Original subtitles

Good morning, Ross.

Good morning, Lawrence.

Smiles, everyone, smiles.

Is that the young lady you were telling me about, Mr. Rock? Yes, Lawrence.

That is Miss Fancy Somerfield, who once lived in Sylvan House.

That would be the magnificent chateau on the north shore, right? Yes, Lawrence.

Her father and I were very close friends.

When he passed away, the chateau was sold, and Miss Somerfield went to the

mainland to live with relatives. She was in her early teens then.

And now she's come back perfectly. How charming.

And now romantic.

I mean, Summerfield's fantasy is to spend a perfect weekend with the man of

dreams, a man who will truly love her.

I shouldn't think a young lady of her obvious charm would have any trouble in

that regard, sir.

True, but as you well know, Lawrence, sometimes the obvious can be most

deceiving.

The woman's fourth exposition you're hosting this weekend is certainly

attracting all the types, isn't it, sir?

Oh, if you mean that dashing young man, Mr. Baker? Yes, Lawrence. He considers

himself to be quite a ladies' man.

From the look of his friends, I shouldn't think he harbors the same

Joe Manning. Yes, a different type altogether.

Shy, inhibited.

When it comes to women, he totally lacks Mr. Baker's competence.

I have a sneaking suspicion he expects you to restore his competence.

Your suspicion is well -founded.

Mr. Manning's fantasy is to date for the first time in his life.

An exceedingly beautiful woman.

A ten, as he terms it. How prosaic. The man has seen too many movies.

Or one particular movie too many times.

My dear guests, I am Mr. Rourke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

Sir Roy, I can't tell you how great it is to be back on Fantasy Island.

Won't you do something very special for me?

You know I'd be delighted.

Take me to see the old chateau.

The current owner is here for the Fantasy Island Wine Tasting Festival,

sure he wouldn't object, but... But what's the problem?

Has he painted the house purple or what?

Oh, no, no, no, nothing like that. It's just that the owner, Mr. John McDowell,

Has a rather unsavory reputation. Is the name familiar to you?

McDowell? Yes.

No.

There's no rush.

We can see it tomorrow.

Tomorrow may be a busy day.

I'll take you in, say, 30 minutes.

All right.

But what about my fantasy?

What do I have to do?

Legend says that...

If this gold coin is dropped into a fountain, the person who drops it will

only have the object of their love revealed to them, but will also have

most secret wish come true.

I'll have my love and most secret wish? Yes.

I'll settle for your guarantee on that.

You have it, of course.

I've made my wish.

You're the man I want.

You always have been.

I want you to love me.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Forget I said that.

Look, after I change my clothes, why don't you come pick me up for that visit

the chateau?

Surely you haven't found getting a date with a woman all that difficult, have

you? With dogs, I get dates all the time.

Bowels, yeah.

But I never get a date with the kind of girl I dream about, you know?

Never a ten.

Well, personally, I am not comfortable with rating women by numbers. It seems

so, I don't know, so superficial.

Yeah, I'm coming out like some hayseed in the heat, right?

But I'll tell you, boy, just once...

I'd like to make out with a beautiful chick to prove to Vinnie that I can do

You know, just once.

Vinnie? Oh, you mean your friend, Mr. Baker?

Yes. Would you get me some coffee?

Oh, yeah.

You are jealous of Mr.

Baker? Oh, everybody's jealous of Vinnie. The guy's dynamite.

If you count up all the beautiful scalps he's taken, he'd be right up there with

Geronimo. I see. And now you want to prove to Mr.

Baker that you are quite capable of getting a beautiful scalp?

As you put it, of your own, huh?

That's right, Mr. Rourke. But I'm not going to score any points on Vinnie if

found out it was handed to me in a fantasy.

So we got to do this on the QT, okay?

Just keep it between you and me in the lamppost?

Not to worry, Mr. Manning.

All guests' fantasies are held in the strictest confidence.

Green? Oh, please.

Well, that's good. Now, I don't know how you're going to go about doing this,

but I thought it would help if I would give you this list of types.

See, I'm not particular.

I go for blondes, brunettes, redheads, doesn't matter. As long as she looks

Bo Derek.

Hey, it's not... Unfortunately for you, no. The lady's already married to Mr.

Derek. Well, then, uh, then who?

These two passes will allow you and your friend to go backstage at the women's

sports exposition.

It's quite possible you may find the woman you're looking for there.

You mean you don't already have her picked out?

Mr. Manning, as they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I think it's best if you pick out your own ten.

What would

you give her, Joe?

Anything she wanted. No, no. I mean on a scale of one to ten.

An eight? Huh?

I don't know. It takes a guy of your experience to know the difference

an eight and a ten.

But if you ask me, I'd give her a twenty.

Well, as the fox said, now that we've found the hen house, all we've got to do

is find a way in.

Well, why don't we just walk in?

Don't you see the guard?

It's restricted.

And I don't think he'd believe my talent scout routine.

Ah. No need to lie when you know the right people.

A VIP pass?

Fantastic.

I think we should have a talk

first.

Oh, fancy, fancy.

Many years ago, we had a very special relationship, you and I.

But you were just a little girl then, with a little girl's heart. And now I'm

woman, with a woman's heart, right? Yes.

But surely you're aware that the kind of love you really want isn't found in...

in passion.

Are you saying you don't feel anything when I kiss you like that?

No, I can't say that.

No.

What I could say is that you must leave Fantasy Island on the next plane.

Tonight.

Well, the bottom line is that you made me a promise, remember?

Now, why don't you just take me to the chateau like we planned?

Yes.

Perhaps that's a good idea.

Perhaps we should play the fantasy out.

Excuse me, are you sure you haven't gotten a message from me from a Vinnie

Baker? You just asked me that two minutes ago.

Oh. Got any more of these peanuts?

Yeah.

I'm such a klutz. I can't believe I did that. That's all right. It's okay. I

just hope the beer doesn't stain my shirt. No, I don't think it will. Here,

me help you get it off. It's all right. I'll get it. I'll let you do it myself,

okay? I'm so stupid. I don't believe I did that. I will do this. I'm sorry.

Listen, turn the motor off, okay? You don't have to be so upset about it.

Look, if I want to be upset, I'll be upset.

You are really uptight, aren't you?

You know, I'm always uptight when I'm good up.

That's too bad.

I'm Paula Santino.

Joe Manning.

Nice to... Nice to meet you, Paula. Oh, it's nice to meet you.

Are you here for the sports expo?

Sort of.

Are you?

Mm -hmm.

Yes, I work on the ski demonstrator.

No kidding.

You one of those girls in the bikinis who skis on the treadmill? That's you?

Oh, no, no. I'm just a salesperson.

No, if they put me in a bikini, they'd have to sell blindfolds.

Come on, don't put yourself down.

You're a very, um... Well, you're not half bad.

Well, thank you.

I think.

Hey, Joe!

Huh?

Ha -ha!

Thought I forgot about you, huh?

Monique, this is Joseph, the automotive expert I've been telling you about.

Joseph. Monique.

Automotive expert, huh?

You design cars, that sort of thing?

No, I'm a mechanic.

You mean grease?

And monkey wrenches?

I'll see you around, Joe.

Huh? Oh, okay.

Automotive expert.

Yes, and this is Angelica. She is the former Miss Western Canada.

I'm still Miss Western Canada till April.

for life, if you ask me.

Well, Angelica here promised to tell me about the mating habits of the great

northern caribou, so why don't we leave you and Monique here to get better

acquainted? Ciao.

How

about

a beer?

Hey, look,

I just remembered something I have to do, so... Oh.

I understand.

Absolutely nothing personal or anything. I'm sure you're probably a really nice

guy and everything.

You're really sweet. Thanks.

Yeah. I feel bad.

I really do. Okay.

Bye. Bye.

Nothing's changed.

Nothing at all. I'm very happy you're pleased.

My father coming out that door to say hello.

The little girl with the ponytail peeking out from behind.

How beautiful everything is.

I feel like we belong here together, you know?

Welcome home, Patsy.

Look.

What do I owe this dubious honor?

Miss Somerfield's father used to own the Chateau.

With your permission, of course, she'd like to see her childhood home again.

John McDowell, Miss Fancy Somerfield.

We've met before, haven't we?

Have we?

Somewhere on the Riviera.

Monaco, maybe?

I'm afraid not. I've never been to Monaco.

Sensational spot, Monica.

That's where I met Giselle.

Oh, sorry.

Giselle. This is Miss Giselle Corday.

Miss Corday?

I've heard a lot about you, Mr. Roark. Oh, I can well imagine.

Why don't you and Giselle get better acquainted, Roark? I'll take Miss

Summerfield on a personally guided tour of the old homestead.

Thank you, but I would like a word with you, if you don't mind. I'm sure Miss

Corday won't mind showing fancy around.

Come on, Sherry. As long as we end up at the bar.

A very nice -looking little lady, Roark.

Very...

Appetizing. Mr. McDowell, fancy Summerfield is definitely off -limits to

Well, Rorke, do I detect a personal interest?

A very personal interest, yes.

Fair enough.

But don't push it too far, pal. No woman is off -limits if she doesn't want to

be.

I've always had this habit. Whenever I'm feeling really down about myself, I eat

a lot of peanuts.

Yeah? Mm -hmm.

Me too.

Crazy, huh? Yeah.

What happened? Your party never showed up?

No, I guess he found greener pastures.

There's no way I can compete with all these gorgeous girls here for the expo.

There you go, putting yourself down again.

You're a good -looking girl, Paula.

Well, before I wasn't half bad. Now I'm good looking.

That's improvement.

I'm just trying to be nice. You don't have to be sarcastic. Who's sarcastic?

Well, you are. You want witnesses?

You know, you really make it tough for a girl, especially when she's trying to

make a pass at you.

A pass?

At me?

I've got to do something.

I gave up standing on ceremony when I looked in the mirror.

How about that?

A girl makes a pass at me and I still blow it.

Even on Fantasy Island, I gotta be the only guy that's not gonna make out.

What's so funny?

Your tale of woe.

It's breaking my heart.

Come on.

Tell me something.

What? You really making a pass?

I thought we'd gone beyond that already.

Oh, yeah.

Mr. Experience, right?

Yeah, I know. I saw what happened with Monique.

Oh, it's just that...

I like to lead when I'm dancing.

Look, this isn't a piece of cake for me either.

And you could really help by saying something sweet.

Oh, I'm sorry. Okay.

It's really okay for you to come on to me.

Well, that's not what I mean.

Look, I am trying to talk myself into something here, and frankly, you're not

helping very much.

What have I done now?

Well, it's what you haven't done.

Look, I agree with you. I want you to make me feel like I'm the girl and

the boy.

Know what I mean?

You mean I have to ask straight out?

Well, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do.

Paula, it's just that I've never been able to say these kind of things before.

What kind of things?

Romantic things.

You know, stuff like that.

See, if the girl doesn't laugh at me for trying, I'll end up laughing at myself.

Oh, you're talking about rejection.

Well, that's not the case here.

I mean, I'm practically climbing all over you.

Go on, huh?

Take a shot.

Say something romantic.

Romantic?

Okay.

All right, here goes.

Paula?

Well, that's close enough.

Come on, let's go.

Thanks for the tour, Giselle.

It was great.

Did you forget about me?

That wouldn't be easy to do.

Enjoying yourself?

Yes, of course.

Inside the house, nothing looks the same.

But out here with you, it's like it always was.

Only better.

You won't really send me away, will you?

I'm sorry, but we can't play your little game anymore, Fancy.

Game?

I've played games all my life.

And mostly with men.

And with me, the loser.

Did you know I was married when I was 17?

Fancy, there is no need to tell me this. I want to.

I want you to know who I really am. So you'll understand.

The boy I married was as much a child as me.

After that, men.

And lots of them. Fancy, please. I've messed up myself pretty badly.

I guess I'm still messed up.

That's why I want a chance to do things differently, to make a new life, to make

a new start.

You can do that for me. I can help you, Fancy, and I will, but not in the way

you want.

I need you, Rourke.

I need someone like you who'll make me feel safe, make me feel protected,

and make me feel loved.

No. So you're too good for me, right?

Oh, no.

Well, I won't make it easy for you.

I'm not leaving here. I'm staying.

And I'll take my damn fantasy where I can find it.

You know, it's crazy, but I could eat hubcaps afterwards

and it would taste just as great.

You're laughing again.

Oh, am I?

Well, I guess if I didn't laugh, I'd cry.

Cry? What's the matter?

Did I do something wrong?

Oh, no, no, no, no. It's just that I'm so happy.

You cry when you're happy?

Sometimes. Don't you?

I guess I've never been that happy.

Oh.

Until now.

You have a little red on your lip.

You don't really have

to go back to work at that ski demonstrator, do you?

Well, until five o 'clock.

Tell me you can't wait until five o 'clock.

I can't wait until five.

Tell me you'll die a little every minute until five.

Every minute.

Are you a good liar, Joe?

I'm a very bad liar, Paula.

Oh, good.

Well, then I guess you'll be a death's door by five o 'clock.

Don't worry.

I'll be there to save you.

Hey,

Joey!

What happened to Monique?

Paula Santino, this is my friend, Vinnie Baker.

I'll see you later, Joe.

Oh, as for Monique, I think she fell into a snake pit.

What's the matter with you, Vin?

Asking about another woman?

Embarrassing her like that?

Pardon me for being cruel to animals.

Lay off, will you? She's okay.

She's a dog, Joe.

Bastard hound. Look, I don't see it that way, all right?

As a matter of fact, we hit it off pretty good, you know what I mean?

You blew a chance with Monique for that?

Come on, Vinnie, I never had a chance with Monique.

You know, Paula's a really nice girl.

Wait till the guys in the neighborhood hear this.

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Listen, the guys in the neighborhood give me enough heat as it is. I don't

any more. Well, then stop being a nerd.

Look, this is our last chance.

What do you say we go out, bag ourselves a couple of tens? It'll make history.

What do you say?

What do I do about Paula?

I mean, poor girl's always being stood up. I don't believe this.

Well, just because you want to help out a loser doesn't mean you have to end up

a loser again, too.

But you... Oh.

Charity.

There was this lost soul. She needed some human kindness. You gave it to her.

Charity.

Look, bottom line, Jim.

Is she somebody you want to parade around in front of the guys on Saturday

night? Huh?

Huh?

What do you say?

Huh?

Well, settle.

You wait here, pal. I'm going to call Angelica, and she is going to fix you up

with somebody even better than Monique.

My dear friends, let us begin our wine -tasting festival.

It takes a full decade...

for the soil and the vine to fully know each other so they can work together in

harmony. And this, my friends, is what gives each wine its own distinctive

character.

And now a most distinguished Gamay Beaujolais from your host winery,

Sylvan House.

of how you preferred my company to Rourke's. I had you pegged, Angel.

What's that supposed to mean?

Monaco.

You pretended you didn't remember this morning, but I did.

Remember what?

I don't know what you're talking about.

That wild party at the villa rented by some fat little director where all the

guests had to do to enjoy the girl of their choice was catch her.

You must have really been out of shape because... Stop it!

All right.

Who am I to judge?

I was doing my own thing, remember?

I don't want to remember.

Don't worry, I'm not going to blow the whistle on you.

But be polite.

You need me for the same reason that I need you.

And what's that?

My feeling is that Rourke turned you down cold, right?

Let's just say that I enjoy taking things that people tell me not to.

But together, we can both win.

And Rourke loses.

A deal?

Yeah, why not?

Fancy.

I want you to leave with me, please.

Now. Take it easy, Rourke. Why not let the lady decide what she wants to do?

Fancy.

I'm staying here.

No hard feelings, Ron.

We'll see you at the ball tonight. We'll have a drink together, okay?

You can count me.

Vinny, this cruise is for the birds. I thought you were going to arrange

something with Angelica. I got to find her first, right?

Come on. No, no, no.

Oh, no.

Paula's still waiting for me.

I can't go in there.

So stay here.

I'll be right back.

Come on. She may be over at the disco. If not, we'll find some other drug.

Come on.

I was

wondering

why you hate Mr. Rourke so much.

Let's just say that I... I detest self -righteous men.

Almost as much as I appreciate a desirable woman.

He doesn't think I'm so desirable.

Oh, but he does.

Your one mistake was in picking a man whose code of honor is stronger than his

desires.

A weakness I don't have.

I thought I'd find you here, lover.

Get the hell back to your own room, Giselle.

This was my room.

That was yesterday.

Look, there are plenty of rooms. I don't mind moving to another one. For your

own good, Cherie. Go back to where you came from.

Hell, you're no better than I am, you cheap tramp.

That's gorgeous, huh?

I'm sorry, darling.

I detest bad manners.

It's my fault.

It's you.

Yeah, look, I wasn't hungry anyway.

Paula, I'm really sorry about five o 'clock.

Oh, you mean for me rushing to get home from work and get dressed and then

waiting for you for over an hour?

Oh, it was nothing.

Nothing at all. I feel terrible about that. I really do.

It's just that something came up and I just couldn't get out of it. Oh, is that

so? Well, I certainly hope she had more class than the girl who dumped you at

the bar.

Wait a minute.

You've done something to yourself. You look terrific.

Thank you.

At least that's one thing I learned from you.

That what's inside a person doesn't count.

So I spent a week's pay at the beauty shop fixing up the outside.

Harry, here I am.

Well, as you can see, I sure as hell didn't get all fixed up for you.

looking for a ten, sir. You don't seem to be doing all that well with any of

numbers.

Well, maybe it's time I should start thinking about a refund.

That's the joke, folks.

I'll try better next time. Believe me.

I feel like dancing.

Well played, Connie.

You think I'm playing?

Doesn't really matter.

Is he watching us?

He hasn't taken his eyes off you since he came.

Make you feel better?

It helps.

I can only spare you.

That's all it will take.

I thought you said you were a woman now.

With a woman's heart.

That's right. But you still like me like a child.

Hurting yourself because you think it will hurt me.

Look, I asked for a family.

and you chose to give me a lot of lectures on how to be a nice little girl

pretend I have no real feelings.

Well, I do have feelings.

A woman's feelings.

And I'm making the most of it. Fancy. I am!

You see, I had this stupid idea about how real love should be.

Well, you wised me up to that, didn't you?

Thanks for the turndown, Mr.

Rourke.

for creating a scene in front of all my guests.

Would you like to go to your room, Fancy? I'd like that.

Vinnie, you've got to do me a favor. Sure, Joe. What's up?

Look, I know I've been a real drag, but I'm not thinking about Paula anymore.

So let's ask your Miss Western candidate. She'll introduce me to

her model friends.

Fuck.

Way to go, pal.

I just saw a slew of bikinis down by the pool. Come on. Come on, where?

Jelly's sitting right over there.

Oh, yeah.

She looks busy.

Come on, we don't need her anyway.

I get it.

You think I'm going to embarrass you in front of your girl.

You haven't been able to find her when you're with me on purpose, right?

Look, that's not it.

Then come on.

If I get gunned down, I get gunned down. But I'm not going out without one last

try. Come on.

Come on, help.

You remember my pal Joe here.

Oh, sure.

Monique.

Look,

Angelica, I'd, um... Uh,

Vinnie. Uh, yeah, Joe here would like to meet some of your friends.

What do you say, Angelica? You and me and Joe and one of your friends.

I thought I told you how it is.

But I'll do it again.

You were a creep this afternoon.

You're still a creep, and you'll always be a creep.

So why don't you just get lost, okay?

Hey, wait a minute a minute. I want to talk about it, especially to you. What

did I do?

You embarrassed me. That's what you did. Wait a second. It's your fault.

Mouthing off about Miss Western Canada, making believe you're making out with

her like crazy. I said I don't want to talk about it.

Just a second. Don't get so upset.

So you bombed out with the girl.

Deal. I do it all the time.

At least I get dumped by foxes, not dogs.

Hey, hey.

Paula's not a dog.

And she didn't dump me, pal.

I dumped her because I was stupid enough to listen to you.

If I wasn't stupid, I would have realized you were jealous of me.

Me, jealous of you?

Come on. That's right.

That's right.

You didn't want me to know it, but you came up empty.

And I didn't.

I found somebody.

And you had to rain on my parade. Make me into a loser like you.

You really like this Paula that much?

Let me tell you something, Vinnie.

If I still have a chance with her, I would be damn proud to parade her in

of the guys on a Saturday night.

I just hope I'm not too late.

Hey, you're not trying, darling.

No, you.

What are you talking about? Look, I was just trying to make her jealous.

Just let me out of here, please. Yeah, sure.

Sure, but come on.

Come on, we've got to give him reason to be jealous, don't we? Like we planned,

remember? No!

No! Come on!

It's all right now, Fancy. It's all right.

Come. We're leaving.

We're out of here.

We got something to settle first.

You've been aching for this fight for a long time, haven't you, my doll?

Yes.

Even like a stone around my neck.

But no more.

I'm going to kill you.

You haven't won yet.

That's enough!

That's enough!

All I ever really wanted was to be loved by a man I could respect.

So I could respect myself.

And I will come to you, believe me.

Meanwhile, I love you, Fancy, as I always have and

always will.

Can you understand that?

You'll

find

that these boots have... Total comfort without sacrifice and control.

Paula, we've got to talk.

There's nothing to talk about.

Now, I know that these are a little more expensive, but with all the features, I

think they're worthy.

Paula, I know it was crazy of me to stand you up the way I did, but the

weekend's almost over and I don't want to lose you, so could we make believe it

never happened and start all over again?

Hey, how about the demonstration?

Sure, right this way.

Well, it did happen, and as far as I'm concerned, I'm prepared never to see you

again. Come along.

Paula, if we could just go somewhere and talk.

Oh, like an escalator, isn't it? Uh -huh. Oh, it's a lot of fun.

Yeah. Paula, Paula, I need you.

Do you mind? I happen to have a customer.

Excuse me, ma 'am.

Paul,

you've got to listen to me.

Mister, this thing makes me nervous enough, okay?

Okay. Here we go.

I know you like me, too. You don't want it to end like this, do you?

We're gonna be sorry the rest of our life if you don't give us a chance.

Is that what you want?

I finally found my ten.

What are you talking about?

What's a ten?

You are.

Ten times ten.

Oh, Mr. Rourke, the Women's Sports Expo's been a success beyond my wildest

dreams. I can't thank you enough. Oh, it was my pleasure.

And you're right about beauty being in the eye of the beholder.

Just look at her. Isn't she the loveliest eyeful you've ever seen? Oh,

Thank you, Mr. Rourke. You're very welcome, Miss Amanda. Bye -bye. Goodbye,

Athena.

Fancy, fancy, how lovely you look.

I'm afraid Fancy Island is losing one of its loveliest flowers.

Oh, and speaking of flowers...

For old time's sake?

For old time's sake.

I'll always love you, Mr. Rourke.

And I you, Fancy.

Be happy.

Why, Lawrence, where have you been?

Excuse me, sir. But I thought perhaps you'd prefer to say your goodbyes to

Fancy by yourself.

Oh, thank you. That was very thoughtful. Thank you.

A difficult thing, this business of growing up, isn't it?

Yes, and what is most amazing is that after all these years of human history,

everyone still has to make their own mistakes along the way.

However, doesn't it add a certain amount of excitement to it, sir?

Oh, indeed. It's what makes the whole game worth playing.