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1
00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:56,092
DYING OF LAUGHTER
2
00:02:44,675 --> 00:02:48,250
Wait a minute! Hey!
Where are you going?
3
00:02:48,594 --> 00:02:50,710
Hey! I need your I.D.!
4
00:02:54,765 --> 00:02:57,215
They're heading
for make-up.
5
00:03:07,482 --> 00:03:09,598
They're here.
My God.
6
00:03:09,817 --> 00:03:13,184
-Who's here?
-Who? Are you stupid? Them.
7
00:03:13,778 --> 00:03:15,935
-Them? Really?
-Of course, you fool.
8
00:03:16,154 --> 00:03:19,813
The genuine, the authentic,
the two and only...
9
00:03:20,032 --> 00:03:22,815
Nino and Bruno.
They're in make-up.
10
00:03:23,493 --> 00:03:24,566
What do we do?
11
00:03:24,827 --> 00:03:28,402
-Nothing. What's wrong?
-What's wrong?
12
00:03:28,663 --> 00:03:30,821
The police are
after them!
13
00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:32,697
Relax.
I'll talk to them.
14
00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:36,241
No, not now.
Come on, get out.
15
00:03:37,794 --> 00:03:39,702
Who the fuck are
these people?
16
00:03:41,005 --> 00:03:43,997
Good. Here we are.
Together again.
17
00:03:44,257 --> 00:03:47,665
The legendary Nino and Bruno,
ready to hit the stage.
18
00:03:48,801 --> 00:03:51,709
You're here to do
the show, right?
19
00:03:53,471 --> 00:03:55,587
Relax, Ricky.
Give us a second.
20
00:03:55,806 --> 00:03:56,911
What about his hair?
21
00:03:57,140 --> 00:03:59,673
Fuck it! We've got
other problems!
22
00:03:59,934 --> 00:04:02,415
Let's go! Maria!
Merche! Get out!
23
00:04:09,024 --> 00:04:11,265
My boys, my boys.
24
00:04:11,734 --> 00:04:14,434
I've dreamed of this
for a long time.
25
00:04:14,861 --> 00:04:18,145
After all that has happened.
Together again.
26
00:04:19,655 --> 00:04:21,521
I'm really getting
emotional.
27
00:04:22,532 --> 00:04:25,097
Look. I have
goose pimples.
28
00:04:27,703 --> 00:04:29,985
Okay. Enough
bullshit.
29
00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:32,571
We're going out
that door
30
00:04:32,789 --> 00:04:36,990
to put on the best
New Year's show ever.
31
00:04:37,418 --> 00:04:39,867
We'll kill them
with laughter.
32
00:04:41,087 --> 00:04:43,484
-You ready?
-When you are.
33
00:04:45,840 --> 00:04:48,957
No, not now. No photos.
Clear the way.
34
00:05:13,734 --> 00:05:15,006
Come on.
35
00:05:16,027 --> 00:05:18,310
Get ready.
Let's go.
36
00:05:24,824 --> 00:05:27,024
No, not now.
After, after.
37
00:05:43,754 --> 00:05:46,537
I have nothing to do with
this. I was forced.
38
00:05:46,756 --> 00:05:47,538
Open the door.
39
00:05:47,840 --> 00:05:51,749
I can't. You see that red
light? They're recording.
40
00:05:52,343 --> 00:05:54,959
This is destruction
of justice.
41
00:05:55,178 --> 00:05:57,711
-Obstruction.
-Don't correct me in public!
42
00:05:58,013 --> 00:06:01,213
Now we're accomplices.
Open the door.
43
00:06:01,432 --> 00:06:05,258
Fuck that. They can arrest
them in half an hour.
44
00:06:05,518 --> 00:06:08,083
Besides, where's their
search warrant?
45
00:06:11,314 --> 00:06:14,723
-That was a shot, man.
-Everything's under control.
46
00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:17,225
It must be part
of the show.
47
00:06:18,945 --> 00:06:21,728
You see? It's a
comedy program.
48
00:06:21,947 --> 00:06:24,188
This show hasn't got
any shooting.
49
00:06:24,448 --> 00:06:26,438
You're right.
Open the damn door.
50
00:06:26,699 --> 00:06:28,356
What's going on
in there?
51
00:06:28,617 --> 00:06:32,307
They're fantastic.
Everyone's laughing.
52
00:06:36,539 --> 00:06:37,613
You fat shit.
53
00:06:43,377 --> 00:06:45,994
I'd rather be fat
than have bad breath.
54
00:06:50,341 --> 00:06:52,874
It's not my breath,
it's your feet.
55
00:06:53,093 --> 00:06:57,085
You can't trust someone who
never washes his feet.
56
00:07:12,730 --> 00:07:14,471
Call an ambulance!
57
00:07:19,819 --> 00:07:21,090
Oh shit!
58
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:35,485
Please, everyone remain calm.
Stay in your seats.
59
00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:39,863
It's all right.
It's all part of the show.
60
00:07:47,129 --> 00:07:49,453
Well, this is the end.
61
00:07:50,798 --> 00:07:53,706
I hate people who say
" I told you so",
62
00:07:54,134 --> 00:07:56,583
but I knew it would
come to this.
63
00:07:57,094 --> 00:08:00,127
I could have even
prevented it. Christ.
64
00:08:01,347 --> 00:08:05,119
It was all my idea. Even
the names, Nino and Bruno.
65
00:08:06,892 --> 00:08:10,300
They'd met before. At least
they say they had.
66
00:08:11,645 --> 00:08:14,386
It all began in a disco
in a small town,
67
00:08:14,605 --> 00:08:16,179
around 1972.
68
00:08:17,316 --> 00:08:19,015
Nino was a singer.
69
00:08:19,317 --> 00:08:22,017
One of those who copied
popular songs.
70
00:08:22,277 --> 00:08:24,602
But his weakness
was Nino Bravo.
71
00:08:25,738 --> 00:08:27,771
Free...
72
00:08:27,990 --> 00:08:32,941
Like the rising sun,
I'm free...
73
00:08:33,327 --> 00:08:35,484
Like the sea.
74
00:08:36,411 --> 00:08:38,319
Free...
75
00:08:38,538 --> 00:08:42,864
Like the bird that
escapes from its cage
76
00:08:43,124 --> 00:08:46,616
and can finally fly.
77
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:49,077
Free...
78
00:08:49,295 --> 00:08:55,539
Like the winds that gather
my sadness and grief,
79
00:08:59,302 --> 00:09:05,879
I'll follow the truth and
I'll finally find freedom.
80
00:09:06,140 --> 00:09:09,507
I'll show you freedom,
you son of a bitch.
81
00:09:10,226 --> 00:09:14,051
Free, like the rising
sun, I'm free,
82
00:09:15,855 --> 00:09:18,471
Like the sea.
83
00:09:19,190 --> 00:09:21,098
Free...
84
00:09:21,317 --> 00:09:23,391
Like the bird
that escapes...
85
00:09:23,694 --> 00:09:25,851
I'd never forget
I owed you money.
86
00:09:28,322 --> 00:09:30,396
Hey, watch your mouth.
87
00:09:31,449 --> 00:09:34,566
I already fucking told
you I'd pay you back!
88
00:09:34,826 --> 00:09:37,984
How much was it again?
That much?
89
00:09:47,334 --> 00:09:50,003
No, no.
Whatever you say.
90
00:09:50,211 --> 00:09:51,785
I'm no good
with money.
91
00:09:53,422 --> 00:09:54,120
Hey, you!
92
00:09:54,631 --> 00:09:56,622
What's up, asshole?
93
00:09:57,925 --> 00:10:01,042
No, nothing.
I'll help you
94
00:10:01,302 --> 00:10:03,043
take those to
the table.
95
00:10:03,429 --> 00:10:05,170
Anything you want.
96
00:10:05,430 --> 00:10:06,619
Go kill somebody!
97
00:10:19,814 --> 00:10:22,598
Thank you, thank you.
And now...
98
00:10:23,525 --> 00:10:24,974
for another
masterpiece
99
00:10:25,235 --> 00:10:28,018
by the great
Nino Bravo.
100
00:10:28,612 --> 00:10:30,979
For all of you...
Noelia.
101
00:10:35,576 --> 00:10:37,608
There's a girl
who's the same
102
00:10:38,870 --> 00:10:41,152
but different
from the rest.
103
00:10:41,621 --> 00:10:43,403
Relax, man.
Let me finish.
104
00:10:44,623 --> 00:10:46,405
I told you I had
the money.
105
00:10:46,624 --> 00:10:49,407
It's almost as if
I had it...
106
00:10:50,502 --> 00:10:52,034
My friend's got it.
107
00:10:53,254 --> 00:10:54,359
Yeah, I'm positive.
108
00:10:54,588 --> 00:10:56,329
He gets paid today.
109
00:10:57,340 --> 00:11:00,707
Yeah, tomorrow at 12.
I'll be there.
110
00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:06,617
...and I only know
her name is Noelia.
111
00:11:09,890 --> 00:11:12,674
I've lived for her
for a long time,
112
00:11:14,017 --> 00:11:17,176
and I only know
her name is Noelia.
113
00:11:17,478 --> 00:11:20,220
-How's it going?
-Weathering the storm.
114
00:11:20,439 --> 00:11:22,013
We're out of
Pachar�n.
115
00:11:22,273 --> 00:11:25,265
Give them whatever you've
got and keep smiling.
116
00:11:25,525 --> 00:11:27,391
I don't want
any trouble.
117
00:11:27,652 --> 00:11:28,840
It seems like
118
00:11:30,279 --> 00:11:32,676
she's going to call me,
119
00:11:33,072 --> 00:11:34,605
then she runs away
120
00:11:35,157 --> 00:11:36,564
without speaking.
121
00:11:36,950 --> 00:11:38,441
I've dreamed of her
122
00:11:38,660 --> 00:11:40,651
for a long time,
123
00:11:43,038 --> 00:11:44,779
and I only know
her name is
124
00:11:45,164 --> 00:11:46,696
Noelia.
125
00:11:49,124 --> 00:11:51,866
I've lived for her
for a long time,
126
00:11:53,544 --> 00:11:55,744
and I only know
her name is
127
00:11:56,296 --> 00:11:58,245
Noelia.
128
00:11:59,131 --> 00:12:02,905
Noelia, Noelia, Noelia.
129
00:12:04,719 --> 00:12:05,667
Noelia, Noelia...
130
00:12:44,579 --> 00:12:46,195
He's killed my girlfriend!
131
00:12:47,456 --> 00:12:50,197
You killed our
company mascot.
132
00:12:50,416 --> 00:12:53,240
-I can't fucking believe it.
-You ruined our manoeuvres.
133
00:12:53,501 --> 00:12:55,242
Bastardo, asesino!
134
00:12:55,961 --> 00:12:59,328
I didn't touch it.
I love animals.
135
00:12:59,547 --> 00:13:01,997
Don't be smart,
asshole.
136
00:13:02,341 --> 00:13:04,707
Easy, now.
Are you sure it's dead?
137
00:13:04,967 --> 00:13:06,291
Maybe you should
give it
138
00:13:06,510 --> 00:13:08,293
mouth to mouth,
you fuckhead.
139
00:13:08,553 --> 00:13:09,919
What have you done?
140
00:13:10,138 --> 00:13:12,535
It wasn't me. Maybe it
had a heart attack.
141
00:13:13,473 --> 00:13:17,164
Relax, boys. Don't get excited.
It was an accident.
142
00:13:17,435 --> 00:13:20,051
Have a drink and calm down.
On the house.
143
00:13:20,937 --> 00:13:22,208
What do you say?
144
00:13:32,361 --> 00:13:33,851
Merry Christmas!
145
00:13:36,113 --> 00:13:38,678
I'm going this way.
146
00:13:38,949 --> 00:13:42,191
Don't worry, the insurance
will cover it.
147
00:13:42,410 --> 00:13:45,526
-What insurance?
-That's true.
148
00:13:47,121 --> 00:13:50,029
Come on, cheer up.
It's no big deal.
149
00:13:50,248 --> 00:13:52,646
They only made you
dance like that goat.
150
00:13:53,083 --> 00:13:54,949
Though making you
eat those flowers...
151
00:13:55,209 --> 00:13:56,867
Especially the
plastic ones.
152
00:13:57,169 --> 00:14:00,161
Shit, you didn't say
how far away you lived.
153
00:14:00,379 --> 00:14:02,829
-Seven more kilometres!
-But it's downhill.
154
00:14:03,257 --> 00:14:04,914
I don't even know
your name.
155
00:14:05,133 --> 00:14:07,749
Joaquin Molina.
But they call me Nino.
156
00:14:08,093 --> 00:14:10,918
Yeah right, after Nino Bravo.
I'm Jose Luis.
157
00:14:11,179 --> 00:14:12,450
After your father?
158
00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:14,838
No, I'm an orphan.
159
00:14:15,056 --> 00:14:16,631
-Sorry.
-It's all right.
160
00:14:16,849 --> 00:14:20,341
I barely remember. You said
you live with your mother.
161
00:14:21,478 --> 00:14:22,802
Not exactly.
162
00:14:25,146 --> 00:14:26,220
-Psycho!
-That's Visir.
163
00:14:26,564 --> 00:14:29,013
It's like living alone.
Visir hates me.
164
00:14:29,232 --> 00:14:30,056
So does my mother.
165
00:14:34,027 --> 00:14:35,184
What's this?
166
00:14:35,862 --> 00:14:38,478
Nothing... they're from
my mom's lingerie shop...
167
00:14:38,697 --> 00:14:40,104
Leftovers from
last season.
168
00:14:40,365 --> 00:14:42,064
They don't fit below.
169
00:14:42,283 --> 00:14:44,983
Relax. You don't
have to explain.
170
00:14:45,785 --> 00:14:46,974
Each to his own.
171
00:14:59,586 --> 00:15:03,078
Listen, Jos� Luis.
I think we have to leave.
172
00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:06,205
Why? We just got here.
173
00:15:06,424 --> 00:15:09,124
My mother doesn't
like strangers.
174
00:15:09,343 --> 00:15:11,667
She'll try to take
my socks off.
175
00:15:11,970 --> 00:15:13,669
-It's not the first time.
-Your socks?
176
00:15:13,888 --> 00:15:15,045
My lucky socks.
177
00:15:17,724 --> 00:15:21,049
They're my good luck charm.
Since I started singing.
178
00:15:21,268 --> 00:15:24,343
-Which was...?
-Two years and 9 months ago.
179
00:15:24,812 --> 00:15:28,221
She hasn't spoken
to me since.
180
00:15:28,648 --> 00:15:32,504
You haven't taken those
off in three years?
181
00:15:32,775 --> 00:15:35,933
Never. Like the cross around
my neck. They bring me luck.
182
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:38,143
Got you far, haven't they?
183
00:15:38,404 --> 00:15:41,729
It sounds ridiculous.
But if I washed them,
184
00:15:41,948 --> 00:15:43,939
they'd lose their
esoteric powers.
185
00:15:44,366 --> 00:15:46,691
I have a plan, so tell
me what you think.
186
00:15:46,952 --> 00:15:49,234
Tomorrow we're
going to Madrid.
187
00:15:49,495 --> 00:15:50,277
Madrid? Why?
188
00:15:50,496 --> 00:15:54,436
To get you out of here, that's why.
You can't stay here.
189
00:15:54,665 --> 00:15:57,949
Besides, the club is going
to be closed a while.
190
00:15:58,585 --> 00:16:01,409
But what will
we do there?
191
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:03,076
You're a singer,
right?
192
00:16:03,712 --> 00:16:04,734
Yeah, but...
193
00:16:04,963 --> 00:16:07,872
I have a friend from
San Ildefonso School...
194
00:16:08,132 --> 00:16:09,373
That's where
they sing...
195
00:16:09,633 --> 00:16:11,999
The lottery numbers. I did
it twice... So this guy
196
00:16:12,302 --> 00:16:14,084
did a casting
for a TV show.
197
00:16:14,428 --> 00:16:15,252
A "castis"?
198
00:16:15,471 --> 00:16:17,128
"Casting".
It's English.
199
00:16:17,347 --> 00:16:19,880
My English is
pretty basic.
200
00:16:20,099 --> 00:16:22,215
Hello, good morning,
arrivederci...
201
00:16:22,434 --> 00:16:25,134
No, it's for performers.
It's a contest.
202
00:16:27,479 --> 00:16:28,803
And leave my mother?
203
00:16:29,856 --> 00:16:32,846
Look, Joaquin.
It's time to grow up
204
00:16:33,107 --> 00:16:34,639
and live your
own life.
205
00:16:37,402 --> 00:16:40,070
Hey, I'm here because
I want to be.
206
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:42,885
I could have left
a million times.
207
00:16:43,114 --> 00:16:46,273
I don't need you,
or your "castrins".
208
00:16:48,660 --> 00:16:51,328
I'm with my mother
because I love her.
209
00:16:51,912 --> 00:16:54,528
Even if she doesn't
talk to me.
210
00:16:55,623 --> 00:16:58,656
Since my father died
I'm all she has.
211
00:16:58,875 --> 00:17:01,658
-Are you coming or not?
-Of course I am.
212
00:17:04,628 --> 00:17:06,786
Let's go! Don't piss me off!
Goddammit!
213
00:17:07,005 --> 00:17:09,486
Let's hurry this
up, please!
214
00:17:09,924 --> 00:17:12,207
The ventriloquists
can leave.
215
00:17:12,425 --> 00:17:15,542
Comics and impersonators!
No fucking dolls!
216
00:17:15,761 --> 00:17:18,920
Hey! The shark doesn't
go there, you shithead!
217
00:17:19,430 --> 00:17:21,880
What the fuck is this?
You. Out.
218
00:17:22,099 --> 00:17:25,633
You see? Comics and
impersonators. No singers.
219
00:17:25,893 --> 00:17:28,218
So? You're an
impersonator.
220
00:17:28,437 --> 00:17:30,094
What do you mean?
221
00:17:30,313 --> 00:17:32,137
-You do Nino Bravo.
-No, I don't.
222
00:17:32,356 --> 00:17:34,754
I use his songs.
It's different.
223
00:17:34,983 --> 00:17:38,808
You copy his voice,
his songs, his clothes...
224
00:17:39,026 --> 00:17:42,852
-It's in homage.
-So you're a homager.
225
00:17:43,446 --> 00:17:45,844
As long as it
makes them laugh.
226
00:17:46,073 --> 00:17:48,554
But why does it
have to be funny?
227
00:17:48,783 --> 00:17:50,899
I'm a singer.
And what are you?
228
00:17:51,118 --> 00:17:54,610
They might need a good-looking
host for the program.
229
00:17:54,829 --> 00:17:55,611
You're an actor?
230
00:17:55,830 --> 00:17:58,071
Sure. I was in
"55 Days in Peking."
231
00:17:58,332 --> 00:17:59,603
-As an actor?
-As a Chinaman.
232
00:17:59,833 --> 00:18:02,908
One of 5000. You can
just barely see me.
233
00:18:03,127 --> 00:18:04,868
I was near the front.
234
00:18:05,086 --> 00:18:07,244
Where the fuck
are the Romans?
235
00:18:07,463 --> 00:18:09,860
So you'd take any
job they offer.
236
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:13,946
Once we get a foot in
the door we can change.
237
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:15,874
-It won't work.
-Look at those legs.
238
00:18:16,093 --> 00:18:18,334
Have you ever seen
legs that long?
239
00:18:18,553 --> 00:18:21,962
No fucking way. It's
already worth the trip.
240
00:18:22,181 --> 00:18:24,088
We've got nothing
to lose.
241
00:18:24,391 --> 00:18:27,716
In person they look bigger.
So juicy...
242
00:18:28,310 --> 00:18:31,344
-and soft on top.
-Because it's flesh, not plastic.
243
00:18:31,562 --> 00:18:33,262
Right there,
a step away.
244
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,430
My God!
They're moving!
245
00:18:35,649 --> 00:18:36,837
You could just
reach out
246
00:18:37,108 --> 00:18:38,265
and stroke those
thighs.
247
00:18:38,484 --> 00:18:41,266
-Don't say thighs.
-Thighs, thighs, thighs.
248
00:18:42,027 --> 00:18:42,809
Shit!
249
00:18:43,070 --> 00:18:45,738
Ask whatever you want
of me but... comedy!
250
00:18:46,155 --> 00:18:48,146
What's wrong?
Women love comics.
251
00:18:48,490 --> 00:18:51,190
What if nobody laughs?
How embarrassing!
252
00:18:51,450 --> 00:18:54,150
You can't be a
tight-ass forever.
253
00:18:54,536 --> 00:18:58,653
Okay. We go in, we make fools
of ourselves, we leave.
254
00:18:58,872 --> 00:18:59,779
-Happy?
-Happy.
255
00:19:01,166 --> 00:19:03,782
Look, I never said
it was for sure.
256
00:19:04,001 --> 00:19:06,399
I said your chances
were good.
257
00:19:06,628 --> 00:19:09,077
What I can't do
is work miracles.
258
00:19:09,421 --> 00:19:11,246
It's you who'll
need a miracle!
259
00:19:11,465 --> 00:19:13,580
First we want
our money back.
260
00:19:13,799 --> 00:19:17,791
Those are sign-up fees. You
have to be more convincing.
261
00:19:18,052 --> 00:19:20,084
Did you think it
would be easy?
262
00:19:20,387 --> 00:19:23,170
But we didn't even perform.
They told us to go home.
263
00:19:24,514 --> 00:19:26,672
-They said that?
-That's right.
264
00:19:27,558 --> 00:19:31,384
Well, in that case...
I'll be straight with you.
265
00:19:31,644 --> 00:19:34,125
They didn't like you.
266
00:19:34,396 --> 00:19:37,972
-Maybe it was the outfits.
-They're traditional.
267
00:19:38,232 --> 00:19:41,923
I know, but they need some
glitter, something shiny...
268
00:19:42,194 --> 00:19:44,101
-I'll give you something shiny.
-Hey, relax.
269
00:19:44,319 --> 00:19:47,269
Calm down, this won't
get us anywhere.
270
00:19:48,364 --> 00:19:52,356
Look. At this point all
I can do is go in there,
271
00:19:52,908 --> 00:19:56,849
and talk to Chicho, who happens
to be a friend of mine.
272
00:19:57,161 --> 00:20:01,529
If there's a second round of
casting your act could get picked.
273
00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:05,699
If there isn't your
ass gets kicked.
274
00:20:21,261 --> 00:20:23,742
Let's not get carried
away, girls.
275
00:20:24,096 --> 00:20:27,129
That's fine.
Thank you very much.
276
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:31,580
-Can we sing another?
-Like " lrai litol player."
277
00:20:31,852 --> 00:20:34,551
Thanks, but that's enough.
278
00:20:35,854 --> 00:20:37,970
Ventriloquists!
Through this door.
279
00:20:41,900 --> 00:20:42,849
Let's see,
next up.
280
00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:44,975
Joaquin Molina and
Jos� Luis Exp�sito.
281
00:20:45,236 --> 00:20:46,893
Come on.
It's our turn.
282
00:20:47,321 --> 00:20:50,437
First the joke about
Christ in the desert.
283
00:20:50,697 --> 00:20:52,897
Then sing that " Free"
thing you do so well.
284
00:20:54,575 --> 00:20:57,316
Is there another exit
around here?
285
00:20:58,036 --> 00:21:00,277
They're casting
the comedians.
286
00:21:00,662 --> 00:21:03,196
-Those are comedians?
-So they say.
287
00:21:03,873 --> 00:21:04,947
They suck.
288
00:21:05,166 --> 00:21:07,449
The chubby one
is adorable.
289
00:21:07,709 --> 00:21:10,534
-The other one's sexy.
-They're hilarious.
290
00:21:11,587 --> 00:21:14,453
They said no dolls?
Well, he's human!
291
00:21:15,173 --> 00:21:16,663
At times you can't tell,
292
00:21:16,966 --> 00:21:20,081
but depending on
the circumstances,
293
00:21:20,300 --> 00:21:22,375
he even looks
human, right?
294
00:21:23,011 --> 00:21:25,752
He even studies
and knows things.
295
00:21:25,971 --> 00:21:27,211
He's tenacious.
296
00:21:28,723 --> 00:21:31,548
Why am I saying this?
Well, why not?
297
00:21:33,935 --> 00:21:36,051
-What happened?
-You screwed it up.
298
00:21:36,270 --> 00:21:40,127
Shit! I forgot what Christ
was doing in the desert.
299
00:21:40,356 --> 00:21:42,889
Forget it. You can make
the 1 2:00 bus.
300
00:21:43,150 --> 00:21:45,975
-You're not coming?
-No, I'm staying.
301
00:21:46,652 --> 00:21:49,435
-What will you do?
-I'll find a job.
302
00:21:49,654 --> 00:21:51,479
-As a waiter?
-No, never again.
303
00:21:51,739 --> 00:21:53,854
-Well, what?
-I don't know.
304
00:21:54,073 --> 00:21:57,232
But, look. Admit it.
I'm not funny.
305
00:21:57,450 --> 00:22:00,400
I laugh, but I don't
even get the jokes.
306
00:22:00,661 --> 00:22:02,986
And you just chase women.
307
00:22:03,246 --> 00:22:05,237
That's not funny.
It's pathetic.
308
00:22:05,456 --> 00:22:07,239
What great vibes!
309
00:22:07,458 --> 00:22:10,866
I'm not being negative.
Look at these people.
310
00:22:11,085 --> 00:22:14,744
Their lives are boring. And
though it's hard to admit,
311
00:22:14,963 --> 00:22:17,204
we're just like them.
312
00:22:17,423 --> 00:22:19,539
I see why your mom
won't talk to you.
313
00:22:20,050 --> 00:22:23,667
It's not like you have
a fairy godmother
314
00:22:23,885 --> 00:22:25,834
to save your ass.
315
00:22:26,095 --> 00:22:28,794
Can I speak to you
two for a second?
316
00:22:29,013 --> 00:22:32,214
-We're busy. What do you want?
-I'm your fairy godmother.
317
00:22:33,225 --> 00:22:37,509
Hern�n Cort�s conquered
an empire on guts alone.
318
00:22:37,728 --> 00:22:40,803
Where was he from? A little
town in Extramadura.
319
00:22:41,022 --> 00:22:42,638
He was unknown
in Madrid.
320
00:22:42,856 --> 00:22:44,305
-What's he on about?
-I don't know.
321
00:22:44,524 --> 00:22:46,015
What is this?
322
00:22:46,234 --> 00:22:50,226
We just want to get in show
business, not conquer America.
323
00:22:50,529 --> 00:22:54,385
That's why I brought you here,
to show you the best.
324
00:22:54,698 --> 00:22:55,688
Fof� the clown!
325
00:22:56,907 --> 00:22:59,732
-Are you kidding?
-Look, son. I forgive you,
326
00:22:59,993 --> 00:23:01,942
because you're
obviously ignorant.
327
00:23:02,161 --> 00:23:06,528
These people are the top of show
business, the cr�me de la cr�me.
328
00:23:07,248 --> 00:23:10,531
That man says " How are you?"
on TV, and all of Spain screams
329
00:23:10,792 --> 00:23:12,157
" Fine".
330
00:23:12,376 --> 00:23:16,952
But these people had
training, a teacher...
331
00:23:18,089 --> 00:23:19,704
I'm the teacher.
332
00:23:19,923 --> 00:23:21,330
-Of all of them?
-Of the best.
333
00:23:21,591 --> 00:23:25,709
These, for example. You think the
hat and tails were their idea?
334
00:23:26,094 --> 00:23:27,418
It was all
my idea.
335
00:23:27,637 --> 00:23:31,409
And their name? They called
themselves "The Funny Couple".
336
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:35,454
I told them, " No way. Tip and Coll."
It's catchy. Tip and Coll.
337
00:23:35,850 --> 00:23:37,841
-It is catchy.
-Of course it's catchy.
338
00:23:38,310 --> 00:23:41,510
Imagine, "Ortega and Gassett".
Not a chance.
339
00:23:41,729 --> 00:23:43,679
The name's the most
important thing.
340
00:23:43,897 --> 00:23:45,763
So you're Tipp and
Coll's agent?
341
00:23:46,024 --> 00:23:49,516
I didn't say that.
We were like... brothers,
342
00:23:49,860 --> 00:23:53,102
before all the big shows.
But that's another story.
343
00:23:53,571 --> 00:23:56,021
We'll do our own thing.
344
00:23:56,281 --> 00:23:58,230
Do you want to
give it a shot?
345
00:23:58,825 --> 00:24:01,065
You think we'd
be good comics?
346
00:24:01,325 --> 00:24:02,858
Right now you suck,
347
00:24:03,118 --> 00:24:04,390
truth be told.
348
00:24:04,661 --> 00:24:08,070
But, there's something there,
a feeling...
349
00:24:08,330 --> 00:24:10,895
So now we have an agent,
like the big stars.
350
00:24:11,124 --> 00:24:14,950
Hold on, kid. Only a lucky
few get to be big stars.
351
00:24:15,168 --> 00:24:18,369
You have to work your ass off,
from the bottom up,
352
00:24:18,588 --> 00:24:21,204
polishing your jokes as if
they were diamonds,
353
00:24:21,465 --> 00:24:23,497
until they're perfect.
354
00:24:23,883 --> 00:24:26,280
It's slave labour.
I'll destroy you.
355
00:24:26,551 --> 00:24:27,375
When do we start?
356
00:24:27,719 --> 00:24:29,251
We already have.
357
00:24:43,604 --> 00:24:47,013
Christ is driving a Seat 600.
What happens?
358
00:24:47,232 --> 00:24:49,389
Christ is driving...
in the desert...
359
00:24:49,608 --> 00:24:53,017
He sees Muhammad, who asks him:
"Seen any mountains?"
360
00:24:53,278 --> 00:24:56,645
It sounds like you're the one
they fucking crucified!
361
00:24:56,863 --> 00:24:59,344
Liven it up a bit.
Try to have fun.
362
00:24:59,991 --> 00:25:02,148
Christ is in
the desert...
363
00:25:02,534 --> 00:25:04,931
and he sees Muhammad...
who asks him...
364
00:25:05,619 --> 00:25:08,183
-"Seen any..."
-Are you stupid?
365
00:25:08,412 --> 00:25:11,863
-Never laugh at your own jokes.
-That's comic suicide.
366
00:25:12,082 --> 00:25:14,990
-We've rehearsed it 100 times.
-I know, but...
367
00:25:15,584 --> 00:25:17,075
-But what?
-No buts.
368
00:26:31,260 --> 00:26:32,449
-I'm leaving.
-Wait.
369
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:34,419
-You have your socks?
-Of course.
370
00:26:34,638 --> 00:26:37,921
-So what's the fucking problem?
-I don't get the joke.
371
00:26:38,140 --> 00:26:41,006
I don't get why Christ
is driving a Seat 600.
372
00:26:41,225 --> 00:26:43,966
Why a 600?
Because you say so?
373
00:26:45,853 --> 00:26:49,262
Hey! It's a 600!
It's obvious, isn't it?
374
00:26:49,939 --> 00:26:52,180
It doesn't matter.
Forget it.
375
00:26:52,399 --> 00:26:55,224
Start with the studdering
faggot who says:
376
00:26:55,443 --> 00:26:57,726
"g-g-g-g-roovy" and
ends up in a convent.
377
00:26:57,945 --> 00:27:00,311
-I can't, I can't.
-But everyone gets it.
378
00:27:00,863 --> 00:27:04,314
Relax, they'll laugh.
Don't be afraid.
379
00:27:08,119 --> 00:27:10,683
Back off!
Get back, you bastards!
380
00:27:11,286 --> 00:27:12,861
Come on, run!
381
00:27:13,246 --> 00:27:15,529
I'll never do this again!
382
00:27:16,207 --> 00:27:19,282
Let's go. It's your turn.
383
00:27:19,542 --> 00:27:21,408
Good luck, good luck.
384
00:27:25,463 --> 00:27:27,329
And now, two exceptional
comedians...
385
00:27:27,548 --> 00:27:30,456
The hilarious, Nino...
386
00:27:31,801 --> 00:27:33,500
Bruno and Nino!
387
00:27:35,887 --> 00:27:37,378
I'm Bruno?
388
00:27:37,972 --> 00:27:39,379
Good evening,
everyone.
389
00:27:41,516 --> 00:27:43,589
It's a pleasure
to be here
390
00:27:43,892 --> 00:27:44,965
for this intimate
391
00:27:45,226 --> 00:27:46,216
Local celebration.
392
00:27:46,435 --> 00:27:47,457
Show us your tits!
393
00:27:48,228 --> 00:27:51,053
Well, I see there's another
comic out there.
394
00:27:51,606 --> 00:27:54,681
But I think tonight two
is enough. Right, Nino?
395
00:27:56,776 --> 00:27:58,100
Say something.
Anything.
396
00:27:58,402 --> 00:28:00,143
Christ was...
was...
397
00:28:03,906 --> 00:28:05,813
Come on!
Say something!
398
00:28:06,032 --> 00:28:08,941
Don't believe this means
he has nothing to say.
399
00:28:09,451 --> 00:28:12,401
He's actually a
joke-telling machine.
400
00:28:12,704 --> 00:28:15,184
He knows them all.
It's just that,
401
00:28:15,413 --> 00:28:16,987
a smart crowd makes
him nervous.
402
00:28:17,206 --> 00:28:18,780
He's "The Autistic Comic."
403
00:28:19,666 --> 00:28:21,032
Asshole!
404
00:28:23,419 --> 00:28:26,118
You see this face
of an imbecile?
405
00:28:26,713 --> 00:28:30,163
Well, he might be thinking
of a joke to tell.
406
00:28:30,424 --> 00:28:34,197
Maybe, the one about
the studdering faggot?
407
00:28:35,510 --> 00:28:38,377
Are you going to
tell us the joke?
408
00:28:46,643 --> 00:28:49,207
Smack him and see
if he wakes up!
409
00:28:49,811 --> 00:28:53,220
Normally we don't take requests
from the audience,
410
00:28:53,439 --> 00:28:55,888
but tonight we might
make an exception.
411
00:28:56,816 --> 00:28:59,266
Christ... 600...
Christ...
412
00:28:59,526 --> 00:29:03,383
We're going to perform an
exercise in reanimation.
413
00:29:04,447 --> 00:29:07,313
Nino, are you going
to tell the joke?
414
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:18,071
Come on, Nino.
415
00:29:19,331 --> 00:29:21,113
What's up,
mosquito-brain?
416
00:29:40,054 --> 00:29:42,003
-Hit me again.
-What?
417
00:29:42,222 --> 00:29:44,171
They're laughing.
Hit me again.
418
00:29:47,392 --> 00:29:49,050
That moment I realised.
419
00:29:51,269 --> 00:29:54,845
A slap in the face.
So simple. So brutal.
420
00:29:55,939 --> 00:29:57,127
So absurd.
421
00:29:58,524 --> 00:30:01,975
Slap after slap. People
laughed their heads off.
422
00:30:02,402 --> 00:30:05,352
That slap was an act
of total anarchy.
423
00:30:05,613 --> 00:30:08,563
"The liberation of
all ethical compromise"...
424
00:30:08,781 --> 00:30:10,772
as one newspaper
put it.
425
00:30:18,246 --> 00:30:21,405
Bruno did on stage what
we've all wanted to do.
426
00:30:21,624 --> 00:30:25,282
Slap someone with impunity,
with indifference,
427
00:30:25,542 --> 00:30:27,158
without being
punished.
428
00:30:28,544 --> 00:30:32,287
Villalpando, Toledo,
Malaga, Torremolinos.
429
00:30:32,589 --> 00:30:35,456
Always the same effect.
Like pressing a button.
430
00:30:35,966 --> 00:30:38,333
To slap our boss,
our mother-in-law,
431
00:30:38,593 --> 00:30:40,709
the President,
the Pope.
432
00:30:40,928 --> 00:30:44,045
Yes, it was strangely
immoral. Sinister, even.
433
00:30:44,264 --> 00:30:47,005
But isn't that true of
all life's pleasures?
434
00:31:01,442 --> 00:31:04,225
Shit, Gila.
I'm telling you, fuck!
435
00:31:04,444 --> 00:31:07,269
Look. Don't tell
anyone this, but...
436
00:31:07,529 --> 00:31:09,729
without me he's nobody.
You got it?
437
00:31:09,948 --> 00:31:12,772
I even told you about
the phone, shit.
438
00:31:13,033 --> 00:31:14,357
Yeah, the phone.
439
00:31:14,618 --> 00:31:16,900
That was my idea,
you know?
440
00:31:17,161 --> 00:31:19,558
-Is this from Ibiza?
-You like my ring?
441
00:31:19,830 --> 00:31:22,310
Let's go out to my car.
Feeling naughty?
442
00:31:22,540 --> 00:31:23,697
Before you
get drunk...
443
00:31:25,250 --> 00:31:27,157
I want to talk
to you alone.
444
00:31:28,251 --> 00:31:30,451
-You like the blond, eh?
-Shut up, silly.
445
00:31:31,170 --> 00:31:33,203
Yeah, but...
it's about the act.
446
00:31:33,713 --> 00:31:35,746
Forget the act.
Live a little.
447
00:31:36,048 --> 00:31:38,331
That's my intention.
448
00:31:38,550 --> 00:31:40,541
That's why I need
to know.
449
00:31:41,385 --> 00:31:42,209
Know what?
450
00:31:42,845 --> 00:31:45,586
When will you stop
slapping me?
451
00:31:45,889 --> 00:31:49,047
Never. That's the
key to our success.
452
00:31:49,308 --> 00:31:52,800
I know. But we could
make a little change.
453
00:31:53,561 --> 00:31:54,666
For example?
454
00:31:56,021 --> 00:31:59,345
Well, I could slap
you sometimes.
455
00:32:00,148 --> 00:32:02,430
But that's not
funny at all.
456
00:32:02,774 --> 00:32:04,015
Not funny?
457
00:32:04,275 --> 00:32:06,944
No, the cute guy has
to slap the ugly guy.
458
00:32:07,569 --> 00:32:09,185
Why are you
the cute guy?
459
00:32:09,529 --> 00:32:11,895
Come on, Nino.
Try to be objective.
460
00:32:13,699 --> 00:32:17,472
Excuse me, I want to ask a favour.
My friend's ashamed.
461
00:32:17,702 --> 00:32:18,807
You may be right
after all.
462
00:32:19,870 --> 00:32:21,569
Sure. Anything.
463
00:32:22,538 --> 00:32:25,405
Well... I'd like
to do it to you.
464
00:32:25,957 --> 00:32:28,032
" Do it to you"?
She's all yours.
465
00:32:28,292 --> 00:32:29,199
Do what to me?
466
00:32:33,587 --> 00:32:36,495
-I didn't hurt you, did l?
-She's wanted to ever since
467
00:32:36,756 --> 00:32:37,746
she first saw you.
468
00:32:37,965 --> 00:32:41,207
You were born for this.
It's an animal attraction.
469
00:32:41,426 --> 00:32:42,875
His face begs
to be slapped.
470
00:32:43,093 --> 00:32:45,835
Right, girls?
Come on, let's dance.
471
00:33:02,482 --> 00:33:06,140
-Sorry, I got the wrong...
-Hey, you're Bruno!
472
00:33:06,401 --> 00:33:10,059
No, I'm Nino.
Bruno's the funny one.
473
00:33:10,320 --> 00:33:13,895
Hi. I'm Laura. And I think
you're funnier.
474
00:33:14,114 --> 00:33:15,355
You deserve credit.
475
00:33:15,574 --> 00:33:17,690
-You think so?
-Yes.
476
00:33:18,242 --> 00:33:21,693
It's that face you make.
How do you do it?
477
00:33:22,704 --> 00:33:25,268
I don't know.
It's natural.
478
00:33:26,331 --> 00:33:28,322
His name is known
in all the world.
479
00:33:32,002 --> 00:33:36,243
He has very special powers.
Today he'll demonstrate.
480
00:33:36,462 --> 00:33:40,288
What will Uri Geller
show us tonight?
481
00:33:47,220 --> 00:33:48,294
He says
482
00:33:48,513 --> 00:33:52,203
he will show us what made
him famous in the world.
483
00:33:53,933 --> 00:33:55,257
He says on the table...
484
00:33:56,101 --> 00:34:00,010
He says there are many spoons,
not his spoons, obviously ours.
485
00:34:00,396 --> 00:34:01,720
We've met before.
486
00:34:01,980 --> 00:34:03,054
-Really?
-Yeah.
487
00:34:03,356 --> 00:34:05,181
I'll give you a hint.
488
00:34:09,151 --> 00:34:10,339
In that contest.
489
00:34:11,986 --> 00:34:15,478
You had the same glasses,
and your legs...
490
00:34:16,156 --> 00:34:18,022
I saw your audition.
You were great.
491
00:34:18,241 --> 00:34:19,857
Ah, that was nothing.
492
00:34:20,075 --> 00:34:22,066
But you were so
clear about it.
493
00:34:22,494 --> 00:34:25,861
Well, the idea,
the germ was there.
494
00:34:26,330 --> 00:34:30,270
Later we polished it, because
humour is like a diamond.
495
00:34:30,499 --> 00:34:32,365
You have to polish it.
496
00:34:32,584 --> 00:34:34,659
It's admirable to
know what you want.
497
00:34:34,878 --> 00:34:38,119
First I wanted to be a
missionary, then an actress.
498
00:34:38,379 --> 00:34:39,745
Now I study law.
499
00:34:40,172 --> 00:34:41,329
To be a lawyer?
500
00:34:41,590 --> 00:34:42,663
No, to go on strike.
501
00:34:43,466 --> 00:34:45,207
Don't tell anyone,
but I'm in the C.N.T...
502
00:34:45,426 --> 00:34:48,501
An anarchist! You could
go to jail for that.
503
00:34:49,595 --> 00:34:53,713
I hope so. It might be the
only safe place in the future.
504
00:34:54,390 --> 00:34:57,674
Unbelievable! Missionary,
revolutionary...
505
00:34:58,101 --> 00:34:59,717
and you're, well...
506
00:35:00,353 --> 00:35:02,094
you don't look
like an activist.
507
00:35:02,313 --> 00:35:03,553
Can I do something?
508
00:35:05,398 --> 00:35:06,638
It depends.
509
00:35:06,857 --> 00:35:08,557
I won't hurt you.
510
00:35:16,113 --> 00:35:17,478
What was that for?
511
00:35:18,406 --> 00:35:20,564
I like men who
make me laugh.
512
00:35:21,116 --> 00:35:23,514
Yeah? Well, I know
many jokes.
513
00:35:23,827 --> 00:35:27,600
The studdering faggot, and
Christ driving a Seat 600...
514
00:35:27,996 --> 00:35:30,071
in the desert...
and Muhammad...
515
00:35:30,331 --> 00:35:33,114
Silence!
Everyone shut up!
516
00:35:33,542 --> 00:35:35,283
-Silence!
-Who's that?
517
00:35:35,502 --> 00:35:36,992
Some drunk.
518
00:35:37,211 --> 00:35:38,399
He wanted to be
a singer.
519
00:35:38,670 --> 00:35:42,287
I said no, man.
Bend spoons.
520
00:35:42,505 --> 00:35:45,070
Pass these around.
521
00:35:47,301 --> 00:35:49,083
Look.
Take the spoon.
522
00:35:53,013 --> 00:35:54,795
Take the spoon.
523
00:35:55,473 --> 00:35:56,713
Get another.
524
00:35:56,932 --> 00:36:00,706
Forks? No way! But spoons?
A fucking great idea!
525
00:36:01,227 --> 00:36:05,720
Look. This guy's a friend...
a friend... until death.
526
00:36:07,064 --> 00:36:09,806
Look, look, look. Do it.
Fuck. You do it.
527
00:36:28,870 --> 00:36:30,695
I'll teach you to use
your tongue.
528
00:36:35,083 --> 00:36:36,991
No, don't listen to him.
529
00:36:37,460 --> 00:36:38,481
Look, look, look.
Fuck.
530
00:36:43,297 --> 00:36:45,163
It's cold.
Completely cold.
531
00:37:04,686 --> 00:37:06,969
He bent the spoon!
532
00:37:07,605 --> 00:37:09,721
This guy has powers.
533
00:37:10,149 --> 00:37:11,764
This guy has powers!
534
00:37:57,597 --> 00:37:58,702
Die, fucker!
535
00:37:58,931 --> 00:38:01,089
-Are you crazy?
-What's she doing here?
536
00:38:01,308 --> 00:38:02,413
-Who?
-Laura.
537
00:38:02,809 --> 00:38:04,883
Laura?
Her name's Laura?
538
00:38:05,102 --> 00:38:07,499
That's right, asshole.
She studies law.
539
00:38:07,729 --> 00:38:09,219
-You know her?
-Before you.
540
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:12,430
-Wild, isn't she?
-Shut up. Don't say that.
541
00:38:12,774 --> 00:38:14,390
How could you fuck
me over like this?
542
00:38:14,609 --> 00:38:17,934
What, is she an old girlfriend
from school?
543
00:38:18,945 --> 00:38:22,186
You fuck before you
even ask her name?
544
00:38:22,738 --> 00:38:25,063
With women you
have two options.
545
00:38:25,323 --> 00:38:29,775
Please, spare me the
neighbourhood stud speech.
546
00:38:30,077 --> 00:38:31,401
You need to hear it.
547
00:38:33,121 --> 00:38:37,530
You can either be the nice
little friend and get nothing,
548
00:38:38,041 --> 00:38:41,866
or you can get to the
point and get laid.
549
00:38:42,127 --> 00:38:44,160
Let them see your aura,
550
00:38:45,171 --> 00:38:48,538
your magnetism that says...
" I want to fuck."
551
00:38:49,090 --> 00:38:50,873
" I want to fuck."
552
00:38:51,342 --> 00:38:53,041
-That's what they understand.
-And that's it.
553
00:38:53,260 --> 00:38:55,740
No, later you can have
a drink, go to a movie...
554
00:38:55,969 --> 00:38:56,991
You don't know
what love is.
555
00:38:57,220 --> 00:38:57,877
And you do.
556
00:38:58,096 --> 00:39:02,088
No, but I sense it. Even in
the bathroom with a magazine.
557
00:39:02,307 --> 00:39:03,756
But you're like a cork.
558
00:39:05,017 --> 00:39:06,341
You screw once
and get dumped.
559
00:39:06,685 --> 00:39:08,301
Watch it.
Nobody dumps me.
560
00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:09,885
-Yeah, sure.
-What do you mean, sure?
561
00:39:10,604 --> 00:39:13,221
She won't put up with
you for even a week.
562
00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:16,306
Nobody can. Except me,
though I don't know why.
563
00:39:16,525 --> 00:39:17,932
-You want to bet?
-Anything you want.
564
00:39:18,235 --> 00:39:20,976
-If she leaves me in a week...
-We change our name.
565
00:39:21,195 --> 00:39:24,687
-You'd like to be Bruno, eh?
-No, dumbshit. The order.
566
00:39:24,906 --> 00:39:28,845
Instead of Bruno and Nino,
Nino and Bruno sounds better.
567
00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,066
So that's it.
You're jealous.
568
00:39:31,285 --> 00:39:33,953
You're the one who
arranged the names.
569
00:39:34,162 --> 00:39:36,236
Okay. If I lose,
we change the order.
570
00:39:36,455 --> 00:39:38,988
But if you lose, those socks
go in the fucking trash.
571
00:39:39,249 --> 00:39:40,489
My... my socks?
572
00:39:40,708 --> 00:39:43,032
Yeah, your lucky
socks that stink.
573
00:39:43,251 --> 00:39:46,076
We'll burn them and
dance around the fire.
574
00:39:46,504 --> 00:39:50,444
In one week your little
reign will be over.
575
00:39:50,673 --> 00:39:53,498
In one week I won't have
to explain that smell
576
00:39:53,717 --> 00:39:57,001
of rotting dead sheep!
You prim little shit.
577
00:39:57,220 --> 00:39:58,167
I'd rather be prim
578
00:39:58,469 --> 00:39:59,626
than a crude scumbag.
579
00:40:00,179 --> 00:40:01,336
Am I interrupting?
580
00:40:02,472 --> 00:40:04,755
I didn't know you
were rehearsing.
581
00:40:26,364 --> 00:40:29,939
So three more days here
and then to Toledo.
582
00:40:30,157 --> 00:40:32,190
-Great, Juli�n.
-You can meet my cousins.
583
00:40:32,451 --> 00:40:34,567
They work with the
Bullfighting Fireman.
584
00:40:34,827 --> 00:40:37,652
But when are we
going to Madrid?
585
00:40:37,871 --> 00:40:39,060
-Why Madrid?
-Why do you think?
586
00:40:39,331 --> 00:40:41,697
For the hookers?
For some fucking exposure.
587
00:40:41,957 --> 00:40:44,032
What's with you?
Are you mistreated?
588
00:40:44,251 --> 00:40:45,908
I'm treated great.
589
00:40:46,169 --> 00:40:49,035
All these places belong
to your relatives.
590
00:40:49,254 --> 00:40:51,245
Your cousin, or your
brother in law.
591
00:40:51,839 --> 00:40:53,747
Are you too good
for all this?
592
00:40:54,133 --> 00:40:56,958
No, but I hope you have
relatives in Madrid,
593
00:40:57,218 --> 00:40:59,001
or else we'll
never go.
594
00:40:59,220 --> 00:41:01,419
So you want to go
to Madrid?
595
00:41:02,929 --> 00:41:06,703
Fine, right fucking now.
I'll make a few calls.
596
00:41:06,974 --> 00:41:09,507
But don't count on me.
I'm out.
597
00:41:09,726 --> 00:41:11,175
What are you saying?
598
00:41:11,769 --> 00:41:15,136
-Am I your manager?
-Of course you are.
599
00:41:15,355 --> 00:41:19,556
We're nobody without you.
Like Gila. Like Tip and Coll.
600
00:41:20,108 --> 00:41:21,849
Then we go when
I say so, got it?
601
00:41:23,778 --> 00:41:25,352
We have to polish
the act...
602
00:41:25,612 --> 00:41:28,010
-Like a diamond.
-Exactly.
603
00:41:28,239 --> 00:41:31,929
It has to be tight. You don't
have any tits to hide behind.
604
00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:34,868
We'll show them.
And if it's not funny,
605
00:41:35,118 --> 00:41:37,515
it's over. Fuck it.
That's the business.
606
00:41:37,953 --> 00:41:40,403
-Is that clear?
-Very clear, Juli�n.
607
00:41:40,622 --> 00:41:43,290
Then enough bullshit.
Today we rehearse.
608
00:41:43,499 --> 00:41:44,572
I can't today.
609
00:41:44,791 --> 00:41:45,698
What do you mean?
610
00:41:45,917 --> 00:41:48,200
-I have a meeting.
-With whom?
611
00:41:48,419 --> 00:41:51,119
Why should I explain?
Someone, that's all.
612
00:41:51,546 --> 00:41:52,495
Hi.
613
00:41:54,131 --> 00:41:57,123
The demonstration is
at six. We can get
614
00:41:57,342 --> 00:41:58,666
the pamphlets on the way.
615
00:41:58,968 --> 00:42:02,377
Demonstration? You'll get
us all thrown in jail!
616
00:42:02,596 --> 00:42:05,076
It's no big deal, just
a little screaming.
617
00:42:05,597 --> 00:42:08,588
We can't sit around while
the country goes to shit.
618
00:42:08,974 --> 00:42:11,007
Since when are you
into politics?
619
00:42:11,267 --> 00:42:13,258
-Since always.
-Yeah?
620
00:42:13,811 --> 00:42:15,927
Who's the Minister
of the interior?
621
00:42:16,187 --> 00:42:18,178
The interior?
Well...
622
00:42:18,898 --> 00:42:21,973
I'm above your little game.
Who the hell cares?
623
00:42:22,192 --> 00:42:23,432
They're all fascists.
624
00:42:23,693 --> 00:42:25,058
Would you please shut up?
625
00:42:26,403 --> 00:42:29,478
-Tomorrow morning we rehearse.
-Okay.
626
00:42:29,697 --> 00:42:33,606
I'll leave you some
pamphlets, just in case.
627
00:42:33,825 --> 00:42:35,274
See you boys later.
628
00:42:36,076 --> 00:42:39,192
Cover that.
They'll arrest us all.
629
00:42:41,079 --> 00:42:43,820
This street is full of...
secrets.
630
00:42:44,415 --> 00:42:46,812
People have been
nervous lately.
631
00:42:47,041 --> 00:42:49,241
They say General Franco
is sick.
632
00:42:49,460 --> 00:42:51,409
They've been saying
that for years.
633
00:42:52,170 --> 00:42:53,953
I think it's
an actor.
634
00:42:54,338 --> 00:42:58,497
They found some little bald
guy to wave from the balcony.
635
00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:01,041
An actor.
636
00:43:01,677 --> 00:43:04,627
-Do you have a printing press?
-A printing press?
637
00:43:06,430 --> 00:43:09,463
My poor anarchist got
beat up by the police.
638
00:43:09,681 --> 00:43:13,173
A peaceful demonstration.
Burning cars and throwing stones.
639
00:43:13,392 --> 00:43:15,790
I was expecting
a hippie sit-in.
640
00:43:16,019 --> 00:43:17,760
The hunger strike's
next week.
641
00:43:17,979 --> 00:43:20,429
You can count me out.
Let someone else save
642
00:43:21,106 --> 00:43:22,013
Spain.
643
00:43:23,233 --> 00:43:25,714
Are you Jos� Luis Exp�sito,
alias " Bruno"?
644
00:43:25,943 --> 00:43:27,892
-That's my artistic name.
-Whatever.
645
00:43:28,111 --> 00:43:29,935
You, Miss.
Get dressed.
646
00:43:30,488 --> 00:43:33,563
-But what did we do?
-You know exactly what you did.
647
00:43:33,865 --> 00:43:36,190
-You mean the demonstration?
-Don't say anything.
648
00:43:36,867 --> 00:43:39,609
Get her out of here
or I'll kick her ass!
649
00:43:39,828 --> 00:43:41,776
She's just nervous.
650
00:43:42,078 --> 00:43:45,278
Would you please shut up
and put on your pants?
651
00:43:49,333 --> 00:43:50,407
Fuck!
652
00:43:52,044 --> 00:43:55,119
-What the hell is that?
-You know exactly what it is.
653
00:43:55,379 --> 00:43:58,538
-I swear I have no idea.
-It's a printing press.
654
00:43:58,757 --> 00:44:02,332
It's used to make pamphlets.
Like this one!
655
00:44:02,718 --> 00:44:04,167
I don't understand.
656
00:44:04,386 --> 00:44:06,752
-Are you calling me a liar?
-No! God, no.
657
00:44:07,346 --> 00:44:08,878
Ramirez was right about it.
658
00:44:09,097 --> 00:44:11,255
It seems we've found
the organisers.
659
00:44:11,516 --> 00:44:15,966
Organisers? I know nothing
about this. It must have been...
660
00:44:16,185 --> 00:44:16,841
The girl?
661
00:44:17,060 --> 00:44:19,458
Yes. She's up to her
neck in this stuff.
662
00:44:19,770 --> 00:44:22,012
I just wanted her
to like me.
663
00:44:22,231 --> 00:44:24,096
He thinks we're
fucking idiots!
664
00:44:24,357 --> 00:44:25,806
No disrespect
intended, eh?
665
00:44:26,025 --> 00:44:27,641
I'll show you
who to respect.
666
00:44:30,111 --> 00:44:34,051
No. It was her. I swear.
I'm just a comedian.
667
00:44:34,406 --> 00:44:36,188
We don't think
you're funny.
668
00:44:38,659 --> 00:44:40,691
What is this?
Another joke?
669
00:44:40,994 --> 00:44:42,015
I didn't make this.
670
00:44:44,913 --> 00:44:47,987
This is crazy. You can't
kill me for getting laid!
671
00:44:48,498 --> 00:44:50,406
-What day is it?
-Answer, asshole.
672
00:44:50,625 --> 00:44:51,782
You don't know?
673
00:44:54,669 --> 00:44:56,368
April 1st.
674
00:44:56,837 --> 00:45:00,694
April fools! April fools!
675
00:45:01,299 --> 00:45:04,832
How could you fall for these two?
The magician and the fakir!
676
00:45:05,927 --> 00:45:08,168
You took it so
seriously, Jesus!
677
00:45:08,387 --> 00:45:11,754
You're a bunch of pigs.
I almost had a heart attack.
678
00:45:11,973 --> 00:45:12,713
She fell for it.
679
00:45:12,932 --> 00:45:16,257
The truth is, they almost
had me going there.
680
00:45:16,476 --> 00:45:18,216
They exaggerated
at the end.
681
00:45:19,060 --> 00:45:21,218
Like when you blamed
me for everything.
682
00:45:21,437 --> 00:45:24,429
" I didn't do it, it was her."
Great stuff.
683
00:45:25,440 --> 00:45:27,180
You heard all that?
684
00:45:27,441 --> 00:45:30,933
We were outside, trying
not to piss ourselves.
685
00:45:31,903 --> 00:45:35,895
Shit, Laura. I was faking,
just going along with it.
686
00:45:36,114 --> 00:45:37,521
You did a great job.
687
00:45:37,948 --> 00:45:40,815
His face when he saw
the pistol! He bought it.
688
00:45:41,076 --> 00:45:44,359
Yeah, the pistol was a
nice touch. Fucking great.
689
00:45:44,703 --> 00:45:47,101
Come on, let's have
a drink. On Bruno.
690
00:45:47,372 --> 00:45:50,112
Yeah, let's go.
I'm buying.
691
00:45:50,623 --> 00:45:53,156
-Friends?
-Friends.
692
00:45:53,375 --> 00:45:54,866
No grudges, shit.
693
00:45:55,627 --> 00:45:59,619
-Come on, boys! We fooled him!
-You fell for it.
694
00:45:59,838 --> 00:46:01,162
You're a fucking
great guy.
695
00:46:06,301 --> 00:46:07,833
Laura, wait!
696
00:46:08,094 --> 00:46:10,085
I need my things.
I'm leaving.
697
00:46:10,345 --> 00:46:12,628
Why? Because of
that spectacle?
698
00:46:12,847 --> 00:46:15,130
You know what I
feel like doing?
699
00:46:15,349 --> 00:46:16,423
Anything.
700
00:46:17,434 --> 00:46:19,716
Tell Nino he
deserves credit...
701
00:46:19,935 --> 00:46:22,718
for putting up with
a dickhead like you.
702
00:46:32,110 --> 00:46:35,060
All right. I went too far.
I'm sorry.
703
00:46:35,362 --> 00:46:37,228
Don't hold it
against me.
704
00:46:37,447 --> 00:46:38,812
Did I say anything?
705
00:46:40,115 --> 00:46:42,398
I got carried away.
It went too well.
706
00:46:42,617 --> 00:46:45,286
You have to admit
you made it easy.
707
00:46:45,536 --> 00:46:48,611
I fucked up with Laura.
It's not your fault.
708
00:46:49,497 --> 00:46:52,489
I thought she'd get flustered,
not leave you forever.
709
00:46:52,873 --> 00:46:54,572
And I didn't think
you'd mind so much.
710
00:46:55,500 --> 00:46:57,950
Mind? Me?
She's not worth it.
711
00:46:58,210 --> 00:47:00,577
You've been teary-eyed
all week.
712
00:47:01,171 --> 00:47:03,037
You really think I care?
713
00:47:03,256 --> 00:47:06,873
I just act like it
to satisfy you.
714
00:47:07,217 --> 00:47:10,459
Really? Then the truth is,
I don't regret it at all.
715
00:47:10,677 --> 00:47:13,211
I just didn't want
to rub it in.
716
00:47:14,305 --> 00:47:18,673
In fact, I can barely keep from
laughing every time I see you.
717
00:47:18,892 --> 00:47:20,424
I thought so.
718
00:47:23,562 --> 00:47:24,343
Come on.
719
00:47:24,646 --> 00:47:27,470
Do I have to beg?
Do you forgive me or not?
720
00:47:27,772 --> 00:47:29,721
Of course I do,
you retard.
721
00:47:31,191 --> 00:47:32,932
Thanks.
I was worried.
722
00:47:33,276 --> 00:47:35,183
-You screwed me pretty good!
-Friends.
723
00:47:35,402 --> 00:47:38,269
I'm not going to
freak out over a girl.
724
00:47:38,780 --> 00:47:41,104
Is it so obvious
I'm a bastard?
725
00:47:41,698 --> 00:47:43,648
No... well,
actually...
726
00:47:43,867 --> 00:47:46,431
I mean, you knew
I'd betray her?
727
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:49,777
Not really,
though you did.
728
00:47:49,996 --> 00:47:52,279
I had my doubts.
729
00:47:52,498 --> 00:47:53,769
Let's forget it.
730
00:47:54,999 --> 00:47:58,365
Don't feel bad. I'd have
done the same thing.
731
00:47:58,584 --> 00:47:59,991
I'm a coward
like you.
732
00:48:00,210 --> 00:48:01,868
That's enough.
733
00:48:02,253 --> 00:48:04,786
I may have lasted a
little longer, but...
734
00:48:05,005 --> 00:48:05,829
Will you shut
the fuck up?
735
00:48:09,550 --> 00:48:12,219
34 million people.
736
00:48:12,677 --> 00:48:13,459
What?
737
00:48:13,720 --> 00:48:16,201
Tomorrow 34 million people
738
00:48:16,430 --> 00:48:20,464
will laugh their fucking heads
off with Nino and Bruno!
739
00:48:20,683 --> 00:48:21,507
Right?
740
00:48:21,767 --> 00:48:23,216
-Yes! Yes!
-Louder, damn it!
741
00:48:23,518 --> 00:48:25,801
Yes, yes, yes!
742
00:48:26,187 --> 00:48:27,427
Yes!
743
00:48:38,862 --> 00:48:41,426
Live, from Prado
del Rey studios...
744
00:48:41,655 --> 00:48:45,397
Two hours of music,
interviews, and comedy.
745
00:48:45,616 --> 00:48:48,691
And speaking of comedy,
our guests tonight
746
00:48:48,910 --> 00:48:51,944
know very well how
to make you laugh,
747
00:48:52,163 --> 00:48:54,237
even if it hurts.
748
00:48:54,456 --> 00:48:55,821
Good evening,
Nino and Bruno.
749
00:49:03,878 --> 00:49:05,869
Good evening. We're
pleased to be here.
750
00:49:06,463 --> 00:49:07,537
And how did you two
751
00:49:07,756 --> 00:49:09,622
slap your way
to success?
752
00:49:09,841 --> 00:49:12,290
Well, it's important
to have
753
00:49:12,509 --> 00:49:13,500
a sense of humour.
754
00:49:14,552 --> 00:49:15,459
And you, Nino?
755
00:49:15,678 --> 00:49:18,003
How do you handle
all the abuse?
756
00:49:25,060 --> 00:49:26,509
Don't bother.
It's useless.
757
00:49:26,769 --> 00:49:28,343
The lights and cameras
758
00:49:28,604 --> 00:49:30,678
paralyse him.
It's all right.
759
00:49:30,939 --> 00:49:31,804
Is he shy?
760
00:49:32,023 --> 00:49:34,420
No, he's stupid.
But we're like brothers.
761
00:49:35,441 --> 00:49:38,183
And what if I tried
to slap him?
762
00:49:39,110 --> 00:49:40,215
No problem.
763
00:49:40,486 --> 00:49:42,227
Go ahead.
He won't feel it.
764
00:49:42,446 --> 00:49:43,186
Are you sure?
765
00:49:43,405 --> 00:49:44,593
He's like a doll.
766
00:49:44,823 --> 00:49:47,439
Like rubber. The secret
is relaxation.
767
00:49:47,908 --> 00:49:50,149
It's an oriental
technique,
768
00:49:50,368 --> 00:49:52,818
discovered in Nepal.
By not thinking,
769
00:49:53,079 --> 00:49:54,486
and Nino never thinks,
770
00:49:54,746 --> 00:49:58,280
you create an energy field
that repels the slap.
771
00:49:58,582 --> 00:49:59,531
I see.
772
00:49:59,750 --> 00:50:03,367
In slow motion we'd see
that the hand actually
773
00:50:03,586 --> 00:50:05,367
never touches the face.
774
00:50:07,671 --> 00:50:09,954
The human eye can't
distinguish.
775
00:50:10,173 --> 00:50:13,915
The slap is really
just a visual effect.
776
00:50:14,134 --> 00:50:16,417
You mean l, or anyone,
could try it
777
00:50:16,719 --> 00:50:18,668
without special
training?
778
00:50:18,887 --> 00:50:21,087
Yes, of course.
In fact, let's
779
00:50:21,347 --> 00:50:22,921
invite the audience
780
00:50:23,140 --> 00:50:24,631
to give it a shot.
781
00:50:24,933 --> 00:50:26,841
What do you think, Nino?
782
00:50:28,603 --> 00:50:29,676
He'd love to.
783
00:50:29,937 --> 00:50:32,803
All right. If someone
in the audience
784
00:50:33,022 --> 00:50:35,389
would like to
slap Nino...
785
00:50:36,399 --> 00:50:37,587
I see hands...
786
00:50:38,233 --> 00:50:39,338
Here we go.
787
00:50:42,736 --> 00:50:45,353
Are you their manager?
788
00:50:45,572 --> 00:50:46,593
You have a call.
789
00:50:46,906 --> 00:50:48,011
Follow me.
790
00:50:49,866 --> 00:50:51,055
Go ahead, slugger.
791
00:50:53,327 --> 00:50:55,725
That's it.
Good one.
792
00:50:56,246 --> 00:50:58,445
Don't hold back, Ma'am.
793
00:50:59,081 --> 00:51:00,270
No mercy.
794
00:51:02,500 --> 00:51:04,241
-Yes?
-50,000 a night.
795
00:51:04,502 --> 00:51:07,285
-What?
-50,000 a night!
796
00:51:07,504 --> 00:51:10,244
Yeah, well...
we have many offers.
797
00:51:10,463 --> 00:51:11,568
We'll double it.
798
00:51:11,798 --> 00:51:12,496
Another call.
799
00:51:13,007 --> 00:51:14,080
One second.
800
00:51:14,299 --> 00:51:16,415
Fucking great, right?
801
00:51:16,676 --> 00:51:19,668
Hello! With pleasure.
100,000 a week?
802
00:51:19,887 --> 00:51:21,461
I mean starting.
803
00:51:21,680 --> 00:51:25,088
We should talk later.
I'm in a meeting.
804
00:51:25,432 --> 00:51:27,298
Hold on.
I'll call you.
805
00:51:28,393 --> 00:51:30,717
Calm down!
Calm down!
806
00:51:31,770 --> 00:51:32,792
Easy, boys.
807
00:51:33,104 --> 00:51:34,261
Are you crazy?
808
00:51:34,480 --> 00:51:36,513
You vindictive rat!
809
00:51:37,065 --> 00:51:38,014
You were born for this.
810
00:51:38,233 --> 00:51:40,765
Even the cameramen
slapped me!
811
00:51:42,068 --> 00:51:43,517
So? It not my fault.
812
00:51:43,777 --> 00:51:45,602
It's not your fault?
813
00:51:46,279 --> 00:51:48,270
-Get him off of me!
-What's wrong with you?
814
00:51:49,740 --> 00:51:51,272
We should be
celebrating.
815
00:51:51,533 --> 00:51:53,315
We'll even be
on the news.
816
00:51:53,576 --> 00:51:55,067
Yeah, the lead story.
817
00:51:55,828 --> 00:51:56,735
Get him off me!
818
00:51:57,037 --> 00:51:58,819
Get this thing off me!
819
00:52:00,206 --> 00:52:01,571
We're on the air!
820
00:52:04,083 --> 00:52:08,326
Go ahead. Kill each other.
Forget the good news.
821
00:52:10,046 --> 00:52:13,787
The best TV show of
all time just called.
822
00:52:15,549 --> 00:52:16,654
" 1,2,3" called?
823
00:52:17,467 --> 00:52:19,166
Chicho in person.
824
00:52:20,260 --> 00:52:21,751
He wants to see you
825
00:52:22,012 --> 00:52:23,200
tomorrow morning.
826
00:52:25,598 --> 00:52:26,504
And then...
827
00:52:26,765 --> 00:52:28,297
the bomb went off.
828
00:52:29,851 --> 00:52:33,593
We reached the top,
the highest point.
829
00:52:37,147 --> 00:52:39,972
We made TV history.
Champagne commercials,
830
00:52:40,650 --> 00:52:43,850
New Year's Eve specials,
all-star shows...
831
00:52:44,110 --> 00:52:47,393
You name it.
They had it all.
832
00:52:47,779 --> 00:52:51,313
Fame, money, even their
own brand of cupcakes.
833
00:52:56,493 --> 00:52:59,527
They were the
perfect couple.
834
00:52:59,787 --> 00:53:02,487
Always friends,
always smiling.
835
00:53:02,956 --> 00:53:05,072
Nobody was happier.
836
00:53:05,458 --> 00:53:08,158
So clean.
So innocent.
837
00:53:09,648 --> 00:53:12,098
Nobody would
ever suspect
838
00:53:12,317 --> 00:53:15,309
that those cupcakes
had a sour filling.
839
00:53:16,152 --> 00:53:18,685
People say I'm
exaggerating,
840
00:53:19,363 --> 00:53:22,563
but I assure you it
all really happened.
841
00:53:25,825 --> 00:53:29,026
They even bought
identical houses,
842
00:53:29,286 --> 00:53:32,820
connected by a single wall...
to be closer,
843
00:53:33,664 --> 00:53:35,906
to spy on each other
day and night.
844
00:53:53,886 --> 00:53:55,752
Bruno?
Are you there?
845
00:54:34,997 --> 00:54:37,280
Julian, come in.
It just started.
846
00:54:37,582 --> 00:54:40,741
Come in! Close the door!
Quietly!
847
00:54:45,421 --> 00:54:48,038
How long have
you been here?
848
00:54:48,298 --> 00:54:49,247
Three days.
849
00:54:49,466 --> 00:54:50,456
My God. Why?
850
00:54:50,842 --> 00:54:51,665
Look.
851
00:54:52,717 --> 00:54:56,292
You hear that? Three days
without stopping.
852
00:54:56,511 --> 00:54:57,585
Just to fuck with me.
853
00:54:57,804 --> 00:54:59,795
Ask him to turn it off.
854
00:55:00,014 --> 00:55:01,286
Are you crazy?
855
00:55:01,515 --> 00:55:04,840
And see all his little
friends having fun?
856
00:55:05,059 --> 00:55:08,634
No way. He wants to
show me he's more popular.
857
00:55:08,895 --> 00:55:10,803
No, that's not true.
858
00:55:11,522 --> 00:55:13,138
People love you, too.
859
00:55:13,482 --> 00:55:16,015
You're the perfect
couple.
860
00:55:16,317 --> 00:55:17,933
Don't lie to me,
Julian.
861
00:55:18,235 --> 00:55:20,799
I'm not. Laurel and Hardy,
for example.
862
00:55:21,195 --> 00:55:23,727
You think people
like Hardy more?
863
00:55:23,988 --> 00:55:25,062
Of course not.
864
00:55:25,447 --> 00:55:29,221
Abbot and Costello,
Tom and Jerry, Nino and...
865
00:55:29,450 --> 00:55:31,848
...and the asshole who
slaps him around.
866
00:55:32,494 --> 00:55:33,943
Look at this.
867
00:55:34,621 --> 00:55:36,486
A fan letter.
868
00:55:36,872 --> 00:55:39,739
He gets tons and I don't
get shit. Read it.
869
00:55:46,045 --> 00:55:48,370
" You make me laugh and
give life meaning."
870
00:55:48,630 --> 00:55:51,747
"Take me and free my indecency."
She's crazy!
871
00:55:51,966 --> 00:55:55,291
Crazy about him. But
nothing about me at all.
872
00:55:55,676 --> 00:55:58,709
I have one from a twin
who wants to have his kid.
873
00:55:59,387 --> 00:56:01,336
Where did you
get all this?
874
00:56:02,264 --> 00:56:04,047
-The trash.
-Your trash?
875
00:56:04,265 --> 00:56:08,591
Fuck no, his. He throws them
away without even opening them.
876
00:56:08,852 --> 00:56:09,957
You dig in his trash?
877
00:56:10,186 --> 00:56:13,470
Sure. You can find out
a lot about someone.
878
00:56:13,897 --> 00:56:16,680
Trash defines you,
it's who you are.
879
00:56:17,191 --> 00:56:22,059
Now look. It's time for you
to drop the trash thing.
880
00:56:23,237 --> 00:56:25,311
You have to get
out of here.
881
00:56:25,530 --> 00:56:28,271
Get some air. You weren't
like this before.
882
00:56:29,491 --> 00:56:31,971
You were happy.
An extrovert.
883
00:56:32,242 --> 00:56:34,150
You liked women,
and going out.
884
00:56:34,411 --> 00:56:36,975
Yeah, I should have
got married.
885
00:56:38,539 --> 00:56:39,529
He'd hate that.
886
00:56:40,081 --> 00:56:41,030
And children.
887
00:56:41,457 --> 00:56:44,866
Little Brunos running
around his garden.
888
00:56:45,085 --> 00:56:46,450
He'd go fucking nuts.
889
00:56:48,337 --> 00:56:49,077
Don't answer!
890
00:56:49,838 --> 00:56:50,578
Why not?
891
00:56:51,381 --> 00:56:52,204
It's him.
892
00:56:56,426 --> 00:56:57,333
They hung up.
893
00:56:57,594 --> 00:57:00,834
It's him. He calls
to see if I'm home.
894
00:57:01,387 --> 00:57:04,379
Now he knows I hear his
music and his fucking.
895
00:57:04,931 --> 00:57:06,672
You're really sick.
896
00:57:07,933 --> 00:57:09,757
I have to watch
him closely.
897
00:57:10,227 --> 00:57:12,624
I know he's planning
something.
898
00:57:13,479 --> 00:57:16,971
-I'm going to talk to him.
-Good idea.
899
00:57:17,190 --> 00:57:20,880
See what he's up to before
the new show starts.
900
00:57:21,151 --> 00:57:23,350
-He trusts you.
-Fine.
901
00:57:24,528 --> 00:57:25,352
What's wrong?
902
00:57:25,571 --> 00:57:28,135
The question is,
can I trust you?
903
00:57:28,614 --> 00:57:29,980
What are you saying?
904
00:57:30,241 --> 00:57:32,272
Maybe he told you
to spy on me.
905
00:57:32,491 --> 00:57:36,348
I came because I'm worried
about both of you.
906
00:57:36,577 --> 00:57:39,778
-Stay out of that closet.
-I promise.
907
00:57:39,996 --> 00:57:43,655
-I'll turn down the music.
-Don't tell him it bothers me.
908
00:57:43,916 --> 00:57:46,115
Relax. I won't
let on at all.
909
00:58:10,809 --> 00:58:11,549
Hi, Mrs. Julia.
910
00:58:12,560 --> 00:58:14,301
How's the new house?
911
00:58:14,770 --> 00:58:16,136
You miss the village?
912
00:58:31,782 --> 00:58:32,522
Excuse me.
913
00:58:32,741 --> 00:58:33,898
Have you seen Nino?
914
00:58:34,200 --> 00:58:36,868
I don't know.
He's up in his room.
915
00:58:45,165 --> 00:58:46,187
Nino!
916
00:58:53,213 --> 00:58:53,953
Nino?
917
00:59:12,142 --> 00:59:12,924
Nino!
918
00:59:26,694 --> 00:59:28,143
It's you.
919
00:59:32,614 --> 00:59:34,355
Nino, you have to stop.
920
00:59:35,241 --> 00:59:36,263
Stop what?
921
00:59:36,492 --> 00:59:38,650
Don't make this
difficult.
922
00:59:38,994 --> 00:59:40,442
He'll go crazy.
923
00:59:41,245 --> 00:59:42,944
Crazy?
Who?
924
00:59:44,539 --> 00:59:45,237
Bruno.
925
00:59:45,581 --> 00:59:48,531
Oh, the neighbour.
Haven't seen him.
926
00:59:48,917 --> 00:59:50,157
He must be
out of town.
927
00:59:50,376 --> 00:59:52,367
You know exactly
where he is.
928
00:59:53,295 --> 00:59:57,152
Watch that slimy paternal
tone with me, eh?
929
00:59:57,423 --> 00:59:58,746
You live off my
10 per cent.
930
00:59:59,341 --> 01:00:01,822
-Yours and Bruno's!
-We'll see about that.
931
01:00:03,177 --> 01:00:06,950
What have I done? I'm in
my own home. Can't l
932
01:00:07,179 --> 01:00:08,628
have fun in
my own home?
933
01:00:11,016 --> 01:00:13,495
Excuse me,
can we go home?
934
01:00:13,725 --> 01:00:15,924
Carmen's been dancing
5 hours and collapsed.
935
01:00:17,269 --> 01:00:21,209
No way! Keep dancing!
When your shift's over!
936
01:00:21,522 --> 01:00:22,794
All right.
Sorry.
937
01:00:23,148 --> 01:00:26,223
And tell Lola to go
jump in the damn pool.
938
01:00:26,484 --> 01:00:27,589
It's freezing, Nino.
939
01:00:28,694 --> 01:00:31,935
Why the fuck am I paying you?
Get naked in the pool!
940
01:00:33,197 --> 01:00:34,354
And more laughing!
941
01:00:34,573 --> 01:00:37,856
This sounds like
a fucking funeral!
942
01:00:41,661 --> 01:00:43,026
What were we
talking about?
943
01:00:43,245 --> 01:00:44,068
Having fun.
944
01:00:44,329 --> 01:00:47,612
Right. This may look strange,
but it's necessary.
945
01:00:48,248 --> 01:00:49,405
I must defend myself.
946
01:00:50,333 --> 01:00:53,658
Still upset about the slaps?
It's been 10 years.
947
01:00:54,044 --> 01:00:57,817
That's in the past.
This is worse. It's demonic.
948
01:00:59,464 --> 01:01:03,373
Bruno's trying to ruin me
psychologically.
949
01:01:03,926 --> 01:01:05,166
What do you mean?
950
01:01:05,385 --> 01:01:08,794
Forget it. I don't know
why I'm telling you.
951
01:01:09,847 --> 01:01:11,337
You wouldn't understand.
952
01:01:14,183 --> 01:01:16,548
Nino and Bruno cupcakes.
953
01:01:19,978 --> 01:01:20,843
You want half?
954
01:01:22,146 --> 01:01:23,418
I only eat half.
955
01:01:24,356 --> 01:01:25,596
The rest makes
me sick.
956
01:01:28,442 --> 01:01:30,016
Are you going
to tell me?
957
01:01:30,402 --> 01:01:32,685
It's his damn
indifference.
958
01:01:33,029 --> 01:01:35,228
You're right.
I don't understand.
959
01:01:35,697 --> 01:01:37,605
It's very subtle.
960
01:01:38,116 --> 01:01:40,315
He won't look at me
when he slaps me.
961
01:01:40,576 --> 01:01:42,400
I'm like an object.
962
01:01:43,619 --> 01:01:45,944
Nino, that's not true.
963
01:01:47,163 --> 01:01:48,184
You're wrong.
964
01:01:48,413 --> 01:01:50,780
Bruno thinks only
of himself.
965
01:01:51,165 --> 01:01:54,657
I brought my mother here
to be with me. And him?
966
01:01:55,210 --> 01:01:56,534
He's an orphan.
967
01:01:57,086 --> 01:02:00,328
That's no excuse.
At least I'm trying.
968
01:02:00,589 --> 01:02:01,996
I invite him
to my parties.
969
01:02:02,215 --> 01:02:04,831
And all I get from
him is rejection.
970
01:02:40,949 --> 01:02:45,109
Nino, listen to me. This isn't
a party. This is absurd.
971
01:02:45,328 --> 01:02:47,277
It only looks
like a party.
972
01:02:47,496 --> 01:02:49,237
He doesn't know that.
973
01:02:49,581 --> 01:02:53,520
If he only came. Or called.
I call him everyday.
974
01:02:53,833 --> 01:02:55,823
You hang up without
speaking.
975
01:02:56,042 --> 01:02:59,076
He could at least
answer me.
976
01:02:59,295 --> 01:03:00,566
He should apologise.
977
01:03:10,636 --> 01:03:14,837
My head hurts. I'm going
to turn off the music.
978
01:03:15,097 --> 01:03:18,840
No way! You think I like
this crap? Fuck him.
979
01:03:20,393 --> 01:03:21,133
Hey.
980
01:03:21,519 --> 01:03:25,510
You're defending him.
I note a bit of favouritism.
981
01:03:25,812 --> 01:03:27,928
-Are you crazy?
-No, no, no.
982
01:03:28,147 --> 01:03:30,514
You've come
to spy on me.
983
01:03:30,774 --> 01:03:32,098
You're with him.
984
01:03:33,067 --> 01:03:35,892
Get out of my
house, Juli�n!
985
01:03:58,876 --> 01:04:00,200
Smack it!
986
01:04:02,212 --> 01:04:04,036
No, no. Look.
987
01:04:04,630 --> 01:04:07,664
It's not your girlfriend.
988
01:04:07,883 --> 01:04:10,624
It has to be funny.
With humour.
989
01:04:14,304 --> 01:04:15,211
Now.
990
01:04:16,764 --> 01:04:18,797
You can go.
Go home.
991
01:04:21,309 --> 01:04:24,217
You've never done
this before.
992
01:04:24,728 --> 01:04:26,000
It has to be
funny.
993
01:04:29,480 --> 01:04:31,596
You can go, Pepe.
Thanks.
994
01:04:35,109 --> 01:04:37,673
I'd better go. Relax.
I won't say anything.
995
01:04:37,903 --> 01:04:40,936
You guys have to work
this out yourselves.
996
01:04:41,155 --> 01:04:44,147
Easy, Julian. You'll
have a heart attack.
997
01:04:45,742 --> 01:04:49,317
We're loaded.
Thanks to me.
998
01:04:51,537 --> 01:04:53,904
Juli�n... Juli�n...
Juli�n.
999
01:04:54,331 --> 01:04:57,000
Please, Juli�n.
Come on.
1000
01:04:57,500 --> 01:05:00,324
When Bruno gets over
his jealousy
1001
01:05:00,543 --> 01:05:03,024
everything will be
like before.
1002
01:05:03,253 --> 01:05:05,786
-Don't touch me.
-Come back soon.
1003
01:05:06,881 --> 01:05:08,955
And thanks for
the gifts!
1004
01:05:09,466 --> 01:05:13,125
-I didn't give you anything.
-That's all right.
1005
01:06:00,334 --> 01:06:02,532
My letters!
1006
01:06:36,524 --> 01:06:38,015
Die, you fucking pig!
1007
01:07:29,519 --> 01:07:30,384
Mommy!
1008
01:07:47,864 --> 01:07:49,021
Mother!
1009
01:08:07,044 --> 01:08:09,369
I can't believe it, Nino.
1010
01:08:11,004 --> 01:08:13,787
-I'm so sorry.
-Thanks, Chicho.
1011
01:08:14,757 --> 01:08:16,122
-Nino.
-Beatriz.
1012
01:08:16,425 --> 01:08:17,582
Anything you need.
1013
01:08:18,176 --> 01:08:19,125
Thanks.
1014
01:08:19,760 --> 01:08:20,626
I'm very sorry.
1015
01:08:20,844 --> 01:08:24,837
-I'm here for you.
-Thanks, Moncho.
1016
01:08:25,890 --> 01:08:27,922
That's life, son.
I'm sorry.
1017
01:08:28,350 --> 01:08:31,758
You don't know how sorry
I am. I understand.
1018
01:08:32,686 --> 01:08:35,052
I know.
Thanks, Josema.
1019
01:08:36,189 --> 01:08:38,096
-Thanks, Victor.
-I'm sorry, Nino.
1020
01:08:38,565 --> 01:08:39,722
Nino.
1021
01:08:41,651 --> 01:08:43,266
A mother's a mother.
1022
01:08:44,152 --> 01:08:46,101
Don't cry, Bigote.
Thanks.
1023
01:08:49,864 --> 01:08:51,271
It doesn't make sense.
1024
01:08:51,949 --> 01:08:53,439
Neither do you,
Codesito.
1025
01:08:55,326 --> 01:08:56,858
Thank you.
1026
01:08:59,371 --> 01:09:01,070
Thanks, Don Lurio.
1027
01:09:04,082 --> 01:09:06,240
Poor thing.
I couldn't even hear
1028
01:09:06,459 --> 01:09:08,241
her last words.
1029
01:09:08,502 --> 01:09:09,951
She never spoke
to you.
1030
01:09:10,503 --> 01:09:13,453
We'd broken the ice.
The other day she said...
1031
01:09:13,672 --> 01:09:15,829
"Go wash up."
1032
01:09:16,090 --> 01:09:17,997
That's a step forward.
1033
01:09:18,591 --> 01:09:19,696
I cried.
1034
01:09:19,967 --> 01:09:22,532
I talked to
the TV people.
1035
01:09:22,803 --> 01:09:26,170
I'm returning the money they
advanced us for the show.
1036
01:09:26,764 --> 01:09:28,671
Sorry, I wasn't listening.
1037
01:09:28,890 --> 01:09:31,340
I was saying the
TV people want
1038
01:09:31,559 --> 01:09:33,800
to cancel the
new contract.
1039
01:09:34,019 --> 01:09:35,124
What?
Are you crazy?
1040
01:09:35,478 --> 01:09:36,427
Why?
1041
01:09:36,646 --> 01:09:38,053
Things aren't exactly...
1042
01:09:38,355 --> 01:09:40,920
Things are fine.
We record on the 23rd.
1043
01:09:41,733 --> 01:09:44,516
But Nino, you just testified
to the Grand Jury
1044
01:09:44,735 --> 01:09:47,976
that Bruno killed
your mother.
1045
01:09:48,195 --> 01:09:50,676
I'm a professional.
He can kill my mother,
1046
01:09:50,905 --> 01:09:52,437
but he can't
make me quit!
1047
01:09:52,656 --> 01:09:54,022
What if he quits?
1048
01:09:54,282 --> 01:09:58,024
Then we nail his ass for
breach of contract.
1049
01:09:58,368 --> 01:10:00,276
I can't prove he
killed my mother.
1050
01:10:00,745 --> 01:10:02,861
But I can still
force him to come
1051
01:10:03,122 --> 01:10:05,988
and slap me around
whenever I want.
1052
01:10:24,052 --> 01:10:27,669
Fuck no! I need a rehearsal
to position the cameras.
1053
01:10:28,055 --> 01:10:29,838
What's your problem?
1054
01:10:30,056 --> 01:10:32,423
Do you ask the players
to rehearse before
1055
01:10:32,683 --> 01:10:34,257
a soccer game?
1056
01:10:34,476 --> 01:10:37,885
Cut the shit. Put your
cameras wherever you want.
1057
01:10:39,021 --> 01:10:39,970
They're here!
1058
01:10:44,650 --> 01:10:47,600
Mr. Bruno's on the set!
Lights!
1059
01:10:47,861 --> 01:10:49,851
Hi, Paquito.
How's your wife?
1060
01:10:50,070 --> 01:10:53,895
-Cheating on me, as usual.
-Give her a kiss for me.
1061
01:10:54,448 --> 01:10:55,980
Where's Nino?
1062
01:10:56,908 --> 01:10:58,982
When Nino's ready
we'll begin.
1063
01:10:59,326 --> 01:11:01,234
Mr. Nino's on the set!
1064
01:11:14,754 --> 01:11:17,453
Hi, Nino. We're not
rehearsing today,
1065
01:11:17,672 --> 01:11:19,830
so everyone get
ready to roll.
1066
01:11:20,883 --> 01:11:23,123
I just wanted
to say...
1067
01:11:23,384 --> 01:11:25,667
I'm sorry about your mom.
It was an accident.
1068
01:11:25,885 --> 01:11:27,251
Control!
You hear me?
1069
01:11:27,512 --> 01:11:28,617
We hear you, Nino.
1070
01:11:28,888 --> 01:11:32,421
Could someone tell this
individual not to address me?
1071
01:11:32,640 --> 01:11:34,965
He can only use
the script.
1072
01:11:35,225 --> 01:11:37,008
It's in the fucking
contract!
1073
01:11:37,227 --> 01:11:39,968
I know, I'm sorry.
1074
01:11:40,521 --> 01:11:41,928
It won't happen again.
1075
01:11:42,439 --> 01:11:45,003
All right, let's go.
Five and action.
1076
01:12:04,787 --> 01:12:05,610
Who's that?
1077
01:12:08,790 --> 01:12:09,978
Put it on this screen.
1078
01:12:12,209 --> 01:12:13,950
Everybody freeze!
1079
01:12:14,377 --> 01:12:15,159
What was that?
1080
01:12:15,378 --> 01:12:17,452
" Hi everybody",
I think.
1081
01:12:21,257 --> 01:12:22,164
Action.
1082
01:12:23,717 --> 01:12:25,665
Nice, seal.
Good seal.
1083
01:12:26,676 --> 01:12:28,125
Come in!
1084
01:12:28,844 --> 01:12:30,168
Sit down.
1085
01:12:31,596 --> 01:12:34,046
You're here for
the rabbit job.
1086
01:12:34,390 --> 01:12:37,715
What are your references?
I know...
1087
01:12:37,934 --> 01:12:40,415
You're a little rich
family bunny, right?
1088
01:12:40,686 --> 01:12:43,428
A cute pet that plays
with the kids.
1089
01:12:43,813 --> 01:12:45,721
This is a tough job,
you know?
1090
01:12:46,357 --> 01:12:48,838
We're dealing
with hats here.
1091
01:12:49,734 --> 01:12:50,558
Well?
1092
01:12:50,818 --> 01:12:53,487
-I'll fucking kill you.
-Shit!
1093
01:12:53,945 --> 01:12:57,687
The bunny speaks!
It's the talking bunny!
1094
01:12:58,281 --> 01:13:00,272
-What a surprise!
-You piece of shit!
1095
01:13:01,658 --> 01:13:03,024
What are you doing?
1096
01:13:03,368 --> 01:13:04,775
This isn't right.
1097
01:13:05,286 --> 01:13:06,234
Paquito!
1098
01:13:07,245 --> 01:13:09,362
From now on things
will change.
1099
01:13:09,580 --> 01:13:10,154
Paquito!
1100
01:13:14,834 --> 01:13:17,034
Remember Visir?
1101
01:13:19,379 --> 01:13:21,120
You don't like
animals, do you?
1102
01:13:21,547 --> 01:13:24,216
This isn't in the script.
What now?
1103
01:13:35,431 --> 01:13:37,881
Everyone on the floor!
1104
01:13:43,353 --> 01:13:44,802
What is this?
A movie?
1105
01:13:45,104 --> 01:13:47,929
No, it's the Congress.
It's live!
1106
01:13:48,190 --> 01:13:49,556
Just what we needed!
1107
01:13:53,819 --> 01:13:57,509
If it weren't impossible,
I'd say this is a coup d'�tat.
1108
01:14:08,328 --> 01:14:09,861
Look what you did
to the fish!
1109
01:14:10,246 --> 01:14:11,820
You don't like
animals?
1110
01:14:16,918 --> 01:14:19,315
Get me the
news channel.
1111
01:14:20,587 --> 01:14:24,527
Mari Carmen, is this
Congress thing for real?
1112
01:14:29,468 --> 01:14:31,417
But this doesn't
make sense.
1113
01:14:31,636 --> 01:14:34,919
This is against history.
We can't go backwards.
1114
01:14:35,138 --> 01:14:37,879
Sorry, sir. I don't
understand politics.
1115
01:14:38,265 --> 01:14:40,006
They caught us
by surprise.
1116
01:14:40,225 --> 01:14:43,341
We were just doing military
service, and suddenly...
1117
01:14:43,560 --> 01:14:47,417
Shut up, Guti�rrez.
It's nobody's business.
1118
01:14:47,897 --> 01:14:51,055
We stop all recordings
and wait for orders.
1119
01:14:51,274 --> 01:14:54,391
That's our mission.
Where's the plug?
1120
01:14:55,485 --> 01:14:57,685
It was an accident!
1121
01:14:57,904 --> 01:14:59,686
-Follow them!
-Go, go, go.
1122
01:14:59,947 --> 01:15:03,522
And what if they called
and said kill everyone?
1123
01:15:03,741 --> 01:15:05,189
Don't give them
any ideas.
1124
01:15:05,408 --> 01:15:09,182
Shut up, sir. Nobody said
anything about killing.
1125
01:15:09,411 --> 01:15:13,268
You gentlemen relax and
there won't be any trouble.
1126
01:15:14,790 --> 01:15:15,978
Hey, look!
1127
01:15:18,334 --> 01:15:19,699
It's Nino and Bruno!
1128
01:15:20,252 --> 01:15:21,659
We'll stop them.
1129
01:15:21,878 --> 01:15:24,077
No, let them continue.
I love them.
1130
01:15:24,338 --> 01:15:27,038
But Nino's the one
whipping the other.
1131
01:15:27,257 --> 01:15:30,332
-Do we keep recording?
-One and three are cut.
1132
01:15:31,301 --> 01:15:32,250
Hilarious!
Leave it.
1133
01:15:32,636 --> 01:15:36,086
It's about time he kicked
that guy's ass.
1134
01:15:38,555 --> 01:15:41,120
Pardon me, have
you got any beer?
1135
01:15:41,641 --> 01:15:43,632
There's a vending machine
in the hall.
1136
01:15:43,892 --> 01:15:47,176
All right, give us your money.
1137
01:15:47,437 --> 01:15:48,427
Loose change.
1138
01:15:49,063 --> 01:15:50,053
Come on.
1139
01:15:54,483 --> 01:15:58,642
I've been driving around
in that tank all day long.
1140
01:15:59,862 --> 01:16:01,603
My God.
1141
01:16:04,157 --> 01:16:08,097
Life's like a lottery.
Sometimes you win...
1142
01:16:08,410 --> 01:16:09,597
and sometimes you lose.
1143
01:16:09,951 --> 01:16:13,152
The coup d'�tat
went nowhere, while
1144
01:16:13,454 --> 01:16:15,487
Nino and Bruno's new
act became a hit.
1145
01:16:16,206 --> 01:16:19,698
Somehow we even won
international awards.
1146
01:16:20,584 --> 01:16:22,366
It was time
to quit.
1147
01:16:22,961 --> 01:16:26,818
For ten years, their shows
were seen on TV programs
1148
01:16:27,422 --> 01:16:29,121
all over the world.
1149
01:16:29,340 --> 01:16:31,581
The Spanish team
and their leader,
1150
01:16:31,842 --> 01:16:34,625
his Highness the
Prince of Spain.
1151
01:16:34,844 --> 01:16:37,877
Next to him is Nino,
who we all miss.
1152
01:16:38,096 --> 01:16:41,170
-What's his event, Matias?
-Almost all of them.
1153
01:16:41,389 --> 01:16:43,422
The emotion is
overwhelming.
1154
01:16:43,724 --> 01:16:45,090
The torch arrives,
1155
01:16:45,350 --> 01:16:46,924
held by this man,
1156
01:16:47,227 --> 01:16:49,009
Eric, who will
pass it on.
1157
01:16:49,895 --> 01:16:52,512
There he is, Nino.
A bastion,
1158
01:16:52,731 --> 01:16:56,056
the representative of
our country's humanity
1159
01:16:56,275 --> 01:16:57,974
beyond our borders.
1160
01:16:58,193 --> 01:17:00,726
-Silence in the stadium.
-Can he do it?
1161
01:17:00,945 --> 01:17:02,310
There's the arrow.
1162
01:17:04,697 --> 01:17:09,399
He did it! Nino has inaugurated
the 1992 Olympic Games.
1163
01:17:22,501 --> 01:17:24,898
He's here! Here he comes.
1164
01:17:25,127 --> 01:17:28,984
They didn't see each
other for ten years.
1165
01:17:30,465 --> 01:17:33,498
It seemed all the hate
had finally faded.
1166
01:17:33,759 --> 01:17:35,791
But, as usual,
I was wrong.
1167
01:17:41,472 --> 01:17:42,713
Hey, Nino!
Over here!
1168
01:17:56,273 --> 01:17:58,181
I ordered oysters
and some ham
1169
01:17:58,400 --> 01:17:59,557
for a snack.
1170
01:18:00,610 --> 01:18:01,631
And the extra plate?
1171
01:18:02,653 --> 01:18:04,602
Oh... I'm expecting
1172
01:18:04,863 --> 01:18:06,770
someone. Please.
Sit down.
1173
01:18:07,198 --> 01:18:09,314
It's more money than
you can imagine.
1174
01:18:09,533 --> 01:18:11,232
I can imagine a lot.
1175
01:18:11,451 --> 01:18:12,274
Let me explain.
1176
01:18:14,161 --> 01:18:15,068
It's him, right?
1177
01:18:16,037 --> 01:18:18,403
Yes. But don't worry.
1178
01:18:18,663 --> 01:18:21,280
He knows nothing.
I had to explain
1179
01:18:21,498 --> 01:18:23,573
-to get him to come.
-What's this about?
1180
01:18:36,467 --> 01:18:38,865
What's this?
A telephone number?
1181
01:18:39,136 --> 01:18:40,585
It's your fee
if you come back.
1182
01:18:40,845 --> 01:18:42,670
-Annually?
-Per show.
1183
01:18:42,972 --> 01:18:43,795
For both of us.
1184
01:18:44,014 --> 01:18:46,798
Each. And I've already
taken my cut.
1185
01:18:48,933 --> 01:18:51,414
Just like Bruno.
Late as usual.
1186
01:18:51,727 --> 01:18:52,717
Julian!
1187
01:18:55,688 --> 01:18:56,637
There he is.
1188
01:18:58,857 --> 01:19:00,640
He looks like shit.
1189
01:19:01,317 --> 01:19:03,600
He had problems
with the leg.
1190
01:19:04,111 --> 01:19:05,018
What leg?
1191
01:19:05,237 --> 01:19:06,602
You sliced his
ankle, remember?
1192
01:19:06,904 --> 01:19:08,854
-Me?
-You put it in the magic box
1193
01:19:09,114 --> 01:19:11,564
and, well... but that's
all history now.
1194
01:19:11,783 --> 01:19:14,608
What matters is the 1992
New Year's Eve Special.
1195
01:19:14,827 --> 01:19:17,735
Hey, one moment!
Where are you going?
1196
01:19:20,663 --> 01:19:24,197
Sorry I'm late, Juli�n.
It was the bus.
1197
01:19:24,457 --> 01:19:26,323
There was a lot
of traffic.
1198
01:19:26,542 --> 01:19:28,867
Relax, we just
got here.
1199
01:19:29,127 --> 01:19:30,201
Eat something.
1200
01:19:31,462 --> 01:19:34,371
We were talking about
the contract.
1201
01:19:34,590 --> 01:19:36,747
Wait one minute. I'm
going to the bathroom.
1202
01:19:38,759 --> 01:19:41,324
He just got here
and he has to pee?
1203
01:19:41,636 --> 01:19:44,305
He's sick. You know,
because of the...
1204
01:19:44,555 --> 01:19:45,212
Dope?
1205
01:19:45,973 --> 01:19:46,838
All kinds.
1206
01:19:47,140 --> 01:19:48,464
Fucking drugs!
1207
01:19:49,100 --> 01:19:50,424
That stuff can kill!
1208
01:19:50,684 --> 01:19:53,550
He has no money left.
He's spent it all.
1209
01:19:54,186 --> 01:19:55,885
He must have
snorted a ton!
1210
01:19:56,104 --> 01:19:58,845
That's why I think the
show's a good idea.
1211
01:19:59,148 --> 01:20:02,139
He could get back on
his feet. Both of you.
1212
01:20:02,400 --> 01:20:05,850
What are you saying?
Right now I'm " number one".
1213
01:20:06,194 --> 01:20:09,968
I'm " into the top". I'm the
master. Don't you watch TV?
1214
01:20:10,197 --> 01:20:13,481
But you paid a lot to
be in the Olympics.
1215
01:20:13,699 --> 01:20:16,941
Nobody knows that.
Everything's going my way.
1216
01:20:17,202 --> 01:20:18,526
I'm the Spanish
" Frank" Sinatra.
1217
01:20:18,786 --> 01:20:20,819
Easy, Frank.
1218
01:20:21,038 --> 01:20:23,029
So what do we do?
1219
01:20:24,374 --> 01:20:28,031
Well, if it's for him...
what can I say?
1220
01:20:29,751 --> 01:20:31,409
-No.
-What?
1221
01:20:31,795 --> 01:20:34,192
Never. Not for all
the gold in the world.
1222
01:20:36,506 --> 01:20:38,987
Have you two eaten
everything?
1223
01:20:39,508 --> 01:20:42,375
No, no. We were
waiting for you.
1224
01:20:42,636 --> 01:20:44,877
So, what I told you
about the show...
1225
01:20:45,763 --> 01:20:47,587
First, tell Nino
something for me.
1226
01:20:48,264 --> 01:20:52,757
Tell this person that I'm not
interested in what he has to say.
1227
01:20:57,353 --> 01:20:59,553
Nino has always
been our nucleus.
1228
01:20:59,813 --> 01:21:02,054
He's by far the funnier
of the two.
1229
01:21:02,565 --> 01:21:04,598
We shouldn't be
paid the same.
1230
01:21:06,109 --> 01:21:07,350
I was thinking,
1231
01:21:07,569 --> 01:21:11,770
30 per cent for me and 70 for
him would be more appropriate.
1232
01:21:14,157 --> 01:21:16,189
But if it wasn't
meant to be...
1233
01:21:16,617 --> 01:21:19,442
I'd like you to
give this to him.
1234
01:21:21,412 --> 01:21:24,195
I won't bother you anymore.
I'm leaving.
1235
01:21:24,789 --> 01:21:25,654
Good-bye.
1236
01:21:38,131 --> 01:21:39,038
Bruno!
1237
01:21:39,298 --> 01:21:41,831
You're mine,
motherfucker!
1238
01:21:42,467 --> 01:21:43,708
Did you call me?
1239
01:21:43,927 --> 01:21:46,752
Bruno. There's still
some ham left.
1240
01:21:47,137 --> 01:21:48,795
We need to talk
about the show.
1241
01:21:58,812 --> 01:22:01,636
Nino! Excuse me.
You're Nino, right?
1242
01:22:02,272 --> 01:22:03,429
Eh... yes.
1243
01:22:03,648 --> 01:22:04,888
Can I have your
autograph?
1244
01:22:05,608 --> 01:22:08,172
-Do you have any paper?
-On my t-shirt.
1245
01:22:08,443 --> 01:22:11,310
Autographs are such a pain.
Nowhere to hide.
1246
01:22:11,528 --> 01:22:13,019
That used to
happen to me.
1247
01:22:13,280 --> 01:22:14,145
Juli�n!
1248
01:22:16,490 --> 01:22:17,679
What cuties!
1249
01:22:19,117 --> 01:22:20,691
-You too, honey?
-Yes.
1250
01:22:22,703 --> 01:22:25,945
Don't get nervous, now.
There.
1251
01:22:26,622 --> 01:22:29,823
Give me a call at
the office sometime.
1252
01:22:30,125 --> 01:22:31,032
Good-bye.
1253
01:22:34,627 --> 01:22:36,743
You're so lucky!
1254
01:22:36,962 --> 01:22:39,912
You sit in the background
and nobody bothers you.
1255
01:22:40,173 --> 01:22:41,330
It's great.
1256
01:22:41,549 --> 01:22:44,082
Come on, Robocop.
Let's go.
1257
01:22:57,310 --> 01:22:58,415
Is this your bag?
1258
01:22:58,936 --> 01:23:00,010
No, that's mine.
1259
01:23:00,729 --> 01:23:01,750
And whose is this?
1260
01:23:01,980 --> 01:23:02,887
Mine. What's wrong?
1261
01:23:03,147 --> 01:23:04,096
Open it please.
1262
01:23:04,355 --> 01:23:06,722
We're in a hurry.
1263
01:23:06,940 --> 01:23:08,806
Come on, Nino.
It's all right.
1264
01:23:09,526 --> 01:23:13,216
This won't take but
a second. Let's see...
1265
01:23:14,779 --> 01:23:16,854
Here we are.
Well, well.
1266
01:23:17,490 --> 01:23:18,855
Is this a joke?
1267
01:23:20,242 --> 01:23:21,148
Wow, man.
1268
01:23:21,993 --> 01:23:25,110
You TV guys are always
up to something.
1269
01:23:25,870 --> 01:23:29,279
Very nice, yes sir.
And what do we have here?
1270
01:23:30,499 --> 01:23:33,490
Let's have a look.
Just as I imagined.
1271
01:23:33,960 --> 01:23:36,325
I swear I have nothing
to do with this.
1272
01:23:36,544 --> 01:23:40,369
No doubt. I'll taste to be
sure, but I think this is...
1273
01:23:43,632 --> 01:23:45,873
Nose candy.
Yes sir.
1274
01:23:46,717 --> 01:23:48,542
You have to come
with us.
1275
01:23:48,761 --> 01:23:50,710
It won't be long.
Don't worry.
1276
01:23:50,929 --> 01:23:51,794
Guards, please.
1277
01:23:52,597 --> 01:23:56,339
Juli�n, do something.
Hey, do you know who I am?
1278
01:23:56,599 --> 01:23:59,841
-Juli�n, do something! Shit!
-What can I do?
1279
01:24:00,894 --> 01:24:03,802
Our friend the TV star
had quite a stash.
1280
01:24:04,355 --> 01:24:05,846
Come on.
Come here.
1281
01:24:08,940 --> 01:24:11,724
-Look me in the eye.
-Are you crazy?
1282
01:24:11,943 --> 01:24:13,808
Tell me it wasn't you.
1283
01:24:14,069 --> 01:24:15,727
Why would I do
such a thing?
1284
01:24:15,945 --> 01:24:19,146
It would take years to
find that much stuff.
1285
01:24:19,364 --> 01:24:21,439
-Exactly ten years.
-Listen.
1286
01:24:22,158 --> 01:24:24,639
I'm going to find
a lawyer.
1287
01:24:24,868 --> 01:24:26,526
Juli�n. Listen.
Juli�n!
1288
01:24:36,585 --> 01:24:37,408
Hi!
1289
01:24:39,796 --> 01:24:42,119
You want to sign, too?
It's free.
1290
01:24:42,338 --> 01:24:44,788
Another time, gorgeous.
See you later!
1291
01:24:45,007 --> 01:24:46,872
-Bye, Bruno.
-Bye.
1292
01:24:47,091 --> 01:24:49,958
And take off those shirts,
you'll get arrested!
1293
01:24:52,762 --> 01:24:53,919
I spoke
1294
01:24:54,138 --> 01:24:54,961
with the lawyer.
1295
01:24:55,180 --> 01:24:57,713
So? It was obviously
a set-up, right?
1296
01:24:57,932 --> 01:25:01,966
But you claimed it was for
consumption. A kilo is a lot.
1297
01:25:02,727 --> 01:25:05,636
Get me fucking bail.
Everyone gets bail.
1298
01:25:05,855 --> 01:25:06,720
We're on it.
1299
01:25:06,939 --> 01:25:09,472
But they want to
set an example.
1300
01:25:09,732 --> 01:25:12,640
An example? These
asshole judges should
1301
01:25:12,900 --> 01:25:15,725
go over to Bruno the
Antichrist's house
1302
01:25:16,069 --> 01:25:18,435
and burn it down
with him inside.
1303
01:25:18,779 --> 01:25:20,520
That would be justice.
1304
01:25:21,031 --> 01:25:23,898
Calm down. I'm just
as fucked as you are.
1305
01:25:24,492 --> 01:25:26,608
No, not quite.
1306
01:25:26,910 --> 01:25:30,360
I've got four suitors in
there waiting to propose.
1307
01:25:30,663 --> 01:25:31,987
You know what
I mean?
1308
01:25:32,205 --> 01:25:35,979
Yeah, I understand. I know.
But we need time.
1309
01:25:36,208 --> 01:25:40,034
Look on the bright side.
The press didn't abuse it.
1310
01:25:41,295 --> 01:25:43,536
A special pull-out
in the Sunday paper!
1311
01:25:44,880 --> 01:25:46,152
Nobody reads that.
1312
01:25:46,381 --> 01:25:48,372
Look at the
TV section.
1313
01:25:48,966 --> 01:25:50,749
The New Year's Special,
1314
01:25:50,968 --> 01:25:52,708
but without
my photo.
1315
01:25:53,011 --> 01:25:55,794
And the misprints.
It says " Bruno and Tino".
1316
01:25:56,221 --> 01:25:57,879
"Tino"?
What is that?
1317
01:25:59,015 --> 01:26:00,381
Yeah, "Tino".
1318
01:26:00,641 --> 01:26:01,506
What's wrong?
1319
01:26:02,184 --> 01:26:03,424
With me?
Nothing.
1320
01:26:03,643 --> 01:26:06,093
Juli�n, you're
hiding something.
1321
01:26:06,562 --> 01:26:07,719
It's no misprint.
1322
01:26:08,313 --> 01:26:09,012
What?
1323
01:26:10,857 --> 01:26:13,306
Bruno's doing a casting
to find his "Tino".
1324
01:26:13,525 --> 01:26:16,975
He's called everyone. Even
the Bullfighting Fireman.
1325
01:26:18,611 --> 01:26:20,602
He's replacing me
with a dwarf.
1326
01:26:20,904 --> 01:26:23,896
I tried to stop him,
but it's legal.
1327
01:26:24,115 --> 01:26:26,148
There's no patent
for slapping.
1328
01:26:26,617 --> 01:26:28,733
He even convinced
the TV station.
1329
01:26:28,952 --> 01:26:33,278
I'm in jail and he triumphs
with the Bullfighting Fireman!
1330
01:26:33,538 --> 01:26:37,312
Please, Nino. Don't get
carried away with this.
1331
01:26:38,125 --> 01:26:40,491
I'm fine.
I'm fine...
1332
01:26:40,960 --> 01:26:44,494
It's this light.
Someone turn it off.
1333
01:26:45,380 --> 01:26:47,496
I told him I'm out.
1334
01:26:47,922 --> 01:26:51,998
No way, Juli�n.
You have to stay with him.
1335
01:26:52,217 --> 01:26:53,541
I could never...
1336
01:26:53,885 --> 01:26:57,377
Yes! Don't let that vermin
out of your sight.
1337
01:26:57,596 --> 01:27:01,255
Stick to his shoe
like a piece of gum.
1338
01:27:02,516 --> 01:27:03,340
Stop it!
1339
01:27:03,558 --> 01:27:05,466
-Sorry, Mr. Nino.
-What do you want?
1340
01:27:05,727 --> 01:27:06,967
Your time's up.
1341
01:27:07,228 --> 01:27:10,636
Juli�n, don't let me down.
Watch the Antichrist!
1342
01:27:10,855 --> 01:27:14,889
Let me go, bastards! I'm not
an animal. I'm a human being!
1343
01:27:15,108 --> 01:27:17,141
-Don't touch Nino, you fuckers!
-Assholes!
1344
01:27:31,911 --> 01:27:33,485
What's this for?
1345
01:27:33,704 --> 01:27:35,486
I don't know.
My agent sent me.
1346
01:27:35,705 --> 01:27:37,696
It's for a
substitution.
1347
01:27:37,957 --> 01:27:40,782
That guy's crying. Some
people can't take it.
1348
01:27:41,000 --> 01:27:44,659
Being an artist can
be a tough job.
1349
01:27:46,504 --> 01:27:50,747
Hello. Number 482. My name
is Alfonso. I'm a singer...
1350
01:27:51,174 --> 01:27:52,497
Singer?
1351
01:27:53,008 --> 01:27:54,790
Come on, a singer?
1352
01:27:56,469 --> 01:27:58,210
No way.
1353
01:27:59,513 --> 01:28:02,077
Hello.
I'm number 483.
1354
01:28:02,306 --> 01:28:04,975
My name is Jos� Manuel
and I study drama...
1355
01:28:06,684 --> 01:28:08,550
No. I don't know.
1356
01:28:09,103 --> 01:28:11,427
I'm number 494.
I'm an actor.
1357
01:28:11,646 --> 01:28:14,554
I was in the Kid's Circus,
but now I'm bigger...
1358
01:28:15,899 --> 01:28:17,473
No, no, no.
1359
01:28:18,651 --> 01:28:21,017
481, my name is
Eduardo G�mez.
1360
01:28:21,278 --> 01:28:23,945
I study the
"Stainasky" method.
1361
01:28:24,154 --> 01:28:26,520
Stanislavsky?
I like it.
1362
01:28:27,531 --> 01:28:29,230
No, his face
is pathetic.
1363
01:28:29,825 --> 01:28:33,066
What? Who does the slapping
around here? Me!
1364
01:28:33,577 --> 01:28:36,194
I say who stays
and who goes.
1365
01:28:36,538 --> 01:28:40,155
You see? He's perfect.
His face isn't pathetic.
1366
01:28:40,415 --> 01:28:41,656
Are you pathetic?
1367
01:28:42,000 --> 01:28:45,408
Well, I'm not exactly
happy, but give me time...
1368
01:28:45,794 --> 01:28:49,286
He's made for the job.
He won't annoy people.
1369
01:28:49,505 --> 01:28:50,829
-What's your name?
-Me?
1370
01:28:51,048 --> 01:28:53,664
It doesn't matter.
From now on you're Tino.
1371
01:28:53,925 --> 01:28:55,082
A round of applause.
1372
01:28:55,301 --> 01:28:59,417
You guys look like you're
fucking asleep! Bravo, kid!
1373
01:29:23,486 --> 01:29:24,810
Nino.
1374
01:29:25,071 --> 01:29:26,895
Success is killing you.
1375
01:29:27,363 --> 01:29:30,688
You look good, too. Though
I liked the tux better.
1376
01:29:31,491 --> 01:29:33,107
I've missed you
so much.
1377
01:29:33,326 --> 01:29:35,723
You could have
come to see us.
1378
01:29:36,119 --> 01:29:38,819
I didn't want to see
you, just miss you.
1379
01:29:39,080 --> 01:29:41,863
I've quit magic.
In the last town
1380
01:29:42,082 --> 01:29:44,531
they threw me from the
bell tower tied to a goat.
1381
01:29:44,792 --> 01:29:47,190
So now, you see,
I'm a labourer.
1382
01:29:47,419 --> 01:29:50,953
Taking doves out of a
hat is out of style.
1383
01:29:51,630 --> 01:29:53,121
That's true.
1384
01:29:53,381 --> 01:29:56,540
Now people want
spaceships, aliens...
1385
01:29:56,842 --> 01:30:00,500
and those fucking special
effects will be the end of us!
1386
01:30:00,802 --> 01:30:02,043
And we ate all
our doves.
1387
01:30:02,303 --> 01:30:05,879
Damn ecologists! You're
here for eating doves?
1388
01:30:06,139 --> 01:30:08,255
No. We're not
in jail, Nino.
1389
01:30:08,474 --> 01:30:11,007
We're building
scaffolding
1390
01:30:11,226 --> 01:30:14,176
for the Christmas
concert.
1391
01:30:14,437 --> 01:30:16,428
-Christmas concert?
-What are you doing?
1392
01:30:20,483 --> 01:30:21,473
It sounds good.
1393
01:30:21,942 --> 01:30:26,018
We've got speakers that
could blow up a house.
1394
01:30:26,279 --> 01:30:27,602
500,000 watts.
1395
01:30:28,238 --> 01:30:30,229
"Javi" metal.
It's "Javi" metal.
1396
01:30:30,657 --> 01:30:34,023
Why the fuck do you
need a small saxophone?
1397
01:30:34,575 --> 01:30:36,775
Yeah, I looked
everywhere.
1398
01:30:36,993 --> 01:30:39,193
Look, I got a guitar
and a piano,
1399
01:30:39,453 --> 01:30:41,444
but I couldn't
get the saxophone.
1400
01:30:42,497 --> 01:30:44,822
You want me
to go crazy?
1401
01:30:45,583 --> 01:30:48,574
Who cares if it was
Charlie Rivel's.
1402
01:30:48,960 --> 01:30:51,910
Just worry about one thing.
Tomorrow at seven
1403
01:30:52,129 --> 01:30:53,745
you have to be
in make-up.
1404
01:30:53,964 --> 01:30:57,497
You and that Tino guy,
or whatever his name is.
1405
01:30:58,800 --> 01:31:02,491
You and Tino tomorrow
at seven in make-up.
1406
01:31:02,928 --> 01:31:06,544
I'll get the saxophone.
I swear to God.
1407
01:31:08,515 --> 01:31:10,172
The riot began
at the annual
1408
01:31:10,433 --> 01:31:14,008
Christmas concert at
Carabanchel Prison.
1409
01:31:15,686 --> 01:31:17,677
I've got to hang up.
1410
01:31:17,980 --> 01:31:19,303
There were no
1411
01:31:19,564 --> 01:31:24,140
injuries, but objects were
thrown into nearby streets.
1412
01:31:24,484 --> 01:31:27,184
Nevertheless, police
sources confirm
1413
01:31:27,445 --> 01:31:32,229
at least one inmate managed to
escape hidden inside of a speaker.
1414
01:31:35,825 --> 01:31:37,982
No, man. Shit!
I told you.
1415
01:31:38,201 --> 01:31:40,682
Don't fucking
close your eyes!
1416
01:31:40,953 --> 01:31:43,517
Sorry, Bruno.
I can't help it.
1417
01:31:44,247 --> 01:31:46,155
Come on.
Let's try again.
1418
01:31:48,417 --> 01:31:51,450
No... Don't worry.
It's not your fault.
1419
01:31:51,836 --> 01:31:55,161
It's impossible without
the right gear.
1420
01:31:55,380 --> 01:31:58,163
You're out of character
without the saxophone.
1421
01:31:58,424 --> 01:32:00,290
We'll wait until
tomorrow.
1422
01:32:00,509 --> 01:32:02,708
Relax.
You're very tense.
1423
01:32:02,927 --> 01:32:04,835
Is something
bothering you?
1424
01:32:05,095 --> 01:32:07,252
It's not so
difficult.
1425
01:32:07,638 --> 01:32:10,171
I'm not asking you
to do Hamlet.
1426
01:32:10,431 --> 01:32:12,130
Exactly the opposite.
1427
01:32:12,349 --> 01:32:15,758
Don't do anything.
No expression.
1428
01:32:16,686 --> 01:32:19,354
Give me your
nothing face.
1429
01:32:23,023 --> 01:32:25,223
You see?
You do it wrong.
1430
01:32:25,859 --> 01:32:28,142
You're giving me
your clown face.
1431
01:32:28,444 --> 01:32:30,977
Or... I don't know...
your person face.
1432
01:32:31,196 --> 01:32:32,561
Try a plant face.
1433
01:32:34,156 --> 01:32:36,898
If you look scared
it's not funny.
1434
01:32:37,117 --> 01:32:39,680
People pay to laugh,
not feel guilty.
1435
01:32:40,034 --> 01:32:40,858
Let's see.
1436
01:32:41,119 --> 01:32:42,359
Watch Nino.
1437
01:32:44,746 --> 01:32:45,611
He takes it.
1438
01:32:46,706 --> 01:32:47,978
He's great.
1439
01:32:48,957 --> 01:32:52,074
Look at that absent stare.
Total distance.
1440
01:32:52,376 --> 01:32:55,660
That expression.
Beyond good and evil.
1441
01:32:56,212 --> 01:32:57,401
And he pouts.
1442
01:32:59,423 --> 01:33:00,872
That's fucking art.
1443
01:33:05,761 --> 01:33:08,044
Don't close your eyes!
1444
01:33:08,680 --> 01:33:10,796
Oh shit!
He's crying!
1445
01:33:11,055 --> 01:33:14,714
This is comedy!
Don't get all dramatic...
1446
01:33:15,767 --> 01:33:18,331
-Should I get that?
-Don't move!
1447
01:33:24,106 --> 01:33:25,263
Hello?
1448
01:33:26,108 --> 01:33:27,129
Yes?
1449
01:33:29,193 --> 01:33:30,433
It's him!
1450
01:33:57,754 --> 01:33:59,786
Mr. Bruno, please.
One question.
1451
01:34:00,005 --> 01:34:03,247
-Shut the fuck up!
-One second, please.
1452
01:34:03,550 --> 01:34:05,082
I knew he'd be back.
1453
01:34:05,301 --> 01:34:07,917
But you didn't explain
this to me.
1454
01:34:08,136 --> 01:34:11,420
-Is it part of the show?
-Exactly. Part of the show.
1455
01:34:12,306 --> 01:34:14,255
I forgot my
penholder.
1456
01:34:14,474 --> 01:34:17,089
Forget it. Stay put,
you understand?
1457
01:34:17,308 --> 01:34:19,049
-But...
-No buts and no crap!
1458
01:34:19,977 --> 01:34:22,374
Christ!
The bathroom window!
1459
01:34:40,074 --> 01:34:43,108
Extra Casting Services?
This is Angelito.
1460
01:34:43,327 --> 01:34:45,693
I'm calling
to say I quit.
1461
01:34:45,953 --> 01:34:48,861
This comedy stuff
isn't funny.
1462
01:34:49,080 --> 01:34:52,488
Get me out of here.
I'm scared shitless.
1463
01:34:53,082 --> 01:34:54,406
Hello.
How are you?
1464
01:34:55,709 --> 01:34:59,702
You must be little Tino.
Why don't you come with me?
1465
01:35:01,922 --> 01:35:03,246
Get these shoes off.
1466
01:35:03,465 --> 01:35:06,206
The agency didn't
mention a suitcase.
1467
01:35:06,425 --> 01:35:09,292
Improvisation, Tino.
It's fundamental.
1468
01:35:09,511 --> 01:35:11,543
-Are you sure?
-Of course.
1469
01:35:12,096 --> 01:35:13,670
Okay. Stop breathing.
1470
01:35:19,475 --> 01:35:20,580
Nino.
1471
01:35:24,812 --> 01:35:27,720
Tino...
You want to play, eh?
1472
01:35:34,194 --> 01:35:36,435
This is no
surprise.
1473
01:35:38,864 --> 01:35:41,480
I'm going to enjoy
killing you.
1474
01:35:41,866 --> 01:35:45,639
Then I'll go do the show
with that little clown.
1475
01:35:45,952 --> 01:35:47,443
He's much better
than you.
1476
01:35:49,288 --> 01:35:51,820
You're trapped, Nino.
1477
01:35:52,706 --> 01:35:55,989
Where's that flabby body
of yours? Under the bed?
1478
01:36:04,673 --> 01:36:07,873
Nino! Where are
you taking me?
1479
01:36:08,467 --> 01:36:09,541
Mr. Nino.
1480
01:36:10,718 --> 01:36:11,876
Nino!
1481
01:36:27,771 --> 01:36:30,137
Why do you make this
so difficult?
1482
01:36:31,941 --> 01:36:33,014
Nino.
1483
01:36:34,526 --> 01:36:36,267
I'm coming for you.
1484
01:36:36,694 --> 01:36:38,018
I can't breathe.
1485
01:36:38,237 --> 01:36:39,602
10 years waiting for this.
1486
01:36:41,364 --> 01:36:43,272
It's like singing the
lottery numbers again.
1487
01:36:43,574 --> 01:36:45,398
Twenty four thousand,
three hundred...
1488
01:36:45,617 --> 01:36:47,233
fifty six.
1489
01:36:47,994 --> 01:36:48,901
Two hundred million...
1490
01:36:56,249 --> 01:36:58,114
You hurt yourself, Bruno.
1491
01:37:01,419 --> 01:37:04,869
Yes, Mr. Judge.
He was drunk, as usual.
1492
01:37:05,130 --> 01:37:07,246
He went to light
the chimney,
1493
01:37:07,465 --> 01:37:10,165
and his piece of shit
little girly robe
1494
01:37:10,467 --> 01:37:13,459
that he wore to feel
important caught fire.
1495
01:37:14,428 --> 01:37:16,794
The keys!
And fucking shut up!
1496
01:37:21,058 --> 01:37:24,258
Actually, sir, it was
probably a suicide.
1497
01:37:24,477 --> 01:37:26,842
You know he was
very unstable.
1498
01:37:27,061 --> 01:37:29,677
He was a loser and
his luck ran out.
1499
01:37:31,564 --> 01:37:35,682
But, who really cares how that
cockroach died, Mr. Judge?
1500
01:37:36,401 --> 01:37:39,267
-What are you doing?
-Heating things up.
1501
01:37:40,320 --> 01:37:42,603
Burn my house, and
yours burns too.
1502
01:37:42,822 --> 01:37:45,772
No, no. Remember?
I live in prison!
1503
01:37:47,325 --> 01:37:49,191
I'm going to take
out the trash.
1504
01:37:49,410 --> 01:37:51,026
Where are you going?
1505
01:37:52,412 --> 01:37:53,944
Good-bye, Bruno!
1506
01:37:54,747 --> 01:37:56,821
Thanks for ruining
my life!
1507
01:38:10,549 --> 01:38:12,790
You wanted to
replace me, eh?
1508
01:38:17,971 --> 01:38:20,671
Little Tino's
very funny.
1509
01:38:21,015 --> 01:38:23,006
There's a joke
you don't know.
1510
01:38:23,808 --> 01:38:26,008
The one about the
Mandinga tribe.
1511
01:38:26,268 --> 01:38:29,958
Where they find a dwarf in
a suitcase in the desert!
1512
01:38:41,361 --> 01:38:43,102
Get out. You'll
stain the leather.
1513
01:38:43,738 --> 01:38:44,926
And if I don't?
1514
01:38:45,156 --> 01:38:46,771
You'll stain
the leather.
1515
01:38:47,282 --> 01:38:48,231
What's going on?
1516
01:38:48,491 --> 01:38:49,231
Are you crazy?
1517
01:38:49,450 --> 01:38:50,555
I'm calling
the police.
1518
01:38:50,826 --> 01:38:54,151
Get off my lawn or I'll shoot!
This is our house!
1519
01:38:54,579 --> 01:38:56,820
Don't talk to him.
He's dangerous.
1520
01:38:57,039 --> 01:38:59,197
That's it.
Don't talk to me.
1521
01:38:59,457 --> 01:39:01,073
There's a hole in my foot
and I'm nervous.
1522
01:39:01,334 --> 01:39:04,783
They're degenerate pigs,
like everyone on TV.
1523
01:39:05,085 --> 01:39:07,952
Shut up, lady.
Put your teeth back in.
1524
01:39:08,671 --> 01:39:09,495
Get out.
1525
01:39:10,089 --> 01:39:11,913
You'll kill me in front
of all these people?
1526
01:39:12,174 --> 01:39:12,997
Are you shy?
1527
01:39:13,466 --> 01:39:17,625
I don't care. I'm stalling.
The cops will be here any minute.
1528
01:39:17,886 --> 01:39:21,503
They'll throw you in jail.
We'll be together again.
1529
01:39:21,722 --> 01:39:24,714
The show's at 7. The studio's
half an hour away.
1530
01:39:25,475 --> 01:39:26,465
Forty minutes.
1531
01:39:26,684 --> 01:39:28,049
Get out of the car.
1532
01:39:28,268 --> 01:39:29,634
-What are you doing?
-I'm out of here!
1533
01:39:43,695 --> 01:39:45,894
He's going to
the studio!
1534
01:39:46,113 --> 01:39:48,396
And with that idiot!
1535
01:40:12,964 --> 01:40:16,123
Tino, are you all right?
Knock a couple times.
1536
01:40:17,384 --> 01:40:20,053
Relax, man.
Everything's fine.
1537
01:40:20,261 --> 01:40:24,170
Get some rest.
Or go over your jokes.
1538
01:40:24,931 --> 01:40:28,131
Like I said.
You need discipline.
1539
01:40:32,770 --> 01:40:36,137
Friends forever...
1540
01:40:38,773 --> 01:40:40,045
Looking for me?
1541
01:40:41,525 --> 01:40:42,766
Here I am.
1542
01:40:43,902 --> 01:40:46,518
He's shooting at me!
1543
01:40:48,488 --> 01:40:49,729
You want to play?
1544
01:41:03,207 --> 01:41:04,395
Fucking asshole!
1545
01:41:51,156 --> 01:41:53,063
It's okay.
I'm all right.
1546
01:41:53,282 --> 01:41:55,648
Thank God. I thought
it was too late.
1547
01:42:00,162 --> 01:42:01,027
Shit!
1548
01:42:15,964 --> 01:42:17,152
We'd better leave.
1549
01:42:17,590 --> 01:42:19,289
The police won't be long.
1550
01:42:19,675 --> 01:42:21,332
What do I tell
the studio?
1551
01:42:22,135 --> 01:42:23,917
I can't believe it.
1552
01:42:24,136 --> 01:42:26,919
That man has been
through hell!
1553
01:42:27,138 --> 01:42:28,921
Always thinking
of yourself.
1554
01:42:29,181 --> 01:42:30,839
You put him in
a suitcase!
1555
01:42:32,934 --> 01:42:35,384
I should have let those
legionaries kill you.
1556
01:42:35,602 --> 01:42:37,218
There's still time.
1557
01:42:40,356 --> 01:42:44,213
I've spent my whole life fucking
you over. I can't anymore.
1558
01:42:44,901 --> 01:42:45,973
Me neither.
1559
01:42:46,442 --> 01:42:47,714
Even Laura.
1560
01:42:50,237 --> 01:42:52,853
I fucked her just
to piss you off.
1561
01:42:53,072 --> 01:42:54,438
I didn't even
like her.
1562
01:42:54,657 --> 01:42:56,272
I was in love
with her.
1563
01:42:56,700 --> 01:42:59,483
Are you fucking
jealous of me?
1564
01:42:59,702 --> 01:43:01,067
Yes, I am.
Yes!
1565
01:43:01,286 --> 01:43:02,693
But why?
1566
01:43:03,913 --> 01:43:06,738
You're smarter,
better-looking,
1567
01:43:07,666 --> 01:43:09,198
and taller than me.
1568
01:43:09,417 --> 01:43:10,240
So?
1569
01:43:11,293 --> 01:43:14,983
What's the point?
You're the greatest.
1570
01:43:15,254 --> 01:43:16,787
You're innately funny.
1571
01:43:17,588 --> 01:43:19,913
I don't even
come close.
1572
01:43:20,716 --> 01:43:22,415
I'm nobody
without you.
1573
01:43:24,510 --> 01:43:27,335
Knowing that makes
me rot inside.
1574
01:43:29,597 --> 01:43:31,463
I never wanted
to be funny.
1575
01:43:31,723 --> 01:43:34,840
I just wanted people
to respect me.
1576
01:43:35,226 --> 01:43:36,925
Like they respect you.
1577
01:43:39,354 --> 01:43:42,804
I'm just a clown.
A fucking clown!
1578
01:43:44,524 --> 01:43:47,349
And I can't take
it anymore.
1579
01:43:52,654 --> 01:43:54,978
-They're here.
-What do we do?
1580
01:43:55,322 --> 01:43:59,096
I don't know.
I guess it's too late.
1581
01:44:00,743 --> 01:44:02,984
Come on.
Let's go out in style.
1582
01:44:09,082 --> 01:44:11,198
Anything but here
in the gutter.
1583
01:44:11,959 --> 01:44:14,033
This is pathetic.
1584
01:44:14,419 --> 01:44:16,983
Imagine the photo in
the paper tomorrow.
1585
01:44:17,213 --> 01:44:19,287
Covered with mud,
blood and shit...
1586
01:44:19,548 --> 01:44:21,871
Besides, without
an audience...
1587
01:44:23,216 --> 01:44:27,250
Let's do it right. With class.
It could be mythical.
1588
01:44:27,719 --> 01:44:29,293
We're the best, right?
1589
01:44:30,805 --> 01:44:31,753
Bruno...
1590
01:44:32,889 --> 01:44:33,880
and Nino.
1591
01:44:45,607 --> 01:44:47,348
You know the rest.
1592
01:44:48,525 --> 01:44:50,725
Nino and Bruno did
their last show,
1593
01:44:50,986 --> 01:44:53,653
and people died laughing,
one last time.
1594
01:44:53,862 --> 01:44:57,687
Juli�n, come on.
Hurry up.
1595
01:44:59,991 --> 01:45:01,148
Say what you want,
1596
01:45:01,409 --> 01:45:04,734
but I think they're
still breathing.
1597
01:45:05,370 --> 01:45:06,558
No, they're dead.
1598
01:45:06,829 --> 01:45:09,571
Make up your mind!
Two lives are at stake.
1599
01:45:09,831 --> 01:45:12,739
Lay off, slick!
1600
01:45:13,000 --> 01:45:14,366
I can only do bandages.
1601
01:45:14,626 --> 01:45:16,826
You're supposed
to be a doctor.
1602
01:45:17,045 --> 01:45:18,118
I'm only an objector.
1603
01:45:18,379 --> 01:45:19,244
What?
1604
01:45:19,463 --> 01:45:22,663
I didn't want to do
my military service.
1605
01:45:22,965 --> 01:45:25,207
Do something.
Anything!
1606
01:45:25,466 --> 01:45:27,415
Anything?
1607
01:45:27,843 --> 01:45:28,948
The only...
1608
01:45:29,177 --> 01:45:29,834
What?
1609
01:45:30,053 --> 01:45:31,074
The defibrillator.
1610
01:45:31,304 --> 01:45:32,294
What?
1611
01:45:32,513 --> 01:45:35,755
The defibrillator. It
gives an electric charge.
1612
01:45:36,099 --> 01:45:38,256
Here.
Come on.
1613
01:45:38,892 --> 01:45:40,299
Turn it up.
1614
01:45:42,478 --> 01:45:44,261
Easy, easy.
1615
01:45:44,730 --> 01:45:47,013
They could blame
us for this.
1616
01:45:49,108 --> 01:45:49,973
Fuck!
1617
01:45:53,152 --> 01:45:54,143
How sad.
1618
01:45:54,445 --> 01:45:56,728
20 years and they're
exactly the same.
1619
01:45:56,988 --> 01:45:58,176
Well, worse.
1620
01:45:59,781 --> 01:46:02,147
Doctor, tell me the truth.
1621
01:46:02,700 --> 01:46:04,691
Will they make it?
1622
01:46:04,910 --> 01:46:07,901
I don't know.
They should be dead.
1623
01:46:08,120 --> 01:46:09,986
They're in critical
condition.
1624
01:46:10,539 --> 01:46:14,114
But there's something,
I don't know what...
1625
01:46:14,625 --> 01:46:18,242
An energy, a mysterious
force keeping them alive.
1626
01:46:18,461 --> 01:46:21,025
-An energy?
-Do you know what it could be?
1627
01:46:22,172 --> 01:46:24,329
Yes, I think so.
1628
01:46:25,257 --> 01:46:27,457
It's hard to explain.
1629
01:47:17,000 --> 01:47:21,618
DYING OF LAUGHTER115900
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