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1
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Bye -bye.
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00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:28,860
Good morning, Mark. Good morning,
Tattoo.
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Ah, good morning, Julie.
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Mm -hmm. Uh, you know the family that
arrived yesterday with the three little
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00:01:35,410 --> 00:01:36,610
kids? Oh, yes, yes.
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Well, I volunteered to babysit while
their parents went out for a little
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Oh, that was very considerate of you,
Julie.
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Well, the little walk was to the other
side of the island, and now they're
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trapped by a cloudburst, and they can't
get back till tomorrow.
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Uh -uh.
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00:01:55,190 --> 00:02:01,070
Mr. Rourke, I'm practically a nervous
wreck. They put a frog in my bathtub,
12
00:02:01,070 --> 00:02:06,440
that... Then I found worms in the sugar
bowl. And who knows what they're up to
13
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:07,440
right now.
14
00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:08,940
Courage, my dear Julie.
15
00:02:09,220 --> 00:02:13,540
I'm sure Tattoo will assume your duties
while you struggle through your noble
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00:02:13,540 --> 00:02:14,540
deed.
17
00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:16,840
Thank you, Tattoo.
18
00:03:01,710 --> 00:03:02,710
Smiles, everyone.
19
00:03:02,790 --> 00:03:03,790
Smiles.
20
00:03:09,130 --> 00:03:11,730
Oh, who is that good -looking lady?
21
00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:16,170
Miss Laurel Fandel, who operates a gift
shop in Torrington, Wyoming.
22
00:03:16,650 --> 00:03:20,210
Her fantasy is to be something she has
never been before.
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00:03:20,730 --> 00:03:25,010
A woman who is the center of all
attention, revered, queen -like.
24
00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:30,210
Take it from me, boss. Most of the
ladies want to be placed on a...
25
00:03:30,550 --> 00:03:32,680
Pedestal. You're right, Atul.
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00:03:33,260 --> 00:03:39,060
But in Miss Vandell's particular case, I
fear her wish fulfillment may conjure
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up certain dark powers that are beyond
my control.
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00:03:49,820 --> 00:03:55,440
That rather shy young man is Mr. Herbert
Snyder, a computer systems engineer.
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00:03:55,740 --> 00:03:59,640
His fantasy is to spend the weekend in a
harem.
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00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,840
Boss, let me go with him, in case he
needs me.
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All his life, Mr. Snyder has been
insecure about forming any sort of
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relationships, and he hopes that a harem
experience will give him the confidence
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he lacks.
34
00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:17,839
Boss, you know, lately my confidence is
slipping.
35
00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:22,360
Don't be too envious of Mr. Snyder yet,
my friend.
36
00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:26,820
His fantasy may be far more unsettling
than he imagines.
37
00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:29,600
My dear guest!
38
00:04:29,950 --> 00:04:31,570
I am Mr. Rourke, your host.
39
00:04:32,130 --> 00:04:33,990
Welcome to Fantasy Island.
40
00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:29,200
When does my fantasy start, Mr. Rourke?
Oh, I am prepared to grant it now.
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00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:33,120
But first, there are certain things you
should know.
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00:05:33,660 --> 00:05:34,700
Please have a seat, won't you?
43
00:05:35,940 --> 00:05:36,940
Sure.
44
00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:43,360
Somewhere in your past, oh, hundreds of
years ago, a member of your family was a
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00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:45,700
queen. Queen of the Druids.
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The Druids were an ancient people who
practiced the art of black magic.
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00:05:51,240 --> 00:05:56,220
Near here, there is an island where
Stonehenge has been resurrected and
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00:05:56,220 --> 00:06:02,940
they live as they did years ago and
where they still practice that art and
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00:06:02,940 --> 00:06:07,120
they wait for a queen to rule over them
as your ancestor did.
50
00:06:07,680 --> 00:06:09,120
I don't think you should go.
51
00:06:09,780 --> 00:06:11,220
It sounds too dangerous.
52
00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:14,980
I really want this fantasy.
53
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:17,680
Very well.
54
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This way, please.
55
00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:20,720
Tattoo?
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00:06:25,200 --> 00:06:27,200
There's still time to change your mind,
you know.
57
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Nope. I'm ready.
58
00:06:30,820 --> 00:06:31,960
Good luck, Miss Van Dyke.
59
00:06:37,620 --> 00:06:41,560
Your fantasy can be fulfilled only out
of what you are.
60
00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:47,880
It is possible to weave your future, but
only from the fibers of your own path.
61
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:50,780
And that of your answer.
62
00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:54,440
That involves many unknowns.
63
00:07:11,020 --> 00:07:12,220
What happened? Is this me?
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00:07:26,140 --> 00:07:27,140
The crown!
65
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:29,100
She wears the crown!
66
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:54,460
Do I look okay, Mr. Rook? I mean, what
do you wear to a harem?
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00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:58,860
Who do you ask? You look very dapper
indeed, Mr.
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Snyder. Eh, Tattoo?
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00:08:00,380 --> 00:08:01,380
It's a bit former.
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00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:06,740
Well, perhaps, but I am sure Mr.
Snyder's fantasy will help him to loosen
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00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:09,700
Now, if you'll get in the car, our
driver will take you to the north end of
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island where your fantasy will begin.
73
00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:15,860
Tattoo, what are you doing?
74
00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:17,820
My job, boss.
75
00:08:18,300 --> 00:08:19,640
He's too nervous to go alone.
76
00:08:20,180 --> 00:08:21,640
No, no, it's not nerves.
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00:08:22,220 --> 00:08:23,960
I'm having my first heart attack.
78
00:08:24,340 --> 00:08:30,840
Actually, Mr. Snyder, I think you're
going to be... just fine.
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00:08:30,940 --> 00:08:31,899
I'm sorry.
80
00:08:31,900 --> 00:08:32,900
I'm sorry.
81
00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:34,760
You're okay.
82
00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:37,280
I'll be fine.
83
00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:07,460
Where did you come from?
84
00:09:09,320 --> 00:09:11,040
Girls, look here.
85
00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:13,960
Isn't it cute?
86
00:09:15,460 --> 00:09:16,460
Hello.
87
00:09:17,420 --> 00:09:22,980
My name is Herbert Snyder.
88
00:09:24,860 --> 00:09:29,080
My friends call me Herbie.
89
00:09:31,980 --> 00:09:32,980
Where?
90
00:09:34,090 --> 00:09:36,450
You must be Mr. Snyder, huh?
91
00:09:36,670 --> 00:09:39,690
Yes. My friends call me Herbie.
92
00:09:40,210 --> 00:09:41,210
Herbie.
93
00:09:43,150 --> 00:09:46,370
Herbie. Why, why, why are you so shy?
94
00:09:46,750 --> 00:09:50,030
I just picked it up somewhere.
95
00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:51,570
Oh, well.
96
00:09:51,970 --> 00:09:55,390
Now, I'll just see if I can't put you at
your ease, okay?
97
00:09:56,390 --> 00:09:57,390
Okay.
98
00:09:58,210 --> 00:10:00,490
I'm called Contessa.
99
00:10:01,340 --> 00:10:05,040
And I understand that you want to be in
the harem, huh?
100
00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:08,480
Well,
101
00:10:08,920 --> 00:10:12,380
are you quite certain that you won't be
shocked by what you're going to
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00:10:12,380 --> 00:10:18,840
encounter? Oh, no. No, no. I've been
around the block a couple times. Of
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00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:25,300
course. But I think I should explain
that the experience might prove to be
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00:10:25,300 --> 00:10:27,440
quite exhausting.
105
00:10:34,820 --> 00:10:37,760
Oh, come on, Herbie. It's on to the
harem.
106
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:44,780
Aren't they coming with us? No, no,
love. The harem's not for us. It's for
107
00:10:45,500 --> 00:10:50,840
If they're not in the harem and you're
not in the harem, who's in the harem?
108
00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:11,690
Welcome to the Contessa's harem, buddy.
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00:11:12,370 --> 00:11:14,010
You better start getting in shape.
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00:11:56,520 --> 00:11:57,520
Yes, I answered.
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00:11:58,380 --> 00:11:59,640
Yes, I answered.
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00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:01,280
Etain! Etain!
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00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:06,660
Say, Bill, you know better than to
interrupt. I'm sorry, but she's here.
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00:12:06,660 --> 00:12:07,660
queen has come.
115
00:12:08,620 --> 00:12:09,620
Look for yourself.
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00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:12,100
You see?
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She wears the crown.
118
00:12:29,320 --> 00:12:30,700
Laurel? Laurel Fandel.
119
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Then it's true.
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Laurel, of course, and Fandel.
121
00:12:35,680 --> 00:12:37,800
The corruption of the name Fand.
122
00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:40,360
Was Fand your father's family name?
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Yes, it was. That was the old Gaelic
spelling.
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Tell me, have you a husband?
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No.
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00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:50,720
Why?
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Because that is the final sign.
128
00:12:53,630 --> 00:12:57,070
You see, it is written that one day the
beautiful daughter of Fan shall appear
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00:12:57,070 --> 00:12:58,850
and restore your glories.
130
00:12:59,370 --> 00:13:01,670
And she will be crowned your virgin
queen.
131
00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:06,130
Hear me, your high priestess.
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00:13:06,670 --> 00:13:08,530
Hear me, your children of the druids.
133
00:13:09,110 --> 00:13:11,550
Your long wait has finally come to an
end.
134
00:13:12,050 --> 00:13:13,390
Behold the daughter of Fan.
135
00:13:15,830 --> 00:13:19,130
Behold Laura, whose very home crowned
ancient heroes.
136
00:13:20,010 --> 00:13:22,450
Behold our queen, Laura.
137
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:29,080
Thank you, Mr. Rourke, wherever you are.
138
00:13:49,220 --> 00:13:53,360
You'd better not let Alvar catch you.
He'll be very angry if you avoid your
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00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:54,360
weight training.
140
00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:58,280
A firing squad couldn't get me to pick
this thing up.
141
00:13:59,660 --> 00:14:02,900
Besides, this is all a terrible mistake.
142
00:14:03,620 --> 00:14:07,800
I don't belong here at that motel,
macho.
143
00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:12,520
Who, by the way, is Alvar?
144
00:14:13,540 --> 00:14:14,540
Alvar.
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00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:16,500
The mean -looking one.
146
00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:21,620
Yeah. Come on.
147
00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:26,480
Oh.
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00:14:26,660 --> 00:14:28,160
Oh, sorry.
149
00:14:29,120 --> 00:14:30,260
That's all right.
150
00:14:30,740 --> 00:14:32,380
It was nice.
151
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,200
Friendly.
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00:14:36,480 --> 00:14:41,080
What did you mean when you said that
there'd been a mistake, that you don't
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belong here?
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00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:46,980
Well, when I came to Fantasy Island, I
thought there'd be, you know...
155
00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:51,700
That there'd be girls? Exactly.
156
00:14:52,180 --> 00:14:57,380
I mean, Webster's dictionary clearly
defines a harem as a household of...
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00:14:57,380 --> 00:15:00,400
women.
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00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:02,840
Not men.
159
00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:05,600
Oh.
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00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,920
I didn't know that.
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00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:10,880
What's your name?
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Herbert.
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00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:15,480
I'm Lisa.
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00:15:16,020 --> 00:15:17,020
Hello, Lisa.
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00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:22,160
It's... It has a... a classic ring.
166
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:31,560
Actually, we shouldn't be doing this at
all. We haven't done anything yet.
167
00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:36,200
Although I get the distinct feeling that
I have been tried, found guilty, and am
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00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:39,820
now being held... prisoner.
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I am.
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00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:43,480
Well, I guess you are, in a sense.
171
00:15:45,340 --> 00:15:46,680
Well, I gotta get out of here.
172
00:15:47,750 --> 00:15:48,750
Will you help me?
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00:15:49,390 --> 00:15:51,810
Herbert, Alvar has guards posted
everywhere.
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00:15:52,570 --> 00:15:55,330
You better get out of here, Lisa, before
you get into bad trouble.
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00:16:01,190 --> 00:16:02,470
Now, hear me good, pal.
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00:16:02,850 --> 00:16:05,350
Lisa's off limits. A definite no -no.
Understand?
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00:16:05,990 --> 00:16:07,370
No, I don't understand.
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00:16:07,750 --> 00:16:09,890
And why do you suppose I'd take orders
from you anyway?
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00:16:10,590 --> 00:16:13,470
Because I'll tear your head off and play
soccer with it if you don't.
180
00:16:13,990 --> 00:16:15,230
That makes sense.
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00:16:16,060 --> 00:16:19,940
Besides which, that's the way the
Contessa wants it. And I make sure she
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00:16:19,940 --> 00:16:22,320
everything. And I mean everything she
wants.
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00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:23,640
Now move it!
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00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:27,960
Time out. I mean no fantasy. Back to
reality.
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00:16:28,340 --> 00:16:35,280
This is all a mistake. I'm Herb Snyder.
And this is not right.
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00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:36,940
I'm sure it's not your fault, you know?
187
00:16:37,180 --> 00:16:38,180
Now listen, pal.
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00:16:39,100 --> 00:16:43,160
Before I met the Contessa, my life was
one long drag of pumping iron and
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00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:44,160
gas.
190
00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:48,110
Now I'm living in Fat City, and I don't
want anybody making waves.
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00:16:49,310 --> 00:16:50,310
Get the message?
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00:16:52,450 --> 00:16:53,450
Move it.
193
00:17:05,930 --> 00:17:06,930
Yes, come in.
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00:17:07,530 --> 00:17:08,530
Come in.
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00:17:08,630 --> 00:17:09,670
Mr. Rourke? Mr.
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00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:12,510
Henley, how are you, sir? I'm here to
make a serious complaint.
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00:17:13,210 --> 00:17:17,359
Oh? As you remember, I came here to do a
fantasy based on my favorite book, The
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00:17:17,359 --> 00:17:18,359
Hunchback of Notre Dame.
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00:17:18,619 --> 00:17:23,200
I remember quite clearly, Mr. Henley,
but didn't we deliver your fantasy?
200
00:17:23,619 --> 00:17:26,599
Well, no. I mean, I found myself a
medieval parasaurite.
201
00:17:26,859 --> 00:17:28,680
I did meet the lovely Esmeralda.
202
00:17:28,940 --> 00:17:33,000
And I saw the hunchback up there
swinging on the bell rope.
203
00:17:33,380 --> 00:17:36,300
He was so high up there, he looked small
to me.
204
00:17:36,860 --> 00:17:38,020
But he was magnificent.
205
00:17:39,540 --> 00:17:41,620
Well? His rope broke.
206
00:17:43,270 --> 00:17:44,510
The rope broke?
207
00:17:44,870 --> 00:17:48,210
The last time I saw him, he was falling
to earth like a brick, Mr. Rourke.
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00:17:48,710 --> 00:17:49,750
Yelling pathetically.
209
00:17:50,750 --> 00:17:54,630
Look, I either want a refund or I want
to do a new fantasy.
210
00:17:55,050 --> 00:17:56,970
Oh, certainly, Mr. Henley.
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00:17:57,270 --> 00:18:01,090
Certainly. If you just step outside, my
assistant Julie will make the necessary
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00:18:01,090 --> 00:18:02,430
arrangements. Is that satisfactory?
213
00:18:03,090 --> 00:18:06,710
Yes. Maybe I could do my next favorite
book, Les Miserables.
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00:18:07,470 --> 00:18:08,770
You can't fall out of a sewer.
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00:18:13,490 --> 00:18:19,770
But, but, I'll never do the hunchback of
Notre Dame fantasy again, ever. Not
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00:18:19,770 --> 00:18:23,790
until you buy new ropes for all the
bells. I promise that, too.
217
00:18:24,990 --> 00:18:25,910
Look, but...
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00:18:25,910 --> 00:18:33,610
I'm
219
00:18:33,610 --> 00:18:35,210
sorry I'm so dumb about all this.
220
00:18:35,650 --> 00:18:39,670
I always thought the Druids were either
ancient sorcerers or modern kooks.
221
00:18:39,930 --> 00:18:42,130
Well, we tried to encourage that image,
my queen.
222
00:18:42,730 --> 00:18:46,250
Ever since our ancestors were crushed by
the Romans and the groves of Mona
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00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:49,710
destroyed. I remember reading something
about that in Greek literature.
224
00:18:50,370 --> 00:18:53,290
But what interests me is the name Phan.
I've never heard it before.
225
00:18:53,910 --> 00:18:55,350
Of course you haven't, darling.
226
00:18:55,790 --> 00:18:58,230
You see, Paul is new among us.
227
00:18:58,510 --> 00:19:00,030
This is his first solstice.
228
00:19:00,490 --> 00:19:05,270
But it won't be his last. He shows great
promise.
229
00:19:06,110 --> 00:19:07,450
I'll take that as a compliment.
230
00:19:07,930 --> 00:19:09,690
But it still doesn't explain Phan.
231
00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:13,340
My grandparents never would talk about
why they changed the spelling.
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00:19:14,660 --> 00:19:20,660
There's an old tale, my queen, about a
fabled king of Ulster who one day
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00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:25,400
into a fairy forest and there saw a most
beautiful fairy woman named Fand.
234
00:19:26,340 --> 00:19:30,800
She mocked him and tempted him, and he
wanted her badly, but he couldn't
235
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:37,500
her because, you see, he was human, and
she was a woodland sprite. It drove him
236
00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:38,500
mad.
237
00:19:38,540 --> 00:19:44,040
And her punishment was to be transformed
in a human and to mother a cursed lion.
238
00:19:45,020 --> 00:19:46,500
To mother a cursed lion?
239
00:19:47,180 --> 00:19:51,960
Aha! I suspected something dark and
dreadful, my queen, and one so
240
00:19:58,980 --> 00:20:04,460
There is another part of the fable which
says that one day the daughter of Fand
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00:20:04,460 --> 00:20:07,080
will rule as the queen of the druids.
242
00:20:07,610 --> 00:20:08,610
and lift the curse.
243
00:20:10,670 --> 00:20:17,190
In any case, a queen is not for a mere
mortal like you.
244
00:20:19,190 --> 00:20:21,530
I'm afraid I don't feel much like a
queen yet.
245
00:20:22,810 --> 00:20:25,430
What am I supposed to do? What's
expected of me?
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00:20:25,950 --> 00:20:28,350
All that'll be explained tomorrow at the
coronation.
247
00:20:28,590 --> 00:20:29,650
The coronation?
248
00:20:30,050 --> 00:20:31,050
Of course.
249
00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:32,730
Now come with me.
250
00:20:43,310 --> 00:20:46,050
But in the meantime, enjoy the adoration
of his subject.
251
00:20:48,590 --> 00:20:50,010
Hail to the Queen!
252
00:20:50,510 --> 00:20:52,210
Hail to the Queen!
253
00:20:53,130 --> 00:20:55,390
Hail to Queen Laurel!
254
00:20:56,130 --> 00:20:58,010
Laurel, Queen of the Druids!
255
00:20:59,150 --> 00:21:01,150
Laurel, Queen of the Druids!
256
00:21:02,130 --> 00:21:03,930
Laurel, Queen of the Druids!
257
00:21:05,010 --> 00:21:06,730
Laurel, Queen of the Druids!
258
00:21:07,430 --> 00:21:09,670
There's no curse attached to a high
priest.
259
00:21:12,710 --> 00:21:15,630
Only the promise of great pleasure.
260
00:21:21,550 --> 00:21:23,250
Yes, I can see.
261
00:21:24,310 --> 00:21:26,350
Together you will stand with me as high
priest.
262
00:21:27,990 --> 00:21:31,170
And together we will give Queen Laurel
to Canute as his bride.
263
00:21:33,030 --> 00:21:34,170
Canute is just a legend.
264
00:21:34,590 --> 00:21:35,790
A mythical creation.
265
00:21:36,390 --> 00:21:38,170
He's given us a sign. He will appear.
266
00:21:38,990 --> 00:21:39,990
Say he does appear.
267
00:21:41,490 --> 00:21:42,490
What happens to her?
268
00:21:43,350 --> 00:21:44,350
She's human.
269
00:21:45,190 --> 00:21:47,870
To be joined to Carnucci, she must die.
270
00:22:01,350 --> 00:22:02,350
Well.
271
00:22:03,090 --> 00:22:04,090
Here he is, Contessa.
272
00:22:04,390 --> 00:22:05,950
Thank you, Alvar. That'll be all.
273
00:22:07,270 --> 00:22:08,470
You may go too, Red.
274
00:22:14,090 --> 00:22:15,090
Hello again.
275
00:22:17,450 --> 00:22:18,730
Oh, I see you've met.
276
00:22:19,370 --> 00:22:20,610
Why didn't you tell me, Lisa?
277
00:22:21,110 --> 00:22:23,870
You're always so busy, Mother. I didn't
think you'd be interested.
278
00:22:24,450 --> 00:22:25,450
Mother?
279
00:22:26,230 --> 00:22:28,230
Of course I'm interested.
280
00:22:29,490 --> 00:22:30,830
You'll have to forgive Lisa.
281
00:22:32,890 --> 00:22:35,890
Seems that she doesn't approve of me or
my lifestyle.
282
00:22:36,510 --> 00:22:39,830
Having a harem is second and immoral and
immature.
283
00:22:40,970 --> 00:22:42,030
Precisely what I had in mind.
284
00:22:43,180 --> 00:22:47,520
The only meaningful relationship is
between one man and one woman.
285
00:22:48,020 --> 00:22:49,140
I totally agree.
286
00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:50,480
Oh, really?
287
00:22:50,660 --> 00:22:52,440
Then why did you come here in the first
place?
288
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:54,000
Oh, that was different.
289
00:22:54,300 --> 00:22:58,420
Oh. Well, I certainly didn't expect to
find it. That the harem was composed of
290
00:22:58,420 --> 00:22:59,960
men and that the harem keeper was a
woman?
291
00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:01,700
Oh, Herbie.
292
00:23:02,460 --> 00:23:06,800
Oh, I'm afraid that you are basically
just a male chauvinist.
293
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:08,380
Any wealthy man.
294
00:23:09,100 --> 00:23:13,860
may keep acres of nubile young women at
his disposal without affecting his
295
00:23:13,860 --> 00:23:15,380
public image in the slightest.
296
00:23:16,100 --> 00:23:17,300
I've heard it all before.
297
00:23:17,860 --> 00:23:21,680
Catherine the Great and Elizabeth I had
scores of lovers which didn't affect
298
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:23,920
their capabilities to rule in the
slightest.
299
00:23:24,540 --> 00:23:26,620
I believe you like this young man, Lisa.
300
00:23:28,740 --> 00:23:30,380
Yes, I can feel a certain energy.
301
00:23:31,620 --> 00:23:32,740
Why don't you take him?
302
00:23:33,260 --> 00:23:35,120
What a disgusting way to put it.
303
00:23:35,820 --> 00:23:40,460
Look, Lisa is not the sort of person who
picks out a lover as if she were
304
00:23:40,460 --> 00:23:41,860
choosing a used car.
305
00:23:44,380 --> 00:23:49,140
Well, if you don't want Herbie, Lisa, I
do.
306
00:23:53,980 --> 00:23:58,580
I'll expect you this evening, Herbie,
and I know I won't be disappointed.
307
00:23:59,020 --> 00:24:00,020
Come along, Lisa.
308
00:24:00,380 --> 00:24:01,380
Alvar?
309
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:04,400
Terrible that I am here. I'm terrible.
310
00:24:04,700 --> 00:24:05,700
Don't touch me.
311
00:24:05,860 --> 00:24:06,860
Don't touch me.
312
00:24:07,300 --> 00:24:09,540
Okay, now I'm mad. Put me down.
313
00:24:09,740 --> 00:24:10,740
Put me down!
314
00:24:51,020 --> 00:24:52,020
My queen?
315
00:24:52,100 --> 00:24:54,440
Oh, it's really not necessary.
316
00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:56,840
But you are a queen.
317
00:24:57,120 --> 00:24:59,720
Oh, I'm really someone from Torrington,
Wyoming.
318
00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:01,400
He's having a wonderful fantasy.
319
00:25:02,140 --> 00:25:03,140
I see.
320
00:25:04,220 --> 00:25:07,640
Believe me, to these people, this is not
a fantasy.
321
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:10,180
It's very, very real.
322
00:25:12,380 --> 00:25:14,000
Could we talk somewhere alone?
323
00:25:14,980 --> 00:25:15,980
Of course.
324
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:30,840
I don't know how to tell you this, but
you're in real danger.
325
00:25:32,260 --> 00:25:33,740
Danger? For what?
326
00:25:34,300 --> 00:25:37,740
Look, I'm not one of these people. Not
really. This is just a research project
327
00:25:37,740 --> 00:25:38,740
for me.
328
00:25:39,540 --> 00:25:42,780
I'm really sorry, but I don't know what
you're talking about. Of course you
329
00:25:42,780 --> 00:25:44,120
don't. But you have to trust me.
330
00:25:44,540 --> 00:25:46,440
I think I've heard this line somewhere
before.
331
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:49,940
Please. I'm not playing games. I'm
trying to save your life.
332
00:26:01,350 --> 00:26:02,970
So -called coronation tomorrow.
333
00:26:03,850 --> 00:26:07,430
Attain told me what it really is. It's a
sacrificial rite, and you're the fatted
334
00:26:07,430 --> 00:26:10,290
calf. Are you trying to tell me these
people are murderers?
335
00:26:12,110 --> 00:26:14,350
I'm telling you, they're true believers.
336
00:26:15,150 --> 00:26:18,330
There's no doubt in their mind that some
shaggy whore of a god is going to come
337
00:26:18,330 --> 00:26:19,330
out of the jungle tomorrow.
338
00:26:20,870 --> 00:26:22,710
And they're going to give you to him as
his bride.
339
00:26:24,310 --> 00:26:25,450
Do you believe this?
340
00:26:27,030 --> 00:26:28,550
Look, I know how it sounds.
341
00:26:29,580 --> 00:26:31,220
But I'm talking about your pretty neck.
342
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,680
This god of theirs may be in their mind.
I don't know.
343
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:37,340
But they'll kill you for him just the
same.
344
00:26:38,820 --> 00:26:40,500
Now, you've got to get out of here now.
345
00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:42,560
I think not, Paul.
346
00:26:47,220 --> 00:26:51,260
To try to seduce our queen with wild
lies is a contemptible offense that
347
00:26:51,260 --> 00:26:52,480
be dealt with later. Lock him up.
348
00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:57,460
I'm sorry, my queen.
349
00:26:58,380 --> 00:27:00,660
But there are always those who betray
the order.
350
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:04,080
You see, he mistook ritual for reality.
351
00:27:04,740 --> 00:27:08,040
I would have stolen from you the most
magnificent experience of any queen.
352
00:27:08,340 --> 00:27:09,520
Her coronation.
353
00:27:10,120 --> 00:27:12,280
And here's the real answer to your
doubts.
354
00:27:12,540 --> 00:27:14,260
The veneration of your subject.
355
00:28:04,430 --> 00:28:07,010
so soon, and it's just the shank of the
evening.
356
00:28:07,250 --> 00:28:10,230
Look, Contessa, I've already made a fool
of myself.
357
00:28:10,870 --> 00:28:14,730
This is all a big mistake. Anyway, I'm
not much of a shank man.
358
00:28:15,010 --> 00:28:21,370
Some people may find the rhythm old
-fashioned, but I simply adore, I adore
359
00:28:21,370 --> 00:28:24,550
incessant, repetitive bolero.
360
00:28:24,810 --> 00:28:27,810
Oh, it's so erotic and stimulating.
361
00:28:28,610 --> 00:28:30,410
Oh, can you feel it?
362
00:28:31,890 --> 00:28:35,070
It's, uh, actually, I... You know, a
little warm.
363
00:28:35,490 --> 00:28:36,570
Warm? Oh.
364
00:28:37,190 --> 00:28:42,590
Well, then perhaps we should just, uh...
No, no, no. Don't do that. Look,
365
00:28:42,850 --> 00:28:48,650
Contessa. I mean, you're a beautiful
lady, but I'm not interested, you know?
366
00:28:57,830 --> 00:29:00,130
Oh, Herbie.
367
00:29:00,690 --> 00:29:02,770
Oh, Herbie, for someone who's not
interested.
368
00:29:03,340 --> 00:29:06,440
That was a very interesting kiss. Yeah.
369
00:29:06,740 --> 00:29:11,600
I find your honest shyness positively
thrilling.
370
00:29:12,780 --> 00:29:16,500
Oh, no. Yes. Oh, no. No, no, no. Yes.
371
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:19,720
Yes. No man
372
00:29:19,720 --> 00:29:26,660
makes a fool of me in my own bedroom.
373
00:29:27,040 --> 00:29:28,040
Alvar!
374
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:32,000
I warned you once before. This time
you're going to pay the price.
375
00:29:33,069 --> 00:29:34,750
Alvar, it's not what it looks like.
376
00:29:34,970 --> 00:29:40,010
We were pulling back and forth, back and
forth, one way we went, and Alvar...
377
00:29:40,010 --> 00:29:48,910
Will
378
00:29:48,910 --> 00:29:50,190
there be anything else, my queen?
379
00:29:50,490 --> 00:29:51,490
No, thank you, Sybil.
380
00:29:52,430 --> 00:29:56,370
Then we'll be back in an hour to dress
you for the coronation.
381
00:30:10,250 --> 00:30:13,830
I see you find the weight of a queen's
crown to be light and pleasant, Miss
382
00:30:13,830 --> 00:30:14,789
Vandell. Mr.
383
00:30:14,790 --> 00:30:16,030
Rourke! Is everything satisfactory?
384
00:30:16,890 --> 00:30:18,930
I don't know that's exactly the right
word.
385
00:30:19,130 --> 00:30:20,450
Oh? There's something wrong.
386
00:30:20,650 --> 00:30:21,650
Wrong, Miss Vandell?
387
00:30:21,790 --> 00:30:22,970
It's hard to explain.
388
00:30:23,250 --> 00:30:27,750
Maybe it's just this mood or attitude,
but... There ain't something wrong.
389
00:30:27,970 --> 00:30:29,490
There's this young man named Paul.
390
00:30:30,090 --> 00:30:32,950
Ah. I'm afraid I've gotten him into some
trouble.
391
00:30:33,150 --> 00:30:36,230
Well, it should be simple for you to
correct that. After all, you are the
392
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:40,600
You're right.
393
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:44,300
What is wrong with me? I keep forgetting
that.
394
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:47,040
He's under some sort of house arrest.
395
00:30:47,380 --> 00:30:49,220
I'll just order them to let him go.
396
00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:52,820
A queen must test her power to truly
savor it.
397
00:30:53,900 --> 00:30:56,300
Is there some special reason you're
here, Mr. Rourke?
398
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:05,060
I was concerned, Miss Vandell, that
among those fibers of your past which
399
00:31:05,060 --> 00:31:06,480
woven into your fantasy...
400
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:11,560
A dark and evil one might have appeared
to threaten you.
401
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:14,040
The dark and evil one?
402
00:31:16,020 --> 00:31:17,660
Then I wasn't just seeing things.
403
00:31:20,900 --> 00:31:23,240
Listen carefully, Miss Randell.
404
00:31:23,940 --> 00:31:25,180
What was he doing?
405
00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:32,220
The great god Pan, down in the reeds by
the river, spreading ruin in an evil
406
00:31:32,220 --> 00:31:33,220
shower.
407
00:31:34,200 --> 00:31:40,410
Splashing and trampling with hope. hoofs
of a goat, ravaging the golden lilies
408
00:31:40,410 --> 00:31:44,450
afloat, but fleeing the silver acorn's
power.
409
00:31:46,270 --> 00:31:48,250
I don't think I understand.
410
00:31:50,370 --> 00:31:52,110
You will, Miss Vandell.
411
00:31:55,730 --> 00:32:01,430
This silver acorn is very, very old.
412
00:32:02,090 --> 00:32:06,450
That is said to have certain powers
greatly feared by the forces of
413
00:32:12,450 --> 00:32:14,070
Wear it, Miss Vandell.
414
00:32:15,310 --> 00:32:17,750
Wear it at all times.
415
00:32:19,310 --> 00:32:25,550
If you have great need, I promise you,
the silver acorn will not fail you.
416
00:32:28,010 --> 00:32:29,470
I promise, Mr. Wolf.
417
00:32:29,830 --> 00:32:31,030
I won't take it off.
418
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:32,280
Please.
419
00:32:33,140 --> 00:32:34,140
Please don't.
420
00:32:40,840 --> 00:32:41,840
Mr. Rourke.
421
00:32:42,460 --> 00:32:43,460
Mr. Rourke.
422
00:32:52,420 --> 00:32:55,180
Some of the other jocks around here have
been thinking about moving on.
423
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:58,660
But they'll all fall in line when they
see what I do to you later on.
424
00:32:59,710 --> 00:33:00,970
Have a nice day, buddy boy.
425
00:33:14,710 --> 00:33:17,730
Lisa. I heard what you did to Mother.
426
00:33:18,190 --> 00:33:19,190
It's so funny.
427
00:33:19,690 --> 00:33:20,790
But it's also awful.
428
00:33:21,390 --> 00:33:25,210
Because now Alfred is going to make an
example of you and I... And you what?
429
00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:29,800
Alvar used to be a professional fighter,
and I just don't want to see you get
430
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:32,360
hurt. I've never been real big on pain
myself.
431
00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:35,140
Is there another reason?
432
00:33:36,660 --> 00:33:38,860
What other reason could there possibly
be?
433
00:33:40,860 --> 00:33:44,800
That's what I want to find out, but not
with Alvar breathing down our necks.
434
00:33:45,140 --> 00:33:47,760
We've got to get out of here. Come on.
No, the guards.
435
00:33:48,480 --> 00:33:49,660
We'll take our chances.
436
00:34:23,179 --> 00:34:24,179
You are the symbol, you are the sign.
437
00:34:25,060 --> 00:34:27,580
You are the symbol, you are the sign.
438
00:34:27,900 --> 00:34:30,440
Be with us on thy special day, O
Carnute.
439
00:34:30,659 --> 00:34:34,400
Be pleased with thy children and restore
our work.
440
00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:41,520
O Carnute, you are the symbol, you are
the sign.
441
00:34:41,940 --> 00:34:44,500
You are the symbol, you are the sign.
442
00:34:45,600 --> 00:34:47,860
I want Paul released now.
443
00:34:48,340 --> 00:34:51,580
I'm sorry, but he's not to come out by
order of the high priestess.
444
00:34:52,799 --> 00:34:55,060
Queen. Look, I'm just doing what I'm
told.
445
00:34:55,540 --> 00:34:56,800
You can go in if you wish.
446
00:35:02,300 --> 00:35:03,900
This is quite an honor, Your Majesty.
447
00:35:04,740 --> 00:35:07,200
What is it?
448
00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:08,580
I just saw them praying.
449
00:35:09,180 --> 00:35:10,760
At least I think they were praying.
450
00:35:11,300 --> 00:35:12,300
We've got to get away.
451
00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:16,640
If what you said is true and I'm to be
sacrificed, they can't let you live
452
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:17,640
either?
453
00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:19,600
Laurel, it's now or never.
454
00:35:27,790 --> 00:35:28,790
I'm ready to leave now.
455
00:35:57,610 --> 00:35:58,610
Take him back.
456
00:36:12,090 --> 00:36:15,130
My queen, I'm sorry for the disturbance.
457
00:36:19,670 --> 00:36:22,190
Sybil, prepare.
458
00:36:28,250 --> 00:36:30,090
Arnott! Arnott!
459
00:36:30,750 --> 00:36:33,270
Arnott! Arnott!
460
00:36:33,870 --> 00:36:35,650
Arnott! Arnott!
461
00:36:39,410 --> 00:36:40,410
Arnott!
462
00:36:43,150 --> 00:36:45,390
Arnott! Arnott!
463
00:36:45,590 --> 00:36:46,169
Arnott! Arnott! Arnott! Arnott! Arnott!
Arnott! Arnott!
464
00:36:46,170 --> 00:36:47,170
Arnott!
465
00:36:54,270 --> 00:36:57,960
Arnott! Oh, Herbert, I'm sorry. I
thought I knew this place.
466
00:36:58,200 --> 00:36:59,200
Don't be upset.
467
00:36:59,300 --> 00:37:00,480
We're going in circles.
468
00:37:01,220 --> 00:37:02,580
Alvar's dummies are, too.
469
00:37:03,260 --> 00:37:04,260
Let's sit down.
470
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:07,280
I think you look tired.
471
00:37:12,140 --> 00:37:14,980
You don't like that place much.
472
00:37:16,320 --> 00:37:17,320
Where do you stay?
473
00:37:19,040 --> 00:37:21,320
You know, the Contessa is my mother.
474
00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:26,780
And it's... Not something I'm exactly
proud to admit. Lisa, you don't have to
475
00:37:26,780 --> 00:37:27,780
ashamed.
476
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:34,780
I mean, just because your mother is
into... I mean, that doesn't mean
477
00:37:34,780 --> 00:37:40,080
that you have the same... Does it?
478
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:44,980
Actually, it is just the opposite.
479
00:37:46,280 --> 00:37:49,120
Mother has me watched day and night.
480
00:37:51,060 --> 00:37:52,360
I've never really...
481
00:37:52,840 --> 00:37:54,420
known a man before.
482
00:37:55,060 --> 00:37:56,600
We have a lot in common.
483
00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:01,100
I learn about things from books.
484
00:38:02,220 --> 00:38:03,860
There are no books about women.
485
00:38:04,540 --> 00:38:11,400
And I love ladies. I mean, their beauty,
their mystery, they astound me.
486
00:38:11,800 --> 00:38:16,040
But when I get close, I...
487
00:38:16,040 --> 00:38:20,860
I came here to Fantasy Island to...
488
00:38:21,870 --> 00:38:22,870
To experience.
489
00:38:23,370 --> 00:38:24,370
Learn.
490
00:38:25,230 --> 00:38:26,510
To prove to myself.
491
00:38:27,850 --> 00:38:28,850
Herbert.
492
00:38:29,690 --> 00:38:31,970
You don't have anything to prove.
493
00:38:34,250 --> 00:38:35,550
You know how I know?
494
00:38:37,750 --> 00:38:39,290
Because I'm a woman.
495
00:38:46,510 --> 00:38:47,510
Over here!
496
00:38:48,330 --> 00:38:50,190
Oh! Oh, Lord!
497
00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:12,180
My queen, I have a necklace of real
acorns for you to wear.
498
00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:21,800
If you have great need, I promise you, a
silver acorn will not fail you.
499
00:39:22,780 --> 00:39:24,200
No, I'll wear this one.
500
00:39:24,420 --> 00:39:25,420
Yes, my queen.
501
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:30,460
It is nearly high twelve.
502
00:39:34,140 --> 00:39:35,140
I'm ready.
503
00:39:58,160 --> 00:39:59,660
I hope Alvar will be harder.
504
00:40:01,320 --> 00:40:03,160
I found this paperweight on Mother's
stairs.
505
00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:15,240
Alvar, do you really think this is
necessary?
506
00:40:18,540 --> 00:40:19,560
This is my show.
507
00:40:20,460 --> 00:40:21,460
I'd like to handle it.
508
00:40:28,940 --> 00:40:29,940
Anytime you're ready.
509
00:40:30,960 --> 00:40:32,000
How about right now?
510
00:40:43,960 --> 00:40:47,160
Come on now. That's good. Come on.
That's it. Oh, that was good. Come on.
511
00:40:47,160 --> 00:40:48,160
on.
512
00:40:49,440 --> 00:40:50,379
Come on.
513
00:40:50,380 --> 00:40:51,380
That's it.
514
00:40:53,660 --> 00:40:54,660
Whoa!
515
00:40:58,460 --> 00:41:01,060
A little coat. Watch out. Watch it now.
516
00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:04,080
Hey,
517
00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:10,920
wait. Don't hit me.
518
00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:13,180
Come on. Put one right here. Come on.
519
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:15,980
Put one right here. That's it.
520
00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:17,200
Come on.
521
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:19,400
Hit me right here. That's it.
522
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:54,800
Are you all right?
523
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:56,400
Go on without me.
524
00:41:56,680 --> 00:41:57,538
No, no.
525
00:41:57,540 --> 00:41:58,560
We're leaving here together.
526
00:41:59,720 --> 00:42:00,720
Oh,
527
00:42:03,460 --> 00:42:06,480
Mr. Walt must have said it. Who?
528
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:08,180
Never mind. Just get in the car.
529
00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:11,680
Take us to the cove, would you please?
Hurry.
530
00:42:31,720 --> 00:42:32,720
news.
531
00:43:01,420 --> 00:43:03,620
Laurel, queen of the Druids.
532
00:43:04,900 --> 00:43:07,300
Laurel, queen of the Druids.
533
00:43:08,140 --> 00:43:09,740
Laurel, bride to Carnute.
534
00:43:11,020 --> 00:43:13,420
Laurel, bride to Carnute.
535
00:43:21,920 --> 00:43:25,800
Oh, great Carnute, the years of waiting
are over.
536
00:43:26,160 --> 00:43:28,980
Your children and your bride bid you
welcome.
537
00:43:30,440 --> 00:43:31,440
Kynute.
538
00:43:31,980 --> 00:43:33,160
Kynute.
539
00:43:33,860 --> 00:43:36,920
Kynute. Kynute. Kynute. Kynute.
540
00:44:10,670 --> 00:44:12,890
A silver egg will not save you.
541
00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:31,700
It's over, Miss Vandell.
542
00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:34,300
Your fantasy has ended.
543
00:45:54,920 --> 00:45:55,920
Your Majesty.
544
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:57,860
I guess I deserve that, Mr. Bush.
545
00:45:58,570 --> 00:46:01,110
Oh, but I'm not mocking you, Miss Van
Dale, no.
546
00:46:02,170 --> 00:46:06,470
When you were faced with the ultimate
challenge, you were most regal indeed.
547
00:46:08,370 --> 00:46:09,370
Thank you.
548
00:46:11,770 --> 00:46:13,390
Did it all really happen?
549
00:46:13,830 --> 00:46:19,170
Who is to say what is truly real and
what is fantasy, Miss Van Dale?
550
00:46:19,770 --> 00:46:23,850
However, some things are very real
indeed.
551
00:46:25,910 --> 00:46:27,470
Paul! Laura? Oh!
552
00:46:31,500 --> 00:46:33,540
Paul is a researcher at a university.
553
00:46:34,060 --> 00:46:35,520
He studied the druids.
554
00:46:36,460 --> 00:46:37,720
I have a new research program.
555
00:46:38,180 --> 00:46:39,500
How to woo a queen.
556
00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:40,840
Oh.
557
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:43,300
I made you this present.
558
00:46:44,100 --> 00:46:45,100
This one, too.
559
00:46:45,260 --> 00:46:47,740
Oh, thank you. Thank you both.
560
00:46:48,100 --> 00:46:49,100
Are you going to wear it?
561
00:46:49,460 --> 00:46:53,200
No way. I'm going to find me a knight's
house and I'm going to hang some of this
562
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:54,200
over every doorway.
563
00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:55,440
Thank you.
564
00:46:55,460 --> 00:46:57,640
Goodbye, Miss Vandell. Goodbye, sir.
Bye.
565
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:20,280
Mr. Rourke, I want to thank you for a
wonderful fantasy.
566
00:47:20,560 --> 00:47:23,580
More importantly, for a wonderful wife.
567
00:47:23,980 --> 00:47:25,880
The wedding you arranged was lovely.
568
00:47:26,220 --> 00:47:27,320
It was my pleasure.
569
00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:28,900
My best wishes.
570
00:47:29,540 --> 00:47:31,460
Thank you both. Goodbye, sir. Goodbye.
571
00:47:40,920 --> 00:47:43,540
Well, I bet the contestant is plenty
mad.
572
00:47:43,920 --> 00:47:45,360
Why not ask her yourself?
573
00:47:47,500 --> 00:47:49,380
I'm not angry, Tatu, no.
574
00:47:50,780 --> 00:47:51,780
I'm grateful.
575
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:56,320
I may not be the greatest mother in the
world, but I love my daughter.
576
00:47:56,780 --> 00:47:57,780
Indeed.
577
00:47:58,000 --> 00:48:00,760
You see, Tatu, the Contessa also had a
fantasy.
578
00:48:01,080 --> 00:48:05,700
To have her daughter meet someone who
would love her for herself, not her
579
00:48:07,300 --> 00:48:12,600
Yeah, and now that that's settled, I
just might give up my harem.
580
00:48:15,180 --> 00:48:17,760
To spend one evening alone with you.
581
00:48:18,860 --> 00:48:20,860
Perhaps some other time, Contessa.
582
00:48:22,020 --> 00:48:23,440
Some other time.
43945
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