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1
00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:09,759
Mmm.
What do have we here?
2
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:13,096
Ooh, a fresh construction site.
3
00:00:13,179 --> 00:00:15,140
Time to give these lunch box Charlies
4
00:00:15,223 --> 00:00:18,143
something to look at while
they're drinking their RC Colas
5
00:00:18,226 --> 00:00:20,061
and eating their moon pies.
6
00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:21,646
It's go time.
7
00:00:21,771 --> 00:00:24,441
Violate me with your words, boys.
8
00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:28,278
Oh, man, that reminds me.
9
00:00:28,361 --> 00:00:31,281
I got to call my mama this weekend.
10
00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:33,408
Maybe they didn't see me.
11
00:00:33,491 --> 00:00:34,743
Let me give them another taste.
12
00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:41,666
Oh, I know what this is.
13
00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:43,460
They're afraid of a lawsuit.
14
00:00:43,543 --> 00:00:45,253
I give you my consent.
15
00:00:45,337 --> 00:00:47,756
Ooh, ooh, ooh, look at this cheerleader.
16
00:00:55,930 --> 00:00:59,601
Okay, find your own way down, then.
17
00:01:33,551 --> 00:01:35,303
Don't mind me.
18
00:01:35,387 --> 00:01:38,515
My once hypnotic buns
have lost their magic.
19
00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:40,892
-What now, Mother?
-Used to be construction workers
20
00:01:40,975 --> 00:01:42,560
couldn't take their eyes off me.
21
00:01:42,644 --> 00:01:45,355
I used to be the reason
nothing got built in this town.
22
00:01:45,438 --> 00:01:47,190
They were too distracted.
23
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:49,275
Aw, come on, Betty.
You look great.
24
00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:51,695
Don't give me your pity compliments.
25
00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:53,655
I know I've gained a few wisdom pounds.
26
00:01:53,738 --> 00:01:55,824
But does that make me invisible?
27
00:01:55,907 --> 00:01:57,909
Ugh, I need a drink.
28
00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:01,788
Stealing from a construction site
29
00:02:01,871 --> 00:02:03,707
and now you're gerbling wine?
30
00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:06,543
Brenda.
I shook my cans and my caboose
31
00:02:06,626 --> 00:02:09,212
in front of a girder
full of construction workers
32
00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:11,006
and got nothing.
33
00:02:11,089 --> 00:02:13,550
No catcalls, no wolf whistles.
34
00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:16,094
-No a-roogahs.
-No shake-its? No break-its?
35
00:02:16,177 --> 00:02:18,680
Not even one
"Took your mama that long to make it."
36
00:02:18,763 --> 00:02:20,682
Total silence.
37
00:02:22,308 --> 00:02:23,893
Well, it's all over.
38
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:25,854
May as well eat this full tray
of monkey bread
39
00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:28,440
and start the process
of fully letting myself go.
40
00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:32,277
No, no, no. Don't pull the pin
on that monkey bread grenade.
41
00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:35,196
You know what I do
when I'm needing a little body tune-up?
42
00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:37,198
I head to a Pound Pinchers meeting.
43
00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:38,533
Oh, come on, Brenda.
44
00:02:38,616 --> 00:02:41,036
I don't want to sit in a circle
of fat losers
45
00:02:41,119 --> 00:02:43,788
pining for a candy bar
like it's Jason Momoa.
46
00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:46,249
But don't you get it?
That's a real ego boost.
47
00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:47,792
Nothing makes you feel better
about yourself
48
00:02:47,876 --> 00:02:50,879
than sitting amongst a gaggle
of chunky desperados.
49
00:02:50,962 --> 00:02:54,090
Oh, yeah. I guess I would look
like Claudia Swiffers
50
00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:55,717
compared to those uggos.
51
00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:58,345
But I am gonna hide
this monkey bread from my family
52
00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:01,598
just in case this whole plan is a bust.
Oof.
53
00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:06,061
Doo, doo-doo-doo.
54
00:03:06,144 --> 00:03:07,562
Hola, Jenny.
55
00:03:07,645 --> 00:03:10,231
How was your vacation, Louise?
56
00:03:10,315 --> 00:03:13,860
Well, Daniel had to come back early
for a businessman thing.
57
00:03:13,943 --> 00:03:15,779
But it wasn't sad at all, Jenny.
58
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:19,491
I liked being alone in Mexico
on my tenth anniversary.
59
00:03:19,574 --> 00:03:21,326
Anyways, Jenny,
60
00:03:21,409 --> 00:03:23,828
you know what I noticed
when I was driving myself home
61
00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:25,997
from the airport late last night?
62
00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:29,250
The Waffle House had a ton of customers,
63
00:03:29,334 --> 00:03:31,503
and we had no customers.
64
00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:33,338
Maybe 'cause we were closed?
65
00:03:33,421 --> 00:03:36,966
That's right, y'all.
Look at you, smarty.
66
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,802
So starting next week, The Last Supper's
67
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:41,513
gonna be open all night.
68
00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:43,890
-As in 24 hours?
-Yeah, silly.
69
00:03:43,973 --> 00:03:46,434
And you get to be our new night manager.
70
00:03:46,518 --> 00:03:47,852
-Doo, doo-doo-doo.
71
00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:50,563
For the same money. Doo-doo.
72
00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,899
These meetings are a "what, what" factory.
73
00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:54,567
Compliments for days.
74
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:57,946
Look at you in those jeans.
75
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:04,577
Wow-ee, looks like
Mary is down another five pounds.
76
00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:06,538
Go on, show us that hot bod.
77
00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:09,332
Leader lady. Ooh, over here.
78
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,376
-We're ready to strut.
-Oh, right.
79
00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:13,670
We have some newcomers.
80
00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:15,755
-Oh, hello.
-Hi.
81
00:04:18,842 --> 00:04:20,760
Okay. Welcome, ladies.
82
00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:23,471
Come on up and step on the scale.
83
00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:24,848
Why don't we just skip the scale
84
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,267
and get to the complimentary
hoots and hollers?
85
00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,060
Oh, you'll get lots of compliments
86
00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:30,812
when you start getting down
to your healthier weight.
87
00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,772
Huh?
88
00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:35,316
Now why don't you get some steps in
89
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:36,693
on the way to the scale?
90
00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:39,529
Oh I'm gonna get my steps in, later,
91
00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:42,866
when I'm doing the Riverdance
on your face.
92
00:04:46,202 --> 00:04:49,080
It's just such a bad idea.
The Last Supper open late?
93
00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:51,791
You guys are already pushing the limits
94
00:04:51,875 --> 00:04:54,961
on how long you can keep a piece
of flounder under a heat lamp.
95
00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:57,213
Right?
That's why I told Louise "Hell no."
96
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:58,631
I mean, the words
were more along the lines
97
00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:01,092
of "Sure, I'll think about it,"
but there was definitely
98
00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:03,553
-a real "hell no" vibe to it.
Good.
99
00:05:03,636 --> 00:05:06,181
I mean, the night shift
is no place for a lady---
100
00:05:06,264 --> 00:05:07,724
Uh-oh...
101
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:09,684
Uh...
102
00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:12,729
Wait, what did you just say?
103
00:05:12,812 --> 00:05:14,439
I'm capturing the look--
the look of a man
104
00:05:14,522 --> 00:05:16,941
seconds before he loses everything.
105
00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:18,735
I'm just saying, women are a little more
106
00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:20,904
physically vulnerable than men.
107
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,822
Look, Wayne, it's you.
And that poo pile
108
00:05:22,906 --> 00:05:24,908
is all your words and thoughts.
109
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:27,118
You think ladies can't be night managers?
110
00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:28,703
Okay, that is not what I said.
111
00:05:28,787 --> 00:05:30,497
I'm just saying the freaks
come out at night.
112
00:05:30,580 --> 00:05:32,874
Ha, ha, just like that song by Whodini.
113
00:05:32,957 --> 00:05:34,125
Mm. Amazing pivot.
114
00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:35,377
But it's what you meant.
115
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:37,462
And for the record, I can handle it.
116
00:05:37,545 --> 00:05:39,005
My Lord, you're stubborn.
117
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:41,508
When? When have I ever
been stubborn? When?
118
00:05:43,218 --> 00:05:46,054
Jenny, your check engine light
means check the engine.
119
00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:47,305
I know when my check engine light
120
00:05:47,389 --> 00:05:48,556
is serious and when it isn't.
121
00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:49,891
Jenny, don't be stubborn.
122
00:05:49,974 --> 00:05:51,976
We're not gonna make it to Charlotte.
123
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:53,895
I don't even see that.
124
00:05:53,978 --> 00:05:56,690
-Guess who made it to Charlotte?
125
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,525
This bitch.
126
00:05:58,608 --> 00:06:00,985
Oh, I just want to give him one grape.
127
00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:02,904
-Lions don't even eat grapes.
128
00:06:02,987 --> 00:06:05,573
Guess who proved lions like grapes?
129
00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:07,617
This bitch...
Ouch!
130
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,285
Oh, my God, what did she do?
131
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,621
I reminded her she that she is
allergic to cauliflower,
132
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:14,708
so she ate a tray of roasted cauliflower.
133
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,878
Guess who just saw God?
134
00:06:18,962 --> 00:06:20,755
This bitch.
135
00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:24,384
Jenny, you have a history
of putting your life in danger
136
00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:26,553
-just to be right.
-No, I don't.
137
00:06:26,636 --> 00:06:28,513
And guess who's taking
the night manager job.
138
00:06:28,596 --> 00:06:31,433
"This bitch"?
-This bitch.
139
00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:40,233
Aw, you two.
I'm so glad you came back.
140
00:06:40,316 --> 00:06:42,736
The second meeting
is the most important one.
141
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:45,155
Now let's hop on that scale.
Come on.
142
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:46,865
-Hey, Leigh-Ann,
143
00:06:46,948 --> 00:06:48,074
could you just give my friend Betty here
144
00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:49,325
a couple of golf claps?
145
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:50,952
She just needs a little bit of kudos.
146
00:06:51,036 --> 00:06:53,997
-You know, just a kude?
-Please?
147
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,665
Well, hop on that scale,
148
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:57,876
and let's see if those numbers
are kude-worthy.
149
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,505
Wow, okay.
Looks like we're up three pounds,
150
00:07:02,589 --> 00:07:06,134
which is a lot for one day.
151
00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:09,679
Leigh-Ann, I went home
last meeting with zero claps,
152
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:13,350
zero back pats and zero "You go, girls."
153
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:16,061
You basically pushed me
right into the comforting arms
154
00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:18,396
of a kiddie pool-size tray of monkey bread
155
00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:20,482
and a rain barrel of full-fat eggnog.
156
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:22,984
-That's not safe.
-Not even Christmas.
157
00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,402
All right, on to better news.
158
00:07:24,486 --> 00:07:27,655
Danica just lost her 15th pound.
159
00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:30,408
Big bravo moment, y'all.
160
00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:32,327
-Big whoop.
-This blows.
161
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:34,037
15.3.
162
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,581
And I put my pre-baby khakis
back on, y'all.
163
00:07:36,664 --> 00:07:40,043
-Okay, okay. Bravo, I-I guess.
164
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:42,337
But let's talk about those pants.
165
00:07:42,420 --> 00:07:44,714
Honey, those khakis are far too thick
166
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,132
to get a decent camel toe going.
167
00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:50,387
Yeah, Danica.
Why are you so excited
168
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,681
about squeezing into a UPS uniform?
169
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:55,558
Men should be delivering
you their package.
170
00:07:57,894 --> 00:07:59,813
Y'all are so right.
171
00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:04,651
Oh, do me, do me.
172
00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:06,861
Things never once heard in Larry's bedroom
173
00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:08,488
for 500, Alex.
174
00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,576
Okay. O-Okay, everybody.
175
00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:16,413
Let's calm down.
Who hasn't weighed in yet?
176
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:18,415
Weigh in?
I'm looking for a way out.
177
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:19,916
Just like Larry's husband.
178
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,751
-It's true.
179
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:24,087
It's true.
I mean, we're in therapy.
180
00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:26,047
Screw dropping pounds.
181
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:29,551
Losing weight will never
feel as good as this.
182
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:34,723
Oh, Wayne, look at me.
183
00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:36,933
I'm a girl, and I'm running
this restaurant at night.
184
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,768
I'm so scared...
185
00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:41,271
-Aah!
-Aah! Jesus, you snuck up on me.
186
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,606
Are you wearing a moisturizing sheet mask?
187
00:08:43,732 --> 00:08:44,941
Well, you don't keep this baby face
188
00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:47,152
for 2,000 years without a little help.
189
00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:50,822
So, night manager, huh?
You sure you can handle it?
190
00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:52,824
Why does everyone keep saying that?
191
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:54,826
Because night people are a little scary.
192
00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:56,828
Remember that song by Whodini?
193
00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,663
♪ The freaks come out at night ♪
194
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:00,915
♪ The freaks
come out at night... ♪
195
00:09:00,999 --> 00:09:02,500
I can handle the night freaks.
196
00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:04,377
Plus, don't forget Benny's in the back.
197
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,629
♪ Oh, Lord ♪
198
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,048
♪ All this self-hating... ♪
199
00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:10,675
Benny. Benny.
200
00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:11,885
He's working.
201
00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:15,889
Okay, well, night hours begin right now.
202
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:22,729
24 hours, my babies.
203
00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:24,689
Now I can basically live here.
204
00:09:24,773 --> 00:09:26,691
Oh, no, Randy, absolutely not.
No, no, no.
205
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,151
You got to be a paying customer.
206
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:31,571
I'll have one hushpuppy please.
207
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:33,198
And now that I'm a paying customer,
208
00:09:33,281 --> 00:09:34,991
night, night, everybody.
209
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:39,079
And I should warn you now,
I am a sleep screamer.
210
00:09:39,162 --> 00:09:42,374
Meaning, I have to scream myself to sleep.
211
00:09:47,379 --> 00:09:49,547
Sir?
Uh, we don't allow dogs here.
212
00:09:49,631 --> 00:09:51,800
-Perfect. This is a wolf.
213
00:09:51,883 --> 00:09:54,052
Excuse me, sir?
214
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:55,428
You can't come in here without a shirt.
215
00:09:55,512 --> 00:09:56,721
But can I at least do the drugs
216
00:09:56,805 --> 00:09:58,223
I stole from CVS?
217
00:09:58,306 --> 00:10:00,809
No. You got to put a shirt on,
or you are out of here.
218
00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:02,477
♪ You couldn't
find a good freak anywhere... ♪
219
00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,270
Boom, say hello to my shirt.
220
00:10:06,147 --> 00:10:09,275
Sir, sir, you cannot drive
your baby motorcycle in here.
221
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,277
It's street legal!
222
00:10:11,361 --> 00:10:14,698
This is not a street.
This is the inside of a restaurant.
223
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,157
Watch this.
224
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:19,786
Oh, my God, what have I done?
225
00:10:21,079 --> 00:10:23,707
We got us a howl going, babies.
226
00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:31,339
♪ The freaks come out at night ♪
227
00:10:31,423 --> 00:10:34,718
♪ The freaks come out
at night. ♪
228
00:10:34,801 --> 00:10:36,428
Morning. Made you some breakfast.
229
00:10:36,511 --> 00:10:38,304
-Aah!
-Oh, God!
-Mom!
230
00:10:38,388 --> 00:10:39,806
I'm sorry, Wayne.
231
00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:42,100
Sorry, Vi. Hi.
232
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,310
A little on edge from last night?
233
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:45,729
Me? No way.
234
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:46,980
So stubborn.
235
00:10:47,105 --> 00:10:49,399
I'm not stubborn or on edge.
I'm amped.
236
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,234
Amped up from how much calm fun I had
237
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:52,819
with all my new chill friends.
238
00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:55,113
So it was fun and chill?
239
00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:56,781
Oh, yeah.
Well, the night crowd is actually
240
00:10:56,865 --> 00:10:58,533
really sophisticated and cool.
241
00:10:58,616 --> 00:11:01,369
Lot of book clubs.
People come out of art house movies
242
00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:03,455
and having philosophical discussions.
243
00:11:03,538 --> 00:11:05,582
Wow, The Last Supper at night
244
00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:08,084
is like being transported to 1920s Paris.
245
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:10,503
And why do you have a bunch
of Band-Aids on your arm?
246
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:13,757
Oh, that? Oh, I just
got caught in a little crossfire
247
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:15,342
between two rapscallions
248
00:11:15,425 --> 00:11:18,720
named Mista Apocalypse and Eddie Toilet.
249
00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:20,221
Two nighttime regulars,
250
00:11:20,305 --> 00:11:22,766
just having a friendly little oil fight.
251
00:11:22,849 --> 00:11:25,643
Kind of like a fancy duel.
It's like Hamilton, really.
252
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:28,646
Eddie Toilet's oil fight
was like Hamilton?
253
00:11:28,730 --> 00:11:30,482
Uh... uh-huh.
254
00:11:30,565 --> 00:11:32,484
do you think a wolf
could bite through this?
255
00:11:35,487 --> 00:11:37,238
There he is.
256
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:40,075
Well rested 'cause we know
he wasn't getting busy last night.
257
00:11:40,158 --> 00:11:42,410
Good one, Betty.
258
00:11:42,494 --> 00:11:45,330
Oh.
Where are those khakis, girl?
259
00:11:45,413 --> 00:11:47,832
I hope they're hanging
on some trucker's bedpost.
260
00:11:47,916 --> 00:11:50,210
How'd you know?
261
00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,922
Can I have a word with you two?
262
00:11:54,005 --> 00:11:56,091
This meeting is not about your comedy,
263
00:11:56,174 --> 00:11:58,093
it's about losing weight.
264
00:11:58,176 --> 00:12:00,095
So could you please just cool it?
265
00:12:00,178 --> 00:12:03,098
-It's really distracting.
Betty? Brenda?
266
00:12:03,181 --> 00:12:04,933
We got your stage all set up.
267
00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:06,309
Well, sorry, Leigh-Ann,
268
00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:07,894
we got to give the people what they want.
269
00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:13,441
-There's my girl, Chica Seat.
270
00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:16,152
Why is she called Chica Seat?
271
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:19,197
‘Cause when she sits, it's a cheek a seat.
272
00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:28,873
I don't think I can wait until
the next Pound Pinchers meeting
273
00:12:28,957 --> 00:12:30,750
to get another chuckle fix.
274
00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:32,627
A whole week? Uh-uh.
275
00:12:32,711 --> 00:12:35,380
I'm gonna need me
some giggles before then.
276
00:12:40,218 --> 00:12:43,430
Time to take this show on the road.
277
00:12:45,807 --> 00:12:48,643
Y'all ever notice how sober
people walk like this?
278
00:12:48,727 --> 00:12:51,021
"Bartender, I'll have a glass of boring
279
00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:53,273
-on the rocks."
280
00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:55,483
And drunk people
are all walking like this.
281
00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:57,152
After-party's at my house.
282
00:12:57,235 --> 00:13:00,280
Give me my car keys. I'm fine.
283
00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:05,201
Attention, original cast of Cocoon,
284
00:13:05,285 --> 00:13:08,163
it's time for some bingo.
285
00:13:08,246 --> 00:13:11,499
B4, as in I hope somebody wins
286
00:13:11,583 --> 00:13:14,377
before this old biddy kicks the bucket.
287
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:19,758
-Did she just die?
288
00:13:19,841 --> 00:13:21,718
Bingo!
289
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:24,179
-We killed.
-Literally.
290
00:13:31,269 --> 00:13:33,063
Hey, man, what are you doing here?
291
00:13:33,188 --> 00:13:36,107
Uh, nothing.
I-I'm just spying on a waitress.
292
00:13:36,191 --> 00:13:39,486
Me, too.
-Get out of here, freak.
293
00:13:46,868 --> 00:13:49,037
Oh, my Lord, that girl needs my help
294
00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:50,747
whether she wants it or not.
295
00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:57,295
Okay. Fingernail Guy needs
more salt for his pentagram.
296
00:13:57,379 --> 00:13:59,673
Distraught Woman Wearing Pajamas
wants another order
297
00:13:59,756 --> 00:14:01,716
of her kidnapped son's favorite pancakes.
298
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:03,551
-Mayo Guy wants more mayo.
299
00:14:03,635 --> 00:14:05,220
Classic Mayo Guy.
300
00:14:05,303 --> 00:14:08,515
And Randy is probably
due for another scream in three, two...
301
00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:11,309
I'm lucid dreaming, baby.
302
00:14:11,393 --> 00:14:14,813
And it's sexual in nature.
303
00:14:17,565 --> 00:14:19,192
Oh, hi, didn't see you come in.
304
00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:20,735
Uh, yeah, I'm just looking
305
00:14:20,819 --> 00:14:22,320
to get a chicken sandwich.
306
00:14:22,404 --> 00:14:24,030
Or maybe a hot dog or street pretzel.
307
00:14:24,114 --> 00:14:25,824
Oh!
308
00:14:25,907 --> 00:14:29,202
This is a fish restaurant.
And what's your name, sir?
309
00:14:29,285 --> 00:14:32,080
Uh, Dwayne... I'm Walking Here.
310
00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:37,127
Your name is "Dwayne I'm Walking Here"?
311
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,962
Damn it, Wayne.
I can handle this.
312
00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:41,548
Stop trying to be right, Jenny.
You clearly need help.
313
00:14:41,631 --> 00:14:43,675
Did you pierce your ear for this disguise?
314
00:14:43,758 --> 00:14:44,884
No.
315
00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:46,261
Oh, God, The pain.
316
00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:47,762
I don't need your help.
317
00:14:47,846 --> 00:14:49,973
Please let me kick out that guy
318
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,809
who I'm pretty sure is O.J. Simpson.
319
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:55,228
What are you talking about?
These are my people.
320
00:14:55,311 --> 00:14:58,231
Hey, Eddie Toilet,
let me get a ride on that thing.
321
00:14:58,314 --> 00:15:00,567
-Okay, maybe later.
322
00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:04,237
Now if you'll excuse me,
323
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:06,364
I have a very friendly-looking
customer to attend to.
324
00:15:06,448 --> 00:15:07,782
Table for one?
325
00:15:07,866 --> 00:15:09,284
Oh, I'm not gonna need a table.
326
00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:12,579
I'm just gonna need all your money.
327
00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:21,087
Okay, lady, this is a holdup.
328
00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:22,589
Oh. Shh, shh. Shh, shh, shh.
329
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:25,967
Wait. You're shushing a person
pointing a gun at you?
330
00:15:26,051 --> 00:15:27,802
Okay, all right,
I'm gonna get you that money,
331
00:15:27,886 --> 00:15:29,387
but let me tell you what's going on here.
332
00:15:29,471 --> 00:15:30,972
That man over there is my boyfriend,
333
00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:32,515
and he thought this was gonna be dangerous
334
00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:34,017
for me to take this night job.
335
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:35,769
And I was like, "What?! No, it's not."
336
00:15:35,852 --> 00:15:37,479
So if he finds out you're robbing me,
337
00:15:37,562 --> 00:15:38,980
I'm gonna be on the business end
338
00:15:39,064 --> 00:15:40,940
of a major "I told you so" situation.
339
00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:42,984
Oh, I hear that.
My old man told me
340
00:15:43,068 --> 00:15:44,736
I was never gonna be able to do a stick-up
341
00:15:44,819 --> 00:15:46,363
on my own, and here I am.
342
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,448
And where is he?
In the burn unit,
343
00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:51,242
getting skin grafts 'cause I poured a pot
344
00:15:51,326 --> 00:15:53,536
of hot grits on his head. Boom.
345
00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:56,039
Okay, so you... get it.
346
00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:58,792
All right, I'll play along,
347
00:15:58,875 --> 00:16:01,086
but one wrong move, and you're worm food.
348
00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:03,463
Actually, Worm Food
is the one standing over there
349
00:16:03,546 --> 00:16:05,131
-with Mista Apocalypse.
350
00:16:05,215 --> 00:16:08,009
Hi! But, yeah, uh, point taken.
351
00:16:08,093 --> 00:16:10,053
♪ The freaks come out at night ♪
352
00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:12,472
-♪ The freaks come out
at night ♪
353
00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:15,392
♪ Discos don't open till after dark ♪
354
00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:18,019
♪ And it ain't till 12:00
till the party really starts ♪
355
00:16:18,103 --> 00:16:20,605
♪ And I always had to be home by 10:00 ♪
356
00:16:20,689 --> 00:16:22,524
♪ Right before the fun
was about to begin ♪
357
00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:25,026
♪ Crowds of people lined up
inside and out ♪
358
00:16:25,110 --> 00:16:26,986
♪ Just one reason-- to rock the house ♪
359
00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:29,280
♪ The freaks come out at night ♪
360
00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:31,408
♪ The freaks
come out at night. ♪
361
00:16:33,368 --> 00:16:34,577
How y'all doing?
362
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:37,122
Good! How y'all doing?
363
00:16:37,205 --> 00:16:38,665
Well, I'll tell ya, honey.
364
00:16:38,748 --> 00:16:40,500
I'm hot, delicious, and I can get there
365
00:16:40,583 --> 00:16:42,043
in 30 minutes or less.
366
00:16:44,838 --> 00:16:47,507
Brenda Pizza,
I finally perfected my theory
367
00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:49,092
of snack-a-tivity.
368
00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:50,969
Oh, what's that, Dr. Pastarelli?
369
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:53,013
E equals me see pizza!
370
00:16:53,096 --> 00:16:56,141
-See you next time.
371
00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:58,226
Hey-oh!
372
00:16:58,309 --> 00:17:01,021
Ladies, I never want to see you again.
373
00:17:01,104 --> 00:17:03,356
And I've spoken to the City of Greenpoint,
374
00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,192
and you are banned from
every meeting in this building.
375
00:17:06,276 --> 00:17:07,944
-What?
-Why?
376
00:17:08,028 --> 00:17:10,780
These are self-help meetings,
not comedy clubs.
377
00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:12,449
And frankly, your jokes are better
378
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:14,701
when they were a little more off-the-cuff.
379
00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:17,996
-Excuse me?
-Your act is all over the place.
380
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:20,415
you're a giant piece of pizza,
381
00:17:20,498 --> 00:17:22,625
and you're dressed like Albert Einstein,
382
00:17:22,709 --> 00:17:25,378
but you're calling yourself
Dr. Pastarelli?
383
00:17:25,462 --> 00:17:28,715
You-you've got too many ideas
going on here.
384
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:31,509
-I told you!
-Just, please, get out.
385
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,472
Here are your fish and chips
386
00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:38,641
with a side of collard greens.
387
00:17:42,771 --> 00:17:45,690
Psst! Mr. Toilet, she's got a gun.
388
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,527
Oh, snap.
-You gather the others,
389
00:17:49,611 --> 00:17:51,654
and on three, we'll bum-rush her.
390
00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:53,365
Toilet's on it.
391
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,825
-One, two...
392
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:58,036
Everybody on the Toilet!
393
00:17:59,871 --> 00:18:01,664
-No!
394
00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:03,124
I'm tired of this game.
395
00:18:03,208 --> 00:18:05,043
This is a robbery!
396
00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:06,544
Okay, yes, it is, but it's not a big deal
397
00:18:06,628 --> 00:18:08,380
'cause I am handling it!
398
00:18:08,463 --> 00:18:11,466
Whatever it is, I'm gonna need
what's in your wallets.
399
00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:12,967
And those earrings, too.
400
00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:15,178
Were you seriously
trying to hide a robbery
401
00:18:15,261 --> 00:18:17,222
just to avoid being wrong?
402
00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:19,057
I just wanted to keep you safe!
403
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:20,725
Oh, big male savior.
404
00:18:20,809 --> 00:18:23,728
Ugh. He's one of those types.
Just like my ex.
405
00:18:23,812 --> 00:18:25,647
I'm serious, Beverly.
He is nonstop.
406
00:18:25,730 --> 00:18:27,148
These are so cute.
407
00:18:27,232 --> 00:18:29,192
-Where'd you get these?
-Guess.
408
00:18:29,275 --> 00:18:31,444
-Don't bond with her! She's robbing you!
-I'll bond
409
00:18:31,528 --> 00:18:33,655
with whoever I want to.
Costco.
410
00:18:33,738 --> 00:18:36,908
Shut the fudge.
They got jewelry now?
411
00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:39,703
I'm gonna have to rob them next.
I'll steal something for ya.
412
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:41,287
Oh, Bev, that is so sweet.
413
00:18:41,371 --> 00:18:43,039
Jenny, stop bonding with her.
414
00:18:43,123 --> 00:18:45,125
It's what got us into this mess.
415
00:18:45,208 --> 00:18:47,460
Well, it's about
to get a whole lot messier.
416
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:50,880
-Grab the gun!
417
00:18:50,964 --> 00:18:52,465
Hang on, Randy.
418
00:18:52,549 --> 00:18:55,051
I don't want to be accused
of "man-saving."
419
00:18:55,135 --> 00:18:57,345
Jenny, maybe you should pick up the gun.
420
00:18:57,429 --> 00:18:59,139
With these girl arms?
421
00:18:59,222 --> 00:19:01,391
Jenny, just admit that I was right
422
00:19:01,474 --> 00:19:03,435
about this job being dangerous.
423
00:19:03,518 --> 00:19:05,770
Not until you admit
you backseat-drive me all the time.
424
00:19:05,854 --> 00:19:07,188
Why are you so stubborn?!
425
00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:09,149
Well, maybe I get
stubborn because it sucks
426
00:19:09,232 --> 00:19:10,984
when your own boyfriend
keeps cutting you down
427
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:12,902
and telling you you can't handle yourself.
428
00:19:12,986 --> 00:19:17,157
Jenny... I never thought
you couldn't handle yourself!
429
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:21,202
It's that I couldn't handle it
if anything happened to you.
430
00:19:23,204 --> 00:19:24,789
Ow!
431
00:19:24,873 --> 00:19:27,083
Well, damn it, Wayne, guess who loves you.
432
00:19:27,167 --> 00:19:29,335
This bitch.
433
00:19:31,296 --> 00:19:33,465
-Sounds like a real breakthrough,
434
00:19:33,548 --> 00:19:35,216
but Randy's cramping up.
435
00:19:35,300 --> 00:19:38,094
And if anyone
were to walk in on this with no context,
436
00:19:38,178 --> 00:19:40,513
Randy would look like the bad guy here.
437
00:19:40,597 --> 00:19:42,265
Aah! Look out!
438
00:19:42,349 --> 00:19:43,767
The mother opossum is getting the gun!
439
00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:45,602
-Oh, God. No, no, no, no.
440
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,771
-Don't shoot. Don't shoot.
-Hey, dummies, everybody,
441
00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:49,731
can it.
442
00:19:49,814 --> 00:19:52,150
Okay, everything in my gut
is telling me to kill all y'all.
443
00:19:52,275 --> 00:19:53,610
Just paint the walls!
444
00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:55,528
Do something so gross
445
00:19:55,612 --> 00:19:58,031
that they make a true crime podcast
about me.
446
00:19:58,114 --> 00:19:59,783
But Jenny,
447
00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:02,994
I like you, so I'm just gonna
take my money and get out.
448
00:20:03,078 --> 00:20:04,704
And I want you to have these back.
449
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:08,708
No, you keep one, and I keep one.
450
00:20:08,792 --> 00:20:11,795
Aw, friendship earrings!
451
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:14,130
What the hell is happening?
452
00:20:14,214 --> 00:20:16,758
Now put your snoots
on the floor and count to 50.
453
00:20:16,841 --> 00:20:19,344
Uh, uh, uh.
Not you, my little gumby monkey.
454
00:20:19,427 --> 00:20:21,596
You're coming with me.
455
00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:25,016
Looks like somebody
just got a place to sleep.
456
00:20:25,100 --> 00:20:27,977
Oh, sleeping's
not on the menu tonight, shug.
457
00:20:28,061 --> 00:20:30,563
Fear-sex it is, my babies.
458
00:20:40,073 --> 00:20:42,325
Mom, shouldn't
you be getting ready for work?
459
00:20:42,409 --> 00:20:44,452
Oh, Louise cancelled
the whole 24-hour thing
460
00:20:44,536 --> 00:20:46,913
after she found a dog bowl
of loose teeth on her desk.
461
00:20:46,996 --> 00:20:48,665
Dog teeth or human?
462
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:52,127
-Good question. It was a mix.
-I love that.
-Oh, gross!
463
00:20:52,210 --> 00:20:53,628
What happened with Pound Pinchers?
464
00:20:53,712 --> 00:20:55,422
Oh, we got kicked out
465
00:20:55,505 --> 00:20:57,465
for distracting chunk-a-doos
with too many tee-hees.
466
00:20:57,549 --> 00:21:00,051
Damn it, there has got
to be another place in this town
467
00:21:00,135 --> 00:21:02,512
where two women can flaunt the gifts
468
00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:05,640
that God gave them
to a desperate audience.
469
00:21:05,724 --> 00:21:07,559
Y'all look at this buffet.
470
00:21:07,642 --> 00:21:09,978
Mac and cheese, biscuits and gravy.
471
00:21:10,061 --> 00:21:11,730
Chicken fried steak?
472
00:21:11,813 --> 00:21:13,189
Heart attack row.
473
00:21:13,314 --> 00:21:15,734
Buffet now, defibu-later.
474
00:21:17,235 --> 00:21:19,195
Look at big-belly Bud over there.
475
00:21:19,279 --> 00:21:22,115
His belt buckle's over there going,
"I can't hold it!"
476
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,119
I don't know how they're getting
such a great reaction
477
00:21:26,202 --> 00:21:28,204
with their tops on, but I'll take it.
478
00:21:34,002 --> 00:21:35,920
479
00:21:36,004 --> 00:21:38,965
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