All language subtitles for The Ropers s02e18 Man About The House

The TV dinners are in the freezer.
Right. My sister's telephone number's on

table, and so is the babysitter's. Now,
remember, if you decide to go out,

you've got to give her 24 hours' notice.
Got it. Now, have a wonderful... Oh!

And make sure David takes his vitamins.
They're on the counter. They're the blue

ones with the yellow childproof caps.
That's nice. Now, what about Daddy? His

are the yellow ones with the blue
childproof caps. No.

Billy, that's not what I'm talking
about.

Huh? Aren't you forgetting something?

What?

Ann, I'm not going to see you for three
days and nights. Now, isn't there

something you want to leave me with?

Underwear.

What? I forgot to put away the laundry.
Ann, I'll do that. David is going to be

fine. Are you sure?

He'll be with his father.

Maybe I shouldn't go.

Now, honey, now, don't be ridiculous.

Oh, you're right. You're right.

I'll take him with me.

You're going to take him out of school
to go to a baby shower? Now, you'll do

such thing.

Come on, come on. Your cab is waiting.

Oh, I've never left David before.

A child's first time away from his
mother is very difficult.

He'll be very upset.

Oh, hi, Mommy.

Are you still here?

Kiss Mommy goodbye.

Oh, David, you know I wouldn't leave you
if I didn't have to, don't you? I know.

Come on.

Cap is waiting. Well... Have a nice
trip.

Oh, but... Goodbye.

Adieu. Goodbye.

Au revoir.

Oh,

women are so hysterical.

Can you believe your mother, David?

David?

David?

David? David?

David? Oh, my God, I've lost him.

Almost scared me to death.

Don't ever leave me like that again.

I'll take three cards.

Dealer stands pat.

says you got nothing.

Cost you more than that to see what I
got.

See your hundred?

Raise you five hundred.

Is there someone in that chair that I
should know about?

No, I'm just practicing for Don
Webster's poker game.

You still going to that thing after last
week's game?

why you don't just mail him the money
and save yourself the trip.

Eli, just read your book. I'll play the
cards, okay?

Okay. Okay.

Oh.

Oh. You're blowing my cards.

Oh,

Stanley, listen to this.

Philip took me in his arms and said it
would never last.

Because you are 25 and I am twice that?

Are we so different from the mountains
and sky which will remain entwined

forever?

Isn't that beautiful?

What do you think Philip will do?

Throw up.

What? Come on, a woman who's twice as
old as her lover? It's unnatural.

Trying to have an intelligent
conversation with you is unnatural.

We will use reason.

I mean, picture yourself with a 25 -year
-old boy.

Helen. Quiet, Stanley. The picture isn't
over yet.

I'll see your 500 and raise you a
thousand.

I won, Helen. Look at this. I won.

How? You don't have anything.

I know. I blocked them.

Oven at 450 degrees.

Hi, David.

David, what are you doing?

Having a snack.

Why? I'm hungry. And you will have
dinner in exactly seven and a half

But Mommy promised me TV dinners. Oh,
please.

I'm so shocked at your mother.

I mean, our growing boy deserves a nice
home -cooked meal.

But, Mommy, promise... Your mommy just
likes to make a mystery out of cooking.

All women do.

You see, David, cooking is really quite
simple if you are well -organized and

you use common sense.

Now, you take this salad, for example.
There's no reason to sit all afternoon

slicing up tomatoes.

Calorie to make an attractive salad.

All sliced.

Mommy's salad doesn't look like soup.

My spaghetti!

And in a few seconds, the meatballs will
be ready, and then I'll take the garlic

bread out of the oven.

And voila, dinner.

Ah, my garlic bread.

No, no, no. My spaghetti.

Daddy. Not now, David.

to put the spaghetti back into the pot.

No,

no, no, no.

Are we having a fire? No, no, we're not
having a fire.

Why is that smoke coming out of the
oven? Well, that's because the garlic...

meatballs for you david delicious now
sit down darling sit down and i'll i'll

serve up these delicious meatballs for
you sit down everything's under control

daddy's coming with meatballs there we
go look at

that look at that feast there

Leftover macaroni and cheese.

Thought you might like some.

Well, that's very nice of you, Mrs.
Roper, but we're doing quite well on our

own. Thank you.

Oh, is that a meatball I see over there
on the floor?

Oh, yes, it is. Yes, it is.

Maybe you should heat up a casserole.
Yes, maybe.

Careful now.

I'm going to finish my book. David, wait
a minute. I thought your teacher gave

you until Friday to read it.

Tomorrow is Friday.

David, if tomorrow were Friday, then
today would be Thursday.

And if today were Thursday, then I'd be
incredibly late for my very important

business dinner with Mr. Powell.

But today is Thursday.

Now look, David, today is Thursday.

No, no, no, no, it can't be.

I don't have a babysitter. I'm late.

Mr. Brooks. You don't understand.

Powell's probably at the restaurant
right now. Mr. Brooks, why don't you

leave David at our house? No, no, no.
Well, it's only for a few hours, but are

you sure you don't mind babysitting? Oh,
no, no, not me. I'm going to my

sculpture class, but Mr. Roper will be
glad to stay with us. Mr. Roper, no, no.

I could never ask him to do that. Oh,
Sammy won't mind.

No, I'm talking about David.

No, I mean, it wouldn't be fair to ask
him to spend the entire evening in that

store. Mr. Woods, I like Mr.

Roper. Was I talking to you?

And Mr. Roper likes David.

You know, actually, he's very good with
children. They have the same kinds of

minds.

David, I want you to be a good boy. And
I want you to mind Mr. Roper. And be

sure that you... Daddy, you'll be late.
Don't worry.

Oh, isn't he cute?

He's so worried that I'm worried. Now,
don't worry, little fella. I'm not

worried. I'm not worried.

I'm just leaving my only son with
Stanley Roper. Oh, my God.

Hi,

Mr. Roper.

Oh, hi, David. What are you doing here?
Oh, Mr. Brooks had to go out, so you're

going to have to mind David for a while.

What?

Joey's coming here to take me to the
poker game.

So, you'll miss it tonight.

I can't. The guys are counting on me.

Too bad. They'll just have to find
another sucker.

Why don't you stay and watch it?

Stanley, this is the last night of my
sculpture class.

Now, look, you keep your eye on him, you
hear? And whatever you do, don't fall

asleep. I promise Mr.

Brooks you take good care of him. Helen.
Good night, David.

Helen!

I'm sorry, Mr.

Roper. Oh, that's all right, David. It's
not your fault.

Would you like me to read to you? No,
no.

Would you like to watch the lady
wrestlers? I think they're on channel...

daddy doesn't want me watching TV.

Oh.

Well, we could go to the recreation room
and shoot some pool. My daddy thinks

I'm not old enough to shoot pool.

What do we do for fun?

Once upon a time, there was a bear named
Bobo.

He lived in a cave with Mrs. Bear and a
cousin bear and an auntie bear and...

the first time.

I mean, I'm sorry. It's just I had this
big card game tonight.

I'll play cards with you.

We play for money.

I have 50 cents.

I'll get the card.

You know how to play poker?

No. Good.

I mean, good because I can teach you.

Now, the first thing you have to do is
shuffle the cards.

Oh, can I do that?

No, no, no, no.

Let me show you how.

See, you gotta do it this way.

Why?

I'll see your penny, and I'll raise you
a penny.

Mr. Roper? Just a second, just a second.

He took four cards.

I think you're bluffing. Try me.

I'll see your penny, and I'll raise you
a penny.

I'll see that penny, and I'll raise you
two pennies.

What?

Okay.

I'll see your two pennies, and I'll
raise you a nickel. What do you think of

that?

I got three tens.

What do you got?

Three tens.

Aha! And two sixes.

Beginner's luck.

Let's play some more.

Why don't you read me a story?

Stand away!

Hey,

is your wife at home?

You just missed her.

You want one? Sure.

That'll be 40 cents.

Who's this?

This is David. David, this is Joey. Hi,
David. Good to meet you.

Want a cigar?

Too bad.

Well, let's get going.

I can't, I can't. I'm babysitting.

Hey, what are you trying to pull?

You know everybody's counting on you to
be there tonight.

Well, there'll be other guys there.

Yeah, but they know how to play.

He'll be coming tonight.

Gordy's going to be there tonight?

Yeah.

I never thought I'd see the Gordo at
another poker game.

Especially after the way you cleaned him
out last time.

But I thought that Thursday was his
Gambler's Anonymous meeting.

He dropped out.

Right after his uncle died and left him
all that money.

Well, I'll be seeing you, Stanley.

Just a second, just a second.

I can't. I gotta stay with David.

Why can't I go along?

To a poker game? Are you kidding?

I'm already at a poker game.

That's true.

Yeah, but his father.

If I don't say anything, and you don't
say anything... I won't

say anything.

Tell him. Wait, Helen, Helen. I gotta
write a note to Helen. What are you

tell her?

I'll tell her the truth.

I'm taking David to the aquarium.

We are going to see the biggest fish in
town, aren't we?

Stanley!

Stanley!

We'll be back soon if taking David to
the aquarium.

Who does he think he's kidding?

To the aquarium.

Thank you.

I didn't feel right about leaving David.
Oh, don't be silly.

It's perfectly all right. You go right
back to your meeting.

Mrs. Roper, I came to pick him up.

Who?

David.

How about a cup of coffee?

How about David?

Isn't he too young for coffee?

How about getting him?

I can't. Why not?

Maybe they're thinking of the answers.

Mrs. Roper, that is not how you play 20
questions.

Oh, it isn't? How do you play it?

Well, for you to start off, one person
thinks of an object, and the other

says, well, is it animal? Is it
vegetable?

Is it... Why am I telling you this?

David! Wait!

Wouldn't you like to see my bus?

That's very nice.

Excuse me. David!

Oh! Oh! What is this? Oh! Oh, my ankle!

What happened? I twisted it!

Oh! Oh! Oh, it's throbbing! All right,
just sit down on the couch. There you

There you go.

Where are you going? To get David.

No! No, you mustn't! Why not, Mrs.
Roper? What happened to your ankle?

The throbbing isn't there anymore.

Oh!

Don't you feel something, too?

Mrs. Rupert, my... My wife.

Your wife is away.

And my husband is... Upstairs.

I'll get him.

Do you know how long I've waited? I
don't even want to think about it.

Mrs. Rupert, you're... You're... Older
than you.

Does it matter that you are spring and I
am autumn?

Then you are 35 and I am almost... Are
we so different from the mountains

and the sky, which remain forever
entwined? Yes, we are very different.

Oh, my God!

Oh, Mrs. Roper, this is unseemly, Mrs.
Roper. Sorry, Mr. Roper, it's just that

heard something.

What? A noise. A noise?

Yeah, it could have been a burglar. A
burglar?

Disgustus, please.

No, no, no.

Disgustus.

Open

the

door.

What is going on?

Well,

you see... Yeah, that's the story of
Goldilocks.

When did you get here? Stay back, David.
There is a...

burglar out there. Oh, you're just
imagining.

Oh, no, no. I tell you, I heard
something.

Didn't you hear it, Mrs. Roper? No, I'm
always hearing things. Well, if you

don't care.

Roper, I think you should do something
about your wife.

What about my wife?

It's true.

The husband is always the last to know.

Come along, David.

Oh, no.

There it is again.

Oh, Mrs.

Roper.

Poker game?

Well, I'm glad I got here when I did.
The last thing I want my David exposed

is gambling.

I don't suppose David has time for some
milk and cookies?

Daddy. I'm sorry, David. It's way past
your bedtime.

Sorry, Mrs. Roper. You better deal me
out. That's right.

Deal?

Has he been eating properly?

And you?

Oh, things couldn't be more under
control.

They couldn't? I thought you'd be a
nervous wreck. Why?

I mean, what is there to be nervous
about? You women get so, so nervous

taking care of a child.

No, it's simple once you are organized.

Daddy, lunch is ready.

The Ropers was videotaped in front of a
studio audience.

Jack and Vicki fight over Jack's old
-fashioned ideas about money.

Three's a crowd.

Next on Deja View.