All language subtitles for Cybill s03e15 in her dreams

And for outstanding performance by an
actress in a leading role, the award

to Sybil Sheridan for Scent of a Man.

I won!

Oh, right!

Oh no, darn it! I'm dreaming.

Are you sure?

Well, I'm naked, aren't I?

It's that stupid dream from high school,
where I'm naked in homeroom or algebra

class, or in front of the entire student
body at the homecoming game.

No, wait.

That actually happened.

So this is a dream.

Well, that explains how all these dead
celebrities happen to make it.

Listen, there's just a few seconds
before I wake up.

This may be as close as I ever get to
that award.

I'm going for it.

No problem. Just dreaming.

Oh, no. I'm waking up. Quick.

Toss it. Toss it. Toss it.

Damn. so close.

Well, I'm still sleepy.

Maybe I can get the dream back.

The award goes to... goes to... goes
to...

Anna Thompson!

Whoa! Nice butt, Emma.

Nice work if you can get it. And if you
get it, won't you tell me

how?

So Emma Thompson got best actress and
you got nothing?

Nothing. And I was really mad.

So Streep and I egged her Porsche.

And where was I when this happened? In
the bathroom with Tony Curtis.

Again?

in your dreams.

I didn't have a dorsal fin this time,
did I?

I've been having these dreams every
night since I got fired from Lifeform.

I'm obviously having some anxiety about
my career.

Oh, Sybil, something will come up.
Remember when you lost your recurring

Richie Brockleman Private Eye? You
thought you'd never work again and then

Joanie loves Chachi.

You're right.

Darling, you need to pamper yourself.

A nice steam bath of facial, and then a
rub down from some glistening swede with

no body hair.

Hey, we'll do it today.

What about your appointment?

What appointment? Oh, no, you are not
putting off your mammography again. You

already missed your late 30s baseline
mammogram.

I'm dating a doctor, and he doesn't
suggest mammograms for any of his

He's a vet. His patients are poodles.

That's right.

And they have way more breasts than we
do.

Besides, I have a date with the new Dr.
Richard tonight. And if he's a good boy,

I'm going to let him jump up on my bed.

Wait a minute.

Last week you were going to dump him
because he had the same name as Dr.

And now you're ready to do the monkey
dance with him?

How did it get this far without me
knowing?

It's just that things haven't been going
that well for you lately, and I didn't

want my good news to depress you.

Why would I be depressed?

Because you have a boyfriend and I
don't? Because you're happy with your

whereas I was becoming a star and now
they make me audition to answer phones

telephone?

Marianne, hold me!

Uh, excuse me, man in the room.

Please refrain from using expressions
like bloating and plastic applicator.

I have to go anyway. Cheer up!

Maybe Richard won't be what I'm
expecting.

You know, I could be very disappointed.

Aw, you'd do that for me.

So, Kevin, it's just you and me.

Jobless and free.

Let's knock off the liquor store and
escape to Arizona.

You drive, so I can moon the truckers.

Gee, can it wait until the weekend? I'm
running a little late.

Where are you going?

Well, actually, I got a job yesterday.
I'm teaching third grade at a small

private school. It's not at all what I
was looking for. It's probably a bad

career move, but, you know.

No, it sounds great.

It is. I'm really sorry.

Stop it!

Why is everyone trying so hard to spare
my feelings?

You never do that when I want you to.

Hey, Sid. Hey, Kev. Hey. Ira, what's up?

Well, I have some news.

Oh, not now.

Please. I am not a wounded bird.

Ira, just tell me straight out. Show
Kevin how it's done.

Okay. I'm being audited by the IRS. And
since we're married at the time, so are

you.

See?

Hey. Hey.

Where's Mom? I thought you guys were
working on your audit. We broke for

See, I explained some of my deductions.

She explained that I should have a
little snack and die.

I'm paraphrasing.

Are they going to repossess your house?

Because I thought I could maybe live in
it while you're in prison.

Be strong, Zoe, for me.

What's in the box?

Some of Mom's stuff. She was throwing it
upstairs, and I took it by mistake when

I moved. I thought it might have some of
her records in it. Did you look?

And become part of your nefarious tax
evasion ring?

I've never seen that box before in my
life.

By the way, this conversation never
happened, Mr. Woodbine, if that is your

name.

No, no records, just some old pictures
and stuff.

Whoa, here we are, my cousin Artie's
wedding in 1977.

Oh, man, look at your suit.

And your hair, who are you trying to be,
Ira X?

Yeah, I wore it big in those days.

And did anyone tell Mom the 60s were
over? That granny dress makes her look

huge. That isn't the dress, honey.

It's you.

Oh.

Well, it's the only way I ever would
have been seen with you people.

Mr. Woodbine, Brad Mark, CPA from Farmer
and Frank. I'm here to work with you on

an audit. Am I glad to see you. Come in.

Zip, pad, work your magic.

Hey, Pete. Don't worry, Mr. Woodbine. I
haven't lost an audit yet.

Well, I asked around.

They say you're the best. Because I
focus on each case completely. No

distractions. I don't chat. I don't
schmooze. I don't laugh. Which means

have to put these pictures away.

Hey, Dad. Oh, I'm sorry. Zoe, this is
Brad Marks, my CPA.

Brad, this is Zoe, my deduction.

Hi. Oh, my God.

Is... Is he okay?

Honey, you need to leave now.

Brad, come on, boy. No distractions.

But she's an angel.

Don't do this to me. I'll never make it
in the big house. I'm too pretty.

And for outstanding performance by an
actress in a leading role, the award

to Sybil Sheridan for Her Left Foot.

Okay, even I can tell it's a dream.

All right, here I go.

I made it. Gimme, gimme, gimme.

Oh, wait.

This isn't right.

Fine, I'll take it back.

No, no, no, I was daydreaming.

And you were just about to give me the
award for best actress.

Really? Did they like me? Did they
really, really like me?

I don't remember much, except that you
did a singing tribute to the Baldwin

brothers.

That is so weird.

I have the same dream all the time.

Richard, I can't hear you. What did you
say?

Oh, well, if you can hear this, I'll see
you tonight.

or a chin like Patton?

I've been told both, you know.

Did you and the distinguished doctor
play hide the weenie last night?

It didn't happen.

He had to assist in the delivery of a
baby elephant at the zoo.

Oh, charming.

In a doctor -y sort of way.

I'm ashamed to say that due to the fact
that the former doctor dick.

to break his promise to me and God.

I followed him.

Marianne, you stalked the good dick?

I'm not proud of it.

But when I saw his arms and shoulders
disappear into the back of that

I wanted him right there.

For future reference, next time you tell
that story, just say we had a date, he

had to go to the zoo.

So how is your mammogram?

How is the audit?

You didn't do it, did you?

Well, last night was supposed to be
special, and I didn't want it on my

Marianne, I know you're nervous, and
with your family history, that's

understandable, but it's all the more
reason to do it. Okay, okay, you're

I'll go tomorrow.

Good.

Make the appointment right now. I said
I'd go.

That should satisfy you.

I need something a little more binding.

Pinky swear.

Oh, that was ridiculous. And I'll thank
you very much to treat me like an adult.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to
tinkle.

Aha! I knew it.

This is avoiding, not tinkling.

Sybil, please.

It's my life. Stop controlling it.
That's not what I'm doing. I'm your

care about you. I know what you're
doing. Now that you're out of work, I've

become your little project.

Sybil, if you need to take care of
somebody so much, start with yourself.

job.

Ouch.

Where'd that come from?

You need to back off, Sybil. Stop
nagging me and find something else to

because right now, you're a big pain in
the ass.

Yeah, well, I...

Stuff I could use against you and left
the rest.

More in the cart.

Do you need help? I could help. Please,
let me help.

Okay.

Um, Bill, right?

That's fine.

So, we lose everything to the IRS.

You can't take it with you, right?

Ira, I'm in no mood.

I had a huge fight with Marianne. And
she went out of her way to really hurt

And all I was doing was trying to get
her to take care of herself. And I was

totally right and she was totally wrong.

Yeah. Sort of makes the daughter thing
seem like nothing.

No, I've got enough mad to handle both.

Okay, listen. I promise I won't make you
pay for any of my stupid mistakes.

Deal?

Deal.

Look at all this stuff.

Candles, incense.

Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

I love this book.

It was a deep, lasting spiritual
awakening.

And it was really short.

My God, Sybil. Is that hash?

Let me see.

Not the tootsie roll.

These things last forever.

Look at all this stuff.

Tickets up to Rocky. Why'd you keep
these?

I don't know.

Oh, probably because I tried out for it,
remember?

Excuse me?

But I got you the audition.

And you drove me to the casting office.

It was so sweet.

And I was such a wreck.

Oh, Ira, I'm not dressed right.

Why?

Adrian's supposed to work in a pet
store. This is earthy.

You're shaking.

I'm a little nervous.

It's my first big movie audition.

Oh, Sybil, it's no big deal. Besides,
you're exactly what Stallone's looking

for. At least I think you are. I mean,
I'm a tax attorney. I love the guy. But

you can't understand a word he says.

I have to get back to the office.

Maybe later we can grab a quick dinner
and get married.

Ira, I've told you already. I'm never
getting married again.

It's not my thing.

But I love you, baby.

I want to be next to you. Always.

Don't go all Barry White on me, okay?

All right.

Dinner at least? You got it. Oh, good.
And don't get nervous.

You'll be great. Want to go over your
lines one more time? Okay.

Ready? Mm -hmm.

Adrian. Rocky.

Adrian. Rocky.

Adrian!

You're right. This movie sucks.

See you later.

Hello?

Rocky... Auditioning place?

I really don't know.

Well, I'm sorry. I only answered because
there's nobody... He just...

I stepped out for five minutes to grab a
sandwich.

Why?

Because the phone's been ringing off the
hook all morning and she hasn't even

had a chance to pee, so get off her
back, Wayne.

Thank you so much. You're welcome.

You handled that just as I would have.

Of course, I'm a temp. We're trained not
to care.

Do this. Why? Do I have lipstick?

I knew it.

face commercial.

Your teeth are so clean.

Face clean.

Okay. I like you.

You go to the head of the list.

What's your name?

Sybil Sheridan. Sybil.

I'm Marianne Thorpe.

Hi. Hi. Have a Tootsie Roll. Oh, thanks.

I'll take a few for later.

Is that your boyfriend?

Oh, no. It's my husband.

He's in med school, which is why I'm
working my fingers to the bone.

Are you married?

Once. I caught him cheating.

Oh, no. What did you do?

I threw him out of a moving car.

No.

He's a stud man. He talked, he rolled,
he was home before I was.

So I figured nothing's going to kill
this man. I'm going to have to divorce

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Don't be. I learned my lesson. I'm
totally over it. Good for you.

It's terrible how some women can't let
go after a divorce.

They just get obsessed and do the
craziest thing.

Name? Dick Thorpe.

Dr. Dick, huh?

That's funny.

Of course, I could never call him that.

That would really make him mad.

Yes,

Mr. Stallone?

What?

You're giddy?

You want to go steady?

Oh, you're ready.

Okay,

sir. I'll just send the first one right
in.

Okay.

I pick you.

Yikes. Hey, just be yourself and say yo
a lot.

Are you having any fun? What you getting
out of living?

What good is what you've got if you're
not having any fun?

Oh, I was scared. My grandmother used to
sing that to me. How do you know it? My

mother used to sing it. Really?

To herself.

Well, okay.

Here I go. Wish me luck.

You don't need it.

Hey, wait a minute.

These actresses are all tall and blonde.

Hey, wait a minute. I specifically said,
if they get married, you're going to

wear anything.

Hey, listen. Just give me that woman
from The Godfather, all right?

I'm sorry.

Looks like you lost the part to Diane
Keaton.

Oh, hey, that's okay.

You still got the squeakiest teeth in
Hollywood.

Thanks. For everything.

Hey, no problem.

Good luck with the, uh, acting thing.

You too.

It's a Dr. Dick thing.

Dr.

Dick.

Hey, Marianne.

Why don't you let me take you out to
lunch?

You haven't even finished your sandwich.

Oh.

Well, yeah, okay. I can call from the
restaurant.

Yeah, come on. We'll get a burger and a
beer.

Oh, I don't know.

I'm not much of a drinker.

If I were talking to you, I would tell
you how much I hate you for forcing me

come here.

Don't care. So there.

I can't let them put my breasts in one
of those flattening machines.

What if they don't pop back?

Emily. No, you are having your
mammogram.

I can't handle it.

Radiation? Chemotherapy? Whoa, slow
down.

Nothing's happened.

What if something does happen? What if
everything's okay, which it probably is?

Sybil, my aunt had it.

My grandmother had it.

That's why we're here.

You know, but I'd really rather not
know. I mean, what would I do?

And what would my new Richard think of
me?

Marianne, I hope it works out with
Richard.

But you know who's going to be here?

No matter what?

Me. Oh, please.

I've had two husbands, and I don't know
how many boyfriends come and go.

I've seen my children grow up and move
out and move back in again.

Through it all, you've been there for
me.

Since the first day we met, remember?

Wait a minute.

You know what?

You're going to be taking care of me
when I get old. So you have to stay

and strong. So after the mammogram,
we're going to the dentist.

And then Thursday, we have the eye
doctor, the bone density exam.

And intestinal screening.

Then I got a ticket to Shoba.

You know, I said some horrible, spiteful
things to you.

And you came back.

Thank you.

Mrs. Thorpe?

I'm scared to death.

I'm coming with you.

Are you having any fun?

Once you get 9 -11, what good is what
you've got if

you're not having any fun?

And I would like to thank you all for
making this the best dream I've ever

I want to start off by making amends to
Emma Thompson for trashing her car.

But it was Streep's idea.

I first decided I wanted to be an
actress in high school. This could take

while. It's a dream, so there's no time
limit on the speech.

Patrons go with your mammogram.

Oh, you know about that?

Not in real life.

Nobody tells me anything in real life.

It was negative in real life. Oh, good.
Oh, I'm so relieved.

So is Steve.

Any audit?

I owe $8 ,000.

She doesn't have to pay any of it.
Really?

In her dreams.

Speaking of which, you'd think after
three or four of these, she'd put me in

different dress.

Yeah, well, I just wish she'd stop
dragging me into her little subconscious

fantasy world.

Now I'd like to show you one
unforgettable moment from my career.

In this now classic scene, I paved the
way to happiness for Joanie and Chachi.