have to
disappoint you.
828
00:38:00,661 --> 00:38:01,428
I just,
829
00:38:02,429 --> 00:38:04,865
I just want to interview you.
830
00:38:04,865 --> 00:38:07,000
Include your side.
831
00:38:10,170 --> 00:38:11,438
Continue.
832
00:38:12,739 --> 00:38:13,974
I'm going to write this
article, with
833
00:38:13,974 --> 00:38:15,342
or without your cooperation.
834
00:38:15,342 --> 00:38:16,376
I'd prefer it to be with.
835
00:38:17,744 --> 00:38:18,545
Why?
836
00:38:20,380 --> 00:38:22,282
Professionalism.
837
00:38:22,349 --> 00:38:25,452
Professionalism hasn't been a
major force in your behavior.
838
00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:28,522
No, I guess not. But I was,
839
00:38:28,522 --> 00:38:31,158
I was talked into some things
I wish I hadn't been.
840
00:38:31,658 --> 00:38:33,827
How many times have you lied
since we've met?
841
00:38:35,762 --> 00:38:37,097
That question was not
rhetorical.
842
00:38:37,097 --> 00:38:38,966
An exact number, please.
843
00:38:39,666 --> 00:38:40,567
I don't know.
844
00:38:40,567 --> 00:38:42,069
Then estimate.
845
00:38:46,039 --> 00:38:48,208
Ah, six times.
846
00:38:48,208 --> 00:38:48,642
A conservative estimate,
alright,
847
00:38:48,642 --> 00:38:52,179
six. And not white lies, but
six malevolent falsehoods.
848
00:38:53,380 --> 00:38:54,181
I didn't have to tell you
849
00:38:54,181 --> 00:38:55,382
I was a writer.
850
00:38:55,382 --> 00:38:55,816
I could have,
851
00:38:55,816 --> 00:38:57,217
I could have continued
this game
852
00:38:57,217 --> 00:38:58,452
if all I wanted was to
trap you.
853
00:38:58,452 --> 00:39:00,420
I don't.
854
00:39:00,420 --> 00:39:02,089
I suppose so.
855
00:39:02,189 --> 00:39:03,724
You not the first client
who's lied to me.
856
00:39:03,724 --> 00:39:05,058
Well, when they lie
about their names,
857
00:39:05,058 --> 00:39:06,260
you know it's hopeless.
858
00:39:06,260 --> 00:39:08,061
Let me see your driver's
license.
859
00:39:08,061 --> 00:39:09,963
I promise I won't laugh at
your photo.
860
00:39:28,815 --> 00:39:30,851
Hmm. Franklin Johnston.
861
00:39:30,851 --> 00:39:31,785
Well,
862
00:39:32,552 --> 00:39:34,521
Mr. Johnston,
863
00:39:35,489 --> 00:39:38,859
you want to interview
me for my side?
864
00:39:39,426 --> 00:39:41,528
It's a delicate dilemma.
865
00:39:43,297 --> 00:39:43,930
To consent to
866
00:39:43,930 --> 00:39:45,732
an interview with a client
would
867
00:39:45,732 --> 00:39:49,069
clearly be an inappropriate,
dualistic relationship.
868
00:39:49,436 --> 00:39:51,872
Yet, in reality, you never
were a client. So,
869
00:39:55,008 --> 00:39:56,143
perhaps I'll give your
proposal
870
00:39:56,143 --> 00:39:59,179
serious consideration. Now go.
871
00:39:59,179 --> 00:39:59,579
I know
872
00:39:59,579 --> 00:40:02,816
"sorry" isn't worth doo-doo.
873
00:40:02,816 --> 00:40:05,952
But, please, accept my
apology.
874
00:40:05,952 --> 00:40:07,354
I'm a therapist, not a saint.
875
00:40:07,354 --> 00:40:08,355
Now go.
876
00:40:13,660 --> 00:40:15,796
Hi. Sorry I'm late. Subway's
a mess.
877
00:40:15,796 --> 00:40:17,164
Hey, champagne!
878
00:40:17,164 --> 00:40:17,931
What's the occasion?
879
00:40:17,931 --> 00:40:20,934
Listen, I'm sorry.
880
00:40:20,934 --> 00:40:22,803
Meetings, protests,
fundraisers--
881
00:40:22,803 --> 00:40:25,038
I love that life.
882
00:40:25,038 --> 00:40:27,207
You go along with me,
sometimes I think,
883
00:40:27,207 --> 00:40:29,276
just to earn Good Fag points.
884
00:40:29,776 --> 00:40:31,211
Like I dole them out.
885
00:40:31,778 --> 00:40:32,646
I promise,
886
00:40:32,646 --> 00:40:35,382
never again will I pressure
you to be more political.
887
00:40:36,416 --> 00:40:38,352
You're free. Poof.
888
00:40:38,685 --> 00:40:40,153
You don't want to write this
article, it's okay.
889
00:40:41,221 --> 00:40:42,522
I'll find someone else.
890
00:40:42,522 --> 00:40:43,156
Thanks.
891
00:40:44,558 --> 00:40:45,559
Thank you.
892
00:40:57,104 --> 00:40:58,405
Jonathan, it’s just the
893
00:40:58,405 --> 00:41:00,073
pretending I'm
uncomfortable with.
894
00:41:05,412 --> 00:41:07,547
I think I want to be
above-board.
895
00:41:08,548 --> 00:41:09,282
You know, tell him
896
00:41:09,282 --> 00:41:11,451
I'm a writer, and do a
straightforward interview.
897
00:41:12,953 --> 00:41:15,155
Like he would go along.
898
00:41:15,155 --> 00:41:17,858
And even if, trusting what
he says?
899
00:41:18,925 --> 00:41:20,060
The only way to get the
truth--
900
00:41:20,060 --> 00:41:21,795
Is by lying.
901
00:41:22,462 --> 00:41:24,131
Get the fat-free.
902
00:41:24,765 --> 00:41:26,400
If he knows you're a reporter,
he's never going
903
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:28,568
to give you honest
information.
904
00:41:28,902 --> 00:41:31,571
Well, I hope you're wrong,
because--
905
00:41:32,739 --> 00:41:33,507
Frank.
906
00:41:33,874 --> 00:41:36,376
Okay, Jonathan, just don't
flip--
907
00:41:36,376 --> 00:41:37,878
Frank. Tell me you didn't.
908
00:41:38,412 --> 00:41:39,913
I kinda sorta did.
909
00:41:39,913 --> 00:41:41,181
Frank!
910
00:41:41,481 --> 00:41:42,516
Frank!
911
00:41:44,151 --> 00:41:46,086
What on earth were you
thinking?
912
00:41:46,086 --> 00:41:47,254
I don't know. I just,
913
00:41:47,254 --> 00:41:48,255
I can't go through with this.
914
00:41:48,255 --> 00:41:49,523
After all our planning--
915
00:41:49,523 --> 00:41:50,424
Your planning--
916
00:41:50,424 --> 00:41:50,924
You sabotage--
917
00:41:50,924 --> 00:41:51,792
Choosing not to do something
918
00:41:51,792 --> 00:41:54,027
your way isn't the same
as sabotage.
919
00:41:54,027 --> 00:41:55,862
Whatever. Fine.
920
00:41:58,465 --> 00:41:59,599
It's over.
921
00:42:00,634 --> 00:42:02,569
There'll never be an article
now.
922
00:42:02,569 --> 00:42:04,971
Oh, grow up.
923
00:42:05,305 --> 00:42:06,473
How about a little honesty
here?
924
00:42:06,473 --> 00:42:07,841
Hey, just say it--
925
00:42:07,841 --> 00:42:09,910
you don't think I'm good
enough.
926
00:42:12,979 --> 00:42:14,281
Asking you to go
927
00:42:14,281 --> 00:42:16,416
undercover, was a mistake.
928
00:42:17,984 --> 00:42:20,654
If, if I always go halfway,
it's because you, you,
929
00:42:20,687 --> 00:42:22,422
you build me up--you can do
it, you can do it.
930
00:42:22,422 --> 00:42:23,924
Then you chop me down
with your doubts.
931
00:42:23,924 --> 00:42:25,091
Okay. No more halfway.
932
00:42:25,091 --> 00:42:27,761
When this article comes out,
I'll be saying, I told you so,
933
00:42:27,761 --> 00:42:28,328
I told you so,
934
00:42:28,328 --> 00:42:29,463
I told you so,
935
00:42:29,463 --> 00:42:32,132
until you're investing in
earplugs stocks.
936
00:42:32,132 --> 00:42:33,166
I very much look forward to
937
00:42:33,166 --> 00:42:35,101
you proving me wrong.
938
00:42:36,903 --> 00:42:37,971
I believe that Dr. Apsey's
939
00:42:37,971 --> 00:42:41,141
approach and the basis of
his psychotherapy
940
00:42:41,541 --> 00:42:44,811
is unethical, inappropriate,
immoral,
941
00:42:45,745 --> 00:42:49,015
as well as perhaps
malpractice.
942
00:42:49,182 --> 00:42:52,786
His use of language
is very powerful.
943
00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:56,656
He, he comes across
as sounding quite logical.
944
00:42:56,690 --> 00:43:00,527
I did not realize that
945
00:43:00,527 --> 00:43:02,762
Dr. Apsey would manipulate
946
00:43:02,762 --> 00:43:05,232
Mr. Johnston to such a degree.
947
00:43:05,699 --> 00:43:06,166
Of course,
948
00:43:06,166 --> 00:43:07,501
he was in a dilemma because
he was talking
949
00:43:07,501 --> 00:43:11,538
about someone he loved, he
cared for, but who I feel
950
00:43:11,538 --> 00:43:13,940
was using him unfairly.
951
00:43:15,809 --> 00:43:17,577
To left, or
952
00:43:18,612 --> 00:43:21,781
not to let, one never-truly-
was-a-client, i.e.,
953
00:43:21,781 --> 00:43:25,585
you, interview me for a
potentially career
954
00:43:25,585 --> 00:43:27,521
threatening article.
955
00:43:27,521 --> 00:43:30,490
The roughly four-inch-by-
four-inch area beneath
956
00:43:30,490 --> 00:43:34,227
my solar plexus currently
is experiencing a
957
00:43:34,327 --> 00:43:38,965
not negligible inflammation
commonly labeled, caution.
958
00:43:40,233 --> 00:43:41,635
My caution encourages me
959
00:43:41,635 --> 00:43:43,870
to say N.O.
960
00:43:46,239 --> 00:43:48,275
The four-point-one-pounds
above my neck--the
961
00:43:48,275 --> 00:43:50,944
average male brain is actually
three-point-one pounds--
962
00:43:50,944 --> 00:43:53,446
I hope you'll excuse me for
being a smidgen over-generous
963
00:43:53,446 --> 00:43:55,715
I'm feeling rather vulnerable.
964
00:43:55,715 --> 00:43:59,920
My brain assures me I have
nothing to lose by cooperating
965
00:44:01,121 --> 00:44:03,223
You'll write the article with
or without my input.
966
00:44:03,223 --> 00:44:05,725
If you lie, you lie.
967
00:44:05,725 --> 00:44:08,628
If you tell the truth, I can
only gain from an interview.
968
00:44:09,029 --> 00:44:11,464
The single path to victory
is to step aside.
969
00:44:11,765 --> 00:44:13,066
As the history of humanity
970
00:44:13,066 --> 00:44:14,801
and inhumanity clearly
demonstrates,
971
00:44:14,801 --> 00:44:17,470
stepping aside is, of course,
972
00:44:17,470 --> 00:44:20,206
much more difficult than
loading a gun and shooting it.
973
00:44:20,206 --> 00:44:24,044
How to step aside,
make the correct decision?
974
00:44:24,911 --> 00:44:28,081
I have no earthly idea.
975
00:44:37,057 --> 00:44:39,192
And you're telling me this
because?
976
00:44:39,192 --> 00:44:41,328
Ah, my analogy eludes you.
977
00:44:41,328 --> 00:44:43,463
Then I'll try again in a more
simple vernacular.
978
00:44:44,097 --> 00:44:46,499
Ya like Oprah?
979
00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:47,667
Sure. Who doesn't?
980
00:44:47,667 --> 00:44:49,736
I wouldn't know. Her people
phoned me.
981
00:44:49,736 --> 00:44:52,806
I declined. Talk shows
expect you to be combative.
982
00:44:52,806 --> 00:44:54,107
I'm not.
983
00:44:54,107 --> 00:44:55,742
They expect you to be
defensive.
984
00:44:55,742 --> 00:44:56,309
I'm not.
985
00:44:56,309 --> 00:44:58,945
They expect you to be charming
and have a sublime ability
986
00:44:58,945 --> 00:44:59,613
to banter.
987
00:45:01,214 --> 00:45:02,048
Well.
988
00:45:02,549 --> 00:45:03,516
Ha, okay.
989
00:45:03,950 --> 00:45:07,120
But honesty and integrity
aren't assets
990
00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:08,421
during a ratings sweep.
991
00:45:08,421 --> 00:45:11,858
Do you find my condescension
of television arrogant?
992
00:45:11,858 --> 00:45:14,694
Extremely, but not
unjustified.
993
00:45:14,694 --> 00:45:16,229
I'm pleased we see eye to eye.
994
00:45:16,229 --> 00:45:18,331
Now you must elucidate--
995
00:45:18,331 --> 00:45:22,402
why would a wise organism
trust the print media more
996
00:45:22,402 --> 00:45:24,871
than the electronic media?
997
00:45:27,941 --> 00:45:30,243
So, why did you ask me here
today?
998
00:45:30,243 --> 00:45:32,979
You've initiated a game
I'm powerless to terminate.
999
00:45:32,979 --> 00:45:34,481
So I intend to win.
1000
00:45:34,481 --> 00:45:36,816
You and I are not in
opposition.
1001
00:45:36,816 --> 00:45:37,584
No?
1002
00:45:37,917 --> 00:45:39,486
If I refuse your
interview, what will your
1003
00:45:39,486 --> 00:45:40,553
article say?
1004
00:45:42,088 --> 00:45:44,157
I'd say you're a,
1005
00:45:45,492 --> 00:45:47,727
you're a kind-hearted man
who's misguided
1006
00:45:47,727 --> 00:45:49,796
in his attempts to change us.
1007
00:45:49,796 --> 00:45:52,032
Oh, as I suspected. You'd
invalidate me and my work,
1008
00:45:52,032 --> 00:45:54,134
yet we're not in opposition.
1009
00:45:54,134 --> 00:45:57,437
Then you are naive, which
benefits me tremendously.
1010
00:45:57,437 --> 00:45:58,605
I will win much more easily.
1011
00:45:59,739 --> 00:46:01,374
Now. You've unfairly labeled
me as misguided.
1012
00:46:01,374 --> 00:46:03,009
How can I prove otherwise?
1013
00:46:03,009 --> 00:46:04,611
Prove your therapy works.
1014
00:46:04,611 --> 00:46:06,079
Prove it doesn't.
1015
00:46:06,079 --> 00:46:06,880
That is not my--
1016
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:08,314
And why not?
1017
00:46:08,314 --> 00:46:10,450
Your Dr. Baldwin and his
fancy office claims
1018
00:46:10,450 --> 00:46:11,284
I'm a fraud.
1019
00:46:11,284 --> 00:46:13,319
Do you ask him for proof?
1020
00:46:13,319 --> 00:46:14,688
No. Because he--
1021
00:46:14,688 --> 00:46:15,188
what?
1022
00:46:15,188 --> 00:46:17,323
He cooks your dinner,
warms your bed,
1023
00:46:17,323 --> 00:46:18,858
so his assertions go
unchallenged.
1024
00:46:18,858 --> 00:46:20,560
You know his last name. How?
1025
00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:23,096
Oh, I've done a dollop of
research this past week.
1026
00:46:23,630 --> 00:46:26,733
Your community is small
and quite talkative.
1027
00:46:26,733 --> 00:46:27,600
Information equals strength.
1028
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:30,670
I intend to play your game
from a position of strength.
1029
00:46:30,670 --> 00:46:31,204
And you've
1030
00:46:31,204 --> 00:46:33,873
certainly gone out of your way
to let me know this.
1031
00:46:35,675 --> 00:46:38,111
I wonder--does a man secure
in his strength
1032
00:46:38,111 --> 00:46:40,580
go out of his way to reveal
how strong he is?
1033
00:46:43,983 --> 00:46:44,784
I like you,
1034
00:46:44,784 --> 00:46:45,852
Mr. Johnston.
1035
00:46:48,555 --> 00:46:50,123
Next question.
1036
00:46:54,794 --> 00:46:55,328
Okay.
1037
00:46:55,328 --> 00:46:58,031
Why this type of work?
1038
00:46:58,031 --> 00:47:00,467
If I weren't so terribly shy,
I'd put it in a brochure.
1039
00:47:00,467 --> 00:47:03,503
People ask so frequently.
1040
00:47:09,476 --> 00:47:12,812
My younger brother was
similar to you,
1041
00:47:12,812 --> 00:47:13,747
my clients.
1042
00:47:15,448 --> 00:47:16,716
I thought,
1043
00:47:16,716 --> 00:47:19,085
I don't care, who cares?
1044
00:47:20,320 --> 00:47:21,821
Turned out, he cared.
1045
00:47:23,289 --> 00:47:25,158
I was nineteen.
1046
00:47:25,158 --> 00:47:26,793
I was away at college.
1047
00:47:29,662 --> 00:47:30,296
One day,
1048
00:47:30,296 --> 00:47:32,298
I received a letter from him.
1049
00:47:33,967 --> 00:47:37,337
Using the corner of a razor
blade as a pen, and his blood
1050
00:47:37,337 --> 00:47:38,171
as ink,
1051
00:47:39,606 --> 00:47:41,641
he wrote, "I won't live this
way.
1052
00:47:42,642 --> 00:47:43,777
I'm sorry."
1053
00:47:47,580 --> 00:47:48,848
When my clients frustrate me,
1054
00:47:48,848 --> 00:47:50,483
I think of my brother.
1055
00:47:54,521 --> 00:47:55,655
Okay.
1056
00:47:58,291 --> 00:48:00,660
And, how do I know
1057
00:48:00,660 --> 00:48:01,694
this really happened?
1058
00:48:04,030 --> 00:48:05,665
Here, I'll show you the
blood-drenched letter
1059
00:48:05,665 --> 00:48:06,399
I carry in my wallet.
1060
00:48:06,399 --> 00:48:07,066
I'm sorry,
1061
00:48:07,066 --> 00:48:09,803
"gay teen kills self." It's
very tragic.
1062
00:48:11,237 --> 00:48:13,039
It's also very convenient--
1063
00:48:13,039 --> 00:48:15,942
a dead brother motivating
you to save
1064
00:48:15,942 --> 00:48:18,778
the poor gay men from
killing themselves.
1065
00:48:21,347 --> 00:48:23,216
I am so thoroughly pleased
you were never a client,
1066
00:48:23,216 --> 00:48:25,285
because now I have complete
freedom to say--
1067
00:48:26,319 --> 00:48:28,254
Fuck you!
1068
00:48:28,421 --> 00:48:31,024
Fuck you! Fuck you!
1069
00:48:32,992 --> 00:48:35,161
Heavens, "fuck" is a lovely
word.
1070
00:48:35,161 --> 00:48:37,197
I'll have to remember to use
it more frequently.
1071
00:48:38,932 --> 00:48:40,166
Is your outburst intended
to distract
1072
00:48:40,166 --> 00:48:42,268
from the question of proof?
1073
00:48:45,705 --> 00:48:48,641
March 23rd, 1971.
1074
00:48:48,641 --> 00:48:50,410
His obituary, two days later.
1075
00:48:50,410 --> 00:48:52,512
Morton, Illinois.
1076
00:48:52,512 --> 00:48:54,681
Morton Herald.
1077
00:48:54,681 --> 00:48:56,482
Adam Apsey.
1078
00:48:57,550 --> 00:48:58,251
You want proof?
1079
00:48:58,251 --> 00:48:59,285
Do your own research.
1080
00:48:59,285 --> 00:49:00,653
Next question.
1081
00:49:06,860 --> 00:49:08,294
I need to interview
1082
00:49:08,294 --> 00:49:10,563
your clients who've supposedly
succeeded.
1083
00:49:10,563 --> 00:49:13,366
I guarantee my clients
complete confidentiality.
1084
00:49:13,833 --> 00:49:15,468
That's a convenient rule.
1085
00:49:15,468 --> 00:49:17,203
Oh, I suppose your Dr.
Baldwin has allowed
1086
00:49:17,203 --> 00:49:19,505
you to interview those clients
he stole from me?
1087
00:49:19,505 --> 00:49:20,373
Jonathan?
1088
00:49:20,373 --> 00:49:21,441
Do I detect surprise?
1089
00:49:21,441 --> 00:49:24,177
Has he never informed you that
stealing my clients is
1090
00:49:24,177 --> 00:49:25,511
his favorite pastime?
1091
00:49:26,713 --> 00:49:28,882
Your clients?
1092
00:49:28,882 --> 00:49:30,183
If you won't let me talk to
them, then
1093
00:49:30,183 --> 00:49:32,619
all I have is your opinion
that they've changed.
1094
00:49:32,619 --> 00:49:34,354
And if you spoke with them,
1095
00:49:34,354 --> 00:49:36,489
would you believe them, or
insist I brainwashed them?
1096
00:49:36,489 --> 00:49:37,924
Some people would say
that, yes.
1097
00:49:37,924 --> 00:49:41,127
Yes, "some people." Attack
dogs, really.
1098
00:49:41,127 --> 00:49:43,129
They bark and growl simply
because my clients
1099
00:49:43,129 --> 00:49:46,132
have the courage to assume
control of their lives,
1100
00:49:46,132 --> 00:49:48,401
and change themselves to
find happiness,
1101
00:49:48,401 --> 00:49:49,502
while these "some people"
1102
00:49:49,502 --> 00:49:52,705
are wallowing in pain over the
same sexual behaviors
1103
00:49:52,705 --> 00:49:54,240
they're waving their flags
about.
1104
00:49:54,240 --> 00:49:56,009
I'm not in pain over my
sexuality.
1105
00:49:56,009 --> 00:49:57,610
Did I say you?
1106
00:49:57,610 --> 00:49:59,512
That's your inference,
not mine.
1107
00:50:01,180 --> 00:50:01,748
Of course,
1108
00:50:01,748 --> 00:50:03,583
now that you mention it,
anonymous sex
1109
00:50:03,583 --> 00:50:05,485
followed by guilt-ridden
drunken binges--
1110
00:50:05,485 --> 00:50:07,287
That wasn't me. I made it up.
1111
00:50:07,287 --> 00:50:09,322
Oh, "made that up" means your
subconscious mind
1112
00:50:09,322 --> 00:50:11,124
is barking louder than
your conscious.
1113
00:50:11,124 --> 00:50:12,792
Which mind hardly matters.
1114
00:50:12,792 --> 00:50:13,927
As you've pointed out,
1115
00:50:13,927 --> 00:50:16,562
I'm not your client, so don't
try to psychoanalyze me.
1116
00:50:16,562 --> 00:50:18,631
I'm here in a professional
capacity.
1117
00:50:18,631 --> 00:50:20,300
How professional?
1118
00:50:20,300 --> 00:50:21,567
How determined are you to
find out
1119
00:50:21,567 --> 00:50:22,902
if my therapy works?
1120
00:50:22,902 --> 00:50:24,203
Very.
1121
00:50:24,203 --> 00:50:26,439
Only one way. Go through the
process. You change
1122
00:50:26,439 --> 00:50:27,407
you'll know.
1123
00:50:27,407 --> 00:50:28,641
Not possible.
1124
00:50:28,641 --> 00:50:29,475
Well, then,
1125
00:50:29,475 --> 00:50:32,345
Mr. Professional has a
professional dilemma. To write
1126
00:50:32,345 --> 00:50:34,614
my therapy works, you
need proof.
1127
00:50:34,614 --> 00:50:36,549
The only way to obtain
such proof
1128
00:50:36,549 --> 00:50:38,151
is to experience the process.
1129
00:50:38,151 --> 00:50:40,620
Yet, if you write my therapy
doesn't work,
1130
00:50:40,620 --> 00:50:42,622
you'll know you failed
to test it.
1131
00:50:43,089 --> 00:50:44,624
How unprofessional.
1132
00:50:47,193 --> 00:50:48,328
Don't mind-fuck
1133
00:50:48,328 --> 00:50:49,829
me, Doctor.
1134
00:50:49,829 --> 00:50:51,331
Hardly my style, Mister.
1135
00:50:51,331 --> 00:50:53,499
I am merely encouraging in you
1136
00:50:53,499 --> 00:50:55,668
a professionalism I know
you possess.
1137
00:50:57,070 --> 00:50:59,539
I've been to the library to
sample your articles.
1138
00:50:59,539 --> 00:51:02,442
Would you rise above the
tulips?
1139
00:51:02,442 --> 00:51:05,111
The world is filled with weak
organisms.
1140
00:51:05,111 --> 00:51:06,913
Don't be one of them.
1141
00:51:12,485 --> 00:51:14,854
I didn't steal Frankenstein's
clients.
1142
00:51:15,388 --> 00:51:18,024
Some of his clients chose
to see me.
1143
00:51:18,024 --> 00:51:19,892
I'd think you'd be happy,
not upset.
1144
00:51:19,892 --> 00:51:21,060
I'm not upset--
1145
00:51:21,060 --> 00:51:22,462
Excuse me. You seem upset.
1146
00:51:22,462 --> 00:51:23,129
I'm not upset
1147
00:51:23,129 --> 00:51:24,630
you're seeing his clients--
1148
00:51:27,734 --> 00:51:28,534
I'm upset
1149
00:51:28,534 --> 00:51:30,003
you didn't tell me.
1150
00:51:30,003 --> 00:51:31,738
I never discuss my clients
with you.
1151
00:51:31,738 --> 00:51:32,972
Corners, please.
1152
00:51:33,573 --> 00:51:34,340
This is different.
1153
00:51:34,340 --> 00:51:35,508
If you've got men who've
1154
00:51:35,508 --> 00:51:37,543
been through his process, I
need to interview them.
1155
00:51:38,411 --> 00:51:41,481
Uh, no. I can't encourage my
clients to talk to a reporter.
1156
00:51:41,481 --> 00:51:42,548
Any reporter.
1157
00:51:42,548 --> 00:51:43,883
They're too vulnerable.
1158
00:51:43,883 --> 00:51:44,584
Would hurt to ask?
1159
00:51:44,584 --> 00:51:45,451
Yes.
1160
00:51:45,451 --> 00:51:46,452
It's my professional
obligation
1161
00:51:46,452 --> 00:51:47,787
to protect my clients.
1162
00:51:47,787 --> 00:51:50,890
And I'm professionally
obligated to find proof before
1163
00:51:50,890 --> 00:51:52,291
I write he's a fraud.
1164
00:51:52,992 --> 00:51:54,293
My ethics are expendable,
1165
00:51:54,293 --> 00:51:55,495
and yours aren't?
1166
00:51:55,762 --> 00:51:57,063
The proof would be sitting in
your lap
1167
00:51:57,063 --> 00:51:58,631
you hadn't told him you're
a reporter.
1168
00:51:58,631 --> 00:51:59,932
You won't let me talk to
your clients.
1169
00:51:59,932 --> 00:52:02,168
What do you expect me to do?
1170
00:52:02,168 --> 00:52:03,002
Nothing.
1171
00:52:05,671 --> 00:52:06,606
I thought
1172
00:52:07,240 --> 00:52:08,541
you write the article,
1173
00:52:08,541 --> 00:52:11,310
the Board's alerted, Apsey
loses his license.
1174
00:52:12,879 --> 00:52:15,114
Me involving you to keep
my name out of it, was just
1175
00:52:15,114 --> 00:52:18,518
cowardly. I'm going to the
Board to file a complaint.
1176
00:52:19,786 --> 00:52:21,621
What he's doing is worse than
just unethical,
1177
00:52:21,621 --> 00:52:22,355
it's malpractice.
1178
00:52:22,355 --> 00:52:24,757
And if there's any justice,
he'll lose his license.
1179
00:52:24,757 --> 00:52:26,726
Whoa, whoa, whoa. You file a
complaint,
1180
00:52:26,726 --> 00:52:28,027
you sabotage my article.
1181
00:52:28,027 --> 00:52:29,495
You think after Frankenstein's
notified, he'll
1182
00:52:29,495 --> 00:52:30,463
ever talk to me again?
1183
00:52:30,463 --> 00:52:31,964
So what?
1184
00:52:31,964 --> 00:52:34,834
The goal is to stop him. From
me filing a complaint,
1185
00:52:34,834 --> 00:52:36,769
or you writing an article--
what's it matter?
1186
00:52:36,769 --> 00:52:38,471
It matters. It matters to me.
1187
00:52:38,471 --> 00:52:41,474
You challenged me. You can't
un-challenge.
1188
00:52:42,642 --> 00:52:43,076
The other day
1189
00:52:43,076 --> 00:52:44,544
you told me not to quit.
1190
00:52:46,045 --> 00:52:47,680
Don't get in my way.
1191
00:53:09,635 --> 00:53:12,271
This isn't a drop-in clinic.
1192
00:53:13,940 --> 00:53:16,442
I wanted to apologize for
doubting, about your brother.
1193
00:53:16,976 --> 00:53:19,212
And since you're here, I
suppose more questions.
1194
00:53:21,047 --> 00:53:21,581
You do,
1195
00:53:21,581 --> 00:53:23,783
he'll think your apology was
manipulative.
1196
00:53:26,519 --> 00:53:28,788
No. No more questions.
1197
00:53:28,788 --> 00:53:31,457
I'm pleased. If you'd any
more questions,
1198
00:53:31,457 --> 00:53:34,460
how could I not have doubted
the sincerity of your apology?
1199
00:53:36,195 --> 00:53:37,096
Well,
1200
00:53:38,397 --> 00:53:41,501
since you've no new questions
yet, you're here,
1201
00:53:42,802 --> 00:53:45,571
may I ask questions of you?
1202
00:53:47,306 --> 00:53:48,341
Okay.
1203
00:53:49,509 --> 00:53:50,343
How would
1204
00:53:50,343 --> 00:53:52,445
Dr. Arthur Alexander Apsey--
1205
00:53:52,445 --> 00:53:56,549
excuse me, Arthur Alexander
Apsey, PhD--
1206
00:53:57,850 --> 00:54:00,786
a spoonful of alphabet soup
following my name steadies me.
1207
00:54:01,787 --> 00:54:02,922
When I feel off balance,
1208
00:54:02,922 --> 00:54:06,526
my wife scolds me, my
pomposity explodes.
1209
00:54:07,293 --> 00:54:08,861
Gee, gosh darn it, I tell her,
1210
00:54:08,861 --> 00:54:10,730
good thing you're a saint.
1211
00:54:10,730 --> 00:54:12,431
Your question?
1212
00:54:12,431 --> 00:54:13,933
Ah, yes.
1213
00:54:13,933 --> 00:54:18,371
One--is same sex behavior
a clinical pathology?
1214
00:54:19,272 --> 00:54:21,340
No, merely undesirable.
1215
00:54:21,474 --> 00:54:23,910
Heterosexual behavior
is the superior choice.
1216
00:54:24,677 --> 00:54:27,113
Question two--would or could
1217
00:54:27,113 --> 00:54:30,550
I force a male organism
to change his sexual behavior?
1218
00:54:32,485 --> 00:54:33,052
Never.
1219
00:54:33,052 --> 00:54:35,621
Your process only works
on voluntary participants.
1220
00:54:35,821 --> 00:54:38,991
Question three--is same-sex
sex
1221
00:54:38,991 --> 00:54:40,259
natural?
1222
00:54:42,461 --> 00:54:45,097
Homosexual behavior occurs
across many cultures.
1223
00:54:45,898 --> 00:54:47,567
But so what?
1224
00:54:47,567 --> 00:54:49,669
In every society, human beings
kill one another.
1225
00:54:49,669 --> 00:54:51,137
Does that make murder natural?
1226
00:54:51,137 --> 00:54:54,207
If so, then nature is terribly
overrated.
1227
00:54:54,340 --> 00:54:56,509
Congratulations, Mr. Johnston.
1228
00:54:56,509 --> 00:54:59,679
You understand my theories
well enough to parrot.
1229
00:54:59,679 --> 00:55:01,514
You've admittedly no new
questions. Yet,
1230
00:55:01,514 --> 00:55:03,583
here you are. Why?
1231
00:55:04,483 --> 00:55:05,918
I came to apologize.
1232
00:55:05,918 --> 00:55:08,321
A letter or a phone message
would have sufficed.
1233
00:55:08,421 --> 00:55:11,958
Excuse me for being personal.
1234
00:55:12,158 --> 00:55:14,227
Why write such an unlikely
article in the first place?
1235
00:55:15,795 --> 00:55:17,830
Why spew such poorly
crafted lies?
1236
00:55:18,965 --> 00:55:21,500
So, I'd catch you? Force
a confession?
1237
00:55:22,868 --> 00:55:24,203
Why haven't you located
any of the men
1238
00:55:24,203 --> 00:55:26,172
who've completed my therapy?
1239
00:55:26,172 --> 00:55:27,840
As though my refusal to
provide
1240
00:55:27,840 --> 00:55:29,976
their names would have stopped
a more determined reporter.
1241
00:55:31,210 --> 00:55:32,645
And why, today,
1242
00:55:32,645 --> 00:55:34,280
have you no new questions,
1243
00:55:34,280 --> 00:55:35,615
when if I were writing
the article,
1244
00:55:35,615 --> 00:55:37,783
the most important questions
I'd have are still unanswered?
1245
00:55:38,651 --> 00:55:41,153
The only answer that makes
any sense is--what you want,
1246
00:55:41,153 --> 00:55:43,122
you won't admit it.
1247
00:55:43,155 --> 00:55:44,824
Why do you think it's
so impossible
1248
00:55:44,824 --> 00:55:46,459
for someone to like being gay?
1249
00:55:46,459 --> 00:55:48,361
I don't care about Mr.
Someone.
1250
00:55:48,361 --> 00:55:49,962
My undivided attention is
on you.
1251
00:55:49,962 --> 00:55:52,632
You have no idea what it's
like to be this way--
1252
00:55:53,199 --> 00:55:55,268
in a world that despises you.
1253
00:55:55,268 --> 00:55:57,270
Ahh, the blame game.
1254
00:55:57,270 --> 00:55:58,437
Society's abuse,
1255
00:55:58,437 --> 00:56:00,573
The government's neglect.
Always somebody else's fault
1256
00:56:00,573 --> 00:56:02,041
you don't like the way
you are.
1257
00:56:02,041 --> 00:56:05,244
But, just as much of the world
loves you, as hates you.
1258
00:56:05,678 --> 00:56:07,880
Your books, your parades, your
television shows--
1259
00:56:07,880 --> 00:56:10,950
all insisting gay is good, gay
is better, gay is best.
1260
00:56:11,617 --> 00:56:13,286
So if you don't like yourself,
1261
00:56:13,286 --> 00:56:14,520
maybe it's not because of
the world,
1262
00:56:14,520 --> 00:56:17,256
but simply because--you don't
like yourself.
1263
00:56:17,256 --> 00:56:18,224
And given your feelings,
1264
00:56:18,224 --> 00:56:19,525
I don't believe you've
never wondered
1265
00:56:19,525 --> 00:56:21,861
what it'd be like not to have
your sexual desires.
1266
00:56:21,861 --> 00:56:22,895
What gay man hasn't?
1267
00:56:22,895 --> 00:56:23,562
Bingo.
1268
00:56:23,562 --> 00:56:26,565
But, so what? Wondering isn't
the same as wanting.
1269
00:56:26,565 --> 00:56:28,668
I like being gay. I like
being gay.
1270
00:56:28,668 --> 00:56:30,336
I like being gay!
1271
00:56:30,336 --> 00:56:32,138
Is my message getting through?
1272
00:56:32,138 --> 00:56:33,639
Yes. A message is beaming
1273
00:56:33,639 --> 00:56:35,574
through, though not the
one you intend.
1274
00:56:35,574 --> 00:56:37,243
Would someone say, "I like,
I like,
1275
00:56:37,243 --> 00:56:39,879
I like," so fervently if he
really believed it?
1276
00:56:39,879 --> 00:56:41,614
Or do you mutter it into
your pillow every night
1277
00:56:41,614 --> 00:56:44,050
like a mantra, hoping
repetition creates reality?
1278
00:56:45,117 --> 00:56:46,118
Every human
1279
00:56:46,118 --> 00:56:49,121
organism has parts of himself
he doesn't like.
1280
00:56:49,121 --> 00:56:52,858
Exactly. And survival is
finding self love, hunting,
1281
00:56:52,858 --> 00:56:54,193
digging, scraping it up off
the sidewalk,
1282
00:56:54,193 --> 00:56:56,262
if that's what it takes, and
allowing it to grow.
1283
00:56:56,295 --> 00:56:58,164
You choose only to survive?
1284
00:56:58,164 --> 00:57:00,232
What about thrive?
1285
00:57:00,232 --> 00:57:03,235
Survival is, it's talking,
conning yourself
1286
00:57:03,235 --> 00:57:04,437
into self-love. Thriving
1287
00:57:04,437 --> 00:57:07,673
is transforming yourself into
the man you can and do love.
1288
00:57:09,875 --> 00:57:11,344
You remember our first
session?
1289
00:57:11,344 --> 00:57:13,579
I asked you if you wanted
a pill.
1290
00:57:14,213 --> 00:57:16,382
Yeah, I remember.
1291
00:57:16,482 --> 00:57:19,218
Scientists have been
developing them for years.
1292
00:57:19,218 --> 00:57:22,188
It's secret funding, secret
studies.
1293
00:57:22,188 --> 00:57:24,357
This tiny pill
1294
00:57:24,357 --> 00:57:26,559
can forever change your
sexuality.
1295
00:57:28,961 --> 00:57:30,229
Right.
1296
00:57:30,229 --> 00:57:32,164
It's merely a game. Play
with me.
1297
00:57:32,164 --> 00:57:33,733
Not a chance.
1298
00:57:33,733 --> 00:57:34,433
I don't think so.
1299
00:57:35,267 --> 00:57:37,570
Why are you so terrified
of the hypothetical?
1300
00:57:37,570 --> 00:57:39,004
Let the world take a pill.
1301
00:57:39,004 --> 00:57:40,673
Let the world take a pill so
all its hate goes away.
1302
00:57:40,673 --> 00:57:43,042
That pill will never exist
short of a nuclear bomb.
1303
00:57:43,943 --> 00:57:47,046
The world is here to stay,
because the world is inside
1304
00:57:47,046 --> 00:57:48,214
us, inside our heads,
1305
00:57:48,214 --> 00:57:50,983
a world of other people's
voices.
1306
00:57:50,983 --> 00:57:54,019
Some say you're good, okay.
1307
00:57:54,153 --> 00:57:55,554
Some say you're bad or evil.
1308
00:57:55,554 --> 00:57:57,990
But liking or disliking the
way you are--
1309
00:57:59,291 --> 00:58:01,427
how do you know those feelings
are your own,
1310
00:58:01,427 --> 00:58:04,029
or a response to those voices?
1311
00:58:04,029 --> 00:58:06,265
You can't know how you truly
think unless you
1312
00:58:06,298 --> 00:58:07,700
silence those voices.
1313
00:58:09,335 --> 00:58:11,971
Who's chattering in your head?
1314
00:58:13,406 --> 00:58:14,774
No one.
1315
00:58:22,114 --> 00:58:23,382
Jonathan.
1316
00:58:23,983 --> 00:58:25,484
I don't know.
1317
00:58:25,484 --> 00:58:27,953
I could go on all day. There's
so many.
1318
00:58:27,953 --> 00:58:30,122
Exactly. And all together, if
all those voices
1319
00:58:30,122 --> 00:58:32,024
are telling you one thing,
what is it?
1320
00:58:32,024 --> 00:58:33,859
Be a Good Fag.
1321
00:58:33,859 --> 00:58:35,561
Yes. The best little fag in
the world.
1322
00:58:35,561 --> 00:58:37,129
Is that truly what you want?
1323
00:58:37,129 --> 00:58:39,165
Or merely a response to
those voices?
1324
00:58:39,165 --> 00:58:39,865
How can you know,
1325
00:58:39,865 --> 00:58:41,700
unless you remove
those voices.
1326
00:58:41,700 --> 00:58:43,135
You perform exorcisms?
1327
00:58:43,135 --> 00:58:44,203
Quality idea.
1328
00:58:44,670 --> 00:58:46,639
From now on, you hear anyone's
voice in your head you say
1329
00:58:46,639 --> 00:58:50,910
Out! Loudly, firmly. Out!
Say it. Out!
1330
00:58:50,910 --> 00:58:51,343
No.
1331
00:58:51,343 --> 00:58:52,311
Or are you scared?
1332
00:58:52,311 --> 00:58:52,812
Don’t.
1333
00:58:52,812 --> 00:58:53,979
If you eliminate those voices,
1334
00:58:53,979 --> 00:58:54,613
Don't you dare.
1335
00:58:54,613 --> 00:58:55,981
Are you scared there'll be
anything left?
1336
00:58:55,981 --> 00:58:56,582
Don't you dare do it.
1337
00:58:56,582 --> 00:58:57,416
Don't give in to the fear.
1338
00:58:57,416 --> 00:58:58,184
Out!
1339
00:59:00,186 --> 00:59:03,289
Good. Again.
1340
00:59:03,289 --> 00:59:03,989
Out.
1341
00:59:05,090 --> 00:59:05,658
Out.
1342
00:59:06,826 --> 00:59:08,561
I'd be walking around the
streets,
1343
00:59:08,561 --> 00:59:10,062
Out. Out. Out.
1344
00:59:10,062 --> 00:59:12,865
If you can't verbalize it,
snap your fingers. Twice.
1345
00:59:13,165 --> 00:59:15,134
And think it, out.
[snap, snap] Out.
1346
00:59:16,168 --> 00:59:18,704
Out. Snap your fingers.
1347
00:59:18,704 --> 00:59:20,873
Quality. Again.
1348
00:59:21,807 --> 00:59:22,475
Good.
1349
00:59:24,643 --> 00:59:27,046
Now say it. Out. Out.
1350
00:59:27,780 --> 00:59:28,547
Out.
1351
00:59:29,181 --> 00:59:29,949
Out.
1352
00:59:31,150 --> 00:59:31,951
Out.
1353
00:59:34,720 --> 00:59:35,488
Out.
1354
00:59:35,488 --> 00:59:36,155
Quality.
1355
00:59:36,155 --> 00:59:37,756
Now look at the pill.
1356
00:59:44,196 --> 00:59:46,298
It looks like a vitamin.
1357
00:59:46,298 --> 00:59:48,734
The most potent medicine is
often very simple.
1358
00:59:49,935 --> 00:59:50,603
Lick it.
1359
00:59:57,042 --> 00:59:58,143
The taste?
1360
00:59:59,578 --> 01:00:00,779
Nothing.
1361
01:00:00,779 --> 01:00:02,815
Lick it again. Lick it harder.
1362
01:00:07,253 --> 01:00:08,187
It's nothing.
1363
01:00:08,754 --> 01:00:09,889
You're licking with
your tongue.
1364
01:00:10,089 --> 01:00:12,892
Lick with your imagination.
1365
01:00:22,167 --> 01:00:24,003
That's chilled raspberries.
1366
01:00:25,104 --> 01:00:26,071
Smell it.
1367
01:00:29,975 --> 01:00:31,810
A wet forest.
1368
01:00:31,810 --> 01:00:33,812
A tiny pill, looks like a
vitamin
1369
01:00:34,313 --> 01:00:37,483
but tastes like raspberries
and smells like a wet forest.
1370
01:00:39,184 --> 01:00:40,986
What magic.
1371
01:00:43,322 --> 01:00:45,190
Now ignore the hate.
1372
01:00:46,859 --> 01:00:48,761
Ignore the love.
1373
01:00:49,695 --> 01:00:53,566
Ignore the hope. Ignore
the fear. Ignore the world
1374
01:00:53,566 --> 01:00:55,601
that says you're sick.
1375
01:00:55,601 --> 01:00:58,938
Ignore the world that says
you're special.
1376
01:00:58,938 --> 01:01:01,740
Ignore being the evil
homosexual. Ignore
1377
01:01:01,740 --> 01:01:03,776
being the good fag.
1378
01:01:03,776 --> 01:01:06,011
Hypothetically. The Big If.
1379
01:01:07,546 --> 01:01:11,650
If you could obliterate your
same sex desires, would you?
1380
01:01:18,490 --> 01:01:19,692
You hungry?
1381
01:01:44,149 --> 01:01:45,250
You hungry?
1382
01:01:47,119 --> 01:01:47,786
Hungry?
1383
01:01:47,786 --> 01:01:48,821
Hungry?
1384
01:01:53,425 --> 01:01:57,196
Every shirt I own has a
button missing.
1385
01:01:57,396 --> 01:01:58,964
What you say after brunch
with your mom tomorrow
1386
01:01:58,964 --> 01:02:00,366
we go shopping?
1387
01:02:04,536 --> 01:02:05,771
Have you ever,
1388
01:02:08,507 --> 01:02:10,075
if there was a pill,
1389
01:02:10,075 --> 01:02:12,077
to make you straight,
1390
01:02:14,647 --> 01:02:15,614
would you?
1391
01:02:15,614 --> 01:02:17,850
Not in a million years.
1392
01:02:18,317 --> 01:02:19,451
You?
1393
01:02:19,451 --> 01:02:20,452
Not in a billion.
1394
01:02:20,452 --> 01:02:21,654
I love how I am.
1395
01:02:21,654 --> 01:02:23,422
Yeah, me too.
1396
01:02:23,422 --> 01:02:25,324
But for guys who don't,
is trying
1397
01:02:25,324 --> 01:02:28,227
so, I don't know, evil?
1398
01:02:29,128 --> 01:02:30,496
Not evil.
1399
01:02:30,896 --> 01:02:32,231
Useless.
1400
01:02:32,798 --> 01:02:34,533
Yeah, of course.
1401
01:02:34,533 --> 01:02:38,170
But even if, maybe a guy has
the right to try.
1402
01:02:39,171 --> 01:02:41,640
Sure, try.
1403
01:02:41,640 --> 01:02:44,243
Then in a month, or a year
or decade,
1404
01:02:44,243 --> 01:02:44,777
it blows up
1405
01:02:44,777 --> 01:02:47,546
in some woman's face, or some
children's faces, and
1406
01:02:48,147 --> 01:02:51,350
everyone has wounds that burn
for the rest of their lives.
1407
01:02:52,418 --> 01:02:53,952
Shirt's ripped. Toss or sew?
1408
01:02:53,952 --> 01:02:54,520
I don't care.
1409
01:02:55,721 --> 01:02:57,956
I'm asking because I'm
thinking of writing,
1410
01:02:57,956 --> 01:03:00,292
if a guy wants to try that,
it's
1411
01:03:01,193 --> 01:03:04,096
I don't know, maybe it's kinda
sorta not so bad.
1412
01:03:04,997 --> 01:03:06,899
It's a personal choice.
1413
01:03:06,899 --> 01:03:09,368
But a false choice.
1414
01:03:10,169 --> 01:03:12,971
I mean, for hundreds of years,
they've tried to fix us.
1415
01:03:14,039 --> 01:03:15,741
They tried electroshock,
1416
01:03:15,741 --> 01:03:17,943
pumping us full of hormones,
full of drugs,
1417
01:03:17,943 --> 01:03:19,611
cutting our brains, cutting
our--
1418
01:03:19,611 --> 01:03:21,213
Apsey doesn't do those things.
1419
01:03:21,213 --> 01:03:23,449
Frankenstein uses words.
1420
01:03:23,449 --> 01:03:24,983
No difference.
1421
01:03:24,983 --> 01:03:27,319
Whatever they try, we're
still here
1422
01:03:27,319 --> 01:03:31,724
and always will be, because
it never works.
1423
01:03:31,990 --> 01:03:32,758
Out.
1424
01:03:33,926 --> 01:03:35,360
I can't believe I just
did that.
1425
01:03:35,661 --> 01:03:36,462
Out?
1426
01:03:37,129 --> 01:03:39,131
Oh, something Apsey said.
1427
01:03:39,498 --> 01:03:40,132
Oh?
1428
01:03:40,132 --> 01:03:42,101
You know, if you and I
are arguing
1429
01:03:42,101 --> 01:03:43,869
and we come to a standstill--
1430
01:03:43,869 --> 01:03:45,904
Wait a minute.
1431
01:03:46,371 --> 01:03:47,806
You're not talking to
Frankenstein
1432
01:03:47,806 --> 01:03:50,209
about our private life,
are you?
1433
01:03:50,209 --> 01:03:51,410
That's what one does in
1434
01:03:51,410 --> 01:03:52,611
therapy.
1435
01:03:52,678 --> 01:03:53,812
He's not your therapist.
1436
01:03:53,812 --> 01:03:55,013
He's research. Remember?
1437
01:03:55,180 --> 01:03:57,416
Yeah. 'Course. He's research.
1438
01:04:00,352 --> 01:04:01,253
Frank,
1439
01:04:05,157 --> 01:04:08,093
promise me you won't go back.
1440
01:04:09,027 --> 01:04:10,729
He's dangerous.
1441
01:04:10,729 --> 01:04:13,832
He will open your skull like
cracking an egg
1442
01:04:13,832 --> 01:04:15,134
and reach his hands in
1443
01:04:15,134 --> 01:04:18,203
and he will kneed your brain
like dough.
1444
01:04:18,203 --> 01:04:18,971
Until you won't even
remember
1445
01:04:18,971 --> 01:04:21,306
you have a penis, let alone
what you like to do with it.
1446
01:04:22,274 --> 01:04:23,709
I've seen it.
1447
01:04:23,709 --> 01:04:26,411
I have four clients who've
told me how Frankenstein
1448
01:04:26,411 --> 01:04:29,248
has crept into their heads and
destroyed their lives.
1449
01:04:29,248 --> 01:04:31,416
Please. Promise me you won't
go back.
1450
01:04:32,184 --> 01:04:33,652
You've seen the damage
he does.
1451
01:04:33,652 --> 01:04:35,154
I haven't.
1452
01:04:37,923 --> 01:04:38,724
Okay.
1453
01:04:40,125 --> 01:04:41,627
A new client started
yesterday.
1454
01:04:41,627 --> 01:04:42,761
A pickup from Apsey.
1455
01:04:42,761 --> 01:04:43,328
Hello?
1456
01:04:43,328 --> 01:04:44,963
He's been seeing Frankenstein
for about two years.
1457
01:04:44,963 --> 01:04:47,132
Who? How? Don't you wonder
how?
1458
01:04:47,232 --> 01:04:48,066
Jonathan,
1459
01:04:48,066 --> 01:04:49,501
I'm wondering, with hundreds
of gay
1460
01:04:49,501 --> 01:04:52,871
therapists in this city,
somehow all of
1461
01:04:52,871 --> 01:04:55,541
Dr. Apsey's ex-clients
end up seeing you.
1462
01:04:55,541 --> 01:04:57,409
How do they find you?
1463
01:04:57,409 --> 01:04:59,044
You develop a reputation.
1464
01:04:59,044 --> 01:04:59,645
Ha!
1465
01:04:59,645 --> 01:05:01,747
This new client, I could ask
about you
1466
01:05:01,747 --> 01:05:03,315
getting an interview.
1467
01:05:03,315 --> 01:05:03,882
Double ha!
1468
01:05:03,882 --> 01:05:04,416
If--
1469
01:05:04,416 --> 01:05:05,083
Beware the if--
1470
01:05:05,083 --> 01:05:05,751
If?
1471
01:05:05,751 --> 01:05:08,654
If you promise me never to
see Frankenstein again.
1472
01:05:09,555 --> 01:05:11,290
You're, you're, you’re--
1473
01:05:11,290 --> 01:05:11,924
He's bribing you.
1474
01:05:11,924 --> 01:05:13,258
You're bribing me?
1475
01:05:13,258 --> 01:05:15,194
Although technically, there's
no exchange of money or goods.
1476
01:05:15,194 --> 01:05:16,261
I mean, you're, you're--
1477
01:05:16,261 --> 01:05:17,362
More like blackmail.
1478
01:05:17,396 --> 01:05:18,530
You're blackmailing me.
1479
01:05:18,530 --> 01:05:19,731
Not precisely blackmail, either.
1480
01:05:19,731 --> 01:05:20,766
I can't believe you.
1481
01:05:20,766 --> 01:05:23,135
I just want to be clear here,
because if you're really--
1482
01:05:23,569 --> 01:05:25,270
You're resorting to--
1483
01:05:25,270 --> 01:05:26,471
He's manipulating you.
1484
01:05:26,471 --> 01:05:27,372
I'm manipulating you.
1485
01:05:27,372 --> 01:05:29,608
How dare you try to
manipulate me,
1486
01:05:29,608 --> 01:05:31,977
you ask this new client,
or you don't.
1487
01:05:31,977 --> 01:05:34,446
No strings attached.
1488
01:05:34,446 --> 01:05:36,181
All right, I will ask.
1489
01:05:36,181 --> 01:05:37,783
No strings attached.
1490
01:05:37,783 --> 01:05:39,585
What a weak organism.
1491
01:05:39,585 --> 01:05:41,353
No. If you think it's
unprofessional.
1492
01:05:41,353 --> 01:05:43,422
You are stronger
than that, Mr. Johnson.
1493
01:05:43,488 --> 01:05:46,124
Do it. Don't. Ask. Don't ask.
1494
01:05:46,124 --> 01:05:46,992
I'm getting whiplash.
1495
01:05:46,992 --> 01:05:49,828
You are stronger--
1496
01:05:49,828 --> 01:05:50,963
Fuck professionalism.
1497
01:05:50,963 --> 01:05:51,630
I have.
1498
01:05:52,464 --> 01:05:53,699
Ask.
1499
01:05:54,066 --> 01:05:57,402
I don't consider my therapy,
conversion therapy.
1500
01:05:57,402 --> 01:06:00,606
I consider my therapy--
1501
01:06:00,606 --> 01:06:01,373
therapy.
1502
01:06:01,373 --> 01:06:03,675
Dr Apsey never, never
1503
01:06:04,743 --> 01:06:07,746
encouraged me to do anything
against my own will.
1504
01:06:07,746 --> 01:06:09,514
People come to me.
1505
01:06:09,514 --> 01:06:11,383
I do not seek them out.
1506
01:06:11,383 --> 01:06:14,052
And I try to make their lives
better.
1507
01:06:14,253 --> 01:06:17,689
The repercussions of Apsey's
work were severe.
1508
01:06:17,923 --> 01:06:20,292
I believed that I was doing
the right thing
1509
01:06:20,659 --> 01:06:23,428
for the good of my clients
who have suffered
1510
01:06:23,762 --> 01:06:27,799
from this kind of junk
science for far too long.
1511
01:06:33,338 --> 01:06:34,473
I've been clear--
1512
01:06:34,473 --> 01:06:36,608
unannounced drop-bys are
unacceptable.
1513
01:06:39,278 --> 01:06:40,746
You have severe boundary
issues.
1514
01:06:40,746 --> 01:06:42,381
Yesterday that, that
magic pill,
1515
01:06:42,381 --> 01:06:45,684
so-called, "game" was so, so,
so manipulative.
1516
01:06:45,717 --> 01:06:47,152
I prefer the label, truth
1517
01:06:47,152 --> 01:06:49,521
facilitation. I offer
a mirror.
1518
01:06:49,521 --> 01:06:52,391
Okay. So, maybe a mirror
because swallowing a pill
1519
01:06:52,391 --> 01:06:55,193
maybe reflects, shows, that,
that there's some part,
1520
01:06:55,193 --> 01:06:58,931
some teeny tiny, so teeny tiny
part wants, maybe wants
1521
01:06:58,931 --> 01:07:00,465
what you have to offer. Okay.
1522
01:07:00,465 --> 01:07:02,634
But so, so, so what? This,
this, this change,
1523
01:07:02,634 --> 01:07:05,070
supposed change--oh you say,
you say it's not easy,
1524
01:07:05,070 --> 01:07:06,872
you say it's the most
difficult thing to ever do.
1525
01:07:06,872 --> 01:07:08,407
But what you don't say, is,
1526
01:07:08,407 --> 01:07:11,443
the word you don't use,
is--impossible.
1527
01:07:11,576 --> 01:07:12,311
Yes, Dr. Baldwin
1528
01:07:12,311 --> 01:07:13,679
and his clones have worked
1529
01:07:13,679 --> 01:07:16,081
tirelessly to promote the myth
of impossibility.
1530
01:07:16,782 --> 01:07:18,951
But, I know, deep down,
I was born this.
1531
01:07:19,151 --> 01:07:20,052
So what?
1532
01:07:20,085 --> 01:07:20,986
It's in my genes,
1533
01:07:20,986 --> 01:07:23,288
I have no control over
my attractions. Ha, ha,
1534
01:07:23,322 --> 01:07:24,990
phooey, fifty types of bunk.
1535
01:07:24,990 --> 01:07:26,658
So maybe a chunk of your
hypothalamus
1536
01:07:26,658 --> 01:07:27,993
is bigger than the average
bear's,
1537
01:07:27,993 --> 01:07:29,861
or your mother dressed you
in taffeta,
1538
01:07:29,861 --> 01:07:32,130
or your father was weak and
distant, or your big brother
1539
01:07:32,297 --> 01:07:33,799
told you vaginas have teeth.
1540
01:07:33,799 --> 01:07:38,337
Who cares why? Inside each
of us is the liar,
1541
01:07:38,337 --> 01:07:44,142
the thief, the killer, but
also the saint, the healer,
1542
01:07:44,142 --> 01:07:45,243
the lover.
1543
01:07:45,777 --> 01:07:48,113
Isn't life about the parts
of ourselves
1544
01:07:48,313 --> 01:07:51,950
we choose to cultivate and act
upon? Isn't America
1545
01:07:51,950 --> 01:07:54,086
based on the belief of
bettering ourselves,
1546
01:07:54,086 --> 01:07:57,122
of picking ourselves up,
rising above? Transcendence?
1547
01:07:58,824 --> 01:08:00,459
In India,
1548
01:08:00,959 --> 01:08:04,463
a master walks across coals
600 degrees Fahrenheit.
1549
01:08:04,663 --> 01:08:07,099
His feet remain unburned.
1550
01:08:07,099 --> 01:08:08,800
A yogi locks himself in
a vault
1551
01:08:08,800 --> 01:08:11,503
with just enough oxygen
for an hour,
1552
01:08:11,503 --> 01:08:13,338
yet he slows down his
heartbeat
1553
01:08:13,338 --> 01:08:15,841
so that oxygen last a day
instead of an hour.
1554
01:08:17,442 --> 01:08:20,679
You tell me the human mind
can accomplish these marvels,
1555
01:08:20,812 --> 01:08:23,515
yet can't control where you
want to put your pee-pee?
1556
01:08:24,616 --> 01:08:25,650
I don't think so.
1557
01:08:25,650 --> 01:08:28,353
But a man walks on coals,
1558
01:08:28,353 --> 01:08:29,454
I can see that.
1559
01:08:29,454 --> 01:08:32,424
Yet a man says he's changed
and you refuse to believe
1560
01:08:32,424 --> 01:08:34,793
that. But it doesn't matter
whether you want to believe
1561
01:08:34,793 --> 01:08:37,763
my therapy works or not,
because you still
1562
01:08:37,763 --> 01:08:38,663
have to choose.
1563
01:08:39,331 --> 01:08:41,600
A year from now, or
five years, or ten years,
1564
01:08:41,600 --> 01:08:45,237
there's going to be a shot, or
a gene therapy, or a tiny pill
1565
01:08:45,237 --> 01:08:47,639
that tastes like raspberries,
smells like a wet forest.
1566
01:08:48,673 --> 01:08:51,343
Sexual attraction will change
as easily as hair color.
1567
01:08:51,777 --> 01:08:54,379
Clinging to the illusion
that my therapy doesn't work
1568
01:08:54,379 --> 01:08:56,248
nearly postpones the
inevitable.
1569
01:08:56,248 --> 01:09:01,386
You. Everybody like you--
Will. Have. To. Choose.
1570
01:09:01,386 --> 01:09:02,320
So? So what?
1571
01:09:02,320 --> 01:09:03,321
What am I going to do?
1572
01:09:03,321 --> 01:09:06,691
I'm going to just renounce?
Betray? Just reset my sights
1573
01:09:06,691 --> 01:09:07,993
and aim for heterosexuality,
1574
01:09:07,993 --> 01:09:10,929
because sometime in the
future, it will be possible?
1575
01:09:10,929 --> 01:09:12,297
I don't care what you choose.
1576
01:09:12,297 --> 01:09:15,000
The motives behind my magic
pill game were self-serving.
1577
01:09:15,567 --> 01:09:17,803
So you could experience
the view
1578
01:09:17,803 --> 01:09:19,304
from my clients vantage.
1579
01:09:19,304 --> 01:09:20,705
So your journalistic
portrait of me
1580
01:09:20,705 --> 01:09:22,040
would be more comprehensive.
1581
01:09:22,040 --> 01:09:25,310
So, so, the magic pill was to
manipulate me into sympathy?
1582
01:09:25,310 --> 01:09:26,511
No more manipulative than
the so-called
1583
01:09:26,511 --> 01:09:29,347
professional tactics you've
used on me.
1584
01:09:29,347 --> 01:09:31,316
Considering the precarious
position in which you put me,
1585
01:09:31,316 --> 01:09:33,085
I think I'll be forgiven if
my magic pill
1586
01:09:33,085 --> 01:09:34,486
game was self-serving. Now,
1587
01:09:35,420 --> 01:09:36,922
no more dropping by.
1588
01:09:36,922 --> 01:09:39,891
I don't ever want to see
you again.
1589
01:09:39,891 --> 01:09:41,259
Good luck with your article.
1590
01:09:41,259 --> 01:09:43,395
Thank you for allowing me
to express my thoughts.
1591
01:09:43,462 --> 01:09:45,730
Be well. Be happy.
1592
01:09:45,730 --> 01:09:46,932
Be gay.
1593
01:09:49,868 --> 01:09:51,203
You're up late.
1594
01:09:51,470 --> 01:09:52,871
You're out late.
1595
01:09:53,171 --> 01:09:54,673
Dinner's cold.
1596
01:09:54,973 --> 01:09:56,274
I'm colder.
1597
01:09:56,274 --> 01:09:57,709
Come warm me up.
1598
01:10:02,514 --> 01:10:03,115
You eat?
1599
01:10:03,115 --> 01:10:03,815
Nope.
1600
01:10:03,815 --> 01:10:04,449
Tupperware.
1601
01:10:04,683 --> 01:10:06,118
Smells good.
1602
01:10:06,418 --> 01:10:07,986
It's the bread. Bananas were
rotting.
1603
01:10:07,986 --> 01:10:10,122
I left something out, though.
It chews like lead.
1604
01:10:10,155 --> 01:10:12,924
I'm sure it's delicious.
1605
01:10:15,093 --> 01:10:16,595
He said no.
1606
01:10:18,730 --> 01:10:20,198
He who?
1607
01:10:20,198 --> 01:10:22,100
My new client. About an
interview.
1608
01:10:25,403 --> 01:10:26,938
Well, then the others.
1609
01:10:26,938 --> 01:10:28,406
If you could ask one, you
could ask the others.
1610
01:10:28,406 --> 01:10:28,874
Frank.
1611
01:10:28,874 --> 01:10:30,876
I'd be careful, respectful.
I'd give you a list of questions.
1612
01:10:30,876 --> 01:10:31,243
Frank.
1613
01:10:31,243 --> 01:10:32,410
One might be willing
to talk to me.
1614
01:10:32,410 --> 01:10:33,678
Frank, I already brought
the subject up,
1615
01:10:33,678 --> 01:10:34,646
as a hypothetical.
1616
01:10:34,746 --> 01:10:36,248
They said no.
1617
01:10:38,016 --> 01:10:38,984
All of them?
1618
01:10:40,318 --> 01:10:40,919
Yeah.
1619
01:10:40,919 --> 01:10:42,287
How convenient.
1620
01:10:43,722 --> 01:10:44,856
How many?
1621
01:10:46,158 --> 01:10:46,758
Four.
1622
01:10:46,758 --> 01:10:47,792
All four?
1623
01:10:49,661 --> 01:10:50,495
All four.
1624
01:10:50,495 --> 01:10:51,096
How amazing.
1625
01:10:51,096 --> 01:10:52,264
What an amazing show
of solidarity.
1626
01:10:52,264 --> 01:10:53,231
Except they're not
1627
01:10:53,231 --> 01:10:53,865
all acquainted--
1628
01:10:53,865 --> 01:10:54,799
Except they don't know each
other,
1629
01:10:54,799 --> 01:10:57,269
so it's not solidarity,
but coincidence.
1630
01:10:57,269 --> 01:11:00,172
So this is an amazing
coincidence that all four
1631
01:11:00,172 --> 01:11:01,907
have so quickly dismissed
being interviewed.
1632
01:11:01,907 --> 01:11:03,041
You don't believe me?
1633
01:11:03,041 --> 01:11:05,143
Such razor sharp perception
skills.
1634
01:11:05,143 --> 01:11:07,212
Why would you lie?
1635
01:11:07,212 --> 01:11:08,513
How long have we been
together?
1636
01:11:08,513 --> 01:11:09,848
Oh, how patronizing.
1637
01:11:09,848 --> 01:11:11,416
Why do you put up with this?
1638
01:11:11,416 --> 01:11:12,918
Don't patronize me. You know
as well as I do--
1639
01:11:12,918 --> 01:11:16,454
In all our six years, four
months and thirteen days--
1640
01:11:16,621 --> 01:11:18,723
yes, I know exactly--
1641
01:11:18,723 --> 01:11:20,625
before Frankenstein entered
your life,
1642
01:11:20,625 --> 01:11:22,694
do you remember even once,
not trusting me?
1643
01:11:22,694 --> 01:11:24,062
I hardly have the power to
make you distrust one another.
1644
01:11:24,062 --> 01:11:26,431
Dr. Apsey can't make us
distrust each other.
1645
01:11:26,431 --> 01:11:27,566
Yeah, he can.
1646
01:11:28,667 --> 01:11:30,101
It wasn't until after all
this started
1647
01:11:30,101 --> 01:11:31,536
that I began distrusting you.
1648
01:11:31,536 --> 01:11:33,672
You never used to hide things
from me.
1649
01:11:33,672 --> 01:11:35,707
I'm not now.
1650
01:11:39,177 --> 01:11:41,713
Your editor called this
afternoon.
1651
01:11:41,713 --> 01:11:43,715
I asked her how she thought
the article was going.
1652
01:11:43,715 --> 01:11:45,717
She said, "what article?"
1653
01:11:45,717 --> 01:11:48,053
The article you told me she
was so anxious to see.
1654
01:11:48,053 --> 01:11:50,355
She had no idea what I was
talking about.
1655
01:11:50,522 --> 01:11:51,823
You had no right--
1656
01:11:51,823 --> 01:11:53,959
I asked anyway. I'm not sorry.
1657
01:11:53,959 --> 01:11:56,394
Because I never had a vision
for the article. I wasn't
1658
01:11:56,394 --> 01:11:58,496
gonna put myself out on
a limb, 'til I was certain.
1659
01:11:58,496 --> 01:12:00,332
So, you lied to me.
1660
01:12:00,332 --> 01:12:02,867
I, I, I withheld minor
information.
1661
01:12:02,867 --> 01:12:03,969
You never used to lie to me
1662
01:12:03,969 --> 01:12:05,804
until you started seeing
Frankenstein.
1663
01:12:05,804 --> 01:12:07,839
That absolutely cannot be
pinned on me.
1664
01:12:07,839 --> 01:12:09,140
The day we met,
1665
01:12:09,140 --> 01:12:11,710
you asked if I had plans
for Saturday night.
1666
01:12:11,710 --> 01:12:13,979
I answered no, then rushed
to the nearest pay phone
1667
01:12:13,979 --> 01:12:16,381
to cancel them. It's not a
big lie, but a lie.
1668
01:12:16,715 --> 01:12:18,049
I lied about that plaid tie
you love
1669
01:12:18,049 --> 01:12:19,918
when I said, it's only
mildly unpleasant,
1670
01:12:19,918 --> 01:12:22,187
but in fact, it's
extraordinarily ugly.
1671
01:12:22,187 --> 01:12:23,855
I've lied between the sheets
that that thing
1672
01:12:23,855 --> 01:12:25,523
you do with the feather
feels good,
1673
01:12:25,523 --> 01:12:27,525
when it just scratches.
1674
01:12:27,525 --> 01:12:28,827
I've lied about liking this
1675
01:12:28,827 --> 01:12:31,363
sugar-free, fat-free
banana bread lead
1676
01:12:31,363 --> 01:12:33,031
slop you make. I've
probably lied to you daily.
1677
01:12:33,031 --> 01:12:34,833
You got a spare month? I'll
make a list.
1678
01:12:34,833 --> 01:12:35,533
And yes,
1679
01:12:35,533 --> 01:12:37,802
I lied about pitching the
article
1680
01:12:37,802 --> 01:12:39,738
before I'd ever set eyes on
Dr. Apsey.
1681
01:12:39,738 --> 01:12:42,040
So if you didn't believe in
the article, why--
1682
01:12:42,040 --> 01:12:43,742
Because I always do what
you want.
1683
01:12:46,111 --> 01:12:47,612
Did. Past tense. Did.
1684
01:12:47,612 --> 01:12:48,947
And will you?
Write the article?
1685
01:12:48,947 --> 01:12:49,781
Of course.
1686
01:12:49,781 --> 01:12:50,815
When?
1687
01:12:50,815 --> 01:12:52,417
Unrelenting, isn't he?
1688
01:12:52,417 --> 01:12:53,551
When I'm ready.
1689
01:12:53,551 --> 01:12:56,254
Show me. Whatever you have.
1690
01:12:57,656 --> 01:13:00,425
Anything? I haven't even seen
a single word--
1691
01:13:00,425 --> 01:13:01,459
It's in my head.
1692
01:13:01,459 --> 01:13:03,428
I'll put it on paper when I
complete my research.
1693
01:13:03,428 --> 01:13:07,265
And, an estimated
completion date?
1694
01:13:09,034 --> 01:13:10,902
The banana bread's not so bad.
1695
01:13:10,902 --> 01:13:12,304
You're too hard on yourself.
1696
01:13:29,487 --> 01:13:31,790
I know you didn't want to
see me again. And I Know--
1697
01:13:31,790 --> 01:13:32,657
Yes, yes, yes,
1698
01:13:32,657 --> 01:13:34,292
I expected you back.
1699
01:13:34,292 --> 01:13:35,126
You did?
1700
01:13:35,327 --> 01:13:36,127
Yes.
1701
01:13:37,595 --> 01:13:38,763
Of course.
1702
01:13:39,064 --> 01:13:40,298
But why?
1703
01:13:40,732 --> 01:13:42,167
You can answer that yourself.
1704
01:13:42,934 --> 01:13:44,769
I'm here for the article.
1705
01:13:45,603 --> 01:13:46,504
The article,
1706
01:13:46,504 --> 01:13:47,972
the article, the article.
1707
01:13:47,972 --> 01:13:48,573
Look me in the eye.
1708
01:13:48,573 --> 01:13:49,841
Tell me you've written even
one sentence.
1709
01:13:51,910 --> 01:13:52,544
I thought not. Now,
1710
01:13:52,544 --> 01:13:54,045
the unanswered question--
1711
01:13:54,045 --> 01:13:56,981
Was your smokescreen
conscious or not?
1712
01:13:58,717 --> 01:14:02,087
Okay, listen, if a man--
not me--hypothetical.
1713
01:14:02,087 --> 01:14:05,323
If a man wanted to see you for
therapy but couldn't.
1714
01:14:05,323 --> 01:14:06,758
Couldn't?
1715
01:14:06,758 --> 01:14:08,293
Yes. Say, he couldn't
afford it.
1716
01:14:08,893 --> 01:14:10,795
I'd offer for free.
1717
01:14:10,795 --> 01:14:12,831
No, free has no value. I
charge one dollar.
1718
01:14:13,531 --> 01:14:13,998
Okay.
1719
01:14:13,998 --> 01:14:16,267
Not because he couldn't pay,
but for some other reason.
1720
01:14:16,267 --> 01:14:17,569
Whatever. He can't see you.
1721
01:14:17,569 --> 01:14:21,606
But he might want to kind of
sort of maybe work on his own.
1722
01:14:21,606 --> 01:14:23,308
What would you tell him?
1723
01:14:23,308 --> 01:14:25,844
I would ask this man--
1724
01:14:25,844 --> 01:14:27,512
when's the last time he
had dinner
1725
01:14:27,512 --> 01:14:28,847
with a male organism who
didn't
1726
01:14:28,847 --> 01:14:30,248
share his sexual leanings?
1727
01:14:30,248 --> 01:14:33,084
If it'd been a long,
long time?
1728
01:14:33,084 --> 01:14:34,919
That would suggest
1729
01:14:34,919 --> 01:14:39,190
Mr. Hypothetical lacks
comfort with the male gender.
1730
01:14:39,190 --> 01:14:41,159
All men have same-gender
needs.
1731
01:14:41,159 --> 01:14:44,262
If humankind could accept
same-gender emotional needs
1732
01:14:44,262 --> 01:14:46,431
as normal, homosexual
behavior would disappear.
1733
01:14:46,431 --> 01:14:49,667
But, close-minded organisms
label same-gender
1734
01:14:49,667 --> 01:14:50,869
needs as gay.
1735
01:14:50,869 --> 01:14:54,305
So if you feel and admit
same-gender needs--
1736
01:14:54,372 --> 01:14:57,442
you're gay. But you're not!
You have same-gender needs.
1737
01:14:57,442 --> 01:14:58,109
That's all.
1738
01:14:59,244 --> 01:15:00,678
But--back to
1739
01:15:00,678 --> 01:15:05,817
Mr. Hypothetical. Meet men
without his leanings.
1740
01:15:05,817 --> 01:15:08,153
Study how they interact, how
they express,
1741
01:15:08,153 --> 01:15:10,789
or repress their same-gender
needs.
1742
01:15:11,322 --> 01:15:13,925
Become friends with the type
of man he wants to be.
1743
01:15:13,925 --> 01:15:14,759
And reading.
1744
01:15:14,759 --> 01:15:16,628
I'd offer a list of books
that--really,
1745
01:15:16,628 --> 01:15:18,163
Mr. Johnston, must we maintain
1746
01:15:18,163 --> 01:15:19,664
this pretense of the
hypothetical?
1747
01:15:19,664 --> 01:15:20,765
Yes. We must.
1748
01:15:25,303 --> 01:15:27,705
Would you care to peruse
the list I'd offer
1749
01:15:27,705 --> 01:15:28,673
Mr. Hypothetical?
1750
01:15:28,673 --> 01:15:29,441
No.
1751
01:15:30,241 --> 01:15:31,075
Yes.
1752
01:15:31,443 --> 01:15:32,277
No.
1753
01:15:33,978 --> 01:15:34,879
Maybe.
1754
01:15:37,081 --> 01:15:38,416
If it's handy.
1755
01:15:44,155 --> 01:15:46,524
Hi. Sorry I'm late. Subway.
1756
01:15:47,292 --> 01:15:49,360
Subway's been screwed up a
lot lately.
1757
01:15:49,894 --> 01:15:50,428
Yeah.
1758
01:15:53,097 --> 01:15:55,433
You were out late last night.
1759
01:15:56,634 --> 01:15:58,803
Were you staying away 'til
I was asleep?
1760
01:15:58,803 --> 01:16:02,006
Absolutely not.
1761
01:16:03,041 --> 01:16:05,643
Ah, well, maybe.
1762
01:16:05,643 --> 01:16:07,378
I'm tired of fighting.
1763
01:16:07,612 --> 01:16:08,947
Come on, let's play.
1764
01:16:09,747 --> 01:16:13,818
You gonna tell me where
you were?
1765
01:16:13,818 --> 01:16:14,686
I was out walking.
1766
01:16:16,187 --> 01:16:16,788
Serve.
1767
01:16:19,491 --> 01:16:21,025
You reeked of cigarette smoke.
1768
01:16:24,262 --> 01:16:25,363
I thought you were asleep.
1769
01:16:25,363 --> 01:16:26,531
I wasn't.
1770
01:16:29,267 --> 01:16:30,602
One--nothing.
1771
01:16:35,807 --> 01:16:36,407
So?
1772
01:16:38,877 --> 01:16:40,144
Went to a sports bar.
1773
01:16:40,645 --> 01:16:41,412
You know,
1774
01:16:41,846 --> 01:16:44,415
studying straight men in
their natural habitat.
1775
01:16:45,884 --> 01:16:47,085
Research?
1776
01:16:48,820 --> 01:16:50,522
How's the article going?
1777
01:16:50,522 --> 01:16:52,190
Don't wanna talk about that.
1778
01:16:52,991 --> 01:16:54,092
Not going well?
1779
01:16:55,159 --> 01:16:57,795
The idea was yours, but now
the article is mine.
1780
01:16:57,795 --> 01:16:59,831
From here on, Apsey's
off limits.
1781
01:17:00,164 --> 01:17:01,266
Two--nothing.
1782
01:17:12,510 --> 01:17:13,711
Why'd you move up our
racquetball time?
1783
01:17:13,711 --> 01:17:14,979
You're changing the subject.
1784
01:17:14,979 --> 01:17:17,181
Yeah, I know. Meeting
canceled?
1785
01:17:17,181 --> 01:17:18,216
I didn't wanna go.
1786
01:17:18,216 --> 01:17:20,151
Jonathan Baldwin, not in the
mood for a meeting.
1787
01:17:20,151 --> 01:17:21,953
Has the sky fallen?
1788
01:17:21,953 --> 01:17:22,720
Yeah.
1789
01:17:26,457 --> 01:17:27,959
It's my serve.
1790
01:17:36,467 --> 01:17:37,035
Please tell me
1791
01:17:37,035 --> 01:17:39,070
you're not seeing Frankenstein
for real.
1792
01:17:40,772 --> 01:17:41,606
[snap, snap]
1793
01:17:42,407 --> 01:17:43,908
You've mastered that.
1794
01:17:43,908 --> 01:17:45,944
Have you ever considered
communicating with words?
1795
01:17:45,944 --> 01:17:48,580
Don't call him Frankenstein.
His name is Arthur Apsey.
1796
01:17:48,580 --> 01:17:49,581
Sweetheart,
1797
01:17:50,315 --> 01:17:51,149
I'm sorry
1798
01:17:51,149 --> 01:17:52,350
if you were born a way
1799
01:17:52,350 --> 01:17:55,253
you don't want to be. But you
can't change that.
1800
01:17:56,154 --> 01:17:58,189
Not, I don't want you to,
but can't.
1801
01:18:04,128 --> 01:18:07,332
You used to melt in my arms.
1802
01:18:08,232 --> 01:18:10,134
Now you repel.
1803
01:18:15,073 --> 01:18:17,375
When was the last time
we made love?
1804
01:18:17,375 --> 01:18:18,810
That event was not
momentous enough
1805
01:18:18,810 --> 01:18:20,044
to mark on my calendar.
1806
01:18:20,044 --> 01:18:21,613
Five weeks, two days.
1807
01:18:21,913 --> 01:18:23,281
Plenty of couples go
five weeks.
1808
01:18:23,281 --> 01:18:26,284
You first met Frankenstein,
what, six, seven weeks ago?
1809
01:18:27,685 --> 01:18:29,320
Coincidence?
1810
01:18:31,289 --> 01:18:33,524
And those men you were with
at the bar--
1811
01:18:34,459 --> 01:18:35,426
if they're so straight,
1812
01:18:35,426 --> 01:18:37,428
why did I smell them on
your clothes?
1813
01:18:38,529 --> 01:18:40,632
Why do I smell them on
your skin?
1814
01:18:44,769 --> 01:18:46,537
Please tell me you were safe.
1815
01:18:47,038 --> 01:18:48,439
I, I didn't--
1816
01:18:48,439 --> 01:18:49,674
No lies. Yes or no?
1817
01:18:49,674 --> 01:18:51,075
Did you have sex with
another man?
1818
01:18:51,075 --> 01:18:51,943
No!
1819
01:18:55,813 --> 01:18:57,115
No.
1820
01:19:08,192 --> 01:19:09,260
Remember I told you
1821
01:19:10,928 --> 01:19:13,364
in high school, you know?
1822
01:19:13,364 --> 01:19:14,732
Yeah, I remember.
1823
01:19:14,732 --> 01:19:15,400
I lied.
1824
01:19:16,334 --> 01:19:18,403
I was never bashed.
1825
01:19:19,570 --> 01:19:21,439
It never happened?
1826
01:19:21,439 --> 01:19:22,774
It happened.
1827
01:19:23,908 --> 01:19:25,109
Only not the way I told you.
1828
01:19:38,089 --> 01:19:40,458
The hell-hole I grew up in
1829
01:19:40,458 --> 01:19:42,994
had a town punk.
1830
01:19:46,964 --> 01:19:48,433
Every now and then, when the
beer wouldn't
1831
01:19:48,433 --> 01:19:50,501
anesthetize the boredom,
the town punk,
1832
01:19:50,501 --> 01:19:54,372
and his gang of punk wannabes
would drive up to Chicago,
1833
01:19:54,372 --> 01:19:57,308
and set up bar in an open
flatbed of a pickup,
1834
01:19:58,810 --> 01:20:02,046
spitting epithets at shoppers
who fell into
1835
01:20:02,046 --> 01:20:04,782
the category loosely described
as fruity.
1836
01:20:08,653 --> 01:20:12,490
One summer night, they spied
a boy who
1837
01:20:12,490 --> 01:20:16,060
they laughed, was so fruity he
could pose for a still life.
1838
01:20:19,797 --> 01:20:22,366
The fruity boy fought back.
1839
01:20:22,366 --> 01:20:25,269
The fruity boy got hit.
1840
01:20:25,269 --> 01:20:26,637
Got kicked.
1841
01:20:27,438 --> 01:20:30,108
Got a broken beer bottle
ground into his face.
1842
01:20:31,542 --> 01:20:34,212
The punk and his buds bolted.
1843
01:20:35,113 --> 01:20:36,981
The punk went away to college
and moved
1844
01:20:36,981 --> 01:20:39,484
as far from Chicago as he
could.
1845
01:20:45,823 --> 01:20:49,360
Eventually, the punk
1846
01:20:50,394 --> 01:20:51,996
became me.
1847
01:20:54,665 --> 01:20:57,568
The memory of that bleeding
boy, it consumed,
1848
01:20:58,736 --> 01:21:01,305
consumes--
1849
01:21:04,776 --> 01:21:05,276
I see
1850
01:21:05,276 --> 01:21:08,246
on the street, a face, a scar.
1851
01:21:09,080 --> 01:21:12,350
I mean, I know what I did, but
1852
01:21:12,350 --> 01:21:15,887
I'll never really know--
1853
01:21:18,956 --> 01:21:19,257
This,
1854
01:21:19,524 --> 01:21:21,159
this is truth?
1855
01:21:21,559 --> 01:21:22,727
I'm sorry.
1856
01:21:24,395 --> 01:21:25,663
I'm sorry.
1857
01:21:25,663 --> 01:21:27,365
You are amazing.
1858
01:21:28,599 --> 01:21:30,935
Who you once were, a
self-hating redneck,
1859
01:21:30,935 --> 01:21:32,036
and who you are now--
1860
01:21:32,036 --> 01:21:33,971
Super Fag.
1861
01:21:36,507 --> 01:21:39,744
People really can change.
1862
01:21:42,747 --> 01:21:43,581
Okay.
1863
01:21:46,450 --> 01:21:47,251
Truth--
1864
01:21:49,720 --> 01:21:51,222
I was safe,
1865
01:21:52,123 --> 01:21:53,124
with her.
1866
01:21:55,860 --> 01:21:57,562
It was a her.
1867
01:22:24,288 --> 01:22:26,624
I'm aware of the complexity
1868
01:22:26,624 --> 01:22:28,326
of this issue.
1869
01:22:31,863 --> 01:22:34,799
I did not realize that
1870
01:22:37,368 --> 01:22:39,537
that it would come to this.
1871
01:22:39,837 --> 01:22:44,675
I take responsibility for how
my emotional reactions
1872
01:22:44,675 --> 01:22:48,579
affected this scenario.
1873
01:22:49,380 --> 01:22:50,514
I haven't seen Jonathan,
1874
01:22:50,514 --> 01:22:51,649
I mean, I haven't seen
1875
01:22:51,649 --> 01:22:52,917
Dr. Baldwin
1876
01:22:56,787 --> 01:22:58,289
since ummm,
1877
01:23:04,962 --> 01:23:06,731
Dr. Baldwin and I are not
1878
01:23:07,198 --> 01:23:09,000
together, anymore.
1879
01:23:25,016 --> 01:23:26,817
[door buzzer]
1880
01:23:35,359 --> 01:23:37,662
If you haven't noticed
from your watch,
1881
01:23:37,662 --> 01:23:40,031
you may notice from my
attire--this is a thoroughly
1882
01:23:40,031 --> 01:23:41,999
inappropriate time for you
to be here.
1883
01:23:43,034 --> 01:23:44,769
I was walking by.
1884
01:23:44,769 --> 01:23:46,737
At ten p.m.?
1885
01:23:48,406 --> 01:23:49,740
Please.
1886
01:23:59,317 --> 01:23:59,850
Last night,
1887
01:23:59,850 --> 01:24:01,852
I went to a bar.
1888
01:24:01,852 --> 01:24:04,355
You know, a regular bar,
to study men.
1889
01:24:06,991 --> 01:24:09,093
And I met a woman there,
blond,
1890
01:24:09,627 --> 01:24:10,661
curves in all the places
1891
01:24:10,661 --> 01:24:13,564
I'd want curves, if I liked
curves.
1892
01:24:13,764 --> 01:24:15,566
I'm trying to figure out why
I didn't care
1893
01:24:15,566 --> 01:24:17,368
she was beautiful.
1894
01:24:17,969 --> 01:24:20,371
She catches my stare,
1895
01:24:20,371 --> 01:24:23,441
thinks I want her. Flirts.
1896
01:24:23,441 --> 01:24:27,278
You know, sparkly eyes, head
thrown back, a deep throaty
1897
01:24:27,278 --> 01:24:31,082
laugh. She helps me forget who
I am and invites me home.
1898
01:24:31,082 --> 01:24:31,916
I go.
1899
01:24:32,416 --> 01:24:34,552
Then, the pre-sex dance.
Men, women,
1900
01:24:34,552 --> 01:24:37,488
it's all the same. You know,
1901
01:24:39,824 --> 01:24:41,759
the heart's pounding.
1902
01:24:41,759 --> 01:24:46,130
It's me. And it. Out. In
working order.
1903
01:24:46,597 --> 01:24:47,865
I stick it in,
1904
01:24:48,432 --> 01:24:49,600
I do it.
1905
01:24:50,901 --> 01:24:52,770
And it was off.
1906
01:24:53,170 --> 01:24:55,506
The smells, the taste were
all off.
1907
01:24:55,506 --> 01:24:56,574
How could
1908
01:24:56,574 --> 01:24:59,377
such an ill-considered attempt
end in anything but failure?
1909
01:24:59,977 --> 01:25:01,912
Which you knew beforehand.
1910
01:25:03,314 --> 01:25:04,248
Tea?
1911
01:25:08,119 --> 01:25:09,887
So, this escapade
puzzles me.
1912
01:25:10,621 --> 01:25:14,325
I want to believe your mission
to destroy me is terminated.
1913
01:25:14,325 --> 01:25:15,793
But I'm aware
1914
01:25:15,793 --> 01:25:18,129
of the possibility that you
may still be hoodwinking me.
1915
01:25:18,863 --> 01:25:21,365
And quite frankly, this turn
of events
1916
01:25:21,365 --> 01:25:24,001
makes me doubt your sincerity.
1917
01:25:24,001 --> 01:25:26,270
So, it's my turn to demand
proof.
1918
01:25:26,937 --> 01:25:29,140
Proof? What? That I? With
a woman?
1919
01:25:29,173 --> 01:25:31,242
No. A different kind of proof.
1920
01:25:31,909 --> 01:25:34,278
I'm filing a complaint against
you Dr. Baldwin with
1921
01:25:34,278 --> 01:25:36,580
the Psychology Licensing
Board.
1922
01:25:36,580 --> 01:25:37,348
What?
1923
01:25:37,748 --> 01:25:39,750
What he's done--going after
me--is wrong.
1924
01:25:41,052 --> 01:25:42,153
Please no.
1925
01:25:42,153 --> 01:25:43,721
And you'll be
expected to testify.
1926
01:25:44,388 --> 01:25:45,890
I won't turn on Jonathan.
1927
01:25:45,890 --> 01:25:47,958
I'm not asking you to. Merely
tell the truth.
1928
01:25:47,958 --> 01:25:49,627
The truth is the same as
turning on him.
1929
01:25:49,627 --> 01:25:50,995
If there's one thing you've
learned from me,
1930
01:25:50,995 --> 01:25:51,829
isn't it not to lie?
1931
01:25:51,829 --> 01:25:52,596
Yes.
1932
01:25:52,596 --> 01:25:53,898
And if the Board
talks to you, will you?
1933
01:25:55,166 --> 01:25:56,767
Please, don't do this.
1934
01:25:56,767 --> 01:25:57,802
I'll do anything.
1935
01:25:57,802 --> 01:25:58,502
Just ask.
1936
01:25:58,502 --> 01:26:00,638
But don't hurt Jonathan.
1937
01:26:00,638 --> 01:26:02,306
An acquaintance of mine at
the Board
1938
01:26:02,306 --> 01:26:03,974
told me your Dr. Baldwin
1939
01:26:03,974 --> 01:26:06,243
inquired about filing a
complaint against me.
1940
01:26:07,344 --> 01:26:09,346
I'm filing a counter complaint
because
1941
01:26:09,346 --> 01:26:11,082
at the risk of sounding
like a five-year-old--
1942
01:26:11,082 --> 01:26:12,316
he started it.
1943
01:26:12,883 --> 01:26:14,418
If you're able to dissuade
1944
01:26:14,418 --> 01:26:15,419
your Dr. Baldwin,
1945
01:26:15,419 --> 01:26:17,555
I'd be less inclined to file
a complaint of my own.
1946
01:26:17,755 --> 01:26:18,989
I'll stop him.
1947
01:26:19,990 --> 01:26:22,093
I imagine you overestimate
your influence on
1948
01:26:22,093 --> 01:26:24,128
Dr. Baldwin. But, I'll wait
one week
1949
01:26:24,128 --> 01:26:26,897
to provide you with the
opportunity.
1950
01:26:26,897 --> 01:26:30,101
Now. Your misguided sexual
attempt.
1951
01:26:30,101 --> 01:26:31,268
What was that all about?
1952
01:26:31,268 --> 01:26:32,403
I don't know.
1953
01:26:32,403 --> 01:26:34,171
You don't know. Of course not.
1954
01:26:34,171 --> 01:26:36,073
Shall we construct
some possibilities?
1955
01:26:36,073 --> 01:26:38,709
Perhaps as research for a
new article?
1956
01:26:39,110 --> 01:26:40,978
A rousing first person
narrative on how
1957
01:26:40,978 --> 01:26:43,013
it was to sleep with a
woman in, oh,
1958
01:26:43,013 --> 01:26:43,948
how many years?
1959
01:26:44,315 --> 01:26:45,282
Lots of them.
1960
01:26:45,282 --> 01:26:47,218
Any reality to this first
hypothesis?
1961
01:26:47,351 --> 01:26:47,885
No.
1962
01:26:47,885 --> 01:26:49,420
Then hypothesis number two--
1963
01:26:51,088 --> 01:26:53,991
this woman found so
irresistible,
1964
01:26:53,991 --> 01:26:56,260
she began shoving hundred-
dollar-bills down your shorts.
1965
01:26:56,260 --> 01:26:57,761
It wasn't that kind of bar.
1966
01:26:57,761 --> 01:26:58,429
Well, let me suggest
1967
01:26:58,429 --> 01:27:00,631
a particularly farfetched
hypothesis.
1968
01:27:00,631 --> 01:27:02,700
Perhaps,
1969
01:27:02,700 --> 01:27:05,769
you slept with a woman
because, gee, gosh,
1970
01:27:06,837 --> 01:27:08,405
you wanted to.
1971
01:27:10,474 --> 01:27:14,011
Ah, no response.
1972
01:27:14,612 --> 01:27:16,447
I'm not sure.
1973
01:27:16,447 --> 01:27:18,182
How could you be?
1974
01:27:19,950 --> 01:27:23,721
Clarity is unobtainable as
long as you live with
1975
01:27:23,721 --> 01:27:24,688
Dr. Baldwin.
1976
01:27:26,290 --> 01:27:27,491
I love him.
1977
01:27:27,491 --> 01:27:31,729
So? The great romantic myth is
1978
01:27:31,729 --> 01:27:33,497
that love is the highest
calling.
1979
01:27:33,497 --> 01:27:35,232
It's not.
1980
01:27:35,566 --> 01:27:38,035
I once had a client who
justified sex
1981
01:27:38,202 --> 01:27:41,105
with his dog, because he
loved the creature.
1982
01:27:42,139 --> 01:27:43,707
His dog!
1983
01:27:44,942 --> 01:27:48,312
Love is no excuse for
poor choices.
1984
01:27:48,946 --> 01:27:49,813
The Dr. Baldwin
1985
01:27:49,813 --> 01:27:51,982
you love, set you up.
1986
01:27:52,349 --> 01:27:55,953
He used you for his own
vendetta.
1987
01:27:56,353 --> 01:27:58,989
Why didn't he come to
see me himself?
1988
01:27:58,989 --> 01:28:00,891
Because he didn't want to
risk anything.
1989
01:28:08,599 --> 01:28:10,234
I like you,
1990
01:28:11,535 --> 01:28:14,838
but you've been one
dumb dupe.
1991
01:28:15,272 --> 01:28:16,774
His pawn.
1992
01:28:18,008 --> 01:28:20,945
He's not a man to trust.
1993
01:28:21,679 --> 01:28:23,247
Your life has no room in it
1994
01:28:23,247 --> 01:28:24,682
for a manipulator like
1995
01:28:24,682 --> 01:28:25,783
Dr. Baldwin.
1996
01:28:29,119 --> 01:28:30,387
Clear enough?
1997
01:28:33,791 --> 01:28:35,192
I guess.
1998
01:28:38,562 --> 01:28:39,630
Good man.
1999
01:28:41,465 --> 01:28:43,434
Now, be firm.
2000
01:28:44,168 --> 01:28:45,002
In control.
2001
01:28:45,002 --> 01:28:47,271
Your Dr Baldwin will employ
all his tricks
2002
01:28:47,271 --> 01:28:50,107
to demolish this decision.
2003
01:28:51,208 --> 01:28:52,710
Understandably.
2004
01:28:52,710 --> 01:28:53,911
He's got a lot to lose.
2005
01:28:56,480 --> 01:28:57,181
You.
2006
01:29:32,816 --> 01:29:33,684
Morning.
2007
01:29:35,819 --> 01:29:36,487
Hey.
2008
01:29:40,591 --> 01:29:41,892
Out all night?
2009
01:29:44,228 --> 01:29:45,829
Been thinking.
2010
01:29:47,631 --> 01:29:48,966
Uh-huh?
2011
01:29:51,402 --> 01:29:53,837
I'm thinking maybe it's
time to,
2012
01:29:58,008 --> 01:30:00,044
it's time to,
2013
01:30:06,817 --> 01:30:08,252
to end.
2014
01:30:09,486 --> 01:30:11,588
Us.
2015
01:30:15,192 --> 01:30:16,527
More research?
2016
01:30:19,029 --> 01:30:21,465
You have the divorce
experience, and presto,
2017
01:30:21,465 --> 01:30:23,867
more material for the article
that never was?
2018
01:30:24,134 --> 01:30:26,370
I don't appreciate your
attitude.
2019
01:30:27,771 --> 01:30:29,873
If I'm ever going to figure
out what life
2020
01:30:29,873 --> 01:30:31,442
I want, I need
2021
01:30:31,942 --> 01:30:34,044
to leave.
2022
01:30:34,211 --> 01:30:35,379
I need...
2023
01:30:37,281 --> 01:30:38,415
Out.
2024
01:30:45,856 --> 01:30:46,990
I will let you go--
2025
01:30:46,990 --> 01:30:48,592
no fight--
2026
01:30:49,326 --> 01:30:51,195
if you swear, you'll never go
back.
2027
01:30:51,195 --> 01:30:53,464
I can't. I won't promise that.
2028
01:30:53,464 --> 01:30:54,665
I won't let you go back.
2029
01:30:56,233 --> 01:30:57,401
What, you’ll tie me up?
2030
01:30:57,401 --> 01:30:58,569
Hire a twenty-four-hour
guard?
2031
01:30:58,569 --> 01:30:59,770
Whatever it takes.
2032
01:30:59,770 --> 01:31:01,839
Frank, heal. Frank, sit.
Frank, stay.
2033
01:31:01,839 --> 01:31:02,840
Frank write this article.
2034
01:31:02,840 --> 01:31:06,377
No, I won't live with your
demands. With your,
2035
01:31:06,377 --> 01:31:08,645
your lies. With your
manipulations. With you.
2036
01:31:10,481 --> 01:31:11,382
I lied once.
2037
01:31:12,616 --> 01:31:15,085
The bashing. That's the only
time I ever lied to you.
2038
01:31:15,252 --> 01:31:17,788
Behind my back. A complaint
against Apsey.
2039
01:31:17,788 --> 01:31:19,690
If that's not a lie, what is?
2040
01:31:19,690 --> 01:31:21,425
Yeah, I know. And he
knows, too.
2041
01:31:21,425 --> 01:31:22,393
And he's gonna file a counter-
2042
01:31:22,393 --> 01:31:23,827
complaint if you go through
with it.
2043
01:31:23,827 --> 01:31:25,929
How can trust you anymore?
2044
01:31:25,929 --> 01:31:27,197
It's a lie here, and a lie
there.
2045
01:31:27,197 --> 01:31:29,133
And they build and build and
build. All of a sudden there's
2046
01:31:29,133 --> 01:31:31,902
this swamp of lies just
smothering our relationship.
2047
01:31:32,202 --> 01:31:34,471
A dark, dank, sludge that
we're waddling through,
2048
01:31:34,471 --> 01:31:35,973
and I'm sick of the stink,
2049
01:31:35,973 --> 01:31:37,107
and I'm sick of you.
2050
01:31:37,107 --> 01:31:38,442
And I. Want. Out!
2051
01:31:48,385 --> 01:31:49,286
I don't,
2052
01:31:49,753 --> 01:31:51,221
I don’t mean this very moment.
2053
01:31:55,492 --> 01:31:56,493
That's mine.
2054
01:31:56,493 --> 01:31:57,027
Yeah.
2055
01:31:58,128 --> 01:31:59,830
You're packing for me?
2056
01:31:59,830 --> 01:32:00,564
Us.
2057
01:32:01,031 --> 01:32:02,466
Us?
2058
01:32:02,466 --> 01:32:03,367
Bermuda.
2059
01:32:03,634 --> 01:32:05,669
You always wanted to go,
right?
2060
01:32:05,702 --> 01:32:07,638
Jonathan!
2061
01:32:08,439 --> 01:32:09,273
Yeah, yeah.
2062
01:32:10,007 --> 01:32:10,474
Fuck!
2063
01:32:10,641 --> 01:32:11,408
Fuck!
2064
01:32:13,610 --> 01:32:14,812
How many times have I told
clients
2065
01:32:14,812 --> 01:32:16,046
you can't change another
person?
2066
01:32:16,046 --> 01:32:18,282
Let go. And, yet, I can't.
2067
01:32:19,516 --> 01:32:21,518
I'm getting you away from
that monster.
2068
01:32:22,186 --> 01:32:24,087
We thought you'd pull
something like this.
2069
01:32:25,022 --> 01:32:26,056
We?
2070
01:32:31,028 --> 01:32:31,995
Where you going?
2071
01:32:32,796 --> 01:32:34,965
To Frankenstein's castle.
2072
01:32:35,766 --> 01:32:38,802
For a heart-to-heart.
Or a fist-to-fist.
2073
01:32:38,802 --> 01:32:40,971
I'll decide which on the way.
2074
01:32:53,750 --> 01:32:54,284
Just, just,
2075
01:32:54,451 --> 01:32:55,886
just let me talk to him.
2076
01:32:55,886 --> 01:32:56,420
Relax.
2077
01:32:57,855 --> 01:33:00,190
Ah, the unannounced visit
brigade's multiplying.
2078
01:33:00,190 --> 01:33:02,125
Dr. Baldwin, I presume.
Welcome.
2079
01:33:02,125 --> 01:33:03,393
I’m sorry, I tried to stop him.
2080
01:33:03,393 --> 01:33:04,294
It's quite alright. The
pleasure is--
2081
01:33:04,294 --> 01:33:07,898
Nobody's. This war is between
you and me.
2082
01:33:07,898 --> 01:33:08,432
Jonathan--
2083
01:33:08,432 --> 01:33:09,132
Leave Frank out of it.
2084
01:33:09,132 --> 01:33:09,733
Don’t do this.
2085
01:33:09,733 --> 01:33:11,134
Shut up Frank.
I'm doing this for you.
2086
01:33:11,134 --> 01:33:12,436
Shut up? You treat me like
a child.
2087
01:33:12,436 --> 01:33:13,237
Then act like an adult.
2088
01:33:13,237 --> 01:33:14,304
I am.
2089
01:33:14,304 --> 01:33:14,905
I don't think so.
2090
01:33:14,905 --> 01:33:16,540
You, you, you act like an adult.
2091
01:33:16,540 --> 01:33:17,207
I, I, I am.
2092
01:33:17,207 --> 01:33:18,008
Gentleman--
2093
01:33:18,008 --> 01:33:18,775
Oh, like that was adult?
2094
01:33:19,309 --> 01:33:20,110
Gentleman.
2095
01:33:20,444 --> 01:33:22,079
I don't do couples therapy.
2096
01:33:22,079 --> 01:33:23,847
Now, Dr. Baldwin,
2097
01:33:23,847 --> 01:33:25,249
I'm pleased you're here.
2098
01:33:26,216 --> 01:33:28,118
This game of yours has gone
on long enough.
2099
01:33:28,118 --> 01:33:29,987
This is a game to you?
2100
01:33:29,987 --> 01:33:31,188
This isn't any game--
2101
01:33:31,188 --> 01:33:31,855
And your pawn,
2102
01:33:31,855 --> 01:33:34,024
Mr. Johnston, is suffering.
2103
01:33:34,024 --> 01:33:35,993
I am not a pawn.
2104
01:33:35,993 --> 01:33:37,261
He's not my pawn.
2105
01:33:37,261 --> 01:33:38,428
You don't need to talk for me.
2106
01:33:38,428 --> 01:33:39,596
Then tell him.
2107
01:33:39,596 --> 01:33:40,797
Listen, I am not,
2108
01:33:40,797 --> 01:33:42,132
I was his pawn,
2109
01:33:42,132 --> 01:33:42,900
Frank.
2110
01:33:43,867 --> 01:33:45,435
But you don't have to call
me one.
2111
01:33:45,435 --> 01:33:47,404
How dare you call Frank
a pawn?
2112
01:33:47,404 --> 01:33:48,405
Don't defend me.
2113
01:33:48,405 --> 01:33:49,439
Well, apparently, you need it.
2114
01:33:49,439 --> 01:33:50,173
No, I don't need you to.
2115
01:33:50,173 --> 01:33:51,275
No, I don’t--
2116
01:33:51,275 --> 01:33:51,842
I'm sorry to say you do--
2117
01:33:51,842 --> 01:33:52,776
No, I don’t--
2118
01:33:53,343 --> 01:33:55,312
Can we stop this infantile
doo-doo?
2119
01:33:56,680 --> 01:33:57,714
Heavens, you two together
2120
01:33:57,714 --> 01:33:58,782
are a nightmare.
2121
01:33:59,383 --> 01:34:00,684
Can we get a collective grip?
2122
01:34:00,684 --> 01:34:02,386
Keep your sucking, strangling
2123
01:34:02,386 --> 01:34:03,620
tentacles off of Frank.
2124
01:34:04,121 --> 01:34:07,024
Because if not, every ounce
of pain that you inflict
2125
01:34:07,024 --> 01:34:09,593
upon the man I love, I will
turn back on you tenfold.
2126
01:34:09,593 --> 01:34:11,862
Until you're withered
and broken
2127
01:34:11,862 --> 01:34:13,230
and too weak to
fight back.
2128
01:34:13,230 --> 01:34:16,266
Blah, blah, blah, blah.
2129
01:34:16,266 --> 01:34:19,202
I’m sorry, I have no patience
with such dedicated hate.
2130
01:34:19,202 --> 01:34:21,038
Hate is not a family value.
2131
01:34:21,038 --> 01:34:22,272
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
2132
01:34:22,272 --> 01:34:24,942
Hypocrisy for twenty! Take a
look in the mirror.
2133
01:34:24,942 --> 01:34:27,744
A mirror? One of us is
reported, both of us are.
2134
01:34:29,613 --> 01:34:32,115
There's no victory in
sacrificing one another.
2135
01:34:32,115 --> 01:34:33,150
A truce?
2136
01:34:33,150 --> 01:34:33,951
No complaints.
2137
01:34:38,655 --> 01:34:39,723
No complaints.
2138
01:34:39,723 --> 01:34:40,390
If--
2139
01:34:41,391 --> 01:34:43,327
If you agree never to see
Frank again.
2140
01:34:43,460 --> 01:34:44,027
Agreed.
2141
01:34:45,228 --> 01:34:45,829
If--
2142
01:34:46,363 --> 01:34:48,832
You never again steal
from me another client.
2143
01:34:48,832 --> 01:34:50,968
Abso-fucking-lutely not!
2144
01:34:51,568 --> 01:34:52,803
What's more important to you?
2145
01:34:53,971 --> 01:34:54,905
Your Mr. Johnston?
2146
01:34:54,905 --> 01:34:57,007
Your clients?
2147
01:34:57,007 --> 01:34:59,276
Your license? You're
stopping me?
2148
01:34:59,843 --> 01:35:02,079
You can't have them all.
Prioritize.
2149
01:35:04,348 --> 01:35:05,749
You are pure evil.
2150
01:35:05,749 --> 01:35:07,784
I am pure nothing.
2151
01:35:07,784 --> 01:35:08,952
And neither are you.
2152
01:35:11,288 --> 01:35:12,055
Deal.
2153
01:35:12,055 --> 01:35:12,823
In truth,
2154
01:35:14,658 --> 01:35:16,426
To keep Mr. Johnston,
2155
01:35:16,426 --> 01:35:18,862
you'd condemn dozens of men
to my therapy,
2156
01:35:18,862 --> 01:35:20,030
which you believe evil?
2157
01:35:20,030 --> 01:35:21,698
Do we have a deal, or not?
2158
01:35:22,132 --> 01:35:23,300
No. My offer was a bluff.
2159
01:35:23,300 --> 01:35:24,801
I didn't think you'd accept.
2160
01:35:24,801 --> 01:35:26,436
You may be willing to
sacrifice dozens
2161
01:35:26,436 --> 01:35:27,371
of other men to save
2162
01:35:27,371 --> 01:35:29,840
Mr. Johnston, but I won't
sacrifice Mr. Johnston
2163
01:35:29,840 --> 01:35:30,641
to save myself.
2164
01:35:30,641 --> 01:35:32,876
The only deal I'll agree to--
2165
01:35:32,876 --> 01:35:35,178
no complaints, no conditions.
2166
01:35:37,147 --> 01:35:39,716
See you on the unemployment
line.
2167
01:35:39,716 --> 01:35:41,885
Believe it or not, Dr. Baldwin,
I respect you.
2168
01:35:42,319 --> 01:35:43,086
Fuck you.
2169
01:35:43,086 --> 01:35:44,554
Well, parts of you.
2170
01:35:45,022 --> 01:35:46,757
The part that dreams of a
perfect world
2171
01:35:46,757 --> 01:35:49,493
where everybody is happy
and well-adjusted.
2172
01:35:49,493 --> 01:35:50,694
That'd be lovely.
2173
01:35:51,028 --> 01:35:53,630
But in some men's perfect
world,
2174
01:35:53,630 --> 01:35:56,299
they wouldn't be okay with
their same-sex desires.
2175
01:35:56,299 --> 01:35:57,601
They simply wouldn't have any.
2176
01:35:57,601 --> 01:35:58,669
Do you have a son?
2177
01:35:59,302 --> 01:36:00,170
Dr. Baldwin,
2178
01:36:00,170 --> 01:36:02,005
you've chosen to fight to
change the world.
2179
01:36:02,005 --> 01:36:04,508
A nephew?
A friend or neighbor's boy?
2180
01:36:04,508 --> 01:36:05,242
Bang your head against
the wall.
2181
01:36:05,242 --> 01:36:06,743
But others don't want to fight.
2182
01:36:06,743 --> 01:36:07,978
Somewhere, there is someone,
in your life--
2183
01:36:07,978 --> 01:36:09,146
Others want to change
themselves--
2184
01:36:09,146 --> 01:36:10,480
That you are destroying--
2185
01:36:10,480 --> 01:36:12,182
Let others make their own
choices--
2186
01:36:12,182 --> 01:36:13,216
Don't do that to him.
2187
01:36:13,216 --> 01:36:14,051
Step aside.
2188
01:36:14,051 --> 01:36:15,018
Yeah. Step aside.
2189
01:36:15,018 --> 01:36:17,354
Hellooo! Remember me?
2190
01:36:21,425 --> 01:36:23,493
This was about me, wasn't it?
2191
01:36:25,996 --> 01:36:27,030
If this is about me,
2192
01:36:27,030 --> 01:36:29,399
why are neither of the two
voices I hear mine?
2193
01:36:33,637 --> 01:36:36,173
It's like the two of you are
on opposite shores,
2194
01:36:36,173 --> 01:36:38,442
I'm drowning, and you're
yelling, "This way,"
2195
01:36:38,442 --> 01:36:40,010
"No, this way," "Grab my
life preserver,"
2196
01:36:40,010 --> 01:36:41,278
"No, climb on my boat,"
2197
01:36:41,278 --> 01:36:42,946
"I'll save you," "No, I'll
save you,"
2198
01:36:42,946 --> 01:36:45,582
Screaming so loudly, I hadn't
even noticed it’s,
2199
01:36:45,582 --> 01:36:49,219
it's the two of you,
pissing, shitting,
2200
01:36:49,219 --> 01:36:52,823
vomiting in the lake that
makes the water so high.
2201
01:36:55,225 --> 01:36:57,360
I don't need to be saved.
2202
01:36:58,328 --> 01:37:00,764
I need to be left alone.
2203
01:37:04,868 --> 01:37:05,702
Out.
2204
01:37:06,570 --> 01:37:07,471
Out.
2205
01:37:09,072 --> 01:37:10,974
Out. Out.
2206
01:37:12,809 --> 01:37:13,810
Out.
2207
01:37:16,880 --> 01:37:18,181
I wish I hadn't met
2208
01:37:18,181 --> 01:37:19,182
Dr. Apsey.
2209
01:37:20,817 --> 01:37:22,352
Because,
2210
01:37:23,253 --> 01:37:25,922
though he was very logical
sounding,
2211
01:37:26,923 --> 01:37:28,391
he confused me.
2212
01:37:29,092 --> 01:37:32,662
I think people don't want
to entertain a possibility--
2213
01:37:32,662 --> 01:37:34,564
His work is dangerous.
2214
01:37:34,564 --> 01:37:36,566
I believe that it's
homophobic--
2215
01:37:36,566 --> 01:37:40,303
They do not even want to think
that a certain possibility
2216
01:37:40,303 --> 01:37:43,140
is in the realm of
possibilities,
2217
01:37:43,140 --> 01:37:45,876
and anyone that might even
bring that up,
2218
01:37:47,010 --> 01:37:47,444
is an enemy--
2219
01:37:48,011 --> 01:37:48,945
If that
2220
01:37:48,945 --> 01:37:50,714
is a strike against me
as far as this
2221
01:37:50,714 --> 01:37:52,482
Board is concerned, then so
be it.
2222
01:37:52,482 --> 01:37:54,284
Why shrink possibilities?
2223
01:37:54,284 --> 01:37:56,753
My intent with the article
was not to discredit
2224
01:37:56,753 --> 01:37:59,623
Dr. Apsey. Have you read
the article?
2225
01:37:59,623 --> 01:38:02,959
I just present both sides.
2226
01:38:03,160 --> 01:38:05,295
Yes, I understand that this is
2227
01:38:05,295 --> 01:38:08,465
an ethics violation over which
I can lose my license.
2228
01:38:08,465 --> 01:38:11,301
As a psychologist I never set
about--
2229
01:38:12,836 --> 01:38:13,904
I think it would be a mistake--
2230
01:38:14,437 --> 01:38:15,372
To--
2231
01:38:16,072 --> 01:38:18,074
I think it would be a mistake
if I lost my license.
2232
01:38:18,074 --> 01:38:19,476
I don't think I've done
anything wrong.
2233
01:38:19,476 --> 01:38:20,243
--become embattled
2234
01:38:20,243 --> 01:38:22,112
with another professional.
2235
01:38:22,112 --> 01:38:24,347
My record will speak for
itself.
2236
01:38:24,347 --> 01:38:25,482
Dr. Apsey
2237
01:38:26,249 --> 01:38:28,118
doesn't need to,
2238
01:38:30,420 --> 01:38:31,721
he doesn't,
2239
01:38:32,088 --> 01:38:34,791
he doesn't need to--
2240
01:38:38,628 --> 01:38:40,330
Just be who you want to be.
2241
01:38:56,580 --> 01:38:57,814
Thank you for finally
seeing me.
2242
01:39:00,917 --> 01:39:02,853
I have a job interview at 2:15.
2243
01:39:02,853 --> 01:39:03,820
Talk.
2244
01:39:05,989 --> 01:39:07,624
I called because I want,
2245
01:39:10,994 --> 01:39:13,797
I want your recipe for
banana bread.
2246
01:39:14,130 --> 01:39:16,366
I wake up some mornings and
all I want is a slice of that
2247
01:39:16,366 --> 01:39:17,734
lousy bread.
2248
01:39:19,502 --> 01:39:20,670
Still games?
2249
01:39:20,670 --> 01:39:22,772
I'm trying to apologize.
2250
01:39:22,772 --> 01:39:23,607
Get on with it.
2251
01:39:23,607 --> 01:39:24,975
I'm sorry.
2252
01:39:28,011 --> 01:39:31,047
That's it? Two words?
2253
01:39:31,047 --> 01:39:33,183
After both you and Apsey filed
complaints, that became the
2254
01:39:33,183 --> 01:39:35,418
story. I couldn't write the
article without mentioning
2255
01:39:35,418 --> 01:39:38,288
you. I'm sorry you lost
your license.
2256
01:39:39,122 --> 01:39:40,991
But he's going to lose his too.
2257
01:39:44,861 --> 01:39:46,329
What do you do now?
2258
01:39:49,299 --> 01:39:50,400
Start over.
2259
01:39:53,403 --> 01:39:56,306
Being forced out of my
career, hey,
2260
01:39:56,873 --> 01:39:59,075
prevents a mid-life crisis.
2261
01:39:59,075 --> 01:40:00,877
That's the silver lining.
2262
01:40:02,746 --> 01:40:04,681
Some days that's all there is.
2263
01:40:10,820 --> 01:40:12,355
What you did was unforgivable.
2264
01:40:12,355 --> 01:40:14,124
Yes. Forgive me anyway.
2265
01:40:14,124 --> 01:40:15,325
You hurt me.
2266
01:40:15,325 --> 01:40:17,260
I know. You used me.
2267
01:40:19,963 --> 01:40:20,931
I know.
2268
01:40:21,631 --> 01:40:23,033
We shouldn't have.
2269
01:40:23,033 --> 01:40:23,533
We did.
2270
01:40:23,533 --> 01:40:24,567
Are we sorry?
2271
01:40:36,212 --> 01:40:38,949
You remember, maybe our
tenth date,
2272
01:40:38,949 --> 01:40:41,484
we strolled in this park,
by this fountain?
2273
01:40:41,484 --> 01:40:45,021
You stood behind me,
your arms wrapped around
2274
01:40:45,021 --> 01:40:48,024
my chest, your kneecaps
cradled at
2275
01:40:48,024 --> 01:40:49,826
the back of my knees.
2276
01:40:51,328 --> 01:40:53,430
You kissed my ear.
2277
01:40:54,197 --> 01:40:56,433
And I thought you were writing
true poetry.
2278
01:41:01,171 --> 01:41:03,173
The truth if it's anywhere in
me, it's in my body,
2279
01:41:03,173 --> 01:41:05,442
and my body knows--it's been
designed to love men.
2280
01:41:05,442 --> 01:41:07,644
One overly ripe banana.
Mush it--
2281
01:41:07,644 --> 01:41:09,779
I know we can't go back,
but we can go forward.
2282
01:41:09,779 --> 01:41:10,447
A future--
2283
01:41:10,447 --> 01:41:11,948
Three cups self-rising flour--
2284
01:41:11,948 --> 01:41:13,717
Us, no lies, no manipulations.
2285
01:41:13,717 --> 01:41:15,485
--Self-rising or it chews
like lead.
2286
01:41:15,485 --> 01:41:16,586
We're capable of that,
aren't we?
2287
01:41:16,586 --> 01:41:17,787
Sometimes I forget the
self-rising--
2288
01:41:17,787 --> 01:41:19,222
Listen to me. I'm trying
to say--
2289
01:41:19,222 --> 01:41:21,825
I know what you're trying
to say.
2290
01:41:22,392 --> 01:41:23,426
Stop it.
2291
01:41:24,227 --> 01:41:25,462
Don't say it. Please.
2292
01:41:28,431 --> 01:41:30,433
I'm not ready to stop
hating you.
2293
01:41:31,267 --> 01:41:32,335
Yet.
2294
01:41:33,737 --> 01:41:34,804
Yet?
2295
01:41:38,775 --> 01:41:40,477
I like that, “yet.”
158154
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