All language subtitles for mr_belvedere_s04e18_the_apartment

Uh -oh.

I guess you found out what I did to the
school nurse.

Oh, nothing.

You were just crying at the movie.

Here you go, Marshal.

It's Dr. Zhivago.

Yamago's a little sappy every time she
sees him.

Oh. Kind of like Mr. Belvedere when he
watches Willy Wonka and the Chocolate

Factory.

It was the first movie Daddy ever took
me to.

He wanted to be romantic on our first
date.

Yeah, and anyway, the line was too long
for the dirty dozen.

Hey, Mr. Belvedere, what's your up to?

3 ,499.

That's all right.

The world's record, 3 ,500.

That's dumb. You should have done two
more.

Wesley, didn't it ever occur to you that
the door was closed for a reason?

Because you're dressed like that?

I was going to bed.

But I'm bored. Mom and Dad are
downstairs hogging the TV.

Well, there must be something you can
do.

Why don't you torrent your sister?

She's at Angela's. Oh.

Come on, Mr. Belvedere. Let's play
Chinese checkers.

We could use peanut M &Ms.

Why don't we play Farm and Save My Baby?

Then I can drop you from the window.

Well, here we are.

You sure nobody's home?

Oh, no, don't worry, Denise.

Everybody went to the movies. We've got
the whole place to ourselves.

Why don't you have a seat on the sofa
and I'll get the fire going.

I think these people are going to have
to move first.

No kidding.

Bye. It was nice meeting you.

Get turned around and no one's fed All
hands look out

below There's a change in the status quo
Gonna need all the help that

we can get Sporting to our new arrival
Life is

more than mere survival We just might
live the good life yet

I can't eat this waffle.

It's still frozen.

Breathe on it.

That'll melt the butter as well.

Hey, guys.

Morning, Heather.

And how was your slumber party?

Oh, great. We stayed up all night, and
around two in the morning, some guys

the football team showed up and tried to
pull a panty raid.

A what?

Well, you know where a bunch of big guys
go crazy and steal your underwear?

Don't they have that in England?

Yes, but we call that half -time at the
soccer match.

Morning. Morning.

Hi, Mom.

Hi, Dad.

Your date last night seemed very nice.

Yeah, maybe next time you'll be able to
meet her standing up.

Well, see you, pal. Your mom and I are
going down to Lumberama. Yeah, we figure

with spring coming, it might be nice to
have a hammock.

Maybe you should get a trampoline.

Did I miss something?

I just can't stand it around this place
anymore. I mean, there's no privacy.

I can't even bring a girl home without
someone embarrassing her.

Well, if you mean the night my mambo
club came over. No, no, it's not just

It's everything. I feel like I'm
suffocating.

Well, if you decide to move into the
woods, take him with you.

didn't skip over any bills or anything?

No, that's everything. I even remembered
to pay Belvedere. Of course, that's not

much.

I guess with both of us working now, we
have more money than we know what to do

with. I never thought we'd have that
problem.

Perhaps I could help you solve it.

Hey, maybe this is the year we go to
Hawaii.

Sure.

Hey, and when we get there, will you buy
me one of those little hula girls?

We're just doing the bills.

Yes, sir. Yes.

Hey, look, pal, we're sorry about last
night. I mean, your mom and I didn't

to cramp your style. Oh, no, it's okay.
Besides, I don't think it's going to be

a problem anymore.

What do you mean?

I've been thinking about maybe moving
out.

Moving out?

Yeah, I'm in college now, and I think
it's about time that I have my own

apartment. I mean, if it's okay with you
guys.

Well, if you're sure you can swing it,
pal. Yeah, I've got my job at Mr.

Clark's. And besides, I could always get
a roommate.

I mean, the kid's 19.

I know, but he... Well, if he doesn't go
now, we might never get rid of him.

Fine, fine.

Okay, pal, you can start looking.
Thanks.

I already found one. I move in Tuesday.

Hey, Mr. Belvedere.

Mr. Belvedere.

You were supposed to be helping your
brother move.

I am.

Kevin said he needed some stuff to
decorate his new apartment, so I got him

this.

I hope you got that from a dentist.

Get it back.

Oh, here, let me help you with that. Oh,
no, no, no, it's okay, really.

That's Mr.

Teddy.

How original.

Oh, I just thought I... take them along
with me, you know, for old time's sake.

Oh? Would you like me to pack your baby
blanket?

It's already in the car.

What's all this?

Mom wanted Kevin to have some of her
home cooking.

I thought that was one of the reasons he
was leaving.

Don't forget the muffins.

Well, everything's loaded, so I guess
this is it.

All right.

Now remember... I want you to eat right
and get plenty of rest.

And don't forget to take your Geritol.

He knows what I mean.

Come on, Mom. I'm going to be fine. I'm
only a few miles away.

Besides, I'll be back once a week to
drop off my laundry.

Well, pal, I guess you want to get
going. Just remember, if you need us,

here. Thanks, Dad.

And remember, Kev, the only safe sex is
no sex.

That's what your mom tells me.

Well, I'd better get going.

Well, good luck. Kevin.

So,

how

about one of those famous muffins?

You know, it seems like only yesterday
that we were bringing him home from the

hospital and those little blue booties.

have his room?

What? Well, I'm kind of bored with mine.

Hey, hold on, kitten. I mean, your
brother's barely out the door.

I'm sorry.

Of course, now that you mention it, it
could make a great TV room for your old

pop.

I woke up this morning and realized I
didn't have any food.

Funny. I woke up and thought I did.

Well, anyway, I decided I'm going to
have to get a roommate to help pay for

rent. Oh?

Isn't Mr. Teddy kicking in?

See, I'm going to put this down in the
school paper.

Handsome sophomore seeks blonde
nonsmoker to share rent and good times.

What do you think?

I think if someone named Lars turns up,
you're in big trouble.

I better get going before Mom sees me
and starts crying again.

Okay, here's the choices we got for
Kevin's room. We got Mom's law library.

Boo! Your old dad's TV room. Eh.

Kitten's aerobics gym and Westman's
combination arcade and discipline room.

That way I can go there whether I've
been good or bad.

Hey, what do you think we should do, Mr.
Belvedere?

About what? Kevin's room. Everybody
wants to do something different with it.

I think you should all compromise and
give it to me.

You've got a room.

You mean that glorified telephone booth?

I can barely turn around in there. It's
not the room's fault.

I just thought it would be nicer to have
a larger room. What with everybody

barging in on me all the time.

Well, it's no fun if you knock.

Hey, big guy, I always thought you liked
our company.

Yes, I love people waking me up with
their moronic problems.

Well, if you don't like it, why don't
you do something about it? Oh, perhaps I

will. What do you mean, Mr. Belvedere?

I'm moving out, too.

Do you really think Mr. Belvedere will
move out?

All the food's here.

You know, this is all your fault.

Me? What did I do? Everything. You're
disgusting and obnoxious.

I mean, there's nothing to worry about.

You know the big guy. He's just letting
off a little steam.

Yeah, right. It's not Mr. Belvedere
talking. It's his empty stomach.

Well, goodbye, everyone.

See you in the morning.

So, anyway, I'm in this country from
Romania to study computer science and

animal husbandry.

Shh. Blaine, don't interrupt.

Yeah, well, listen, uh, Anatole, I
really appreciate you coming by.

There's a few other people interested,
but I'll certainly keep you in mind.

Thank you very much. You know, Gwen and
I are used to having our own room.

I'll remember that.

Well, the bedroom certainly seems nice.

Yeah, and don't worry. I can sleep on
the fold -out bed.

Up to you.

I guess there's a few things you should
know about me.

Um, I work as a tutor, so I'd be more
than happy to help you with term papers

and stuff like that.

Uh -huh.

Oh, and I'm captain of the women's
volleyball team, so the girls might be

lot, if that's okay with you.

Oh, well, I guess it is.

Oh,

is this an Eastern exposure?

Uh, yeah.

Yeah, I think it is. Great.

I like to sunbathe nude in the morning.

Makes two of us.

with the freezer on the bottom.

Yeah.

I hate that.

I'm never going to find anybody.

Hi there, roomie.

Is this an Eastern experience?

You haven't got a roommate yet, have
you?

Well, I did kind of promise a place to
this nice Romanian family.

Oh.

What I mean is, are you really sure you
want to do this?

I won't be in the way.

I still have to report to work at your
parents.

So... All I'll really be doing is
sleeping here.

All right.

Let's give it a try.

Splendid.

Oh, listen.

The sofa pulls out into a nice king
-size bed. I think it's more comfortable

than the one in the bedroom.

In that case, you can have it.

to see that way.

If you're looking for my ding -dongs,
they're under the sink.

I mean the sink in my apartment.

If there's nothing else, I think I'll be
clocking out.

Oh, are you leaving already?

I want to get back to my pad before
wrestling starts.

Wrestling's not on TV tonight.

I know.

I have a date.

Belvedere, you've been gone almost a
week already. Don't you think we could

down and talk about this?

Yeah, you're probably ready to come
crawling back by now.

Actually, these arrangements suit me
perfectly.

Oh, yeah? Mm -hmm. My duties are clearly
defined. My evenings are off.

And you two have more time to enjoy your
children.

If I watch a little TV...

your psych class. I hope you don't mind.

Sure, why not?

What about my economics class?

You taking that too?

No, I'm teaching it.

after dinner, but he's not here after
dinner anymore, so I'm bothering you.

Oh, well, that's fine, honey. Why don't
you sit down right here and you can

bother me all you want. But that's no
fun.

Mr. Belvedere usually says get lost or
go play on the expressway or something.

Hey, Mom, look who's here.

Yes, what's his name? Our oldest kid.

Nice to see you, stranger.

Oh,

you look so thin. Are you getting enough
to eat?

Not if he's living with Belvedere.

I guess I'm just not used to seeing so
much of Mr.

Belvedere. I saw him once in Justice
Shower Camp.

He's there every morning, every night.

He's even taking classes with me now.

Well, I'm sure it'll all work out.

Well, I really can't stay. I've got a
date with Denise.

She stopped by to get some tapes I left
in my room.

Oh, hey, Cap, they're not up there
anymore. They're in the garage with the

of your junk.

Huh?

this happen? About five minutes after
you left.

Hey, pal, don't feel bad. It was either
that or give it to Belvedere.

You mean that's how he wound up with me?

Yeah, you're so lucky.

I'll be in the garage screaming.

Sorry about dinner.

That's okay.

I mean, except for the fire, it was real
nice.

Yeah, well, I never made Vienna sausage
flambé before.

I didn't think the planes could shoot so
high.

So, uh, what do you want to do now?

I don't know.

We could start another fire.

Kevin, is this your tie?

I found it hanging on the doorknob.

It's over, dear.

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I interrupt
something?

Look, when there's a tie on the
doorknob, it means there's a girl in

you're not supposed to come in. Oh.

Oh, at Cambridge, I'll see if there was
a pig's head on a pole.

Oh, look, I'm in the way. I'll just go
sit outside on the curb until you're

done. No, no, no, that's okay.

Kevin was just taking me home.

question, and the category is hostess
products.

You probably bet everything.

Did someone have a bad day?

What happened? I thought you were going
to clean this place up.

I was going to make the bed.

Then I realized I was in it.

What's the matter?

It's just, I bust my butt all day at
school.

I spend five hours on my feet slinging
greasy chicken.

I mean, the place is a mess, and there's
not even dinner on the table. But you

realize that I happen to work, too.

Look, I'm too tired to fight, aren't I?
Oh, sure. You come waltzing in here and

start criticizing, and when I try to say
something, all of a sudden, you're too

tired. Look, don't startle with me. Oh,
I'm the one who started?

Hey, Fred and Wilma, you want to knock
it off in there?

What's happening to us, Kevin?

I don't know.

But I'm getting scared.

Seems that our little arrangement isn't
quite working.

Oh. I guess we just get along better in
small doses.

But we sure did give it the old college
try, huh? Oh, we certainly did.

But perhaps some things just aren't
meant to be.

Right.

Now you both have to take off your
shirts. What?

That's what Grandma Hufflingel taught
me.

Hi. Hey, Kev. Moving back in?

Here. See ya.

decided that all of you have suffered
enough, including Kevin.

Well, we'll try to respect your privacy
from now on. We promise.

Yeah, and if I ever get the urge to
bother you, I'll just go bother Heather

instead. Yeah, if you really want the
other room, big guy, it's yours.

Thank you, but I think I'll stick to
mine.

Perhaps with a better lock.

Well, if there's nothing else, I'll
unpack my things.

Well, we kept your room exactly the way
you left it. Thank you.

Except Dad and I found the ding -dong.

and my pet tarantula had babies in your
underwear drawer.

Well, it's good to be home.

Mr.

Belvedere, we'll be right back.

Kevin is still unable to find a suitable
roommate.

Poor lad.

After living with me, everyone else
pales by comparison.

He'd better find one soon, or he'll be
moving back here to the Owens Asylum.

Speaking of asylum, I seem to have been
granted it by the family.

Nobody's been up to bother me in almost
three hours.

Not even Wesley.

Perhaps I'll go and bother him.

Dolly Parton, and I couldn't be more
excited.

Wesley,

don't answer that.