Original subtitles

Good morning, Mr. Brock. Good morning, Lawrence.

Smiles, everyone.

Smiles.

That must be Mrs. Sheila McKenna. But why does she look so sad?

She's both sad and angry, Lawrence. Which is why her fantasy is to start a

life with a new man.

Was she having trouble with the old one?

Unfortunately, that's precisely the problem.

After many years of marriage, Mrs. McKenna has found out that her husband

been unfaithful.

And so she divorced him?

Not yet, Lawrence. Not quite yet.

But that certainly is her intention.

Mr. Jack Palmer and his wife, Roxanne.

The gentleman, I believe, sir, is a certified public accountant from

Wales. Yes, Lawrence. And for a man with such a sedentary occupation, Mr. Palmer

has asked for a most dangerous fantasy.

You're familiar with the name Dick Turpin, of course.

The famous highwayman? Why, every schoolboy knows Dick Turpin.

In the 1700s, the name Dick Turpin sent a chill down the spine of every

constable in England.

And his fantasy is to go back and beat that notorious rogue?

No, Lawrence.

His fantasy is to be that notorious rogue himself.

Can you do that?

That's the easy part, Lawrence.

Mr. Palmer's living through the experience. That will be the difficult

My dear guests, I am Mr. Rourke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

I just love my bungalow, Mr. Roark.

Did you know I design interiors? Oh, yes. I believe you began your interior

design firm ten years ago, just before your marriage.

Before I made the biggest mistake of my life.

Mr. McKenna, I know how painful breaking up a marriage can be, but please, try

to relax.

That's how I got into this mess.

I was too relaxed, too trusting.

Every time I think of that two -timing louse enjoying a cozy weekend in Aspen,

Colorado with some little cutie just sends me right up the wall.

Uh, Mrs. McKenna, does your husband know you're here?

No.

Only Margot, my best friend, knows about this.

Then Mrs. McKenna is not aware of your intentions.

Who cares?

I left him a note saying that I was leaving him. He's getting the same

consideration that he gave me.

You haven't settled anything with your husband, and yet your fantasy is to

a new life with a new man.

It sounds very much like revenge to me.

So what?

Well, the question I'm trying to raise is this. Will you like yourself if you

through with this merely on the basis of revenge?

Everybody else is doing anything and everything they want and keeping their

-respect.

I'm going to learn how to be like them.

Isn't that part of the new wave?

It's a very old wave, Mrs. McKenna, and a very sad one.

I'm a big girl, Mr. Rourke. I can take care of myself.

Sheila, you just can't run out on me. I mean, we've got ten years of marriage on

the line, baby. It's a little late to start thinking about that. Please, Mr.

McKenna, Mrs. McKenna, if you talk quietly, perhaps, or long.

No, no way.

Thank you.

What did she tell you?

Other than that you had an extramarital affair and are, as she put it, a two

-timing louse, absolutely nothing.

And naturally you took her word for that, didn't you?

Mr. McKenna, when someone requests a fantasy, it's necessary to check their

background very carefully, including the background of those nearest to them,

you understand?

Meaning you know the truth. Of course.

And if you truly love your wife and want her back, I suggest you do a little

soul -searching, Mr. McKenna, before you talk to her again.

I know every word that was ever written about Dick Turpin, Mr. Rowe.

Like this poem.

Over the cobbles he clattered and clashed in the dark inn yard.

He tapped with his whip on the shutters, but all was locked and barred.

Yes, Mr. Palmer, I know the poem.

The wind was a torrent of darkness among the gusty trees. The moon was a ghostly

galley untossed upon cloudy seas.

The road was a ribbon of moonlight over the purple moor, and the highwayman came

riding. Riding.

Riding. Up to that old inn door.

Sorry, sir.

That's very good, Lawrence.

Yes, Mr. Palmer, I'm very familiar with Dick Turpin. After all, he's your

fantasy.

Jack, I'm afraid for you. I don't want you hurt.

I also know that if I try to stop you from doing this, you'll never forgive

There is danger, Mr. Palmer.

There is danger.

Dick Turpin lived outside the law.

A haunted man.

Well, of course there's danger. I mean, danger was Dick Turpin's middle name.

Do you know what my middle name is?

Dull. Still better dull than dead, sir.

All too true, Lawrence.

Mrs. Palmer, if you truly object... He has to do this, Mr. Rourke.

For both our sakes.

Very well, then.

If you both return in, say, half an hour, your fantasy will begin, Mr.

Thank you. You're very welcome, sir. Goodbye, Mr. Rourke. Mrs. Palmer.

May I say you look lovely, madam? If a little lonesome.

Thank you, Lauren.

I intend to do something about the lonesome part.

I suggest this plan of yours just doesn't seem your style at all.

You're exactly right, Lauren.

But it will be.

Sheila!

What are you doing here?

Hello. I'm looking for your husband. He took off so fast after he got that Dear

John letter of yours that he forgot to leave me the vinyl papers on that

property sale in Aspen. Then you know all about Franken.

I'm sorry about the two of you splitting up.

I hope that you know that I'm here for you whenever you want.

Thanks.

I'm glad I found you when I did. It's not good for a woman in your position to

be alone right now.

What do you mean, my position?

On the rebound.

Every man in the place, they'll be on you like a wet T -shirt.

And you're going to protect me from these animals, is that it?

Look, Sheila, you know that I've always felt, well, something special for you.

Special, huh?

And I always thought you were just trying to be a nice guy.

Frank?

Now I know why you two are such good friends.

You're both alike.

What'd you say to her, Norman?

Nothing. Well, you didn't tell her it was Margot, did you?

I mean, if she knew it was her best friend that I'd spent that time with in

Aspen, she knew. I don't want to get in the middle of that.

Okay?

Ah, Mr. and Mrs. Palmer.

Come in, please. Come in.

Right on time.

Lawrence?

Lawrence, will you please?

Oh, yes, sir.

Mr. Rook, all my life I've wanted this fantasy.

Oh, I know.

Thank you, Lawrence.

It is said that this once belonged to...

Dick Turpin.

He could stand you in good stead, sir.

This belonged to Dick Turpin.

Now, are you ready? I've never been so ready for anything in all my life. Good.

This way, please.

Roxy, isn't this... Where did she go?

Have no fear, Mr. Palmer.

You will see your wife again very soon.

However, she won't recognize you. You mean she's part of my fantasy?

Do you suggest your wife stay behind during all this?

But... Because I can cancel your fantasy.

No, no.

But it'll be all right, though, won't it?

There will be certain complications in your relationship which you will soon

discover.

Now, concentrate on the poem you were quoting earlier, Mr. Palmer.

Concentrate on the highwayman.

He the French got tapped on his forehead.

A bunch of lace at his chin.

A coat of claret velvet.

And breeches of brown toe skin.

It's big time. It's great.

to see you. Oh, I thought you might need a shoulder, you know.

No, I'm doing just fine.

I know you must be brokenhearted.

Now, tell me how you really feel. Is it really over with you and Frank, or are

you just playing hardball?

Yes, it is over. And yes, I am playing hardball. If you need any tips about how

to play the game, remember, I'm an expert.

You don't know what it feels like.

Be betrayed by somebody that you've loved and talked to.

You need a drink.

Yeah, we both do.

Oh, got a cigarette? In my purse, maybe.

Two drinks coming up.

Something wrong?

This is the same hotel that Frank stayed in.

Really? It was you. You know me better than that. It bothered me, but I

figure it out. All those long, lingering looks at Frank and the expensive

presents that you used to buy him. Oh, come on. I gave you presents, too, for

crying out loud.

No, no, no. It was you.

And that's why you're here.

It's not to console me.

You just want to make sure that I don't take Frank back.

Sheila, you have got me all wrong.

Not anymore, I don't.

Dickie, you're late. The coach is about to arrive.

Who are you?

I did what you asked me to.

Wait a minute.

Here it is.

Let's go.

Halt. Stand and deliver.

Hand over your jewels.

You'll hang for this. Silence. Deliver.

I'm willing to deliver.

Audrey!

Just a thought, dear. Driver, on your way.

All right, come on, let's go rescue Roxanne.

Hey, just a minute, who are you anyway?

How do you know about Roxanne?

Dickie, there you go again, teasing your old friend Donald King, when it was you

yourself who told me to find where Roxanne was being held. Held?

Come on, man, let's go.

You look... Terrific.

Ah, well, from now on, I intend to feel terrific, too.

I think I like what you're saying.

Norm, you knew that Margot was with Frank and Aspen, didn't you?

He didn't think you knew. He made me promise to keep my mouth shut.

Thanks. I wasn't positive until this moment.

I just wanted to make sure I was right.

And now, how about us?

Are we friends, too?

I'd like it if we were a lot more than that.

Shall we?

Looks like Sheila's getting even, Frank.

Thanks to you for following me to Aspen, yeah.

I don't remember having to twist your arm once I got there.

Look, Sheila, I can explain... No, don't sweat it, Frank.

There's just something that I forgot to give to Margo.

Now I'm ready.

Look, I don't think maybe this is the right time for this. I mean, after all,

is my friend.

Yeah, well, Margo is my friend, too.

Now, let's go do what friends do to each other.

Come on.

Come on.

I'll go nowhere with you, Dick Turpin, until I know what you're up to.

Roxy, it's me.

It's me. Hurry. I'm going to run to you. I want to get you home. Stay away from

me.

If I were you, I'd fight with her later.

What?

Not until I know your existence.

My intention is to save your bloody life.

You're not cooperating?

Well, I'm out of practice, I guess.

Sure. Well, we've got all night.

No, you don't.

Get out of here.

Like hell.

You tell my wife.

That didn't stop you from going to bed with my best friend, did it?

I made a mistake. I'm sorry.

Sure. Until the next time.

There won't be any next time, Sheila.

I love you.

I always have and I always will.

Just get out of here, Frank.

Out of my life, and I mean it.

Where's that drink you gave me?

I drank it.

Well, pour me another one.

All gone.

Look, Sheila.

Maybe this whole thing isn't such a good idea. I mean...

After all... Well, I think you're right.

I guess I'm not cut out to be much of a swinger, am I?

Face it, darling. You're not going to be much good to yourself or anybody else.

To your refrain.

I'm sorry. I guess you'd better go now.

I guess you're right.

Sheila,

this is my bungalow.

want to make it our bungalow.

I'll be waiting. Thanks, Norm.

You never know.

Well, I've worked myself up an appetite here.

We'll get some good ale and some good venison here, me darling.

Come on, Dickie, I'm starving.

Right.

A bit outrageous, but I'll try anything once. Excuse me.

On a horse in full gallop, you say?

I see your friend Donald with his usual self.

But I'm not at all sure about you.

Well, just hang in there. I'm doing the best I can.

If there's any hanging to be done, it'll be you at the end of the king's rope.

That'll never happen, I promise you.

Look, I know you don't understand, but you're safe now.

Just one more day and my whole fantasy...

This whole adventure will be over with, so just remember that, would you?

I remember well enough.

You promised to give up your wayward ways, Victor.

I will.

I'm turning over a new leaf in more ways than one.

Vicky, they want a song here.

Well, you better think.

I think.

Here's to the maiden of bachelor 15.

Now to the widow of 50.

Here's to the flaunting extravagant queen.

And here's to the housewife that's pretty.

Let the toast pass.

Drink to the last. I warrant she'll prove an excuse for the glass. Let the

pass. Drink to the last. I warrant she'll prove an excuse for the glass.

Here's to the charmer whose dimples reprise.

Now to the maid who has none, sir.

Here's to the girl with a pair of blue eyes. And here's to the nymph with but

one, sir.

Let the toast pass.

Drink to the last.

I want to see you move an excuse for the glass. Drink to the last.

I want to see you move an excuse for the glass.

Here's to the maid with a bosom of snow.

Now to her brown as a berry.

Here's to the wife with a face full of woe. And now to the damsel that's merry.

Let the toast pass.

Drink to the glass. I want you to prove an excuse for the glass.

Let the toast pass.

Drink to the glass.

I want you to prove an excuse for the glass.

Let them be clumsy or let them be slim.

Marry, I care not a feather.

Fill a pint tankard quite up to the brim. And let us all toast them

Let the toast pass, drink to the last. I warrant she'll prove an excuse for the

glass. Let the toast pass, drink to the last.

I warrant she'll prove an excuse for the glass.

The greatest display.

Question? I want to call this whole thing off.

Roxanne got kidnapped.

Besides that, she doesn't even recognize me. Mr. Palmer, or should I say, Mr.

Turpin, I told you there would be certain complications.

Well, uncomplicated.

I want out. Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Palmer. That's the one thing I can't give you.

What do you mean you can't give me?

I want to stop this. There is no way to stop it.

Not until the fantasy has run its course, you see.

Are you trying to tell me that I have to stay here?

Only until tomorrow, Mr. Palmer.

Only until tomorrow.

Oh!

Mr. Palmer.

Oh, great.

Excellent choice, Lauren.

Thank you, sir.

Mr. Rock?

Ah, Mr. McKenna.

May I offer you some coffee?

Thank you.

Lawrence?

You look distraught.

Yeah, well, I've been walking on the beach, thinking.

Really thinking.

That's something we all need to do from time to time.

Thinking, that is.

Mine is a little bit overdue.

Are you referring to the, as they say, mess you've made of your mouth?

That's it, Mr. Ross.

Looking back, I guess I was a bachelor for too long.

When Sheila and I were married, we both had separate careers, so I was on my own

a lot, strange cities.

With your wife's best friend?

That was only once.

Oh.

Margo's been throwing herself at me for years. I guess this time I just forgot

to duck.

But why, Mr. McKenna?

Why was this time different?

If you know the answer to that, you may know the answer to your problem.

Perhaps even save your marriage.

I guess I was feeling sorry for myself. Sort of an accumulated frustration.

About what?

Sheila would never go on any of my business trips with me. I know it sounds

stupid. Maybe I was just tired of feeling lonesome.

I'm tired of missing her.

Have you told your wife that, Mr. McKenna?

Not for a long time.

Why don't you tell her again?

Tell her how you really feel.

What do you think you're doing?

Well, this is a wenching part, Mr. Rowe promised me. How dare you?

Get out of my bedroom.

Roxy, I'm your husband.

Not yet, you're not. At the rate you're going, you never will be. Well, what's

an adventure without a little love, baby? I'll scream, Dick Turpin, I'll...

Did

I ever tell you I love you?

Often.

Well, Roxy, I... Oh, uh... Sorry to be a bother. I thought this might interest

the two of you.

The redcoats are coming up the road. Somebody must have chipped them off.

Now you don't even stay the night.

They really want you badly. They never give up.

Come on, Dickie, let's go. This fantasy is getting complicated.

Where are you going?

How should I know?

When will you be back?

When I find Rourke and he gets us out of here.

Rourke?

back for this one.

She's his whore.

That's strange.

What's strange?

Well, they haven't been chasing her. What does that mean?

I don't know, but I don't like it.

I think we'd better split up and find out what's going on.

Well, I'm going to go back and get Roxanne.

There you go, Sheila, honey.

I wasn't sure if you said cola or malt, so I got on board. Oh, well, I'm not

surprised. And lots of onions. Puts hair on your chest. Yeah.

Sheila, we have to talk.

Will you get out of here? I've got a date.

You? A date?

That's why I'm here. To start a new life with a new man.

Him? Him has a name.

It's Charlie.

I've also got a chair, and you're sitting in it now. Look, would you mind

have a few minutes with my wife, okay?

Your wife? Ah.

Then you're Frank. Frank. I couldn't soap off my wedding ring so I could

it down the sewer.

Charlie saw it and he asked me about us.

Yeah, Frank, and from what I've been hearing, I figured you had claws or

I'd like to speak to my wife in private for a few minutes, okay?

You'll be okay?

What do you mean, will she be okay?

Charlie, why don't you take a jog around the lake?

I'll see you when you get back.

You hurt the little lady, Frankie.

I'll break your thumbs.

Break my thumbs? Would you tell that guy that I'm the beef to Fantasy Island or

something? Look, you have your minute. Now, what do you want?

A little smile, maybe?

A little pat on the head to tell me that everything's all right? That this isn't

some kind of crazy nightmare?

That everything's going to be like it used to be?

Just like that, huh?

Forget what you did, just like that.

Sheila, what you've done is done.

I can't undo it. I know, but forgetting just won't cut it. I can't forget. Now,

will you please just leave?

Well, Mrs. McKenna?

Now that you seem to have your revenge, how do you feel?

I don't know, Mr. Ward.

Well, you can be sure of one thing.

You've probably driven your husband into the arms of the other woman.

alone, Margo.

What's the prize?

You're looking for Frank, not to worry. He had some business to take care of,

but I'll be meeting him in an hour.

So thanks.

For what? For going on the make with your best friend's husband?

For that slap you gave me.

Makes taking Frank away from you a whole lot easier.

I wouldn't be so confident.

And besides, it seems that you're a nice place to visit.

But nobody wants to live there.

Cool it, Sheila.

You don't have to be a hypocrite. At least I was there when Frank needed

somebody. Where were you?

And wasn't I lucky to have a best friend to stroke Frank's ego while I wasn't

there? You know, I really feel sorry for you, Margo. You're such a sad person.

Don't say that to me. I mean it.

I don't need your sympathy.

Good day, ladies. I wasn't talking about sympathy. Lovely day. You lead a very

empty life, Margo, and you try to give it some meaning by having affairs with

some other woman's husband.

I pity you. Pity, huh? I'll show you pity.

What are you doing?

It's not your fault.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, too.

And it turns out this way.

Oh, Mr. Roy. Are you all right, madam? Yes.

Oh, you know you were right about driving Frankie to Marco's arms.

It's over.

Here, sit. This is my dinner.

It seems to me that you've just demonstrated you're still willing to

your marriage. It takes two to make a marriage work.

And I'm just beginning to realize how much of my end of it I didn't hold up.

Which doesn't excuse what your husband did, of course.

But it at least should help you understand why.

Do you know where Frank is?

I think you'll find him in the North Garden.

Sometimes the way in which you work out these fantasies completely mystifies me.

Thank you, Lawrence.

Thank you.

Broke? Where the hell have you been?

Calm yourself, Mr. Palmer. Calm yourself.

Calm? You won't calm.

I've been shot. Look at me. You wanted this adventure, Mr. Palmer.

This is the reality of Dick Turpin's life.

Yes, but being shot wasn't part of the package.

I mean, I didn't want to get hurt.

I didn't want to put Roxanne in danger. She could have been hurt. Mr. Palmer,

she already has been.

What? But you promised.

I promised nothing beyond you realizing your fantasy.

Mr. Palmer, in trying to warn you, she was wounded.

My God, she can't be. Your wife loves you enough to give up her life for you.

But then in her own way, she's always been giving up her life for you, hasn't

she? You just haven't noticed.

I've got to go back.

Mr. Palmer, the Redcoats are there.

Death is death.

If you die here, you stay here. Yes, but what about Roxanne?

Remember Dick Turpin and the poem...

Blood red were his spurs in the golden noon.

Wine red was his velvet coat when they shot him down on the highway, down like

dog on the highway, and he laying his blood on the highway with a bunch of

at his throat.

That's Dick Turpin, and you just reminded me I'm Jack Palmer, and I'm

for my wife.

Do you still want to talk?

More than anything in the world.

I don't know if it'll help you understand.

Yeah, but I'd like to try.

I guess I would too.

Like I told you, what happened will never happen again.

How can you be sure?

How can I be sure?

By both of us understanding how it happened, by our being more loving,

considerate.

How did it happen?

Margot had asked me when I was going to finalize that condo deal in Aspen with

Norm.

Well, she said that she'd look me up in Aspen and that we'd make romantic

history.

I thought she was joking, so I said, sure.

I didn't mean it, Sheila.

I wasn't serious.

She was, of course.

She was.

When I got to Aspen on Tuesday, she was already in my hotel room.

Sheila, look, I was lonely.

And I was angry because I'd already asked you to go with me, but you had

apartment to decorate.

I remember.

She played on that.

Not that she was any more guilty than I was.

But after a few too many drinks and a lot of self -pity,

it happened.

I could have thrown myself off one of those cliffs up there, but it was too

late.

Is it too late, Frank, for us?

Not if we take an honest look at ourselves, at our relationship, and put

love and understanding back into it.

I think I'd like to try.

There was a wild and reckless man determined what his name

he wrote to save his lady fair or die and end

his shame.

Roxy's got to be all right.

How did the poem go?

Her eyes grew wide for a moment. She drew one last deep breath. Then her

moved in the moonlight.

The musket shattered the moonlight.

Shattering her breast in the moonlight.

And warned him with her death.

Oh God, no, Roxy can't be dead.

Please, please.

Go.

If you love me, save yourself.

I'll save us both or we'll die together.

Hold on, sweetheart. We'll make it yet.

Our only chance is Black Vest. She's under the window, but you have to hold

tight.

I love you, Roxanne, forever and ever.

remember now.

I'm so sorry. That's all I want to do for the rest of my life is to be with

Your loving, caring, dedicated, dull husband.

Well, I hope you were satisfied with your adventure, Mr. Palmer.

Mr. Oak, I'll never complain about my nice, safe delight to you.

I'm delighted.

Jack says he's going to bring a little turpin into our own lives.

Don't worry, Lawrence.

Just a romantic part.

Goodbye. Goodbye, Mr. Palmer.

Goodbye, Lawrence.

We may have come here separately, but we're leaving the right way, together.

And with love and a new understanding which will ensure a bright future,

together. Thanks to you.

What will we all do without him, Lawrence?

Polly, madam.

Very Polly.

Thank you. Goodbye.

You're welcome. Goodbye.

You look troubled, Lawrence.

Well, she did ask for a new man, sir. I mean, that's what she came here for.

That's what she wanted.

It was what she asked for, yes, but it was definitely not what she came here

for, nor what she truly wanted.

How did you know that, sir? Well, in our business, knowing such things goes with

the territory, doesn't it? I still don't understand you. That's good, Lawrence.