Original subtitles

Mine? Elizabeth, it's mine.

It's not. Yes, it is. What are you two fighting about? My bubble bath. It's my

bubble bath. Elizabeth, yours is spicy cinnamon. Mine is happy buttercup. Mine

is happy buttercup, Nancy. You're wrong. Jack gave it to me. Roger gave it to

me. Can I just eat something?

Nicholas, would you go find your own fight?

Can I just eat something?

Like I figured.

Nancy, how could you? Don't blame me. She's right. Don't blame her. What? I

it. You used my happy buttercup?

I like bubbles.

What are we going to do with you?

Thank me. I just settled your dumb argument.

When the sunrise smiles on everything around.

It's a portrait of the happiness that we feel and

always will.

We wait enough to fill our lives with love.

And it is enough to fill up.

Nothing. That's good.

And I don't want to talk about it.

Why not?

I'd listen, and I wouldn't tell anyone.

Forget it. You wouldn't understand.

I understand that it's not nothing. It's nothing!

Okay.

Well, maybe nothing wouldn't bother you as much if you spent the night at my

house tonight.

Nah.

We're having a great dinner.

Spaghetti.

Spaghetti?

Are you Italian?

No, are you?

Only when it comes to spaghetti.

All right. See there?

Nothing to it.

Just give it a try.

But, Merle, you don't understand. I flunked gym four semesters in a row.

The only passing grade I ever got was in hot showers.

Oh, come on, Nance. You can do it. It's for a good cause.

Yeah.

Okay.

All right.

You're good with nothing.

Yeah, yeah!

What happened? You sunk it. I did?

But you shouldn't keep your eyes closed.

Merle, I can't help it. I get embarrassed when I see myself missed.

actually did it? Yeah, you actually did.

That's fantastic!

Well, maybe I will play ball after all. Are the uniforms cute?

Hey, Merle, what's going on?

Hi, Nicholas.

Howdy, Jackson.

if you give us 12 points.

Not right now, Nicholas.

I have to coach your sisters.

My sisters?

That's right, Slugger. I'm putting a team together.

Merle's Marauders. We'll play the prelim game at the Children's Hospital

benefit. Can me and Nicholas play on your team?

I'm sorry, Jackson.

It's girls only.

Bradford sisters versus the Cyclone players' wives.

All you mean is just for laughs.

Are you kidding, buddy?

Watch this. Show me stuff.

Two more points?

No, one lost ball.

Lots of luck, Merle.

Tom,

you're going to have to keep Jackson and Nicholas from giggling all night.

Oh, well, I'll allow them one pillow fight, two drinks of water, and then

sleep or get separated.

I really appreciate this.

I'll be back as soon as I can. That's all right. I have something I can work

But it may be very late.

Oh?

Yeah, Professor Hardgrave wants to talk to me after class about my thesis notes.

Problem? I hope not.

Are you sure you don't mind if I miss our usual 10 o 'clock date?

I'll be fine.

You're the most understanding husband in Sacramento.

Oh, yes, and also in the suburbs.

Roseville, Citrus Heights.

You get this?

Where's that?

Not so loud.

Oh, it's all right. Nicholas and Jackson are upstairs. Everyone else is gone.

Oh. I didn't know you were so nervous about it. No, no, no. I'm not nervous.

It's just that I want to keep this project between the two of us until I

back on course.

Wow, Dad, I'm really flattered.

Well, you understand about these artistic endeavors.

It's best not to talk about an audition or get people excited about anything

until it becomes a reality.

Yeah. It does make rejection a lot easier.

I don't want to put it quite that bluntly, but you're right.

No, Dad, I have a feeling that this time you're not going to be rejected.

Keep that feeling and we'll see.

No, no, really, I mean it. The last six or seven times your novel was

rejected... Four or five times.

Oh, right.

I mean, the last four or five times you were working under really difficult

circumstances.

Your family was young then. There was so much confusion in the house. It's no

wonder you didn't do your best work.

But this time everything's going for you.

Concentrate on your goal and go for it.

All right.

Didn't I give you that same speech about acting?

Oh, yeah.

It's a good one. You should listen to it.

I will.

But am I eligible for Merle's Marauders? You're a girl who looks great in gym

trunks, and you're in the Bradford family.

Merle says that's all it takes. Come on, Janet. If they can talk me into it,

they certainly can talk you into it. Okay, why not? It might be fun.

Good. But what about Susan?

Well, Merle says she's ineligible. She's actually won in sixth night's play.

No, but Susan loves basketball, so my sitting on the sidelines will be really

hard for her. But a lot easier on her obstetrician.

I think it's appropriate that we make Susan our team mother.

Hey, you guys have... Fantastic. Counting Joanie, we have a complete

a minute. Counting Susan and her sixth night, we also have a complete rooting

section.

Susan had a good checkup, Tom.

Very good checkup. Oh, really? I'm glad to hear that, Greg.

How's Mary?

Fine. Fine.

Joanie?

Fine. And so are Tommy and Nicholas and David and Elizabeth and Nancy. They're

all doing just great.

Come on, Greg, why don't you admit it? Now, why did you come around here for

first time in three months to find out how healthy the Bradford clan was?

What's on your mind?

Nothing.

Can't I make a simple house call?

No, not without losing your medical license. What's bugging you?

Well, if you insist on prying it out of me, I'll tell you.

It's Daisy.

Oh, what about Daisy?

She's getting her real estate license.

Really? Good for her.

Well, that's easy for you to say. You're not her husband.

Come on, that's a normal human development. After all, her children are

her grandchildren are out of state. She's bored with club work, so she gets

real estate license.

Without any consideration for my predicament.

What predicament?

She'll be working a lot of evenings.

What'll I do?

You mean besides feeling sorry for yourself?

Right. You know, Greg, I had that same sense of desertion when Abby went out

her Ph .D. full time.

But this is a new world we live in. We can't hold our women back.

Why can't we?

Because it's not fair.

And because they wouldn't let us even if we tried.

We have to change with the times.

We have to give our women their freedom.

At the expense of our happiness?

I felt the same way you did until I cured myself.

You cured yourself.

Now I'm really depressed.

Couldn't you spend a couple of thousand on psychiatry? Well, I mean, it took a

little time.

But I finally figured that I had to use that time that Abby was busy to realize

my fondest dream.

So I began to write that novel that I had started in Korea.

Oh, I remember.

You were going to be another Hemingway.

Yes, and I may still be another Hemingway because now that I've started,

resent the time that Abby is away. And you should do the same thing with Daisy.

Just throw yourself into something.

How about the river?

It's very easy, Greg.

Just let Daisy find her thing and you find yours.

It's so simple.

You're going to blow it for me. What?

Going to bed 20 minutes early without being told.

It's what I feel like doing.

But we hardly played any games.

I don't want to get too used to all your games.

What? A guy can't get hooked on that stuff.

He can want to play them all the time.

You can.

Come over whenever you want.

No. This is the last time I'm going to be here.

Was it something I said?

No.

Then how come you're not going to come to my house anymore?

I'll be too busy after school.

Doing what?

Looking for work. What kind of work can you get?

I don't know, but it'll have to be something.

My mom lost her job.

Don't disturb him right now, okay? Why not?

Well, I can't tell you. Well, then I'll have to disturb him. No, not unless it's

really important, okay?

Well, it's not crucial, Joanie, but it's important enough to interrupt his call.

Well, it's not his call, I'm saying. Well, then I can interrupt. No.

Look, it would be a lot easier on Dad if you understood, but please don't let on

that you do, okay?

Dad's writing his novel again.

What are we whispering about?

He doesn't want anybody to... Oh.

He doesn't want anybody to know about it until it's solved.

That's great.

Reed, it is fantastic, Nancy. He's so excited. He's writing again.

And this time, we're all self -sufficient adults. We can take care of

stay out of his way, and let him achieve his dream.

Hello. Hello, hello.

Isn't it a wonderful night?

Boy, you're in a happy mood.

Oh, happy. I'm daddy.

You're not going to believe this. Do you know my professor, Dr. Hargrave? He's

got this very close friend who's in publishing.

Abby, that's terrific.

Dad ought to meet him.

Oh, he will, because he'll be in Sacramento all week.

That's wonderful.

Yeah, well, listen to this. Dr.

Hargrave showed him some of my research material and my thesis outline.

Your material?

Yes.

And he thinks it's going to make a wonderful book.

What is this about a book? Oh, Tom, you're gonna be so happy for me. I've

book. I'm an author.

He says it's natural. The public is very interested in how traditional education

determines sex roles.

Well, any book about sex has to do great.

Oh, no, Nancy, that's just it. See, he promised that he wouldn't exploit this

material. See, he'll use my research to show how schools force boys into one

mold and girls into another with no regard for their real talents and

Sounds fascinating, Abby.

So, you actually do have a contract?

Yeah, he's bringing it tomorrow.

See, apparently what I have to do is write two sample chapters, and then I

to revise the thesis outline into a book outline, and then if they like all

that, then they'll give me six months to write the book.

Oh, boy, you'll be busy.

Yeah, but Dr. Hargrave says I'll be able to get an extension on my thesis

deadline. See, he thinks it's as important as I do that this material

widest possible audience, but I'm going to try to do both.

You will be busy. Do you think we could get free autographed copies when your

book comes out?

Nancy, I'm counting on this family to make sure it's a bestseller.

Abby, this is our bedroom.

I wouldn't think of stealing your study.

Oh, I wasn't about to suggest that. I knew you were, and that's why I'm here.

Well, there's the dining room.

No, I just wouldn't think of A.

clearing my work away every night, or B, submitting a manuscript in Boston

peanut butter.

Well, and how about the screened porch?

It's too close to the television and the stereo. I never get anything done.

The garage?

Never.

Well, I mean, suppose you wake up in the middle of the night and see all this

stuff kind of staring at you.

I won't.

You can spend the whole night there with all this stuff. Wouldn't you feel

uncomfortable?

I think it's cozy.

Cozy? Oh, yes, very cozy.

You, me.

I'm the typewriter.

Tom.

Don't worry about me.

What kind of work does your mom do, Jackson?

She's a boss.

How can a boss lose a job?

Well, she was bossing this big office, and they decided to close it down.

I'm sure she'll find another job soon enough. She says things are slow right

now. Well... I can loan you 84 cents until she gets one. We don't take loans.

Don't get mad, Jackson.

I just like it when you come over.

Yeah. Well, maybe I can come over to your house.

I might not be there.

Once before, my mom lost her job, and we had to move.

What's wrong?

I'm hurrying too fast.

Well, you know how to fix that. Just hurry slower. I can't.

I have to type my thesis. I have to organize my notes. I have to write two

sample chapters, and I have to type two sample chapters, and I have to do all of

this before my deadline.

I need at least six more hands or one good secretary.

Well, have you talked to Jackson's mother?

Is she a secretary?

Well, Jackson said she used to run an office, and she's looking for work.

That's great. Thanks, Tommy. I'll check it out.

You pay?

You haven't paid for my lunch since October 17th, 1965.

Because you haven't given me any good advice since October 17th, 1965.

Oh!

Not until last night.

You know, it's like I went home and I thought about what you said. And the

I thought it through, the more sense it made.

Well, I may have spoken a little hastily. No, you were right on.

I've got to let Daisy do her thing.

And the way for me to handle it is to find my thing. It's that simple.

Maybe it's too simple.

No, the trick is in what you said. I must regard her new career as my

opportunity.

And then it came to me.

Liver.

Liver?

The most underrated organ in the human body.

I see.

But it won't be after I'm through. I'm going to know more about the human liver

than any man in this country. I'm going to read books. I'm going to take

courses. I'm going to do research.

And in a hundred years from now, when men think of liver, they're going to

of Greg Maxwell.

Well, if that's what you want.

It's exactly what I want. But you see, I never had the chance to try, and now

that I do, I feel like a kid again.

Can I give you another piece of advice?

Please. Just pray that she doesn't quit real estate and become a doctor.

We'll start with some layups.

Who's first?

Janet. Mary.

What's a layup? I don't know what a layup is. Well, I know, but if Merle

me asking, then I won't have to be first.

I'll go first.

You? Yeah.

Volunteering is the only part in basketball I'm good at.

Ball, please, Merle.

Uh, you're wearing gloves.

I know.

But you don't play basketball with gloves on.

Well, Merle, if you think I'm going to break my fingernails, you can forget it.

It took a long time to grow these babies.

Okay.

Now, do I dribble?

On the quarter off.

Come on, Nancy. Okay, watch this, guys. You just watch this.

Well, how'd I do?

Let's just say we got a great chance of making the other team very

overconfident. We do?

Oh, yeah.

Terrific. Exactly.

Okay, Joan.

Let's see you do something with it.

how much this is going to help me.

Oh, it's perfect for me, too.

I have an application in at Senator Avery's office, but the position won't

open for several weeks.

Oh, this will work out great for you, then, because you won't have to worry

about Jackson after school.

Nicholas will love having him here, and so will we.

That will be awfully nice, Mrs. Bradford.

Abby.

Thank you, Abby.

And I'm Lillian.

Lillian. So when can you start?

Tomorrow morning.

That's perfect. Great.

Okay.

Come on. Don't throw the ball.

Come on. Come on. Just throw it.

Throw it. Throw it. That's it. That's it. Harder.

Keep those eyes open.

Look one place. Throw it another.

Don't you? Stay in there. Get the ball.

Hustle!

Merle, what's with the Gestapo bits? Yeah, come on, Merle. You said this was

supposed to be fun.

Fun is winning.

25 laps.

Everybody.

What?

And Jackson can play here every day and sleep over sometimes.

That's right, Nicholas.

Thanks, Abby.

No, Tom, it was really his idea.

Don't mention it, sport. I enjoy sleeping out on the screen porch every

a while. Oh, yeah, because Dad can't hear what time you come in.

No, because I'm such an altruist. Likes to hide what time he comes in.

I'd like to change the subject.

I'd like to propose a toast to Abby Bradford and her new book.

Thanks. Yeah, all right, I'll drink to that.

Did you have to rub it in like that?

I was rubbing it in.

I think Abby did a wonderful thing.

We should hire a band and throw her a bash.

Oh, that's great.

That's really what Dad needs.

This has nothing to do with Dad.

This has everything to do with Dad, Mary.

He has dreamed about selling his book for 25 years.

He's written a dozen versions of it. He's gone without sleep, without

I mean, he has struggled for this.

Abby hasn't exactly been lolling around in a hammock eating bonbons. I know, but

she didn't even try to write a book, and then she sells one.

I mean, it's just not fair at all.

Who said it was supposed to be?

If you were Dad, wouldn't you feel cheated?

Is Abby here?

I think she's upstairs, Nicholas. Why?

There's a Mr. Ellis here.

Ellis? That's what it says on the card he gave me.

Boy, I sure wish I had a card. It makes you feel cheap when you don't have one

to give back.

This guy's from Abby's Publishing.

I know. I can read. I'll get Abby. No, no, no, Nicholas.

Listen, I'll get her, okay? I'm going upstairs anyway. Wait a second, Johnny.

We're not done. Yeah, I'll be right back.

Well, don't just stand there. Dry something.

I am dry.

Nicholas, it's fun to help.

No, it isn't.

You'll love it, Mr. Ellis. I know you will.

Dad is really a genius.

I'm sure he is, Miss Bradford, but I'm not really interested in any new

at the moment.

Oh, but you can't let this one go by, Mr. Ellis.

I mean, there are lots of publishers interested in this.

And, uh, think of the publicity when you publish Abby's book and Dad's book.

What's it about?

Oh, it is a wonderful novel, Mr. Ellis. To me, it has a brilliant blend of

Tolstoy and Norman Mailer.

Would take some brilliance.

And the setting?

The Korean War.

I'm sorry, Miss Bradford, but we couldn't possibly consider it.

How can you possibly say that without even reading it?

Every definitive novel of the Korean War was written 20 years ago.

There's just no market for anything so tired, so out of date.

Why, this is really good.

Perhaps, but it's not something we, or most likely anyone else, would want to

publish.

Elizabeth, would you bring me a cup of coffee as long as you're up? Who's up?

I thought you were getting up.

No, no, that was just a muscle spasm.

Well, at least your muscle can still spasm.

I spent the whole night dreaming I was running laps.

And each time I'd reach number 25, this ogre would say, it was only 24.

Did this ogre look like Merle?

No, he had big green tusks.

Blind expression.

As long as you're up there.

Would you get us a cup of coffee?

Coffee? Who's drinking coffee?

You will if you bring it, Doctor.

No way.

It's not on your training diet.

What training diet?

Since you're the medical expert, I'm putting you in charge, Mary. All you

do is follow the menu. It was developed by the team doctor for the cyclones.

Well, there are more calories in this first breakfast than I eat all week.

Calories? You want us to eat calories?

And vitamins.

And minerals.

I want to get all you marauders in the best possible shape for the big game.

Just hold on. I have worked hard to get in my present shape, and I'm not going

to ruin it with calories.

Right, Merle. We're not going to eat like baseball players.

You'll be sorry when you poop out in practice.

There's another way to prevent that, medically speaking.

What?

Don't practice.

Are you kidding? That's sacrilege.

I'd expect you all in the gym at 12 .05.

Now, keep writing.

Ah, good morning, Mrs. Andrews. Come in, come in.

Good morning, Mr. Bradford. Thank you.

Well, this must be the big brother that Jackson is always bragging about. That's

right. You haven't met.

Mr. Bradford, this is my son, Darren. Darren, this is Nicholas's father.

Oh, how do you do, Darren?

Just fine, Mr. Bradford. How are you? Good, real good. Here, let me take that.

Don't forget now.

Jackson and I will be expecting you right at six. Got it.

Don't stop to shoot baskets and forget about it. Right, and drive carefully,

son. Now you've got it.

Okay.

You have two fine boys, Mrs. Andrews. You must be very proud.

Well, thank you, Mr. Bradford. I consider that a compliment from an

I'm going to enjoy your family.

Oh, we're just so happy that you can be here with us. I'm just proud I'm able to

help Mrs. Bradford get her book done.

There's nothing greater than a book. A book can go on, long after our own lives

are totally forgotten.

I know.

How I envy you.

Envy me?

Well, yes.

You're married to an author.

How wonderful you must feel.

You wouldn't believe just how wonderful.

Here I am.

Isn't it great? Now you can come over to my house every day and play.

Yeah, but don't count on being fun.

Why not?

My mom bosses the place. She really bosses it. She does?

Yeah. She doesn't let people get away with anything.

Not your parents, not your sisters, not Tommy, or anyone.

I didn't know that.

Well, just keep your eyes open.

She's going to show you graphics up.

Working hard, I see.

Oh, morning, Elliot.

Well, aren't you going to tell me, Tom?

Tell you what?

Come on, now.

Don't be so coy. It's wonderful news.

What is?

About Abby, about her writing a book.

Oh, you were going to slip it into the conversation modestly, right?

So as you could top me whenever I brag about Randy Three.

Yeah, something like that.

Well, you have forgotten how eager the book boys can be about publicity.

I received a visit this morning from a man named Mr.

Ellis. He brought me a press release, and he's put a great deal of pressure on

us to do a feature story on Sacramento's newest author.

Oh, really?

We might have to change your byline to Mr.

Abby Bradford.

Why don't we make it Mr. Dr.

Abby Bradford? She'll be getting her Ph .D.

That's right. I forgot about that.

Makes us look like pikers, doesn't it?

Like this.

Well, we'll just have to write books ourselves.

After all, wives do it. Shouldn't be that hard.

It's hard, Elliot.

I suppose it's harder than writing an editorial or a column.

Not today. Today, column writing is impossible.

Don't tell me we're having another one of your little writer's blocks.

Not little.

May I make a suggestion?

Why don't you write about being married to a famous author?

I've considered that.

There are no laughs.

Elizabeth, you gotta arc the ball when you shoot it.

Oh, come on. Please, bend your knees, Mary. Bend your knees.

You're shooting off the palm of your hand. Shoot off your fingertips. Hi,

Hi, Nance. Hi, Nance.

You're late.

I'm sorry.

I had to fit my lunch hour around my bosses.

Well, that's great. We only have the court for another 40 minutes.

Uh, I can't stay that long, Merle. I have a lecture.

Yeah, and I have a tennis date with Jack.

You'd be better off forgetting the tennis and concentrate on basketball.

Yeah, well, what I'm concentrating on is Jack.

I don't understand this team.

Now, what's keeping Janet?

What's keeping Joanie? Look, maybe Janet had an important case. Maybe Joanie's

covering a big story.

Look, Merle, I know that they're not as important to you as basketball, but

those are their jobs. I just don't want you making fools of yourselves on game

night.

Hey, Merle, it's no big deal.

Tell that to Bingo's team.

Oh, your old rival Bingo is coaching the Cyclone Wives?

Yeah. And he's got them practicing four hours a day.

I think we should do the same.

Impossible.

Ridiculous. Well, come on. If I can give my time to coach you, you can make the

time to be here.

You're wrong, though.

What?

Look, let's face it.

You're just too much of a gung -ho jock for the crew of klutzes.

You expect too much, and you take it too seriously.

Remember, this is for charity.

So don't tell me you're going to quit on me.

No, Merle, we're not going to quit.

We'll play.

But we're going to coach ourselves.

That's crazy.

It may be crazy, Merle, but at least it won't be the Marine Corps.

Look, we love you, Merle.

And we don't want to wind up hating each other.

Right, team?

Right, Merle.

Look, we just want to be friends.

We're firing you as coach, but...

We're hiring you back as brother -in -law.

Merle, they can't do that to you.

Hold on, honey.

They had a point.

It's my business.

I'm used to tough coaching, but they're girls. Oh, now, wait a minute. That's no

excuse. When I was on the gymnastics team, we trained as hard as the football

players did.

Yeah, but you wanted to. Your sisters don't. Oh, boy, I just wish I could get

out there and suit up. I'd show them that you're right and they're wrong.

Forget it, honey.

It's not worth splitting a family over. Any family that fires my husband

deserves to be split.

Take it easy.

You'll upset the baby. Hey, I've got news for you. This baby's kicking harder

about this than I am.

You hungry?

Yeah. Me too.

We'll ask my mom if we can have something.

Okay. She might say no.

Really? Yeah, so I'll ask her. Good idea.

Hi, Nicholas.

How was school?

School was okay.

A little long after lunch.

Yeah. Mom, we're hungry.

What else is new?

Could we have something from the refrigerator?

Well, what's the rule on that, Nicholas?

Huh?

I should ask Abby about it, but I hate to disturb her when she's working so

hard. What about it, Nicholas?

What about what?

Is it all right for you to have a snack?

Why are you asking him?

It's his house, Jackson.

But you're the boss of it.

Whatever gave you that idea? I work for Mrs. Bradford.

No!

It's true, Jackson.

You mean Nicholas' mom can tell you what to do?

Of course.

Come on, Jackson. Let's go play.

I don't want to play.

I don't even want to stay here.

Hold it, one at a time, please. Right, me first.

No, Dad, we've got to find Jackson first.

You and Dad can look for Jackson while the rest of this family is apologizing

Merle. Susan, we did that when we fired him. Yeah, so we're even.

Please,

Karen, to hold it. Now, what is this about Jackson? Where is Mrs.

Andrews? She's out looking for him, Dad. We've got to help.

I don't understand any of this. I mean, what is going on? Where is Abby?

She's upstairs, Dad. But you can't disturb her.

Who says?

Abby even has a secretary now, so why do I get stuck when things fall apart?

Abby? What is it, Tom?

There's no one minding the store.

Tom, I don't have time for riddles.

All I ask is that you help out a little.

Please just wait. I'm right in the middle of a thought.

Well, this family is in the middle of chaos.

Abby, it's not working.

What is not working? This book disrupting our lives.

Yours, maybe, but not mine.

All right, mine.

It's disrupting mine.

Tom, I'm sorry you can't handle it, but would you just leave me alone? Because I

have a deadline.

I never thought that Abby and I would get involved in a triangle.

Is it really a triangle, Dad?

Sure it is.

I'm competing with that book.

Isn't there another angle in the geometry?

What about your book?

What book?

Come on, Dad.

By the time Joanie had sworn us all to secrecy, everybody knew about it except

for Abby.

Oh, wonderful.

The novel is over.

Obviously, I was just fooling myself.

I don't think it is over. Oh, yeah.

It's out of the bottom drawer and back down in the basement.

I think you resent the fact that Abby made it instead of you.

No, I don't resent it.

I mean, look, how would you feel if all of a sudden Janet became the biggest

contractor in Sacramento and you were going bankrupt?

No, thanks.

We have enough trouble handling our careers as it is. That's exactly what

saying. Wasn't easy for me to let Abby leave the house and go back to school.

Your mother never would have done that.

No, her family definitely came first.

And her husband.

That's true, her husband.

Well, face it, Dad, Abby has her own way of going, and you've encouraged it.

Yeah, sure I have, but I didn't think it would lead to this.

You make it sound like you and Abby are competing in some kind of contest, and

you think you lost.

That's right.

That is how I feel.

Mrs. Andrews, boy, am I glad to see you. Did you find Jackson?

Yes, Nicholas. Darren found him. Great.

He's okay.

As good as can be better.

Well, is he coming over?

I don't think so, Nicholas.

Why? Doesn't he like us?

It's not you, Nicholas.

We'll talk about it. I'd like to see Abby. She and Joanie are upstairs, but

said not to disturb them.

How about your father?

He went out.

Well, in that case, I'll just keep myself busy till Abby's free.

Can I ask you a question?

Of course.

Well, are you the boss, or do you just work here?

Abby and I have a business arrangement, Nicholas.

It helps me, and I do my best to help her.

Do you understand?

Sort of.

Well, sort of is a lot better than Jackson understands it.

Oh.

And Channing rejected Tom's manuscript?

I know I shouldn't have shown it to him, Abby, but I believed in it so much. I

thought it was going to make everything perfect for you and Dad.

And Tom knows?

Mm -hmm.

Well, I can see why he's so upset.

Oh, I knew he'd understand.

There's nothing I can do about it.

Abby, Tom's book is Tom's book.

My book is my book, and they don't have anything to do with each other. No, no,

they have everything to do with each other, as long as it's driving you two

apart. Tom's ego is driving us apart.

Well, then do something about it. What?

Give up the contract? Give up my chance to help change the educational system

just so Tom won't feel threatened?

No, I'm not suggesting that.

Just... just consider Dad's feelings, that's all.

I have considered his feelings, and I think they're destructive.

Joanie, are women always supposed to hold back so that the proud male can

center stage?

Abby, you know that I don't want that either.

Well, then be patient.

Your father adjusted to my going back to school, and he'll adjust to this.

This is totally different. How is it different?

Well, how would you feel if Dad was suddenly granted a Ph .D. in education

yours was turned down?

I think she's got as much ego involved in this as Dad.

Why not?

Nobody's medically proven that the ego is exclusively male.

I know, but is that what equality's all about?

Equal egos?

Well, maybe David can help your father.

David? That's right. He's planning to spend the whole day with your father.

David? That's like sending Muhammad Ali to explain humility to Howard Cosell.

I really hate to lose you, Lillian.

And I'd hate to have Jackson lose Nicholas as a friend.

I guess it's my fault.

Your fault? Why?

I wanted both my sons to be proud, Abby.

I always told them that we are strong people, that they weren't meant to

that they were meant to lead.

From what I've seen of Jackson, that's true.

It's not true yet.

I guess I wanted so much to spare him from the harder parts of living that I

taught him too much pride.

It's any consolation there's a lot of that going around these days.

You know, you're a great sounding board, David.

Thanks. No, really, you have no idea how gratifying it is to have somebody to

talk to like this.

You did the same for me for a lot of years.

You were there when I needed you. You listened.

Yeah, but right now I need more than listening.

What do you mean?

Uh, I need advice.

You want advice from me? You're gonna get thrown out of the father's union.

Oh, no, I know it's a drastic reversal of form in our relationship, but...

you have the experience, and I haven't. With what?

With all this fuzziness.

Fuzziness? Yeah.

In my day, when men were men and women were women, you knew exactly where you

stood.

Wasn't that boring?

No. On the contrary, it was rather reassuring.

There's no competition between the sexes.

If you saw somebody in jeans, you felt safe swearing. Or if you saw somebody

with long hair, you felt safe saying, Ma 'am, dinner was at 6 o 'clock sharp.

And they did the dishes.

Dad, let's forget about golf and go find a time machine, huh?

No, no, I'm serious, son.

I mean, how do you and Janet do it? I know you almost lost each other once

your two careers, but now you seem very happy with each other. We are.

Well, how do you do it?

Well, I guess it started happening when I...

remembered what questions to ask.

About what?

About everything.

If there's a problem with Janet's work or something goes wrong with the

apartment, I ask myself, now, what's more important, me or us?

And when the answer's me, there's no us.

So the answer can't be me.

Thanks, son.

Don't mention it, Dad. That's what I'm here for.

Okay, Elizabeth, you throw to Janet, then she'll throw to me, and I'll shoot.

No, you'll miss. I'll throw to you, and you throw to Janet.

Janet, this time don't dribble double, okay?

It's double dribble. Well, whatever. Just don't do it. Hold it.

This is a basketball team, not a debating society.

It's not a basketball team. We have five coaches who can't decide on anything.

You guys, maybe we should ask Merle to come back.

That would be crawling.

Well, maybe we should just forfeit the game. That'd be chicken.

Look, if we don't shape her pretty quick, we're going to look awfully

ridiculous. Girl.

Oh, hi, Lily. What's up?

Mind if I make a little suggestion?

Abby!

Dad, she went out.

Oh, shucks. I should have called from the club. Did she say where she was

Something about a meeting.

Did she say where?

Nope. Did she leave a number?

Uh -uh. Boy, you really want to see her. I sure do.

Will she be back soon?

Why wouldn't she?

Good point here.

Thank you.

But I'm afraid it isn't expressed very clearly.

I'm sorry.

You know, I hate to say this, but you seem to bury your most exciting ideas

beneath the jargon of academia.

Really? It almost seems as if this were your thesis.

I didn't intend that.

Well, it's easy to get conditioned to impressing your fellow professors.

Frankly, we'd rather impress the book -buying public.

So what happens now?

Don't get depressed.

It's for occasions like this they invented rewrites.

Speaking of words, that one sounds pretty terrifying.

Abby, please, this is not rejection.

Well, compared to the cheers I was expecting, it's pretty close.

Johnny!

Oh, shucks.

You're getting the hang of it. Thanks.

But I don't think we'll be taking on the Lakers for a week or so.

The Lakers? Now, there's a basketball team. Yeah, and so are we. Yeah, right.

But you'll be a lot closer to one once I show you how you should line up for

your free throws.

Yeah, I'll line up for anybody. Let's do it.

Darren may need some help. Yeah,

and if you help him, can I help you?

Yeah, if Darren says it's okay.

Well, he's a coach.

Right. Your sisters are kind of looking for him.

Well, I guess.

If you want to put it that way.

Well, that's how it is.

Is it that big a deal?

Not really.

I'm glad you came back.

Me too.

Come down the middle. I want you two to be on the outside.

Tom. Ab.

I've been looking for you.

I've been looking for you.

I wanted to apologize.

No, I want to apologize.

I guess I was pretty insufferable. Well, I know that I was very childish.

I didn't know you were writing your book again.

What difference does it make?

One famous author in the family is enough.

I'm not a famous author.

But you will be.

And I can accept that.

No, I have a problem.

I can't write.

Who says that?

Channing Ellis.

What does he know? He rejected my novel.

No, Tom, it's true. He says I don't know how to write for the public.

And I have to admit, he seems pretty convincing.

So? So I was thinking while I was driving home.

You could help me.

Me?

You're the professional writer.

We could do the book together, my material and your words.

Oh, but you saw the way I acted around here. What do I know about modern sex

roles?

I think you're becoming an expert.

Tom, I really need you.

Of course, it means that we'd have to spend a lot more time together.

Going through my research, discussing, editing.

Now, wait a minute. Let me get this straight.

Are you suggesting collaboration?

On anything you have in mind.

Do I get a byline?

And fringe benefits.

Oh, Joanie, you were great.

I'm sorry I didn't mean to do that. But you were great. Really, I was proud.

Nicholas, take good care of her. She did a wonderful job. Here's the nurse. Oh,

Mary.

You were fine. Just fine.

Yes, yeah.

Oh, Janet, I was proud.

Sure. Yes, of course. Right over there.

Elizabeth, you gave it all you had.

I know, but will I ever get it back? Yes, yes, yes. You'll recover.

Here she is, Nancy.

That was some basketball. It was great.

It wasn't way past you. It was unreal.

It was like this. We were 40 feet down the court, okay? Three seconds

left in the game. Two seconds.

It didn't go quite that far, Jackson, but it was a terrific shot.

Classic.

Unforgettable.

Too bad it was the only basket we made.