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1
00:00:00,421 --> 00:00:03,621
♪♪
2
00:00:06,047 --> 00:00:07,127
What are these?
3
00:00:07,128 --> 00:00:09,628
Hm, grapes.
4
00:00:09,630 --> 00:00:11,010
Those are grapes, yeah.
5
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:12,681
Just put that in there
and let them ferment,
6
00:00:12,683 --> 00:00:14,103
and then make Grandma
some wine.
7
00:00:17,188 --> 00:00:18,478
Hey, Mom.
8
00:00:18,479 --> 00:00:20,689
(gasps) Oh.
Benjamin Wheeler,
9
00:00:20,691 --> 00:00:24,201
you are going to drop
to your knees and thank me.
10
00:00:24,195 --> 00:00:26,815
There is literally nothing
you could say that would
make me do that.
11
00:00:26,817 --> 00:00:28,147
Mm-hmm.
12
00:00:28,149 --> 00:00:30,149
Emma is officially
potty-trained!
13
00:00:31,152 --> 00:00:33,112
-Oh, my god, thank you!
-Yes!
14
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:36,915
I never thought this day
would come.
15
00:00:36,917 --> 00:00:38,157
How'd you do it?
16
00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:40,709
I didn't. That tip money
you did on your dresser did.
17
00:00:42,333 --> 00:00:44,973
Turns out, the kid
likes cash.
18
00:00:44,965 --> 00:00:46,085
(phone rings)
19
00:00:47,168 --> 00:00:48,428
Where's my phone?
20
00:00:48,429 --> 00:00:50,009
Uh, more importantly,
where's Emma?
21
00:00:50,010 --> 00:00:51,130
(toilet flushes)
22
00:00:51,132 --> 00:00:53,222
Oh, no. Emma! Emma!
23
00:00:53,224 --> 00:00:56,104
Emma-- Oh, god-- No!
24
00:00:56,097 --> 00:00:57,477
My phone!
25
00:00:58,439 --> 00:01:00,139
My bad, I couldn't
potty-train her
26
00:01:00,141 --> 00:01:02,141
but I did teach her
flushing things is funny.
27
00:01:03,394 --> 00:01:05,034
(theme music playing)
28
00:01:05,025 --> 00:01:08,185
♪ It's amazing how
the unexpected ♪
29
00:01:08,189 --> 00:01:11,239
♪ Can take your life
and change direction ♪
30
00:01:14,655 --> 00:01:15,995
Really?
31
00:01:15,996 --> 00:01:17,656
Yeah, that's amazing!
32
00:01:17,658 --> 00:01:19,198
Oh, no, I promise.
33
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:20,580
I won't tell anybody.
34
00:01:22,123 --> 00:01:23,203
I have to tell somebody.
35
00:01:24,205 --> 00:01:25,415
Oh, Emma.
36
00:01:25,416 --> 00:01:27,336
You're not gonna believe
what just happened.
37
00:01:27,338 --> 00:01:29,128
Have you ever heard of
Elena Rios?
38
00:01:32,133 --> 00:01:33,303
Yeah, me either.
39
00:01:33,304 --> 00:01:36,774
But she's a giant movie star
in Spain
40
00:01:36,767 --> 00:01:39,387
and she's got a huge movie
opening here.
41
00:01:39,390 --> 00:01:41,930
And her manager thinks that
it might help her get more press
42
00:01:41,932 --> 00:01:44,362
if she pretends to date
a famous American athlete.
43
00:01:44,355 --> 00:01:46,105
I guess they couldn't find one,
so they called me!
44
00:01:48,399 --> 00:01:50,359
Oh, I know what you're thinking.
45
00:01:50,361 --> 00:01:52,151
You're thinking about
Aunt Riley, aren't you?
46
00:01:53,654 --> 00:01:56,294
Well, I haven't told you this,
but we aren't dating right now.
47
00:01:56,287 --> 00:01:58,407
Plus this whole thing
with Elena
48
00:01:58,409 --> 00:01:59,949
is strictly professional.
49
00:01:59,950 --> 00:02:01,330
It's just for publicity.
50
00:02:01,332 --> 00:02:02,702
Hey, dude,
what's going on?
51
00:02:02,703 --> 00:02:05,383
Oh, um, Emma was just
explaining her story.
52
00:02:05,376 --> 00:02:06,876
So let me get this straight,
53
00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:08,457
he huffed, then he puffed,
54
00:02:08,459 --> 00:02:10,509
then he blew the house down?
55
00:02:11,512 --> 00:02:13,052
Got it.
56
00:02:13,053 --> 00:02:14,263
See ya, Ben.
57
00:02:17,218 --> 00:02:19,558
It's nice that Danny
has someone to talk to
about literature.
58
00:02:23,974 --> 00:02:26,234
Hey, Tuck, how'd it go?
59
00:02:26,227 --> 00:02:28,767
Did your super hot producer
Julia agree to go out with me?
60
00:02:28,769 --> 00:02:30,229
She did. She did,
61
00:02:30,231 --> 00:02:32,981
but remember, man,
I work with this girl.
62
00:02:32,983 --> 00:02:34,833
Okay, so don't be too...
63
00:02:34,825 --> 00:02:36,365
you.
64
00:02:37,408 --> 00:02:39,198
Dude, you have nothing
to fear, okay?
65
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,910
I will be polite,
mature--
66
00:02:40,911 --> 00:02:42,201
What the hell?
67
00:02:42,203 --> 00:02:44,713
-Huh?
-That's Danny.
68
00:02:44,705 --> 00:02:46,415
On a date, with a movie star.
69
00:02:47,958 --> 00:02:50,788
What? Read your phone,
join the 21st century.
70
00:02:51,842 --> 00:02:53,252
Hey, guys.
71
00:02:53,254 --> 00:02:54,604
Yo, seriously, bro?
72
00:02:54,595 --> 00:02:56,715
-Elena Rios?
-Why didn't you tell us?
73
00:02:56,717 --> 00:02:58,007
So not a big deal.
74
00:02:58,008 --> 00:02:59,388
Uh-huh, yeah it is!
75
00:02:59,390 --> 00:03:00,760
Dude, look at the headline.
76
00:03:00,761 --> 00:03:03,261
It says, "This is such
a big deal."
77
00:03:03,264 --> 00:03:06,234
God, I can't believe
I thought Riley was the best
you could do.
78
00:03:06,227 --> 00:03:07,267
Congrats, bro.
79
00:03:10,020 --> 00:03:13,480
How could you not tell me
that you're dating a movie star,
man?
80
00:03:13,484 --> 00:03:15,704
If I ever want to make it
on the entertainment desk,
81
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:17,406
this is the kind of story
I need to break.
82
00:03:17,408 --> 00:03:20,408
Look, I'm trying to do something
important with my life, okay?
83
00:03:20,411 --> 00:03:21,661
Something that matters.
84
00:03:21,662 --> 00:03:23,912
Celebrity news.
85
00:03:23,914 --> 00:03:25,004
All right,
86
00:03:24,995 --> 00:03:27,415
just give me a piece
of exclusive information,
87
00:03:27,418 --> 00:03:28,328
like how'd you two meet?
88
00:03:28,329 --> 00:03:30,249
Oh, um...
89
00:03:30,251 --> 00:03:32,331
it's a long story.
90
00:03:32,333 --> 00:03:34,553
I had it written down,
I'll go get it.
91
00:03:37,428 --> 00:03:40,968
Thanks for finally inviting me
to the cool girls lunch, ladies.
92
00:03:40,971 --> 00:03:44,051
I'm so tired of eating with
those HR gals.
93
00:03:44,054 --> 00:03:48,064
Apparently, everything I say
is offensive or racist.
94
00:03:48,058 --> 00:03:49,398
(scoffs) Narcs.
95
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:52,481
To being young
and single.
96
00:03:52,483 --> 00:03:54,023
Uh-huh, well,
97
00:03:54,024 --> 00:03:55,864
one of us
is just young.
98
00:03:55,856 --> 00:03:59,486
But not as young
as my husband, Brad.
99
00:03:59,490 --> 00:04:02,450
He's got a face that will
make you believe in God,
100
00:04:02,453 --> 00:04:05,333
and an ass that will make you
believe in the devil.
101
00:04:05,326 --> 00:04:07,166
I hear the sizzle.
102
00:04:07,167 --> 00:04:08,457
Where's the steak?
103
00:04:08,459 --> 00:04:10,329
Show these chicks
some pics.
104
00:04:10,331 --> 00:04:11,871
Oh, well,
here's the thing,
105
00:04:11,872 --> 00:04:15,142
my granddaughter
flushed my phone
down the toilet.
106
00:04:15,135 --> 00:04:18,585
Makes you wish for the old days
when you could just pull it out
by the cord.
107
00:04:18,589 --> 00:04:21,969
Like you pulled that story
just now out of your ass?
108
00:04:24,555 --> 00:04:25,515
No.
109
00:04:25,516 --> 00:04:26,806
No, I swear.
110
00:04:26,807 --> 00:04:28,767
I mean, I would
bring him to the office,
111
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:30,559
but he's off
traveling the world.
112
00:04:30,561 --> 00:04:32,151
(laughing)
113
00:04:32,152 --> 00:04:33,602
A spiritual quest.
114
00:04:34,815 --> 00:04:37,275
Finding himself.
115
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,607
I think I'm gonna
find myself the ladies room.
116
00:04:39,610 --> 00:04:42,570
Yeah. I'm gonna take this,
sometimes there's a line.
117
00:04:44,405 --> 00:04:45,955
What did I tell you?
118
00:04:45,956 --> 00:04:48,456
She is a compulsive liar.
I honestly
119
00:04:48,459 --> 00:04:50,369
think that she's pathological.
120
00:04:50,371 --> 00:04:53,081
Like she's got a hot
younger husband,
121
00:04:53,083 --> 00:04:55,683
and I don't like cats.
122
00:04:55,676 --> 00:04:59,876
But I guess when you have
no self-esteem and you're just
desperate to impress people,
123
00:04:59,880 --> 00:05:01,300
-then you--
-Excuse me, ladies.
124
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,301
Have any of you
seen Bonnie Wheeler?
125
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,193
I'm her husband, Brad.
126
00:05:05,185 --> 00:05:07,685
I'm back
from traveling the world.
127
00:05:07,688 --> 00:05:10,138
You're Bonnie's husband?
128
00:05:10,140 --> 00:05:11,810
That is what I just said,
isn't it?
129
00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:14,903
We're Bonnie's co-workers.
130
00:05:14,895 --> 00:05:18,935
I'm Judy, but you can
call me any time you want to.
131
00:05:18,939 --> 00:05:20,859
That's great.
132
00:05:20,861 --> 00:05:23,201
She's told me so much
about all of you.
133
00:05:23,203 --> 00:05:24,413
Especially you.
134
00:05:24,405 --> 00:05:26,075
She said you're the nicest.
135
00:05:27,247 --> 00:05:29,247
Anyways, I should go
find her. Enjoy your meal.
136
00:05:31,582 --> 00:05:33,082
Mom, Mom, Mom,
Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom.
137
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:34,333
What?
138
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,464
I think I just
did something weird.
139
00:05:40,591 --> 00:05:42,381
Oh, Riley.
Yo, what's up?
140
00:05:42,383 --> 00:05:43,803
Ugh, god, I don't know.
141
00:05:43,804 --> 00:05:45,774
Work's just a whole lot
of awkward right now.
142
00:05:45,766 --> 00:05:47,766
I got assigned to
this case with Ross,
143
00:05:47,768 --> 00:05:50,558
and I think he must have heard
that I broke up with Danny,
144
00:05:50,561 --> 00:05:53,061
because he keeps suggesting
that we have lunch
and I don't know--
145
00:05:53,063 --> 00:05:55,323
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
146
00:05:55,315 --> 00:05:58,435
I didn't really need an answer.
147
00:05:58,439 --> 00:06:02,649
But, you know, I am glad
to see that you're thinking
about dating again.
148
00:06:02,653 --> 00:06:06,793
'Cause I'm sure you
heard that Danny's dating
the hottest woman on the planet.
149
00:06:08,078 --> 00:06:09,578
Oh, my!
150
00:06:09,580 --> 00:06:11,120
Tell me everything you know.
151
00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:14,551
Wait, you didn't know that Danny
was dating Elena Rios?
152
00:06:14,545 --> 00:06:15,995
Elena Rios?
153
00:06:17,458 --> 00:06:19,918
Who's Elena Rios?
I've never heard of her.
154
00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:22,420
Well, you will if you
watch my broadcast tonight.
155
00:06:23,554 --> 00:06:25,604
Oh, my god, I just--
I just--
156
00:06:25,596 --> 00:06:28,966
I just thought that Danny
and I would have worked
things out by now.
157
00:06:28,969 --> 00:06:32,639
I'm waiting for him to finally
apologize and admit that
he was wrong
158
00:06:32,643 --> 00:06:35,363
so we can just fall back
into each other's arms
159
00:06:35,355 --> 00:06:38,565
and go back to making
other people feel bad about not
being as in love as we are.
160
00:06:40,571 --> 00:06:43,321
Riley, I'm sorry that
I'm the one that told you.
161
00:06:43,323 --> 00:06:44,623
It's okay.
162
00:06:44,615 --> 00:06:46,525
I'll be okay eventually.
163
00:06:46,527 --> 00:06:49,577
Yeah, well I'm not gonna
be okay, you just
broke my spine.
164
00:06:54,204 --> 00:06:56,924
I just can't believe
that Tucker set you up with me
instead of himself.
165
00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:59,497
Well, I think it would have
been hard for him
166
00:06:59,500 --> 00:07:01,750
after I saw him strike out
with the donut girl,
167
00:07:01,752 --> 00:07:04,042
the graphics girl,
and the coffee girl.
168
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,545
But, if you miss him
so much,
169
00:07:07,548 --> 00:07:09,098
he can come
on our second date.
170
00:07:09,099 --> 00:07:11,389
Oh, a second date.
171
00:07:11,391 --> 00:07:13,181
Guess I didn't do
as bad as I thought.
172
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:16,693
Or maybe I should have had
that second glass of wine.
173
00:07:16,687 --> 00:07:18,937
Hey, works for me.
174
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,689
Last chance to back out.
175
00:07:25,115 --> 00:07:26,525
No, I'm definitely good.
176
00:07:29,530 --> 00:07:31,070
Riley?
177
00:07:31,071 --> 00:07:32,411
Ross?
178
00:07:32,412 --> 00:07:33,492
Really?
179
00:07:34,705 --> 00:07:37,455
What? Just a little date.
180
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,787
Dating. Me and Ross.
181
00:07:39,790 --> 00:07:41,750
We're... on a date.
182
00:07:41,752 --> 00:07:45,592
So feel free to share
that information with everyone.
183
00:07:47,387 --> 00:07:48,547
This is a date?
184
00:07:48,549 --> 00:07:51,849
I would have worn
a more exciting tie
if I knew it was a date.
185
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:54,863
I'm excited about your tie.
186
00:07:54,855 --> 00:07:56,475
Excuse me, can we
get this to go?
187
00:07:58,478 --> 00:07:59,858
Have fun, kids.
188
00:08:02,442 --> 00:08:04,572
(chattering quietly)
189
00:08:08,739 --> 00:08:10,029
Ben:
Hey, Mom.
190
00:08:10,030 --> 00:08:13,320
Sorry I'm late,
but if it's any consolation,
I just had the best date.
191
00:08:13,323 --> 00:08:14,793
Yeah, I heard.
192
00:08:14,785 --> 00:08:16,375
What you talking about?
193
00:08:16,376 --> 00:08:18,666
I'm talking about the fact
that I'm married to a cheater.
194
00:08:19,670 --> 00:08:20,620
Brad cheated on you?
195
00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:23,042
No.
196
00:08:23,043 --> 00:08:24,633
You did!
197
00:08:26,797 --> 00:08:29,337
Well, in all fairness,
we never said we were exclusive.
198
00:08:33,764 --> 00:08:35,104
-(chuckles)
-...And the flower.
199
00:08:35,095 --> 00:08:36,555
Oh, yeah,
and the flower?
200
00:08:37,558 --> 00:08:38,768
Riley and Ross!
201
00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:42,439
I just saw Riley and Ross
on a date together.
With each other.
202
00:08:42,442 --> 00:08:43,732
Uh...
203
00:08:43,734 --> 00:08:45,784
Yeah, man. Yeah,
sorry about that.
204
00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,146
Why are you sorry?
205
00:08:47,147 --> 00:08:49,147
What? No reason.
206
00:08:49,149 --> 00:08:51,909
You pushed those together,
man, not me.
207
00:08:51,912 --> 00:08:53,152
I did?
208
00:08:53,153 --> 00:08:54,583
Yeah.
209
00:08:54,575 --> 00:08:57,655
The newspaper, I mean,
you moving on with Elena Rios.
210
00:08:57,658 --> 00:08:58,658
Man, this is all
your fault.
211
00:08:58,659 --> 00:09:00,919
Okay, I'm completely
off the hook here.
212
00:09:00,921 --> 00:09:03,751
I mean, not with you,
with something at work,
but who cares?
213
00:09:03,754 --> 00:09:05,054
Man, you're dating Elena.
214
00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:07,255
Doesn't count,
it's not real.
215
00:09:08,258 --> 00:09:09,428
Wait a minute.
216
00:09:10,430 --> 00:09:11,880
What do you mean
it's not real?
217
00:09:11,882 --> 00:09:14,602
Uh... did I say
not real?
218
00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:17,515
I meant to say not real fun yet,
but you cut me off.
219
00:09:17,517 --> 00:09:18,847
Stop cutting me off, dude.
220
00:09:18,849 --> 00:09:19,769
Oh, no, no, no.
221
00:09:19,770 --> 00:09:21,230
You are not
changing the subject, man.
222
00:09:21,231 --> 00:09:23,061
If you do not tell me
the truth...
223
00:09:24,985 --> 00:09:26,775
I mean, there's not much
I can threaten you with,
224
00:09:26,777 --> 00:09:28,987
so please, man,
just tell me the truth.
225
00:09:28,989 --> 00:09:30,279
Fine.
226
00:09:30,280 --> 00:09:32,740
The truth is it's just
a publicity stunt.
227
00:09:32,743 --> 00:09:34,073
We aren't really dating.
228
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:35,374
You happy?
229
00:09:36,366 --> 00:09:38,246
What?
230
00:09:38,248 --> 00:09:41,408
Dude, I'm covering this premiere
because I told them that you two
were dating.
231
00:09:41,411 --> 00:09:43,831
And I could get
a juicy interview,
and now you're--
232
00:09:43,834 --> 00:09:45,634
now you're telling me
that you're fake dating?
233
00:09:47,127 --> 00:09:49,507
This is so much better.
234
00:09:49,509 --> 00:09:51,339
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
You can't tell anyone.
235
00:09:51,341 --> 00:09:53,881
Nobody has this story, man,
this could be my big break.
236
00:09:53,884 --> 00:09:56,104
No, Tucker, please,
don't say a word.
237
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,596
I'm asking you
as a friend.
238
00:09:58,809 --> 00:10:00,099
Really?
239
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:02,600
The friend card?
240
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:05,282
You know you only get to use
that once. You sure you want
to use that now?
241
00:10:05,275 --> 00:10:06,685
Yes.
242
00:10:06,687 --> 00:10:07,897
Dammit!
243
00:10:07,898 --> 00:10:09,648
Shouldn't have wasted mine
on a sandwich.
244
00:10:13,654 --> 00:10:14,874
Hey, Emma.
245
00:10:14,865 --> 00:10:16,155
Can we talk?
246
00:10:17,367 --> 00:10:19,577
I can't believe Ross
is back with Riley.
247
00:10:19,579 --> 00:10:20,909
I mean,
248
00:10:20,911 --> 00:10:23,371
I should probably just
give up on us already.
249
00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:25,924
Riley's obviously moved on.
250
00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:28,006
I might as well
move on too.
251
00:10:29,089 --> 00:10:30,049
You agree?
252
00:10:31,091 --> 00:10:32,131
Yes.
253
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,512
Great, I'm telling people
it was your idea.
254
00:10:38,098 --> 00:10:39,178
(sighs)
255
00:10:40,220 --> 00:10:41,720
Riley! Ross!
256
00:10:41,722 --> 00:10:43,722
Hey, man,
how you been?
257
00:10:43,724 --> 00:10:44,864
Hey, Tucker. Good.
258
00:10:44,855 --> 00:10:47,685
Wow, that is a nice looking
briefcase you got there.
259
00:10:47,688 --> 00:10:49,978
I'm actually in the market
for one of these myself.
You mind?
260
00:10:49,980 --> 00:10:53,360
Wow. Wow, it's nice,
it's light, even.
261
00:10:53,363 --> 00:10:54,913
Handles a little bit
slippery though.
262
00:10:54,905 --> 00:10:56,235
Oh, snap!
263
00:10:56,236 --> 00:10:58,036
-What the hell's wrong with you?
-Oh, man! My fault.
264
00:10:58,038 --> 00:11:00,328
Let me get
the door, man. Whoops!
265
00:11:04,785 --> 00:11:06,915
Okay, do you want to tell me
what's going on
266
00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:09,957
or should I be working on
what I should tell the police
when they can't find you?
267
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:15,141
So, um, Riles,
any chance you're dating Ross
268
00:11:15,135 --> 00:11:18,715
just because I told you
that Danny's dating Elena Rios?
269
00:11:18,719 --> 00:11:21,429
What? No!
270
00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:23,851
That's so-- what?
271
00:11:23,854 --> 00:11:25,654
Hoo! Okay.
272
00:11:25,645 --> 00:11:26,855
That is a relief.
273
00:11:26,857 --> 00:11:28,977
Okay, 'cause, you know,
their relationship's
not even real.
274
00:11:28,979 --> 00:11:30,809
What? What? What do you mean,
it's not even real?
275
00:11:30,811 --> 00:11:33,401
Oh, it's totally fake.
It's all for the cameras.
276
00:11:34,484 --> 00:11:36,414
-What kind of reporter are you?
-Oh, hello no!
277
00:11:37,367 --> 00:11:39,657
(forced laughter)
278
00:11:39,659 --> 00:11:41,119
I mean,
279
00:11:41,121 --> 00:11:42,911
it honestly happens
all the time.
280
00:11:42,913 --> 00:11:44,413
But that's life
when you have a twin brother.
281
00:11:45,495 --> 00:11:46,785
God made two of them.
282
00:11:48,128 --> 00:11:50,668
That's us. I love this picture.
283
00:11:50,670 --> 00:11:51,830
It's real...
284
00:11:52,833 --> 00:11:54,093
it's real.
285
00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:57,546
Twin brother, huh?
286
00:11:57,547 --> 00:11:59,507
Do you think he'd go out
with me?
287
00:12:00,891 --> 00:12:02,301
I don't know.
288
00:12:02,302 --> 00:12:04,392
He'd definitely go out
with you.
289
00:12:04,394 --> 00:12:06,854
Oh! (forced laugh)
290
00:12:06,847 --> 00:12:08,767
I think we need
more drinks.
291
00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:10,979
Brad, sweetie, why don't
you get us some refills.
292
00:12:10,981 --> 00:12:13,191
And feel free
to take your time. Okay?
293
00:12:13,193 --> 00:12:14,863
Great idea.
294
00:12:14,855 --> 00:12:15,775
(both groan)
295
00:12:19,119 --> 00:12:21,949
Mm, mm, mm, mm.
296
00:12:21,952 --> 00:12:22,992
How's he in the sack?
297
00:12:24,865 --> 00:12:28,035
Oh, he is amaz-- (gags)
298
00:12:29,669 --> 00:12:31,709
He is just awesome.
299
00:12:31,711 --> 00:12:33,331
He is okay.
300
00:12:36,086 --> 00:12:38,966
Oh, my god. Thank god.
Ah, thank god.
301
00:12:38,969 --> 00:12:41,589
It's my son, New York Ranger,
Danny Wheeler.
302
00:12:41,591 --> 00:12:44,891
Did I mention that he is dating
rising star Elena Rios?
303
00:12:44,885 --> 00:12:47,225
Are you really dating
Elena Rios?
304
00:12:47,227 --> 00:12:49,347
I love her!
305
00:12:49,349 --> 00:12:52,649
Yep. I'm escorting her
to her movie premiere tomorrow.
306
00:12:52,652 --> 00:12:55,662
Hey, if you're such
a big fan, why don't you come
to the premiere with my mom?
307
00:12:55,655 --> 00:12:56,855
I've got tons
of extra tickets.
308
00:12:56,857 --> 00:12:58,567
-No, honey, actually I think--
-Oh, I'd love to come!
309
00:12:58,568 --> 00:13:00,068
-All right.
-Oh!
310
00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:02,820
If you don't mind me
third-wheeling with you
and your husband?
311
00:13:02,823 --> 00:13:05,003
Oh, is Brad back?
312
00:13:04,995 --> 00:13:07,075
Cool! I love him.
313
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:08,457
He's like a brother to me.
314
00:13:16,126 --> 00:13:18,046
And that's how you do
a fake kiss.
315
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:20,418
But on camera, it will look
muy real.
316
00:13:21,721 --> 00:13:23,511
Felt pretty real to me.
317
00:13:25,015 --> 00:13:25,925
Everywhere.
318
00:13:29,479 --> 00:13:32,139
You know, we don't have to
fake this, Elena.
319
00:13:32,142 --> 00:13:33,602
I like you.
320
00:13:33,603 --> 00:13:34,863
For real.
321
00:13:44,945 --> 00:13:46,245
What was that?
322
00:13:47,447 --> 00:13:50,037
"The sound of two souls
crashing together."
323
00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:52,870
It's a line
from my movie.
324
00:13:52,873 --> 00:13:54,333
I know it's not very good.
325
00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:02,340
Oh, Danny, hey!
326
00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:04,422
Uh, you remember Ross?
327
00:14:04,424 --> 00:14:06,274
I remember punching Ross.
328
00:14:06,266 --> 00:14:07,426
Ross.
329
00:14:07,427 --> 00:14:09,017
Danny.
330
00:14:09,019 --> 00:14:10,099
Ross.
331
00:14:12,232 --> 00:14:13,472
Danny.
332
00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:16,605
Take it you two
are an item again?
333
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:18,236
You take it right.
334
00:14:18,238 --> 00:14:21,858
But that shouldn't bother
someone dating Elena Rios.
335
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:24,991
Really? Oh, my god,
she's gorg-- Ow!
336
00:14:24,985 --> 00:14:26,245
That was my rib.
337
00:14:26,246 --> 00:14:29,326
Well, I gotta go get changed
for Elena's big premiere.
338
00:14:29,329 --> 00:14:31,579
But, you know,
I can get you guys tickets
if you want to come.
339
00:14:31,581 --> 00:14:32,951
-Oh, no, I don't--
-We'll be there.
340
00:14:34,374 --> 00:14:35,634
So will I.
341
00:14:39,589 --> 00:14:43,129
Look, is it me, or are you just
dating me to make Danny jealous?
342
00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:46,513
(sighs) Ross...
343
00:14:46,506 --> 00:14:50,056
if you're going to continue
to be so insecure, I don't know
if we're gonna make it.
344
00:14:52,933 --> 00:14:54,353
Can't believe
I have to do this.
345
00:14:54,354 --> 00:14:56,904
Please. I saw
your last girlfriend.
346
00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,566
I'm so much hotter
than her.
347
00:14:58,568 --> 00:15:00,108
My last girlfriend
was Riley.
348
00:15:00,110 --> 00:15:02,690
Exactly.
349
00:15:02,692 --> 00:15:05,662
Fine, whatever.
I'll walk down the red carpet
with you and Judy,
350
00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:07,195
but I got another date
with Julie tonight,
351
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:08,907
so I'm going to roll
before the credits do.
352
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:11,158
When you walk into work
on Monday, you can tell them
you met someone else.
353
00:15:11,161 --> 00:15:12,371
Who?
354
00:15:12,372 --> 00:15:14,242
I don't know, how about
your actual husband, Brad?
355
00:15:16,036 --> 00:15:17,376
Oh, that's good.
356
00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:22,000
Tucker! Tucker!
357
00:15:22,002 --> 00:15:23,302
Just remember,
358
00:15:23,303 --> 00:15:25,263
you only get one question
with Elena.
359
00:15:25,255 --> 00:15:26,965
So it better be amazing.
360
00:15:26,967 --> 00:15:29,137
Hey, yeah, I was just gonna,
you know, ask her about
the movie.
361
00:15:29,139 --> 00:15:30,509
Maybe
what's her favorite scene?
362
00:15:30,510 --> 00:15:32,510
No, don't ask her
about the movie.
363
00:15:32,512 --> 00:15:34,472
No one cares
about the movie.
364
00:15:34,474 --> 00:15:36,404
People want dirt.
365
00:15:36,396 --> 00:15:39,856
That means grab that
little shovel you call
a microphone
366
00:15:39,859 --> 00:15:41,149
and start digging.
367
00:15:41,151 --> 00:15:43,061
Well, I...
368
00:15:43,063 --> 00:15:46,073
I mean, I kinda do sorta
know this one big secret.
369
00:15:46,066 --> 00:15:47,736
But I'd have to
betray my friend.
370
00:15:47,737 --> 00:15:50,907
Pfft, Tucker,
you work in television.
371
00:15:50,910 --> 00:15:52,490
You have no friends.
372
00:15:53,493 --> 00:15:55,083
You need to be heartless.
373
00:15:55,075 --> 00:15:57,955
Look at me.
My grandmother just died.
374
00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:58,957
Nothing!
375
00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:02,541
Paparazzi:
Over here, please!
376
00:16:02,542 --> 00:16:04,792
Just hold my hand
and stop complaining.
377
00:16:04,794 --> 00:16:07,684
You're the one that told
them we were married
in the first place.
378
00:16:07,677 --> 00:16:09,467
Which isn't even believable.
379
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:12,549
Danny, I could see,
but you? I mean, come on.
380
00:16:13,683 --> 00:16:16,523
Ben, Ben, hey.
Have you seen Danny?
381
00:16:16,516 --> 00:16:18,226
Did she just call you Ben?
382
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:21,688
Oh, she calls everybody Ben
since the accident.
383
00:16:21,691 --> 00:16:23,151
You know, steel plate.
(clicks tongue)
384
00:16:24,234 --> 00:16:25,784
My name is Brad
and I'm married to my mom.
385
00:16:25,775 --> 00:16:26,985
Got it.
386
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,566
And I'm dating Ross
for all the right reasons.
387
00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:32,200
I mean, this is actually
kind of fun.
388
00:16:32,202 --> 00:16:34,572
This is the easy part.
Get ready for the interviews.
389
00:16:34,574 --> 00:16:36,294
And if you don't know
what to say,
390
00:16:36,286 --> 00:16:37,996
just say,
"What a magical night."
391
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:39,497
I know that's what
everyone says,
392
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:41,999
but I'm an actress,
no one's expecting much.
393
00:16:47,217 --> 00:16:49,387
Oh, my god. (scoffs)
394
00:16:49,389 --> 00:16:50,969
Can you believe them?
395
00:16:56,596 --> 00:17:00,096
Them, I believe.
It's us I'm having
a little trouble with.
396
00:17:02,272 --> 00:17:04,442
What was I thinking,
inviting Riley and Ross?
397
00:17:04,444 --> 00:17:05,864
They look so in love.
398
00:17:05,855 --> 00:17:07,735
Now I'm never
gonna get back together.
399
00:17:07,737 --> 00:17:11,067
Well, maybe she's just
faking it with Ross the way
you are with Elena.
400
00:17:11,071 --> 00:17:12,781
I'm not faking it
with Elena now.
401
00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:17,662
But, do you think if she
found out that Elena and I were
definitely faking it,
402
00:17:17,657 --> 00:17:19,787
that she'd break up with Ross
and get back together with me.
403
00:17:19,789 --> 00:17:21,159
How would she find that out?
404
00:17:21,161 --> 00:17:23,961
Because you're gonna say
that our relationship's fake
on TV.
405
00:17:23,963 --> 00:17:25,133
Really?
406
00:17:25,125 --> 00:17:27,005
You're gonna let me ask?
407
00:17:27,006 --> 00:17:28,926
This could make my career!
408
00:17:28,928 --> 00:17:31,798
Thank you, Danny.
409
00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:34,511
When I become famous,
I will not forget what
you've done.
410
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:37,175
Yeah, I probably will.
411
00:17:39,229 --> 00:17:40,229
Riley,
412
00:17:40,230 --> 00:17:42,230
this is ridiculous.
413
00:17:42,232 --> 00:17:45,152
You haven't taken your eyes
off of Danny and Elena.
414
00:17:45,145 --> 00:17:46,145
-Wh-- (chuckles)
-Look,
415
00:17:46,146 --> 00:17:49,896
I really like you,
but this is obviously a rebound.
416
00:17:49,899 --> 00:17:51,359
No! No--
417
00:17:51,361 --> 00:17:53,111
Riley, Riley,
I don't want to be
that guy.
418
00:17:54,154 --> 00:17:56,164
This is important.
You mean something to me.
419
00:17:58,158 --> 00:17:59,288
Okay.
420
00:17:59,289 --> 00:18:00,789
Okay. I'm--
421
00:18:00,790 --> 00:18:03,620
I'm not over what happened
with Danny,
422
00:18:03,623 --> 00:18:05,473
but I really, really want to be.
423
00:18:05,465 --> 00:18:07,465
So, if you just
give me a chance,
424
00:18:07,467 --> 00:18:12,257
I promise I will move on
and we could see
where this goes?
425
00:18:12,262 --> 00:18:14,762
I've always wanted
to see where this goes.
426
00:18:16,346 --> 00:18:18,976
And we are here
with Elena Rios.
427
00:18:18,978 --> 00:18:22,598
Elena, I just have one teensy
little question for you.
428
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:26,282
Is it true the you're a fake
couple set up by your managers
just to help your career?
429
00:18:27,357 --> 00:18:29,357
What a magical night.
430
00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,279
Right, mi querido?
431
00:18:34,364 --> 00:18:37,244
Uh, Tucker's right,
we were set up for publicity.
432
00:18:37,237 --> 00:18:40,407
But, it turned out
to be so much more.
433
00:18:44,834 --> 00:18:46,344
This is a hundred percent real.
434
00:18:52,962 --> 00:18:55,262
Well, in that case,
what's your favorite scene
in the movie?
435
00:18:57,517 --> 00:18:59,637
Danny! There you are.
436
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:02,259
Oh, whoa!
437
00:19:02,262 --> 00:19:05,022
I can't believe I didn't think
you could do better than Riley.
438
00:19:05,024 --> 00:19:06,444
Congrats, bro.
439
00:19:07,437 --> 00:19:09,317
Well, aren't you gonna
introduce us?
440
00:19:09,319 --> 00:19:10,769
Oh, right, sorry.
441
00:19:10,770 --> 00:19:12,320
-This is Elena--
-Ben?
442
00:19:12,322 --> 00:19:14,272
Julia? What are you
doing here?
443
00:19:14,274 --> 00:19:16,454
My job. What are you doing here?
444
00:19:16,446 --> 00:19:19,446
You know when people say
it's not what it looks like?
445
00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:21,239
That's never been more true
than now.
446
00:19:22,452 --> 00:19:24,952
Brad, why does everybody
keep calling you Ben?
447
00:19:24,954 --> 00:19:26,424
Well, because that's his name.
448
00:19:26,416 --> 00:19:27,496
He's my brother.
449
00:19:27,497 --> 00:19:28,747
Brad's my step-dad.
450
00:19:28,748 --> 00:19:30,418
Your brother's your step-dad?
451
00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:33,500
No. He's not, right Mom?
452
00:19:34,794 --> 00:19:36,474
No, sweetie.
453
00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:38,846
You're pretending to be married
to your son.
454
00:19:38,848 --> 00:19:41,098
You're on a date
with your mom?
455
00:19:41,100 --> 00:19:44,350
Yeah, but it looks like
we're about to break up,
so...
456
00:19:44,354 --> 00:19:47,524
Oh, my god! I was in a
telenovela like this once.
457
00:19:47,517 --> 00:19:48,767
Someone's about to get shot.
458
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:53,230
I knew you didn't have
a hot husband.
459
00:19:53,233 --> 00:19:55,023
I do, I do, I do!
460
00:19:55,024 --> 00:19:57,244
-She does. She really does.
-Yes!
461
00:19:57,237 --> 00:20:00,157
Look, I only told you
I was my mom's husband because
I heard what you said about her.
462
00:20:00,159 --> 00:20:02,739
My mom's a lot of things,
but she's not a liar.
463
00:20:02,742 --> 00:20:04,032
Well...
464
00:20:04,033 --> 00:20:06,423
Okay, she's a liar.
465
00:20:06,416 --> 00:20:08,456
-But not about this one
specific thing.
-Yes.
466
00:20:08,458 --> 00:20:12,248
Look, Judy,
all I ever wanted
was to fit in.
467
00:20:12,252 --> 00:20:15,512
And you know you're the
office Queen Bee.
468
00:20:15,505 --> 00:20:18,925
And if you say I'm cool,
then I'm cool. So,
what do you say?
469
00:20:18,928 --> 00:20:21,338
Oh, is that all you wanted?
470
00:20:21,341 --> 00:20:22,681
Why didn't you just ask?
471
00:20:22,682 --> 00:20:24,972
Oh, okay then.
472
00:20:24,974 --> 00:20:26,484
Can we be friends?
473
00:20:26,476 --> 00:20:29,516
Hell no!
You are so going down.
474
00:20:29,519 --> 00:20:32,519
The girls in the office
are gonna love this story.
475
00:20:32,522 --> 00:20:34,562
Judy, wait.
476
00:20:34,564 --> 00:20:37,124
I extended you an olive branch
477
00:20:37,116 --> 00:20:40,156
and you responded
with an act of war.
478
00:20:40,159 --> 00:20:43,199
(whispering) You have no idea
what you've done, Judy.
479
00:20:45,074 --> 00:20:46,464
This is all your fault.
480
00:20:46,456 --> 00:20:48,416
-(groans)
-Don't you walk away
from me, Judy.
481
00:20:49,869 --> 00:20:52,419
Wow. Dad was a saint.
482
00:20:57,046 --> 00:20:58,836
Julia! Hey.
483
00:20:58,838 --> 00:21:00,548
So, about me and my mom,
484
00:21:00,550 --> 00:21:02,340
we're not actually dating.
485
00:21:02,342 --> 00:21:04,382
Funny. Neither are we.
486
00:21:04,384 --> 00:21:06,894
-Does that mean you
don't want to go--
-No, I'm good.
487
00:21:06,886 --> 00:21:10,096
Hey, how many guys can you say
dumped their mom for you?
488
00:21:10,099 --> 00:21:11,809
No? Okay.
489
00:21:13,523 --> 00:21:17,033
So, guess I'm gonna
change back into
my weatherman tie.
490
00:21:17,026 --> 00:21:18,356
How'd it go with Julia?
491
00:21:18,358 --> 00:21:19,858
Bad news.
492
00:21:19,859 --> 00:21:21,609
Remember when you said
not to be me?
493
00:21:23,072 --> 00:21:24,202
I was me.
33720
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