All language subtitles for fantasy_island_s03e02_goose_for_the_gander_-_the_stuntman

Good morning, boss.

Oh, you look so great. You look so
fantastic.

Thank you.

The boutonniere, may I ask what it's
for?

Oh, the boutonniere is for you, boss.

There you are.

You're going to look smashing.

There you are. Oh, you look fantastic.

Really beautiful.

Can I do anything for you, boss?

Anything else?

Tattoo, why am I suspicious?

Suspicious? You?

Well, gosh, boss, I don't know.

Perhaps it is because you seem to be
trying to kill me with all this

And that usually means something is
definitely wrong.

Wrong?

Oh, here comes the rover.

Well, boss, we don't want to be late.
Let's go.

Wait, boss.

Oh, hold it.

Tattoo. Hey, boss. We don't want our
guests to be waiting.

Come on, let's go.

There you are.

Are you all right, boss?

Yes.

Smiles, everyone, smiles.

Ah, Mr.

and Mrs. Peter Rawlings from Hollywood,
California.

Hollywood? Yes.

Are they famous movie star or something?

Or something.

Yes, you see, while Mr. Rawlins isn't
exactly famous, you have seen him in

of your favorite movies and didn't know
it.

I didn't? You didn't. You see, for the
past 23 years before his retirement, Mr.

Rawlins was Hollywood's premier
stuntman.

What's his fantasy, boss?

Mrs. Rawlins believes they are here so
Mr. Rawlins can be reunited with his

who is currently one of Hollywood's top
stuntmen. You see, after a bitter

argument... Father and son haven't
spoken in the last five years.

But there is something more.

Something that Mr. Rollins didn't tell
his wife.

Oh, indeed it is. You see, Mr.

Rollins' real fantasy is to save his
son's life.

His son's life? Is he in danger?

Mr. Rollins thinks so.

You see, he feels that his son has never
stopped competing with the legend Mr.

Rollins left behind.

With each picture, his stunts become
more dangerous, more daring.

Until now, Mr. Rawlings has stayed on
the sidelines and remained silent.

Until now? What will happen now?

Mrs. Marjorie Gibbs, all the way from
Santa Fe, New Mexico, where she operates

the Ace Truck Stop Fast Food Grill.

Mrs. Gibbs' fantasy is to compete in and
win the Fantasy Island Grand Cuisine

and Cookery Contest.

Yes.

Well, you see, a new freeway bypassed
her establishment.

So all of her old customers, the long
-haul truckers on Highway 5, have

contributed money to send her here. Mrs.
Gibbs hopes that winning our cookery

contest will give her the money to
relocate her restaurant on the new

Some of the most famous chefs in the
world are here for her contest.

How does she hope to win?

My dear guests, I am Mr. Rourke, your
host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

Look, there's Bill.

Print!

Print!

Hey, made you look like a million
dollars.

A cakewalk! You guys all right? No. Hank
might have broke his arm.

Oh, come on. He's a tough old boy.

Bill, I told you somebody'd get hurt.

Somebody saw a pipe, Paul.

Well,

I see retirement agrees with you both.
You look like an ad for a health spa.

Did you ever consider getting off your
royal duff and getting back into

Hi, Mom.

Oh, Billy.

You look great. Excuse me. Hey, Jim, I
got a small problem on the next gag.

Billy,

aren't you going to say hello to your
father?

Hi, Pete.

Like I said, Jim, I've got a problem
setting up the next stunt.

Cleve Mitchell was going to take the
fall, right? He was supposed to be in on

last night's plane, only he missed
connections, and now I'm one man short.

It's okay with you. I'd like Butch to
take that fall.

I thought Butch was going to be your
safety man in case you had a problem.

I'm not going to have a problem.

Besides, this will be a more spectacular
stunt.

Perhaps Mr. Rollins could fill in.

What? No way.

Aren't you letting your personal
feelings interfere with your judgment,

Rollins? But it hasn't worked in five
years.

Still in pretty good shape. I can handle
it.

I said no way.

I'm the stunt coordinator, and I said
no.

Bill, I am sorry to pull rank on you,
but you know the kind of schedule that

we've got.

And I just can't afford to lose any more
men.

Now, you're the stunt coordinator, and
you call all the shots.

But let's let your dad fill in on this
one.

Get yourself to wardrobe, get outfitted,
and meet me at the cliffs.

Pete!

What are you doing?

It's all right.

I can handle it.

And it might give Father and Son the
opportunity to view each other from a

somewhat different perspective, Mrs.
Rawlings.

Exactly.

You go on, Mr. Rourke, honey. Don't
worry about anything.

I'll see you after we wrap.

Mr. Rourke, my fantasy was for a father
and son reunion, not for a twin

funeral.

Thank you for it. You're welcome.

Oh, my goodness.

Look at all that beautiful food.

Yes, it is rather impressive, isn't it?
Oh, yes. Ah, Mr. Lang, so nice to see

you again. Mr.

Joe Lang, this is Mrs.

Marjorie Gibbs, one of your competitors.

Charmed, I'm sure.

Likewise.

We're going to have a very tasty
fantasy.

Oh, I would say so, yes.

We have the super star of the gourmet
world.

But does that mean that I don't have a
prayer?

Oh, Mrs. Gibbs, where is your faith?

This is Fantasy Island.

I wouldn't have agreed to your fantasy
if you didn't have a chance.

However, as the two said, they are the
best chefs in the world.

Carlo Franconi from Italy.

Michael Gabor from Budapest.

Oh, look at that.

Yes.

Antoine de Beauvais.

One of the great chefs of France.

Isn't that so, Fatou? Oh, yes, but... At
least he was.

His famed Paris restaurant, Chez
Antoine, was recently demoted from three

to one on the gourmet guide.

You might be wary of him, Mrs. Gibbs. It
is said he is a desperate man. He can

only regain his reputation by winning
this weekend here.

Well, I'm not afraid of competition.

Not too much.

That's the right attitude.

Now, the grading will be continued under
the direction of our chief judge,

Georges Bouffetout, the world -famed
authority on haute cuisine.

Come, let me introduce you.

A bit thin on the belt, mon dieu.

Georges?

Georges Bouffetout? Mon ami, votre
placer.

I didn't know that you were going to do
the judging.

Well, you'd be hard -pressed on this
one, old boy. You've only one star left

lose. After this, it's running one of
those junk food franchises that are so

infesting the colonies, what?

Oh, look how cute we are.

She's too cute to cook.

I'm not going to cook it.

Idiot.

Voilà. La pièce de résistance.

Fresh pâté.

Super knife for a goose.

And she's a girl.

Great heavens. Who's this, the scullery
witch?

Mr. Bouffetou, may I introduce our last
contestants?

Must you?

Mrs. Marjorie Gibbs and Mr. Joe Lang.

Charmed, I'm sure.

I am certain our new contestants would
like to see the kitchen.

Tatou, will you show the way?

This way, please.

It's your fork.

Really, Roark, if these two oddities
give me Tomein, I shall sue you for this

entire island.

I am certain that will not be necessary,
Mr. Bouffetou. Well, could you simply

tell these peasants that Pate is Goose
Liver and not the silly bird's name?

Somehow I got the impression they
wouldn't like to know.

Let's wreck something.

The world's oldest semi -living stuff,
man.

Thought they'd have you stuffed and
hanging in the museum. But now, how are

snuff? I'm doing better than out of year
here. Maybe you can talk some sense

into a boy wonder.

Yeah.

Listening to me was never one of that
boy's strong points.

But I appreciate your telegram.

Well, you know, I figured somebody's got
to talk to him or else he's going to

get himself killed.

What's the one you think he'll buy it
on?

Good guys in one boat chase the bad guys
in the other. Played by two dummies.

One is a department store mannequin and
the other one is your kid.

We get going about 50, 60 miles an hour.
Take a couple shots at him. Billy takes

a hit.

Veers off, goes up a ramp.

Explodes through a fuel storage hut.

Lands on the other side in a big ball of
flames.

And he's got the switch triggered in
the...

The boat which sets off the charges in
the hut.

You're going to need a full burn suit
for that, all right.

Yeah. Airtight, sealed, a minute and a
half air bottle.

He's also got fire extinguishers in the
boat. Put out the fire when he lands.

Great stunt, though.

Almost ingenious.

I agree with you, it's far too
dangerous.

If he doesn't blow himself up, he'll
suffocate.

We're calling it Rollins' Folly.

Or suicide.

Well, anyway, I'd never cooked for
anybody but my husband, Matt.

Oh, he just loved good food.

So when he passed away, I started up the
grill. I do something to, you know,

fight the loneliness.

Yeah, helps keep you busy.

Oh, yeah.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, you've got a little smudge there
right now.

So you own your own place, huh?

Well, not for too much longer, I guess.

I don't have much chance against all the
pros around here. People like you.

I'm nothing.

I run an all -night joint in Trenton,
New Jersey called the Pleasure Pallet.

I sort of specialize in my own spare
rib.

Yeah. Anyway, the guys like what I dish
out, so they took up a collection to

enter me in the contest.

Fat chance against the French flesh over
there.

like that. What's the matter with her?

Matter?

Nothing is the matter with the goose,
monsieur.

Just what you see, that is all.

Come on, come on. Well, maybe she's not
hungry. Yes, but when she's not hungry,

that's... I'm surrounded by imbeciles.

Out of my closet. Into your area. Into
your area. Allez, allez.

Come, chérie. Allez.

Open your mouth.

Come on, a little bit more. Come on. You
like it, yes.

Yes, you don't say no. Open your mouth.
Allez, allez.

Any man that wants to play nursemaid to
a goose can't be all bad.

Yes, Mr. Bessler, I am certain we can
fulfill your fantasy.

Yes, uh -huh.

How many mermaids?

How many?

Well, that's more than I anticipated,
but...

I'm sure we can accommodate you, yes.

When do you wish to experience your
fantasy, Mr. Bessler?

Well, let me check my calendar. Just one
moment, please.

Yes.

Yes, I think those dates will work out
very satisfactorily.

Uh -huh.

Yes.

How many will there be in your party?

Mr. Bessler, something unexpected has
come up. May I call you back in a few

minutes? Thank you.

Tattoo. Boss.

Precisely, what is going on here?

I'm just trying to light your pipe,
boss.

I haven't smoked a pipe in years.

All right, out with it.

Just why are you trying so desperately
to kill me with kindness?

Oh, I'm just trying to earn my keep,
boss.

Well, then I will appreciate it very
much if you earn your keep in some other

less distracting way.

Hmm? Do you understand?

Yes, boss.

Good, Tattoo, good.

You go.

Down. Cut for it.

All right, let's get the stunt doubles
over here, Bill.

Look, if you think I'm going to do that
explosion gag tomorrow, you're crazy.

Well, good. Fine.

While you're at it, why don't you go
pick up your paycheck and take a hike?

Bill, Pete, you guys ready?

Yeah, come on. This is where you earn
your money.

Done this game many times.

What's next?

You may be sorry you asked.

Look, I've been thinking.

Maybe you ought to quit before
something... Well, you know, things can

and... Well, you're no kid.

Since when are you concerned with other
people's health?

You're going to make that same speech to
the fellas who are going to drive that

boat through that inferno tomorrow?

Listen, that's my gag, so you leave it
alone.

I even had them write it into the script
before I agreed to do this picture.

It's the one stunt that's going to set
me apart from the rest of you.

The rest of you.

You mean me?

You think it's the one gag that'll
finally erase the legend of your old

You'd drive a boat through the fires of
hell to do that, wouldn't you?

I think it's done. Let's try.

What's cooking, good -looking?

Well, I'm just testing out my spinach
pie recipe.

I'll cut you both a piece if you'd like.

No, no, that's not fair. I shouldn't
taste your entree.

Oh, go on.

Try it.

You'll love it.

Wow,

this is great.

My own secret recipe.

I guess that's the best thing I have
ever tasted.

But if you want the recipe, it's right
over there on the table.

Not before the judging.

Maybe later when it's over.

Something wrong?

Oh, no.

I was just thinking.

It's the first time I've been
comfortable with any man since Matt

I feel real comfortable, too.

How would you like to take a walk by the
lagoon?

Sure. Lead the way.

See you later, Captain.

Have fun.

Delicious.

That is a leopard.

Can you not read English?

You have no right to be here. This is a
gastronomic carpet secret.

Sorry, but you will have to go a long
way to beat this.

Have a bite.

What is this?

An insult to Antoine? I will not even
feed it to my goose to make him fit.

is this?

This is a concoction. This is a
concoction.

Good luck with the contest, mon ami.

You're going to need it.

Antoine must win.

Antoine must have that recipe.

A spinach pie, yes.

Half a cup of breadcrumbs. But of
course, of course, this will win Antoine

four -star rating that he needs.

Ah, yes, of course.

Hey, what's this really all about?

I mean, what was the real reason that
you came to Fantasy Island?

Was it to be reunited with Bill?

Or was the real reason that you wanted
to pick up where you left off five years

ago?

Continue your insane version of Russian
roulette.

Honey, I love you, but you're no kid.

And you've got to realize that your
career is over and that Bill is the

The best.

Craziest, perhaps, but being the best
entails a responsibility.

All he cares about is being better than
his old man.

Half the stuntmen in Hollywood won't
work with him. Three more to quit today.

Pete, it may sound selfish, but I really
don't care that much about those other

men.

I care about my husband and my son.

And I don't want to see either one of
them hurt or killed.

I want us to be a family again.

We will be.

But on this one, you're just going to
have to trust me.

But where would my spin... Spinach pie
recipe B.

Think, Marge. Where did you last see it?

It was right here on this table.

Oh, here you are.

I've been looking for you all over the
place.

Antoine has changed his menu at the last
minute.

You better read it.

Look.

Does that mean what I think it means?

It does if you think that it means
spinach pie.

Antoine stole your recipe.

He's not going to get away with this.

I'm afraid it's too late. He already has
entered it at his own. And that means

that no one can use his recipe.

You mean I can't enter my spinach pie?

I'm sorry.

You said Patty was on the menu.

Not exactly.

Only her liver.

Her liver?

It's not Patty.

It's paté.

You see, to make paté de foie gras,
first you take a goose.

And you make her liver grow big.

And then you kill her.

And then you serve her liver.

And that's what you call paté de foie
gras. Over my dead body. He may have

stolen my recipe, but he's not going to
touch Patty.

Oh, I don't care who she is.

Oh, poor baby.

Oh, Antoine's not going to touch a hair
of your head.

Actually, it's feathers.

She looks green around the gills. Let's
get her out of here.

My ducks, my ducks!

I find you in the kitchen. My friend, it
is of no use. No, no, no. My goose, she

is cooked.

Well, that's not unusual in a cookery
contest.

No, you do not understand. I don't mean
cooked. Cooked, I mean cooked. Gone.

They stole my goose.

But Antoine, he's never ruined. No.

Because I have another hole up my
sleeve.

Antoine will have his revenge, monsieur.

Ah, yes.

Ah, yes.

Well, Tato, it's...

It seems what is sauce for the goose is
sauce for the gander.

Morning.

Morning, Jim.

I had a visit from two of the stuntmen
this morning. They wanted me to know

the stuntmen got together and took a
vote last night.

About a minute.

They want me to replace him as stunt
coordinator.

Gonna buck like a bronco, you know that.

Yeah, well, there's one more thing.

They want you to replace him.

Jim!

There is a rumor that you're pulling me
off this picture.

Well?

Listen, Bill, great stuntmen don't
necessarily make great stunt

Besides, I'm nine days behind schedule
and I can't afford any more delays.

So let me guess.

You asked him to take over, right? Yeah,
that's right.

But you can stay on and work with him if
you like.

I'd sooner be dead.

Sorry about your kid, Pete.

About to happen.

Now we can relax, forget about Rollins'
folly, and finish this picture.

The stunt will be on, snuff.

Kidding.

You're not.

The stunt will be on. We'll do it first
thing in the morning.

I'll be in the lead boat.

In case you'll be in the second boat.

Get everything ready and I'll see you
there.

You're crazy.

You said it was suicide. Now what in the
hell are you trying to prove?

Maybe I'm trying to prove I'm a father.

She looks better, don't you think?

Yeah.

But she still looks green around the
quills.

Ah, there you are, my friends. Don't you
know that a contest is about to be

decided?

We're both withdrawing, Mr. Rock.

Withdrawing?

Well, are you convinced that it's the
proper thing to do?

What would your customers at the
Pleasure Pallet think of a man who quits

they paid your entry fee with their own
hard -earned money, Mr. Lang?

Oh, yes, right.

Just because I'm out of the contest
doesn't mean you have to be.

Mr. Lang?

We'll try it on one condition.

What is that?

If you keep Patty safe, and we can be
entered as a team,

it's a deal.

Ladies and gentlemen, the surprise
you've all been waiting for, spinach pie

Alain -Coin de Beauvray.

Boss, that's it. The dirty rat. He stole
my recipe.

And two.

And two.

Look at it, boss.

The fish is on.

Bravo, Antoine.

A canvas of plastic beauty.

Oh, I'm satisfied.

No matter what comes now, I've tasted of
the garden of paradise.

Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your
attention, please? A last -minute

announcement. Our contestants, Mrs.
Gibbs and Mr. Lang, have combined their

talents and are now entered as a team.

The blacks. Thank you.

Enjoy. Enjoy, sir.

Spare ribs a la Joe and Mark.

They must be joking.

This looks like the leftovers from a
cannibal tribe's leftovers.

Anyway, I've already had several full
meals. Perhaps you should try a small

taste. You wouldn't want to embarrass
them in front of all these people.

They are, after all, the final
contestants.

Very well, Rock. My stomach will be on
your head.

Ladies and gentlemen, there hardly is
any dissent. The winner of the Fantasy

Island Grand Cuisine and Cookery Contest
is the team of Mrs. Gibbs and Mr. Lamb.

Shove him!

Shove him!

Destroy my goose!

At one clench, foul!

Foul? Yes! You got a lot of nerve after
what you did.

What you do not understand, monsieur, is
if I could have won, it would have

meant everything to what one.

If I could have won, I could have saved
my restaurant.

At once, papa was the founder of the
restaurant.

And so, but neither of you...

So you think that's fancy.

Mr. Rourke, I'd like to know what's
going on here.

Mr. Rollins, I assure you I had nothing
to do with your losing your job.

As for your stunt... I put a lot of time
into that stunt.

I have visualized every millisecond of
how I'm going to do that stunt a

times. I know everything that'll happen.
I know everything that can go wrong.

And I'm telling you, he can't do it, Mr.
Rourke. He'll get killed.

Well, why are you telling me?

Why don't you tell your father?

Are you kidding? He wouldn't listen to
me.

The same way you wouldn't listen to what
he was trying to tell you five years

ago.

What?

What are you talking about? Isn't it
possible that you have misunderstood

father's motives all along?

No, no, please, please, let me finish.

Let me finish.

That maybe as far as he was concerned,
there never was any competition between

the two of you.

That he was trying the only way he knew
how.

To do what every loving father tries to
do. To give his son the benefit.

Of his experience.

To teach him his limitations.

Yes, Mr. Rawlins.

To help him mold his future.

Your father believes that if you try
your stunt, you won't have any future.

Well, if he thinks that it'd kill me,
what makes him think he can live through

it? Perhaps he doesn't.

But maybe he feels it's the only way to
make you understand. To make you stop

competing with his legend.

That's crazy.

Why? I think the word is love.

This is too close. We're going to have
to take it back.

Pete, this is suicidal.

Talk Jim Heston into dropping the stunt
or at least modifying it.

It's too late, Norma.

Now it's something I've got to do.

Pete, please.

Pete, I don't want you to do the stunt.

It's too dangerous, and now that I've
had a chance to analyze it, I don't

it can be done.

And I don't think I understand.

Well, let's just say that I understand
now what you've been trying to show me

all these years.

What do you say? Can I tell Jim the
stunt's off?

No.

No, I never signed up for a stunt I
didn't try, son.

But now that we have a chance to be
honest with each other, I gotta agree

you. I don't think I can do it either.

I think we both agree that this gag is
suicide for one man. But now think about

two.

One drives, the other sets off the
charges, and activates the fire

when we hit the water.

It can be done.

It is still too dangerous.

No, Mom, we can do it.

We really can, honey.

Besides, uh...

We never signed on for a stunt. We
didn't try.

Give us a go ahead when you're ready,
Pete.

You got it, snub.

Good luck, partner.

Okay, roll the cameras.

Got speed.

Pete and Bill, it's all yours.

Let's go, Bart, son.

Get that backup boat in there right
away.

You all right, son?

Oh, yeah.

There, we did it. We're the best.

We're number one.

Well, I hope your stay was a blessing.
Oh, it certainly was, Mr. Rook.

Yes, yes. Two fantasies for the price of
one.

Two fantasies?

Yeah, I've always wanted to participate
in one of those pie -throwing fights.

Me too.

Oh, and I would say that Patty's health
seems much improved.

Yes, and I'm keeping her on a strict no
-junk -food diet.

If you ever get up to Trenton, New
Jersey, will you look us up?

We will, we will.

Well, have a pleasant journey.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Hello. What a pleasant sight. Good to
see you all reunited.

You know, it feels good, too, now that
Dad and I have bridged the communication

gap. Mr. Rollins, what are you going to
do? Are you going to go back to stunt

work? No.

I don't think so, Dad, too.

Matter of fact, Bill and I are talking
about opening up a stunt school.

I can see it all now.

Rollins, son.

I don't know. Maybe Rollins and the
father, huh? Oh, come on, Newton.

Thank you so much, Mr. Rawlins. You're
very welcome, Mr. Rawlins. Mr.

Rawlins.

Thank you. Goodbye.

Goodbye, Mr. Rawlins.

Boss,

you know what?

You're really the traitor.

Really, Tatum?

In what way?

In every way, boss.

You make so many people so happy.

Well, that's the business I'm in.

But you do it so well.

Well.

Uh -oh.

What's wrong?

Nothing that I cannot fix. Wait.

Thank you.

All right, boss.

Put your foot there.

Getting suspicious again.

Boss, stand still.

I'm going to make your shoes look like
they were new.

All right, Atu, this is it.

I insist that you explain why you are
still attempting to kill me with

You pinned a boutonniere on me, brought
my slippers, tried to light my pipe,

which I no longer smoke, feather dusted
me, shined my shoes, and I don't know

what all. Why, why, why?

Boss, don't you get it?

No, I most certainly do not get it.

Well, it's because of this newspaper
article.

The idea put in it.

Read it.

Wanted assistant manager.

Tattoo. Yes, boss?

Tattoo, did you think... Oh, now that's
impossible.

That's all right, boss.

Say it. I can take it.

Tattoo. Are you under the impression
that I was planning to... Fire me?

what you wanted to do?

Now, listen to me, Tattoo. Now, listen.
It is true that I placed an ad for an

assistant manager. Now, that's true. But
it was for the hotel.

Hotel? Yes.

You mean you're not going to fire me?

The day I fire you, my dear Tattoo, will
be the day that birds no longer fly.