Original subtitles

Tattoo? Tattoo, where are you?

I'm coming, boss. I'm coming.

Tattoo, might I inquire exactly what you are doing?

What? Isn't it the week of the fantasy island marathon?

Yes, it is. And this year we have athletes coming from all over the world.

That's right.

And what do they do to start the Olympics?

The torch, of course.

Boss, this year I will be the one to open the Fantasy Island Marathon by

lighting the flame of victory.

Excuse me, boss.

Tattoo, if you are quite finished, I suggest you change your clothes on the

literally, so we may greet our guests.

Playing so big.

Smiles, everyone.

Smiles.

Oh, they look like a singing group.

Two hits and a miss.

Just a little humor.

Oh.

The young ladies are Miss Gretchen Wasserman and her best friend, Miss

Kelly. The gentleman is Mr. Olaf Olofsson. All three are co -workers at

Beaver Barbell Factory in Beaver Falls, Pennsylvania.

Big Beaver Barbell? I never heard of it. Which is why the girl's fantasy is to

sponsor the winner of our Fantasy Island marathon.

Miss Kelly and Miss Wasserman have chosen Mr.

Olofsson to carry their company banner.

They hope to use the resulting publicity to improve the factory's fortunes.

Unless business picks up...

The barbell factory will have to close and the girls and their community will

bankrupt.

Mr. Patrick Apaka, all the way from San Francisco, California.

Patrick Apaka?

Boss, where is he? I don't see him.

He's right there, Tattoo. Where?

In that nurse's arms.

You mean the baby has a fantasy?

What kind of fantasy could a baby have?

One he has no way of understanding now, yet one that could be the most important

factor in the rest of his life. He wants to find a home with a loving mother and

father. You mean he's an orphan?

Yes, his parents were killed in a car crash a month ago.

It was always his mother's wish that if anything ever happened to her, little

Patrick would be raised here on Fantasy Island, where she herself grew up.

She live on Fantasy Island?

Do you remember Alicia Macapoo?

My dear guests, I am Mr. Rourke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

Hello, ladies and gentlemen. This is Bob Sigrin speaking to you from the

beautiful grounds of the Fantasy Island Hotel, where a lavish pre -race buffet

is being held for the contestants in the Fantasy Island Marathon, perhaps the

world's most exotic and demanding athletic event.

Now let's meet some of our competitors who will be vying for the cash prize of

over $250 ,000.

We have the dauntless Russian champion, Boris Shmolensk.

All business as usual and seldom smiling.

Dasvidaniya, sports.

From the Federal Republic of Nigeria, this impressive -looking gentleman is

Kintata Maluko.

And perhaps the two most popular men in sports today, the British champion,

Freddie Hunsaker, and the American Olympic star whose personal integrity

sense of fair play have earned him the affectionate title of the Clean Machine.

Ladies and gentlemen, Eugene Bodine. Hi, Bob. Eugene, how do you feel? Oh, I

feel great. I've worked very hard for this, and I look forward to a well

contest, win, lose, or draw.

Thanks, Gene.

There's millions of people out there who'll be rooting for you.

And over here we have, well, one of the real bad boys of sports, Bruno Grass.

And with him is his sponsor and trainer, the eminent sports physician and

publisher of Sports Health magazine, Dr. R .M. Funk.

Well, I'm afraid it won't be a very interesting race.

Bruno here has never been in better shape.

And I expect him to beat his pathetic competition with minimal effort.

I see.

Well, good luck to the both of you. Oh, if you'll excuse me, I see our host.

Mr. Roark.

Yes.

Mr. Roark, you concede to this incredible idea, this incredible

Do you have a favor to win it? No, Mr. Singram, no, no, no.

The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat is a phrase which has little

meaning on Fantasy Island. No, I just hope that everyone enjoys a keen and

friendly competition. That's all.

I see you're being very impartial. But maybe you can tell us a little about a

newcomer. A newcomer to international competition, that is. Olaf Olofsson.

Will you come with me?

This is Mr.

Olofsson and his sponsors, Miss Gretchen Wasserman and Miss Bonnie Kelly.

Our boy here developed his fantastic physique and size using great training

equipment. Big beaver barbells! That's great.

Fine.

Thank you. If you'll excuse us, Mr. Rourke... Now, why don't you go work on

pecs or something?

Good boy.

Now, Bunny, we've got to talk strategy.

Time to start eliminating our competition.

Oh,

no.

Oh, no.

Fell, I think I sprained my ankle.

Oh, no.

What are we going to do?

If he can't run in the race, the factory will close down and we'll be out of

work. We've got to have a contestant in the marathon.

There must be something we can do.

I mean, there's just got to be... Wait a minute.

Hey, I got an idea.

Listen to this, Bunny.

I've ever heard.

Oh, do you have a better one? No, but that'll never work.

Sure it will, Sonny.

One down, four to go.

Are you all right, Tattoo?

I'm all right. Thank you, Mary. Thank you, Kiko.

I'll get some sheets on here and we'll be all set.

She was cute.

Yes.

Is she going to stay with you?

Only at night.

Until we can find a proper home for him.

Your mother's going to take care of him in the daytime.

Yeah?

That's great.

Maybe I'll babysit him and make some money.

I could sure use it.

You sure you won't mind keeping him here in your room, Tattoo?

No, it will be all right.

You know, I think it is because I knew his mother.

When she was young like you, she used to play outside in the yard with the other

kids.

It seemed like it was yesterday.

Here, I'll take him now.

Why is he crying?

Give it back to me.

Why is he doing that?

Don't you get it? He likes you.

He doesn't want to leave you.

He likes me?

Sure. He's crazy about you.

Okay,

sports fans, a little recap now for those of you who may have just tuned in.

At the starter's gun, our contestants will race along this course to their

bicycles. Now, they'll race those bicycles for 50 miles along the north

the island and to the finish of our first and only event for today. Now, I

Mr. Rourke is on his way here now to the starting line, but one of our

competitors has not yet shown up. Yes, that's right. Olaf Olesen is nowhere to

be seen. And wait a minute.

I think I... Yes, he is on his way to the starting line right now.

This isn't going to work.

Olaf's a foot and a half taller than I am. Well, walk taller. And you think

short. I'm already on my toes.

Keep still a foot taller.

Oh, let's lift her up.

Excuse me.

Hi, guys.

All right.

Gentlemen.

And, uh... Gentlemen.

On your marks.

Get set.

And there they go with the clean machine, leading to the lead, followed

Boris, Clement, Bruno, Grant, Sir Freddy, and Contessa. And wait a minute.

Something is wrong with Olaf Olsen, ladies and gentlemen. He has stopped

running. His pants have come down. Wait a minute. That is not Olaf Olsen at all.

It looks like it's his sponsor, Bunny Kelly.

Mr. Roark, we will have to have a ruling on this strange turn of events.

Well, according to the marathon rules, Miss Kelly sponsored an entry, you see.

Now, if she wishes to change that entry and run herself, I have no objection.

And I see nothing illegal.

Well, there you have it. You've heard it from Mr. Roark himself.

Bunny Kelly is an official contestant.

Well, boss, Patrick is all set.

He's sleeping now.

Oh, that's very nice. Very nice.

How's everything doing?

Not too well, Tattoo.

Several of these figures don't balance.

That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about finding Patrick a home.

Oh. Well, actually, Tattoo, I haven't had a chance to concentrate on Patrick's

fantasy yet. Things have been so busy.

Boss, you need to start yet?

Of course I started.

Several people here on the island want to adopt a baby and have sent in their

applications, you see.

Unfortunately, I haven't gotten around to all of them yet.

What kind of people are finding this paper?

Well, oh, yes, the Kohalas sent in an application.

You mean the people from the fishing village?

Yes, uh -huh.

Who else?

Well, let me think.

The Clancy's filled out an application, if I'm not mistaken.

You mean the people who cook for the hotel?

Tattoo, what on earth is the matter with you?

Nothing, boss.

But how can you know somebody by looking at a piece of paper?

How do we know they're good enough for Patrick?

Well, the other applicants are the same kind of people as the Kohalas and the

Clancy's. Honest, hard -working people who live on the island and who want to

adopt a child.

I know them, and I love them.

But? This is too serious to take this lightly.

We have to find the best room for Patrick.

You said so yourself, didn't you?

Did anyone ever tell you you are a terrible nag?

But, considering your interest, I think I have the perfect solution to the

problem.

Since you are so anxious for Patrick to find just the right home, you pick the

parents.

Me?

Would you be satisfied with anyone else's choice?

Hmm?

Well?

All right, boss. I do it.

Thank you very much.

I promise I'm not going to let you down or let Patrick down.

I will find him the best home in the whole world.

See you, boss.

Yes.

Moving into the 11th mile now of this grueling bicycle race. All contestants

appear to be hanging tough, but the clean machine continues to hold a narrow

lead over the rest of the field. From our ground camera, Eugene is going out

strong, Sir Freddy is holding close, and neck and neck are Boris and the

tireless Quintetta Malucco.

As you can see, Dr. Funk is accompanying his protege, shouting words of

encouragement and instruction every mile of the way.

You blithering idiot, will you pedal?

We're out here to win, not lose.

Now get on!

What are you, crazy?

Pedal! Pedal or you're going back to the hole!

And it seems that Olaf Olofsson, the real Olaf, that is, is doing the same

Bunny Kelly, who's accompanied by Gretchen Wasserman. The terrain ahead is

rising steeply, and it's going to be very hard going, but it'll be very

interesting for us to see if this plucky little lady will survive it.

Hi, Tattoo. Hi, Thomas.

How's your leg?

A lot better.

Doc said we can go back to our own side of the island soon, and I can go back to

work.

What's wrong, Tattoo?

Oh, nothing.

I've just been all around the island, talking to people who want Patrick.

What's bad about that?

Oh, they're all very nice people, and I'm not saying anything against them.

But? Well...

I don't know if they can afford what his mother wanted him to have.

That's why Mary and I didn't apply.

With me out of work and all, I... Well, I know what you mean.

You know, some of the people are very nice, but it would take all their money

just to close back.

But they'd still like to have him anyway.

Mom! Dad!

Look, five dollars.

I sold the ukulele you made for me to a tourist.

You stole the ukulele your father made for you?

For five dollars?

Gee, I'm sorry.

But I really want a baseball mitt.

All the other kids on the team have one. And, well, I need one.

It's all right, son.

It was his, and he had a right to do what he wanted with it.

Thanks, Dad.

Yes.

Patrick, I don't know what I'm going to do with you.

Some people can give you one thing, others cannot.

And I promise you one thing.

I'm going to do my best to find you the best home in the world.

And that's a promise.

This is Bob Segan with the Fantasy Island Marathon.

The contestants are on the last leg of the bicycle race.

And here they come now, digging in and approaching the finish of this 50 -mile

grueling event.

And it looks like a clean machine in first position, with Bruno Gratz a close

second. Horst laments third, Quintana fourth, and yes, it's that...

Game little funny Kelly in fifth position.

Excellent time.

You have done exceedingly well.

Congratulations, gentlemen and Miss Kelly.

The concluding events of the marathon will begin tomorrow at dawn.

Well, meanwhile, food and shelter have been provided for your night's rest.

Sleep well, boy.

Today was a piece of cake compared to tomorrow.

Oh. Do sleep well.

Looks good.

Oh, funny, honey. Come on. We've got to talk about strategy.

Oh, you were just wonderful. Just wonderful.

How are you feeling, honey?

Am I standing up or lying down?

You're standing.

Good.

Oh, Bunny, you can't stay there, honey.

Up,

up. You got to get up and move around.

Up, up. Oh, your muscles look tightened.

Excuse me.

May I try?

Well, yeah.

Sure. Miss Kelly.

Bunny, I think your performance today was one of the most courageous things

ever seen in sports.

You really think that's that plane machine?

Oh, yes, I do.

I also think you should try and get up now. You can get up, can't you?

I'll try.

Please. I'll try.

Well, it appears our opponents like each other.

They obviously don't realize that winners cannot afford to make friends of

competition. And that's a mistake we're not about to make.

Right, Doc?

Winning is the only morality.

But just to ensure us an added edge, we shall make some small adjustments in our

friend's accommodation.

Tattoo, where have you been? I've been looking all over for you.

I've been all around the island, talking to people to fill this application.

Oh, yes.

I must have done about a hundred miles.

But he was worth it.

Now we don't have to worry about Patrick.

Really? You've got the right people for him already?

Why, that's fabulous. Who is the lucky couple?

Both.

Can I talk to you?

What about?

How about you?

How about you and me?

Tattoo?

I think I know what name is on that application.

This is my name.

I want Patrick.

You see, I thought about it.

I mean, what's the best for him?

Why not stay here with me? I mean, he loves me, and I love him.

Tattoo.

Do you actually feel ready for such a step as fatherhood?

It's a grave responsibility, you know.

I am, boss.

I mean, single people are adopting kids all over the place.

I see.

Boss?

Is it because of my size?

Oh, no, no, no, my friend, no.

Externals like size are not important, no.

Then I can be the man for the job.

I don't have to be a giant to have a big heart.

Patrick will always see me as somebody big, somebody tall.

Tattoo, if you devote the same amount of effort and diligence to Patrick as you

do to your job, then all I can say is... Congratulations.

Dad. But, you mean it. I can have Patrick.

Of course I mean it, if that's really what you want.

But, excuse me, but I've got to go. I've got to go tell Patrick.

But, today is the best day in my life. Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Our lean -to's also collapsed, but we can use some of these palm fronds and

extra shelter. But, Olaf, I need hands. Come on.

Olaf!

Olaf,

you can't leave!

I want to go home!

Olaf, get back here, Olaf!

Oh, there you are. I've been looking everywhere for you.

Olaf built a lean -to for us.

I can't go through with it, Gretch.

I'm so tired my hair hurts.

And the tough events are tomorrow.

It's just no use.

Funny, Kelly.

That is not the kind of talk I want to hear from a woman who hit two grand slam

home runs at the company picnic.

The picture was full of beer.

And you were full of beans.

I mean, what happened to them?

What are your beans now?

Beans don't win marathon.

Muffles do.

And Eugene, Sir Freddy, and that creep Bruno got all of them.

Oh, sure.

And you're just a feeble, dumb old woman, only good for cooking, cleaning,

opening cans.

I never said that.

I mean, after all, none of the guys at the factory did doodly about trying to

save the business.

Took us two women to think of that.

And now it's going to take one of us, you, to pull it off.

And all I hear, all I hear is...

I can't do it. My muscles aren't big enough.

Well, they aren't.

Look.

Oh, honey, it's not beef that wins marathons. It's endurance.

And there ain't a man alive who could put up with as much as the littlest

in the world.

And if you don't believe me, just imagine some muscle man carrying around

for nine months.

Yeah, I guess we do have stamina.

Right on, sister.

And guts. Don't you forget that.

Okay, you got me.

I'll give it my best shot in the morning.

And when loser pass out, those yahoos are gonna know they've been in a race

a woman.

Aw, that's my champ.

But I heard.

Now go get them, should I, huh?

Come on, you can do it.

Okay.

Big beaver barbells, remember.

I heard what you said.

You were magnificent.

Eh, wasn't that great?

Yes, you were. No, I wasn't. Yes, you were.

Hey, what are you doing out here, spying on me?

Oh, I wasn't spying. I was taking care of you.

In case some jungle animal would come out at night.

Taking care of me?

Olaf, I'm sorry.

I am.

It was really very nice of you.

How about walking me to the

lean -to?

Okay. I mean, just in case Bigfoot decides to come out of the jungle or

something, huh?

Patu, can I take Patrick for a walk?

Not right now. But if you don't mind, can you refill your bottle, please?

But when I come back, can I see if Patrick needs a change?

Maybe, if you're really careful.

Oh, Tatu, I'm so happy for you.

Me too.

I'm sure Patrick will make you a proud father.

I hope so.

With me not working yet, I couldn't afford to buy him anything, so I...

I made this myself.

I hope it's okay.

Oh, it's beautiful.

I'm sure that's going to be the best present you ever had.

Congratulations again on becoming a father.

I bet you're going to make a great daddy.

I hope so.

Mary, can I ask you a question?

You have a lot of kids.

What does that mean to you to be a parent?

Gee,

that's a tough one, Tattoo.

Well... I guess for starters, it's the most wonderful job I've ever had.

Um, maybe I can explain that a bit better. A long time ago when Kiko was

little boy, he got lost at the Fantasy Island Carnival.

Oh, we looked for him everywhere.

Well, finally I found him and he was crying his heart out.

He was so lost and alone.

Well, Tattoo, when he looked up and saw me,

Well, the expression on his face would have told you everything there is to

about being a mother.

Mary, that's a beautiful story.

Thank you both.

The time has come.

Are you marked?

Up there, Bundy! Go!

Bruno! Up, up, up!

Get up there!

You're doing great, baby!

brother Tommy he's back home on our side of the island anyway he needed some new

shoes so he could start the first grade I mean I thought the glove was all what

you wanted to have I don't mind really Tommy's my brother and someday when I'll

need something maybe Tommy will help me out that's what being a family is all

about

Maybe money is not everything after all.

Now with Sir Freddy and Conchata out of the competition, the race for the hang

lighters is on.

And it looks like Eugene is gaining a lead from up here. Okay, what do I do?

into your harness. How?

Like this.

Okay, I can figure it out.

Good luck, Eugene.

Thanks.

Get lost, sister. This ain't no place for a baby.

Oh, really?

Well, the list of the clean machine is first up.

there goes Bruno. A perfect takeoff. Bruno is using a scientifically

glider designed by Dr. Funk himself to accommodate Bruno's great bulk.

There goes Bunny Kelly. She's on the edge.

Look at that cliff looming up. I want to tell you hand gliding can be through

with vital if you don't know what you're doing.

Wait, she's having second thoughts.

But can you blame her? Look at that cliff.

But she looks determined. There she goes.

And there she goes.

Bunny Kelly took a tremendous risk in this event, folks.

Molensk is now taking off. Something is wrong with his glider. It's folding up.

Onward. Two to go.

That'll put him out of the competition.

That'll leave only Gratz, Bodine, and Kelly winging their way down to the next

event.

Eugene Boudin, in for a perfect glance.

Then here comes little funny Kelly.

She seems to be a little off target.

No, no, she's going to make it.

Incredible.

I did it. I did it. I really did it.

I don't believe it.

And there they go, off on the grueling run to the obstacle course.

Bunny Kelly is battling incredible odds, ladies and gentlemen.

Little Bunny Kelly from Beaver Ball, VA.

That too.

You were supposed to be at the house an hour ago for the signing of the adoption

paper. I know, boss, but I wanted to be away.

I wanted to be by myself.

But doesn't the signing of those papers mean a great deal to you?

Yes, it does.

It does, but I don't think I'm ready to sign them now.

Oh, well, I understand if you're nervous.

Anyone would be if you were about to become a father.

Oh, it's not that bad.

Well, then what exactly is troubling you, Tatooine? Well, you remember when I

told you that... Here on Fantasy Island, I could give Patrick everything he

needed. Of course I remember.

Here we can give the boy everything money can buy.

Fine house to live in, the best schools to go to, and all the luxuries we can

bestow on him.

Boss, I was wrong. I told that all the things money could buy were the

things.

There is something I cannot give Patrick.

What is it?

Yes, I must admit, there is no substitute for a mother's love, even

Fantasy Island.

Boss, I love Patrick more than anything in the whole world.

But he needs a home. Every kid needs a home.

I know that because I'm a kid.

When the others used to kid me around, I knew I could go home.

My mother never made any difference between my brother or sisters.

She made me happy. She made me feel good.

She made me feel like I belong.

I want the same thing about you.

I see.

Do you have a particular family in mind, Tattoo?

Maybe.

I don't want to give him away.

But I want what's best for him.

But I'm all mixed up.

I don't know. What should I do?

Well, it is said that the greatest difficulty we have in our lives...

is making choices.

And I'm afraid, my friend, that this choice is for you and you alone to make.

they go, deep into the twisting, rough, dangerous jungle trail, which will lead

them to a final 100 -yard dash for victory.

Now, since we cannot maintain camera coverage and the dense overgrowth, we

wait for them at the finish line. So hold your breath and wish them luck.

They're all game and formidable competitors.

I believe this is the correct path to victory. What about the others?

Sure, Mr. Rourke will send out a search party for them.

After all, it is a nasty bit of jungle they mistakenly ran into.

Well, it looks like a clean machine now. There's a clear path to the finish

line. Yes, with only a short distance to go.

Wait, what is this? Bunny Kelly's in trouble.

Eugene! Bunny, are you all right?

I don't believe it. Eugene Bodine. Victory within his grasp.

Go ahead, Eugene. I can't hop that far.

Oh, neither can I.

Hey,

wait a minute.

Maybe we can make it together.

Strange, this should be Bruno's big opportunity to win the race. But he's

nowhere to be seen.

There's something wrong.

We should have been at a finish line by now.

Ah, there we go.

The roar of the crowd, my boy.

Triumph awaits us behind yonder boat.

What do you mean, kiddie, kiddie, kiddie?

Go for it.

Will you look at this? They are pooling their resources.

This is incredible, folks.

The Fantasy Island Marathon is going to be won by Fongine and Kelly together.

May I present this trophy?

You both are very well deserving.

Hello, Tattoo. Hi.

I see you're already back to go home.

Yes.

We're going to miss you.

And I will miss you, Tattoo.

Wait, Keiko. Wait for me. Oh, they've already gone back to our island.

I stayed behind because I wanted to thank you and Mr. Rourke before I left.

If you hadn't let me come here and work when my Thomas got hurt, I don't know

what we would have done to make ends meet.

The both of us were very happy to do so.

Wait. Wait. Mary, sit down.

a personal question.

Sure.

Would you... Would you... Would you share yourself with Patrick?

Well, you know how you and Thomas wanted to adopt Patrick and you were afraid to

do so because you thought you couldn't afford it.

Yes.

You have so much to offer for him.

Much more than anything money can buy.

You understand?

Oh, Tattoo.

You're so wonderful.

Well, ready to leave, Mary? Oh, yes. I'm just waiting for Tattoo. Oh, where is

Tattoo? Well, he's in his room. He wanted to say goodbye to Patrick alone.

Oh, I see.

Mr. Roark, how did you always know he was going to give us the baby?

Well, I felt he would after he had thought it over. You see, Tattoo is a

kind man.

And I always knew he would do what was really best for the baby.

Patrick, you don't know what I'm saying now.

But someday you will.

This letter will tell you how I feel.

You see, son, life can be really hard sometimes.

Things can happen that you don't think fair.

I know about them.

Everybody does.

It happened to all of us.

The worst time I went in goes wrong, and you're all alone with nobody to help

you. And so, Patrick, that's the story of what happened while you were here.

And so, always remember that everything I have is yours, and anything you

want will be yours.

I will always love you, and you can always come here and have a home with

Remember that.

I love you, Patrick.

Goodbye.

Hi, Patrick.

Put this over here.

There you are.

Now you're going to come with me.

I don't know how to thank you and tattoo Mr. Rourke.

Not only do we have the prize money, the trophy, and the publicity, but we also

have each other.

Big Beaver Barbells has saved Mr.

Rourke. Thank you.

And I, too, am saved, Mr. Rourke, because I have Gretchen. Oh, and I'm

too, you big meatloaf.

Oh.

Goodbye, Mr. Rourke. Thank you.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Bye, treasure. Journey home. Thank you.

Well, my friend, shouldn't we wave goodbye to our other fantasizer?

Patrick, but he's already gone.

Almost. But perhaps there's still time for one final look, if we hurry.

Always remember I love you.