Original subtitles

Good morning, Tattoo.

I said good morning.

Oh, good morning, boss.

What are you reading that is so totally consuming?

The stock market report.

Thinking of joining the world of high finance, are you?

I already did, boss. Thank you, my cousin, Hugo.

The stock broker now.

Oh, and what stock, pray tell, did cousin Hugo advise you to invest in?

Top industries?

What? Top industries.

Top industries?

I don't think I recall that name.

Top industries.

The new company is doing real good.

My cousin Hugo said I will double my money in two days.

Forgive my skepticism, Tattoo, but cousin Hugo has been known to

Not this time, boss.

How do you know?

Because if my cousin Hugo was exaggerating, he would have said that I

double my money in one day.

Smile, everyone.

Smile.

Electrician's mate, Barney Shaw, U .S. Navy.

You look like a nice guy.

I bet I know what a sailor's fantasy is. Perhaps, but Mr. Shaw isn't a typical

old -style sailor. He was aboard a nuclear submarine that just completed a

record -breaking two -year underwater endurance test.

You mean he didn't see a woman for two years?

What did he do to kill the time?

Seaman Shaw did a great deal of reading in his off -duty hours.

His area of special study was the ancient myths of the sea.

I don't follow you, boss.

He became expert in all the legends about islands of lost women.

Islands of lost women?

He first discovered the concept in the travels of Ulysses, then found

on the same theme in the Germanic saga of the Lorelei.

It's his fantasy now to find out if such an island tribe of women could exist

today.

Is that really possible, boss?

Take a good look at him.

You won't see many men like him.

Who is he, boss?

A long time ago, a close and good friend.

His name is Singapore Eddie Malone.

And when I knew him, he was considered one of the top professional adventurers

in the world.

Oh, he searched for treasure in the Caribbean, looked for the abominable

in the Himalayas, traveled down the Amazon in a canoe.

I didn't know people still do things like that.

They rarely do, Tatooine. Even Mr. Malone doesn't anymore.

In recent years, he's made his living by giving lectures.

Lectures? What kind of lectures?

Oh, about his adventures, of course.

The most popular these days is I Search for Bigfoot.

He appears in men's clubs, junior high schools, wherever they will pay his $50

fee.

$50? How can he afford a fantasy?

Take heart.

my mercenary friend, Mr. Malone didn't come here for a fantasy.

He thinks he's here to give a series of his Bigfoot lectures.

But, boss, if he's here for somebody else's fantasy, why do they want him?

Is that something to do with Bigfoot?

Perhaps the two, perhaps.

My dear guests, I am Mr. Rock, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

Yes, come in.

Ah, Mr. Shaw. Do come in. Listen, you can come right out and say it, Mr.

I know you believe that I'm crazy to think that an island of lost women

exists.

Indeed.

Perhaps your fantasy is more obtainable than you imagined.

It is? Yes.

Sit down, won't you?

In addition to all the famous myths down through history,

There is a little -known legend about such a civilization on a nearby island,

supposedly the descendants of a Greek ship, which was wrecked on the island

2 ,000 years ago. Of course, no one knows if it's true or not.

Surrounded by treacherous reefs and unscalable cliffs,

only one outsider has ever been reported there.

A bush pilot who crashed on the island over 25 years ago.

Undoubtedly driven mad by loneliness and privation or... An island of

beautiful women.

Whatever. He resisted all attempts to rescue him.

If it was because of the women, I mean, who could blame him?

When do I leave?

Well, we could drop you on the island by parachute this afternoon.

Oh, Mr.

Shaw, I must warn you, however. That island is uncharted.

I have no powers there.

And I'll be unable to guarantee your safety.

You could be risking your life.

What a way to go.

Mr. Rourke, I'll be ready to leave this afternoon.

Very well.

The

film

you're about to see, I shot myself two years ago in the northern reaches of

California. Ladies and gentlemen, Bigfoot!

Now here's where we first spot him.

See?

Now he sees us.

And then... He's gone.

What is he then?

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, you tell me.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

Eddie, I'm sorry I'm late.

Oh, you didn't catch the show, huh? No, I'm afraid not. I came, in fact, just in

time to see that film of a man running around in a monkey suit.

Boss, what are you talking about?

That was Bigfoot.

Well, Singapore shot the film himself.

Of that I have no doubt.

You calling me a fraud, old chum?

I never could fool you, could I?

You mean he was a man in a monkey suit?

Tattoo, I found out a long time ago the rubes won't pay 50 bucks a night to look

at a plaster footprint.

They want to see the whole hairy beast in action. Well, if that's what they

want, that's what Singapore Eddie will show them.

What if you could show them the real thing, Eddie?

All right, I'll bite.

What are you talking about?

I am considering the fulfillment of a fantasy which would allow an expedition

travel to the far side of the island.

The terrain there is mostly jungle, very rugged.

There are some eerie mountains.

There are no roads. But native folklore, going back hundreds of years, tells us

of a giant, hairy, man -like beast that roams the mountains.

Bigfoot.

Well, why not? He's been spotted in most other parts of the world.

What makes you think this expedition would be any more successful than any of

the others?

Frankly, I don't know. I'm a layman.

The idea seems possible to me.

But before I can allow others to risk their lives, I want you to tell me if

think it has a chance.

What I do know is that the plan outlined to me is bizarre, dangerous.

And as far as I can find out, nothing like it has ever been tried before.

And if I like the plan?

I'll arrange for the fantasy to start.

And you can become part of the expedition, if you wish.

What have I got to lose?

Nothing, Eddie.

Are you sure this is the only way to get to the island of the lost women, Mr.

Rourke?

Positive, Mr. Shaw. And I did get the impression you were in a hurry.

Well, here I go.

Grab them!

Oh, wait.

Please.

Well, we'll take her back to camp.

Geronimo!

I think we're safe here.

What manner of a man are you?

Oh, just the guy who wanted to help out. I mean, you were in for a bad

time.

Hey, that's the plane that Mr. Rourke showed me.

You know about such machines?

I just dropped out of one like it a few minutes ago.

Are you a bird man?

Like the first birdman who came from the sky many years ago?

He said he was a god.

Are you a god, too?

Me? What are the pros and cons?

Well, if you were, then I and all the women of my city would be your servants.

Anything would be yours for the taking.

It's the tradition.

Really? You?

And all the girls of the city?

And the girls that you were with before?

Those and many, many more. Well, I guess us birdmen are a very special lot, all

right, yes.

Then command me, my lord.

Well, I think it's time that you led me to my worshippers.

Thank you.

Good afternoon, gentlemen.

Good afternoon.

Professor Smith -Miles, may I introduce Mr. Eddie Malone, Professor.

It's a pleasure to meet you.

The pleasure is all mine.

Oh, gentlemen, won't you sit down?

Thank you.

I've already explained to Mr. Malone why you have come to Fantasy Island,

Professor.

My late father postulated several theories on the creature known as

Malone. For our expedition to be a success, it is necessary that three of

theories be correct.

The first, of course, is that Bigfoot actually exists.

The second, and the most important, the reason my father would write a book on

the creature.

is that he believed that Bigfoot might well be the missing link between ape and

man.

That's very interesting.

The third, and perhaps the most crucial, deals with the reasons why no one has

ever been able to capture Bigfoot.

Which is?

Which is that he always knew he was being hunted.

He sensed the aggression of the hunter.

With an instinct that we call ESP.

Now, wait a minute.

Why wouldn't that explain it? He has been hunted by some of the most expert

huntsmen in the world, including yourself, Mr. Malone.

ESP.

And if, indeed, Bigfoot is the missing link, would it be so strange that he had

ESP? It has been well documented that some of the most primitive people in the

world have it. The natives of Valley, for instance.

Aborigines in Australia. I've seen them use ESP practically like a telephone.

Then you accept the possibility.

Well, if Bigfoot has ESP, how do we catch him?

We don't catch him.

We let him catch us.

With this.

Since earliest caveman, men have worshipped birds, Mr. Malone.

Either real or imaginary, such as this one.

It's a glider.

It's a Schweitzer 233, to be exact.

And if what Mr. Rourke tells me is correct, that is a model of the aircraft

which you won three national championships.

Yes, that's right.

Go on.

The glider would be equipped with this.

Infrared body heat sensing device. These have been used to hunt Bigfoot before,

you know.

Yes, and very successfully.

But in these cases, before the airplane came close enough to the ground to land,

the engine noise scared away the creature.

We make contact.

What then? We change course.

To see if he follows us.

That is correct. And if he does?

We land and let him come to us.

But if he has ESP, won't he know that we're inside the plane waiting for him?

No. I don't think he will.

I'm counting on his curiosity.

To overcome his natural instincts.

You know, it's so simple, I wonder why somebody hasn't thought of it before.

Then you think it will work.

I don't know.

I don't know, but I think you'd be a damn fool not to let us try.

Who is he, Naomi?

A birdman. He saved me from them. He has powers beyond belief.

Really? I'm taking him to the queen now.

The queen.

What is a crime?

Majesty, this keeper of the flames went to pick berries and allowed the cooking

fires to go out.

That is very serious.

The fires must be rekindled before your sisters can cook their food.

I just wanted to see a man, Majesty.

The one who they say will be harvest king this year.

So, you forgot your duties for that.

The punishment must be severe.

Majesty! Majesty!

Another birdman has fallen among us.

Him?

I must think on this.

Carry out the symptoms.

Oh, what's wrong with her?

She allowed the fires in her charge to go out. It requires much work to

them. Oh, no, not really. Try this.

Your Majesty, he is indeed a god.

And he shall be treated as such.

He shall be our harvest king for this year.

He shall be bathed, perfumed, dressed like a god.

Then he will choose your bride.

Bride?

That's plural?

How many do I get? That is for you to say.

Prepare him.

Come, Lord.

I've come.

He is no more a god than the first bird man was.

No one can say when it all began.

That first tick of the time clock for evolutionary man.

Some say two million years ago, and that seems like a long time.

Long enough for man to climb from his barest primitive beginnings to the most

ruthless achievements in today's world.

What special element made him resist violence at all costs, even to the point

not returning hours, even to the point that he fled to the most remote corners

of this earth?

If Bigfoot is the missing link, then we can find out what this...

The special element is we may be rewriting the entire history of mankind

perhaps more important, its future.

Ah, there it is.

Oh, I've dreamed about this for so long.

Professor? Eddie? Morning.

Well, here we are.

The plane has been outfitted to your exact specifications, Professor Smith

-Miles. Wonderful.

All that remains now is for you to decide when you'll want your first

Thank you, Mr. Rourke. I'll be ready first thing in the morning. Very well.

I'm sure Mr. Malone will be, too.

A remarkable lady.

She's remarkable, all right.

A little nuts, maybe, but remarkable.

These girls are candidates for your bride's harvest cake.

Decisions. Decisions.

Oh, I hope there's no hard feelings, girls. No hard feelings. You know, you

don't get picked.

Remember, it's the luck of the draw.

Oh, are you?

You? Hey.

Oh. Oh, and you. Oh, her, too.

Don't want to break up the set.

Oh, gosh.

Oh, and definitely, definitely her.

And her, too.

How many is that?

What does it matter?

Right, right.

Why play favorites? I'll take them all.

Ladies, do your duty.

Must you dedicate so much time to that thicker tape machine to do?

Look, boss. Look.

Topping these trees is our fucking point.

Indeed.

Well, congratulations, my friend.

Perhaps this might be the proper time to take your profits and sell.

No way, boss.

I'm going to buy 50 shares more.

Remember one thing, my friend.

Many a stock market player has been wiped out because of greed.

No sweat, boss.

My cousin, Hugo, will tell me when to sell.

Yes. That's what I'm afraid of.

I am happy, my lord.

Are you kidding?

Like a kid in a candy store.

Happy girl?

What's happening out there?

It's for you, Lord.

Oh, some new honor, huh?

No, my Lord. It's your funeral pyre.

My funeral pyre? I'm not dead yet.

You will be when the flames hit you.

What flames? What flames? What are you talking about?

Your death, Lord.

It's the tradition.

Tradition?

This is it.

Got a cut of glue.

Must have changed your mind.

Not a chance, Bob.

Gotta get them machiniers working.

This is like looking for a needle in a haystack.

The trick is, Mr. Malone, to find that needle.

There's one thing about you, Professor.

When you make up your mind to do something, you go all the way.

It's the only way to fly, Mr. Malone.

The only way.

No, no, it's not big enough.

It's been up two hours. I think we'd better turn back.

Hey, there's always tomorrow, you know.

See?

It can be quite the size of a man.

Let's change course. See if it follows us.

He's following us.

He's still coming.

Well, better pick a spot.

What do you mean?

If our furry friend is so anxious to meet us, I think we ought to accommodate

him. We're going in.

Hang on, Professor.

We'd better get ready.

What's that?

That's the tranquilizer gun.

There's nothing that dark to stop a thousand -pound animal.

No, no, you stay there. No point in both of us being out here.

Ward, your bride's waiting to give you pleasure.

Forget it.

My heart isn't in it.

Look,

honey, if you'll help me get away from him, maybe we'll get the radio and that

old biplane to work.

The queen would make us suffer terribly if we defy her.

What's the matter with that woman, anyway?

Is she responsible for keeping the men away from you?

Oh, no.

Long ago, the women left because the men wouldn't give up fighting.

Now, each year, one man is chosen to be harvest king so a race will survive.

Something like this happened in old Greece a long time ago. I'm not sure it

worked then either.

It's said that Queen Delphia fell in love with the first bird man and wanted

change things.

But after her son was born, the other men came and found the bird man and

him out of jealousy.

Now she's very bitter.

Oh, terrific.

Look, I understand if you're afraid to help, but I'm getting out of here. I'm

going to get that radio. Wait. What?

It's not here.

Is this what you think?

No! No!

No! That woman will be mine. I do not share her with you.

I do not share her with anyone.

Now, look, fella.

We got more serious problems than fighting each other right now. No, I

Right now, I mean it.

She has no objections.

I sure don't.

No. No objections.

We're in the same fix, fella. Right? I mean, we're caught in the middle. None

us can win either way.

What do you mean?

If you take her back to the men, you know what they'll do to her. On the

hand, if we go back to the women, that queen will probably cremate us all.

The way I figure it, it's the four of us against everybody else on this island.

Did you find that helmet and goggles in this plane, too?

They were my father's.

Are you?

You are the son?

You are the son of Queen Delphia and the Birdman?

Yes.

She sent me to live with the men when I was very young.

It's the tradition.

I just got an idea. See if you can get your men to come to the city tonight.

We might solve this whole thing.

There they are, my majesty.

No!

Please! Go on!

Go! Get out of the way! Go on! Go!

Go on! Please! Go on! Please go!

Leave him.

These are the ones we want.

Bring them.

Maybe he lost us.

Listen.

Everything's gone quiet.

Oh, we frightened him.

We frightened him terribly. We frightened him? What the hell do you

to me?

Good Lord, woman, do you realize we just came face to face with Bigfoot?

He does exist.

Well, of course he does, Mr. Malone. We presumed that when we started off on

this venture.

But we can't just stand here. We have to go after him.

You are the most... Doesn't anything faze you?

We are not going after him, not in the dark.

But he'll get away.

No, he won't.

I hit him flush with a dart. From the sound of him, he'll get a couple hundred

yards. When he drops, he'll be out for at least 12 hours.

And if he doesn't drop?

Well, then, my dear professor, we will just have blown the biggest

anthropological discovery of the century.

Lord, I love you. I love you, too, but it's not going to get us out of this

jail.

My Lord, I'm sorry.

Are you really?

Not the fire.

The men are here, but there are so few of them.

It's okay. I wasn't counting on numbers to solve this.

Should we seize the majesty?

No, no, no. It's over. You understand?

And you, Queenie, just keep your mouth shut till I'm finished. How dare you?

Lady, I dare, because you've had things fouled up long enough, and that goes for

you guys, too.

I've done some growing up since I got here.

When I first arrived, I thought a lot of girls would be fun, you know, like a

kid who figures if one scoop of ice cream is good, then ten gallons must be

fantastic. Well, love, love, it doesn't work that way. We're

just a bunch of men and women until we fall in love, and then, well, that's

a wonderful thing happens, and that's when we become more important to...

some one guy or girl than anybody else in the world. And if you're going to

up, that's when you learn that you can't get anything from a hundred women, that

you can't get from one woman who loves you. I

mean... We don't need that kind of love.

Who are you kidding?

I mean, you love the first bird man, and you love his son, don't you?

So why'd you pick me to be harvest king? I mean, wasn't it because you knew your

son was in line for it, and you wanted to save him as long as you could?

Try living together as human beings.

People who live and love, care about one another.

I mean, that's how it was meant to be.

Go on.

Go to each other.

Love each other.

That's what it's all about.

What time is it?

A little before six.

Got some coffee ready.

Oh, thank you.

What's that?

30 -odd thick.

You know, to stop our friend.

But why? If he's still down to tranquilize us, we'll have all we need

photographs and hair and tissue samples.

Well, I'm glad that's all you need, and I certainly will do everything I can to

help you get it.

But the only tissue sample I'm interested in bringing back is the head

hairy beast.

You promised me no guns. You promised me you wouldn't hurt him. Didn't anything

I say about my father's theories matter?

What, about the missing link?

About Bigfoot having some magical element that'll save the world? That all

sounds very nice, but it doesn't make any sense.

You know, you, your father, you live in some never -never world of two million

years ago, and that's very nice for you.

The rest of us have to live in the real world.

And, Professor, my world has been a tearing, grinding one. A guy like me

gets another chance. Well, I've got one, and I'm going to take it.

And you know the hell of it is that if I thought there were one chance in a

million you were right, I'd toss this thing in the bushes.

Not for mankind and not for the world because I don't give a damn about that.

But because of you.

Because you still believe in things that I can't anymore.

It's got to be a foot and a half long.

stumbling around pretty good.

He's trying to bash our skulls out. He's not trying to hurt us.

Can't you feel that? He's trying to warn us. Can't you feel it?

He just wants us to go away.

I'll use this.

If you go any further.

I'll load in that thing. It'll kill me.

Good job, Professor.

There's a whole tribe of them.

What's the matter with you?

Can't you see they don't want to defend themselves?

They outweigh us by hundreds of pounds, and they'd still rather run away than

defend their own home. Doesn't make any difference, Professor.

When we go back and tell the world what's here, they'll all be dead in a

of months. What do you mean?

You think you can stop people who were looking to make millions once it's known

this creature exists?

This whole island will turn into a three -ring circus, and the big feet that are

just shot will die of germs they never even knew existed.

All I want is my piece of the action. Now.

I tried to kill him and he saved my life.

What if we go back and we don't tell the world what we found here?

That Bigfoot really exists.

You'd be throwing away everything your father worked for, everything you've

worked for all these years.

No, no, I don't think so.

Because I think we found what my father was after, what he thought would change

the world.

And the funny thing is, he's been within our reach all along.

Even after you hurt him, he cared more for you.

Than he did for himself.

I'm sorry that your search for Bigfoot was in vain.

Perhaps in the future.

Yes, well, the future is something the professor and I are working on. We

thought we'd start in Turkey.

Turkey?

Mm -hmm. Mr. Malone has plans to find Noah's Ark.

I've contacted my university, and they've agreed to finance the

Oh, marvelous. Congratulations, Eddie. Goodbye.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Goodbye. Come on, professor.

Well, Bob, maybe they didn't find Bigfoot.

But your friend is a different man from the time he came here.

He's on top again.

But why do I get the feeling that it was all your fantasy, boss?

Goodbye, Mr. Rourke. Thanks for everything. I am so glad everything

so well for you, Mr. Shaw. And congratulations to you, Mrs. Shaw, on

excursion into the outside world.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

You know what I think, boss?

About what?

I think you knew all the time about the island of lost women and the problem.

You were just waiting for the right guy with the right fantasy.

So you could help them solve it.

Really?

Interesting theory.

Oh, by the way, tell me, how goes the fortunes of top industry?

I was wiped out, boss.

But at least my cousin Hugo got out in time.

He made a killing.

Oh, that you don't tell me.

You mean the bottom fell out of top industry.