All language subtitles for reba_s03e16_the_shirt_off_my_back

Hey, remember when I said we could save
money for Kira's college fund by growing

our own food? Uh -huh. Well, crops are
in.

Well, that is amazing.

You spent months planting and weeding
and fertilizing, and next thing you

you've almost got a carrot.

Good morning, neighbors.

So, Kira, are you ready to hit the mall?
Yeah, but before we go, I need you to

sign this permission slip for a school
field trip. Sure.

This is to get your navel pierced.

Cool. I thought we were going to the
science center.

All right.

Man, I got to start reading those
things.

Okay, I'm going to go up and change,
then we'll go. Why don't you just wear

that?

My old gardening shirt?

Oh, shoot.

I've patched this thing a hundred times.

I only wear it to scare the crows away.

I never thought I'd say this, but what
you're wearing is actually cool.

Wait.

Are you saying I'm cool?

I'm saying your shirt is cool.

Kira's right.

Patrick is the new silk.

I want to be cool.

I wish I'd save my old rags and patch
them onto a shirt.

I'll give you $20 for that shirt.

Oh, don't be ridiculous, Barbara Jean.
I'm not going to sell you the shirt off

my back.

Okay, I get it.

$30. No way. $40. $60. $65. Sold. Yeah!

Bye. Bye.

Bye.

I bet you're in a good mood. I got you a
fudge -covered apple.

Wow.

This looks like an apology apple.

What'd you do?

Nothing.

Yet. Hey, you know how when we're going
somewhere and you get all mad because

you're waiting for me because I'm doing
my hair?

Well, those days are over.

Because all the guys in the football
team are shaving their heads.

Do you want to shave your head? If
that's what it takes to make you happy.

Forget it, Van. You know how I freaked
when you got that perm? Which... We

talk about the perm.

Look, it's for work. And if I don't do
it because my wife won't let me, all the

guys will make fun of me. This isn't
like high school taunting, okay? They're

pro football players. They're clever.

Mom, Van wants to shave his head.

For business purposes.

Why don't you practice by mowing the
lawn?

I absolutely forbid you to do this. End
of discussion.

But all the guys are doing it. I can't
be the only one with soft, wavy brown

hair.

Well, whatever you do, don't get another
one of those perms.

So, Reba, I got good news. What? Brock
came to his senses about quitting his

to play golf?

I have not come to my senses, Reba, and
I never will.

So, you remember that shirt that you
sold me? No refund.

No, I showed it to a friend who took it
to a guy that he works with, and he said

that he thinks he could sell those
shirts.

We're going to be rich. Sure, we're
going to be rich. And Brock's going to

Tiger Woods at the Fat Chance Desert
Classic.

Reba, I'm serious. We should do this.

You know, a lot of people make money
selling things they make. And a lot of

people lose money by selling things they
make. Yeah, but you don't hear about

those people.

Well, maybe you got a point.

Maybe you'll be one of the lucky ones.

So, um, you don't mind if I kind of take
this and run with it?

Hmm. Barbara Jean, you can run with this
idea. You can run with scissors.

You can run with the bad crowd, just so
long as you run.

Because everyone else is?

Gee.

It's okay to do something just because
everyone else is doing it?

Yeah.

To be cool.

Thanks.

Hey, Tiki, where are you going?

Graveyard.

Hi, honey.

You look really pretty.

I know, but you're still not shaving
your head. Why do we always have to

about stuff, huh?

I mean, I think the world would be a
better place if people with opposing

would just agree.

Oh, very mature. Listen, what I'm trying
to say is... Cut it out.

Ah,

the round table.

Kira, don't you think Bam would look
stupid if you shaved his head?

Yes, but are we going to list all the
ways that he would look stupid? Because

I've only got a few years until college.

Everybody's doing it to show unity, all
right?

To show we're all on the same team.

Oh, jeez.

If only there were a way to do that with
matching jerseys.

I can't talk to you.

Van, do you mind if I speak for you?

Yeah.

No.

I don't know. What?

Van's trying to say that playing on a
team involves complex group dynamics,

seemingly self -destructive acts are
actually initiation rites that foster

camaraderie. Did I just say that?

Look, I know it's dumb. So what? It was
dumb when my high school team dressed in

drag on game days. You didn't say
anything about that then.

Huh. That's the first time I heard those
were game days.

Look, this is important to me, okay?
Right now, I'm the new guy.

Rookie. I just want to feel like I
belong.

But I don't want you to do it. Why not?
Just because.

Well, that's not good enough. Well, it
used to be.

You don't even care what I think. You
just want me to agree with the decision

that you've already made.

Yes. Thank you for understanding.

You know what?

Do whatever you want. I don't care.

You are the prettiest on game days.

I thought so, too.

Good news, Reba.

I shot a two under par.

I hit a seven iron on 18 tap -in for
birdies. Oh, that's terrific, Brock.

Go in the kitchen and get yourself a
cookie.

Oh, good, Brock, you're here.

I have excellent news.

Can it top how Brock killed seven
birdies with his 18 wood?

Well, good job, honey.

And I bet you're going to be proud of
me, too.

So much he ordered a hundred of them to
sell in stores all over town.

This is just a deposit.

That's great, honey. Isn't that great,
Reba? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. And he said that this is
just the first order. He said that he

see all of Houston wearing these shirts.
And after that, all of Texas.

And after that, he didn't say.

But if he did, I bet he would have said
America.

Wow. This is just like me with golf.
Yeah.

Except I got a big fat check.

No, I meant you have a lot of potential.
Oh, I do.

And I have a big fat check.

Wow, this is something.

So that guy said that my shirts could
sell like that?

Well, you know, he didn't mention you,
but yes.

Wow, that's great.

So fork over my $150.

Why would I do that?

Because it's my shirt.

My design is the hip new thing.

Who knew?

Well, not you.

It wasn't so much your design he bought
as my salesmanship.

Oh, well, does he want a hundred of your
salesmanship or a hundred of my design?

You know, the way I see it, you guys did
this together.

We really did it.

I recognized the potential of the shirt,
and Reba didn't want any part of it.

She told me to run with it, and I did.

Me, not her.

Right, but it was my shirt.

Yeah, which I bought, which would make
it my shirt.

I bought a greeting card once. That
doesn't make me Hallmark.

Well, I bought a lollipop once.

Doesn't make me a sucker.

This is my idea, my business, my
company, and my money.

Your idea, my design.

Your business, my design. Do you get
where I'm going with this? Hey, hey,

hey, hey.

Why don't you guys just share?

Get her chance.

Oh, come on, Barbara Jean.

It was Reba's design.

It's only fair that she gets half.

Now, you remember what your mother
taught you.

Don't shape above the knee unless you're
expecting company.

No, the other thing.

fine, but if she gets half the money,
she does half the work.

Well, of course I will.

I've been looking for a way to get some
cash for Kears College Fund.

Apparently, I'll do anything.

Fine.

You win.

We'll work together, but I'll call the
shots.

If you hear any shots, they're coming
from me.

but if we do three shirts a night, we're
still ahead of schedule.

What's that?

The stink of mediocrity?

Okay, moving forward.

I have cut up a bunch of fabric for
patches, so why don't you make a

for us to work from?

What about the shirt I already made?

It was left with the buyer.

What?

Why would you do that?

Management made a decision. We're just
going to have to live with it.

Go back and get the shirt and we'll
start again tomorrow.

And lose a whole day?

Unacceptable!

We've got shirts, we've got patches, do
that thing you do!

If you don't lower your voice, I'm going
to do that thing I've always wanted to

do.

Reba, I knew you were going to ruin this
for me.

Ruin what?

Barbara Jean, quit being so testy.

I am not testy.

I am a serious businesswoman.

Gladden, this company can afford a
psychiatrist.

Hey, Cheyenne, what's doing?

Making a list of insulting names to call
Van when he gets back from shaving his

head. You know, I can't believe he's
doing that after I absolutely positively

told him not to.

Oh, my gosh.

This is the first husband who's ever had
a problem with a direct order.

Did you happen to tell him why you
didn't want him to do it?

No. Huh. We may be on to something.

Look, I can ask you what's wrong, and
eventually you'll tell me. Then I'll go

Van and tell him. Then he'll tell me his
side of the story, and I'll just get

you two to work it out. But you know
what?

I still got dinner to make, so go talk
to him. Yeah, but Van doesn't have a

side, Mom.

Of course he does. That's what marriage
is, finding out each other's side.

Go talk to him. All right, I get it.
It's just I... Go talk to him.

I just feel like I'm married.

You know, you can be very annoying
sometimes, Mother.

The kid has a point. Ah, shut up.

What's it going to be?

Shave it.

Bet you hear this a lot.

My old lady doesn't want me to do it.

But, I mean, it's my head.

It should be my decision.

I just hate when she's mad at me.

I don't know. I don't know.

What do you think?

Okay.

Okay, let's do it.

Could you give us a minute, please?

Sure.

I'll go see if that stripey thing is
turning.

What is it, Cheyenne?

I'm kind of in the middle of something
here.

Whoa.

That feels weird.

Do this and then do this.

I should, um, tell you why I didn't want
you to do this instead of just ordering

you around.

Well, I think that... Let me finish.

I didn't want you to do this because it
made me feel left out.

Oh, sure.

You want to shave your head, too?

I felt left out because, you know, you
have this job and it's taking up all

these areas of your life and now it's
taking your hair.

But this doesn't mean anything. This is
something I have to do for my job. It's

similar to how some people have to take
certain tests to get a job. Like when a

bartender has to pass the bar.

Look, it used to be just you and me.

Now you have this whole other life, and
I'm not even a part of it. Hey, I tried

to make you a part of it.

I mean, I came to you two times.

I mean, I wanted your support. I wanted
you to be here with me because I'm doing

this for you and Elizabeth.

I'm doing this for our future.

I mean, do you think I really want to
look like the mayor of Munchkinland?

Look, I'm sorry, Van. It's just...

This is the only van I've ever known.

Look, look.

If you don't want me to finish, I guess
I don't have to.

I mean, yeah.

I'm pretty sure we can afford a very
narrow toupee.

So what's it going to be?

Okay. Jake. Place in bed.

How's your head?

Are you sane yet?

No. I feel like a failure.

We failed.

I didn't fail. I ain't started yet.

Oh, Jean.

Calm down.

We got plenty of time.

No, we don't. We don't know how much
time we have.

Sure we do.

The shirts aren't due till next Friday.

Reba, open your eyes.

I'm not talking about the shirts.

about Brock.

He's selling the practice.

He wants to play pro golf.

I don't think he knows what he's doing.

Oh, honey.

Is that what you're worried about?

Of course he doesn't know what he's
doing.

He's making all these changes, Reba.

What if the next change he wants to make
is me?

Oh, that's not going to happen.

Well, you'll forgive me if I don't find
much comfort in the assurances of his ex

-wife.

If the worst does happen, Reba, I just
need to know that I can be something

other than Brock's wife.

But apparently, I can't.

I can't even be the crazy lady that
makes shirts.

Barbara Jean, he loves you.

Reba, he loved you, too.

The man's a pig.

and he finally agrees on something.

Barb Jean, look at me.

Look at me.

Look at me.

Brock isn't going anywhere.

He loves you. He's crazy about you.
Okay?

Thank you. You're welcome.

Let's see what you got going here.

Barb Jean, I gotta look at it sometime.

Bon.

have to remember why you did it, to be
like one of the guys.

Well, see, the other guys didn't do it.

What? Yeah, they tricked me.

They're mean. Hold me.

Oh, honey.

Jenny Garth, isn't it? It's an all -new
What I Like About You.