Original subtitles

Thank you.

Good morning, boss.

What a beautiful day.

What subtle color in the sky.

What vibrant green.

What are you talking about?

And why on earth are you dressed up like that?

Don't you know we have to meet our guests?

Why, boss?

This is art.

Painting is really where it's at.

I see.

And what has brought about this sudden interest in art, if I may then ask?

Well, painting at least is my artistic soul.

There wouldn't be any other reason why you have so suddenly become interested

art. Like what, boss?

Like attracting females.

No, huh?

Well, now that you mention it, some chicks really go for sensitive artistic

types. Tattoo, whenever you are ready, we should meet our guests.

Smiles, everyone.

Smiles.

Miss Cindy Carter, a PBX operator from Chicago, Illinois.

PBX? Sounds like an airplane.

Now, PBX is a switchboard. Miss Carter is a switchboard operator for the

Publishing Company.

What's a fantasy, Bob?

Oh, one held by millions of workers the world over, Tattoo. For this weekend,

Miss Carter wishes to become the boss, the head of a large corporation with all

the trappings that go with it. Sounds like fun.

Yes, it could be a great deal of fun and exciting, Tattoo, as long as Miss

Carter realizes that running a large corporation can carry with it many

pitfalls. Pitfall?

You mean that nice lady can get in trouble?

Who are they, boss? The young man is Mr. Mike Jenner. The young lady is his

fiancée, Stacy Cummings. They plan to marry as soon as they return to their

in Carmel, California.

But, boss, her island is so beautiful.

Why can't he get married here?

Because Mr. Jenner has come for a very different purpose than two. You see, his

fantasy is to find an extremely dangerous criminal by the name of Eddie

Why is he looking for him?

You see, Mr. Jenner's father was a courier for a large diamond company.

About a year ago, he disappeared while carrying a million dollars worth of

diamonds. A million dollars?

The company his father worked for assumes that he absconded with the

Mr. Jenner believes that Collins robbed and murdered his father.

What will happen when Mr. Jenner finds him?

He's not sure.

Perhaps kill him.

Did you say killing boss?

My dear guests, I am Mr. Rourke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

You said in your letter you may have found this Eddie Collins.

I believe I have.

So this is him.

I was beginning to think that he didn't exist.

It was just a figment of my imagination.

Where did you find him, Mr. Rourke?

He's a seaman on a freighter that is due to stop at a small seaport on the other

side of the island this afternoon.

Harley, the... place, I expect to find a man with a million dollars in uncut

diamonds. Doesn't matter. If he's going to be there, I'll be waiting for him.

Perhaps that isn't wise, Mr. Jenner.

You see, I have no jurisdiction on that section of the coast, and the

authorities there take a dim view of visitors who take the law into their own

hands. No offense, Mr. Rourke, but I'm tired of waiting for the authorities to

handle this.

I believe my dad was killed and framed for a crime he'd never commit.

Bet on it.

I'm going to clear him regardless of what I have to do.

You must have been very devoted to your father.

Yes, I was.

Oh, Mike, you know that's not really true.

She's right.

The truth is, like a lot of sons and daughters, I never thought much about my

old man while he was alive.

But he was always there.

understanding, reliable, and unnoticed.

I did my own things, took them for granted.

After he was gone, I started thinking about the little things he tried to do

when I needed him.

I know now that he loved me.

You know, Mr. Rourke, I never once told him I loved him, that I was grateful for

all the things he tried to do.

Oh, I approve of your motives, Mr. Jenner.

But you will remember my warning about taking the law into your own hands,

you?

Just being the boss wasn't my only reason for coming to Fantasy Island.

I'd like to work with the president of Ballard Publishing. His name is Brent

Bailey.

If you want to know the truth, he's my secret fantasy.

This is where I live?

No, this is where you work.

No high -rise office building?

Well, we feel that high -rise buildings with all their steel and concrete

somehow blemish the natural beauty of Fantasy Island, you see.

Shall we go in and meet your staff?

My staff?

Naturally.

My staff.

I've got staff.

And now, Miss Carter, may I present Mr. Alex Bray, Vice President in Charge of

Advertising. Hello. Mr. William Front, Vice President of Personnel.

How do you do? Mr. Ralph Hall, Vice President of Marketing.

Hello. Mr.

Howard Callis, Vice President of Finance.

And lastly, Mr. Gary Poynter, your Executive Secretary.

On behalf of all of us, Miss Carter, I want to welcome you to Atwell

Inc. Thank you so much, Mr. Karras. I'm sure we'll all get along just

famously.

Thank you. Thank you.

So, you're my executive secretary.

Yes, ma 'am. Well, let's get one thing straight right away.

I don't like formalities. From now on, you call me Cindy, and I'll call you

Harry.

Well, with all due respect, I don't think we can do that.

Why not?

Well, mainly because my name is not Harry. It's Gary.

But if there's anything you need, just buzz me.

Don't move.

Something wrong, Tattoo?

It's not that.

Being a sensitive artist, I just can't relate.

Well, gee, is there anything I can do?

Well, it's all those clothes. I feel confined.

You don't suppose you could, uh... Gee, I don't know.

That is all for the sake of art.

Yes, I'd be delighted to have lunch with you and discuss methods for reducing

overhead, of course.

Who did you say you were again?

Right. Gary, put me down for lunch on Wednesday with Jason back.

Now, Mr. Morgan, I... Mr. Morgan?

Mr. Morgan, I... Mr. Morgan?

Oh, there you are.

Mr. Morgan, I'm going to have to get back to you after I've read your report.

Mr. Callas, what are all these things that I'm signing?

Routine, Miss Carter.

Merely routine.

Just keep signing.

Miss Carter's office?

Oh, no, no, that's fine. I'll tell her.

Yes, thank you. Goodbye.

That was Brent Bailey. He's just arrived from the mainland. He'll be here in two

hours.

Brent Bailey?

Yes. The Brent Bailey? The president of Ballard Publishing?

Yes.

here. He works for you?

The Brett Bailey really works for me?

I've been telling you, Atwell Industries Inc. is a conglomerate.

We own nine companies, one of which is Ballard Publishing. You are chairman of

the board, and it's a real company, yes.

Wasn't your fantasy to be the boss?

Well, yes, but I thought it was all a lie. I never for a minute thought it was

real. Oh, I assure you, Miss Carter, it's very real.

It's crazy.

What happened to the previous chairman of the board?

Mr. Neil Atwell.

His plane went down somewhere in South America, the Andes.

It's presumed that he died in the crash.

But how did that make me chairman?

Well, it's not at all complicated. Please sit down, Miss Carter. Miss

You see, before he disappeared...

Mr. Atwell drew up a document giving me power of attorney to name his

temporary successor in the event something catastrophic occurred.

Then I really am Brent Bailey's boss.

Oh, indeed you are.

Brent Bailey is on the island to attend the annual stockholders' meeting.

He's on the board of directors.

You mean I have to go to a stockholders' meeting?

You'll have to run it, Madame Chairman.

Run it?

I wasn't so sure. I think I might be sick.

Please, Mike, let's go back.

Don't start again. If Mr. Rourke says he'll be there, he'll be there.

But if you don't kill him, he'll kill you.

Six, excuse me. Have you ever seen this man before?

Please don't go.

Be careful.

Well? Hey, what do you want?

You.

Henry Jenner was my father.

Break it up.

A little time on the chain gang is what you need.

Take them away.

You look sick, boy.

Better get used to it. This is going to be your home for a year.

If you got any ideas about escaping, forget it. The swamps don't get you. The

snakes or the crocodiles will.

And if they don't, I will.

And if it's me,

you'll wish it had been one of the others.

There is something you should know about the stockholders' meeting, Miss Carter.

No, no, no.

Cindy, you said you'd call me Cindy.

Cindy, there is one very important item on the agenda.

It has to do with the auditing of the company's pension plan.

Oh, well, why is it so important?

Well, just before his plane disappeared, Mr. Atwell became suspicious. He

thought that...

Somebody was stealing those funds.

Really?

Well, why didn't he order an audit?

He disappeared before he had the opportunity.

What about the board of directors?

Most of them are against it.

It's very expensive.

And they're afraid of the scandal it might cause, and perhaps the stock would

hit a nosedive.

Where did, um, Brent Bailey stand?

He's against it.

Well, then, you see, I mean, if Brent Bailey's against it, I'm sure

all right.

Not only is he a top -notch executive, he's very honest and straightforward.

I'd better go. I want to freshen up a little before Mr. Bailey gets here.

Send him in.

Mr. Bailey, how nice to meet you.

What can I do for you?

Stop looking so ravishingly beautiful for openers. It makes it hard to

concentrate on business.

You look very familiar.

Have we met before?

No, no, no. I don't think so. Of course not. Who could forget a face and a body

like that?

Tell me, how are things at Ballard Publishing?

Never better.

Sales up 27 % over last year.

But you'll get all that at the stockholders' meeting.

Been having any fun?

Oh, not really. You know how it is running a conglomerate.

And you know what they say about all work and no play.

Will I see you at the luau tonight?

Luau? Well, stockholders' meetings can't be all business.

Nobody would come.

It sounds like it might be fun.

If you're there and I'm there, it will definitely be fun.

I'll see you tonight, Madame Chairman.

Maybe.

how is Fantasy Island's answer to Michelangelo doing?

Great, boss, great.

Say, Tattoo, this is quite good.

Oh, boss, that's nothing.

Wait until tomorrow. I do the real thing.

Oh?

I make Raphael Venus Rising look like a third -grade finger painting.

Tattoo, are you aware that the painting of Venus Rising is a nude?

But of course, boss.

Now all I have... to do is to tell David.

And tomorrow, you two fellows will be too tired to do any fighting.

And that's a promise.

Revenge?

Hey, Collins.

Can you imagine what the guys in here would do to you if they knew you had

access to a million dollars in diamonds?

A million dollars?

Yeah. I figure they'd slice you up real good for a piece of that action.

Now, what happened to my old man?

Forget it, punk.

I'm Cindy Carter. Welcome to the luau.

Hello. Welcome to the luau. Hope you're having a good time in the island. Help

yourself. Make yourself comfortable.

Cindy, do you mind if I say something?

I don't think so.

Why don't you try me?

Here goes.

You look very beautiful tonight.

Thank you.

Maybe it's because I've never been so happy in my whole life.

That Mr. Rourke really knows how to deliver.

Good evening.

How are you tonight, Madam Chairman?

Cindy. Call me Cindy.

Excuse us, will you please?

Of course.

the giver is entitled to one kiss of gratitude from the receiver.

Huh? How about it? Where is it?

Getting me killed won't help you, will it, sonny?

I might tell you what you want to know after you help me get out of this place.

I don't intend to spend the next year in this pest hole.

Escape?

It's easier for the two of us.

Huh?

Believe me, I'd sooner do it by myself if I could.

You're going to need that vial for the iron.

You've got something to think about.

I'm enjoying the stockholders' meeting so much.

So am I.

More papers to sign. I'm sorry to interrupt.

Are they important?

Only to the government, Miss Carter.

You know, one of these days, the whole world is going to collapse under all the

paperwork.

Sign right there.

Shouldn't I read them?

Trust the man, Cindy.

I mean, he is the vice president in charge of finance.

If we can't trust Howard, we'll all be in trouble.

Thank you.

Go someplace where he can't find us. Hold it, Cindy.

What's the matter?

Aren't we going to spend the afternoon together?

It must be jet lag or something. Suddenly I'm bushed.

I'll have to give you a rain check, okay?

Sure.

I guess it'll happen.

I'll see you later.

I'll talk to him, but he won't do anything.

Mike, I wish you'd never come to this place.

There's no time to talk. We've only got a minute.

Listen, Collins and I are breaking out of here.

You and Collins?

Listen, there's a road that runs along the big marsh area. It's about ten miles

west of here.

Mike! Meet us there tomorrow with clothes and a car.

You don't understand.

As soon as you get out of here, Collins will try to kill you.

I know what he has in mind.

Stacy, I can't do this without you.

Will you meet us there?

May I come in? Oh, sure.

Cindy, I... I really don't know how to... I'm afraid you're in trouble.

What? It has to do with Howard Callas and Brent Bailey. They are using you as

pigeon.

Pigeon? What are you talking about?

You remember the pension plan audit I told you about?

The one that's coming up for the vote at the stockholders' meeting tomorrow?

Well, yes, but I told you, if Brent's against that, so am I.

Well, he wasn't taking any chances.

He's made it so you won't get to vote on it anyway.

Well, that's silly.

Of course I can. I have all of Atwell's proxies.

Had.

Past tense.

Remember all those papers that Callas got you to sign?

Yes. Well, one of them gives Brent Bailey your vote.

You must be mistaken, Gary.

I mean, Brent... Brent Bailey is a gentleman.

And he's honest and forthright.

Really?

Well, look at this. It is a photocopy of one of the papers you signed.

How did you get it?

I borrowed it from Callis' office.

Brooklyn Fridge. Twice.

She was so eager to sign those papers, I nearly broke up.

How about that? You look so familiar. If she was scared to death, I'd recognize

her. What did you say she does? She's a PBX operator. I see her maybe three

times a year, including the Christmas party. She's always making calf eyes at

me. Oh, yeah, you're right.

You're right. I'm nothing but a dumb switchboard operator who thought she was

love with her boss.

Well, you've done your dirty work. You've got your proxies.

Let me tell you just one thing.

I'm going to go to that stockholders' meeting tomorrow, and I'm going to tell

those people exactly what happened. By the time I'm through with you two,

going to be real... Hold it, Madam Chairman.

You aren't going to open your mouth tomorrow or ever.

And do you want to know why?

Tell her why, Howard.

Because you'll go to prison if you do.

Besides the proxies, you signed several other pieces of paper without bothering

to read them.

All totaled.

You've bought, and the company has paid for, over $400 ,000 worth of goodies.

That's all very illegal, Madam Chairman.

Worth, I'd say, five or more years in prison. On the other hand, if you keep

your mouth shut and go along, we might arrange a nice, fat job for you. A

vice presidency in public relations, for example.

Thank you.

to my father, you'll spend the rest of your life in here.

Look, it was a simple heist. I was just part of the muscle.

That's all.

We cased his route for two weeks and then one day we grabbed him at the

mart. Took the diamonds and you killed him?

No. We had a better idea than that.

We wanted the cops looking for him, not us.

Wanted to tell everybody what really happened.

I told him nobody would believe that Dave would figure he's in on a job.

And then he started acting crazy.

And I didn't want him pulling me down from that big cliff with him. So I

left him here to cool off.

Oh, I kept my eye on him.

Watched him.

But he sat there for two hours.

And then he started crying.

Like a kid cried like a baby.

And said, help me.

He stands there looking down.

I got here as soon as I could. What's up? My dander, that's what. I'm going to

bite them, Gary.

You said on the phone that they could send you to prison.

I don't care.

I can't stand by and let them bleed that pension fund dry because of my goops.

There's millions in that fund, and there's a lot of little people that are

counting on that money for their retirement. Now, you are being hard on

yourself. You're up against a couple of pros.

I've made up my mind, Gary. Are you in or out?

Honey?

I have been in since the first time I met you.

Come on.

Just go along with the game plan and there won't be any trouble.

Item number one on today's agenda is a proposed audit of the pension fund.

Any discussion?

The chair recognizes Mr.

Brent Bailey.

I urge a no vote.

The audit would be costly, over $300 ,000 to start.

I don't have to tell you what any hint of scandal would do to the price of our

stock. Now, let me tell you, ladies and gentlemen, the pension fund is alive and

very well.

We'll see.

further discussion?

Well, then I suggest you make yourselves very comfortable, because I propose to

speak in favor of the audit.

Objection. Ignore him, Cindy. You are doing great.

You see before you, ladies and gentlemen, a future jailbird of America.

Mr. Bailey and Mr. Callis have threatened to send me to prison if I

in any way. But let me start at the very beginning.

You see, I live and work in Chicago at Ballard Publishing, which is owned by

Atwell. Will you sit down, Miss Carter? Let us speak. We have more important

things to speak about.

Go on, Cindy.

As I was saying, I was a girl who had a fantasy.

And part of that fantasy included getting close to Mr. Brent Bailey, who

wants to send me to prison.

Of course, I never thought it would happen, but...

Mr. Rourke is some kind of miracle worker, and suddenly everything seemed

coming up roses.

Mr. Bailey even seemed to care for me, but all he really was after was Mr.

Atwell's proxy votes, which I controlled.

Did you hear that? True at all.

She's lying.

Miss Carter, I insist that you stop before you involve yourself in a slander

suit.

Because of my gullibility, Mr. Callis and Mr. Bailey got my proxy votes away

from me.

You see, I was going to vote in favor of an audit, and I had the proxies to

swing that vote.

And do you want to know why Mr. Bailey doesn't want an audit? I'm warning you.

Because he and Mr. Callis have been siphoning money out of the pension fund.

That's not true. That's lies.

Well, I can't prove it. But if Mr. Atwell were here, he could prove it.

Atwell is here.

And he can prove it.

I like your spot, Miss Carter.

I also like the way you handle yourself in the clinches.

As far as the pension fund is concerned, the sooner we audit it, the better.

Mr. Atwell, where did you come from?

The office that adjoins this boardroom, where I heard everything on closed

-circuit TV.

The plane crash.

We all thought... The best way to catch a thief is not let him know that you're

watching him. So I arranged to drop out for a while with Mr. Rourke's very able

help.

Going somewhere, gentlemen?

I think you better stay.

You see, those two men eyeing you so carefully, they are police officers.

I think they might frown on your leaving just now, you know.

I think perhaps you should go back to your seats. Don't you?

Yes.

Enough of that, you two.

There's a stockholders' meeting in progress.

You take over, Atwell. This chairman of the board just resigned.

We'd just be on the same boat.

far as you go, kid. I'll take that confession now. Will you?

Michael!

No!

Help me, kid.

Help me.

I can't move.

I was going to take you back, hand you over with a confession.

But this is better, Collins. It's just what you deserve.

You win, kid. You win. Just help me. Help!

We left the trail from that quicksand.

Why aren't they following us?

Because they are my dogs, Mr. Collins.

you enjoy being the boss.

I loved it.

And as a matter of fact, Brent Bailey did me a big favor.

How so?

Well, he challenged me.

So now I'm going back to school where I can get more education so I can qualify

for a job where I can be the real boss.

Congratulations. And you, Mr. Pointer?

Well, thanks to Cindy and Mr. Atwill, I am going to become vice president of the

Ballard Publishing House in Chicago next week.

Watch it.

Y 'all gonna be two boss in the same family.

Don't you worry, Tattoo.

Ours is going to be a marriage where there's only one boss.

That is, when Cindy gives me permission to say so.

Goodbye. Goodbye, Miss Boyter. Goodbye. Goodbye, Miss Carter.

Thank you for enabling me to clear my father's name.

You are most welcome, Mr. Jenner.

What happens to Eddie Collins now?

It has been said that the seeds of our punishment are sown at the same time we

commit the sin.

Mr. Collins will have the remainder of his life to pay for his sins.

And what does the future hold for the two of you? With this behind us?

We're going to make the remainder of our lives as happy as possible.

Goodbye, Miss Ward.

Goodbye, Mr. Jenner. You too.

Thank you, boss. Very welcome.

Well, Tattoo, I see you're anxious to continue with your art.

Oh, by the way, have you informed your model how you propose to paint her?

Don't worry, boss.

I sent her a note and I told her to meet me here.

And I told her not to worry.

My only interest is in the pursuit of my heart.

Are you sure that your only interest isn't in the pursuit of your model?

Oh, boss.

Hi, baby.

Are you ready to pose for me?

Are you crazy?

Posing in this silly swimsuit was bad enough.

But if you think you're going to hang a picture of me in some Paris museum

wearing nothing but a smile, then you've got another thing coming.

I don't understand.

Well, maybe this will explain it.

The two, have you ever thought of taking a painting by the numbers?