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Previously on Bartlett.
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It's not Tuesday. It's Thursday.
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Okay.
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This is Bartlett.
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Mobilize your passion.
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Best bitch I ever saw.
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While I have your attention, I wrote a
little
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ditty.
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Who said anything about Maggie?
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Oh, God.
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Maggie?
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Maggie? 5 .30?
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Maggie? Maggie? 5 .30?
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Bitch. Oh, shit. Maggie?
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Maggie?
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Caitlin, it's Roger.
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Don't panic.
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Just tell them I'm on my way. Stole
them.
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Just stole them. Shit.
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Pants. Pants.
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You've reached Maggie Nolan. Please
leave a brief message.
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I know what you've done. I'm coming
after you.
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Yes. Come on. Come on.
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Hello? Huh.
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It's Roger.
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Newhouse. Roger. Listen, you precise
bastard.
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I'm coming down there, and you are going
to have my car ready, or I'm going to
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lock the doors, pump it full of
gasoline, and blow you back to the
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-Hungarian Empire.
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Sorry.
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What happened to the blue Banshee?
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This is your new auto.
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This is... Same color.
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Same color. Yeah? All right.
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I'm driving. Let's go.
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Get in there, Hans.
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Move your bubble of tiny little strudel.
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Okay, be gentle.
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You need to be gentle. This thing's
built like a pander tank.
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Please, slow down. I can't. My shop is
right here. Sorry, Hans. This is
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kidnapping. No, this is the express to
pair computer.
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Now put your seatbelt on. I don't want
to get a ticket.
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Certainly is crazy.
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What? The shit.
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This is me, Roger.
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Michael Cooper.
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Gary in the end.
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Not from Munich?
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It was just something I did for my
clients. I thought it'd be good for
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and then it got out of control, and now
I can't stop them. God, you're an Enoch
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Bartlett, too.
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Enoch, not.
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Who's there?
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Me. What?
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Enoch Bartlett. I got a great pair.
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with the skin yellow pins and found it
on my lawn but they claimed it but it
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turns out my claim was a fraudulent one
not a grass not a seed but a bone
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creation not a chance at redeeming this
good christian and in turn how my credit
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would just proportion he not not they
all cried he died paul what a great big
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liar Southern was the scene, hella brash
and inspired.
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Pick a Williams, make it yours, and then
call you style. Now the state all
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claims manifestation.
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Not a draft, not a need for a
pedigreesome. Not a stance, no society,
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overcaution. And the time for admission
slowly slips away from Enoch Bartlett.
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The fruits of a yang.
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Enoch Bartlett.
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Go ahead, take a bite. You ain't got the
thing. Born to slap back a pathogastly
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named Williams. With our hands, if
you're nasty.
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I'll spit the truth in this parody to
see about who found fruit, yes, with no
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refute. With a taste beyond compare,
it's heavenly.
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Noted that when I discovered it in 1770.
But you say today this fruit is new,
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hey? Despite the fact I grew it decades
back in the UK.
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You can't join them, guess you got
beaten.
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Feed them to the earth like a seeded
arboretum. Claiming shit is your own
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The
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fruit
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-loving end.
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The fruit -loving end.
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Enoch Fogg. Go ahead, take a bite.
Probably good thing.
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I thought that Ethan was Employee of the
Month.
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Uh, no.
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It's me.
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Second time this year, actually.
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Oh. Well, congratulations.
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Have a perilous day.
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Thanks.
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We're in.
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Roger, Newhouse. I'm late for a pitch
meeting.
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Here is your badge, and you're going to
be in the floppy disk. Thank you. Which
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is... May I help you?
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Your smile has already warmed me like
the hot Bavarian strudel.
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Oh, wunderbar.
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Sind wir aus Deutschland?
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Ja.
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Hold that, hold that, please.
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Thank you.
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Can you, uh... Push fourth floor.
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No hands.
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Hey, can I see some ID, pal?
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Really? You seem stressed.
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Yeah, I'm late for a meeting, so... Oof,
I feel you, brother. I used to run the
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rat race before I discovered
telepresence, but shit.
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Why stress your body when what people
are after is your mind, am I right?
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You know where I am right now?
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Fucking Bali.
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Dropped my necktie, picked up my tie.
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Hey, that's not cool, man.
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Not cool.
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Hey, man, do you know where Floppy Disk
is? Are you supposed to be here? Do you
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have a badge? Yeah, of course I have a
badge. Roger Newhut, that's me.
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Okay, okay.
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You know, I get my arcane storage media
mixed up. Floppy Disk, man, come on.
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Okay.
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Laser disk?
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No.
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I omega.
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Five and a quarter. Come on, buddy.
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Oh, two.
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Floppy Disk is here. Okay.
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Thanks, Alex. Okay.
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Have a pair of a day. Bite me, Alec.
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Hey!
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Hey! That's my pitch!
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Aha!
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Ha what?
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You are a double agent.
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Roger. What the fuck are you talking
about? I am talking about Maggie taking
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pitch to Sanjay... Oh. Well, look who
decided to show up.
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You found the champagne.
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That is a bloody great fridge.
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There's one on every floor.
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What's going on?
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Your team turned up aces.
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We won?
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Mobilize your passion.
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As soon as I heard it, I knew we were
done.
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Maggie's brilliant.
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Oh, thank you.
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Fuck. Exactly what I said. Holy fuck.
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Blowing my mind.
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Woo!
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Maggie, join us. Yes.
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I don't know what's going on with you
and Maggie, but you and me, we're even.
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Oh, yeah, of course.
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Try and blackmail me again with those
Davis photos.
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I'll have you killed.
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I'm not kidding.
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I have Vladimir Putin's security chief
on speed dial.
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Terrible. What are you two chums
whispering about?
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00:09:06,590 --> 00:09:08,010
Just so proud of this guy.
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I'd like to propose a toast.
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May we all mobilize our passions.
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All right, folks.
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I have to vamo.
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Maggie, Caitlin, Bob, namaste.
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And to you,
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no sravia.
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Well, that didn't go to plan.
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Relax, Roger. Your pitch won the day.
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Without me. It's a fucking Christmas
miracle.
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Don't you want to hear what happened?
Nope.
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I've got a plane to catch.
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And I want to do a little Christmas
shopping for Andy Baker.
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Nothing says I hate you like a gift from
the airport.
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If you have any other questions, talk to
Maggie.
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She's in charge now.
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00:10:03,590 --> 00:10:06,070
Caitlin, chance to come to New York.
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00:10:06,490 --> 00:10:09,830
Whoa, what's he talking about? Bob
thinks that there's a lot of opportunity
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me in New York.
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00:10:11,490 --> 00:10:12,490
Opportunity?
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00:10:12,750 --> 00:10:17,370
Wait a second. This guy sits in his
office all day jerking off the Empire
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Building and the Chrysler Building.
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00:10:18,790 --> 00:10:24,050
That's the old Bob. Thanks to your sofa
fort, I am now a changemaker. You slept
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in my sofa fort? You let him sleep in
the sofa fort? I'm thinking about
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00:10:27,090 --> 00:10:28,870
one installed in my office.
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00:10:29,570 --> 00:10:32,570
Thanks for the offer, Bob, but, um...
Say no more.
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00:10:33,150 --> 00:10:34,510
I can call you an Uber, though.
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00:10:35,270 --> 00:10:37,050
I'll take my chances with a cab.
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00:10:37,430 --> 00:10:40,550
You can't have a cab in Silicon Valley.
You'll look like an unmotivated
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carjacker.
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Maggie, Caitlin, I bid you adieu and
I'll be in touch.
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Roger.
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00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:51,980
Thanks for the winning pitch. Sure, why
not?
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You going to apologize?
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00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:56,559
For what?
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For calling me a double agent.
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Well, are you going to apologize for
stealing my pitch? She didn't steal it.
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00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:05,520
improved it, delivered it, and sold it.
After I was asleep.
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I know.
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00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:09,660
No, you don't.
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00:11:10,119 --> 00:11:12,900
Roger, we've had sex. I know you fall
asleep afterwards.
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00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:16,360
Yeah, but I had... You told her. I did.
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00:11:17,100 --> 00:11:23,120
I told her it was sweet and nostalgic
and not something that I would do again.
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00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:28,120
Do you have a rule against this, or...?
Not today, Roger.
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00:11:30,680 --> 00:11:33,860
Well, well, you are a vision, young
lady.
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00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:35,940
Sanjay Khan here for my pitch meeting.
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00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:37,160
Welcome to pair.
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00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:43,040
I'm sorry, Mr. Kahn, but your pitch
meeting has been canceled.
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00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:44,840
That's impossible.
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00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:45,880
What do you mean, canceled?
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00:11:46,020 --> 00:11:47,780
Well, that's what it says here.
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00:11:49,880 --> 00:11:52,480
Fuck! Let me see Pete Wong right now.
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00:11:52,820 --> 00:11:53,820
Come on, Grandma.
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00:11:53,900 --> 00:11:56,020
Come on. I enjoy being a grandma.
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00:11:56,220 --> 00:11:59,200
And if you want to stay here one more
second, then you're going to have to
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00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,300
playing nice, young man.
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00:12:00,780 --> 00:12:03,140
Goddamn, that's the sexiest thing I've
heard all day.
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00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:05,980
Okay, I'm sorry. I didn't trust you. I
thought you were going to take the pitch
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00:12:05,980 --> 00:12:08,820
and run. I'm sorry I called you Benedict
Arnold.
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00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:10,400
See, isn't it nice?
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00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:12,100
Yeah.
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00:12:12,920 --> 00:12:13,920
Roger,
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00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:17,540
this is your severance package.
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00:12:18,560 --> 00:12:20,820
It contains several forms you will need
to complete.
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00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:25,580
By accepting this envelope, you'll agree
that your employment at Agency SF is
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00:12:25,580 --> 00:12:27,240
terminated. Why are you talking like
that?
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00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:29,660
I don't know. It just sounds more
official.
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00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:33,460
If you have any questions, ask your HR
manager.
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00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:34,840
That would be Caitlin.
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00:12:35,020 --> 00:12:36,020
Right.
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00:12:37,290 --> 00:12:38,390
Okay, you don't have to do this.
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00:12:38,610 --> 00:12:40,770
No, no, I do. No, I should give you
another chance.
223
00:12:41,130 --> 00:12:45,010
You shouldn't. Because you've changed,
Roger. I can see that. You have to fire
224
00:12:45,010 --> 00:12:46,730
me. It's the last note in the song.
225
00:12:48,850 --> 00:12:49,850
What song?
226
00:12:49,910 --> 00:12:53,690
So, um, Roger can do what he loves and
you can do what you love.
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00:12:53,970 --> 00:12:54,970
Like Mike.
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00:12:55,770 --> 00:12:56,770
The plant guy?
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00:12:56,890 --> 00:12:57,890
That's where I got the idea.
230
00:12:59,330 --> 00:13:00,810
But you were in on this.
231
00:13:01,070 --> 00:13:04,130
Well, you knew that Bob was going to
give you the agency back, but who wants
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00:13:04,130 --> 00:13:05,170
agency without any clients?
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00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:08,080
I give you the opus, pair.
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00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:11,740
You played me. You played yourself.
235
00:13:12,420 --> 00:13:13,900
Every no was perfect.
236
00:13:18,220 --> 00:13:19,740
You're fired, Roger.
237
00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:28,040
Gosh, I feel good. I feel like Albatross
has finally taken flight.
238
00:13:28,300 --> 00:13:29,860
Albatross? Hey.
239
00:13:30,380 --> 00:13:31,440
Hello, Sanjay.
240
00:13:32,510 --> 00:13:37,150
Where's Richard? Uh, don't hello -sun
-jay me, okay? My pitch meeting got
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00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:38,150
canceled.
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00:13:38,310 --> 00:13:41,950
Canceled? Ooh, tough break, guys. Did
you pitch for this moron? I pitched for
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00:13:41,950 --> 00:13:45,550
myself. Oh, that's right, because you're
no good, I'm no good, no man is good
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00:13:45,550 --> 00:13:49,790
enough. Actually, I had a small hand in
making the call. Oh, that's great. Shut
245
00:13:49,790 --> 00:13:51,390
up. You know what you are?
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00:13:51,990 --> 00:13:54,970
You're a slut. Don't you dare use my
sexuality again.
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00:13:55,420 --> 00:13:59,200
I can't even see you with this giant
Laverne Cox -looking person in front of
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00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:01,580
you. What is this, by the way? Is this
like a new lesbian role? Now!
249
00:14:02,780 --> 00:14:07,460
Apologize, you misogynistic little chav.
What the fuck did those words mean? I'm
250
00:14:07,460 --> 00:14:08,880
sorry. I'm a chav. Ow!
251
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:10,640
Ow!
252
00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:12,740
You just watched that whole thing
happen.
253
00:14:13,100 --> 00:14:16,590
God... Damn it. You guys are all, you
all look like fucking Bob Saget with
254
00:14:16,590 --> 00:14:20,030
glasses. Get the fuck out of my sight.
This is not over. You want to go again?
255
00:14:20,170 --> 00:14:22,770
No, I'm walking away. Read the body
language.
256
00:14:23,070 --> 00:14:24,070
Megway coming through.
257
00:14:24,230 --> 00:14:25,310
Robot coming through.
258
00:14:25,510 --> 00:14:26,530
Excuse me. Excuse me.
259
00:14:26,790 --> 00:14:28,830
Not cool, man.
260
00:14:29,430 --> 00:14:32,530
All right. Somebody give me HR and tech
support.
261
00:14:33,050 --> 00:14:34,130
That was awesome.
262
00:14:34,330 --> 00:14:35,330
Holy shit.
263
00:14:35,510 --> 00:14:37,910
I did judo. The community sent that on
Thursday.
264
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:49,200
High five, man.
265
00:14:49,300 --> 00:14:50,300
What? Oh.
266
00:14:50,700 --> 00:14:53,100
Did you win it? I did better than that.
I lost.
267
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:59,040
What? I gave back that which wasn't
mine. I am no longer Enoch Bartlett.
268
00:14:59,740 --> 00:15:00,659
Let's roll.
269
00:15:00,660 --> 00:15:02,280
Um, I have a flight problem.
270
00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:05,220
Well, we didn't get towed, did we? Come
on.
271
00:15:05,500 --> 00:15:06,840
Have a pair day, right?
272
00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:08,360
Shall we roll?
273
00:15:08,860 --> 00:15:09,860
Yeah.
274
00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:11,720
You're kidding me.
275
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,500
I need you to do me a thought, okay? I'm
in Seaspring, Indiana.
276
00:15:16,780 --> 00:15:19,620
It's like Kismet. You know, I was going
to take you on Highway 1. You know what
277
00:15:19,620 --> 00:15:20,339
that is?
278
00:15:20,340 --> 00:15:21,340
I do.
279
00:15:21,860 --> 00:15:22,980
Good luck, Michael Cooper.
280
00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:24,760
Thanks.
281
00:15:26,700 --> 00:15:27,700
Front line.
282
00:15:28,620 --> 00:15:29,620
Yeah,
283
00:15:30,340 --> 00:15:31,239
no, he'll be good.
284
00:15:31,240 --> 00:15:32,240
Pretty sure he's got Uber.
285
00:15:51,020 --> 00:15:52,060
Can't believe this shit.
286
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:55,080
Oh, it's, uh, sunflower nut butter.
287
00:15:55,500 --> 00:15:57,240
Oh, talking about that.
288
00:16:01,060 --> 00:16:02,560
Sorry, guys. I'm out.
289
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:03,800
Come on.
290
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:05,160
This is the opportunity of a lifetime.
291
00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:08,200
My manager got me the white girl track
in Hamilton, okay?
292
00:16:08,620 --> 00:16:10,220
What? You have a manager?
293
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,000
Come on.
294
00:16:13,420 --> 00:16:14,420
Joel.
295
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:16,760
Roger.
296
00:16:17,940 --> 00:16:18,940
Isn't it Roger?
297
00:16:19,860 --> 00:16:20,860
George.
298
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:24,240
Well, I guess we've got an extra seat in
the van.
299
00:16:37,300 --> 00:16:38,320
It's going to be awesome.
300
00:16:41,440 --> 00:16:42,440
Go.
301
00:17:13,829 --> 00:17:15,650
And in turn, how my credit grew in
disproportion.
302
00:17:16,290 --> 00:17:17,290
E -knock -knock.
303
00:17:17,589 --> 00:17:18,650
They all cried.
304
00:17:18,890 --> 00:17:21,050
E -knock -knock. What a great big liar.
305
00:17:21,250 --> 00:17:23,390
Brother was a skin hella brass and
inspired.
306
00:17:23,630 --> 00:17:27,130
Take it away, let's make it yours and
let's all use dire. Now the state saw
307
00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:31,690
manifestation. Not a draft, not a need
for a pedigree son. Not a stance, no
308
00:17:31,690 --> 00:17:33,090
seceding, too much of a caution.
309
00:17:33,310 --> 00:17:36,910
And the time for admission fully slipped
away from. E -knock -knock.
310
00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:39,430
Yeah, E -knock -knock.
311
00:17:39,830 --> 00:17:42,230
What? The fruit -loving Yankees.
312
00:17:43,110 --> 00:17:44,390
The Proof Loving Gang.
313
00:17:45,770 --> 00:17:47,050
Peanut Bartlett.
314
00:17:48,010 --> 00:17:51,930
Go ahead, take a bite. You ain't got to
thank me. Peanut Bartlett.
23184
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