All language subtitles for mr_belvedere_s04e05_moonlighting

Coming up on Night Live, hits and tell
books, where insiders speak out and

leave co -workers stewing. Among the
guests, Larry Speaks and former CBS News

president, Ed Joy.

Sunday at 7, two children form an
unusual bond of friendship to save the

legendary Sasquatch. It's the exciting
conclusion of Bigfoot on the Disney

Sunday movie.

Mr. Belvedere, we're going to be late.

It's all right, Wesley. We'll get to the
theater in plenty of time.

But it's a new Jaws movie. I don't want
to miss the first time the shark eats

somebody.

If he can have a snack, so can I.

Well, okay. I'm going to go stand in
line and get our tickets.

Remember, no peeking pockets.

Well, then you'd better give me some
money.

Thanks.

All right, honey, what would you like?

Nothing. How about a hamburger and a
chocolate shake?

No. I didn't want to come here anyway.

I wanted sushi.

Oh, honey, we don't have time for that.
What about some nice fried chicken? No.

A hot dog? No.

I got tacos and burritos. I hate Mexican
food.

Oh, then what about a nice fish
sandwich? That's almost like sushi.

No, it's not.

It is if you eat it raw.

Can you like that? Yes, I can. So order
your stupid hamburger before I put your

buns on the grill.

May I have a hamburger and a chocolate
shake, please?

What a nice little girl.

When you dropped Mr. Jacket, as you came
through the door, no one glared.

According to our new rival, life is more
than mere survival.

And we just might live a good life yet.

Okay, I got the crystal diode all
attached.

Are you sure this is going to work?

Doesn't look like a radio to me.

Sure, I'm sure.

See, the cylinder is wrapped in copper
wire. The tuner strip is in place.

All we gotta do now is hook up the
antenna.

Hey!

I'm not getting anything.

We may have to put you on the roof.

Hello, boys.

Giving Miles a jump start, are we?

No, I'm an antenna.

Not anymore.

What is all this?

It's supposed to be a crystal set for
our science project, but I can't seem to

get it to work.

Regardless, you shouldn't go around
attaching wires to people, even if they

a good place to put them.

Where were you all day? You could have
helped him. It was my day off. I had

business to do.

Well, that's all right. You can help us
tonight, right?

I may have more business to do tonight.

Where's Mr. Belvedere? I don't know. I
think he's out getting a paper. But he

said not to let your eyes get cold.

7 .45 a .m.

Subject ingests experimental substance.

Huh?

7 .45 and 10 seconds.

No visible effects.

Respiration appears normal.

Doctor, what are you doing?

My science project. Just keep eating.

What are you talking about? Did you put
something in my eggs?

746. Subject becomes hysterical. I'm
going to kill you.

And violent.

Mom, Wesley poisoned me. What?

Okay, pal, I told you about that before.

I didn't do any of your stupid eggs.
It's just an experiment on the power of

suggestion. Well, I suggest you find
yourself a new experiment, understand?

Yes, ma 'am.

Juice?

Yeah, I was up till one study and I
never even saw him come in.

You know, the big guy's been bugging out
every day for a week now.

I wonder what he's doing.

Maybe he's got a broad stash someplace.

Where?

That's what Dad says.

Leslie, Mrs. Huffnagle just called. She
wants to know why she has a jacuzzi full

of jello.

on the density of matter. You know,
solid versus liquid?

I guess solid won.

Well, you're going to march right over
there and clean it all up, and that

includes the fruit cocktail.

The only experiment I do, somebody yells
at me. I'm just trying to do my best.

I know, honey, but you've got to learn
to be more responsible.

I'm sorry, I will.

Okay. Now, look, this looks like a nice
little experiment.

Yeah, it's okay, I guess. Sure it is.

In case you're wondering, you're not
pregnant.

Go!

Hi, Leslie.

Oh, hey, Miles.

Checked out some real good books for our
science project.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. See, I got the little golden book
of science, Dr. Rizzo's fun experiments

for boys and girls, and Friedman's
advanced theory and application of

energy.

That sounds like fun.

Okay, guys, I made you a couple of
hoagies. Oh, great. I'm starving. Yeah,

was the worst dinner Mr. Belvedere ever
made.

Yeah, I don't mind canned ravioli, but
he could have at least heated it up.

Maybe Wes is right. Maybe he is seeing
somebody.

Yeah, and I bet she's a real bimbo, like
a stripper or something, and he's

ashamed to bring her home.

Hey, look at this.

Maybe this is what he's doing at night.
Huh?

Donut shop bandit baffles police.

Now, this guy's only taking money.

Come on, Mr.

Belvedere. You gotta help us.

There's a lot of complicated stuff in
here.

I'm sure you'll do just fine.

Well, if there's nothing else, I think
I'll be off. Oh, sure, big guy. Where

you going?

Oh, I don't know.

I thought I might take in a movie.

Oh, yeah?

Well, maybe I'll go with you. Oh, no,
no, no, George. You wouldn't enjoy it.

It's an English film with no subtitles.

He's not going to the movies.

Yeah, I say we follow him.

Hey, Wes, what Mr. Belvedere does on his
own time is his own business, so let's

just leave him alone.

Okay, Wes, man.

Okay.

You know, they didn't say you couldn't
follow him, and I can follow you.

Let's go.

So where'd he go?

I don't know.

He must have gone in here.

Maybe this is where his girlfriend
lives.

Stay down.

All right, everyone.

Dinner in ten minutes.

So has he got a girlfriend?

No, he's got a whole other family.

It just seemed sad, wasn't it?

Hello.

How was the movie?

Oh, pretty good.

Mr. Belvedere, we know what's going on.

They're keeping a family on the side,
you two -timing.

I'm sorry.

I should have told you this before.

that I'd be moonlighting with a family
named Belinsky.

But why?

Do you need the money?

Yeah, I mean, if that's the reason, Dad
can always give you a raise.

Actually,

the whole thing happened quite by
accident.

I was at the mall, and there was this
woman with a child actually more

frightening than Wesley.

Yeah? Anyway, when I told her that I was
a housekeeper, she started in about

what a mess her family was.

Now she would kill for somebody
wonderful like me.

I really couldn't argue.

So how long are you going to be doing
this stuff?

Oh, don't worry.

Just as long as it takes to get them
back on their feet.

Well, that's what you said to us, and
that was three years ago.

Yes, well, hopefully they'll take
direction better than you.

Hello, Buzz.

I made some brownies. Would you like
one?

Uh -huh.

That's rather an interesting little
model you seem to be making.

Yeah, it's a Messerschmitt.

When I'm done with this one, I'll have
every plane in the German Air Force.

Yes, I've noticed your rather one -sided
interest in World War II.

Jawohl.

Want to have a brownie?

Sure.

here. Yes, and he's making liver for
dinner.

I can't stand liver.

And I can't stand you, so we're even.

Hey, Mr. B.

Hello, Bobby. Back from school?

Yeah, you were right. It wasn't so bad.

I may go again tomorrow.

Well, good for you.

Did I get any phone calls?

Just one.

From the football team.

Wanting to thank you for a lovely
evening.

You guys are so sweet.

You know, Bobby, maybe it's none of my
business, but I think a young lady

maintain certain standards regarding the
young gentleman she associates with.

They're 13 and 1.

I'm home.

Well, Bud, how was your day?

Every day's the same. It never changes.

I don't know why I even bother.

Well, if it's any consolation, the dog
ran away.

Oh, hi, honey.

I thought I heard you come in.

I just got up from my nap.

I'm quitting, B. I'm quitting.

I can't take the pressure anymore.

Oh, Bert, we've been through this a
hundred times.

You work for the post office. There is
no pressure.

But there is for me.

I mean, all I can think about are
packages getting smashed and letters

zip code. Oh, honey, please. You've got
to stop bringing your work home with

you.

Oh, nuts.

You better mail these.

Certainly.

Come on, honey, sit down and relax. Your
show's on. Oh, yeah.

Before you get too engrossed in the
adventures of Gumby, I'd like to remind

of our little agreement.

We know, Mr. Belvedere, you won't be
here forever.

Exactly.

We don't mind. A year from now, we
probably won't even need you.

Look at Pokey.

Okay, Heather, we'll be back around 11.

You keep an eye on Wes. Why can't he go
to the restaurant with you guys?

They might remember him from last time.

Oh, I wish Mr. Belvedere was here. Then
I could go to the movies with Angela.

Look, we can do without Mr. Belvedere
for a couple of days. Besides, it won't

hurt you to stay home once in a while.

So, uh, where is Wes anyway?

Oh, I don't know. He's been upstairs
with Miles all day doing his stupid

project. Oh, yeah? So what did they
finally decide on? I don't know, but he

promised me it was nothing crazy. They
just picked something right out of his

little science book.

Okay, kid. See you later. All right.

And no guides.

really went better for you at work
today, dear? Sure.

Just as Mr. Belvedere said, people don't
expect much from the post office

anyway, so why disappoint them? Right,
Lynn?

Something like that.

Mom, I'm all finished.

Can I be excused, please?

Oh, listen to Miss Manners. Certainly
you may, Brent.

Me too, okay, Mom? I want to finish my
model of the Vatican.

Oh, yes.

Bobby, I wonder if you'd help me clear
the table.

Oh, certainly, Mr. Belvedere.

I don't have to be at choir practice for
an hour.

Oh, Mr.

Belvedere, you've been the answer to our
prayers.

I usually am.

No, really, we don't know how to thank
you. It's like we're a whole new family.

Yes, which is why it's time for me to
go.

What?

Well, you knew it was only temporary.

Yes, but this is so sudden.

I realize that, but I'm sure you'll do
just fine without me.

Yeah, sure.

Of course, I'll finish the kitchen
before I go.

This movie was edited for TV.

That guy's supposed to get a pole
through his head and they didn't even

Shut up.

Yeah, knock it off.

Anyway, look, Wes, that guy's getting
his brain sucked out.

Hello, Wesley. I have school tomorrow.
You should be in bed.

I came in your home awfully early from
your date. I assume it was a disaster.

What are you doing here?

Yeah, we didn't think you were coming
back tonight.

Oh, no, I'm home for good.

My service with the Belinsky family is
officially over. That's great.

Yeah, we're glad to have you back, Mr.
Belvedere. Thank you, Wesley.

Come on, Heather, let's go hide the
cookies.

Too late.

The Balinskys, we want them back.

Well, why don't you folks come on in?

What's going on?

These are the Balinskys.

Mr. Melvedere's other family.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Bea, and this is
Bert, Bobby, Buzz, and Brenda.

Well, I'm Marcia. This is George, Kevin,
Heather, and Wesley.

Hey, Mom.

Their names all start with different
letters.

Shh. It's not nice to make fun of
people.

I hope I'm having a nightmare.

What are you all doing here?

The minute you left, everything just
started to fall apart.

But it's only been three hours.

We know. It's been a living hell. Come
on, Belvedere, please. You've got to

back home with us. This is his home.

He's not our friend.

He's so... Yeah, but we had him first.
So what? Will

you please control your children?

There's nothing wrong with my children.

Bobby, get away from him.

Mom!

You can't talk to us like that.

Well, maybe you can.

We should all move to neutral corners.

Look, Bert.

I'm very flattered by this visit.

But I thought I made it perfectly clear
that I cannot continue working for both

families. So, just work for us.

We have that room over the garage.

Buzz will move out his taxidermy stuff
and we'll fix it up real nice.

I appreciate that, but I don't think...
You know, we don't usually go barging

into people's houses like this, and I'm
sorry, but we just didn't know what else

to do.

Look, the thing is, we were pretty much
through as a family until you showed up

and gave us some hope.

You can't do that to people and then
just disappear.

The Owenses have had you for three
wonderful years. It's time to give

else a chance.

Don't fall for that, Mr.

Belvedere. Just tell them to hit the
road.

It's up to you, big guy.

You know, I have been here longer than I
planned.

And you five have made greater progress
than I ever dreamed of.

No, we haven't. We're still screwing up.
Yeah, I took the car last week without

permission and got a ding in the door.
Yeah, and I almost had a beer tonight.

Me too.

Right.

Look, I'm very touched by these feeble
admissions of guilt.

But I think it's for the best.

What's going on?

Oh, no, I thought...

I think the book was right. I should
have done it in the desert.

And you deliberately disobeyed.

Yeah. This is probably the worst thing
I've ever done.

Mr. Belvedere, you can't leave me. I'm
still a minister of society.

Yeah, don't leave us alone with him.
He's an animal.

I mean, I'm a little afraid of the kid
myself.

I think everything's okay.

I'm staying with you. But why? We're
still a worse family than they are.

Yeah, they don't need you as much as we
do.

It's not how much they need me.

It's how much I need them.

Good night.

Mr. Bilinski. Mrs. Bilinski.

Bobby. Brenda.

Buzz.

You can wipe those silly smirks off your
face.

I only said that to get rid of them.

Sure, big guy.

Well, good night.

He's really just a big softy, isn't he?

Not for long.

Wesley!

I wasn't going to build that thing in my
room.

We'll be right back.

As the condition of my room illustrates,
leaving the Owenses alone, even

briefly, can have the most explosive of
consequences.

Fortunately, nothing of real value was
harmed, including my journals, which

been keeping in a lead -lined box, just
in case.

Have I really been here this long?

December the 12th, 1984.

I find fate has deposited me with the
Owens family, a somewhat provincial

household in the suburbs of Pittsburgh.

Is this the Owens residence?

Uh -huh.

And I take it you're one of them?

Uh -huh.

Is there someone here who speaks
English?

Pardon me, Mr... That's Belvedere. Lynn
Belvedere. Lynn?

That's a girl's name.

Wesley. Wesley?

A difficult birth, I take it.

Maybe Mr. Belvedere should wait until
we're sure it's safe.

individual members are well -intentioned
enough, they do seem a bit out of touch

with one another.

But, with a certain amount of patience
and direction, I'm sure I can whip them

into shape.

Even George.

They're damn lucky to have me.

You know what?

They still are.