All language subtitles for Black Monday - 01x03 - 339.TBS-MEMENTO-ION10.English.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese Download
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:06,660 Previously on Black Monday... 2 00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:08,280 - Oh! - How are you gonna get Blair 3 00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:10,920 to just give us his Georgina shares once he's married? 4 00:00:10,940 --> 00:00:14,279 I'm gonna form a father-son reverse Diff'rent Strokes. 5 00:00:14,280 --> 00:00:16,019 What's up, queef? 6 00:00:16,020 --> 00:00:18,210 Keith is a... homo? 7 00:00:18,230 --> 00:00:20,009 All I want is a piece of what we built. 8 00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,051 If we're not gonna do this deal, I got to go. 9 00:00:22,130 --> 00:00:23,340 I am not a people person. 10 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:25,440 Do you know who's really good? My partner, Dawn. 11 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:27,740 Why else do you think she's got 15% of my company? 12 00:00:27,830 --> 00:00:35,140 _ 13 00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:40,900 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 14 00:00:40,940 --> 00:00:42,466 Pull! 15 00:00:42,467 --> 00:00:43,800 Hurry! Use both nostrils! 16 00:00:43,880 --> 00:00:45,260 They're quacking at you, man! 17 00:00:45,340 --> 00:00:47,270 - Yeah! - Die, quackers! 18 00:00:47,300 --> 00:00:49,176 God, these graphics are so realistic. 19 00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:50,967 - Perfect score. - I have to kill ducks 20 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:52,717 after work. 21 00:00:52,730 --> 00:00:54,720 My kid is gonna plotz. His bar mitzvah's tomorrow. 22 00:00:54,740 --> 00:00:56,250 This thing is impossible to get. 23 00:00:56,342 --> 00:00:57,540 The line's bigger than the tits 24 00:00:57,550 --> 00:00:58,840 on the 'tute I paid to wait in it. 25 00:00:58,880 --> 00:01:00,820 Hey, speaking of fathers and sons and shit, 26 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:02,140 I need a little advice, Keithy. 27 00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:03,380 That's what best friends are for. 28 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:04,700 Ugh. Look, given that 29 00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:06,176 I'm the Muhammad Ali of pulling out, 30 00:01:06,190 --> 00:01:07,800 I don't have any sons of my own. 31 00:01:07,884 --> 00:01:09,600 To clarify, I'm as good at pulling out 32 00:01:09,630 --> 00:01:10,980 as Muhammad Ali is at boxing. 33 00:01:10,990 --> 00:01:12,467 He is terrible at pulling out. 34 00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:14,100 He's got, like, nine kids, five moms. 35 00:01:14,120 --> 00:01:16,200 More like Ali-mony. 36 00:01:16,220 --> 00:01:17,550 - Ugh. - Ugh, ugh. 37 00:01:17,634 --> 00:01:20,140 Look, I want to form a father-son relationship 38 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:21,720 with Blair, you know, so I can get close enough 39 00:01:21,740 --> 00:01:23,260 to him to stab him in the back. 40 00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:25,300 Oh, buy his love. Like that Nintendo. 41 00:01:25,383 --> 00:01:26,979 I mean, right? That bad boy's gonna make 42 00:01:26,980 --> 00:01:28,240 my kid forget all about the time 43 00:01:28,260 --> 00:01:29,717 he walked in on me trying to hang myself. 44 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:31,051 - What the hell? - Why can't you just 45 00:01:31,130 --> 00:01:32,400 jerk off like a regular guy? 46 00:01:32,420 --> 00:01:34,740 It's called asphyx-turbation, all right? 47 00:01:34,790 --> 00:01:36,840 You know, you choke your chicken while you choke yourself. 48 00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:39,200 I learned it from my friend in that band, uh, INXS. 49 00:01:39,220 --> 00:01:41,050 - It's amazing. - Buying love works. 50 00:01:41,134 --> 00:01:42,842 You know, I forgot my kid's birthday. 51 00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:44,160 I went and I got him one 52 00:01:44,180 --> 00:01:46,160 of the actual Darth Vader masks from the movie. 53 00:01:46,180 --> 00:01:47,360 Oh, uh, Return of the Jedi? 54 00:01:47,390 --> 00:01:49,508 No, I couldn't afford that, so I got the o-one 55 00:01:49,592 --> 00:01:51,425 from the rape scene in Revenge of the Nerds. 56 00:01:51,450 --> 00:01:54,050 But bonding isn't just about buying them expensive shit. 57 00:01:54,092 --> 00:01:56,050 It's about taking them to expensive shit, too. 58 00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:58,400 Blair was born in a cornfield. 59 00:01:58,540 --> 00:02:00,720 Everything impresses him, right? So just take him out 60 00:02:00,750 --> 00:02:03,440 to a VIP NYC night he'll never remember. 61 00:02:03,470 --> 00:02:05,180 - That's the ticket. - So parenting is 62 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:07,180 just like dating, but with no sex. 63 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:08,220 And that's great, 64 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:09,900 'cause I'm the Michael Jackson of dating. 65 00:02:09,940 --> 00:02:11,800 To clarify, I'm as good at dating 66 00:02:11,810 --> 00:02:14,540 as Michael Jackson is at dating kids. 67 00:02:14,550 --> 00:02:15,675 Brooke Shields. 68 00:02:15,759 --> 00:02:17,850 Jesus. It's 11:30. 69 00:02:17,860 --> 00:02:19,800 Can we please start the goddamn morning meeting? 70 00:02:19,880 --> 00:02:21,440 Hey, who wants to go double or nothing? 71 00:02:22,300 --> 00:02:24,180 - Yes! - 20 Gs you don't get one duck. 72 00:02:25,176 --> 00:02:27,280 All right, while you coke piñatas 73 00:02:27,300 --> 00:02:28,760 have been comparing nosebleeds, 74 00:02:28,780 --> 00:02:31,350 I secured a large chunk of public Georgina shares, 75 00:02:31,380 --> 00:02:33,880 which means if Mo can get Blair's family shares... 76 00:02:33,967 --> 00:02:35,842 "When Mo gets Blair's family shares." 77 00:02:35,926 --> 00:02:37,884 ... we're on our way to the 51% we need, 78 00:02:37,967 --> 00:02:39,508 but there's a twist. 79 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:41,592 Thank God. I was so bored. 80 00:02:41,675 --> 00:02:44,258 The quarter ends in 48 hours. 81 00:02:44,270 --> 00:02:45,467 If we file with this much on our books, 82 00:02:45,550 --> 00:02:46,820 everyone will know the shot. 83 00:02:46,850 --> 00:02:49,467 Our shell companies are full, so that means 84 00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:51,440 we need some people to hide the shares for us 85 00:02:51,500 --> 00:02:52,540 until the takeover. 86 00:02:52,570 --> 00:02:53,960 What about our overseas shells? 87 00:02:53,967 --> 00:02:55,884 We sold our overseas shells. 88 00:02:55,900 --> 00:02:56,960 By the seashore? 89 00:02:56,980 --> 00:02:58,400 Oh! 90 00:02:58,420 --> 00:02:59,842 Come on, fellas. 91 00:02:59,926 --> 00:03:01,300 This is a tightrope. 92 00:03:01,330 --> 00:03:03,092 We need people who won't fuck us over 93 00:03:03,170 --> 00:03:04,500 when we need the shares back 94 00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:06,160 but who we don't mind fucking over 95 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:08,675 by implicating in a felony, all right? 96 00:03:08,759 --> 00:03:10,842 Basically, our dearest family and friends. 97 00:03:10,926 --> 00:03:12,508 - Everyone I love is dead. - I'm not even a citizen. 98 00:03:12,590 --> 00:03:14,160 - I think, so... - All right. 99 00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:16,460 Wayne and Yass are out. Mo has no one in his life. 100 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:18,299 I can park a chunk, but that leaves two more. 101 00:03:18,300 --> 00:03:19,717 - I can park one with Shira. - Good idea. 102 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:21,020 Wait, wait, hold it. Wait, wait. Whoa, whoa. 103 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:22,884 It's ridiculous. People love me. 104 00:03:22,967 --> 00:03:25,620 Uh, is that why you were just brainstorming 105 00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:26,920 about how to make people love you? 106 00:03:27,009 --> 00:03:28,425 Oh! 107 00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:29,759 - She got you. - Thank you. 108 00:03:29,780 --> 00:03:30,789 Whatever. 109 00:03:30,790 --> 00:03:32,508 Fine, take the last one. 110 00:03:32,590 --> 00:03:34,559 And look, if you want to connect with Blair, 111 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:35,880 just talk to his ass, okay? 112 00:03:35,890 --> 00:03:38,500 Open up. Find some common ground. It's not that hard. 113 00:03:38,520 --> 00:03:39,860 Nah, I'm just gonna go 114 00:03:39,890 --> 00:03:41,342 with the throw-a-Nintendo-at-it plan. 115 00:03:41,425 --> 00:03:43,134 That's what I'm talking about. 116 00:03:43,210 --> 00:03:44,900 Hold on, wait. You mean tha-that Nintendo? 117 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:47,220 Oh, yeah, yeah. Blair is a fucking nerd. 118 00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:49,800 He is gonna love this chilling vision of our Jap future. 119 00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:51,140 Great jam sesh, guys. 120 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:52,660 - It was actually a meeting. - Okay. 121 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:54,380 - As you were. - All right, it's cool, yeah. 122 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:56,140 I-I can get another one by tomorrow. It's fine. 123 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:57,860 Oh, "Duck Hunt." 124 00:03:57,884 --> 00:04:00,759 I thought it was "Duh, Cunt." 125 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,760 This makes a lot more sense. 126 00:04:02,820 --> 00:04:04,460 Oh, my God. 127 00:04:04,550 --> 00:04:05,600 I bet he's gonna promote you. 128 00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:07,926 You are finally getting off the floor. 129 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:09,300 About frickin' time. 130 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,440 Babe, we don't know what this is gonna be tonight. 131 00:04:11,470 --> 00:04:13,051 Uh, the guy's unhinged. 132 00:04:13,134 --> 00:04:14,960 I walked in on him the other day masturbating 133 00:04:14,980 --> 00:04:17,019 to Hockey's Hardest Hits Volume Three. 134 00:04:17,020 --> 00:04:19,210 - He jerks off in the office? - They all do. 135 00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:21,592 Well, okay, whatever. 136 00:04:21,675 --> 00:04:23,508 How about you make it your promotion? 137 00:04:23,592 --> 00:04:25,220 You've literally been there for weeks. 138 00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:27,860 Babe, you don't really make Mo do stuff. 139 00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:30,620 He more sort of does stuff to you, 140 00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:32,740 like my gymnastics team doctor. 141 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:34,770 You were supposed to start as a VP at one of the big three. 142 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,000 Instead, you're stuck as a runner, 143 00:04:36,020 --> 00:04:38,280 and we're stuck living in this trash compactor 144 00:04:38,340 --> 00:04:39,920 that doesn't even have a trash compactor. 145 00:04:40,009 --> 00:04:41,840 Am I supposed to compact my own trash 146 00:04:41,860 --> 00:04:43,340 like some kind of piece of trash? 147 00:04:43,420 --> 00:04:44,780 It's not such a crazy ask. 148 00:04:45,009 --> 00:04:47,800 Just let my parents buy us one trash compactor. 149 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:49,560 How many were you wanting? 150 00:04:49,717 --> 00:04:52,350 Tiff, I told you I am very uncomfortable 151 00:04:52,380 --> 00:04:54,250 with your parents paying for anything. 152 00:04:54,342 --> 00:04:56,009 - Ugh! - My time on the floor 153 00:04:56,090 --> 00:04:58,700 has made my algorithm 2.0 so much better. 154 00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:00,967 It better be better. You're working on it every night, 155 00:05:01,050 --> 00:05:02,520 and we barely see each other. 156 00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:06,560 And I am not even bringing up the no-sex stuff, 157 00:05:06,580 --> 00:05:08,300 which I shouldn't even be the one not bringing up. 158 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:09,340 You should be. 159 00:05:09,420 --> 00:05:10,880 Not bringing it up? 160 00:05:12,467 --> 00:05:15,140 You know what? You're right. You're right. 161 00:05:15,180 --> 00:05:17,880 - Huh? - I should be more like you. 162 00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:20,220 - Wealthy? - Bitchy. 163 00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:23,590 I'm gonna go get that promotion. 164 00:05:23,675 --> 00:05:24,890 - Yes. - Tonight. 165 00:05:24,926 --> 00:05:26,675 - Tonight. Go. - Yes. 166 00:05:26,759 --> 00:05:28,220 - One more? - No, no. 167 00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:29,320 No more. 168 00:05:29,460 --> 00:05:32,420 Just... okay, um, well, I love you. 169 00:05:34,650 --> 00:05:37,258 The city that never sleeps. 170 00:05:38,570 --> 00:05:40,759 I'm really excited we get to hang out. 171 00:05:40,842 --> 00:05:43,500 I've been making great progress on my algorithm 2.0. 172 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:46,250 Shut the fuck up real quick, Blair. 173 00:05:46,340 --> 00:05:48,879 This night isn't about work, son. 174 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:50,920 It's about fun, son. 175 00:05:50,950 --> 00:05:53,675 You ever made eye contact with the Statue of Liberty? 176 00:05:53,750 --> 00:05:55,400 - No. - Oh, baby. 177 00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:57,160 This is gonna be great. 178 00:06:00,500 --> 00:06:02,380 Bad news, Shira. 179 00:06:02,400 --> 00:06:03,630 I'm gonna be a little late for dinner. 180 00:06:03,675 --> 00:06:05,508 This deal I'm working on is so hard. 181 00:06:05,592 --> 00:06:07,592 Aw, don't worry about it, monkey. 182 00:06:07,670 --> 00:06:10,560 We already ate... four hours ago. 183 00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:12,300 I was actually just sleeping 184 00:06:12,380 --> 00:06:14,820 because we have a very big day tomorrow. 185 00:06:14,850 --> 00:06:15,930 You're not gonna have to work 186 00:06:15,967 --> 00:06:18,051 all through our son's bar mitzvah, are you? 187 00:06:18,134 --> 00:06:20,634 No, no... I mean, but, you know, in work's defense, 188 00:06:20,635 --> 00:06:23,508 it is paying for this blessed celebration 189 00:06:23,590 --> 00:06:26,660 at the Plaza, you know, with Mr. Met prancing around, 190 00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:29,092 and Doc Gooden doesn't do an aliyah for free. 191 00:06:29,170 --> 00:06:31,400 No, you got to pay him... in drugs. 192 00:06:31,460 --> 00:06:33,460 You know, and drugs cost money, so... 193 00:06:33,500 --> 00:06:37,134 Okay, well, I look forward to seeing you extremely soon 194 00:06:37,217 --> 00:06:40,300 and all day long tomorrow. 195 00:06:40,383 --> 00:06:42,190 You and me holding hands, 196 00:06:42,217 --> 00:06:44,342 watching our boy become a bar mitzvah. 197 00:06:44,425 --> 00:06:46,280 - I love you. - Love you very much. 198 00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:47,710 - Bye-bye. - Love you. 199 00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:49,280 That should buy us a little while. 200 00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:54,660 To the star in Starlight Express. 201 00:06:54,740 --> 00:06:56,080 Mm, if I was the star, 202 00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:57,660 I wouldn't have to work three other jobs. 203 00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:59,300 - Mm. - No, I'm just another 204 00:06:59,383 --> 00:07:01,467 pair of skates in the chorus. 205 00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:04,176 And with the helmet on, you can barely even tell it's me. 206 00:07:04,250 --> 00:07:05,380 Oh, no, no, no, no, no, 207 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:07,739 because I would know these legs anywhere. 208 00:07:07,740 --> 00:07:08,750 Look at them. 209 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:11,217 - These guys? These guys? - Oh! So beautiful. 210 00:07:11,250 --> 00:07:13,640 Mmm. 211 00:07:14,750 --> 00:07:16,740 Are you okay? You seem distracted. 212 00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:18,258 No, it's fine. I... 213 00:07:18,340 --> 00:07:19,640 I just got to get Shira 214 00:07:19,660 --> 00:07:21,740 to park a shitload of stock by tomorrow, 215 00:07:21,750 --> 00:07:23,651 and she's already up my ass with a pair of cleats. 216 00:07:24,051 --> 00:07:25,675 Is that stock thing something I can help with? 217 00:07:25,700 --> 00:07:27,400 - No, don't worry about it. - No, I want to help. 218 00:07:27,460 --> 00:07:28,580 No, okay? 219 00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:33,590 I-I mean, no. She is gonna take care of it. 220 00:07:33,675 --> 00:07:36,134 And now let me take care of you. 221 00:07:36,210 --> 00:07:37,300 - No. Keith. Keith. - Come here. What? 222 00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:39,217 What? What? What? What? 223 00:07:41,020 --> 00:07:43,670 You're not making it any easier to leave her. 224 00:07:43,750 --> 00:07:45,899 You said you'd tell her about me. 225 00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:47,040 And I did. You know, 226 00:07:47,051 --> 00:07:49,508 I said that this deal was hard and... 227 00:07:49,592 --> 00:07:51,300 - No. - It's not... it's not anymore. 228 00:07:51,383 --> 00:07:54,092 Okay. You're upset. What do you want me to do? 229 00:07:54,170 --> 00:07:56,740 In your world, people look at you like it's expected, okay? 230 00:07:56,770 --> 00:07:59,660 And in... in my world, people look at me like I'm infected. 231 00:07:59,740 --> 00:08:02,630 Clever. Well, I'm sick of being the other man. 232 00:08:02,710 --> 00:08:04,959 Well, you aren't the other man. 233 00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:07,800 You are the only man, okay? 234 00:08:07,926 --> 00:08:09,890 - No, Keith. No. - All righ... come on. 235 00:08:09,926 --> 00:08:11,134 - Mike, come here, come here. - It's over. It's over. 236 00:08:11,217 --> 00:08:12,467 - We lost it. We lost it. - Come on. No. 237 00:08:12,550 --> 00:08:13,860 I'm going to shower. 238 00:08:13,880 --> 00:08:15,717 I got Jane Krakowski and glitter all over me. 239 00:08:15,718 --> 00:08:17,040 Fuck. 240 00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:22,220 For Mom, we have Dubonnet with a twist. 241 00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:25,630 And for Dad, Dewar's, splash of soda, two cubes. 242 00:08:25,717 --> 00:08:27,820 I hate when you call them Mom and Dad. 243 00:08:27,842 --> 00:08:30,759 - It feels incesty. - We should be so lucky. 244 00:08:30,842 --> 00:08:33,217 I mean to have Spence as a son, 245 00:08:33,300 --> 00:08:35,640 not to have kids that have sex with each other. 246 00:08:35,680 --> 00:08:37,500 No, no, I know, Dad. I know. 247 00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:41,880 Dawny, Spencey, I got a surprise for you. 248 00:08:45,700 --> 00:08:49,120 I present to you Nefertitty. 249 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:53,499 Wow. It's like her eyes are judging me wherever I go. 250 00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:54,879 It's the only piece I had left from my show 251 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:55,940 at the Power Gallery. 252 00:08:55,980 --> 00:08:59,200 This new Afrotica series is really striking a chord. 253 00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:02,280 The whole show sold out... first time in a decade. 254 00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:04,675 Yeah. I was the model for the baby. 255 00:09:04,759 --> 00:09:06,300 Dad. 256 00:09:06,380 --> 00:09:09,040 Everyone, I got a surprise for you, too. 257 00:09:09,060 --> 00:09:10,440 - I love surprises. - Okay, okay, okay. 258 00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:13,009 - Okay, okay. - Um... 259 00:09:13,092 --> 00:09:15,717 well, I just wanted to tell you guys... 260 00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:17,884 - That I am... - Pregnant! 261 00:09:17,967 --> 00:09:19,540 - Oh! Oh! - Yes! Oh, my God! 262 00:09:19,550 --> 00:09:21,340 Should you drink? Well, although, I did smoke 263 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:22,960 a ton of ganja with you... I guess it's okay. 264 00:09:23,051 --> 00:09:24,467 No. 265 00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:27,467 I'm not pregnant. I'm partner. 266 00:09:27,550 --> 00:09:29,040 At my firm! 267 00:09:29,500 --> 00:09:31,400 - That's my big news. - Oh. 268 00:09:32,051 --> 00:09:33,800 Congrats. That's really... 269 00:09:33,884 --> 00:09:36,520 We're not also pregnant by chance, are we? 270 00:09:36,540 --> 00:09:39,130 No, not pregnant. Promoted. 271 00:09:39,217 --> 00:09:41,467 And please don't be one of those guys that says "we." 272 00:09:41,550 --> 00:09:43,508 I just... I don't like it. 273 00:09:43,592 --> 00:09:45,258 Come on, Spence. Shit or get off the pot. 274 00:09:45,342 --> 00:09:46,884 - I'm trying. - What? 275 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:49,619 Wait, Dad, in your analogy, I'm a toilet? 276 00:09:49,620 --> 00:09:51,040 No, no, I think what Dad is trying to say... 277 00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:53,260 - That's what he said. - ... is that... 278 00:09:53,380 --> 00:09:56,360 it might be time for us to focus on more important things. 279 00:09:57,383 --> 00:09:59,820 What's important to me right now is the career 280 00:09:59,840 --> 00:10:01,710 that I've worked tooth and nail for. 281 00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:03,675 I mean, seriously, I-I've lost teeth 282 00:10:03,759 --> 00:10:05,330 and nails doing this job. 283 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:07,170 Which is the perfect opportunity for you to quit. 284 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:09,383 - Your career's gonna... - It'll be there... 285 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,009 - I make a very healthy living. - Your career will be waiting 286 00:10:11,092 --> 00:10:12,300 - after you have kids. - Would the men in this room 287 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:13,550 just shut the hell up? 288 00:10:13,630 --> 00:10:14,919 Until your body can give life, 289 00:10:14,920 --> 00:10:17,150 then you don't get to say a damn thing about Dawn's. 290 00:10:17,176 --> 00:10:18,499 This is the '80s. 291 00:10:18,500 --> 00:10:20,967 A woman can be whatever she wants. 292 00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:26,100 I'm happy for you, baby girl. 293 00:10:26,140 --> 00:10:27,800 Oh, yeah. 294 00:10:27,820 --> 00:10:30,159 - Thank you, Mom. - To you. 295 00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:31,250 I'm proud of you, Dawny. 296 00:10:31,342 --> 00:10:32,400 Mm-mm. 297 00:10:34,570 --> 00:10:35,600 Get ready. 298 00:10:35,620 --> 00:10:37,020 This is the hottest ticket in town. 299 00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,840 And we got killer seats. 300 00:10:39,926 --> 00:10:42,425 Why is she crying? 301 00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:45,020 - Oh, she knows how it ends. - Oh. 302 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:46,480 What are we seeing? 303 00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:47,980 - Death of a Salesman. - Oh. 304 00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:50,820 Yeah. You remember when that door-to-door vacuum salesman... 305 00:10:50,842 --> 00:10:53,258 he crawl-space'd all those nurses? 306 00:10:56,258 --> 00:10:57,842 - Oh, my God. - Yeah. 307 00:10:57,850 --> 00:10:59,217 More like "thank God." 308 00:10:59,300 --> 00:11:01,800 Glass is here, or we get Shamu'd by all the fluids. 309 00:11:09,217 --> 00:11:10,230 Whoa. 310 00:11:20,884 --> 00:11:25,425 Hey, Sheeshee. I'm so glad you waited up. 311 00:11:25,508 --> 00:11:28,592 Mm, I'm so glad you woke me up, Kiki. 312 00:11:28,675 --> 00:11:30,342 You're nervous about tomorrow, aren't you? 313 00:11:30,420 --> 00:11:31,660 - Mm. - It's gonna be a dream. 314 00:11:31,675 --> 00:11:32,960 - Mm. - I even picked 315 00:11:32,980 --> 00:11:35,380 the shortest haftarah portion, okay? 316 00:11:35,467 --> 00:11:37,508 I have a great idea. 317 00:11:37,592 --> 00:11:40,342 Since you're up, why don't you... 318 00:11:40,420 --> 00:11:44,100 give me a little signature right here? 319 00:11:44,300 --> 00:11:45,860 Right there. Yeah, look at that. 320 00:11:45,900 --> 00:11:48,549 Oh, oh, careful, careful. I got my perm set today, Kiki. 321 00:11:48,550 --> 00:11:50,092 Oh, okay. It looks great. 322 00:11:50,176 --> 00:11:51,759 Yeah, it looks really great. Okay... 323 00:11:51,770 --> 00:11:53,100 What is this I'm signing? 324 00:11:53,300 --> 00:11:57,320 Oh, looks like a document. I don't know. Boring. 325 00:11:57,340 --> 00:11:59,540 I think if you just sign it, we'll just be done with it. 326 00:12:00,342 --> 00:12:01,842 Yeah. 327 00:12:01,926 --> 00:12:03,926 Where's the Nintendo? 328 00:12:04,009 --> 00:12:06,950 Uh, it's at the office. 329 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,080 Keeping it safe. 330 00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:10,100 So, you know, if I just get a little, 331 00:12:10,140 --> 00:12:12,710 you know, "Shira" right here-a... 332 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:16,009 Or-a, why don't you go and get that Nintendo, 333 00:12:16,092 --> 00:12:19,300 bring it back, and then I'll sign this vague paperwork? 334 00:12:19,383 --> 00:12:21,350 I'm just... again, just thinking out loud... 335 00:12:21,380 --> 00:12:22,820 - Mm-hmm. - You sign it now. 336 00:12:22,840 --> 00:12:25,926 I get the Nintendo tomorrow on the way to Beth El. 337 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,180 Two birds with one stone, yeah? 338 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:29,009 - Or... just spitballing here... - Okay. 339 00:12:29,092 --> 00:12:31,383 ... no. 340 00:12:31,467 --> 00:12:33,140 Okay. All right. 341 00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:34,940 Well, you seem like you have a really, uh, 342 00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:37,420 strong path on this one. 343 00:12:37,508 --> 00:12:40,592 Uh, I will be right back. 344 00:12:40,675 --> 00:12:42,884 - All right. - And don't you wait up, okay? 345 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,460 Aww. I'm going shluffy. 346 00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:51,380 I never even open a menu. 347 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,350 I just order the most expensive shit, you know? 348 00:12:53,380 --> 00:12:55,380 - It keeps it exciting. - Oh. 349 00:12:59,759 --> 00:13:00,967 Oh. 350 00:13:02,130 --> 00:13:03,920 - Looks delicious. - Doesn't it? 351 00:13:03,980 --> 00:13:05,800 Mm-hmm. It's so fleshy. 352 00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:07,060 Yeah. 353 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,440 Dig in. 354 00:13:08,460 --> 00:13:10,060 Here we go. 355 00:13:10,110 --> 00:13:12,675 - This is so fresh. - It's the best part. 356 00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:15,100 After you, friend. 357 00:13:15,759 --> 00:13:17,634 - Cheers. - Yeah. 358 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:24,467 Okay. 359 00:13:24,550 --> 00:13:27,020 I'm sorry. I can't do this. 360 00:13:27,050 --> 00:13:30,634 I prefer my ground beef cooked and with cheese and on a bun. 361 00:13:30,717 --> 00:13:33,140 I'm from a town with one restaurant. 362 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:34,719 This world, it's very overwhelming to me. 363 00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:35,780 No, I get it. 364 00:13:35,800 --> 00:13:37,580 I'm not really into this rich shit either, kid. 365 00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:40,173 I mean, I-I kind of grew up like you, you know? 366 00:13:40,174 --> 00:13:43,280 But instead of one restaurant, I had no parents. 367 00:13:44,590 --> 00:13:47,080 Hey, what's your favorite burger joint in the city? 368 00:13:47,258 --> 00:13:49,920 Well, I've been wanting to try this dive by our place... 369 00:13:49,940 --> 00:13:52,060 uh, uh, Berger's Burgers, 370 00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:53,590 but Tiff's allergic to fast food, so... 371 00:13:53,670 --> 00:13:55,540 Hang on a minute. Berger's Burgers? 372 00:13:55,580 --> 00:13:56,600 - Yeah. - In Alphabet City? 373 00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:57,710 Yeah. 374 00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:59,260 I practically grew up there. 375 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:01,040 - Are you serious? - Yeah. 376 00:14:01,842 --> 00:14:03,634 You want to go there, get out of here? 377 00:14:03,717 --> 00:14:06,217 Uh, yeah. 378 00:14:06,300 --> 00:14:09,051 Uh, hey, come throw this shit in the trash. 379 00:14:09,134 --> 00:14:10,967 I just have to return my jacket. 380 00:14:11,051 --> 00:14:13,134 No, they tried to poison us. Fucking keep the thing. 381 00:14:18,180 --> 00:14:19,360 Hey! 382 00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:20,520 Okay, ok... 383 00:14:20,540 --> 00:14:22,176 Come on. Let me in. Here. 384 00:14:22,258 --> 00:14:24,660 Look, look, Shira and I, we broke up. 385 00:14:24,670 --> 00:14:26,719 It's over, baby. It's donezo, okay? 386 00:14:26,720 --> 00:14:28,850 I want to be Keith and Mike. 387 00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:29,960 I want to share everything with you. 388 00:14:30,050 --> 00:14:31,600 A-a place in Chelsea, a portmanteau. 389 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:32,640 What do you want to call ourselves? 390 00:14:32,660 --> 00:14:34,580 You want to call ourselves, uh, Meith or-or Kike? 391 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,000 - No, no. - No, no. Meith, Meith. 392 00:14:36,092 --> 00:14:37,780 Look, I want to be with you, okay? 393 00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,675 And I'm gonna tell her tomorrow after that bar mitzvah. 394 00:14:39,700 --> 00:14:40,926 I'm gonna be like, "Baruch atah, 395 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:42,620 adiós, baby," okay? 396 00:14:42,630 --> 00:14:45,000 'Cause I love you. 397 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:48,258 Come here, you. 398 00:14:48,342 --> 00:14:49,592 Mmm! 399 00:14:52,540 --> 00:14:54,000 - I'm shaking. - Yeah, you are. 400 00:14:54,020 --> 00:14:55,842 Um, we need to celebrate. 401 00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:57,000 Do you have, uh, champagne or something? 402 00:14:57,020 --> 00:14:58,660 - Yes, I'll get some. - All right, great, great. 403 00:14:58,680 --> 00:15:00,600 I'll get some. Oh, God. 404 00:15:01,340 --> 00:15:05,060 Okay... 405 00:15:05,100 --> 00:15:07,959 - Uh, out of champagne... - Yeah, sounds great! 406 00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:19,660 Oh! Fuck! Fuck. 407 00:15:19,884 --> 00:15:22,219 Keith? Holy shit! 408 00:15:22,220 --> 00:15:24,050 Whoa! I'm fine! I'm fine! 409 00:15:24,130 --> 00:15:27,820 I'm fine. 410 00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:29,720 Why are you stealing my Nintendo? 411 00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:32,200 It's my Nintendo, okay? I bought this for you. 412 00:15:32,220 --> 00:15:34,300 And now I need it for my son, okay? So... 413 00:15:34,340 --> 00:15:36,760 If I don't bring it to my son, Shira's gonna fucking kill me. 414 00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:38,200 Don't you want to be happy? 415 00:15:38,220 --> 00:15:40,258 I am happy. I fucking love my family. 416 00:15:40,342 --> 00:15:41,967 What, do you want me to leave them for you? 417 00:15:42,050 --> 00:15:43,500 For... for... for sex? 418 00:15:44,176 --> 00:15:47,425 Wow. Just sex? 419 00:15:47,508 --> 00:15:49,420 Okay. Have a good night. 420 00:15:49,440 --> 00:15:50,880 - Okay. - Okay. 421 00:15:50,960 --> 00:15:52,680 - Okay. - Okay! 422 00:15:52,740 --> 00:15:54,100 - Fuck you. - You know what? 423 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:55,200 Go blow on the cartridges, 424 00:15:55,210 --> 00:15:56,842 because that really works, Keith. 425 00:15:56,920 --> 00:15:58,380 Yeah, I'll give you something to blow on. 426 00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:01,634 Oh, fuck! My arm. 427 00:16:06,342 --> 00:16:09,383 Ah, there he is. Come here. 428 00:16:09,467 --> 00:16:11,092 Ah. Great to see you. 429 00:16:11,176 --> 00:16:12,634 H-how long's it been? 430 00:16:12,710 --> 00:16:14,100 Weren... weren't you here the night 431 00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:16,176 - that Dolly Parton was here? - Yeah, sure. 432 00:16:16,258 --> 00:16:18,420 - Yeah! What a crazy night, right? - Oh, what a night. 433 00:16:18,460 --> 00:16:21,090 Yeah, yeah. Missed this place. 434 00:16:21,176 --> 00:16:23,092 Can we get two classic Berger's Burgers, please? 435 00:16:23,170 --> 00:16:24,200 Sure. 436 00:16:24,220 --> 00:16:25,220 Let's do this. 437 00:16:26,009 --> 00:16:27,950 Oh, sorry. No change for this. 438 00:16:27,980 --> 00:16:30,240 Like I've ever wanted change. Get the fuck out of here. 439 00:16:30,260 --> 00:16:32,660 Thanks, pal. Hey. 440 00:16:32,680 --> 00:16:35,180 - Yeah, no problem. - Hey, come around. 441 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:36,640 - We miss you. - Yeah, good to see you. 442 00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:38,180 You really met Dolly Parton? 443 00:16:38,260 --> 00:16:40,380 Was she with Linda Ronstadt or Emmylou Harris? 444 00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:41,842 I-I'm a big trio fan. 445 00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:43,180 She was rolling pretty deep. 446 00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:44,300 - Ah. Wow. - Yeah. 447 00:16:44,380 --> 00:16:45,859 I mean, of course I know Dolly Parton. 448 00:16:45,860 --> 00:16:47,420 Who do you think bought her those cans? 449 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:49,800 I'm joking. 450 00:16:49,820 --> 00:16:50,960 - Oh. - God did. 451 00:16:50,980 --> 00:16:53,300 Sometimes He does give with both hands. 452 00:16:53,383 --> 00:16:54,890 Actually, it's my second-favorite night 453 00:16:54,926 --> 00:16:55,967 I've ever spent in here. 454 00:16:56,050 --> 00:16:57,800 W-what was your first? 455 00:16:58,420 --> 00:17:00,700 Uh... 456 00:17:01,425 --> 00:17:04,380 Uh... I grew up in an orphanage not too far from here... 457 00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:05,480 right around the corner, actually... 458 00:17:05,500 --> 00:17:07,370 and the smell from this place would just go 459 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:08,750 all throughout the neighborhood. 460 00:17:08,780 --> 00:17:12,092 And o... and one day, 1961, I ran in here. 461 00:17:12,100 --> 00:17:13,880 I grabbed a burger right off the counter, 462 00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:15,967 and I'm thinking, "Oh, man, I'm gonna finally taste this thing 463 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:17,780 I've been jacking it to all my life." 464 00:17:18,467 --> 00:17:20,717 But old man Berger, God rest his soul... 465 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:22,300 a lot faster than he looked. 466 00:17:22,380 --> 00:17:24,020 - Hmm. - Caught me. 467 00:17:24,120 --> 00:17:25,500 He didn't, you know, 468 00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:27,380 beat my ass or call the cops or anything. 469 00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:28,960 He gave me a job. 470 00:17:29,050 --> 00:17:30,879 - What? - Yeah. And that night, 471 00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:32,900 after my first hard day of work 472 00:17:32,940 --> 00:17:35,800 throwing out trash and mopping, sweeping, all of that, 473 00:17:35,926 --> 00:17:37,884 I cooked myself a burger back there. 474 00:17:37,967 --> 00:17:40,467 - And God damn it... - Best burger of your life? 475 00:17:40,550 --> 00:17:43,440 No, undercooked it. Nearly prolapsed my anus. 476 00:17:43,634 --> 00:17:46,009 But when I got out of the hospital the next night, 477 00:17:46,020 --> 00:17:48,320 I came back here, and Bergy cooked me a burger. 478 00:17:48,340 --> 00:17:49,920 - And that motherfucking... - I'm sorry, you... 479 00:17:49,980 --> 00:17:52,880 you immediately came back and ate another burger? 480 00:17:52,967 --> 00:17:54,425 The point is, Blair, it was dope. 481 00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:55,820 Huh. 482 00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:58,380 That's what Tiff doesn't get, 'cause she was born with money. 483 00:17:58,400 --> 00:17:59,720 Oh, yeah, the whole jeans thing. 484 00:17:59,740 --> 00:18:02,439 Yeah, yeah, and she wants to use her parents' money 485 00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:03,710 for everything. 486 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:06,400 - It's so annoying. - Well... 487 00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:07,579 Don't throw the whole baby out 488 00:18:07,580 --> 00:18:08,940 - with the bathwater. Oh, look at this. - Here you go. 489 00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:10,480 - Let's dig in. - Oh, thanks. 490 00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:13,350 And so Reagan is cutting all of the funding for the arts. 491 00:18:13,380 --> 00:18:14,460 Ugh. I wish he would've thought of that 492 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:15,639 before his movies. 493 00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:17,200 I didn't hate the one with the monkey. 494 00:18:17,240 --> 00:18:18,959 You know, Mom, now that I'm a partner, 495 00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:19,970 I could talk to the firm 496 00:18:19,980 --> 00:18:22,140 about maybe funding an endowment opportunity. 497 00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:25,780 Speaking of opportunities, I actually have one for you guys. 498 00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:27,090 Maybe make some easy money. 499 00:18:27,176 --> 00:18:29,176 Ooh, my favorite kind. 500 00:18:29,258 --> 00:18:32,759 Mine is the rupee. It's an Indian currency. 501 00:18:32,842 --> 00:18:36,508 It's a fun word, too... rupee. 502 00:18:36,592 --> 00:18:38,634 Rupee. 503 00:18:38,717 --> 00:18:41,220 Yeah, well, all you'd have to do is just hold some shares 504 00:18:41,260 --> 00:18:42,880 for us for a few months, 505 00:18:42,900 --> 00:18:44,240 and then, you know, when we take them back, 506 00:18:44,260 --> 00:18:46,220 you'd get a nice payday. 507 00:18:46,270 --> 00:18:47,280 Easy-peasy. 508 00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:49,179 Uh, no, thank you, baby. 509 00:18:49,180 --> 00:18:50,500 I don't know, Ruth. 510 00:18:50,560 --> 00:18:51,919 Uh, things are kind of tight right now. 511 00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:54,020 We don't need any charity, Walt. 512 00:18:54,051 --> 00:18:56,634 You're about to make tenure, and as I mentioned, 513 00:18:56,710 --> 00:18:59,379 all my pieces from my Power Gallery show sold out. 514 00:18:59,380 --> 00:19:01,330 Mom, this isn't charity. 515 00:19:01,342 --> 00:19:02,890 You'd actually be earning the money. 516 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:05,090 This helps me, and it's real money. 517 00:19:05,170 --> 00:19:09,220 Real money is honest money, okay? 518 00:19:09,260 --> 00:19:10,840 I don't get it. 519 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:12,799 You just said you were proud of me. 520 00:19:12,800 --> 00:19:16,160 No, I said I was happy for you. Not proud. 521 00:19:17,134 --> 00:19:18,800 What happened to "this is the '80s, 522 00:19:18,884 --> 00:19:20,383 a woman can be whatever she wants"? 523 00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:22,020 That's the point. You can. 524 00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,000 So why would you choose to be a crook? 525 00:19:24,092 --> 00:19:25,550 "Hold shares." Come on. 526 00:19:25,580 --> 00:19:27,840 I'm not dumb, and neither are you. 527 00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:30,926 You are a brilliant, thoughtful woman. 528 00:19:31,009 --> 00:19:33,134 Make something besides just money for yourself. 529 00:19:33,210 --> 00:19:34,700 - Yummy. - It's not your fault 530 00:19:34,720 --> 00:19:36,258 that we put you in that private school 531 00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,134 with all those rich white kids. 532 00:19:38,170 --> 00:19:40,300 But now you're a... you're a yuppie. 533 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:42,240 Mmm. 534 00:19:42,759 --> 00:19:46,258 No, Mom, actually, I am a buppie. 535 00:19:46,342 --> 00:19:47,842 And you know what? I'm proud of it. 536 00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:49,840 Because all of our hippie parents fuck... 537 00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,675 Messed everything up. 538 00:19:52,750 --> 00:19:54,979 Why do you think your neighborhood is so bad now? 539 00:19:54,980 --> 00:19:57,740 Hmm? Money is the answer. 540 00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:00,634 Not protesting or painting porn. 541 00:20:00,660 --> 00:20:03,134 Dawn, don't bring your mother's porno into this. 542 00:20:03,217 --> 00:20:05,717 I think it's tasteful and arousing. 543 00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:07,740 Baby, why don't you just calm down? 544 00:20:07,780 --> 00:20:09,170 Don't tell me what to do. 545 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:11,260 And you're drunk, and you have surgery in the morning! 546 00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:12,940 You know what? I can do what I want. 547 00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:15,780 And if I want to be a barren robber baron, 548 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:17,460 then so be it. 549 00:20:21,842 --> 00:20:23,592 Most of the time, I just walk around that office 550 00:20:23,670 --> 00:20:25,240 feeling like one of the chickens 551 00:20:25,260 --> 00:20:27,092 my dad used to make me cut the head off of. 552 00:20:27,176 --> 00:20:28,570 Oh, my God, how many dad stories 553 00:20:28,590 --> 00:20:29,600 are we gonna have to listen to? 554 00:20:29,620 --> 00:20:31,620 Oh, I'm sorry, I have a dad. 555 00:20:31,660 --> 00:20:34,590 And you don't. 556 00:20:34,670 --> 00:20:36,060 But seriously, how do you guys get it done? 557 00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:38,320 I just don't feel like there's enough hours in the day. 558 00:20:38,340 --> 00:20:39,439 Cocaine. 559 00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:44,820 I'm dead serious. 560 00:20:45,020 --> 00:20:48,500 - Oh, my God. - Yeah, watch and learn. 561 00:20:52,860 --> 00:20:54,120 Ta-da. 562 00:20:55,842 --> 00:20:57,967 - Should I try some? - I don't think so. 563 00:20:59,508 --> 00:21:00,690 No, you don't want to do this. 564 00:21:00,710 --> 00:21:02,040 You can't handle this. Forget it. 565 00:21:02,100 --> 00:21:05,440 Uh, you don't know what I can handle. 566 00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:09,051 Okay. 567 00:21:11,884 --> 00:21:13,342 Okay. 568 00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:22,090 I feel more successful already. 569 00:21:22,170 --> 00:21:24,660 You little coke whore. 570 00:21:24,680 --> 00:21:26,650 Scarface! 571 00:21:29,590 --> 00:21:30,640 Okay, Bobby, boy. 572 00:21:30,660 --> 00:21:32,920 Say hello to Vanessa, the family... 573 00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:34,250 Thanks! 574 00:21:34,340 --> 00:21:35,639 And off we go. 575 00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:36,758 - _ - Thank you. 576 00:21:36,759 --> 00:21:38,634 - After you. - Have a good day. 577 00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:40,009 Yeah, you too. 578 00:21:40,092 --> 00:21:42,884 Who's Bobby? And who's Vanessa? 579 00:21:42,967 --> 00:21:44,467 Who cares? 580 00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:51,050 ♪ Shout, shout ♪ 581 00:21:51,134 --> 00:21:53,508 ♪ Let it all out ♪ 582 00:21:53,590 --> 00:21:57,860 ♪ These are the things I can do without ♪ 583 00:21:57,900 --> 00:22:00,000 ♪ Come on ♪ 584 00:22:00,090 --> 00:22:02,880 ♪ I'm talking to you ♪ 585 00:22:02,900 --> 00:22:04,420 ♪ Come on ♪ 586 00:22:08,180 --> 00:22:10,300 ♪ Shout, shout ♪ 587 00:22:10,383 --> 00:22:12,926 ♪ Let it all out ♪ 588 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:17,319 ♪ These are the things I can do without ♪ 589 00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:19,940 ♪ Come on ♪ 590 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,000 ♪ I'm talking to you ♪ 591 00:22:22,090 --> 00:22:23,240 ♪ Come on ♪ 592 00:22:26,630 --> 00:22:30,960 ♪ In violent times ♪ 593 00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:36,250 ♪ You shouldn't have to sell your soul ♪ 594 00:22:36,340 --> 00:22:40,960 ♪ In black and white ♪ 595 00:22:40,980 --> 00:22:46,250 ♪ They really, really ought to know ♪ 596 00:22:46,342 --> 00:22:49,592 ♪ Those one-track minds ♪ 597 00:22:50,900 --> 00:22:54,759 ♪ That took you for a working boy ♪ 598 00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:59,860 ♪ Kiss them good-bye ♪ 599 00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:04,710 ♪ You shouldn't have to jump for joy ♪ 600 00:23:08,300 --> 00:23:10,600 Oh, God. 601 00:23:10,620 --> 00:23:12,060 Oh. 602 00:23:12,120 --> 00:23:15,080 The moon is so much brighter when you're on cocaine. 603 00:23:16,130 --> 00:23:17,780 Yeah, that's the sun, Blair. 604 00:23:20,592 --> 00:23:22,508 Okay, well, I'm late for Jew church. 605 00:23:22,590 --> 00:23:23,800 Why don't you try to get some rest? 606 00:23:23,820 --> 00:23:25,950 Thank you. Thank you. That was... that was a great... 607 00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:27,100 that was a great night. 608 00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:28,600 - Yeah, it was a great night. - Yeah, yeah. 609 00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:31,050 - Okay. - Oh, um, uh... 610 00:23:31,134 --> 00:23:33,051 may... may I have a promotion, please? 611 00:23:33,130 --> 00:23:34,660 Um, uh, for the following reasons... 612 00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:37,080 One, I'm a very hard worker. B, the algorithm, at this... 613 00:23:37,100 --> 00:23:39,619 You know what? Yeah. 614 00:23:39,620 --> 00:23:41,760 Why not? I dub thee promoted. Fuck it. 615 00:23:41,860 --> 00:23:43,080 Yeah? 616 00:23:44,717 --> 00:23:46,383 - Thank you. Thank you. - Yeah. 617 00:23:46,460 --> 00:23:47,599 - Thank you. - Yeah. You have a good night. 618 00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:50,140 - Yeah, you too, you too. - Oh, hey, wait a minute. 619 00:23:50,180 --> 00:23:51,990 I forgot. I got to give this to you. 620 00:23:54,100 --> 00:23:56,100 All right, take it easy. 621 00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:59,320 ♪ Shout, let it all out ♪ 622 00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:04,739 Tiff, have you ever had sex with a guy 623 00:24:04,740 --> 00:24:06,800 with a huge promoti... 624 00:24:10,092 --> 00:24:11,550 What? 625 00:24:14,340 --> 00:24:16,300 What the fuck did you do? 626 00:24:16,340 --> 00:24:19,380 Before you spaz out, check out... 627 00:24:19,460 --> 00:24:21,080 how cool this is. 628 00:24:21,500 --> 00:24:23,180 Ah! 629 00:24:23,300 --> 00:24:25,200 We talked about this. 630 00:24:25,220 --> 00:24:26,850 You know how it makes me feel 631 00:24:26,884 --> 00:24:29,280 when you... y-y-you take things from your parents 632 00:24:29,300 --> 00:24:30,967 that I should be providing. 633 00:24:31,050 --> 00:24:32,379 - I asked you to not... - You know what? No. 634 00:24:32,380 --> 00:24:33,840 - I am so done. - Take my dick 635 00:24:33,926 --> 00:24:35,884 and put it in the trash compactor. 636 00:24:35,967 --> 00:24:37,467 - That's what you want to do... - Cannot hear you. 637 00:24:37,500 --> 00:24:39,383 Just call your parents and have them come over. 638 00:24:39,460 --> 00:24:40,560 Make your dad come over. 639 00:24:40,580 --> 00:24:42,640 He can take my dick and put it in the trash compactor. 640 00:24:42,660 --> 00:24:45,680 You know what? Stop being such a puss 'cause my dad has money. 641 00:24:45,740 --> 00:24:47,260 You know what? Fuck your dad. 642 00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:49,379 I would rather fuck my father! 643 00:24:49,380 --> 00:24:51,300 - No shit! - My mom, too. 644 00:24:51,380 --> 00:24:53,160 She could finger me with more gusto! 645 00:24:53,180 --> 00:24:57,060 Great! All the fingers in the world aren't gonna satisfy you! 646 00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:12,220 Way to go, Brad. Looking great. 647 00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:14,250 Where you been, Kookoo? 648 00:25:14,342 --> 00:25:16,508 Just getting the Nintendo, Shushu... 649 00:25:16,592 --> 00:25:18,258 from the office. 650 00:25:18,342 --> 00:25:20,120 - Mm-hmm. - Maybe we can, you know, 651 00:25:20,140 --> 00:25:21,520 sign these papers? 652 00:25:22,217 --> 00:25:23,800 You listen to me, Keith. 653 00:25:23,884 --> 00:25:25,300 You're going to prison. 654 00:25:25,383 --> 00:25:27,884 Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, 655 00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:30,780 but someday, and probably for the rest of your life. 656 00:25:30,926 --> 00:25:32,842 And I'm not gonna allow you to take me 657 00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:34,420 and our beautiful family down with you. 658 00:25:34,440 --> 00:25:35,500 Eat shit! 659 00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:37,860 Sorry. Great job there. 660 00:25:37,900 --> 00:25:39,400 We're so proud of you. 661 00:25:39,420 --> 00:25:40,850 Mommy and Daddy love you so much. 662 00:25:40,860 --> 00:25:42,879 - Love you so much. So much. - So much. 663 00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:48,700 Dad. 664 00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:51,260 Hey, look who it is. The big man. 665 00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:54,090 Doc Gooden's been in the bathroom for, like, 45 minutes! 666 00:25:54,170 --> 00:25:55,800 Is Mr. Met gonna make it? 667 00:25:55,820 --> 00:25:58,050 - I told everyone he'd be here. - Well, guess what. 668 00:25:58,130 --> 00:26:00,040 Tell your friends they got to be disappointed, okay? 669 00:26:00,070 --> 00:26:02,260 'Cause Mr. Met ain't coming. 670 00:26:02,330 --> 00:26:07,500 Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Mr. Met! 671 00:26:13,100 --> 00:26:14,670 He came. 672 00:26:14,759 --> 00:26:16,634 He came! 673 00:26:16,710 --> 00:26:18,340 I'd know those legs anywhere. 674 00:26:18,420 --> 00:26:20,200 That's a weird thing to say. 675 00:26:20,220 --> 00:26:22,342 Isn't his giant baseball head kind of his calling card? 676 00:26:22,425 --> 00:26:23,967 Yeah, shh, shh, shh. 677 00:26:24,051 --> 00:26:26,342 ♪ I only wanted someone... ♪ 678 00:26:26,420 --> 00:26:29,040 Looking good, Mr. Met! Whoo! 679 00:26:30,100 --> 00:26:31,134 Hey. 680 00:26:31,217 --> 00:26:32,926 Hey! 681 00:26:33,009 --> 00:26:36,508 Uh... great job out there. 682 00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:39,500 Thanks for coming. 683 00:26:42,170 --> 00:26:43,480 Look, want to know the real reason 684 00:26:43,500 --> 00:26:46,508 why I didn't let you park those shares? 685 00:26:46,590 --> 00:26:48,800 Because if something goes bad, 686 00:26:49,634 --> 00:26:52,926 you are the only person in my life 687 00:26:53,009 --> 00:26:55,508 that I can't live without. 688 00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:01,040 Can you maybe take off the head? 689 00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:03,900 'Cause I cannot gauge how any of this is landing. 690 00:27:12,090 --> 00:27:15,840 If Shira won't take those shares, I will. 691 00:27:15,900 --> 00:27:17,320 No. Why? 692 00:27:17,350 --> 00:27:19,420 'Cause I would like to make enough money so I don't 693 00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:21,260 have to prance around for a bunch of spoiled brats 694 00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:24,080 in an off-brand Señor Met costume I got in Chinatown 695 00:27:24,100 --> 00:27:26,425 'cause you couldn't get the real one to show up. 696 00:27:26,508 --> 00:27:27,967 Come here, you. 697 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:30,176 Uh, blessed day. 698 00:27:30,258 --> 00:27:32,508 Uh... 699 00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:40,342 All right, go and enjoy the party. 700 00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:53,700 Oh! A board game. 701 00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:56,020 Okay, that's gonna pay for college. Thank you. 702 00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:57,850 Your cousins are a bunch of schnorrers. 703 00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:00,320 Thank you. Thank you. Very sweet. 704 00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:02,000 You guys get rid of your shares? 705 00:28:02,020 --> 00:28:04,520 Yep. Could not have been a simpler process. 706 00:28:04,540 --> 00:28:05,879 Totally remembered to do that. 707 00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:07,460 Who'd you go with? 708 00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:17,090 What's this? 709 00:28:21,340 --> 00:28:23,180 - That's my kid. - I know. 710 00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:24,590 Mazel titties. 711 00:28:24,675 --> 00:28:27,592 Excuse me. Hey. 712 00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:29,051 Hey, Mo. Hey, guys. 713 00:28:29,070 --> 00:28:31,400 Um, so I came here to tell you two things. 714 00:28:31,420 --> 00:28:34,100 One... and this might be the cocaine talking, 715 00:28:34,120 --> 00:28:35,920 but can we get some more cocaine? 716 00:28:36,009 --> 00:28:37,800 And two... 717 00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,220 ... I broke up with Tiff. 718 00:28:42,590 --> 00:28:44,280 I broke up with Tiff! 719 00:28:45,210 --> 00:28:47,380 Is this a child wedding? 720 00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:51,519 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 52337

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.