Original subtitles

little off the top.

Why? Most of it's on the bottom. And don't cut my ears off. Could you just

relax? This is going to be a work of art.

Sit still, okay?

Well, well.

What have we here?

Art. Hmm. What do you say? Uh, Warren Beatty?

No, no. I was thinking more Robert Redford, you know? Robert Redford?

Sure. Yeah.

Well, look at his profile.

See, it's, it's Redford, all right.

Are you kidding?

Nicholas does not have a red foot head. I mean, with his coloring, he should

have curls.

You mean an afro?

Sort of. Kind of like a James Caan look, you know? Oh, sort of soft curl.

Right.

No, no, James Caan isn't Nicholas. Yeah, of course he is, if I could just

remember the name of it. Hey, would you hold on a minute? I'm the one giving the

haircut, remember? Oh, yeah, well, I'm the one who saw James Caan in the movie

version that I can't remember the name of. Okay, let's ask Nicholas what he

wants. Fine.

Hey, where'd he go?

Hey, Nicholas!

Nicholas, come back! I promise I won't give you an afro!

Nicholas! Oh, come back!

There's a magic in the early morning we found

When the sunrise smiled on every...

Oh,

it is enough to fill our lives with love.

Oh, we'd spend our days like bright and shiny new dimes.

If we're ever bothered by the changing times.

There's a place.

And it is enough to fill our...

Nancy! Yeah?

Nancy, get your nude self into this house immediately.

But, Daddy... Don't but -daddy me. Just get in here right away.

All I took off was my top.

You call that nude?

I call it disgraceful. Well, you've got more blouses in this house than anybody

else. Unless you're in a bubble bath or the shower, I want you to wear one. Do

you understand?

I was just getting a tan for my job.

Oh, now don't tell me that the health food restaurant has gone topless.

Of course not, Daddy.

But my boss at Avocado Sunrise wants all the waitresses to look as healthy as

the food, and he says strap marks clash with the sandwiches.

Just because your employer has overdosed on alfalfa sprouts, there's no reason

to disgrace the family with semi -nakedness.

I was in the privacy of my own backyard.

Correction, the privacy of my backyard where my daughters stay dressed.

Daddy, you're a prude. Better all prude than half nude.

Nicholas, you weren't hiding in the backyard, were you?

Heck no.

I was at the playground.

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bark at you. Oh, it's all right.

Nancy, how short do you have to be to be a shrimp?

Gee, I don't know the exact figures. I guess pretty short.

Why?

Well, today at the playground, we were playing basketball, see, and while we

were choosing up teams, everyone got picked except me, and they called me a

shrimp. Oh, they did, huh?

Well, you shouldn't listen to cruel kids like that. You know, you're better off

that they didn't pick you.

Oh, yeah? That's easy for you to say. You're taller than any of them.

Nicholas, you're only inches away from tallness.

That's restricted parking?

Oh, yes. This driveway, which is now oil -free after hours of hard labor, is

definitely off -limits to you and your traveling oil slick.

Oh, no, Dad. I just fixed the leak.

Oh. You know, you must spend more time underneath that beast than in it.

No, don't, don't, don't, don't. She's very sensitive.

Hey, remember this? Oh, yes. That was my Christmas present of 76, reported

missing spring of this year. That's right.

Now it's home safe and sound. Oh, thank you. Since when does construction work

require a tie and a jacket?

Well, it does when you're having lunch with the president of the biggest

contracting firm in town. Wow.

Now you're getting smart.

Well, didn't you always say that one of the first steps to being a success was

looking like one?

Uh, yes, I did say that. I think it was either me or Ben Franklin may have said

it. But both of us said that impressing bosses with what you wear is not as

important as what you drive.

Ben Franklin said that? Oh, yes. Ben Franklin said that.

Clark! Who are you? Who am I? I should be asking that question. This is my

house. You must be Mr. Bradford.

I'm Danny Wise.

Boy, what a real honor. I read your column every day.

Well, I hope you read the one that I'm writing now. It's about the plague of

nudity invading my house.

Oh, Dad, you don't understand at all. She's not the nude stranger. His name's

Danny. He happens to be my tennis partner, and he was hot and sweaty.

So am I, under the collar. Oh, good grief. Dad, he was just taking a shower.

Susan, do I have to remind you about the rules of allowing men up on the second

floor in the vicinity of bedrooms?

Dad, they don't even have those rules in colleges anymore.

Right, that's their problem.

Dad, don't you think you're overdoing this torture bit a little? I mean, he

five minutes ago. There's nobody upstairs now.

That's not the point. The point is, suppose Elizabeth were to go upstairs

see a strange man walking around with a towel wrapped around him. Well, knowing

Elizabeth, there'd probably be nothing left but the towel.

Susan, I would appreciate a little more discretion on your part when it comes to

allowing strange men, sweaty or not, to use the bathroom, our family bathroom,

to take a shower. Okay, Dad.

You know, our house is not a locker room.

Get the message, all right?

Good.

Thought you would.

Phew.

Think we'll ever get him into the 20th century?

How could we get him out of the 18th?

So I... told him it was no Porsche complex.

Women make better lawyers because they're more emotionally aware.

Speaking of emotions, I think I've missed you.

Emotion approved.

What's wrong?

Wait a minute. Let me guess. A plea this time. Ritz of negative gasoline?

No, no. I've got over half a tank.

Let me get out and check the engine.

I'll take a second.

Promise?

Promise.

Joanie, you never look more beautiful.

Oh, yeah, thank you. You have a big date, huh? Oh, just a casual one.

We're going to a party. Anybody I know?

Just a friend from the theater.

Oh, an onstage friend or a backstage friend?

Oh, what is this, a third degree?

Come on, you always used to tell me all about your dates.

Well, I guess I'm just in a hurry, Dad, okay?

Why don't you bring him in? You always used to let me meet your boyfriends.

Dad, he's 25 years old.

I can't ask a 25 -year -old man to come in and meet my father.

Besides, I thought I was past the parental approval phase.

Well, I was just trying to be friendly.

Oh, Dad, you want to be friendly, just let me go with my friends, okay?

Hey, it'll only be a few more minutes.

Promise?

Promise.

Well, don't rush on my account. I've already finished O 'Reilly vs.

New Jersey, read three chapters on tort.

This has been one of our more productive days.

Besides, the restaurant closed a half hour ago.

Oh, it's you, Abby. Gee.

I rolled over for a hug and I came up with nothing but moonlight.

I'm sorry.

I had a hard time falling asleep, so I figured I'd come down here and fix

some warm milk.

Oh.

Are you waiting up for Joanie?

No.

What is 3 o 'clock in the morning?

She is 21 years old.

Does that give her a right to stay out to all hours in the morning?

Tom, I have a terrible confession to make once.

When I was 21 years old, I stayed up till 5 in the morning.

All right, go ahead and make fun of me. I'm just trying to be a good father.

No.

I love you for it.

That makes two of us.

And eight of them.

Morning, family.

Have you seen Joanie?

No, I just got up while we were... Dad, I'm sure she's okay.

Yeah, she's very self -reliant. Yeah, she has a good sense of direction.

Oh, the prodigal daughter has returned.

Hi, Joanie. Hi.

Hi, Dad, I'm really sorry.

Really.

I hate to admit it, but the guy that I went to the party with left with another

girl and I didn't have a ride, so I stayed overnight at the house where the

gave the party.

I left it on the floor, obviously.

Why didn't you call?

Oh, I wanted to, really. I did. It's just that it was so late, you know, and

didn't want to wake everyone in the house.

Well, I was just trying to be considerate, Dad.

A considerate person would have realized there's people at home worrying about

her. Don't worry when I don't call.

Worry when I do call.

Dad, I think she's old enough to take care of herself.

Yeah, you act like you don't even trust your own daughters. That's not the

issue. We have house rules here. If you're going to live in my house, then

will adhere by my rules.

One of them is that if you're going to be out late, you call, especially when

late is the morning after.

Dad,

don't you think it's time you respected us as adults?

When you're considerate of the people that you live with, then I will respect

you as an adult.

Okay, Dad, okay.

No, it's not okay.

I don't consider this incident to be another insignificant transgression that

can easily be overlooked.

Dad, I... I said I'm sorry, and I promise it won't happen again.

That's right, it won't happen again.

Not in the near future, anyway, because for the next three weeks, you're

grounded.

Grounded?

Grounded.

Can you believe it? A 21 -year -old woman grounded by her father.

Yeah, I can believe it. He's been building up to something like this for

I'd have half a mind just to pick up and move out.

Yeah, well, that kind of move would require half a mind.

Really, Jolie, I mean, the only thing more ridiculous than a 21 -year -old

being grounded is a 21 -year -old woman running away from home.

Well, I'd rather spend the rest of my life in a park bench than under the

hand of Generalissimo Bradford.

Be realistic. Now, what kind of a place can you afford on $58 a week?

The kind of place that would require $58 worth of insecticide.

Really, you guys face facts on our incomes. We're just going to have to

way to cope.

Or to co -op.

What are you talking about?

A cooperative.

I mean, yeah.

Listen, we all want to get out from under the iron sun, right? And none of

can afford to move out on our own.

But what if we pooled our little incomes together?

Hold on, Joanie. I'm only bringing home $60 a week from the daycare center.

I know, but with my $58 from the theater and what Nancy makes... Joanie, wait a

minute. I mean, you're forgetting the first rule of renting. I mean, you have

make in a week what you pay per month. I mean, we'd never find a furnished two

-bedroom apartment we'd like for less than $250.

Wait a minute. What about my $100 a week with tips, your $58 and your $60?

That's what, almost $220?

Yeah, there you go. That's close enough.

You guys, I mean, you really think we can pull this thing off?

I mean, you get along with each other? Hey, we've lived together all our lives,

right? I say we give it a try. I mean, what have we got to lose?

Chains.

Flavoring. Tyranny.

Hey, that sounds pretty good, you guys. Okay, one more time. All right.

Chains.

Flavoring.

Tyranny.

Hey, Nicholas, come on, man. Look alive. You're supposed to be helping me clean

this place up.

I will.

Tommy, how can I get taller?

You're asking me how to get taller? I'm not exactly what you'd call tall, bud.

I know, but at least you're average.

No, I'm only average when it comes to things that I can't control. After that,

I'm way above average.

Tommy, you think I'm exactly what you'd call short?

Well, for an adult, maybe, yes. But for a nine -year -old kid, you're hanging

right in there.

Oh, yeah?

Well, how come for everyone else in this family, when they were my age, they

were a lot taller?

Uh, well, number one, girls are always taller at that age. And number two, you

shouldn't go comparing yourself to other people.

When people start calling you shrimp, you start taking a look at yourself.

Gee, I got called shrimp plenty of times when I was your age, until I was about,

oh, 13.

Then my hormones kicked in, and up I went the rest of history.

You mean I have to wait till I'm 13?

Well, it happens sooner with some people, but it depends on the hormones.

Hey, you guys busy?

Oh, Dad put us on garage detail, but we could use an escape clause.

All right. Well, I thought you might want to come with me to pick out a new

of wheels.

New wheels? David, you're buying a new car?

Yeah. All right, let's go. Come on.

Yeah, and on the way, can we stop for some hormones?

Hormones?

Dave, you're going to love that, baby.

We'll have yours for you in six weeks.

Six weeks? Wait a minute. I was hoping I'd get it right away.

Yeah, well, we're going to have some delivery problems from Detroit.

Oh, well, I've waited this long. What's six more weeks?

That's wonderful, Dave. We'll notify you the moment it arrives.

Oh, by the way, what are you planning on treating in your present vehicle?

Yeah, how much can I get for it?

Check it out.

That's a 62.

62.

Well, I'd be taking a loss, but I can let you have $300.

$300 for a classic?

I was counting on more than that.

Tell you what, Dave. Why don't you just think about it? I'll take care of the

order, and you can decide.

Okay?

Dave?

You're, uh, you're gonna love this once -in -a -lifetime special offer.

I will buy your, uh, present vehicle.

Where are you gonna get the $300?

Never underestimate my ability to score, Brad.

Now, wait a minute. I think you ought to talk to Dad first.

Well, Dad says I can buy a car anytime I can afford it. I'll drop a contract and

everything, and then I'll have $300 for you in full on the day that your wagon

arrives.

All right, all right. It's a deal, Tommy.

Oh, to make it, um, honest, Tommy.

Richard.

Okay, this is it. This is it.

Okay, quiet street, two bedrooms.

What do you think?

Well, at least it's a lot better than the last 14 places we looked at, huh?

Yeah, no broken windows, no great view of the garbage dump like that one for

125. Yeah, on the other hand, it's...

Doesn't have airline pilots in a swimming pool like the one for $560 a

Well, let's find out. Come on.

Okay.

And another thing, young ladies, I don't stand for no parties.

You got it. No parties.

That's a promise.

Look at all this sunlight, you guys. My plants would go crazy in here.

Plants are permitted.

Pets are nicked.

I see all the covered space in there. It is so fantastic.

If you play your music too loud, you'll be out before you can change the record.

Hey, no music, no music.

Hey, you guys, I can walk to work from here. Oh, yeah, me too, no problem.

I guess I'm going to have to find a bus stop. Oh, right around the corner, young

lady. Take any place you want to go.

Got an express to the racetrack to boot.

Oh, super. You know, I've always wanted to go to the racetrack.

half is good for $225. What do you think? Should we take it? It's okay by

What about you? Sounds good.

We like the apartment very much, Mrs. Dreesen. So, when do we sign?

As soon as you agree to my rules.

Rules? Oh, yeah, rules. Mrs. Dreesen, we know all about rules.

Yeah, nobody knows more about rules than we do.

All right, then it's yours.

Oh. Just as soon as I get my $525.

Your what?

$525. No, no, no.

You said it was only $225.

It is.

But before I hand out the keys, I get my first and last month's rent and $75

security deposit.

Oh, no.

Homework on Saturday?

Just a sec, Dan.

There. No, it's a contract.

Oh, no, don't tell me you're starting another sales venture. Oh, no, I'm not

selling this time. I'm buying. Buying what?

Well, David bought a new four -wheel drive, and I'm buying his van.

Buying the van?

Oh, that's right.

Wait a minute.

I think we should talk about this first.

Well, Dad, I thought we had some sort of an official agreement. You know, I

could buy any car of my choice as long as I could pay for it. Yes, but... But,

Dad, a deal is a deal. Besides that, I'm already bound to contract with David.

Oh, okay, okay.

Oh, I just cleaned the oil leaks off my driveway.

David, do you believe it? That landlady wants first and last month's rent in

advance. Not only that, she wants a security deposit, too. Yeah, isn't that

ridiculous?

No, no, no. I think it's lucky.

I had to leave all of that plus a $5 key deposit.

Oh, then you understand our financial situation?

Yeah, I'm afraid I do.

Based on the case of me versus my big brother.

I would say that your financial problem is about to become David's.

Oh, Janet.

Are we that obvious?

As David's almost attorney, I have to warn you, he just plunked down his life

savings on a new car.

A new car?

Well, not just a new car, a new image.

Oh, David, I don't know whether to clap for you or cry for us.

Oh, hey, come on, you guys, let's be big about this.

Congratulations, David.

Well, thanks.

Congratulations.

All right, well, seeing that my spirits are high and my resistance to beautiful

women is low, you may have what's left of my battered bank account.

David, really?

You mean you're offering us a loan for real?

Yeah. Oh, David.

Lifesaver, you. David Bradford, you're the best brother in Sacramento.

No, just the softest touch.

By the way, how's Dad taking all this?

Oh, at the moment, very calmly.

Calmly? Yeah.

We haven't told him yet.

Your what?

Taking our own apartment.

That's absurd.

You can't afford it. We haven't discussed it.

This is not the kind of thing that any mature person would even consider.

Oh, come on, Dad. We have considered it.

Carefully. We think it's about time we run our own lives.

What makes you think that you're even old enough to take on that kind of

responsibility?

What makes you think that I would even let you go?

Dad, it doesn't matter if you let us go or not. What do you mean, young lady?

I'm your father.

And we're legal adults.

Oh, legal adults. Don't make me laugh.

You can laugh or you can cry, Dad.

But we're moving out.

And you can't stop us, Dad.

Oh, not in a box. I'm interested.

All right, I'll take a second.

Hey, what are you guys? You think this will ever come back in style? Oh, let's

certainly open it.

That's because you have chubby knees.

Hey! Hi, may I come in? Oh, sure, Dad. Come on in.

I'll just be a minute, girls.

Listen, I've had time to cool down and give some thought.

Your clan, you know?

And I think that it's time that we just sit down and have a calm, rational, open

discussion.

Okay, Dad, as long as you're not trying to talk us out of it. We're not going to

change our minds, Dad.

We're moving out, Dad, and that's all there is to it. This isn't exactly the

open discussion I had in mind.

Oh, we're sorry, Dad, but your open discussions always run in the same

You dictate, we obey. All right, all right, I overreacted it, and I'm sorry.

realize that now, but, I mean, that's...

That doesn't give you reason to just desert the family. We've got a little

problem here. Let's work it out.

It's too late, Dad. We've already signed, sealed, and committed.

Oh, just like that. On a whim. On an impulse.

Oh, what do you want, Dad? An act of Congress?

Well... Yeah, Dad.

Didn't you hear? It is a fait accompli.

Okay, okay. But I hope you three girls realize that you're going to disqualify

yourself from some certain family privileges like cause.

Don't worry, Dad. We'll be living on the bus line.

Oh, well, money. Yes, and money, too. I mean, independence doesn't come cheap.

If you don't believe me, ask David. He knows how hard it is to make a living.

knows all about that.

Yeah, you know.

That's why he's lending us the money for the apartment.

He what?

I cannot believe that David would actually bankroll their insurrection.

he care about his own sisters?

David cares. He just recognizes something you don't. All three girls are

adults.

That says nothing about maturity. It means they can vote, not make decisions.

Did you hear what you just said?

I mean, sometimes, you know, Tom, I cannot believe your attitude. For a

journalist, you are really out of touch.

I don't know. What are you talking about?

I am talking about young people.

In case you haven't noticed, they are leaving home a little younger these

Whose side are you on, anyway?

Well, if I have to take five, I'm on your side, but then only because I love

you. Yeah, well, you're not being very supportive.

How was David when he left home? Oh, come on. David is different.

Yes? How is David different?

Well, I don't know. He's more responsible.

Oh, I see. Well, the girls are responsible.

Yeah, but David was always taking good care of himself. He always had a good

-paying job.

The girls have jobs. Well, he's a man.

Aha, the real reason.

No, no, come on. We've been over that a million times. You know I'm not a

sexist. No, you just don't want your little baby girls to leave home.

I don't want to talk about it anymore.

Do you know what I think?

I think you're more concerned about how this move will affect your life than

theirs. I don't want to talk about it anymore.

Good night.

Even though you're wrong, I love you.

Yes, Nicholas, this old bike sure means a lot to me.

And as a matter of pride, I'd kind of like to stay in the family.

That's why I'm offering you first crack at a great deal.

I think you've finally reached the point where you're ready to step up to a real

man's bike.

You really think so?

Yep. I sure do.

Now picture this.

You're coasting down that big hill that you've just conquered, and the wind is

whipping your hair, and the sun is just sinking below the horizon.

Isn't that beautiful?

Hey, and it can all be yours for an incredibly low cost of $20.

$20? All I got is fine, and most of that's in pennies.

Well, I'll tell you, I never discriminate when it comes to money.

That $5 will make a nice little down payment on this baby.

Down payment?

Yeah, and you can just pay the rest to me in easy weekly installments. Now you

just turn your allowance over to me, and this little gem will be all paid for

before you know it.

I don't know.

Nicholas, how can you afford to pass up a deal like this?

I mean, not only are you getting a great bike, but how many people?

Now, how many people get a chance to establish credit at the age of nine?

Thirty cents a day times three of us times seven days a week equals, okay, 6

,030 cents a week. Oh, look, don't forget to add in the curtains that I

They were so cute. How much do they cost?

Oh, 1995.

Nancy, don't you realize we're going to be on a shoestring budget? Yeah, you're

going to have to give up some luxury items, princess.

Yeah, like food.

Well, I'll bring home food from the restaurant.

Susan, wait till you taste the okra and bean curd salad.

Oh, sounds great.

Okay, what's next?

Oh, you three seem to be having such a good time.

Countdown to freedom. Yeah.

No more curfews. Lots of parties.

No one to tell you what to do. Yeah.

Oh, well.

It's more than that, Abby. I mean, this is really a chance for us to grow and

make some of our own decisions, you know?

Become women.

Yeah, we knew Dad wouldn't understand, but I kind of hoped you would.

I do.

I told my parents the same thing.

Oh, so you know what we're going through.

Of course I know what you're going through. It's just that, uh... I'll miss

guys a lot.

That's right, Abby.

The apartment's only four miles from here. Really?

It's not like Dad thinks at all.

The apartment's not split enough. It's just sort of subdivided. Yeah, you're

going to get rid of us that much. We'll be around for dinner.

You'll probably see more of us than you do now. I figured that.

Dad doesn't banish from the house.

This is David Bradford.

Mr. Foster, I wasn't expecting to hear from you for six weeks.

Yeah, well, you're in luck, Dave. The shipment came in early. Now, all I need

a check for the final balance, and you got your wagon.

Oh, how much do you need?

$277.

$277. Well,

there might be a problem.

When do you need it by?

Well, tomorrow, Friday the latest. I got 20 people on a waiting list, and I got

to move those babies out.

All right, well, I can try.

Well, if I were you, I'd try real hard because the next shipment may not be for

another six months.

Six months.

All right, all right, I'll let you know. Thank you.

Hey, Nicola!

Just wait a minute.

Oh, hey, hey.

How do you like your new bike?

It's bigger than I thought.

Oh, well, let me see you ride it.

I ride it loudly. I fall off great.

Why didn't you tell me sooner?

I didn't want to bother you.

Oh, it's no bother. That's what fathers were created for.

And guess what?

I think I have the solution.

Here, I'm going to make you king of the road yet.

I hope he knows what he's doing.

Here you are, Nicholas.

What do you think?

It's well, Dad.

Thanks. Oh, don't mention it. What's a father for? Okay, get up here.

I want you to give it a good try.

All right?

Go on.

Hey, champ.

Have a new, uh... Yeah, training wheels.

Dad, huh?

I can't let anyone see me with these things on my bike.

I know.

Sometimes dads forget what it's like growing up.

I tell you what. Let me take care of some business, and then I'll see what I

do, okay?

All right.

Okay.

Seven.

Eight.

Nine.

Ten.

Eleven.

Twelve. Hi, David. Hi.

Hey, what's going on?

I have some bad news for you.

I can't sell you my van.

What? Why not?

Well, not right now, anyway.

I won't be able to get my wagon for six months.

Well, but I thought that... What happened?

Well, the shipment came in early, and right now I don't have the money I need

get it.

Well, you had it yesterday.

Yeah, that was before I loaned it to the girls for their apartment.

So get it back.

No, they're counting on that money.

But I was counting on the van.

Tommy, both you and I can wait. The girls need that apartment.

I knew it was too good to be true.

Well, hi, you guys.

Gee, I was wondering if I should take all my shoes or maybe just a dozen pair.

You may not have to take anything, Nance.

We've got a problem.

No. What happened?

Did Dad call the police or something?

No.

It's not Dad. It's David.

David? Yep, David.

Hey, we're not supposed to know this, but he's $277 short on his new car.

what happened?

See, the shipment came in early, and the guy said that he... Well, anyway, the

point is that instead of asking us for the money back, David decided to wait

the new shipment. Oh, gosh, that's one sweet brother.

Wouldn't have even known about it if I didn't overhear Tommy ask Nicholas for

his bike back.

Oh, gee, that's not one sweet brother.

Well, uh...

Nan, Susan and I talked it over, and we thought... Well, what do you think? It

seems like the only right thing to do is give David his money back, whether he

wants it or not.

You mean no apartment?

Not at David's expense, Nan. No.

Hey, that's all right. We'll get another one. Oh, yeah?

Where are we going to find another furnished apartment for $225 a month,

With first and last month's rent?

On a bus line with no key deposit?

Well, I mean you want to remain in Bradford prison we may have to

You sound chipped this morning. Well, it's a beautiful day. The sun is

The birds are singing.

The girls don't have an apartment. The girls don't have an apartment. Yeah,

was a tough break.

Tom, I think your euphoria may be just a little bit premature because they're

out right now this afternoon looking for a new place.

Yes, I know. But you and I both know that they won't find one because they

have enough money.

Abby, I have decided that...

that there's going to be some changes. I recognize my excessiveness, and it's my

responsibility to mend the fences. Just because you're ready to make concessions

doesn't mean peace is at hand.

You'll see. This family has a great way of overcoming adversity.

We'll be a big, happy family again. Just watch.

Oh, surprise.

Oh, thanks. You're welcome.

Mary. Yeah, Nicholas.

Can I have a man -to -man talk with you?

Uh, well, I'll try to hold up my end of the bargain.

I need something from the hospital.

The hospital?

Uh, maybe we'd better sit down and talk this one over.

Here.

Uh, what is it that you need?

Hormones.

Hormones?

Nicholas, why in the world would you need hormones?

Do you even know what they are?

Well, not really.

I just know that I don't have any.

Oh, you're sure about that, huh?

Well, Tommy says when he started kicking it, he got real big. And I'm tired of

being called a shrimp.

Nicholas, you're not a shrimp. And I promise you that your body has just the

right amount of hormones.

Oh, yeah?

And how come I'm too short to play basketball? And I need training wheels

new bike.

Nicola, she might be short now, okay? But in a couple of years, this thing

called a pituitary gland sees in the back of your head.

Pituitary?

Pituitary.

Pituitary, uh -huh. See, and it sends out hormones all through your body,

And when that happens, well, then you start to grow faster.

And along with that come a few other changes.

Like what?

Well, if I tell you, it'll spoil the surprise.

Are you sure I won't be a shrimp all the rest of my life? Oh, I'm positive of

that. Mary, when I start to get taller, can you explain the other things that's

going to happen to me?

Um, I think we'll let Dad handle that, okay?

If you say so.

I think so.

Oh, what a day. If I hear first and last month's rent one more time.

How'd it go? Oh, don't ask.

You know, I don't know why they all need security deposits.

I mean, it's not like we're going to steal an apartment.

Now, look, huh?

Nope. Nope.

You know, we can't even get a closet for what we can afford.

Listen, I know I haven't been very supportive.

I think maybe I was a little bit jealous that you were getting out before me.

That's okay, Mary.

No, it's not.

I know that if the situation had been on the other foot, you guys would have

helped me.

So, uh, if $50 will help, I'll sell back my books from last year.

Aw, thanks, Mary, but no thanks.

Oh, sure, and I could let you have about 20 bucks. I don't need French jeans

that pad.

Aw, Elizabeth.

Oh, really, it's a small price to pay for my own room.

Yeah, I could scrounge around and come up with a few bucks, and Nicholas could

sell his worm farm to Irving J. Moore.

Those guys are really being sweet. Yeah, we can't accept really, but thanks

anyway. Yes.

Well, I don't know about the rest of you guys, but I've got some unpacking to

do. Yeah, me too. Yeah, me three.

Thanks.

Somehow this isn't as much fun anymore.

make this check out to?

What did you say?

Who do I make this check out for?

Abby, you don't mean that you're giving me the money, yeah.

Abby, I mean, this is really generous of you, but don't you think you're going

to be committing domestic suicide?

Oh, I doubt it.

Besides, it's my money. I want you to have it.

Abby, are you sure you want to do this?

Positive.

Abby. Thank you. I don't believe it. Thank you.

You're welcome.

But would you do me a favor?

Anything. Really?

Go talk to your dad and patch things up before you go.

Do you think that's possible, Abby?

Yeah.

I'm not saying it's going to be easy.

Look, the real problem is that he's having trouble letting you go because he

loves you so much.

I don't think he loves you so much at the moment.

You'd be so surprised Take

a deep breath.

Let's go Dad we talked to you for a

second. Oh, yeah, sure. I always have time for my girls, right?

Well, Dad, we just wanted to say that we really... No, no, you don't have to.

I'm to blame as much as you are.

Dad, we really didn't mean for this to turn out to be such a mess.

No, but if I hadn't been so strict and overprotective, a lot of this wouldn't

have even happened.

In fact, I'm writing a whole new set of rules.

I think you'll find them quite liberal. Take curfews. I've practically

eliminated them for you older girls. Well, Dad, that's really open -minded of

you, but... Well, I think I should be a little more reasonable. After all,

you're not children anymore. I can't make all your decisions for you, right?

Then you understand why we have to leave? I understand.

Leave? Yeah, Dad, that's what we came to talk to you about.

We wanted to tell you the reasons why we're moving out.

What do you mean, moving out?

I thought, where did you get the money?

It is my money, you know. I can't do what I want to with it. No, no, not when

comes to my children.

Oh. Well, when was I fired as their stepmother?

You know, I don't understand this. First it was David, now it's you. I'm stabbed

in the back more times than Caesar. What is going on? You know how opposed I was

to them moving out. I thought it was the right thing to do. Oh, you did, did

you? When you know how hard I struggled to keep this family together?

Well, you've done just the opposite.

You call it stabbing in the back?

Well, the truth is, David lends them the last dollar he has so the girls can

move out. And then when he needs the money for his car, they don't hesitate

give it back. And while you're waiting for the whole thing to blow over,

everyone in this family is willing to sacrifice what little they have so that

the girls can move. What are you saying, that I'm a monster because I don't want

my family to dissolve?

No, I'm just trying to remind you that helping and caring for each other is

this family is all about. And in your efforts to keep things together, you

to have forgotten that.

Look, Tom, everyone needs a little help from crawling to walking.

You know, you don't just hop out of the crib. You need somebody there to prop

you up and to support you so that you can learn to walk straight and tall.

Look, until you accept this move and give your blessings, this entire family

will remain divided, even if we all do stay under one roof.

Could you hurry it up?

Hey, Susan, give me a break. Do you realize how much it would cost you to

professional movers haul all this junk?

I'm sorry. It's just I'm anxious to get out of here. It's cold as an iceberg in

the house.

Come on, Joanie.

It's no use.

I know, but come on.

Hey, David.

Well, I guess this is it.

Yep, end of an era.

I was wrong.

What do you say, guys? Is it straight?

Yeah, it's straight.

Not bad of you guys.

I mean, look.

We are three independent women with an apartment of our own.

Sure.

Yeah.

Okay, what's wrong with you two?

Guilt. What else?

Did you see him just staring out the study window?

I mean, it was just so sad.

I know.

It just made me want to run in there and throw my arms around him and say, I'm

sorry, Dad.

We're not leaving.

Johnny.

feel about this, too?

Well, we can't spend the rest of our lives at home because Dad wants us to.

Are you guys expecting somebody?

No, not me.

Must be the landlady. How can it be? We already paid her for some last -minute

food. Dad!

Oh, hi.

Well, with moving and everything, I thought maybe you forgot to eat.

Oh, Daddy.

Look, this is difficult for me, so try to bear with me.

I want to apologize.

Oh, Daddy, please don't say it. We're just glad you're here.

Then you understand why it's so hard for me to let you go.

Oh, Daddy, it was hard for us, too, really.

It... I mean, just because we moved out, it doesn't mean that we don't need you

anymore.

I know.

It took me a while to figure that out.

Well, you going to show me around this palace of yours?

Oh, sure.

I'll give you the deluxe room. Hey, you may not look like much now, Dad. Yeah,

Dad, but once we give it the old Bradford touch. Oh, yeah. Make it nice

messy? No!

Very neat.

Why stop now?

Daddy!

Welcome to the establishment.

Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later.

Janet, how'd you get him to do it?

Oh, I just told him I wouldn't see him anymore unless he got rid of that

Turkey? That's my van you're talking about. My van, unless you pay it off.

You'd repossess the van?

Yeah. Don't worry, Connie, I wouldn't let... Look, Nicholas!

my bike until you pay it off. Oh, come on. Give the kid a break.

I fixed the pedal so you can reach him.

Oh, boy. No training wheels.

Right.

Thanks, David. It's great. Can I pay it off on time?

Ask Tommy. I've got a great credit line.

No, no. No charge this time. It's on the house. Once you pop on, give it a try.

I bet you'll love it.

Stranger. The lone hormone.