Original subtitles

Welcome to our show.

Ah, good afternoon, Susie. Mr. French, is Uncle Bill home yet? Yes, I believe

he's in your room with Buffy and Jody.

Well, these are very nice compositions, kids.

The teacher put Buffy's on the bulletin board with all the best ones.

Yeah. He would have put Jody's on the board, too, if the bulletin board was

larger.

Uncle Bill?

What? May I bring an out -of -town friend home for midterm vacation?

I thought all the kids went home.

Well, they do, but Kathy has no family.

and nowhere to go.

She lives in the dorm, and nearly everybody else is taking off, so she'll

practically alone.

Oh, well, is that okay? Can you manage if she brings the girl home?

Certainly, sir.

We'll do our utmost to make her comfortable.

I don't mind either.

Will I have to move out, Sissy?

Well, I was hoping that maybe you could sleep in the den.

She can sleep in my room, and I can sleep in the den with the TV set.

Very generous.

I think so, too.

Oh, by the way, Kathy's married.

See, her husband's in the Navy, and that's why she doesn't have a home to go

Now she has ours.

Well, I settled that.

Oh, there's one more thing.

Kathy's going to have a baby.

Yeah? How soon?

Well, it's nothing to worry about now.

Not for six more weeks.

Oh, that's no problem.

No, sir.

Good. I'll call Kathy and tell her.

Thank you, Uncle Bill.

I remember when we had nowhere else to go.

I'm almost moved.

Me too.

This is like playing checkers with everything we own.

Is Mrs. Beasley sleeping on my bed?

She has. Us two, Jody.

She sleeps wherever I sleep.

Boy, if the guys ever find out.

They won't. Only for a week. And I won't say anything.

Hi, Jody. I'm fixing up the room real good for you. Thanks, Emily.

Bed's nice and soft.

Madam. Yeah, Funchy.

Madam, the kitchen floor needs waxing.

Well, I was just showing Jody here how it's not such a bad deal living in here.

Well, Jody's fully aware of that. He's stayed in the den before.

I know, but you never bounced on the bed, Mr. Frank.

He forgot this.

Thanks, Buffy.

Well, finish up, children, will you? Because I think Sissy and her guest will

here shortly.

I wonder what Kathy's going to be like.

I never knew anybody who was going to have a baby before.

Well, I think Kathy will be just about like anybody else.

Having a baby is a normal thing.

Mrs. Turner, I'm sure you have much more important things to do than just stand

there and discuss impending motherhood.

Well, don't knock motherhood, Buster.

I mean, I'm a mother too, you know.

If you kids want to know anything about babies, you ask Emily Turner.

They'll do no such thing.

Well, after you too, Mr. French. You're not a mother, but you used to be a baby.

Ouch, ouch.

Now, Mrs. Tanner, I fail to see the propriety of bringing the whole matter

the open.

Well, let me clue you in, Frenchy.

Once Kathy is here, the whole matter is going to be in the open.

Yes, yes, and I'm afraid I'm distressed at the thought of that young lady being

around the children.

Why?

Why? Madam, when you finished your baseball practice, the kitchen floor

needs waxing?

This glove could use a little oiling, too.

Oh, what a lovely room, Sissy.

Sit down.

And thank you all for helping me. Oh, it's just all part of the family

hospitality for VIP gifts.

That's right, honey.

Any friend of Sissy's is a friend of all of us, David.

Oh,

we trust you'll be comfortable, Mrs. Prentice.

Thank you, Mr. French.

And thank you, Buffy, for lending me your half of the room.

Hey, you kids are awful quiet.

Usually they're rapping all over this place.

What's the matter with you?

Nothing. We just don't know what to talk about.

They've never been this close to somebody who's pregnant.

We didn't think you'd be a kid just like Sissy.

Well, I am.

Is your husband really in the Navy?

Mm -hmm. Walt's on an aircraft carrier.

I got toy flattop. You want to see it?

Hi, Uncle Bill. Hi.

Well, is this a private conversation here, or can anybody get in? No, come on

in. Kathy, this is the Uncle Bill. Uncle Bill, Kathy Prentiss. Thank you for

letting me stay.

We've always got room for one more.

Hi, Mr. Davis.

Did you have a nice day?

Yeah, how are you?

Hi. Mrs. Tanner, you do have other duties to perform, do you not?

No, but I'm sure you'll think of some things.

I'll see you later.

You make yourself at home, Kathy.

Boy, am I tired.

I seem to be tired all the time now.

Well, don't worry. You'll get plenty of rest here.

Excuse me.

Stay put and I'll finish your unpacking.

I've told you my flat top in here.

I don't know. I didn't see it.

You know, I've been thinking.

It can't be much fun to have a baby.

I was playing with it the other day.

Kathy feels awful tired.

Sissy never gets tired.

I found it.

Hey, Frenchy.

Yes, ma 'am.

How long do you say it is till the baby comes?

Another six weeks from what I've been told.

Well, I'd say it's about a week to ten days.

Based on your authority as a mother, I presume.

Well, you could just bet your beard on it.

Speaking as the mother of an intern.

Ready to go to sleep?

Good night.

Uncle Bill, could we talk to you?

Who, me and Jody?

No, me and Mrs. Beasley.

Okay, who's going to talk first?

What we want to know, is it worth all that trouble?

Is what worth all the trouble?

Having a baby.

Oh, no, I don't think it's any trouble.

Probably because you're a man and you didn't notice.

Well, you might be right there.

What didn't I notice?

Well, Kathy gets awfully tired all the time. And she needs lots of rest.

And she has to be extra careful about everything she does.

She can't act regular like Sissy and have fun.

Oh, well, that's not trouble, honey. That's, uh... Any woman's gonna have a

baby.

She's gotta take special care of herself.

But Kathy isn't a woman.

She's just a girl like Sissy.

Well, she might be a little younger than most mothers, but she's still... She's

very happy. She's going to have a baby.

I guess she has to be happy, because she can't help it.

But I feel awfully sorry for her.

You don't have to feel sorry for her.

I guess she thinks it's worth it.

Now, your mother thought it was worth it to have you.

I hope so.

Thanks, Uncle Bill.

I don't think I convinced you too well, did I?

That's okay.

You probably convinced Mrs. Beasley.

Sleep tight.

Sissy? Sissy?

Sissy, please wake up.

What's the matter?

I think I'm going to have a baby.

Well, I know you are.

Oh, my goodness.

Don't move. I'm going to get Uncle Bill.

All right, all right.

Uncle Bill.

Uncle Bill. What? Forgive me for bothering you. Kathy.

No, no, Kathy.

It's the baby. It's coming now.

Oh, Uncle Bill, I'm so sorry. It was supposed to be for six more weeks.

You always get it in the writing.

Thank you, Doctor.

Yes, we'll bring her to the hospital directly.

Goodbye, sir.

Oh, they'll be waiting for her, sir.

Okay, come on.

I'm going too, Uncle Joe. I know, I'm coming.

Hey, what's happening?

Where's everybody going?

We're taking Kathy to the hospital.

But I thought I was a long time away.

So did I.

We'll be back later.

Couldn't the baby wait till morning instead of waking us all up?

Well, I'm afraid the baby doesn't have much to say in these matters.

Babies are sure a lot of trouble.

Well, now, may I suggest that we return to our beds?

If you please, Mr. French, we want to stay up and wait for Sissy and Uncle

to come home.

Yeah, to see if it's a boy or what.

Well, they may be at the hospital all night, and you're far too young to keep

such hours.

But the baby's even younger than us, and he's keeping on.

Your uncle will let you know.

Even if we went to bed, we couldn't go to sleep.

Very well.

You know, I must confess to being somewhat anxious myself. Come on.

Think they'll come and tell us right away?

As soon as they got something to tell.

I'll contact the Red Cross, and then they can get in touch with Walt.

Sure.

The suspense is unbearable.

Sure is.

Uncle Bill, how can you just sit there?

Well, not much else we can do.

You sure have a ton of patience.

Well, you're in there and I'm sitting out here with your husband.

There won't be any ton of patience.

Well, thank you for being here.

For now and for later.

wake all this time? Uh -huh. Is it all over?

Yep, it's all over.

What did we have?

We had a girl.

A girl? Uncle Bill, do you have the feeling they're starting to outnumber

Oh, she's darling.

She weighs five pounds and eleven ounces.

I guess that sweater will fit her all right.

Everybody to bed. Come on.

I'm terribly sorry. I should have, but I missed it.

Just dozed off. You just dozed off a long time ago, Mr. French.

It's a girl, Mr. French.

Mr.

French, if we're having...

Breakfast at lunchtime. Will we be having lunch at dinnertime?

Maybe we'll never catch up.

We shall make every endeavor to catch up, Buffy.

And have dinner on time.

Kathy sounds wonderful.

I'm going to go visit her this evening.

Can we too?

No, they won't let kids in there, Buffy. You have to be over 16 to go in the

hospital.

Boy, they run a hospital like they do some movies.

Yep.

where Kathy and the baby are going to go?

When they come out of the hospital?

Well, I don't know, Uncle Bill.

She can't go back to the dorm.

She can't do that? I mean, where was she going to go if the baby had come on

time?

I don't know that either. I don't think she'd really made any plans.

If I may say so, that's the trouble with young people. They never plan beyond

today.

I'm planning on going to the circus next Saturday.

I'm planning on going with him.

Excuse me, us.

Well, I'm glad you two got your feet on the ground.

Now, what about Kathy?

Do you think she could stay here?

Just until she finds a place.

That's a pretty tall order, you know.

I know, Uncle Bill, but she's so alone.

I guess it'll be okay temporarily, what do you think?

Naturally, there's no problem to them residing here temporarily, sir.

But I believe that a newborn infant needs a certain amount of care and

attention.

And, sir, although I'm extremely devoted to this family, well, sir, I absolutely

draw the line on being an infant nanny. I'm just not equipped for it.

You got something there?

Hey, Frenchie, where'd you hide the ammonia?

I can't do them windows unless I got some ammonia.

I'm sorry, we're fresh out of ammonia, madam.

Well, put it on the list, will you? I mean, unless you don't care about

through the windows.

How would you like to be a baby nurse for a while?

Me?

Mrs. Turner.

That's a great idea, Uncle Bill.

Kathy and the baby are going to come back and stay here.

A little while.

Why, gee, I don't know.

I've never been a nurse before.

Emily, a nurse is just a mother in a white uniform.

But, sir, we'd have to make entirely different sleeping arrangements.

Oh, well, there's nothing to that.

I mean, Jody can move in with his uncle, and you can bunk in the den, and the

baby and I'll hole up in your room.

Thank you.

Welcome, Mrs. Francis.

Thanks, Mr. Francis. It's nice to have a home to come to. Can we see the baby?

Of course.

Now, hold it. Are your hands clean?

Their hands are always clean, madam.

Well, they really should be wearing masks.

Don't you want the baby to know us?

The masks are to protect against germs, Buffy.

Well, we'll just look, but we won't breathe.

Now, one quick peek.

It's so small.

What's the baby's name?

We haven't decided yet.

Come on, Kathy, you'd better lie down.

If the baby doesn't have a name, what'll we call it?

You don't have to call it anything.

You can't play with it like you can Mrs. Beasley.

Well, I'm afraid the baby didn't quite meet their expectations, son. Well, I

never saw a brand new baby before. They'll get used to it.

Yes, sir.

No doubt we all will.

The baby's sleeping.

She was sleeping when we left this morning.

She's always sleeping.

Yeah, well, that's the way it goes with little folks, but you're going to have

to be quiet so she won't wake up.

Yes, ma 'am.

Yes, ma 'am.

Do you think we can go in the kitchen and get some milk and cookies?

Yeah, if you're real quiet about it.

They're very soft cookies.

Uh -oh.

Did we do that, Buffy?

Maybe we tiptoed too loud.

Can we have some milk, Mr. Furch? And cookies?

Yes, you may help yourself, but with discretion.

As you can see, I'm chief cook and bottle washer now.

and milk, Mr. French.

But we still want some cookies, if they're not baby cookies.

No, they're not. Take a few, not too many.

More diapers.

What, more nappies?

Not nappies.

Diapers.

Diapers. Why can't you Englishmen learn how to speak English?

Don't we subscribe to a nappy service?

No. The young mother would insist on paying and she can't afford it. So I am

handling the diaper business.

Madam, the bathroom's already overstrung.

Well, that's all right. I'll just put up a line on the terrace.

What, nappies waving in the breeze on Mr. Davis's terrace? Oh, no, this is

terrible.

More trouble.

I told you, that's what babies seem to be good for.

Oh, may I have a word with you?

May I have a word with you, madam?

You're in luck. I'm between feedings.

May I retrieve a book from my room, please?

You mean the nursery?

Very well. The nursery.

No, you can't come in. You're not sterile.

I merely wish to retrieve a book, not to perform surgery.

May we assist you?

Well, I'm Walt Prentiss. I came to pick up my family.

Oh, well, please come in.

Congratulations.

My apologies.

Congratulations.

Oh, you're like Pensacola. I've been there a lot of times.

I'm so happy that Walt has shore duty, I wouldn't care what the place was like.

As long as we're together.

Yeah, the three of us.

All wrapped up and ready to go.

Here we are.

I can't thank you enough for everything.

Well, try then.

For a girl who came to spend midterm vacation, I've put you through an awful

lot.

We survived, though.

We always do.

Well, sir, thank you and goodbye. Take care now.

Now, don't forget to write when you think of an A. You'll be the first ones

know.

See, Buffy?

She just fit.

Isn't she beautiful?

He keeps saying that.

Well, goodbye.

Bye -bye. Thank you.

Bye -bye. Bye -bye.

Uncle Bill, now I know what babies are good for.

What's that?

They make grown -ups real happy.

Well, so do big kids.

Big kids like Buffy and me?

Sure.

Thanks for watching. See you next week on Family Affair.