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1
00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,920
I took these lights down myself last
year, and I wound them up real neat.
2
00:00:07,420 --> 00:00:09,280
Now look at them. Why do they do this?
3
00:00:09,520 --> 00:00:10,740
Maybe it's their mating season.
4
00:00:16,340 --> 00:00:20,460
Now there's a guy who really lights up a
room. Oh, come on, lass. Cut it out.
5
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:22,380
I don't know, honey. You look very
festive.
6
00:00:22,660 --> 00:00:25,400
Yeah, I mean, you wear your golf pants
in public. What's the difference?
7
00:00:31,380 --> 00:00:32,920
Hi. Remember me?
8
00:00:36,140 --> 00:00:37,140
One of those happy guys.
9
00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:38,540
Helping others happily.
10
00:00:38,740 --> 00:00:39,740
That's our motto.
11
00:00:40,360 --> 00:00:42,340
Merry Christmas, Carl. Come on in.
12
00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:47,040
No, no, never mind. I'll come back later
when you're through trimming your
13
00:00:47,040 --> 00:00:49,000
husband. No, that's okay.
14
00:00:50,020 --> 00:00:55,460
Well, as you know, it's at this time of
year that we have the Happy Guys annual
15
00:00:55,460 --> 00:00:57,960
benefit for the Home for Not -So -Happy
Kids.
16
00:00:58,260 --> 00:00:59,179
Oh, sure.
17
00:00:59,180 --> 00:00:59,879
Here you go.
18
00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:00,920
No, that's all right, George.
19
00:01:01,140 --> 00:01:03,120
It's not your money we want. It's you.
20
00:01:03,420 --> 00:01:05,340
I'm out of here. Wait a minute, George.
21
00:01:06,030 --> 00:01:09,450
Carl, what is it exactly you want George
to do? Well, we were hoping you'd all
22
00:01:09,450 --> 00:01:13,010
participate in the Happy Guys' annual
Christmas pageant. This year we're doing
23
00:01:13,010 --> 00:01:14,350
Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol.
24
00:01:14,550 --> 00:01:15,408
Did you ever hear of it?
25
00:01:15,410 --> 00:01:16,410
Well, sure.
26
00:01:16,550 --> 00:01:18,170
That's the one with the Grinch, right?
27
00:01:19,550 --> 00:01:22,270
You know, the holidays are so hectic for
us.
28
00:01:23,510 --> 00:01:24,910
Fine. Fine.
29
00:01:26,170 --> 00:01:30,190
When I have to close down the home for
not -so -happy kids, I'll just tell all
30
00:01:30,190 --> 00:01:35,170
those hollow -eyed little waifs that the
Owens were too busy to help out.
31
00:01:40,780 --> 00:01:43,460
Be there for the auditions. Ah, gee,
thanks.
32
00:01:44,260 --> 00:01:47,280
But we still have to find somebody who
can play Scrooge.
33
00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:49,540
Wesley, you little snipe.
34
00:01:49,940 --> 00:01:53,720
I spent six weeks making miniature
fruitcakes.
35
00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:56,320
And you've used them as hockey pucks.
36
00:01:56,940 --> 00:01:58,720
Hey, lighten up. It's Christmas.
37
00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:02,040
There's no Christmas for nasty boys.
38
00:02:03,980 --> 00:02:06,080
I think we found our Scrooge.
39
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:24,540
on the china never matters boy who cares
when you drop kick the jacket
40
00:02:24,540 --> 00:02:30,880
as you came through the door no one's
there but sometimes when you get turned
41
00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:37,220
around and no one's there all hands look
out below
42
00:02:37,220 --> 00:02:43,960
there's a change in the status all gonna
need all the help that you
43
00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,180
can get
44
00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:52,320
According to our new arrival, life is
more than mere survival.
45
00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:55,860
We just might live the good life yet.
46
00:03:04,040 --> 00:03:09,520
And only on Christmas Day would I drink
a toast to
47
00:03:09,520 --> 00:03:13,960
such an odious, stingy, unfeeling myth.
48
00:03:23,820 --> 00:03:24,820
or what?
49
00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:27,620
Uh, I'll get back to you.
50
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:31,400
What do you mean you'll get back to me?
I'm your wife.
51
00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:35,320
Yeah, I know.
52
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:41,080
All right, uh, next audition, uh,
Marsha?
53
00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:00,200
Play Scrooge's fiancée.
54
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,480
But I only said two words.
55
00:04:02,900 --> 00:04:04,640
Yes, but you said them beautifully.
56
00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:07,100
You'll also play Scrooge's sister.
57
00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:08,440
Thank you.
58
00:04:09,420 --> 00:04:10,680
That was easy.
59
00:04:11,060 --> 00:04:15,940
All right, everybody, listen up. The
cast for A Christmas Carol is as
60
00:04:17,519 --> 00:04:19,079
Scrooge will be Lynn Belvedere.
61
00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:22,280
Bob Cratchit, Kevin Owens. Mrs.
62
00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:24,660
Cratchit, Heather Owens.
63
00:04:25,100 --> 00:04:27,300
Tiny Tim, Wesley Owens.
64
00:04:43,969 --> 00:04:45,290
And I,
65
00:04:48,370 --> 00:04:50,650
for one, am an unhappy gal.
66
00:04:50,850 --> 00:04:55,510
And if these gals aren't happy today, we
aren't going to be happy guys tonight.
67
00:04:58,510 --> 00:04:59,510
Your blessings.
68
00:05:05,750 --> 00:05:06,990
All right.
69
00:05:07,490 --> 00:05:08,490
Quiet, everyone.
70
00:05:09,150 --> 00:05:10,990
We'll take it from the nephew's
entrance.
71
00:05:12,230 --> 00:05:13,230
Oh, that's me.
72
00:05:16,690 --> 00:05:21,290
Merry Christmas, Uncle.
73
00:05:22,210 --> 00:05:23,210
Merry Christmas.
74
00:05:23,470 --> 00:05:26,170
What right have you to be merry? You're
poor enough.
75
00:05:26,670 --> 00:05:29,690
Well, but you're rich. What right have
you to be Morrissey?
76
00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:32,470
The word is not Morrissey.
77
00:05:32,690 --> 00:05:33,750
It is Maroose.
78
00:05:35,550 --> 00:05:36,550
Oh, yeah.
79
00:05:36,650 --> 00:05:37,890
All right, from the top.
80
00:05:38,490 --> 00:05:39,490
No,
81
00:05:40,870 --> 00:05:45,430
no, no, no, no. That's not your cue.
Can't you guys get anything right?
82
00:05:45,770 --> 00:05:48,690
Hey, we're happy guys. Not Fred Waring
and the Pennsylvanians.
83
00:05:50,190 --> 00:05:52,490
All right, we'll take it from my line
about the dinner.
84
00:05:54,010 --> 00:05:55,010
Please, Uncle.
85
00:05:56,140 --> 00:05:57,300
Dine with us tomorrow.
86
00:05:58,020 --> 00:06:00,380
I should see you in Hades first.
87
00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:02,600
Why cannot we be friends?
88
00:06:03,720 --> 00:06:10,420
Because... Because Tiny Tim is playing
stickball with his
89
00:06:10,420 --> 00:06:12,900
crutch. Wesley, this is appalling.
90
00:06:13,260 --> 00:06:16,520
Hey, on the playground, that would have
been a double.
91
00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:23,080
Let's go to scene four. Bob Cratchit
asking Scrooge for Christmas Day off.
92
00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:30,460
If you please, Mr. Scrooge. Tomorrow
being Christmas, I was hoping I might
93
00:06:30,460 --> 00:06:35,600
the day off. All right.
94
00:06:38,220 --> 00:06:40,040
We'll take it from Cratchit's line.
95
00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,060
If you please, Mr.
96
00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:44,520
Scrooge.
97
00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:48,400
Seeing that tomorrow is Christmas, I was
hoping I might have the day off.
98
00:06:58,380 --> 00:06:59,380
a ledger.
99
00:07:00,900 --> 00:07:01,940
Okay, here you are.
100
00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:03,520
Here you go.
101
00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:06,220
The Three Little Pigs.
102
00:07:06,860 --> 00:07:08,540
You expected to play Scrooge?
103
00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:10,380
Carrying the Three Little Pigs.
104
00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:15,240
Be
105
00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:22,620
gone,
106
00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:26,240
get out. Off with you, you miserable
curds.
107
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:28,020
Wait a minute, Mr. Belvedere.
108
00:07:28,350 --> 00:07:32,710
line isn't in the script neither is
anything else this isn't dickens it
109
00:07:32,710 --> 00:07:38,170
england and it certainly isn't theater
how can you call yourself a director
110
00:07:38,170 --> 00:07:42,790
if you think you can do any better why
don't you try i thought you'd never ask
111
00:08:00,200 --> 00:08:03,260
Mrs. Cratchit and all the small assorted
Cratchits.
112
00:08:04,080 --> 00:08:05,080
Stop.
113
00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:08,000
Carl, please, don't affect an English
accent.
114
00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:09,900
I was only trying to be authentic.
115
00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:11,920
Wouldn't you rather be good?
116
00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:14,900
Now, once again, please, and Bob
Cratchit's line.
117
00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:19,860
They're all fine, sir. We have high
hopes that Tiny Tim is feeling better
118
00:08:27,050 --> 00:08:28,710
Sorry, Mr. Big Time Director.
119
00:08:29,010 --> 00:08:31,370
Just trying to keep our worthless selves
occupied, sir.
120
00:08:32,030 --> 00:08:35,950
If you want to keep yourselves occupied,
I suggest you practice your singing.
121
00:08:36,590 --> 00:08:40,510
Oh, speaking of singing, I had an idea
for a little number that might make
122
00:08:40,510 --> 00:08:43,650
Scrooge's sister more interesting. Yes,
well, perhaps when it's your scene, but
123
00:08:43,650 --> 00:08:44,650
not just now.
124
00:08:44,970 --> 00:08:48,470
All right, then. Now, please, gentlemen,
remember, it is Christmas.
125
00:08:48,730 --> 00:08:49,730
It is England.
126
00:08:50,650 --> 00:08:51,810
And it is cold.
127
00:08:52,770 --> 00:08:53,770
I'm not cold.
128
00:08:57,420 --> 00:08:58,279
You too?
129
00:08:58,280 --> 00:08:59,440
I thought it was just me.
130
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:02,540
Now cut it out, you guys.
131
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:03,960
That was me.
132
00:10:15,560 --> 00:10:16,560
So go ahead.
133
00:10:46,790 --> 00:10:48,790
Well, yeah, but did he have to make his
wife Scrooge?
134
00:10:49,270 --> 00:10:51,430
Well, what's wrong with a woman playing
Scrooge?
135
00:10:51,930 --> 00:10:53,390
I have to play her fiancé.
136
00:10:55,550 --> 00:10:59,910
Oh, Mr. Belvedere, please, please come
back to the play. Yeah, it's going to be
137
00:10:59,910 --> 00:11:01,270
a disaster without you.
138
00:11:01,670 --> 00:11:04,870
Yeah, big guy, I mean, it wasn't all
that great with you, but at least you
139
00:11:04,870 --> 00:11:05,870
holding it together.
140
00:11:05,950 --> 00:11:07,230
Sorry, I have plans.
141
00:11:07,790 --> 00:11:10,670
I'm spending the evening with a witty
and very dear friend.
142
00:11:11,290 --> 00:11:12,290
Well, who's that?
143
00:11:12,510 --> 00:11:13,510
Me.
144
00:11:14,050 --> 00:11:16,050
Now, you better run along. You'll be
late for rehearsal.
145
00:11:16,540 --> 00:11:17,540
Yeah, we better go.
146
00:11:17,620 --> 00:11:19,920
I guess I'll have to find the inner
Cratchit myself.
147
00:11:21,500 --> 00:11:25,300
You know, you may have quit the play,
but you'll always be Scrooge.
148
00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:29,880
Good night.
149
00:11:41,080 --> 00:11:43,880
I need some rest.
150
00:12:31,470 --> 00:12:32,470
Big guy.
151
00:12:33,650 --> 00:12:37,370
Apparently it is too late to save me
from bad jokes.
152
00:12:38,370 --> 00:12:40,210
Now be on your way.
153
00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:47,630
Before the night is out, you will be
visited by three spirits.
154
00:13:29,590 --> 00:13:32,330
What are you talking about?
155
00:13:32,830 --> 00:13:33,970
Take my hand.
156
00:13:34,430 --> 00:13:37,250
Why? Will you just take my hand?
157
00:13:39,870 --> 00:13:40,890
Where are we going?
158
00:13:41,470 --> 00:13:45,110
I can't tell you, but there's still time
to save yourself.
159
00:13:45,470 --> 00:13:46,470
From what?
160
00:13:46,890 --> 00:13:48,010
Walk this way.
161
00:14:10,030 --> 00:14:11,210
recognize that child?
162
00:14:13,210 --> 00:14:14,510
Why, it's me.
163
00:14:15,930 --> 00:14:20,050
Master Belvedere, have you completed
your punishment?
164
00:14:20,650 --> 00:14:26,390
Yes, sir. I will not throw food at my
neighbor 964 times.
165
00:14:26,730 --> 00:14:28,230
What about the other 36?
166
00:14:28,910 --> 00:14:33,310
But it's Christmas Eve, sir. There is no
Christmas for nasty boys.
167
00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:45,720
Missing Christmas is a terrible thing.
168
00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:48,820
Cheerio and pip -pip, young people.
169
00:14:49,300 --> 00:14:50,320
Uncle Charles.
170
00:14:50,540 --> 00:14:51,279
Yes, child.
171
00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:54,920
I've come to take you home to sing
carols by the Yule log.
172
00:14:55,140 --> 00:14:57,180
Oh, wonderful. I do love Christmas so.
173
00:14:58,100 --> 00:14:59,300
But what's my punishment?
174
00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:02,000
We'll fax it.
175
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:05,080
Come along, my boy.
176
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:10,060
It's time for us to go, too.
177
00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:11,980
Did I want to go with them? No.
178
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:14,200
I'm afraid not.
179
00:15:14,820 --> 00:15:16,220
Oh, please, please.
180
00:15:49,070 --> 00:15:52,610
show you the real christmas present why
not
181
00:16:24,270 --> 00:16:25,270
to this wretched production.
182
00:16:25,790 --> 00:16:28,390
Well, gee, these folks don't seem too
wretched to me.
183
00:16:56,430 --> 00:17:01,170
Tiny Tim, if we only had a really
awesome Christmas dinner. I hear you,
184
00:17:01,670 --> 00:17:03,450
What are they doing?
185
00:17:03,870 --> 00:17:04,869
The play.
186
00:17:07,450 --> 00:17:08,869
Answer the door, Tiny Tim.
187
00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:44,700
Maybe if they had a better director.
188
00:17:45,260 --> 00:17:46,440
Don't look at me.
189
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:49,920
I won't. But your next visitor will.
190
00:17:52,740 --> 00:17:53,840
Oh, Heather!
191
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:55,500
Heather! Please!
192
00:17:55,740 --> 00:17:56,740
Heather!
193
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:08,520
Are you the ghost of
194
00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:10,100
Christmas yet to come?
195
00:19:00,530 --> 00:19:02,310
22 years ago.
196
00:19:03,530 --> 00:19:05,350
What about Mexico?
197
00:19:07,550 --> 00:19:09,850
Thanks for the lift home from college,
Wes.
198
00:19:10,110 --> 00:19:12,510
Sure. What are younger, more successful
brothers for?
199
00:19:13,710 --> 00:19:17,690
Hey, Dad, my counselor says I only need
one more credit to graduate.
200
00:19:33,610 --> 00:19:35,230
I just bought the moon from Donald
Trump.
201
00:19:35,650 --> 00:19:37,930
Why don't you take a flying leap at it?
202
00:19:40,250 --> 00:19:44,370
You know, you sound just like poor old
Mr.
203
00:19:45,170 --> 00:19:46,170
Belvedere.
204
00:19:46,610 --> 00:19:47,610
Am I?
205
00:19:49,150 --> 00:19:50,150
And I did.
206
00:19:51,910 --> 00:19:55,170
Worse. It's your 114th birthday.
207
00:20:41,520 --> 00:20:43,440
about the President of the United
States.
208
00:20:44,780 --> 00:20:46,520
This is monstrous.
209
00:20:47,020 --> 00:20:51,220
A hundred and fourteen years old and
still living with the Owens family.
210
00:20:51,740 --> 00:20:53,620
You have only yourself to blame.
211
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,000
What do you mean?
212
00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:58,220
I hate you all. I quit.
213
00:20:58,600 --> 00:21:00,960
Not so fast, old guy.
214
00:21:01,220 --> 00:21:02,820
You're forgetting something.
215
00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:05,000
You can't quit.
216
00:21:06,300 --> 00:21:08,440
Why, you're the most hated man in town.
217
00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:13,050
Remember when you left the happy guy's
place? 50 years ago. It turned out to be
218
00:21:13,050 --> 00:21:14,610
the worst mistake you ever made.
219
00:21:14,850 --> 00:21:19,490
That's right. The play bombed. The
people demanded their money back. The
220
00:21:19,490 --> 00:21:21,550
for not -so -happy kids had to close
down.
221
00:21:21,830 --> 00:21:25,230
They built a toxic waste dump on the
site. The whole town stinks.
222
00:21:25,730 --> 00:21:27,310
Property values went down.
223
00:21:27,570 --> 00:21:29,370
And everybody's poor.
224
00:21:29,710 --> 00:21:30,970
And it's all you.
225
00:21:45,070 --> 00:21:47,450
Mr. Belvedere, you'll always have us.
226
00:21:47,650 --> 00:21:48,650
Forever.
227
00:22:29,040 --> 00:22:31,040
Mr. Pizza's open for at least another
hour.
228
00:22:32,500 --> 00:22:34,900
The play! Have I missed the play?
229
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:36,880
The play's not for another week.
230
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:38,980
Oh, wonderful child.
231
00:22:39,660 --> 00:22:44,040
Marvelous family. I'm not too late. I'll
save the play. I don't have to live
232
00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:45,040
with you forever.
233
00:23:08,110 --> 00:23:09,110
We'll be right back.
234
00:23:10,230 --> 00:23:14,890
It is the night before Christmas, and
last night's Happy Guys production was a
235
00:23:14,890 --> 00:23:15,890
rousing success.
236
00:23:16,450 --> 00:23:21,690
The play raised an all -time high in
contributions for the home for not -so
237
00:23:21,690 --> 00:23:22,690
-happy kids.
238
00:23:23,370 --> 00:23:29,470
Further, it showed me that through the
true spirit of Christmas, almost
239
00:23:29,470 --> 00:23:30,470
is possible.
240
00:23:34,750 --> 00:23:40,050
Mike, if I came through here, Somebody
close the chimney.
241
00:23:41,590 --> 00:23:44,350
Make that everything is possible.
18129
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