All language subtitles for cybill_s02e03_since_i_lost_my_baby

Granny snack cakes, they're a little
taste of heaven.

Granny snack cakes!

Granny snack cakes!

Now I know why they call you guys grits!

Is that from the top?

Hold it!

Hold it! Hold it! Hold it!

What the hell kind of angel is this?

Who's that?

That's Granny.

Granny? I'm sorry, Miss Belmont. It's
not my fault she told me she could

Hey, I can skate!

Listen to me carefully.

Angels don't skate.

They fly.

I can fly!

Flying. No problem. We'll have it set up
by tomorrow.

Sybil, you're wrapped. 8 a .m. tomorrow.

You know, I'm so mad I could fire the
whole bunch of you.

married to a stuntman named Jeff Robin.

Why? What'd he do to you?

He married me.

You don't remember? Terry Belmont, wife
number two.

Terry? I don't believe this.

How are you? Oh, rich and pregnant.

How about you?

Not rich and not on your life.

You know, I never got to thank you.

For what?

Remember?

Before I married Jeff, you gave me some
great advice.

You told me I should hock the ring and
run like hell.

I give that advice to all of Jeff's
fiancés. They never listen, but it's

for my karma.

So you remarried, huh?

Oh, no, no, no, no. After Jeff, I swore
I'd never get married again.

She wanted a baby, and he wanted a
vasectomy. So, without him knowing, she

some of his sperm frozen.

Without him knowing?

How?

I didn't ask. Why not?

I didn't know how to phrase the
question.

But why Jeff's sperm?

She could have a Nobel laureate. Why
settle for Zippy the stuntman?

She's hoping that the baby gets his
athletic skills and her smarts. What if

turns out the other way around?

You're going to tell it?

Well, I don't know. I mean, on one hand,
I feel that Jeff has a moral and legal

right to know he's going to be a parent.

But I also feel that what the first ex
-husband's second ex -wife does with her

ex -husband's sperm is none of the first
ex -wife's business.

I believe Miss Manners did a column on
that.

Stop being so paranoid. I'm not
paranoid. Well, then let me hold him.

Willie. His name is Willie, and your
hands aren't clean.

Yes, they are. Well, you got a call. No,
I don't. You might drop him. I'll be

careful.

He's my baby. You can't play with him,
okay?

Hey, it's Big Willie.

His name?

William.

Mom, is the bottle almost ready?

Coming right up. I thought you were
breastfeeding.

I'm just taking a little break.

Why do you need a break? Weren't you the
one who said breastfeeding is the most

beautiful, natural way a mother can bond
with her child?

He bites, okay?

Just like the two of you.

You two made my nipples so sore they
look like chocolate.

What?

We should be able to discuss the womanly
art of breastfeeding.

Did you rub that sheep lanolin I gave
you on your nipples? Fine,

live in the 50s.

Okay, let Grandma feed Billy Boy, Billy
Boy. It's William, Mother.

And I'll feed him. If you don't hold the
bottle just right, he gets real gassy.

Rachel? I know how to feed a baby.

If I didn't, you and Zoe would be dead.

Surprise!

Oh, look, it's Frosty the Sperm Man.

Ixnay on the erms bay.

Look, William, a new stroke.

Not just a stroller, a Parego stroller.
Top of the line. Compliments of Grandpa

Jeff. And Step -Grandpa Ira. Daddy, Ira,
thank you. That is so sweet.

You're welcome. All right.

Nothing's too good for the Willinator.

It's William.

William, William, William. Not Billy.
Not Big Willie. Not Billy Boy. And

definitely not the Willinator.

How about Q -Ball?

Or Gumby. Can we call him Gumby?

You ever notice how old babies look like
Nikita Khrushchev?

He does not. He looks like me.

Don't you think, Sim? Yeah, especially
when he sucks on his foot.

Tell me, Jeff, have you ever thought
about having more children of your own?

Sure, all the time.

Of course, my dad days are over. Had a
vasectomy.

Snip, snip.

Snip, snip. What'd you do, go to
Supercuts?

You know, I thought I didn't want any
more kids.

But looking at Willie, it makes me sorry
I did it.

I really think I'd be a much better
father now.

I don't know, he's crying over spilt
milk.

Not when you've got frozen yogurt.

What's that supposed to mean?

Jeff, come sit down.

How should I put this?

Do you know how they say that frozen
orange juice is just as good as fresh

squeeze?

Granny's Snack Cakes. They're a little
taste of heaven.

That was wrong, wasn't it?

Bring her down.

Let's chat while Scorsese here
contemplates his future in the garment

I'll fix it, Miss Bellman.

Listen, as long as I'm just hanging out
here, ha ha, there's something you

should probably know.

I'm here to see Terry Belmont.

You may want to fire me, but Jeff had a
right to know, so I told him about the

baby, and he's very upset, and he may
come here to talk to you about it. No,

there he is now.

Jeff. Jeff, I was just telling Terry.
Not now, Sid.

I just want you to answer.

Jesus, you got big.

Good start, Jeff.

What are you doing here?

Is that my baby? None of your business.
The hell it isn't. Maybe you two should

sit down over coffee and talk.

Except when you're doing it with my
sperm. How'd you get it anyway?

I'm sure curious.

Now you're keeping track of your sperm?
Gee, you weren't that particular when we

were married. She's got a point.

I have the right to know my own child.

I just want to be part of its life.

His life.

It's a boy.

Security! Hey, we don't need security.

This isn't over, Terry.

Come on, you two!

Uh, that's one hour for lunch.

Get over this. You're going to get me
fired.

Jeff, I'm going through a canyon.

Oops.

Lost him.

What a shame.

Well, let's see if we can find something
chic for young William.

Welcome to Le Fond Elite.

My name is Paolo.

Do you have an appointment?

No, I was just looking for an infant T
-shirt. Maybe something with Muppet

babies on it.

Muppet babies?

We have Versace, Armani, Ferragamo, but
no Muppet babies.

Okay, we'll just look around.

Sentiment. A glass of Chardonnay while
you browse?

No, thanks. He's trying to cut back.

Just put his in my glass.

Could the store be any more pretentious?
Do you want your grandson to be a power

baby or just one of the great unwiped?

Thank God he's already got the right
stroller.

$200?

Computers don't cost that much. I know,
dear. I wouldn't brag about it.

My turn to drive.

Probably Jeff.

Look,

a tiny tuxedo. Isn't that adorable?

Now that I've finally gotten Rachel to
trust me with William, I am not about to

bring him home dressed like Bert Parks.

Imported from Italy.

Virgin wool.

$400? Excluding cufflinks.

Perfect for the Oscars. He doesn't go to
the Oscars. He's a musician.

Come on, Marianne. Oh, at least let him
try it on.

Marianne. What?

Oh, right.

It's a baby.

Cute as a dickens.

You forgot the baby.

Oh, my.

Talk about your faux pas.

bottle of tequila, you would have
remembered him.

Right. Like you never left anything in a
door.

Nothing I was related to.

Rachel's trying to reach you. Oh, I
forgot to turn my phone back on. Tell

what, next time my son is in town, you
can take him anywhere you want and leave

him there.

I thought Kevin and Rachel went to the
movies. Yeah, she called from the

theater. By the way, she said I could
play with the baby if I wanted to.

Okay. You can change his diaper.

I walked right into that, didn't I?

Yep, you're getting rusty.

Zoe knows how to change a diaper.

Are you kidding? She used to change her
own.

Why'd you turn your phone off? I didn't
want to talk to you.

You don't have to talk to me. You have
to talk to Terry.

She keeps hanging up on me. Maybe she
doesn't know how to turn her phone off.

Look, Sib, I just want to be part of
this kid's life.

Well, why don't you tell her what you
told me today?

That now you know how to be a good
father. She won't listen to me.

Mom, could you come in here for a
minute?

Jeff, I'm busy now.

Please, Sib. She likes you.

Mom!

I said no!

So, the Iceman cometh.

I'm not an expert in the area, but
aren't boys usually supposed to have a

That is not William.

That's a girl.

Yeah, that was my take on it.

Oh, my God. We must have taken the wrong
stroller, Barry.

That is the worst circumcision I've ever
seen.

Well, thank God you're still here.

Remember me? I was here about an hour
ago.

But of course, the Muppet Baby Lady.

Now, you listen to me. Let me handle
this.

Signor Paolo, here's our predicamento.

Somehow, my absent -minded friend
managed to leave your store with the

baby. You only left the store with the
wrong baby because you left the baby in

the middle of the store. You want a
nitpick or you want to find a baby?

So you see, obviously one of your other
customers has our baby.

Oh, how terrible for you.

Unfortunately, we're about to close.

You listen to me, you phony Euro trash
ferret.

That is not my grandbaby.

Somebody else has my grandbaby.

And you're going to help us find it,
capiche?

You're a grandmother? You're so young.

Really?

Somebody's having your baby and won't
let you be part of it.

The final fruit of your loins.

I still don't understand what she was
doing with your loin fruit in the first

place.

Well, I used to drink a lot.

I didn't always pay attention to what
she was doing.

Wait a second. You mean she... No, I
don't want to know.

I really loved her, Ira.

She's an incredible woman.

Resourceful, too.

Why'd you cheat on her?

I was stupid.

Didn't know what I had.

She's so warm and compassionate.

And sex.

Sex with Terry was the best.

Even better than you know who?

Oh, yeah.

I was always intimidated by Sybil.

She knew more than I did.

Really.

I always liked that.

Boy, if I could do it all over again,
I'd sure do things different.

Should I teach you that Siamese thing?

Yeah.

It's pretty complicated.

If Terry would just let me talk to her,
I bet I could change her mind.

What was so complicated?

You just had to remember to arch your
feet.

Ira. Sorry.

You know what you have to do if you want
Terry to give you a second chance?

Yeah, I guess I do.

Anyway, I was just wondering, have you
noticed anything different about your

baby?

Like, does she have a penis?

Listen, I'm sorry about your missing
baby, but some of us have dinner

reservations.

Give me those receipts.

Jeff, I told you, I don't have time.

Rachel, sweetheart.

How was the movie?

Oh, that's too bad. You expect more from
Kevin Costner.

The baby's fine. He's sleeping.

I'll tell you what.

Why don't you two go out for a nice,
long, romantic dinner on me?

Okay. I'll talk to you later.

Eat slow.

I lost her baby. I'm going to Grandma
Hell.

That's her.

That's Dominique.

William.

I have no idea how this could have
happened. We feel just awful. Well, I

only hope you'll be a little more
careful in the future.

Wait a minute.

This isn't William.

Of course it's William Sibyl. All babies
look alike.

It's not William. I'm his grandmother. I
know.

Besides, where's his penis?

How could you?

Excuse me. There seems to be a little
mix -up here.

Stephanie, thank God.

Uh -uh. First you show me yours.

Yes, William, did you meet your...

Can I babysit again soon?

I feel like I hardly spent any time with
him at all.

Mother, you think I don't know what you
did?

What? You put him in a Snuggies diaper.
We only use puppies.

Sorry.

Are you telling Rachel about your
exciting day with the baby?

Oh, it wasn't that exciting.

Come on, Mom, I really want to hear.

Really? We just, uh, did a little
shopping.

Remember to stop off at Nordstrom's to
pick up that leather jacket you promised

me?

Yes, but darn the luck.

They're out of stock and not expecting
any more until Christmas.

Gee, I think I heard they were going to
get some by Halloween.

No, they're not expecting any more until
Thanksgiving at the earliest.

Deal. Come on, William.

Let's make sure Grandma hasn't caused a
rash on your little widdle diddle.

Grateful Grandma found his widdle
diddle.

Hello? Jeff?

What is it, Jeff?

Sybil, I've made a decision.

About what?

She wants to know about what?

About Terry.

About Terry?

Is that I? Where are you?

I decided I'm going to go over to her
house and make her listen to... Reason.

Reason.

Jeff, you're drunk.

I am not.

I can smell your breath from here.

Sybil, you know how much I've changed.
Look, you've got to talk to her. She'll

listen to you.

You speak the same language. You know,
women are from Pluto and men are from...

Goofy? Goofy.

Okay, I'll go talk to her. But I can't
promise it'll make any difference.

Thanks. You are the best ex -wife in the
whole world. In the whole universe. In

the whole galaxy.

Bye. The universe is bigger than the
galaxy. Says who?

Goodbye!

So,

who was that?

A couple of guys from the planet Goofy.

I don't want to talk about Jeff.

Look, I know what he did to you. Hell,
he did it to me first. And I was just as

angry and bitter.

Angrier and bitterer.

More bitter.

Why are you defending him? Come on, you
can't blame the man for wanting to know

his own son.

Mmm, that smells great. What is that?

Chocolate chip cherry bombs.

I bake whenever I get upset.

Really? I eat whenever I get upset.

Most people do.

That's why I'm rich.

No, thanks. I'm on a low chocolate chip
cherry bomb diet.

Okay, maybe just one.

You know how Granny Cakes got started?

Jeff forgot to come home for our first
anniversary.

I was so mad, I went in the kitchen and
invented Big Banana Swirl Fudge Cake.

I love Big Banana Swirl Fudge Cake.

We have Jeff to thank for Big Banana
Fudge Swirl Cake?

Yeah.

I should have dumped him then.

Of course, if I had.

I wouldn't have caught him with that
tram driver at the Universal Tour.

And then there'd be no peach cobbler
creamy dreamies.

Oh, I love peach cobbler creamy
dreamies.

It got me through my second divorce.

Well, them and Kahlua.

He broke my heart and turned me into an
angry workaholic.

But damn, the sex was incredible.

Wait a minute. This is Jeff we're
talking about, right?

Mr. Wham Bam Oh, look, the game's on, ma
'am.

Not my Jeff.

I never been with a man who knew so much
about making love.

He did this one thing.

He called the Jeff Robbins Siamese
special.

Harry, I don't know how to tell you
this, but you were in bed with me.

You taught him that stuff?

Mm -hmm.

Have another muffin.

Take the tray.

Thanks!

You know...

Jeff really has changed since you knew
him. He's grown up a lot.

We both know he has a good heart. Oh,
please, Sybil.

You still love him, don't you?

Of course I do.

Why would I be having his baby after all
these years?

That's what I thought.

And while we're on the subject, I've
been wondering, just exactly how did you

manage that?

Well, okay.

See, I got some dry ice.

And I went into the bedroom.

Oh, my God. Wait a minute. You went into
the bedroom and what?

Terry, what do you want?

I want to talk to you.

Listen, I know I wasn't the best husband
in the world. You weren't the best

husband on the block.

No, I know. But Terry, if I could, if I
could turn back the hands

of time.

What?

If I could turn back the hands of time.

Who's that?

My second ex -husband, Ira.

Hi, fib.

Are you expecting anyone else?

Nope, that's it.

Terry, you gotta listen to me.

Quick, while he's climbing up. What did
you do with the dry ice?

What?

I know I was a rotten husband. I know I
hurt you.

But the truth is, I've never loved
anyone more in my whole life.

I'm sorry, Sid, you understand.

No, it's quite all right. Go on.

And I know something else.

You wouldn't be having this baby if you
didn't still feel something for me, too.

Is that all?

No.

I really miss you. Oh, God, me too.

She's having Jeff's baby.

What a wonderful way of saying how much
she loves him.

She's having Jeff's baby. Ira, please
don't sing.

What a wonderful way of saying she's
thinking of him.

I can see it. Her face is glowing. I
said please. She's a woman in love and

loves what it's doing to her.