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Only a hardheaded gringo... Would come down here...
On a rescue mission... ALL ALONE.
This gringo is not going to talk.
Then kill him.
C'mon, the General's expecting us.
You can't use your gun...
...Shoot him with his.
it's not working.
This asshole's gun has no firing pin.
Leave him.
The dogs haven't had to kill for their food in a while.
Next time, amigo,
plan ahead.
Oh, I'm such a bad Catholic.
No, you're just sick in the head.
Don't forget the General's money.
That gringo bribed the wrong cop...
...and brought a gun with no firing pin.
♪ Catch me if you can ♪ ♪ I'm in 'em old school Barkley's. ♪
♪ Back to the fence ♪ ♪ puffin' on that Bob Marley. ♪
♪ Flow like oregano. ♪
♪ You already know my competition's ♪ ♪ stiffer than Ronald Regan. ♪
♪ Let it go. ♪
♪ For you be a mother... ♪
♪ You scrap it's too animated ♪ ♪ like The lncredibles. ♪
♪ Let this beef go around ♪ ♪ like the tenty six's ♪
♪ it's young Game of flame. ♪
♪ Welcome to the House of Pain. ♪
Where's my girl, fool?
She cool, man. She in there. She's still fine as hell.
So that's it? Bada-bing, you out of the game?
Done with the whole trade?
- Yeah. - Well, that's the problem, Bosco.
You either keep doing that,
or you do a 15-year bid in a Mexican prison
with Cheeto's cousin in there.
Same old shit. You choose how to flush the toilet, brother.
That's right. Easy way or the hard way.
Come on!
Okay, street soldier. Shit.
But watch yourself, B.A., now, you gonna lose your oldest friend here.
What's up, girl? You miss me?
Because I missed you. Yes, I did. It's been too long, baby.
Way too long.
Heck of a place.
Just a heck of a beautiful place.
Is this a time-share? I'd love to get in on this.
I like this whole Santa Fe motif you got going here, Tuco.
It's very Arizona, very Tex-Mex. It's good. It's good.
Maybe we can get the guy at my six
to whip up a couple of quesadiches, you know?
I want the flames to be seen by the Martians.
Americano, gringo.
- Army intelligence. - Who's that?
- You, man. - No.
You're not so intelligent because you're stuck in some tires.
I'm happy. I'm happy.
Doesn't get any better than this, right?
- I'm living the dream. - You are!
You're gonna come here...
...to throw me in a bag across the border...
...but instead you have sex with my wife.
Well, first of all, she's so hot,
and we both hate you. So that's just sort of how it...
- Good morning! - Good morning, man!
Now it's a party!
- Is that your best shot? - Now it's a party, man!
♪ A-ha, okay, what's up? ♪ ♪ Shut up. ♪
♪ A-ha, okay, what's up? ♪ ♪ Shut up. ♪
Whoa!
♪ Okay, what's up? ♪ ♪ Shut up ♪
♪ I got a pocket full of B's ♪ ♪ Cocoa weed and ain't got no place to go... ♪
Oh, hell, no.
Slide over slowly.
You jacking me?
What is this, opposite day?
I'm not a thief. But if I don't reach my friend in time, then he dies.
If you ain't a thief, I guarantee you ain't a killer.
Take your left hand off the wheel and your right hand off the shifter now.
You ain't gonna shoot me in the head, pops.
You know that ain't happening.
What the hell's wrong with you, man?
You shoot a total stranger?
I don't even know you, fool. Damn.
It'll heal, I promise.
- Here, wrap it in this. - I know how to make a tourniquet, fool.
I know it hurts, but I had to make a point with you.
That ain't what's pissing me off.
You shooting my van is what's pissing me off, man.
What's wrong with you?
You Army Ranger, son?
Be real careful of what you say next, pops.
And be ready to empty that burner if you start shit-talking my battalion.
Never shall I fail my comrades.
Gallantly will I show the world that I am a specially selected soldier.
Energetically will I meet the enemies of my country.
I shall defeat them on the field of battle
for I am better trained.
And I will fight with all my might.
Colonel Hannibal Smith. 75th Ranger Regiment.
4th Battalion. Fort Benning, Georgia.
I know who you are, sir. Corporal B.A. Baracus.
I mean, it was till I was dishonorably discharged for some bullshit.
I don't subscribe to coincidence, Corporal.
I believe that, no matter how random things might appear,
there's still a plan.
We fed him to the dogs.
That here in the middle of the Mexican desert,
when I needed him most,
I'd find a fellow Ranger.
Boy.
Now, I need your help to save another.
Bad news for you today!
This rescue that's coming, we fed him to the Rottweilers
- about an hour ago. - You know what's funny?
Is that you actually believe that you got me.
You actually think you're gonna kill me.
Can you drive?
Better than anybody you've ever seen, sir.
Nobody knew where you were hiding...
There was no intel... until now, asshole.
In a few minutes I'm gonna be having a cold beer,
and you are gonna be on fire. Take care, my friend.
- Alpha, Mike... - No!
...Foxtrot.
Think about it.
Adiós, mother...
Hannibal!
What are you doing?
Get in!
B.A., move.
This is bullshit!
Ahora, muerto!
Stop it! Please stop!
Please stop! Stop it! Stop! Please stop!
How's your day going?
This is not going to taste good.
Baby, I just threw up.
Let me get some gum. Let me just get some gum.
Did you see that? Did you see Tuco's face?
When you came over, that was unbelievable!
- How many times did I say it? - The timing was perfect.
- How many times did I say it, Face? - It was so beautiful.
- I told you not to take down Tuco alone. - What?
Well, you...
You know what? I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I didn't have the Hannibal Smith How-to Manual.
- Okay? I had to move. - And that move snowballs, Face.
You almost got yourself killed.
Which almost got me killed and almost got him killed.
Five-year-old.
You look like you got a real bad attitude.
What?
Did I shoot up your van?
Am I wearing your favorite shirt?
This is your favorite shirt?
Yeah, pretty boy, that's my favorite shirt.
Did you get shot for me, too?
- And carjacked. - By me.
Wait, and he still got you to drive?
Thank you. Peck.
Baracus. It's all good.
See, Face, this is what happens when we forget about plans
and just fire blind.
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry that I have feelings for a human being,
- that I fell in love. - Love?
Wait a minute. What about Miss Croatia three weeks ago?
Rescue sex.
I was just trying to save her.
- Save her? - Yeah.
Save her? How?
Please, do share with us your plan, Face.
Okay, I hadn't thought about that yet.
Exactly. I had to.
Her plane ticket.
Her work visa and her new passport.
And don't bullshit me that this was about her, Face.
This was all about Tuco.
Do you have a mag?
- Mike. - Boss man. How the hell are you?
- Still chewing the same dirt? - I am, unfortunately.
- And out here in lovely Mexico. - Good.
- So what have you got for me? - I got a fast bird doing pizza runs.
- The call sign is "Hatchet." - Hatchet. Okay.
And that is whatever you want it to be.
This is yours.
General, may I remind you, they don't take to the gringos.
I owe you one, okay?
- Let's not wait till Bragg again, huh? - Three years.
- And the kid. Still you and the chicks. - B.A. What?
How am I gonna just leave my girl like this, after all that?
I had to fight to get her back.
Leave the keys and we'll come back for her. Come on.
Looking shabby.
- What is the deal, brother? - Shoot anything that moves, okay?
- This is worse than Colombia. - I know Tuco, man.
Don't worry about it. I'll take her to war college in Saint Tropez.
I'll get you all their numbers, so don't worry about it.
- Face, look after the Corporal. - Yeah. Okay.
And you're covered in gas, which I think is interesting.
Find a treatment room, Corporal.
Make it quick. I'm gonna find our pilot.
Hey.
Hey, Doc, you got a second for a wounded vet?
Highly decorated combat pilot.
You ask him, he thinks he's the best in the world.
But he's a functioning lunatic.
Last week he tried to escape by jump-starting an ambulance.
Clear.
Damn it!
My kind of guy.
It almost hit your tattoo there.
Has anyone seen Mr. Murdock?
- The old Ranger tat. - Mr. Murdock?
Would you think I was crazy if I told you I had one of these?
Something wrong with your eyes, man.
- Mr. Murdock? - Not while I'm operating, nurse.
- Not now. - Why are you off the ward?
Is that gas? Is that you?
- I smell gas. - What do you mean, "ward"?
- What ward? - This man is a patient here.
Is this you? Don't listen to her, she's crazy.
Honestly, I'm a practicing doctor at Johns Hopkins University.
- Did you ask him to do a lightning bolt? - I asked for no lightning bolt.
- I'm calling security. - What's wrong with this fool?
- Is he crazy? - It is you.
- You on fire, man. - What? What's that?
- What the... - Oh, Jesus!
- You Rangers. I like you! - Are you crazy?
Hey! Hey, come on!
Corporal, off. Back off!
This is a hospital.
- Everybody's met Mr. Murdock. - Met him?
He lit my arm on fire.
He stitched a lightning bolt in mine, man.
Look at me, son.
I'm told you're a hell of a chopper pilot.
The best, sir.
I'm not getting on a chopper with this nut job.
Yeah, that's a good... Is he another one of your projects?
I'm a real soldier. I'm a Ranger, baby.
I'm worried!
I'm a Ranger, sir.
That's good enough for me.
You have been released into our care
- and reinstated, Captain. - I'm not even close to good with that.
Thank you, sir.
Let's get the hell out of here.
You gorgeous old rust bucket, you.
Did you miss your daddy?
Face, what's the most important part of a well-oiled plan?
To be one step ahead of the enemy,
- not to be running away from him. - Who says we're running?
What, we're going to go in this dinosaur
- with this freak show? - Yep.
♪ You spin me right ♪ ♪ round, baby Right round. ♪
- Rotors are good, sir. - Who is this guy?
Come on! Let's go!
We've got gringos to kill!
Murdock, get this thing in the air.
Hold on, boys!
I'm gonna try something I saw in a cartoon once.
What you talking about cartoons for? Get us the hell out of here!
We got a hot chopper to your six.
I'm blocking bullets. We're bulletproof.
We're bulletproof, boys!
Oh, heads up.
I see you, gringo!
You pancaked my van! I'm gonna kill you, fool!
You can't park there. That's a handicap zone.
- I knew you was crazy! I knew... - This is a mistake.
Fire! Fire! Fire!
Blow them out of the sky.
I've never tried this before!
Did you see that?
Did you see how he turned the helicopter?
Whoa! There's nothing like some good air-to-air combat, eh, boys?
Don't look at me! Look there!
He's only got heat seekers left.
Captain, get us out of here.
Hold on, this could get ugly!
Here we go! Come on, baby, climb!
Fire the missiles.
Whoa! Missiles! Come on, come on.
That's how we deal with heat seekers, chaps.
We go cold.
What the hell?
Face, get him in here!
Holy, shit! Oh, shit!
Got him!
Restart. Restart.
Close the door!
I know you're Airborne Rangers, but that was ridiculous!
You're gonna be okay.
Boss, the idea is to kill Tuco, not the other way around!
One step ahead of the game isn't a plan, kid.
Two to three steps ahead.
Beating an enemy's move before it's even made.
That's a plan.
Hatchet, Hatchet, lock on my LC.
General Tuco, you are currently engaged
in unauthorized warfare on United States military personnel.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no! You engaged me.
Repeat.
You are engaged in unauthorized warfare on United States military personnel.
Over United States air space.
- What? - Alpha, Mike...
- Foxtrot! - ...Foxtrot!
- In other words, Adiós, mother... - Oh, no.
Yeah!
Well done, Captain.
- That was awesome. - That wasn't awesome.
- You are a genius! - I'm never flying again in this thing!
I never should have doubted you, boss!
There's a plan in everything, kid.
And I love it when a plan comes together.
Gunpowder cooking. Nothing like it.
Face, you want it napalmed or nuked?
Nuke it.
- Nuke it! - Mmm-hmm.
Murdock, burn the hell out of it,
like it was damned.
Burn the whole place down, buddy.
- You want secret sauce? - No, no, no. None of that anti-freeze.
The secret's out. You crazy. Everybody knows.
No one can do an anti-freeze marinade like you can, Murdock.
But I got a little Bell's palsy last time I ate that.
It's only partial paralysis. Come on, take it like a man.
Yes, sir. I'm having that conversation right now.
We will enforce that. I've got it well in hand, sir.
I don't think you want me to be in the field partially paralyzed, bud.
Visitors.
Yeah.
Wow, I'm a little taken aback. I'm not gonna lie.
Lieutenant.
Oh, I'm sorry, am I supposed to call you Lieutenant back?
No, you're supposed to call me Captain.
Captain. Captain?
That's right.
Captain Crunch. Look at you. Wow.
So, I guess you said no to the kids, no to the family.
Just no ladder you can't climb, huh?
No, no, honey, I just said no to you.
Hello. My name's Percy.
Would you like some pork?
If I broke every bone in your hand, could you still do that?
This is crazy. Three years?
We haven't seen each other for three years,
this is what we're gonna talk about?
What would you like to discuss?
Did you take my Steely Dan CD?
I'm not even going to respond to that.
We listened to it, like, nine times in a row.
We were drinking that crappy cabernet. You remember that?
We were doing something else. What were we doing?
Do you remember what it was we were doing? It was in a bedroom.
You don't remember?
The only thing I remember is leaving.
Which is my fondest memory of you.
You guys are the best. Stay out of trouble, you hear me?
Take care. Yes. Thank you.
Keep that on.
Colonel, my name is Lynch, I'm with Central intelligence.
I knew a company man named Lynch back in the first Desert Storm.
Yeah, I come from a long line of Lynches.
You ever stop to consider that maybe the reason nobody trusts the CIA
is because nobody knows your real names?
What can I do for you, Mr. Lynch?
I need you to help me to stop Saddam's former flunkies
from stealing over a billion dollars in the next 30 hours.
Now, the only mint outside of the U.S. capable of printing our money
belonged to the Shah of lran.
During the lran-Iraq War, it went missing.
Rumor was, Saddam had stolen it.
And we stole it back during Desert Storm.
Well, you didn't get the engraving plates.
it didn't matter.
They would have had to rebuild a mint just to print those bills.
Well, sir,
it's happening as we speak.
Fedayeen thugs have seized what's left of the Iraqi National Mint
to run off billions of dollars in unbacked American currency.
How are they planning on moving the plates and a billion dollars
- out of Baghdad? - Armored convoy,
manned with former Iraqi spec ops.
You know, high speed, shoot-to-kill types.
So how do you plan on stopping them?
Listen, there's some rumors about some top-secret plates
being smuggled out of the city by Saddam loyalists.
Do you know anything about this?
Seriously, if you're going to make a play for these plates,
I'm waving you off right now.
'Cause it's my responsibility and it's my ass.
I'm serious.
- Face? - Mmm-hmm.
I will court-martial you.
- Whoo! Okay. - Hey.
Get the memo.
Tell your beloved Colonel Smith and stay the hell out of Baghdad.
You know,
you never came back. I thought you were gonna come back.
Well, this is me, coming back.
You think those clowns can really pull this off?
Listen, listen, I would never tell him this,
but they are the best clandestine unit in the four branches,
and they specialize in the ridiculous.
Shadow Peck and the rest of them.
- Do not let them out of your sight. - Yes, ma'am.
- Doesn't diablo mean "devil"? - Yeah, man.
God damn it, Hannibal, what do you want me to do?
If this were my operation and you wanted it,
- you would have the mission. - You let Black Forest deploy on this,
and it's an international incident, I promise you.
They're not soldiers.
They're frat boys with trigger fingers.
- Who's running the ground team? - Brock Pike.
Pike.
He's a thug. He's a cartoon character. Come on.
Hannibal, we have been ordered, ordered, mind you,
to stay out of Baghdad.
- Cut, dried, the end. - General,
we should find him a little wiggle room, don't you think?
You know, I knew another Lynch, a CIA stooge.
Stationed in Laos, '68.
- No relation. - Are you sure?
'Cause you remind me of him.
I'm due in Kabul in a few hours.
I'll be back here in 48. I'm assuming we're green and go.
Notify me otherwise.
He's wearing body armor in the HQ.
And that should tell you everything you need to know about the CIA.
Russ, let's do some good on the way out the door here.
Those plates are gonna do all kinds of damage.
Let me go get them.
Forget about it, Hannibal. Steer clear of this one.
Well clear of it.
This is a gauntlet run right through the heart of Sadr City.
Saddam Hussein was a certifiable madman,
but even he wasn't crazy enough
to go into that place more than once in 30 years.
We pulled out of there a week ago and already it's the Wild West.
You actually sound worried.
- And you actually seem offended. - Yeah.
Well, this isn't about you losing a step now.
I want you to know that.
- Hey. - Hey.
I'm 10 times the man I was when you met me.
- Uh-huh. - And twice as fast.
Russ,
the boys and I can get this done, minus the bloodshed.
Those plates can do all kinds of damage.
Don't make me beg.
I'd hate to see you beg, Hannibal.
You've been my friend for a long time.
More importantly,
you and those boys have possibly been
the most valuable military asset I have ever had at my disposal.
Now, you asked me not to make you beg.
Right now, I'm begging you.
Hannibal, please, let this one go.
Russ, this is too big an enterprise. We can't let these bozos do this.
It's way too big.
And you'd do it with or without my blessing?
No, that I wouldn't.
I need your blessing.
I'm not so sure that it is a blessing.
Good hunting, my friend.
Thank you.
How'd it go with the old man?
Same old, same old. What you got there?
Pictures of my new baby.
Oh, look at her. Who's a proud papa?
These pictures are the closest Murdock gets to that van.
It's ready for me when I go back to LA.
Listen, B.A., we're extending our stay a little bit.
We're going back into Baghdad.
I thought we was ordered to stay out of Baghdad.
- That's true, but I'm... - Smith.
- Pike. - I understand you and your grunts
are now stealing my gigs. I don't like that.
I figured you Black Forest guys would be busy
installing a dictatorship or overthrowing a democracy somewhere.
it's still the weekend, yet. That's nine-to-five stuff, pops.
Look at you clowns.
You're not soldiers.
You're assassins in polo shirts.
We'll make in a week what you guys make in a year.
Cash don't buy guts, kid,
or brains.
And you're short on both.
This is Morrison's base. Bug out of my op.
They make you wear the yellow shirt there, B.A.?
What's that stand for, "Barely Able"?
Get out of my way, punk.
Hey, don't sweat them.
They might have just done us a favor. A big one.
Let me see, we got one medium tank left.
I'm telling you, there's a reason she came back.
Face, I told you, forget about her.
The levels of ambition on this woman...
I ain't stepping foot in any type of aircraft, Hannibal.
No gliders, paper planes, ultra-lights.
- You ever gonna let me live that down? - No.
Mexico was a long time ago, and I saved your life.
How about thanking me for not whooping your ass at the hospital?
I was an Airborne Ranger until I met you.
And you chickened out just like...
- 263 jumps. - Just a thank-you would have been nice.
And one helicopter ride with you screws it up.
Airborne Ranger with a fear of flying. Like a punk!
B.A., for the last time, nobody leaves the truck
once we take it over. Okay?
My cousin takes me to this party where this amazing cover band
does this trash metal version of Hello by Lionel Richie.
- Yeah. - Yeah. It goes...
Hello, is it me you're looking for?
Guys, how long have they been in there?
- About three hours. - Three hours.
Three hours?
They've been in there for three hours? They haven't come out at all?
No one came out to take a leak, nothing?
- No. - Nope.
I've been here for three seconds and that sounds odd to me.
I've been watching that tent like a hawk.
Really? It looks like you're eating some risotto and sitting on your ass.
I don't know. I wanted the soup.
I wasn't eating risotto. I had... it's not risotto.
Yeah, boys.
Yeah, he wants to fight, doesn't he?
Damn, this is awesome. They got us a stripper, too.
You got that hot enlisted look. Me likey.
Before I throw you in the stockade, where are they?
They didn't tell us... Captain.
They just gave us a case of beer and 50 bucks apiece.
I got a hundred.
Oh, did you get a hundred?
You think we get to keep the hair?
Staging, movement, action plan.
There's a nice read for you.
Hell, yeah, Hannibal. This is it right here.
This is bat-shit insane.
- It's perfect. - This is beyond nuts, boss.
It gets better.
B.A., you'll need a piece of contoured metal to make a skid plate.
Let's go, fool.
Murdock, we'll need a car battery, too.
See if the boys at Black Forest can help us out.
Press credentials, we need them.
Hit the media tent and see what's lying around.
Sorry, my friend, I see you've put the...
South African microphone at the bottom.
You can't always put the CNN on top.
Private, there are two mics. I don't know if there is something...
♪ I was a moving man ♪ ♪ in my younger days. ♪
Murdock, we need a news camera.
See what you can do.
All right, sorry. Sorry. Sorry.
Hello. I'm...
I'm in love with you.
Listen, we're doing a preliminary poll of...
What are we talking about? Of the pull-out.
We're gonna need airbags, lots of them.
- What bureau are you with, darling? - Le Monde.
Are you French?
Hello, this is General Parker. I need...
Okay. It's for you.
Hey, fool, you need to call an air strike on yourself.
- We're good, mate. I'll meet you. - No, I think we need to get going now.
You need to understand what I'm telling you right now.
B.A., we're gonna need a magnet.
- Yeah! - A powerful one.
You ever seen Blue Man Group?
I'll pick up the rest.
I'm just gonna go for it.
Ooh, la, la.
What would you give for one chance
to come back here and tell our enemies
that they may take our lives,
but they'll never take our freedom!
Ready to go downtown?
Good luck tomorrow.
- Thank you. - Give 'em hell.
General Morrison, where the hell is Hannibal Smith?
Captain, you would do well to revise your tone and readdress me.
General, I have authority under DCIS that supersedes your command,
so last time, before this becomes embarrassing for the both of us,
where is Hannibal Smith?
Would you excuse us, General?
Captain, in nearly 40 years of being in this army,
I have learned to control my temper
and my voice when in the presence of a subordinate officer
who, for at least the time being, seems to have lost her goddamn mind.
Now, it is my understanding
that you have a question for me. Is that correct?
You are correct, sir.
Then when you are prepared to remember that you are still an officer
in the United States Army, in spite of your civilian attire,
and are ready to present that question in a military fashion,
then perhaps we could get somewhere with this discussion.
If you have sent an Alpha Team into Baghdad for any reason whatsoever,
that is a direct violation of a DOD order.
Well, and as much as you have this kind of knowledge,
I can't help wondering why it is that you need to ask anything of me.
I will take that as your confirmation, sir.
They go mobile in three hours.
The plates and over a billion dollars
will be loaded into the back of a semi at the mint.
They're overland for exactly 4.6 miles before they reach the bridge.
That's our window, and it closes fast.
These guys will go weapons hot at the first whisper of trouble.
Face, your point of entry is under the hotel.
It'll be packed with foreign press and private security.
B.A., you're in this alleyway on a stopwatch.
Make sure the bike has V-tins or better.
I got something a whole lot better than that.
- Bam! - What about me, boss man?
I had a little helicopter here someplace.
You got some barrel rolls? Some mid-air stalls?
I'm looking for my next near-death experience.
Only air support this time, Captain,
but I'll get you in on the next one. I promise.
B.A., I need you to pop that clutch at 0630.
Is that me?
Oh, no, I forgot. I'm in an Iraqi sewer. Thanks, boss!
Timing is everything, Face.
This is all about the bull's-eyes.
Why not?
From under the semi, you'll take out the truck directly behind you.
Huh?
Now, these guys are gonna be onto you, Face.
B.A., that's your cue for throttle.
Be sure to look both ways before crossing.
And have a nice full tank of gas.
You'll have multiple hostiles on board, B.A.
Escort them from the premises.
if any stragglers sneak up behind, don't worry, I got your back.
Gotcha, kid.
Attaboy.
That's all fine in theory, but I still don't see how we get out of Baghdad.
I do.
B.A.! Hang a right!
All right! Hang on!
- Watch out! Watch out! - Heads down!
Oh! Nice one, B.A.!
Face, get the airbags!
Gotta make sure this thing stays locked for later!
Beautiful!
One, two, three.
Hey, boss, airbags do deploy on impact, right?
B.A., get in the container.
Contact, rear!
Shit!
See, this is the part of the plan I don't trust!
Don't worry, Face! The rope will hold!
If I was worried, I'd be nailing myself to the container right now!
Hang on, boys!
Bam! Come on! I smoked you!
You boys see that down there?
Murdock? What is that fool doing here?
Don't lock me in here. I ain't playing with y'all!
Hey, boss, you ever play that game at the fun fair
where you try to pick up a stuffed animal with the claw?
This is a lot like that.
That's it!
Did you lock this?
You locked it, didn't you?
Hannibal, open this door right now, man!
What the... Are you hooking this thing?
- You hooking this up to a helicopter? - I got you.
What the hell's going on? You ain't that crazy!
Tell me we ain't flying! I'm gonna kill you, fool!
- Boss, is that Bosco? - Get me out of here!
- That's not good. - Let me out of here!
That's not good. He is not happy.
Agent Lynch, I'm patching surveillance
from the General's tent to you now.
Sir, I have an inbound V-22 tilt-rotor
on approach from the northwest.
Identified friendly. Landing under the General's orders.
Alpha Delta Alpha, stand down. Checked, friendly.
Those are our boys. D-block perimeter around LZ
for essential cargo touchdown.
Russ, we are in the net.
Copy that. I will be there in five.
I've got a big bottle of Blue Label waiting.
A bottle? Make it a case, Scrooge.
See you in a few.
Who's gonna let him out?
- You! - You!
What you don't realize is, now I gotta kill all of y'all!
I'll kill all of y'all! Hannibal first, then Murdock!
- Boss man. - I'm gonna save Face for last!
- Let me try something. - Go for it.
Is it weird that I'm more scared now than what we just did?
Bosco, it's Murdock.
Murdock, open this door!
I'll make you some of that coconut-curry tapenade that you love.
That might work.
With toast points?
Hell, yeah, with toast points. What, you're gonna have that
- with plain old chips? - Let's do this.
- Damn! You tricked me. - There he is.
- There he is! - I hate that!
- Come on! - Get away from me, man!
The only reason I don't kick y'all asses is 'cause you all outrank me.
You should know better! You know I hate flying!
- I'm wet! I stink! - Hoo! Yeah!
And I can't spend none of that money!
- Money can't buy happiness. - Damn, man!
Hey, Murdock, you cooking tonight. You better get your apron on.
I love it when a plan comes together.
- Hannibal, who was that? - General?
- Is that the General? - Russ.
- Get there. Get in there. - General!
- Russ! - General!
General!
Jesus Christ.
Pike.
Contact rear!
Get in there!
Get there, get there!
After conferring, we've decided to demote you
to the rank of First Lieutenant.
Lieutenant Sosa, it's nothing personal,
but you lost those plates.
Those were your responsibility.
Consider yourself lucky.
Others are going to prison over this.
Good day, Director McCready.
Lieutenant, you're dismissed.
Colonel Smith, this court has been unable to recover
any direct order from General Morrison for you to conduct the mission
for which you're being tried.
Your Honor, this was a covert operation
and no official orders were given.
So the one individual who can verify
the legitimacy of this operation is deceased. Is that correct, Colonel?
No, Your Honor, not deceased.
General Morrison was murdered.
Colonel, I've been around a long time.
I've seen units like yours. They're outlaws.
Units like that pose a direct threat
to the fabric and fundamentals of our military.
Your Honors, why hasn't Black Forest been brought to trial?
Black Forest and its personnel are not subject to military jurisdiction.
Where's the plan, boss? Where is it?
Where's the escape hatch? Because I don't see it.
- This mission isn't over, Lieutenant. - What mission?
I clear our names. We find Pike and the plates.
No matter what.
Your Honors, these men were acting under my command.
Any judgment should be levied against me, and me alone.
Absolutely not, sir.
We were all participating in this operation willingly.
I don't wanna be tried separately.
I refuse to be tried separately, sir.
In accordance with the Uniform Code of Military Justice,
this court is rendering guilty verdicts
for each member of this Alpha Unit, or A-Team,
and mandating incarceration in separate maximum-security facilities
for a period of up to 10 years.
You're all hereby stripped of formal rank
and dishonorably discharged.
This is bullshit, man.
This session is adjourned.
Disgraceful.
- Do not touch me, okay? - Captain, stand down.
Order! Order!
Absolute disgrace!
You happy? Are you happy, Charissa?
Colonel, control your men!
- Get your hands off me! - This is a disgrace!
Well, hello, Mr. Lynch. Long time.
You look very relaxed, Lynch.
A lot of cameras in here.
Yeah, there are.
Yeah, well, they seem to be having some technical issues at the moment.
May not show up till playback.
Hannibal. Can I call you Hannibal?
I can't call you Colonel anymore.
Six months.
Been waiting for you to bust out of here
and round up the rest of the Backstreet Boys
and lead me to those plates.
Six months and not a peep.
Everybody thought you and your team were working with Pike.
Mmm. Everybody except you.
Pike murdered Morrison. Set me and my boys up and stole those plates.
And I know where he is.
Nobody knows where he is.
It's a single image of him.
Taken about a month ago, somewhere in Europe.
We think it's a grab from a CCTV camera.
Frankfurt, Germany.
How did you get that in here?
Time, Lynch.
Give me a minute and I'm good.
If I've got an hour, I'm great.
You give me six months, I'm unbeatable.
I know Pike.
Who's the Arab?
We don't know.
We think he's the deep, dark, hidden hand in this whole thing.
Maybe a broker, maybe a buyer.
Lynch, we have common enemies and you have limited choices.
My team is still your best shot at getting those plates back.
I wouldn't be so sure.
Then why did you make the long drive out here?
You and your boys at Langley want your own private printing press.
That's about as deep as your patriotism goes.
So, what would you need from me?
I swore to my team that I would clear our names.
You of all people must understand the value of a name.
Now, listen.
I want full reinstatement and clean records
for myself and my team.
I can't get you out of here.
Not legally, at least.
This is something the boys at Langley do very, very well.
Make sure the dosage is right.
And when I say right, I mean perfect.
♪ Don't seem like happiness ♪ ♪ will come along. ♪
Cuban. What a shame.
♪ Everybody's throwing ♪ ♪ rocks in my bed ♪
♪ Just can't seem to ♪ ♪ get ahead in life. ♪
♪ Ooh, nothing I do ♪ ♪ ever turn out right. ♪
♪ Won't somebody help me, please? ♪
♪ 'Cause I've been ♪ ♪ lonely for so long. ♪
♪ Don't seem like happiness ♪ ♪ will come along ♪
♪ I've been lonely... ♪
You are not permitted
in my dojo!
So, Satan walks into this bar...
Wait a minute. What's this, a lap pool?
A dry steam room?
Yeah, it'll go a long way with the boys.
How in the hell do you pull this off?
It's not who you know, Bob, it's how you know them.
Oh! Did your boy get back from Afghanistan?
Yeah. Thanks for getting him home. His mother and I are real grateful.
- Captain. - Hey.
You left something on the bed.
- Could have hid those. - Why would I want to do that?
I'll see you at 8:00.
- And now you want to build... - A lap pool and a dry steam.
Overlooking a sundeck.
Hey, LT, thanks for the boots.
Ah! Come on. It's my pleasure, baby!
Beautiful.
Listen, now I know this is good for the body,
but how do you protect the face?
You don't mess with it, kid.
Gotcha.
- Thanks for the tan. - You got it.
McCREADY: Smith has escaped, Lieutenant.
Let me go after him.
Smith and his team were working with Brock Pike and Black Forest.
I can get those plates back for you, sir.
You know I can.
Holla what? Holla who?
Holla me.
Hey.
Hey! Let me out! Hey, hey! Hey!
I see him standing there, and I was like, "What?"
And then it turned black and I woke up, and my face was numb,
and I just...
And you mopped up the footprints that led out,
ignored the fact that your lab coat,
pass card, car keys and car were missing.
Looks like he ate Smith.
Gilbert, you've either deliberately
aided and abetted a federal fugitive's escape,
or you're the single dumbest human being I've ever come into contact with.
- You smell that? - Don't talk about it.
Would you like to know which way I'm leaning?
Forward.
I would test this man's urine, on the hour.
I was a week away from my parole hearing.
You are really tan.
Told you the mission wasn't over.
I'm putting the team back together.
I need you, Face. I can't do this without you.
Warden, how did Smith arrange a personal visit without your consent
or your signature? How does that happen?
How the hell did this guy do that?
Seal that up, nobody goes in there.
Log-in pages from the day in question have been removed.
- Why does that not surprise me? - Torn out.
The cigar was in the spine of that book.
- Subtle. It's a good book. - Right.
This is surveillance from all around the prison, right?
Mmm-hmm.
What you're watching is a signal jammer.
Every time he walks through one of these things,
we get massive interference. He waltzes in here and waltzes out.
Nobody knows who he is.
God.
Yes. The cigar that Colonel Smith broke out of prison with.
- Yeah. Wanna hear the crazy part? - Yes.
Lab reports show lethal amounts of, wait for it, tetrodotoxin.
Tetrodotoxin? What is that?
- The near-death drug. - Yes, that sleeping beauty thing.
Yeah. And you know who likes to use that, right?
- Who? - Our friends at Langley.
It's one of their favorites.
Come on, do you really think that the CIA came to the prison to visit Smith?
This sounds kind of crazy, but I think the CIA broke him out.
Who put us on?
The same guy that put us on in Baghdad. Lynch, CIA.
What are we talking about? Clean records? Reinstatements?
All of the above.
What about Pike and the plates?
Payback.
What are they exchanging? What is that?
Is that how he got this in here?
One of these things is not like the other.
I suck at these games.
Where's this plate from? What is that plate?
It's an "F." Frankfurt, Germany.
Oh, Frankfurt, Germany.
Smith is talking to us. This is not accidental.
With this guy, there's a plan and two to back it up.
I take it you didn't get religion inside.
No. I got revenge.
Good.
I know a couple of guys that'll feel the exact same way.
I'm counting on it.
Emergency exit now.
Hannibal.
Baracus, don't do it!
Where he going? What's he doing, man?
Baracus! God damn it!
Sosa.
McCREADY: Lieutenant, Peck's already gone.
What?
Baracus and Murdock are left. Handle it, Lieutenant.
Right. Okay.
I don't want to be embarrassed like this again. Do you?
Okay. No, no, no, no. We're gonna catch and deploy from here.
Peck escaped.
- Oh, hell. You think Smith is involved? - Definitely.
Get graphics on him and Smith. Anything that'll ID them instantly.
I know they got Murdock in a psych ward in Mannheim.
Right. Okay. Where the hell is B.A. Baracus?
How did you know that once that door was extracted
- that it would take his weight? - I just did. He's...
- You know, he's what, 225, 230 pounds? - 230. Yeah.
Remember the gag we did in Venezuela seven years ago?
Venezuela. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But that was a midget.
Yeah, I wouldn't go for that.
- Hey, big guy. There he is. - Yeah! He's back.
- Yeah, it's good to be back. - Come on.
- It's good to be back. - My man.
- It's good to see you, bud. - You, too, bro. You, too.
- Thanks. - You look well.
It's good to see you guys.
- What? - Where's the Mohawk?
What, you don't like my new do, man?
Do I like it? Well, we got you the clippers. I thought...
Yeah, I used them.
Hey. What's up, big guy?
Come on, you can speak to us.
Guys...
I can't kill anybody.
- What do you mean? - I've taken a vow.
- Vow? - Of non-violence.
I'll still do anything for you guys, you know that.
But I just can't kill, man.
Old habits may die hard,
but they still gotta die.
When I was a kid, all you heard in the hood was,
"Bosco's a badass, out collecting scalps."
That's where the Mohawk came from.
Was always at war.
And that's what warriors are for.
Hannibal, man. I don't miss that life.
I'll help you get Murdock, and right that wrong,
- but I can't kill. - Even Pike?
Even if killing him would clear your name?
My conscience is the only thing I need clear.
Now, where's that crazy-ass fool?
Transference.
Healing feelings.
You can't warehouse these things, you know?
You have to express to progress.
We gotta empower your emotional tower
and send out a wavelength of self-love and acceptance.
Thank you.
Clear.
He seems completely impervious to it. It's impossible to develop a base reading.
Have you increased the voltage?
Every single session, yes.
- Healing feelings, baby. - And?
Is that all you got? Here we go.
Clear.
Yee-ha!
Yeah, I think I might have felt something there.
♪ Oh, no, I won't sleep. ♪
Howard Little.
You have a package here from an Annabelle Smith.
I don't know any Annabelle Smith.
Sure you do, Howie.
Sure you do, baby. Annabelle.
Remember the nurse from Da Nang? The redhead, double amputee?
Professional hang glider? Yes!
Guys.
Annabelle.
Yeah. Yeah.
Annabelle.
Annabelle. You have outdone yourself. Look at this.
- It's so real. - Beauty.
A movie in three dimensions.
Stand-to, soldier.
- Jerries advancing on the western front. - Good heavens.
Got a secret mission for you.
Take these and distribute them amongst the men.
- Yes, sir. - Don't fail the Queen.
- No, sir. - Great.
Yes, sir.
Movie, movie, movie...
I knight you.
Sir, you have to put your head down. Stand up and do it again.
Movie, movie...
Now let's sing to the Queen. When I ask you... Not yet.
- Movie, movie... - Movie, movie...
You get glasses! You get glasses!
Ball!
When you kneel, you put your head down straightaway.
Looking me in the eye is disrespectful. Do you understand?
Movie, movie...
You're looking me in the eye now. That's wrong.
Movie, movie, movie...
Aquaman? Hello.
You get glasses! You get glasses!
Rise, Sir 3D, and enjoy your motion picture.
- Movie! Movie! - Movie! Movie!
Boy, could I use two hours of not this.
Pass out the sedatives and order some pizzas for these freaks.
- Movie, movie... - Movie, movie...
Movie...
Shit.
Excuse me, can I help you with something?
Yes. Captain Murdock, where is he?
- Right through there. - Thank you.
El diablo.
Okay. Settle down.
No talking during the movie.
Down in front!
Look, it's 3D, man!
I'm sick of 3D.
Captain Murdock.
You remember me from Baghdad?
Okay, this is pointless. This guy is fried.
Yeah, there's a reason why he's in here.
And his entire team has escaped, except him.
Movie!
Take a look around anyway. Let's make sure he's alone.
Yes, ma'am.
Oh, Captain, your chariot awaits.
Sorry, boys, gotta run! Can't finish the movie.
Do let me know how it ends.
Charissa, where are you hiding? Stay beautiful, baby.
- Punch it, B.A. - Let's go, fool.
Get the truck!
She's actually shooting at us.
You guys should see these bullets in 3D!
- Murdock, get in here! - It's like we're actually being shot at!
You are getting shot at, you crazy-ass fool!
- Stop right there! - Ram it.
Hey! I said halt!
Damn! Sorry, dude.
It looks like they're headed for the tarmac.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
- Gentlemen. - Holy shit, that's Hannibal Smith.
Are any of you armed and/or wanted federal fugitives?
- No. - Well, we're both.
- Which means... - This is a bad idea.
This is a bad idea.
Stop being a baby. You're a grown-ass man. Get on the plane.
- You're taking the plane? - And that's why I joined the Army.
We gotta finish the escape. Man up and get in there.
The best and brightest. Appreciate it, boys. That'll be all.
Who's got the keys? I just need your keys.
What you talking about keys? You don't need no keys for no plane.
- I do need keys. - For what?
This is a bad idea. We just broke this guy out of a psych ward.
Hannibal, you let the real pilots go.
- B.A., relax. You're gonna be fine. - Take one of these.
What is this? Will it knock me out? It better knock me out,
'cause if it don't, I'm gonna knock you out.
Bosco, the buttons are confusing me.
- Shut up, Murdock. - Come on, Murdock. Let's go.
You gonna fly this plane? Forget it. I'll turn myself in.
- What does this do? - Come on.
- Come on, Murdock. - I got lucky.
Hang on, boys.
Stop. Stop, stop, stop.
Face, your girlfriend is back.
- Reverse now. - Son of a bitch!
Move your ass now.
- The C-130 versus the Mercedes-Benz. - Lift us off, Murdock.
- How about faster? - Faster!
I'm trying. I got it pinned!
Oh, my God!
Get us to flight control.
Ladies and gentlemen, we are expecting slight turbulence.
Please remain in your seats until the captain has turned off
the "Fasten Seatbelt" sign.
Don't worry, boys! Turbulence has never brought down a plane!
What the hell is that?
But we got inbound subsonic UAVs with missile lock!
And they bring down planes all the time!
Okay, they're coming in. Launching countermeasures!
Whoa!
Did you see that? That's my diversion!
They die on this version.
Hang on! Hang on! Hold on! We're going over.
Murdock, what the hell are you doing?
You boys remember Mexico?
Whoa!
Ladies and gentlemen, from the flight deck,
if you look out of the right-hand side of the aircraft, you'll notice
that your right wing is on fire.
Tango reacquired. Missile lock pending, sir.
Lieutenant Charissa Sosa, DCIS. Major, do not shoot that aircraft down.
Scramble fighters and force them to land.
There are federal fugitives on that plane.
They've also stolen property from the U.S. Army.
Billy, Billy, I need you to get the nose-cam view up here on my monitor now.
It's up, sir. Here it is.
Missile away, sir.
We have shoot-down. Hercules has been intercepted and destroyed.
Sorry, Lieutenant. I'm sorry.
- I don't believe it. - We have chute deployment on the Buford.
What?
I want these drones taken offline right now!
- They're 3,000 miles away. - Whoever is running those drones.
Get me a direct line to whoever is running those drones.
We gotta get these drones to stand down or I'm gonna be on bitch duty.
I need to get those men alive!
Everybody okay?
What are the chances they think we're dead?
Not great.
- Tell me we ain't still on that plane. - We ain't on that plane.
- Hannibal! - Yeah?
If we're under 20,000 feet, we can still breathe, right?
What are you talking about, 20,000 feet?
- Let's fire up the old weapons system. - What the hell, man?
Hey, Bosco, a little stuffy. I'm gonna pop a window!
Yeah!
What you got, bitches? What you got?
Yeah!
Let me have a turn, Face! Come on!
- Why are we in a falling tank? - Because the plane exploded!
What... What? When?
Recently!
- The Reapers shot it down! - What Reapers?
The same ones that are still trying to kill us!
- I blame you, Hannibal! - Technically, we're not flying.
I know! Because we're falling, fool!
Oh, Jesus!
UAV-2 has splashed down. We just lost one of the drones.
Hannibal, we're in trouble!
Brace yourselves!
Awesome!
Face, get on to the main gun!
There's a lake a half-mile away from this position.
- What the hell am I trying to hit? - Trust me!
- Rotate the turret 82 degrees. - Fire in the hole!
- Fire! - Boom!
Fire!
Are they trying to shoot down that other drone?
No. They're trying to fly that tank.
- He's flying the tank! - You can't fly a tank, fool!
- Rotate 16 degrees! - Got it!
Fire!
Rotate 34 degrees now!
- Hannibal... - Wait...
Fire!
- Control, we have lost... - Is that a confirmed hit?
Bring turret full-front and wait!
Murdock! Close the hatch!
Hatch, okay! Did that work? Did that work?
- Boss! - Come on, baby.
- Come on. - Hatch control?
I'm too young to die!
Boss! I'm aiming at nothing!
Come on.
- it's been an honor, gentlemen. - Come on, baby.
The greatest ride is the last ride, Colonel!
- Fire everything! - Come on, baby!
- Get right with God, y'all! This is it! - Come on!
Yee-ha!
it's not fair to the fish!
You're cheating!
You with your nagging...
...you're chasing them away!
All right. Busy bees, busy bees.
Guys, you can take your coats off. Hot as hell in here.
I'm sweating like a whore in church.
- Sir. - Yeah?
Smith and his team were engaged in a C-130 over Mannheim, Germany,
by two Reaper drones.
I'm not sure if it's an encryption glitch,
but it says that they were shot down in a tank.
NORAD's calling it an X-out, but there is a conflicting report.
I'm sure there is.
I've got a German Hausfrau who says she saw a tank
drive up and out of Lake Wolgastsee with a guy resembling Murdock...
Excuse me, which way to Berlin?
- ...asking for directions to Berlin. - That's impossible.
Well, this will be the second time Smith has died this week.
Is that possible?
- What have you got for me? - Look at this.
We just got the unscrambled composite of Smith's visitor in prison,
but with no lD on the subject yet.
Hello, handsome.
Wait, I've seen this person before.
I know this guy.
Baghdad.
Get me a clean patch to Langley. We're going fishing.
I barely even heard about it.
I mean, I heard bits and pieces of it, but how much of that was us?
- So, I have a... - I was talking.
- It's never us. - Can you stop?
I have a DOD hardline from Lieutenant Sosa.
She's looking for Agent Lynch.
He's not available, ever.
Agent Lynch, from Baghdad?
General Morrison's tent?
Out.
Why do we have her?
She's got a fantastic personality. That's why.
With whom am I speaking?
This is Captain... Lieutenant Sosa. Is this Agent Lynch?
I'm sorry, I don't have a first name.
Neither do I. So, what can I do you for, Lieutenant?
I'm looking at an image of you
from the disciplinary barracks at Fort Carson.
She's hot.
Did you visit former Colonel Hannibal Smith in prison?
I don't know what you're talking about, former Captain.
Agent Lynch, if you facilitated Smith's escape
and are currently aiding and abetting him...
Ooh. Buddy.
If you can make something like that stick,
your next promotion should be in the five-star range.
And if you're helping to retrieve those engraving plates,
I'm going to have to go out of my way to disappoint you.
I want her phones, her computers, any support packages she operates.
I wanna know everything. I want active intercept taps on everything she's got.
I want every move monitored from this moment forward.
You realize she's DOD.
I don't care if she's G-O-D. Do it.
Boss, check this out.
We've tracked this photograph of Pike to the Königsbank in Frankfurt.
Our surveillance has him and an unknown Arab
making regular trips from the train station to the bank
all over the last month.
- Pike's getting sloppy. - Yeah, but if we're onto him,
what are the odds that Smith and his team are onto Pike and the Arab, too?
No, no, no, this is a direct pull-down from the Pentagon's database.
There's absolutely no way Smith and his team could have this stuff.
I think we should assume they have more information than us at all times.
Pike has been moving the stolen engraving plates
to the Königsbank Tower in Frankfurt over the past month.
Tomorrow, the last of the cases containing these plates
will be transferred to the Arab.
This will mark the only time in the last six months
that all of the plates have been in one location.
It's our best and only shot at getting them back.
They leave the Königsbank Tower for the 7:15 train to Zürich.
Gentlemen, we're gonna make sure they miss that train.
- Face? - Yeah.
Time to bring in your former flame.
If she's as good as I think,
then she'll be on her way to Frankfurt to intercept those plates.
- Why would you tip her off? - She's a crusader,
and we're gonna need her teed up at some point.
Keep your eyes and ears open, boys.
Charissa Sosa...
Charissa Sosa...
Now the wrinkle.
If Sosa's onto us, we can assume that Lynch is onto her.
And if he thinks she stands beteen him and those plates,
he won't hesitate to kill her.
Face, get to the train station.
This is Sosa.
if there's a threat from Lynch, deal with it.
Hello?
Shoot is green. Say again, shoot is green.
Hello?
Something's wrong.
We're marked, guys. Pull back. I don't like this at all.
See. Don't be seen.
- Hello, beautiful. - You have got some balls.
- You put a drop phone on me? - I had to, babe.
It's the only way I could talk to you. Lynch has all your comm lines.
- I want you to pull your team now. - I'm gonna find you, Face.
But do not engage her or anyone else directly.
Not if I find you first.
Come on, all right... Okay. Okay.
Ow! Ow! Jesus!
- What the hell are you doing? - Trying to save you!
Charissa.
Come on, you know we're innocent. You know this.
You're lying. Like you lied in Baghdad.
I did not know. I knew nothing about the plates.
At that... At that time.
You are completely full of shit!
Will you stop selling yourself on that
and avoiding the fact that you lied to me!
- You're the one that misled me. - When?
- Come on. You wanna go there? - Yeah, let's go there.
You heard I was a player and you wanted to play.
And then I got serious and you freaked!
- Oh, I freaked? I did not freak! - Yes, you did.
You panicked and you ran.
Charissa, come on.
I'm a federal fugitive. You know exactly how wanted I am.
You think I came to Frankfurt to hash out some old heartbreak? No!
I'm here because we didn't do this. I'm here because we were set up.
I'm here because, in the end, the truth is worth the risk.
And I believe in you, even if you don't believe in me.
God, I forgot how beautiful you are.
Hold on to that phone.
OH MY GOD!
HE'S GOT A GUN!
RIGHT THERE! HE'S GOT A GUN!
A GUN!
Sucker.
- Oh, shit. - Where's Peck?
Excellent question. Find him!
Please stay calm and go to the nearest exit.
Meet you up on corridor three.
Three to base. We're all clear at this time.
Give me confirmation as soon as the package is secure.
We need a video feed.
Okay, let's dance.
Coming down. Positions, prepare to move.
As always, stay close to me, sir.
Closing off the 10th floor.
Tenth floor, we need backup.
Get back! Get back!
I can't see anything.
How we doing there, big man?
Murdock, here comes the Arab.
And here's a long drive
hit deep into left center field.
Murdock's back, he's at the wall, and he makes the catch!
I can't breathe.
it's a trap!
Pete, we need backup!
B.A., I lost the case.
I'm taking fire. I'm out of here.
B.A., get to those plates.
Deutsche Federal is responding to explosions and shots fired
- at the Königsbank building. - Get us out of this mess and get us
- to that building as soon as possible. - Yes, ma'am.
You made me work for this one, Baracus.
I didn't think I was this out of shape.
I am, unfortunately.
Where's the rest of the team, huh?
Smith. Peck. That idiot pilot, the asshole. What's his name?
I'm gonna take this one out of your ass, Baracus. Let's see what you got.
Come on. What are you doing? What, are you tired?
I'm not gonna hurt you, man.
No, you're not gonna hurt me, I'm gonna hurt you.
- I don't wanna kill you, man. - You don't wanna kill me?
You're not gonna kill me. I'm gonna kill you, Baracus.
I'm not playing with you, Pike.
Here we go, because I got two guns. I'm a lefty, remember that, right?
So, as soon as that hammer goes back, it's on.
I swear to God, I'll do it.
You're not a coward, are you?
Are you?
Whoopsy.
Damn!
- Need a ride, big fella? - You're a life-saver, man.
I couldn't shoot him.
Get out of the way! Get down! Get down!
U.S. Military! Put them down. Put them down.
This is U.S. Military. We got him.
Yeah, this is about the right amount of cops.
That's cute. You're lucky there are people around.
No, sweetheart, you're lucky.
You eat that cold?
Any way I can get it.
There's a leak in the roof.
There's a lot of them.
- Is that them? - I got it.
All right. Not a peep out of the Arab.
Sosa was at the train station.
- You saw her? - Yeah.
Did you talk to her?
I had no choice, okay? Just trust me on that.
I trust you to make historically bad decisions
as far as women are concerned.
What part of you is thinking at the moment?
Lynch's men moved in on her and I had to react.
That's why you wanted me there in the first place...
To stop them! Not to engage her!
I couldn't do one without the other.
Please. Somehow I doubt that.
Hey. What are you so pissed about? We got the plates.
You wanted her teed up. She's teed up.
She knows we didn't steal them.
She'll be thrilled to find out who did.
What?
You had to know.
You had to know if you left me alive, that this was coming.
How could you not?
You taught me almost everything I know.
Hannibal. You know who this is?
We all do.
Morrison?
Hell, no.
Jesus Christ.
Not so sure that it is a blessing, but good hunting, my friend.
Thank you.
You son of a bitch.
Morrison? Holy shit.
You're not a general.
How could you do this to him?
How could you do this to us?
You know nothing about leading men.
I knew if Lynch helped me escape, you had to be part of it.
You and Pike were making a play on those plates with Lynch,
and you turned on him.
The way you turned on us.
Lynch was never gonna cut us in.
He was gonna use us.
He brought you on as insurance.
He never thought you'd betray your oldest living friend.
I just hit first, Hannibal. I'm a fighting man.
You're a liar and a traitor!
Then don't draw this out. Kill me.
That's a fantastic idea!
Whoa! Whoa!
Bos, let me do this.
Face, I ain't killing nobody.
You're not, Bosco. I am.
No matter what he says, do not kill him, okay?
You guys don't wanna watch? Just turn your heads.
- I'm not gonna be party to it neither. - I wanna kill the son of a bitch, too,
but he's our ticket out.
He knows what he's talking about for once. Listen to him.
- Face, he is our only evidence. - Murdock, Murdock...
- Do you understand? - He put us here.
You can blow his head off after he testifies, okay?
He's ruined it!
- Think what you're doing, Face. - All right.
- If you can't handle it... - Boys, enough.
Enough! That's enough, Face.
Enough! Step down!
Everybody outside.
I got him.
- I don't want you to have to do it. - Face, outside.
Stand down, soldier.
Face. Now!
- Fucking stupid. - You okay, man?
You knew Morrison was masquerading as the Arab.
- Why not share that? - I wasn't 100% sure.
How about 99%?
Would you think it was worth mentioning then?
Lynch, what did you think?
You think I'd just kill him on the spot?
I was certain of it. I still am.
Do you have the plates?
I wouldn't be calling you if I didn't.
Smith, return the plates, kill Morrison, and reclaim your lives.
I want signed and authorized amnesty agreements
for myself and for each of my men.
From the White House, the State Department
and the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
You hear me?
I'm gonna need a little more time.
How much?
Give me five minutes.
I'm waiting.
Don't you get it, Hannibal?
We fight for them, we bleed for them, we die for them...
They don't give a rat's ass.
Death and destruction,
they're selling it like it was on the goddamn commodities exchange.
Don't push this off on them. This is not about them.
Your war protest was stealing billions of dollars!
Who are you?
I am a general. You are a colonel.
I say, "Jump," and you say, "How high?" End of story.
It is now.
I saw your tomb at Arlington.
You died a national hero.
Death's too easy.
And the last thing we need now is another lie.
Don't do this. Hannibal, please. You owe me that much.
You owe me!
You're gonna tell them we're innocent.
You owe me.
Hannibal, it's meaningless.
What are you fighting for now, you and those boys?
Your ranks? Your reputations?
They're shit!
You're convicts!
Plates, no plates, you are federal fugitives,
and when they're done with you, Hannibal, they just fucking burn you.
Zulu one, Zulu one, this is Broadsword, you're clear to engage.
"Broadsword." Did you come up with that?
That's awesome. "Broadsword."
"Broadsword."
Boss, could you do that?
To us?
What Morrison did?
No. Not in a million years.
Yeah, but you didn't see it coming, though.
How long did you know it was him?
Are you guys crazy?
I know you are, but, Face, are you accusing him?
Hey! Hey!
I'd rather face a firing squad than betray you boys.
Don't let this tear us apart.
Not now.
Not when we need each other like no other time before.
Move!
Wow. That's awesome.
That looks exactly like Call of Duty, doesn't it?
All right. Here's the deal. No press release.
Keep local law enforcement and media off-site.
Get a three-mile cordon, ditto the no-fly zone.
Get an agency scrub team out there and get me the goddamn plates back.
The German police have your entire team in custody in the Königsbank Tower.
I don't do teams, babe. That's Smith's bag. I'm strictly a solo act.
I like to travel light.
Stuff like loyalty doesn't fit in the overhead bins.
I thought you and Smith were working together.
You thought wrong.
Yes, we have weapons. No, you may not wand us.
if you want to deal, we can deal.
How about I dedicate my immediate future
to destroying yours?
How about you get smart and start dealing
before somebody else does?
Former Captain.
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Unless you've got a piece of paper that looks exactly like this one,
then this troubled young loner belongs to me.
Let's go.
How the hell did they get an extradition order?
Sorry, Pike. At least with me, there are rules.
CIA's got rules. Our rules are just cooler than yours.
- Go. - You know, Lynch,
if I could seal this room with you inside, I'd be doing the world a big favor.
That's not nice.
- Lynch? - Had to be.
Stay close to the fires, boys.
If that gunship is still around, it won't read our body heat.
That idiot Lynch, so quick to kill us, didn't even bother locating the plates.
Where do we stand on the non-violence now, B.A.?
You pissed? You should be.
Who gives a shit about the plates? Morrison was the only way to clear us.
And without Morrison, we got nothing.
- What do we do, boss? - I don't know, Murdock.
- I don't know. - I do.
This guy Lynch, I think I got him figured out.
- You got a plan, kid? - How do we get out of here?
Give me 20 minutes.
So, Morrison's dead. Smith and his team are dead.
Another 15 minutes or so, we locate those engraving plates.
What is this? Are you gloating?
No, this is me beating you after you burned me.
- We had a deal, remember? - Not you and me.
- You, me and Morrison. - Not you and me, directly.
And you two collude and cut me out.
Hey. What are you doing? In the car?
Are we doing... Are we gonna do this in the car?
- You doing this? - He's gonna do it.
Way to go. That's brilliant, right there.
What are you doing? What is he doing?
- Jesus. - How's it going, Kyle?
- You all right? - I'm good.
Brother, you are far from good. What are you doing?
It's a European silencer.
It's a suppressor. Counter-clockwise. You're holding a gun like that?
You've held a gun like that before and you're still here?
That's amazing.
- Don't point that thing... - Jesus. Final request,
don't let this guy shoot me, please.
So, if Sosa knows we're alive...
She'll believe Morrison is alive, too.
Let's just hope that Lynch still has Sosa's comm lines.
This is Sosa.
General Morrison is in my possession.
What? I'm sorry. I can't hear you. Who is this?
- Okay, this was not well thought out. - No shit.
I mean, look at this. Am I to teach you how to kill me?
Hey, do me a favor, all right? Put the barrel...
Put the gun flush to my head.
- Are you sure? - There you go, right there.
- Is that going to go through? - Before you hurt somebody besides me.
There you go. We're okay. We're okay.
Never cuff a man in a seated position with his hands behind his back.
Makes it impossible to see the hands.
That was cool.
- You like that? - I like that.
I like that a lot.
Are you all right, you idiot?
- Yeah. It was a good hit. - Please handcuff him.
We don't need to use them again. We don't need the cuffs.
Who are you talking to?
- Brad, phone or gun. - Jesus.
- Phone or gun. Pick. - Hey, hey.
- Put the gun down. - Hey, I didn't burn you. Morrison did.
I really wanna shoot you.
You gotta hear this, sir.
Is this Smith?
From a former colonel to a former captain,
I know I've got about 30 seconds before you lock this signal.
- So listen, we can prove our innocence. - Leave that on the floor like that?
Okay. All right. Now, go back.
Did you say you have Morrison? You have General Morrison?
- Correct. - You have him alive?
And well, despite Lynch trying to wipe us out wholesale.
Too much to explain now but Morrison's testimony frees us
and fries Lynch.
Uh-oh.
Well, not without the plates.
Also in my possession.
Remember, Lynch thinks we're dead, and I want to keep it that way.
- All right. We'll deal. - Give me a pen.
- Where and when? - Got a pen? Anybody got a pen?
- LA docks, 48 hours, dawn. - You still use a pen?
I deliver Morrison and the plates.
In return, I want a retrial in front of a civilian court.
All right. We'll deal.
LA docks, 48 hours from now.
Any bullshit from your end, and that's it, deal's off.
- Did we get him? - No.
Pike.
You believe in second chances?
Uh...
I do now.
Too much?
I thought you were spot-on.
My turn.
Hold on to that phone.
This is Sosa.
Hello, beautiful.
Thank you.
They got the raw end of the deal, didn't they? Look at B.A.
He looks like a huge banana.
Good morning, my friend.
Good morning.
Rabbi Binky Rabinowitz?
What passport did I give you?
You're from Tanzania. My mother is from Tanzania.
- Oh, shit. - What the hell happened?
- ...converting Africans to Judaism. - This is station six...
Stuff like that.
Let's get ready to move. There's three to my right.
There's two behind me and one at the northeast exit.
Wait a sec.
Shalom.
- What's he doing? - It's Murdock. Telling his life story.
There is a God.
- You speak Swahili? - You don't?
You got enough to work with, kid?
We will.
You and I have some major favors moving across the mid-Atlantic right now.
It's a deep-sea freighter, shipping strictly black-market merch.
How do we get out to her?
A boat. A plain old boat.
This is what I'm talking about, Murdock. Traveling the open seas in style.
This is the way I like to travel. Classy-like. The way people used to, safe.
- Yeah... - We don't need a plane.
You know, Bosco, hopefully one day we'll get you over your fear of flying.
What?
Hey, that ain't a boat!
Just not today.
Murdock, don't you remember what I said?
- I said you have to catch him... - You have to catch him...
- ...after you inject him. - ...after you inject him.
My bad.
Damn it! My head, man.
- Coconut-curry tapenade, your favorite. - Give me that, fool.
You get them toast points?
Voilà. Toast points.
Y'all knocked me out again, huh?
Okay, now, the whole injection, knocking out,
Hannibal and Face.
The curry tapenade, Murdock.
Why do I feel like I fell on my face?
Huh? Tell me that.
Uh...
Lynch is a paradox.
Murdock, you done with that?
This is a guy who needs anonymity, but he loves theatricality.
He's an administrator, he's not an operator.
Where is it?
Very nice.
So he stays as far away from the point of impact as possible,
and never gets his hands dirty if he can help it.
But we're gonna change all that.
You can't hustle a hustler, fool.
No sparks, no flames, not even a flashlight near this stuff.
Easy, easy.
This guy is never at the flashpoint of anything.
He's safe and sound somewhere, pulling the strings.
Mama. Mama.
Hey, boss. Why so many of these damn things anyway?
Because overkill is underrated, my friend.
So we're gonna bring this guy down to ground level.
Mama. Mama.
This way, Lynch. Lynch.
The last place he'd ever want to be.
Then you put him on display for the whole world to see.
Any questions?
What's up, boss man?
Hey, B.A.
it's gonna get heavy, isn't it?
Well, I can't promise you it won't.
Let me read you something real quick.
"Victory attained by violence is tantamount to defeat,"
"for it is momentary."
Gandhi.
"It is better to be violent if there is violence in our hearts,"
"than to put on the cloak of non-violence to cover impotence."
Who said that?
Same guy.
Gandhi wasn't afraid to fight for the things he believed in.
What is it you believe in, B.A.?
♪ Forlife is but an opera ♪
it's off, isn't it?
I think it's higher.
No, it's good. It's not that, Murdock.
Face, what's wrong? Come on, man.
I don't know, man. I'm just thinking past this.
You know, we've always come back alive,
the four of us, 'cause of the old man.
- I know. - I'm not him.
Face, I know this.
Murdock, I'm not Hannibal.
Who has the most to lose on this, Face?
Me.
And I trust you.
Yeah, I know,
but you're crazy.
Not that crazy.
Our eagles may have landed.
Everybody ready to roll?
Copy Team one on the move.
Acknowledged. Team to en route.
All right, guys, everybody ready?
Curtain's about to come up.
Show time.
That's Smith right there. Watch him.
Ground team is in position?
Standing by.
In position.
Shoot Team One. Affirmative.
Spotter One. 10-8.
Let's chattermark on comms for now.
Morrison's the primary tango. Plates are the package.
Yeah.
Okay, okay, he's talking to Sosa. I want this call.
You lied to me, Sosa. We had a deal.
I want that goddamn call in my... Thank you.
We had a deal, but I'm changing the deal.
Are you kidding me, Sosa? Are you kidding me?
This is a complicated exchange and you have no play here.
Listen, or remain at-large fugitives
- for the foreseeable future. - Uh-oh. No! No, no.
For God sakes, I've got Morrison here and the plates.
I'm exposed, Sosa. Exposed!
We're not doing this on the docks.
Now listen to me, we're not turning ourselves in.
Now you listen to me, we're not turning ourselves in.
I need you to do it on my terms or nothing at all.
To hell with that, and to hell with you, Sosa!
Ah. She burned him.
Face, B.A., we're bugging out. Sosa's jammed us.
Murdock, get the chopper down here in 10.
Okay, he's moving him.
You got him? He's moving him.
For the love of God, relax.
I am relaxed. He's moving him.
Don't do this. Hannibal, please.
- That's Morrison, right there. Take him. - Wait, does he have the plates?
Smith has the plates. Go now.
- Take him, he's right there. Kill him. - I've got Morrison, taking a shot.
A little too close for comfort, kid.
What just happened?
What the hell is he doing?
Where are they? Somebody talk to me.
Come on, did that thing crush them or what?
This was a hell of a lot easier when it was just three plastic cups.
Everybody just be cool. Pay attention. No hasty moves.
So, you beat a guy like Lynch by drawing him in with three things.
What the hell are they doing?
Distraction.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! What is happening?
Diversion.
This is a diversion! Stay eagle on those containers.
They're breaking for the exits! Open fire!
Do not engage! Back off!
Ground teams, engage!
Holy shit!
Ground team, re-engage.
You are being played by Smith.
He's trying to draw your eye line, Lynch. Come on, be smart.
Take them! Take them! Take them! Take them!
Contact! Tower house and bow! It's Peck and Baracus!
And division.
It's a trap! Pull back! Pull back!
- Get the hell out of there! - No, no, no.
What is happening? What is going on?
Nice one, kid.
it's Peck and Baracus!
- Shoot them! - Shut up! I know what I'm doing.
Okay, paintballers, time to go pro.
B.A., get to your secondary position.
Okay. Game-changer.
Here's what I think of your best-laid plans.
Shit!
Jesus Christ!
So much for the grand scheme, Smith.
What the hell was that?
Face, what the hell was that?
Pike hit the ship with a SMAW! He punched a hole in the hull!
What about the plan?
Pike just blew up the plan! We are ad-libbing!
Bosco, get out of there!
I'm going for Hannibal.
- Cover me. I'm going for those plates. - Yes, sir.
The boat is going over! Get out of there!
Bos, hang on!
Oh! Jeez!
Shit.
Bosco, Pike's got the high ground. I'm running low on ammo, man.
Shit!
How are you doing, handsome?
Shit, can you cycle that weapon. Nice work.
Jeez, close friends and bullets.
Where are they when you need them?
Don't take this too personally, but look here,
smile, wait for the flash.
Baracus.
Bosco!
Lynch.
Lynch.
Come on, Lynch.
Lynch.
Come on, Smith! Stop bullshitting.
Lynch. Come on, Lynch.
Lynch...
Where am I?
Come on, Lynch.
Lynch.
Where am I, Lynch?
Come on, Lynch.
Lynch, Lynch, Lynch, Lynch.
Lynch!
There you are, Hannibal. Been looking all over for you.
Hey, don't let the scarf fool you.
My muay Thai is pretty good. My jujitsu is a little better, but...
You had this whole sleight-of-hand thing going with the containers
and the cars, and the fireworks. "Lynch, Lynch, Lynch!"
God, that's annoying. But you give Pike a rocket.
There's your monkey wrench.
Hannibal, don't do this.
You know, Smith, you could have the best recipe in the world...
- You owe me that much. - ...but you drop a few bullets
- into the batter... - Hannibal, don't do this.
- Lynch, no! - Hannibal, please.
Oh, God.
...and that cake don't bake.
Uh-oh. Your witness, your gun, your problem.
You served your country well. Excuse me.
Hello, Ben, where have you been all my life?
Look at us, Hannibal. Couple of grown men.
I'm bleeding. You're bleeding.
Don't get up.
God damn it!
Your muay Thai is as bad as your jujitsu, Lynch.
Better stick with a gun.
You put a loaded weapon in my hand, I'll put a bullet in your head.
I told you I would shoot you.
Kevlar saved your life.
Thing is, it doesn't do much good if I pop you in the head.
It does if you melt it down.
Hannibal, don't do this.
- Hannibal, please. - So, you beat a guy like that
by drawing him in with three things.
- Distraction. - Whoa, whoa, whoa! What is happening?
Diversion.
And division.
Hannibal, don't leave me alive.
Then you put him on display for the whole world to see.
What the...
That's good.
Surprise.
Agent Burress.
What did you call me?
Agent Vance Burress? Isn't that your name?
At least that's the name I've got on this warrant here,
and unless you have a piece of paper that looks exactly like...
That's funny. That's what I said.
She's quoting me.
Easy, easy.
You're under arrest for attempted murder,
violations of the Civil False Claims Act,
and the theft of top secret government engraving plates.
Easy.
I guess the plan went okay,
considering Pike did blow up the boat, which I didn't account for at all.
Bullets didn't go through.
Hannibal, don't do this. Hannibal, please.
How are you feeling, man?
Not... Not good.
- What's wrong? - Not good.
I feel sane.
I should have shot you in the head a long time ago.
Is it crazy that I'm feeling your anxiety right now?
Do I look anxious to you?
You think I'm beaten?
I'm bleeding, I'm not sweating.
Let's take him out of here, guys. Go ahead, princess.
What's the difference between a concussion and a contusion?
- It don't matter, bro. You tore up. - Murdock, that was beautiful.
You were right. The helmet worked.
Ketchup worked great.
You did a great job. You okay?
- Yeah. - Got your bell rung?
Just let Hannibal make the plans next time.
- Oh. Okay. - Okay?
How's the conscience, big guy?
At peace.
Keep it turning.
We already got them on the exits.
- We got a two-mile no-fly zone here. - Which one of you is Sosa?
- I am. I am. - I need to talk to Sosa.
As of right now your prisoner is to be remanded
- into federal custody. - I have a warrant for this man.
- As of right now... - I'll tell you what... I'm a doc.
Let me doctor you up. Let me help you out.
Do you need stitches? Please tell me you need stitches.
I can stitch you up really good.
Gentlemen.
The Central intelligence Agency
believes in and evinces a profound moral ethic,
as well as an unshakeable professional standard.
As such, we would like to extend our most sincere apologies
for what's happened here.
- Good day and God bless. - Where are you taking him?
Who?
I never got your name.
My name is Lynch.
Of course it is.
Did he just say Lynch?
Let it go.
Hey. Do not touch me.
Take it easy, guys.
Everybody, stand down! Stand down!
- Get those plates. - Everybody, stand down!
- That's an order. Hey, you, stand down. - What is wrong with you?
Lieutenant.
Sir, when did you arrive? I had no idea...
- Just give me a minute. - Yes, sir.
Get your hands off me, tough guy.
Well, that's one hell of a mess. But we did get the plates.
Unfortunately, I'm gonna have to charge you all with escaping lawful custody.
What? Hannibal, what is this guy talking about?
B.A., we were wrongly convicted, but it's still illegal to break out of jail.
Director McCready, Smith and his team
were instrumental in recovering those plates.
They're still level-10 federal fugitives and I need that off my desk.
This is chickenshit, sir.
Yeah, well, you know what? Perhaps for them, it is chickenshit,
but for you, Captain, we're re-promoting you to your former rank.
So, look, they're gonna be delivered
to the U.S. Marshals Service here in Long Beach.
- And there should be a C-5 transport... - I understand, but...
...on the tarmac in half an hour.
- This needs to be done. - This is really unfair, sir.
- This is bullshit. - I'm like Harry Houdini.
I chew through your cuffs.
- Get up. Step up. Get in there! - Step up!
- Let's go. Get moving. - Stop. Wait, stop.
- Move it. - Wait.
- This is so wrong. - It got a little aggressive.
- Don't worry about it. - This is really, really wrong,
and I'm going to do everything I can to fix it.
- I know you will. - I'm so sorry, Face.
Nice plan, Face.
Yeah. We just traded Lynches, and we're going back to prison.
We returned the plates. We can hold our heads high.
We did the right thing.
Yeah, and look what they did to us. This is some bullshit.
They burned us again, Hannibal.
We trusted the system and it turned on us.
Remember, boys, no matter how random things might appear,
there is still a plan. Kid.
Well, I don't mean to steal your line, boss, but...
- Yeah. - I love it when a plan comes together.
Still wanted by the government,
they survive as soldiers of fortune.
If you have a problem,
if no one else can help,
and if you can find them,
maybe you can hire
The A-Team.
Yeah!
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