Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

[ Joy to the Worldinstrumental]

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

So be sure to get those briefs to Judge Deetz by noon.

Right.

Let's see if we can meet the park manager at 10,

but don't put him out. 11 a.m. would work too.

Confirm my 10 a.m. with Jack Knox. I got a 10:30

- phone call I will not move. - Annie, relax. Breathe.

We are putting on a Christmas concert in four days,

not a royal coronation. I'll see you tomorrow.

Ooh!

Now check out this tree. This is a spectacular example

of a quintessential Faber holiday decoration.

Honey...

Keep trying. Don't get me wrong.

I want to find a tree that makes you happy.

- What? - Where you been all my life?

Well...

14 short months ago I met this handsome young lawyer

from Manhattan, fell madly in love...

even though his idea of "roughing it"

was staying in a hotel with a fulltime masseuse...

[laughing]

...then married the guy

and lived happily ever after.

Oh, my! This is it! This is the tree that we want!

You're making such a big deal out of this.

May I remind you this is our first Christmas

as a married couple and we're having family coming to visit?

Sweetie, this tree is almost $200.

That's way more than we were talking about spending.

You're right.

We had a holiday budget and we should stick to it.

It is a really beautiful tree, though.

Well, we could make this one work.

50 bucks.

Not so fast. What if we shifted some things around

to make this tree fit our budget? I mean,

we're just moving numbers. We add a little here,

we subtract a little there. The overall plan doesn't change.

You're right. It doesn't throw off our master plan.

- It's just a tree. - So you agree?

I do. I do. I do! I do, I do, I do, I do, I do!

[both giggling]

Mind if I ask you a question?

Fire away.

Why didn't you have a Christmas tree growing up?

Well, we did.

It just wasn't inside.

My mom hated the idea of buying them

and throwing them away, so she planted one

in the backyard a week after I was born.

Me and my sister would decorate it every Christmas.

So why put in so much energy picking out this tree?

Well, you always talked about

having these magnificent trees growing up inside your home.

It was something your dad did before he passed away.

It was important to you. It was important to your family.

It was important to my mom.

Look, your mom barely knows me.

Is it wrong that I want her to like

the woman who stole away her baby?

Like the way your dad cares for me?

My dad doesn't have any issues with you.

At our wedding, your dad told my brother that lawyers

are responsible for all the world's problems.

Not all of them. Just most of them.

Love you!

[engine rumbling]

♪ ♪

- Oh! - You got it?

- Yeah. - OK. Just put it in that corner

- right over there. - Yep, right here.

- Get it all set up. - OK...

- Ready? - Uh-huh. Alright.

- Here we go! - OK!

[grunting]

[sighing] Of course.

OK, so next Christmas, I suggest we add

measuring the ceiling and bringing

a tape measure to our tree-purchasing plan.

Maybe the store's still open. We could try to find

- a tree that fits? - I got a better idea.

OK.

OK. OK... [groaning]

I don't remember you mentioning you minored in lumberjack.

Well, I was afraid you'd fall in love with me

for my outdoor talents instead of my charming personality.

[sighing] Woo!

OK...

Perfect.

- Excellent work. - Oh, I'm not even close

to finished. Grab your jacket and meet me outside.

This should do until we can plant a permanent one.

OK. You took care of the bottom part of the tree for my mom.

And you made sure the top part was for mine.

I wish she was alive to see this.

I'm sure she's with us in spirit.

Now it truly is a perfect Christmas.

- We've still got work to do. - You grab the ornaments,

I will meet you inside. Woo!

So, hard as it is to believe, I found both boxes.

I say we get down to some serious...

...decorating.

The concert is three days away

and we're in really great shape.

They're all pretty much amazing.

So which one should we go with?

Let me guess: you want the sleigh

and you want Santa's workshop? So how about this?

What if we compromise and we put the sleigh

beside Santa's workshop so we can have both?

- Does that work? - Brilliant.

Were you up all night working on this stuff?

No, no. In fact,

I went to sleep around 8 last night.

I just want to thank you so much, 'cause I couldn't have done any of this without you.

Consider us your Christmas elves, ready to take on any job

- you don't have time for. - OK, so...

Tell me, when does the family get in?

Steven's brother and crew

arrive tomorrow along with my dad.

What about your sister?

Robin has fallen head over heels for a fellow philosophy major

and they are heading to see his family for the holiday.

So that's everyone.

- Oh... yes. - Well, almost everyone.

You forgot to mention Steve's mother, but you know,

- just a small... - Mm, yeah. It's a mental block.

- I can't help it. - I totally get it, girl.

If you ever want to have a girls' night and just really

get into the whole mother-in-law stuff, I would be down for that,

because I have stories... [indistinct muttering]

Final issue.

- What do we need for the choir? - They're good to go.

With the sound system in place, there won't be a bad seat

in the park.

Hey, are you OK?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.

You don't look so good.

Yeah, no.

What?

You guys didn't have to wait for me.

Are you kidding? We weren't gonna go anywhere until we knew

- that you were OK. - I'm fine.

It's probably just something I ate that didn't agree with me.

Well, why don't you take the day off and go rest?

Because I'm fine.

Um, let's... let's talk later, OK?

OK.

So even after I offered Mr. Bandoni

a fair cash settlement, he refused to close his restaurant.

I'm not sure why you expected anything different.

His restaurant's been at that location for 15 straight years.

Doesn't give him the right to stay until the end of time.

No, but the current owner has guaranteed him a long-term

lease, allowing him to stay there for nine more years.

Look. I can't buy the building and move forward with my plan

until Mr. Bandoni and his restaurant are removed.

And I retained this firm to help with these issues.

I have studied that agreement more times than I care to count

and unfortunately, Mr. Bandoni can legally stay in there.

There's no rule of law that can allow you to challenge that.

What if a situation arose where he could no longer afford his rent?

Restaurant's packed six nights a week. He has the cash flow. I don't see that happening.

- But what if we brought a legal action against him? - For what?

I don't care! Use your Ivy League law school education

that I'm paying for and sue him for something

incredibly expensive to defend.

We'll drive up his legal fees to the point he goes broke...

He's forced to shut his doors.

- Your lab results are back. - Please don't tell me

I have the flu three days before Christmas.

OK, first I need you to take a very deep breath.

OK, yeah, I don't have time for that,

because Steve and I have family coming to visit

and if I get sick, then everyone will get sick and then I ruin Christmas.

Cynthia, you don't have the flu.

- Well, great! - You're pregnant.

[laughing]: What?

- Why is that funny? - Yeah, no, no, no.

That's not possible. I can't be.

Well, have you noticed that you're more tired than usual?

- A little? - Maybe you'd enjoy

- a pickle while we discuss that. - Yes, I would love a pickle,

because I am starving and I'm hungry,

not because I am pregnant. I have barely eaten

all day today. And I'm tired because I've just

started up a business and I'm putting on

the town's Christmas concert.

- It's a big, huge ordeal. - Well,

you can add having a baby to your very long to-do list.

Give me a minute while I set up the sonogram?

- Great, yeah. - OK.

♪ ♪

[quietly]: I'm gonna be a mom.

Let's talk timetable. Can you serve him

with papers by 6 p.m.? [cell buzzing]

It's three days before Christmas, Jack.

Look.

In the spirit of full disclosure,

I have to tell you that I know and like Arturo Bandoni.

We eat at his restaurant once a week.

So you're refusing to move forward based on a personal relationship?

No, I'm telling you that I will not take your lawsuit

because what you're asking me to do is immoral

and you will not win.

I'm sorry you feel that way.

Look. Why don't you take a few days,

check out some other available buildings around town

and we'll come back to this situation after the holidays

and we'll discuss it again?

[distant phone ringing]

Hey.

Here is a video of your ultrasound.

It makes pretty great viewing when you're tired of reruns.

Ha ha. You're positive that I'm pregnant?

I can guarantee you with 100% certainty

that the healthy baby on this DVD belongs to you.

You want to call your husband with the good news?

Yes. No, no, I just tried calling him,

but he didn't pick up. But I think

I want to do this in person anyway.

That's probably the best Christmas present

- you could ever give him. - Ha!

So when Mr. Knox insisted I move forward with his lawsuit,

I told him I couldn't in good conscience.

That showed a lot of guts, Steve. Jack Knox is this firm's

biggest client. But at Bedouin, Ross, McAlister and Associates,

we pay for the salaries and the lights

and the office parties by suing individuals.

Well, sure, but you're not saying that we should threaten

a restaurant owner, who also happens to be a good man,

with frivolous litigation just to run him out of business.

- No. - That's a relief. - I'm saying I'm letting you go.

Well...

You're firing me three days before Christmas?

No, I'm providing you

with an opportunity to expand your horizons

before we enter the new year.

Yeah, just wait a minute, because my wife and I,

we have this plan. You see,

we marry, we relocate, I take this job,

Cynthia starts her own event-planning business,

we buy a small house, our businesses grow... Look, I'm...

Can you wait? 'Cause there's more. See, five years

after that, Cynthia gets pregnant and two years later,

Cynthia has another baby. And that all leads up

to the 10-year mark, where I become full partner

at this firm. Am I making myself clear?

I understand how a sudden parting of the ways

can come as such a complete shock.

I've been in the law business for 30 years. Two ex-wives.

And I'm going to leave you with this valuable piece of wisdom.

And what's that?

Plans change.

So Steve,

before I say anything, I just need you to breathe.

Now the important thing is we don't panic.

- I am not panicking. - It was the right thing to do.

- We can make this work. - We can make this work.

It's just one new little addition.

The good news is we still have health insurance.

The bad news is I lost my job

'cause I just got fired.

You and I are going to have a baby.

Yeah. I think this is going to go over very, very well.

I think this is going to go over very, very well.

♪ ♪

Good evening, Mr. Faber.

Wow.

What did I do so right? Why are we celebrating?

Why not?

What about you?

Don't worry about me.

Hey, you put the lights up on the tree.

- It looks beautiful. - Come here.

I want to show you something.

- Here. Sit down. - What's going on?

Just come sit! Let's watch some TV.

You're acting strange, even for you. Oh, is this 'cause

- my mom's coming to town tonight? - No, but I did run to that

gourmet market and picked up some of that honey black tea

- that your mom likes. - You didn't have to do that.

Well, I just wanted to make her feel at home as much as possible.

- And you're wonderful. - Yeah, but if she doesn't

- think so then we got problems. - You, my dear wife,

seriously underestimate your charm.

Or you overestimate it.

Now let's watch some TV.

Actually, we don't have any time to watch TV right now.

Well, sure we do. Your mom doesn't arrive until 8.

No, she took an earlier flight. She gets in at 7.

- Why didn't you tell me? - I forgot, but if we leave

- now we'll get there easily. - It takes 30 minutes to get there. We should have left

- 10 minutes ago! - Hey! Take your own advice.

- Breathe. - If we get caught in traffic

then we'll be late and then she's going to blame me and then

she's going to hate me. I'm acting like a crazy person, aren't I?

But I want you to know you are truly the best crazy person I've ever met.

I love you. Grab your stuff.

Let's go!

[Joy to the Worldinstrumental]

[cars honking]

What if she changed her mind and decided not to come?

Mom will be here.

Why didn't you insist on me wearing that ring?

What?

Your grandmother's engagement ring. She offered it to me

and I said no because it was too big, it was too expensive

and I was afraid I was going to lose it. I lose everything!

I swear, I feel like she holds that against me.

No, no. That's not my mom's issue.

Oh. So you are saying she does have a problem with me.

No, I'm saying it's all in your head.

My mom's plane just landed.

You have to keep moving.

There she is!

OK, let's go. Let's go.

There she is. Hi! We're going.

Thank you.

- Oh, my baby boy. - Hey, Mom.

- Hello, Patricia. - Cynthia.

- How was your flight? - Ugh!

The woman sitting next to me never stopped talking.

You'd think you pay that much for first class,

they'd provide you with a mute button.

Um, you know what? Let me grab this.

Oh, thank you. The driver usually gets it.

No, it's OK. For tonight, I'll fill that role.

[honking] Mom! You gotta be careful.

I'm fine, Steven. We're Manhattanites, remember?

Are you OK?

Oh, didn't even get close. Although I should have gotten

- his license plate. - Hey, let's go!

OK, let's get going before we all get arrested.

Well, let him try. He'd be up against

the brightest young attorney this town has ever seen.

Oh, did you want to sit up front?

No. No, I was just getting this for you.

Oh! Thank you.

I'll grab that.

We're so excited that you're here.

Oh, Steven, you wouldn't believe

what the planning committee wants to do at my co-op.

I'm sure I won't.

[dramatic music]

Are you sure I'm not putting you out, taking your room and all?

- I'd be happy to stay at a hotel. - That's out of the question.

- Our house is your house. - What else can we get you?

Well, you can bring me my other things.

Everything's here. I put your garment bag and purse there.

Well, what about my large suitcase?

- There was no large suitcase. - Of course there was a large suitcase.

Everything you arrived with is in this room.

Well, if that were the case, then I'd be wearing

that lovely cashmere sweater that I packed

inside the suitcase and purchased solely for this trip.

Is it possible you left it in baggage claim?

Absolutely not. I clearly remember

rolling it out of the terminal and right up to the curb.

- Your suitcase had wheels? - Yes. It's very expensive,

- with all my favourite things. - And I offered to put it in the trunk.

Love that bag. I've travelled all over the world with it.

And then you nearly got hit by a taxi and I came running up

- to see if you were OK. - Yes, and thankfully I was.

And then the police officer was giving us such a hard time

and we were so rushed and there was all this commotion

and then when we jumped into the car...

Uh, oh.

Are you telling us you forgot to put Mom's luggage in the trunk?

I think that's exactly what she's telling us.

What do you think is taking so long?

It's Christmas. The airline must be super busy.

My best things were in that bag.

Well, don't worry. I bet you

Steve's making arrangements for your bag as we speak.

Along with all of my grandchildren's gifts.

I'm happy to replace whatever is lost.

I knitted everyone a different, special sweater

from a pattern given to me by my knitting society.

Each one took almost a month.

Must be really long sleeves. But none of that matters.

I am positive that your bag is on its way.

I just spoke with the head of airline baggage claim.

- Your suitcase hasn't been turned in. - Yet.

- It hasn't been turned in yet! - And although he doesn't hold

much hope, he said you should try calling back tomorrow.

Not a lot of hope is a lot better than no hope, right?

I mean, let's stay confident. After all, it's Christmas

and we're all together.

You're right.

It's Christmas and we are all together.

Are you totally quiet in there because you're mad at me?

No! Leaving my mom's luggage at the airport like that

- could have happened to anybody. - Except it didn't happen to anybody.

It happened to me. If she didn't hate me before,

- I bet she does now. - She doesn't hate you.

She probably wishes I got run over by that taxi.

- What are you working on? - Some end of the year tax planning.

- You sure everything's OK? - Positive.

Hey. I have an idea. What if we go downstairs

and we watch that movie that I was telling you about?

Oh, no thanks. I'm beat.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Come on.

- I hear it's, like, really good. - Oh, I'm gonna call it a night.

♪ ♪

- Morning, babe. - Why didn't you wake me?

- I would have helped. - You kidding me? I got it.

- How long you been up? - I'm not sure I slept.

Did you not feel that stabbing spring

- popping through the mattress? - No. I did wake up in a panic,

though. I dreamt that I left your mom's suitcase

- at the airport. - That actually happened.

Ha ha. Dang. I was hoping that was a nightmare.

Oh, it is. It's just a nightmare we're all experiencing wide awake.

Merry two days before Christmas, everyone.

Merry two days before Christmas to you too, Mom.

- Did you locate my luggage? - I made a call.

- The news was all bad. - I just want you

to know I am very, very sorry.

Well, I just want you to know

that I don't blame you for leaving my suitcase

and all the Christmas presents at the airport.

I mean, you didn't mess up on purpose.

It wasn't a subliminal message to your new mother-in-law.

I am positive... Mother! Eat.

[phone buzzing]

How much do you want to bet that is an airline

representative with great news? It's my brother.

Or not.

Hey, Owen. I'm so glad you're finally in town.

Me too, bro. In fact, I'm at the hotel right now.

Oh, and I do not want you to thank me for the room upgrade.

Oh, I won't, because we've encountered

a teensy, weensy little problem.

[The hotel doesn't have a room for us. No reservation at all.]

Oh, OK. Just calm down. I'm telling you,

- there's been a mistake. - No, no mistake. - Are you sure?

I'm sure.

I can fix this.

Just... I'll be there as soon as I can.

I promise you there's a reservation.

Can you maybe check under Farber instead of Faber?

[indistinct conversation]

Hey, guys. Easy, easy! Slow.

Owen said that you're going to be in charge of the local Christmas concert this year.

- I am. - That seems like a lot

with your family here too.

- Oh, you guys are so easy. - I meant Patricia.

Yeah, how long did it take

for you to get comfortable around her?

Oh, I'm not comfortable. Who says I'm comfortable?

She's not easy, but she will grow on you.

Great. I hope I grow on her too,

just not like a wart. [chuckling]

How do you think those guys are doing over there?

I don't know,

- but let me check. - Good call.

Here. Let's just try it this way, OK?

OK? Here. Listen. Look.

What is this?

You're showing me an online reservation confirmation.

Exactly. Three weeks ago I booked a room for my mother

and for my brother, so how can you not have a room?

Well, this reservation runs from today, which is two days

before Christmas, until the day after Christmas.

Look. On here it shows that you booked two rooms,

but the reservation for both rooms was cancelled last week.

- By whom? I didn't do it. - Says right here

the reservation was cancelled by Cynthia "Fabber"?

Fab... Faber?

- But that's impossible. - You didn't make the call?

No, I did, but I didn't mean to cancel both.

I only meant to cancel one room for my mother-in-law.

The reservation for both rooms was booked together.

- But I didn't know that. - That's unfortunate.

There must be an extra room for emergencies.

I mean, this thing happens all the time, right?

Uh, I've been here six years. It's never happened once.

- We can't sleep in the car. - Well, that's not a problem.

- We can all squeeze in the house. - If it makes you feel any better,

I've had at least a dozen calls from desperate travellers

in the same position.

- That really doesn't help us. - What does "Have a Merry Christmas" do?

[crashing]

Oops.

Not a lot.

♪ ♪

I'm so stupid!

How did I cancel the reservation?

Don't worry about it. It's not like you did it on purpose.

- Dad? - Hey!

Princess! Hi. [laughing]

- Hi! What are you doing here? - Waiting for you!

I can see that. I'm just surprised to see you here.

Not half as surprised as I was to recognize this car

- on my walk through town. - What happened to Ellie?

She gave up a couple miles back.

- Refused to go any further. - You left a woman

- behind on the highway? - Why didn't you call me?

I did. I tried to call you. You didn't pick up.

- Hey, Steve-o, how you doing? - Great, Jerry. Just great.

- Did you hear from your sister? - Last night. She was packing

- for her Christmas trip. - I like that boyfriend

of hers... Joe! Steve, Joe's a poet. He writes poetry.

Oh, yeah, you have mentioned that

in one or two of our conversations.

Yeah, he's quite a talent. He can describe a situation

in prose that is so uplifting,

I tell you, it just about makes me break down and weep.

You know, I am just glad you're so proud of him.

Yeah. Hey, here's another thing.

I was reading that there's something like 56 000 lawyers

on planet Earth for every one published poet.

Huh. Well, I did not know that,

but thank you for that fact.

That didn't really rhyme, right? You know that?

Uh, what are we going to do with Ellie?

Ah! Well, there she goes now.

Oh.

Ellie's a camper.

- Should have figured that. - Yeah, I figure

the carburetor's on the fritz, or something.

Well, I guess you could say that puts a damper on your camper.

- Huh? - I guess you could.

♪ ♪

How's things going with Mom and Cynthia?

- How do you think? - I think I have a pretty

good idea. She called from here while we were

- on our way to the hotel. - Yeah? She happen to mention

the luggage incident in that conversation?

Oh, yeah. Lynn laughed so hard at one point I thought

- we'd have to pull over. - Why is that?

It's the first time in 12 years she's had another daughter-in-law to torment.

Cynthia and I did get married for your wife's wellbeing.

You know, if Lynn were standing here right now,

- she would definitely thank you. - How's everything else?

I'm surviving.

Do you know how many times a kid has to stop

and go to the bathroom on a three-hour car ride?

- I'm guessing more than one. - I've really begun to envy you,

with your peaceful weekends and quiet nights.

I truly do miss time by myself.

- Do you still run? - Ran four miles this morning.

Huh. I still run. I run up and down the stairs,

picking up after two kids. I run to the drugstore at 2 a.m.

to buy cough medicine. And last week, oh, last week,

I got to run back to work after missing a very important client meeting,

'cause Brian forgot his school project at home.

- Well, you love your kids. - To the moon and back again.

But there are some days, you know?

Yeah, I know.

You know, you're only staying for three nights.

Kids.

[indistinct conversation]

You kids enjoying your holiday?

- Yeah. - Kind of.

You'll learn one day that kids don't actually like to play anymore.

- Is that so? - Yep. All they need

can be held in the palm of their hands.

- We're talking to our friends. - Yeah. It's fun to see what they're all doing.

What they're all doing? What about what you're doing?

We're not doing anything worth mentioning.

Either of you guys ever go down a mountain

so fast that your parents totally freaked out?

- No. - No...

Well, I think it's time Uncle Steve took you two

on a little Christmas adventure.

One, two, three!

[various]: Go! ♪ ♪

[cheering]

[man]: Alright!

Woo!

Go, go, yeah!

[laughing] Come on!

I love it. I love it. Love it.

Come on! You got this!

[screaming] Oh, my God!

- Here, this is a good one. - Oh, fabulous.

- You're not a sledder? - Yeah, I am.

My stomach's just a bit rolly right now.

- Aw. - Steve and I really appreciate

you traveling all this way to be here.

And there they are again! Yeah!

♪ ♪

How come you're not sledding?

I was hanging with your Mom.

I feel like we had a real breakthrough.

- Or you're having a breakdown. - Go ahead and laugh.

No, I think we really turned a corner.

Hmm. Congratulations. That's really big stuff.

- Right? - Hey, Stevie!

- OK, that's such a cheap shot! - Oh, my God! Snowball fight! - Get him! Get him, guys!

- Revenge shot! - Whoa!

Sweetie, it's on.

[Cynthia grunting]

OK, wait, wait! I didn't say start!

[chuckling]

There's no good snow back here! I can't make a snowball!

- It's all ice. I got nothing! - Ha ha ha ha.

Oh, no, sweetie. Sweetie, baby, honey.

- No, you wouldn't. - Aw. Would you?

Yeah, but you're nicer than me.

You sure about that?

Not anymore!

Are you OK?

Oh, no.

Whoa, Grandma, are you OK?

Aunt Cynthia plugged you right in the eye.

Breakthrough, huh?

OK. Everyone is unpacking.

I put Owen and the crew in our room.

- Mom's in the guest room. - If you couldn't sleep

on that mattress, how will she?

I have no idea, but I figured the pointy springs

would distract her from the snowball to the face.

Ha. Yeah, you're a prince.

What about your dad?

Well, he wanted to sleep in the camper.

So where do we crash?

We crash in the den.

[groaning] My poor back.

Well, if you play your cards right,

I might even throw in a massage.

Listen. I owe you an apology.

I haven't been my best these last few days.

Well...

we both have been a bit preoccupied.

What I wanted to... So it's like this...

Sorry to interrupt. We forgot the kids' allergy medicine.

Give me a ride to the drugstore? I'm kind of in the middle of something here, bud.

Yeah. An allergy meltdown.

Sure. I'll drive.

Great. I'll grab my coat.

You see that guy?

- He never gets a break. - Owen seems really happy.

You should hear the way he talks about parenthood.

I mean, they never get a moment to themselves.

I would never say that we're perfect, but we definitely

made the right decision on holding off on having a family.

You better get going.

I won't be long and we'll talk when I get back.

Uh, I won't be here when you're back.

I scheduled a quick meeting with Annie and Richard.

We got a few last-minute concert items that need to be finalized.

Oh, I'm sorry. With all that's been going on,

I forgot to ask you how your show's been going.

Oh, so far, so good,

but we'll talk when you're back.

[sighing]

♪ ♪

So I want the PA speakers on the right

and left sides of the stage

- and I want two in the back. - I can handle that.

Great. [Richard sighing]

You don't look happy. This is Christmas. You should be happy.

Our mistletoe was accidentally shipped to Kansas City.

Oh. So Missouri's now the kissing capital of the country.

What could be worse than a Christmas without mistletoe?

Ooh! Halloween with no candy.

No, you're right, Richard. This is very serious.

This is not a problem. We know where it is.

We can have it shipped overnight. Done and done.

Alright. I'm on it.

Are you feeling better?

It's just that yesterday you were sick and then,

- well, you cut our meeting short. - Oh, yeah, I'm fine.

I think it was just something I ate. So, um, what else

- do we need covered? - I mean, nothing, really.

I think we got it all.

Really? 'Cause I feel like we're forgetting something.

You don't want to go home, do you?

- [laughing]: Don't be silly. - It's just that as I look over

the checklist, I'm pretty sure we could have handled all this

- with a real quick phone call. - OK, so maybe...

my house is just getting a wee bit cramped.

Mother-in-law issues, yeah?

I pride myself on being able to throw

a professionally staged event

for the whole town to see without a hitch.

When it comes to handling my own family, yeesh.

Surviving a new mother-in-law is every recent bride's

right of passage. And you, you're going to be fine, I promise.

Thank you. So let's go over the lighting just one more...

Uh-uh. No, no, no, no. You get out of here!

- Go. - You know, one more thing.

Um, where are we with Mr. and Mrs. Claus?

Yeah. Well, Frank and Wendy Delaney have played this role

for the past 10 years. They will arrive one hour before showtime

so they will have plenty of time to get into costume

and rehearse their "ho, ho, ho's."

Now, you gonna go home or did you want me

to... I don't know, I could call your mother-in-law to come pick you up?

OK, I'm leaving. Love your work.

♪ ♪

[Hark the Herald Angels Sing instrumental]

[indistinct chatter]

[Jerry]: I have found something very special

- for the tree! Oh, ho, ho, ho! - Which one did you get?

Oh, you got such a good one!

That's an oldie, but a goodie.

Oh, that's very unusual.

Oh, my sister Robin made that.

I remember that Christmas, huh? She modeled it

after our dog, Sprocket.

- It's a dog? - In Robin's defense,

there's a reason why she majored in philosophy and not art.

I loved that dog. He used to get into the neighbour's yard

and wreak havoc.

I never cared much for that neighbour.

- Hey. - Oh!

Don't you think Sprocket would be more comfortable over there?

- Nobody can see him over there. - Exactly.

- Mom... - I think Sprocket has just as much right to that spot as

whatever silly thing you're holding in your hand there.

- Dad... - It's the Eiffel Tower and

- we got it on a trip to Paris. - OK, so Mom,

how about you let Jerry have that spot and you can hang

- the tower up higher? - Or Jerry could just learn

to be more polite.

Mom...

[doorbell ringing] You hold down the fort.

I'm gonna go get that. OK?

- Robin? - Hey, sis.

Hi! Come in, come in, come in.

Hey, guys! Look who's here!

[various greetings] What a wonderful surprise!

Merry Christmas! Where's Joe?

[crying]

Um, I'll just be a minute.

I don't know what... I don't know why he would do it.

[crying]

Um, Robin?

I can't help you if I can't understand you.

- OK. - So...

you're at the train station with Joe.

All is well and you're heading to see his parents,

- and then...? - And then as we're boarding

the train, that's when he decides it's time to tell me

that he's switching his major to business.

- What's wrong with that? - We're philosophy majors.

There's nothing wrong with having different interests.

Unless he's changing majors to get away from me!

Then why would Joe invite you

to spend Christmas with his parents?

Could you imagine what Mom would say if I brought home

- a business major? - What are you talking about?

- I married a lawyer. - But lawyers defend

the downtrodden. They protect the rights of individuals.

They start revolutions that overthrow dictators and stuff.

Steve's a litigator with a focus on real estate law.

And some do that too. Look, the point is

you found a way to make peace with it.

What does that even mean?

Steve is a rock.

Your husband tells you everything that's on his mind.

Our relationship didn't start out that way.

And after a year of being together,

we're still working on that.

And that still doesn't explain why you didn't get on the train.

I could really use your support right now!

OK, OK. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Um, continue.

So Joe and I are standing there, face to face,

and I said, "I don't recognize you."

He makes some dumb joke about me needing glasses

and I said, "No, I can see you clearly. I just don't know

if I like what I see." So he says maybe I should

think about our relationship. Next thing I know, his train

is chugging away and I'm standing there alone,

missing him like crazy. At least I think I miss him.

But I'm better off without him, right?

Absolutely. Especially if that's what you really feel.

Yeah, I do. I really, really do.

Do I? No, I do.

Yeah.

What's up?

Robin broke up with her boyfriend.

Joe the poet? Why?

Philosophical differences.

Huh. Under the circumstances, that makes complete sense.

Should I quickly build an extra room to the house,

or do you want me to grab some clean blankets for the air mattress?

Let's do blankets and an air mattress.

- And I'm sorry. - Don't be.

Your sister's always welcome.

This hasn't exactly been the perfect Christmas, has it?

It's been less than traditional.

And I know just how to fix this.

Come with me. Come, come, come on.

[overlapping voices]

Let's separate the men from the boys, right?

- Oh, you got it. You got it. - Stick that wall on there, pal.

My goodness. I am an architect.

- Wow. - So you're building houses out of graham crackers?

- Top to bottom. - And not gingerbread?

Nope. We couldn't afford it growing up,

so this became our family tradition.

Nom, nom, nom. Nom, nom, nom.

If you'd like, I could order up a few

- ready-made gingerbread houses. - Why would we want to do that?

Well, because the ones you buy just look better.

- Aw, I think these look great. - Me too.

Not half as nice as this. Look at this!

[yelling]

[laughing]

Continue to have fun!

[The First Noelinstrumental]

- Jerry?! - Steve. - Dad?

Oh! Honey. Do not sneak up on me like that.

- I was just in the bathroom. - I almost had a heart attack.

Jerry, it's past midnight. What's wrong?

Yeah, look. I'm sorry, guys. I know I said I was going

to sleep in the camper, but my heater's not working.

That's not a problem, Dad. That's not a problem at all.

Thanks, honey.

[loud snoring]

[Silent Nightinstrumental]

♪ ♪

♪ I'm watching snowflakes falling to the ground ♪

♪ Jingle bells, how I love the sound ♪

♪ Of carol singers singing

♪ And all the joy they're bringing to everyone around ♪

- Thank you. - What makes you think

Patricia wants a large, overpriced suitcase?

A shot in the dark. Can you take this out to the car

- so Patricia doesn't see? - Sure.

Thank you!

♪ ♪

- They're so tiny, aren't they? - [laughing]: Hi.

I didn't mean to frighten you.

You don't. Uh, you didn't.

What I meant to say is that babies are so tiny.

Oh, Steven was the perfect little angel.

I remember wrapping him in his first blanket

and sniffing the top of his head

and thinking, life will never get any better than this.

Well, I hope to see those pictures one day.

I used to keep my favourite one of all inside of a locket.

Ah, like this?

Oh! It was fairly similar.

- What happened to it? - Oh, I lost it years ago.

Never could find another one to replace it.

I'm sorry. This belonged to my mom.

Oh, let's see.

Oh, my. There's a child who never missed a meal.

Yep, that's me.

So were you shopping for anyone in particular?

Uh, yes. My friend Jane.

Best friend. She's awesome.

Um, she's having a baby next week.

Next month. Wow.

I wonder, I wonder... It's so late.

- I wonder where Robin went. - Oh, she's right outside.

You are absolutely right. She is right there.

Yep. I'm going to get these tomorrow.

Bye!

What do you like better, getting presents or giving them?

Definitely giving. I never feel

appreciative enough when I get a present,

so I end up just making this goofy face.

I hate to break it to you, bro, but that's actually

your normal face. You're welcome to buy me

- a new set of golf clubs. - Not this Christmas, bud.

How is everything?

I remember the Christmas Lynn and I hosted Mom. Not good.

Yeah, but I think Cynthia's up for the challenge.

- She deals with me, right? - True enough. And work?

- I just got fired. - Hilarious.

No, it's true. I just got fired.

You know what? It doesn't sound so bad when you say it

- out loud. - What are you talking about?

- It sounds awful. - Thanks for the words of encouragement.

No, I didn't mean it the way that it...

Yeah, no, I definitely meant it. What do you mean you got fired?

Our biggest client wanted me to take on

this frivolous lawsuit and I wouldn't do it, so my boss fired me.

Wow. Cynthia's amazing.

Lynn would have killed me. Slowly.

Cynthia doesn't know yet. I haven't told her.

- Well, eventually, you gotta say something. - I know, but it's Christmas.

- I don't want to ruin it for her. - Wow. Yeah, no,

- I don't know what to say. - You're not going to

say anything. You have to promise me you're not going to

say a word until I find a way to tell Cynthia.

Promise.

- I promise. - Alright.

♪ ♪

So it's Christmas Eve and I haven't bought any presents.

- So what did you get Dad? - Two flannel shirts.

That's boring. Can I put my name on the card?

- Really? - Sorry, no.

I'll buy him something, even though I'm a starving

philosophy major with student loans I'll never pay off.

And single, with no hope of ever finding anyone who will love me.

Alright, you win.

You can put your name on the card.

[jingling]

Merry Christmas.

So I have a bit of news that I think you might

- be interested in. - Is it about Joe?

- Did he call? - No, he didn't.

- But he texted you, right? - No.

Oh, no, that's right. Joe loves email.

Did he say he's miserable

having to spend Christmas with his family too?

I meant under the circumstances of our not being together,

- that's all. - No, Joe hasn't contacted me.

That's too bad. I really miss the guy.

So why don't you reach out and tell him that?

- Do you think he'd listen? - Call him.

- What if he doesn't talk? - Let's find out.

No way. No, if he wants to get back together,

then he needs to be the one to call.

- Alright. - Sorry.

Did you want to tell me something?

Jeez, I wonder what he's up to right now.

♪ ♪

[grunting]

[indistinct muttering] [clanging]

[distant banging]

- Can I get you anything? - Earplugs.

And a deck of cards.

[continuous banging]

How's the tree? [Cynthia sighing]

I'm not sure it'll make it through the season.

I'm thinking the same thing about our parents.

I should really get my dad to stop.

No, let him finish. Mom's from Manhattan, remember?

A little noise adds to the ambiance.

Do you need help in the kitchen?

The "Lasagna de la Faber" is baking in the oven.

- There is nothing left to do. - Thank you for making dinner.

How goes the concert?

Ah... um,

that's the one area of my life where everything

is going just as planned.

Um... [small chuckle]

There's some news

that I've been meaning to share with you.

Yeah, there's something that I have to get off my chest too.

There's nothing you can't tell me.

I know, I know, I know. Right hand, left hand, remember?

- You're stalling. - OK, OK.

I was... [phone ringing]

Hang on.

Mr. Bedouin.

- Would you give me just a second? - Sure.

OK. [beep]

Hello?

Yes, sir.

OK, sir. OK!

- What did he want? - Cynth, we may be getting

our first Christmas miracle. I have to go back to the office.

- Now? On Christmas Eve? - I know, I know.

- I'll be back in an hour. - Well, there was

some things that you wanted to tell me

and there's some news I needed to tell you too.

I know, I know, and we will talk about it,

I promise. I have to go. I'll be back in a bit.

[quietly]: OK. Alright.

Love you.

Actually, wait. There is one thing that you can do for me.

Take the lasagna out of the oven in 10 minutes.

- Consider it done. - OK.

- Love you so much. - Love you.

[bird chirping]

[ominous music]

[knocking]

Ah, Steven.

Glad you could make it on such short notice.

- You always work on Christmas Eve? - When I'm surrounded by family,

I like to get out of the house. What about you?

I would think under the circumstances,

- it's been quite stressful. - Things have been a little bit tense.

Well, since we last spoke,

I've given a lot of thought to your family plan.

- That makes two of us. - And because it's the holiday

and I'm feeling a little more generous than I normally do,

I've decided to help you put that plan in place.

So you're unfiring me?

- I am. - Wow.

That's... that's fantastic.

I... I don't even know how to thank you.

Well, I do. You'll be moving forward

with the Bandoni lawsuit. You succeed for Knox on this one

and you can call yourself a junior partner.

Even though we both know it'll destroy a man's life?

This isn't between you and Mr. Bandoni.

That lawsuit is in the best interest of our client,

- Mr. Knox. - I understand that.

So let's cut to the chase. Do you want your job back or not?

Of course I do. It's just that I...

- I have to think about it. - Take a few days.

Consider your future and your family's future.

I think your decision will be a lot clearer then.

[birds chirping]

♪ ♪ Apologies in advance.

- Dinner might be overcooked. - You really want me to eat this?

[throat clearing] It looks delicious. Right?

Steve told me to take it out of the oven, but I forgot.

- It's really spicy. - I may have added

a little too much red pepper to repair things.

I am so, so sorry.

So how about we start a new tradition

and all go out to eat? What do you say?

[all assenting]

Where are we going to get a table at 6 p.m. on Christmas Eve?

I have a great idea and it happens

to be Steve's favourite place: Bandoni's!

Oh, no, I don't think they're open.

- Of course they are. - Wonderful. Let's do it!

[overlapping voices] Let's get our coats, guys.

Mm. This penne is fantastic.

It's delicious, right?

- Hey, you OK? - Yeah, absolutely.

Merry Christmas to all of you.

- [various]: Merry Christmas! - Merry Christmas, Arturo!

- So how's everybody's meal? - So good.

If you need anything else, you let me know. How are you, Steve?

I'm fantastic, thanks for asking.

And thanks for squeezing us all in so late.

Are you kidding? You're family. You'll always have a table here.

- OK, enjoy your meal. - [various]: Thank you!

- Hey, to Mr. Bandoni! - [various]: To Mr. Bandoni!

Cheers! [indistinct chatter]

- Merry Christmas! - Cheers!

[O Tannenbauminstrumental]

So any word from the business major?

- Who might you be referring to? - Joe, your boyfriend.

Ex-boyfriend.

You know, I never told you this,

but before I opened up the fishing shop,

I was a business major.

- Mom was OK with that? - She married me, didn't she?

So who's up for roasting chestnuts?

We are stringing popcorn ropes.

Oh, fascinating. You can do this yourself?

Mm-hmm, yes, we can, 'cause all the little elves

down in Toyland were already busy.

- Why don't you join us? - If you're not afraid to get your hands dirty.

Move over.

Let a pro show you how it's done.

Oh, please. You might break a nail. Go ahead.

I can take you any day of the week.

Oh, you don't have a chance.

Oh, yeah? On your mark,

get set, go!

Come on, girls, come on, girls, come on, girls!

- Come on, kids! - Here you go.

[Jingle Bellsinstrumental]

[cackling] Alright, come on, Dad.

- Let's go. - Here we go, here we go.

[kids]: Grandma! Grandma! Grandma!

You watching her? How's she doing?

- Alright, Dad, come on. You got it. You got it. Come on. - Grandma! Grandma! Grandma!

Grandma! Grandma! Grandma!

Well, here's mine.

Oh.

Looks like you got out-strung, Dad.

- Crushed. - It's beginner's luck, come on.

I just happen to be the fastest needle

in my knitting group. You never stood a chance.

- Nice one, Grandma. - This is amazing. - Thanks.

- You tried, Dad. - The fire is roarin'.

Oh, you guys made popcorn!

Come join us by the fireplace.

Your boys have never strung popcorn, have they?

Mm-mm. [Joy to the World instrumental]

- Let me finish that. - No, I'm good, thanks.

- You must be exhausted. - I'm fine.

Move over anyway.

Can I ask you a question?

Certainly.

Well...

what I wanted to know was...

well...

- Just ask. - OK.

I feel like we got off on the wrong foot.

Well, since I've arrived, all you've done is lose my luggage,

mistakenly cancel my son's hotel reservation

and hit me in the head with a packed snowball.

Well, if you want to focus on the negative, that's one way

- to see our relationship. - Cynthia.

I have no issue with you.

Yeah, but now you're just saying that because it's what

- I want to hear. - No, I'm saying it because I mean it.

Now, just relax and stop trying so hard.

We're going to be on this adventure for a very long time.

Well, that's my plan too.

And I want the two of you back into your own bedroom tonight.

But what about Owen and Lynn?

Oh, I'll take care of family logistics.

And congratulations on the pregnancy.

How did you know that I was having a baby?

I just found out the day before yesterday.

Well, I saw the twinkle in your eyes

when you were looking at baby clothes.

I'm just surprised Steven has kept the secret.

Yeah. I haven't told him yet.

Why haven't you told him?

- Because of our plan. - What plan?

Steve and I came up with this life plan

before we got married.

We wanted to chart a clear course for the future.

But baby Faber

wasn't supposed to arrive until four years later.

His father and I did the very same thing.

- Did you stick to it? - We lasted about three months

and then we realized the universe had a plan of its own.

I'm afraid to tell Steve, 'cause he'll be disappointed.

Oh, he will love this baby.

However, I suggest you mention it before you go into labour.

Yeah, that's a good point.

I will; I promise.

♪ ♪

So this baby thing is pretty big news, huh?

It's been so crazy at home, I haven't even had a chance

to tell my husband.

Does that make me a bad wife?

I wish you were here to guide me.

Are you crazy? You're going to catch pneumonia

out here without a coat. Come on, get her warmed up.

- Put this on, here. - Thank you.

So you... you talking to anybody we know?

I miss her.

- Oh, honey. - Me too.

Me three.

Hey! I brought this from the house.

I remember the Christmas Mom made that.

- It's so pretty. - Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

♪ ♪

♪ There's some lights on the porch ♪

♪ The kids are off to bed

♪ A crazy red hat

♪ On top of your head

♪ The stockings we made

♪ A year at a time

♪ Hung by a fire

♪ Like clothes on a line

♪ I don't know much about snowmen ♪

♪ But they do alright here

♪ Where it's Christmas

♪ Every day of the year ♪

[Joy to the Worldinstrumental] [birds chirping]

[snoring]

- It's Christmas Day! - We wanna open presents!

- Guys, what time is it? - Guys!

- 7. - Go back to sleep.

Come on, Dad. Get up! I want to see what Santa brought!

- Chill. - Wake up.

- No, guys, we need more sleep. - Well, for how long?

- Like, at least an hour. - Are you crazy? It's Christmas.

Yeah, lady, are you crazy?

OK, OK. 15 minutes, OK?

What are we supposed to do while we wait?

Mm, just watch TV. But keep the volume down.

My guess is everyone's still sleeping.

- What is that? - Mom?

- Mom? - Dad! What is...

- Wow. - Whoa.

- Wow! - Wow.

[various]: Aw!

I can't believe my brother didn't tell me.

- Yeah, Steve doesn't know. - I thought my sister and I were closer than that.

- Cynthia hasn't told anyone. - Why not?

She was waiting for the right time, but something

- kept getting in the way. - Wait. Cynthia told you?

Well, I figured it out for myself.

We're finally going to have a cousin!

- I'm going to teach him... - Or her.

...how to get in so much trouble.

[laughing]

I am going to have a grandchild

I can take to a ballgame!

- Or a Broadway play. - Alright.

Um... not sure I should say anything, but there's more.

Cynthia's having twins?

Steve lost his job.

My sister doesn't tell me anything!

Steve hasn't even told Cynthia yet.

Let me guess: he didn't want to ruin her Christmas.

That's right. And he feels awful.

- Honestly, I'm thinking I should maybe say something. - Not if you still

- want to be included in my will. - My lips are sealed.

- Merry Christmas, everyone. - [various]: Oh, hey!

Merry Christmas. [throats clearing]

- What's the matter? - Oh, nothing.

- Good, yeah. Great, great. - Christmas! Christmas!

[indistinct muttering]

OK, Brian and Elizabeth...

[throat clearing]

Did... did I do something wrong?

It's a Faber family tradition to open one present at a time.

Oh. We're going to be here till New Years.

You know what? Let's keep the family tradition

and Patricia...

- Patricia, I have for you. - Oh!

Wonder what that could be.

[doorbell ringing] Wait. Who's not already here?

I'll get that. You guys just continue opening presents.

- Do you think I should open it? - She said not to wait.

OK...

Ooh, don't open it!

[gasping] Look what Santa delivered!

My suitcase! They found it!

Dad, I switched.

This was supposed to be, actually, for you.

I don't know why I wrote "Patricia" on there.

- Um, that's for you. - Oh, OK. Thank you.

Oh, heh.

Luggage exactly like Patricia's.

How did you know?

[chuckling]

Alright. It's time for Christmas gifts.

Alrighty.

Here we go.

[Deck the Hallsinstrumental]

Thanks, Mom. [overlapping voices]

Wow.

This is, uh, something.

You put a lot of work into this.

Great. Alright, Lynn. You're next.

[throat clearing]

- Did I do something wrong? - No, I did.

Um, it's time to break the family tradition.

Go ahead. [yelling]

- Get me in! - Oh, my gosh!

[indistinct shouting] [laughing and screaming]

Camera!

[indistinct voices]

Thank you very much.

So are you ready for the Christmas concert?

I'll leave pretty soon,

but everything is ready, so there's no rush.

- You're gonna be great. - Oh, thank you.

Well, this has certainly been an eventful Christmas day.

Yes, it has...

and it's not over yet.

I still have one gift left for you.

Oh, you didn't have to do this.

Well, go on. Open it.

I promise you it's not going to explode.

[laughing]

Oh.

How did you find one exactly... like yours?

Oh, I... I can't take this.

- Merry Christmas, Mom. - Oh...

Thank you. Thank you.

Whoa.

Do you want to show it off?

[laughing]: Look.

But it's missing a picture.

Oh, I know exactly what will go there.

That was amazing.

You're amazing.

- Are you OK? - I love you.

- What? - [all]: Nothing.

Nothing at all. Everything's good.

Can I talk to you privately?

- Sure. - Alone?

Absolutely.

[Joy to the Worldinstrumental]

What's up?

Well, this has been a crazy few days.

Yeah. And I should have mentioned this before, but...

- I got fired. - You lost your job?

Yes and no. It's complicated.

What isn't anymore?

Steve... [phone ringing]

[phone ringing] You should probably get that.

Hello, Annie. Merry Christmas.

Yeah, the sound system isn't working.

- What? - [There was a loose wire]

which led to an electrical short, which caused

- a power surge that blew the whole circuit. - Wait, wait. Just slow down.

OK, Cyn. We do not have a music system that works

and there is nobody around to fix it

because today is... well, it's Christmas.

[And without the sound system, nobody will hear the choir.]

- Well, what about the lights? - [Surprisingly, still working.]

Yeah, different circuit. So you know,

we'll have ambiance, just no audio.

OK, we will fix it. One thing I'm certain of is that

you can't have a Christmas concert without Christmas music.

- Yeah, I know. - [I will be there]

in 10 minutes. No, no, wait... 5.

I'll meet you backstage.

OK, great.

[beep] That didn't sound good.

No. Your wife has a lot of work ahead of her.

- What can I do? - A prayer wouldn't hurt.

But listen, I know you're struggling and I want to help.

No, no, look. My problems can wait; yours can't.

- I love you. You know that, right? - Course I do.

And no matter what issues we have, we'll get through them together.

- Right hand... - Left hand.

- I'll see you at the concert? - I wouldn't miss it.

OK.

Gotta run!

♪ ♪

So your brother tells me you lost your job.

Who needs more lawyers

when the world needs poets, right, Jer?

You misunderstood me, Steve. Alright?

The world needs more good lawyers and less bad poets.

You're a very good lawyer, son.

Yeah, except keeping my job means doing something

I believe is morally wrong, and losing it means

ruining all the plans Cynthia and I had.

OK, well, what if the roles were reversed?

What if Cynthia were being forced

into an uncomfortable situation? What would you tell her?

Do what you feel is right. In the end, you gotta live with yourself.

What makes you think she'd offer advice any different?

You'd make a good lawyer, Jer.

You know how to hurt a guy, I'll tell you that much.

[chuckling]

You're gonna be fine. Don't worry.

Can you do me a favour and look after everybody?

- I gotta run a quick errand. - Sure.

[doorbell ringing]

- Oh, hello, Steven. - Mr. Bedouin.

I want to thank you for seeing me on such short notice.

Well, let's make this quick.

My family's waiting for me to do some silly holiday thing.

- Family. Right. - So I assume you've come by

because you've finalized your decision. Ready to come back to the firm?

Well, there is one demand I need to make.

What could you possibly want more than your job back?

My wife's respect, my family's respect

and most of all, my own self-respect.

So where are you going with this?

It's very simple. If any lawsuit against Mr. Bandoni

goes forward, I need to take the lead.

I want to be in the position to crush the opposition.

Great. We'll get you started first thing tomorrow.

- I'll be defending Mr. Bandoni. - Excuse me?

I will be defending Mr. Bandoni in any lawsuit

Jack Knox and your firm care to file.

You're willing to lose your job for him?

Absolutely. It's the only way I can live with myself.

Well, I suggest you take a few days, Steven.

This decision is going to put a significant dent

in that plan of yours.

That won't be necessary. I'm choosing right over wrong here.

And you know, someone I used to respect

once gave me an unasked-for but quite valuable

- life-affirming piece of wisdom. - And what's that?

Plans change.

Oh, and...

Merry Christmas.

♪ ♪

Mom? Owen?

Where is everybody?

"Steven, we went to the concert. Before you come,

"watch this incredible film. I mean it. Do not leave

"until you have watched or I will never speak to you again.

Love, Mom."

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

So can you get the sound system working?

We replaced the breaker, rerouted the power

to the circuit. Now I'm going to rewire the panel

and hopefully we'll be online again.

Hi, everybody. Um, so you may have guessed

we are... we're running a bit later than we thought,

but we are just having some technical difficulties.

Cynthia says this is the best place to see the stage.

This is gonna be great!

Be right back!

[crowd murmuring]

Cynthia! Thank goodness you're here.

- Hi. - OK. Sorry, who is this?

This is Frank. He's the handiest of handymen I know.

- If he can't fix it, nobody can. - I cannot believe

that you found somebody to work on Christmas Day.

Anything for Cynthia... because I owe you one.

My daughter's still talking about her sweet 16.

- How'd you get a cake that big? - Trade secret.

Um, OK. So how long do we think this is going to take?

Just because we're 10 minutes late for the concert, so...

Everything's going to be OK, Annie.

I've had a lot of things go wrong this Christmas,

but it's turned out better than I could have

- ever expected so far. - Well, let's hope this works.

OK, all you need is a little Christmas magic!

[laughing] Alright, great!

Let's grab the choir, get them onstage.

Let's get started!

Fast feet, fast feet. Let's go!

♪ Snow in a one-horse open sleigh ♪

♪ Over the fields we go

♪ Laughing all the way

♪ Bells on bobsleds ring

♪ Making spirits bright

♪ What fun it is to ride and sing ♪

♪ A sleighing song tonight, oh

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way ♪

♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh ♪

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way ♪

♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride

♪ In a one-horse open sleigh, hey ♪

The choir's terrific, aren't they? Everything's perfect.

We have an issue.

I don't like the word "issue," Richard.

OK, so we have a slight bump in the Christmas road.

Mr. and Mrs. Claus aren't coming.

What do you mean they're not coming?

The Delaneys just called and they're having car trouble.

It's Christmas and you can't close a Christmas concert without Santa.

- OK, new plan. Follow me. - ♪ Deck the halls ♪

♪ With boughs of holly Fa la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la 'Tis the season to be jolly ♪

♪ Fa la la la la la la la la

♪ Don we now our gay apparel

♪ Fa la la la la la la la la

- Honey! We're having a ball! - Dad, you're our new Santa Claus.

- What are you talking about? - Well, our old Santa

can't make it, so you got the job!

I gotta go on stage?

Honey, I don't know. There's a lot of people out there.

And now it's your job to entertain them.

And Patricia, you're Mrs. Claus.

Oh, well, I played Lady Macbeth

in my community theatre production.

I can handle Mrs. Claus.

I was afraid to play an oak tree in my grade school play.

Oh, well, just follow my lead, Santa.

- That's the spirit. - Richard, can you get them

in costume? OK. Ah, I love you.

Thank you. Thank you, Dad. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

♪ Fa la la la la la la la la ♪

[cheering and clapping]

OK, Dad, it's time. You are going to be great.

A carburetor I can fix. This I'm not so sure about.

Honey, honey, I can't do this.

- Yes, you can. OK. - I can't!

- Oh, come on. There's our cue. - Oh, very good. Alright.

Ho, ho, ho! Ho, ho, ho, ho!

[cheering]

Ho, ho, ho, everybody!

We... we're...

It's very, very, uh...

...wonderful to be here with all of you!

- Yeah! - She looks so cute.

This is certainly a Christmas that we'll never forget.

Ha. That's correct.

Boy, it reminds me of a funny story

about our dog Sprocket!

[distant voices]

Wow. You really know how to put on a concert.

Well, maybe you haven't heard,

but I have a very talented family.

You're talented.

Your husband's stubborn.

I got fired,

then I got rehired and then I quit.

That's... complicated.

Why?

My boss put me in a position

where I'd have to compromise myself and hurt a good person

along the way.

Then I support your decision 100%.

Are you sure?

Whatever the issue, we will get through it together.

And you're not going to stay unemployed for long!

Any law firm would be lucky to have you.

I am lucky to have you.

So we're going to be parents, huh?

When did you find out?

About a half hour ago.

Mom left me a...

subtle hint that led me

to a DVD in the den.

Why didn't you tell me?

I wanted to.

But I wanted the moment to be special.

Something or someone

just kept getting in the way.

It's the best present I've ever gotten.

Me too,

but doesn't having a baby

create a huge obstacle for our plan?

Are you kidding me?

Who cares about the old plan?

We just lucked into a much better one.

[Jerry]: Is everybody having a fantastic Christmas?

Is that... That's Jerry out there? That's your dad?

[cheering] OK, great!

- Well, I think our work is done. - They love us out here! Hey!

That reminds me of another great little story I gotta tell you.

It's all about my sleigh. I like to call her Ellie.

I gotta take care of this. I've got to get him off. OK.

Alright, guys, we are heading to the stage right now.

- Music, music! - ...North Pole too. You know,

we don't have icebergs anymore. We have ice cubes!

[laughing] Oh, yeah!

Frosty's a puddle! [audience laughing]

♪ ♪

That is enough Christmas cheer for one night, Santa!

- Honey, I got more material. - Trust me, you don't.

What? Oh. Ah.

I just want to thank all of you for joining us this holiday,

especially my family.

Your love and support have truly made this a perfect Christmas.

[applause]

♪ We wish you a merry Christmas ♪

♪ We wish you a merry Christmas ♪

- Oh, let's go! Yeah! - Robin?

- Joe! - ♪ And a happy New Year

♪ Good tidings we bring ♪ - What are you doing here?

I went to bed last night and I realized

that today wouldn't feel like Christmas if I didn't spend it

with you. [laughing]

♪ Oh, bring us some figgy pudding, now bring us ♪

This Christmas has been a complete disaster.

Best disaster of all time.

♪ Good tidings we bring to you and your kin ♪

♪ Good tidings for Christmas

♪ And a happy New Year

♪ We wish you a merry Christmas ♪

♪ We wish you a merry Christmas ♪

♪ We wish you a merry Christma-as ♪

♪ And a happy New Year ♪

[applause]

♪ ♪

Hey, none of that, Joe. It's Christmas.

You have got to try one of these cookies.

Don't mind if I do.

Hey, Mom. Merry Christmas. Jerry. Who's winning?

What do you think, huh?

[chuckling] Daddy's turn.

[baby crying]

- Oh, look, it's snowing. - Hey...

- It's snowing, look! - Snowing!

- It's snowing outside. - Grab your coats.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Let's get outside.

Snow!

[indistinct conversation]

- Ha ha! Look at that! - Oh, wow. Look at that.

Christmas, everybody.

♪ ♪

Growing like a weed, huh?

♪ ♪