Original subtitles

The plane!

The plane!

Ah,

there you are.

A bit affectatious today, aren't we?

It's part of my new image.

Indeed? And what sort of image did you have in mind?

I want to be more like you.

Strong, silent, mysterious.

Well, they say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. I thank you,

Tatooine. But why do you wish to be like me?

To attract more broad, just like you.

Ladies, Tatooine. We call them lady.

Not the kind I've been attracting.

Miles, everyone.

Miles!

Mr. Harry Bemis, New York City.

He looks like a nice man.

Oh, yes.

Everyone likes good old Harry.

He'll give you the shirt off his back when he has it to give.

You mean another freeloader?

Rest easy, my mercenary friend. Mr. Bemis is a paying guest.

thanks to a 30 -to -1 long shot that won by three lengths.

Oh, a gambler. Mm -hmm.

Maybe I can interest him in a friendly game of chess.

That would be most unwise and costly.

You see, Tattoo, Mr. Bemus' fantasy is one shared by every gambler the world

over. For this weekend, Mr. Bemus is going to become the luckiest man in the

world.

The young lady is Miss Edith Garvey. Her life's ambition is to be a singer.

Miss Garvey wants to be a very special type of singer, Tattoo.

She wants to be a torch singer like her grandmother was in Chicago during the

Roaring Twenties.

First, that could cost a fortune.

She could even get hurt or killed.

My dear guests, I am Mr. Rourke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

What are you reading, Tattoo?

Oh, it's the new book to go with my new image.

The title is How to Speak with More Color.

Oh.

Hark! Who knocks at yonder door?

How was that, boss?

Oh, splendid, Tattoo.

Hi. Oh, hi.

Ah, Mr. Beamers. Come in.

Mr. Roark. Well, are you ready to begin your fantasy?

I'm in the starting gate. I'm ready to go. Good. Sit down, please.

Tattoo?

No, not for me. It's a little too early in the day for booze. Thank you.

Ah, but this is something very special, Mr. Beamers.

Have you ever heard of Diamond Jim Brady?

Diamond Jim? Sure.

By his time, he was just about the luckiest dude going.

They say everything he touched turned to gold.

My sort of guy.

Well, then you should surely appreciate the elixir contained in that goblet.

It came from Diamond Jim Brady's private stock.

And magic, too.

Magic?

Tattoo.

It is said Mr. Brady always fortified himself with a little glass of this

special elixir before entering into any business negotiations.

And, as you say, he was just about the luckiest dude around.

Now, let me get this straight. All I have to do is bring some of that stuff

my fantasy begins?

Why don't you try it and find out?

A $20 bill? I found a $20 bill.

Ah, there you see. Your luck is changing already.

Well, this certainly looks like your lucky day.

Two lucky days, Mr. Rourke. That's what you promised me.

Two days I've waited for all of my life.

Well, come on, Andrew Jackson. I got big plans for you.

Well, enjoy, Mr. Beamer.

Enjoy. Thank you, Mr. Rourke. Thank you.

as my $20 deal.

Oh, cheer up, Tattoo.

Think of your new image.

Surely there is a colorful quote to cover the loss of your money.

There is?

Yes.

Finders, keepers, losers, weepers.

How do I look?

Splendid. The perfect flapper. A tattoo?

A real red hot mama.

Oh, thank you.

Well, how do I begin?

But now the first thing you must remember is the name Kitty Aveline. That

be your name, your professional billing during your fantasy.

Kitty Aveline.

Your transportation to Chicago and the Roaring Twenties.

You can really do that?

Oh, indeed. You see, many, many people who still remember the Roaring Twenties

as glamorous, exciting, romantic, they want to relive them, and they all come

Fantasy Island.

Oh, I'm getting so excited already.

Well, then I suggest you get started.

You have a long way to go.

That's right. A few years backward.

Hello, Kitty.

All right, come on now. Two sixes. That's all I want.

Two sixes. Here we go.

Yeah!

Read them and weep.

Unbelievable. Come on, pay up. Eighty dollars. Let's go. Come on. One, two.

That's beautiful.

Thank you, sir. Come again.

How about you, pal? Still trying?

Are you kidding?

Playing with you is kamikaze time.

I never saw anything like it.

Name's Harry, right?

Yeah, Harry Beamish.

You can call me Lucky.

Okay, Lucky. Let us in.

What have you got? A new system?

New system? I got a streak going, that's all. I'm hot. I'm hot.

Well, why'd you play the horses?

Got a horse parlor on this island?

I'm going over there right now.

Lead the way, pal. Come on, lead the way. Lucky?

Yeah? Mind if I tag along?

Oh, I'd love you to tag along. What do I look to see now? Come on, let's... How

about me, Lucky? Yeah, you too. You can tag along. All I need now is a redhead

and I got a mad set.

Will I do, Lucky?

Oh, will you do? Yes, you'll do.

Thank you, Mr. Rourke. Let's go.

It's luck, darling.

Strictly luck.

He's got the world in his trust. Hey,

thank you.

Mr. Bimmers. Yeah. What do you like on the last press?

I'm going to put everything I got on Zim Zam. You do the same. Zim Zam? Well, I

don't know about that. Come on, Zuma. Let's talk this one over.

You don't want to do it? Okay.

All right. Do you hear what the man says?

Everything on Zim Zam.

Zim Zam to win. You're covered.

I'm lost.

The horse is gone.

here for me? Why else would I be pounding the pavement like this,

with my altar kicking up? Come on, we're on our way to my office. We'll stop

there. You'll sign the papers. I'll get you all dolled up. I want you to look

good for Big Al.

Who's Big Al?

Oh, sweetheart, let's stop playing games, huh? I'll go through it just one

time. Please.

Now, Big Al's comic, the one he stole from Bugsy McGowan, he gets his throat

cut. By Bugsy.

In a fit of temper, no doubt.

He's dead?

No, he's in the hospital.

For once, he's the one in stitches.

A comic in stitches, you get it?

Anyway, Big Al needs somebody fast to go on for him at the Kit Kat Club, and I

sell him you, sight unseen.

Me? Yeah, sweetheart, it's the break of a lifetime.

If he likes you, the sky's the limit.

Oh, but what if he doesn't like me?

Oh, then you and I are in very large trouble.

But if you don't want to give it a try... Oh, I do. Yes, I do.

Well, what are we waiting for? Come on, let's go!

Good afternoon, Mr. Demas.

Is everything satisfactory?

Like I died and went to heaven, Mr. Lord. That good?

Well, I'm very pleased.

I'm pleased, too. Thank you.

Taking advantage of a guest's fantasy for personal gain is shameful.

What do you have to say for yourself?

Wait a minute, boss.

Money is not the root of all evil.

No money is.

Fred sent me.

That's him now. The one you got to play to. Big Al Calucci. Make that mutt cry

like I told you.

The sky's the limit.

Out of your arm, kid.

Let's go.

Now, sweetheart, don't be nervous. Just give the man your music.

You can read, can't you?

I can read anything you can put on paper.

Neil Mark.

Kitty, Abilene.

Nice to meet you. Hey, hey, let's get with it. Come on, come on. Big Al is

waiting. Which key, miss? Uh, B -flat.

Yeah, yeah, B -flat, B -flat.

Ladies and gentlemen, the club Kit Kat is proud to present that new singing

sensation, Miss Kitty Appley.

Now, let me tell you, this better be good, or that crumbo major will be

for a concrete overcoat.

You made me love you I

didn't want to do it I didn't want to do it

You made me want you

And all the time you knew it I

guess you always knew it

Made me glad.

But there were times, dear,

you made me feel so bad.

You made me cry for I

didn't want to tell you.

I didn't want to tell you.

I want some love.

That's true.

Yes, I do.

Did I do? You know I do.

Isn't she wonderful?

Well, what do you say, big gal?

Would I steal your wrong? Has she got it or has she got it?

A winner for a dance contest.

Mr. Harry Bimmer and his lovely partner.

Come on.

Beautiful.

Mr.

Bimmer, I must talk to you.

Yeah, well... And now.

Please. Okay.

Don't go away. Don't go away.

Before you say anything, may I tell you something?

You really came through. This is the best fantasy.

I can't tell you. Mr. Bemis, a cable has arrived from your ex -wife.

Hey, I sent the alimony. Oh, no, this has nothing to do with alimony.

Your ex -wife's sister, Blanche, has been taken ill.

And that's it? Yes.

Blanche is sick? Yes.

Mr. Roark, Blanche is a hypochondriac. She wouldn't be happy unless she was

sick. I see. Well, in any event, your ex -wife had to leave New York hurriedly

to care for her sister, and she sent something along for safekeeping.

That's my son, Joey.

Hi, Dad.

Joey. Dad.

Aren't you glad to see me, Dad?

Sure I'm glad to see you. I'm always glad to see you.

Give me a hug.

Joey.

You'll get tennis elbow from that much brushing. Let's go. Come on.

Why do I have to go to bed so early? Early? Since when has 11 .30 been early

an 11 -year -old?

Now, come on. Sit this side.

You see those teeth?

You know,

it's good to see you. It's good to see you, too.

How's your mama?

She's okay.

She, uh... She been seeing anyone special lately?

Just a couple of chumps. You know, real suckers. Not high rollers like us.

What kind of language is that, Joey?

What kind of, Dad? Right?

Right.

Good night, Dad.

Good night, Dad.

You going back to the party?

Well, I'd planned to.

But suddenly I don't feel much like it.

Oh, Mr.

Ames, how good to see you. Please, come in. Come in.

I hope I'm not disturbing you, Mr. Rourke. Oh, not at all, Mr. Ames, not at

Come here. I just wanted to stop by to say thanks.

Well, I assume the fantasy you requested has been fulfilled.

Oh, in spades, Mr.

Rourke, in spades.

There I was, standing in the meadow.

And the spaceship landed, what's it, more than 100 yards from me.

It sounds most exciting.

Oh, but that's not the end of it.

A little green man got out, and we conversed.

Indeed. What about?

Well, I'm not quite sure. I was very nervous, and he spoke with an accent.

Martian, I expect.

I can't wait to get home. I'll be the talk of the UFO Club for weeks to come.

Thank you. Thank you.

So that's what it is.

You have a Martian accent.

Oh, I still can't believe last night really happened.

And today.

Oh, it's been the nicest, sweetest afternoon of my life.

Thank you, Neil. Don't thank me.

It's been one of the nicest afternoons of my life, too. Well, then I hope we

spend a lot of afternoons together.

Whoa!

Okay.

Whoa!

I'm getting old.

Hey, you know you were sensational last night.

And with Big Al behind you, you can be as big a star as you want to be. You've

already been in all the papers. You're riding on a magic carpet.

Well, it's big enough for two.

It's your dream, Neil.

You must have one. Everyone has.

Not to spend the rest of my life playing in places like Kit Kat Club?

Well, then what?

Do you really want to know?

I really do.

Well, then come with me.

Back to my room.

Will you?

Not too good, Joey. I need a 10 to win.

See if we can do it.

Yeah!

Wasn't that bad at all. Give you a chance to get even.

No way. Then pay up. Come on, let's go.

Willie, Willie, you too.

I'll teach you to bet against me, okay?

Was that great? Yeah.

Having a good time? Enjoying yourself?

Yeah, this place is just like the Fountain of Blue.

there for the doggers?

Sure, that's the time we made the killing on the X -Acto, right? Yeah,

were really great times. Hey, listen, wait a minute.

Here's five bucks. Go get yourself soda pop, anything you want. Oh, thanks, but

there isn't time now.

The horse parlor opens in ten minutes.

Yeah, Harry, let's go to the horse parlor. You can go to the horse parlor

time, okay? Wouldn't you rather hang around here and play?

No way, man. I want to be where the real action is.

I'll see you as soon as I get dressed.

Yeah, but Joey... Come on, Harry.

Come on, Harry, let's go, okay?

It's beautiful.

Why did you stop?

It's all there is. The concerto was never finished.

Why haven't you finished it?

I don't know.

No one's ever cared about me and my music before.

Well, someone is now more than interested.

Will you promise me you'll finish it?

Okay, I promise.

And I'll dedicate it to you.

Thank you.

Oh, thanks, Dad.

We're doing okay, huh? Yeah.

Oh, thanks, Dad.

Okay.

Who do you like in the race after next?

Well, I don't know. Let's take a look.

Who do you like?

I like Dandy Jim.

Dandy Jim?

Okay, Dandy Jim it is.

How's school going, champ?

Uh, I haven't been going much.

What do you mean by that?

Dad, it's too big a hassle.

Hassle?

What kind of talk is that, Joey?

Hey, I said not now.

Dad,

the race.

Does your mother know you've been cut in school?

You kidding? She'd kill me.

Hey, listen.

Now, school's important, Joey. You've got to get an education.

You never got an education.

Well, it's different.

How?

What's happening to you, Joey?

Don't worry about me, Dad. I'll be fine.

That's what you think.

No, really.

See, I'm going to grow up and be a real winner, just like you.

Thank you,

boys. Nice job. Nice job.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, the club Kit Kat is proud to present Big Al's new

singing sensation.

The girl all Chicago's talking about. And the star of our show, Miss Kitty

Abilene.

me and let me be lonely you won't believe

me and I love you only I'd rather be lonely

than happy with somebody else

I pay off everybody down at City Hall.

From the men's room janitor to the mayor.

And they're raiding my joint?

Remind me to call his honor in the morning.

Hey, Big Al.

Don't we know that big palooka? He ain't no real cop.

It's Moose Maloney.

It's Bugsy Swilligan.

Say, what in the hell's going on around here?

Like me to tell you, Big Al?

You stole my comic.

Got all Chicago laughing at me.

Think I'm gonna let you get away with that?

And just what do you think you're gonna do about it?

I'm gonna grab your new canary.

Moose, bring the broad.

Sure thing, boss.

No! Hey, wait, wait, wait a minute. Look, she's not gonna be any good unless

play for her. Oh, yeah? So you come too.

dirty, lousy scum up to now, believe me.

Just wait. Come on, let's go.

Strange that a man of your unlimited luck would spend his time pitching cards

into a hat.

Suddenly I don't feel so lucky, Mr. Rourke.

Oh?

Surely all is in order.

Tattoo tells me you have had considerable success betting on the

Sure. Horses, cards, dice, things.

I can't lose.

Except maybe the father.

You know what my turn -of -the -day ambition is, Mr. Rourke?

He wants to be just like me.

Oh.

You must be very proud.

Proud?

I'm a bum, Mr. Rourke, a two -bit gambler. Nobody would want their kid to

like me.

But in your son's eyes, you are a very big man.

That's a lie.

I'm not a big man.

I'm a man who once lost his car on a sure thing, lost his house on a

World Series, and lost his family and any decent friends because he couldn't

stop gambling.

The boy only knows what he sees, and he loves you very much,

Mr. Bemis.

And I love him.

I love him more than anything in the world.

And that's what's gonna hurt.

Hi, Dad.

What are you doing with my chicken?

I'm sending you home where you belong.

Home?

But I want to stay here with you.

No chance.

Did I do something wrong?

Yes, you did something wrong. You came here to Fantasy Island uninvited.

I was having a ball, a real ball, till you showed up.

But I thought you'd be glad to see me.

Yeah, well, you were wrong. I was putting on a big front.

Dad, please don't send me home.

What's the matter with you? Can't you understand? Are you stupid or something?

You're cutting into my action.

Let me tell you something.

Your old man's a loner, a drifter.

No ties.

I come and go as I please. I do what I want when I want.

And I can't operate like that with a snot -nosed kid like you hanging around

neck.

But you said you loved me.

So what else is new?

I lied.

Anyway, love is strictly for suckers.

Dad, please don't talk like that.

I want to stay with you forever.

Living with Mom's no fun.

She's nothing but a square.

Don't you ever say anything against your mother. Do you understand?

I understand.

Please, Dad.

Can't we be friends?

You really are stupid, aren't you?

You never heard a word I said.

I'm going to arrange with Rourke to have you on that morning plane. And until

then, stay out of my life.

Look what we got, folks.

Snatched right off the stage at the Kit Kat.

Big Al's prized canary, Miss Kitty Abilene.

All right.

All right, sweetheart.

Give.

You expect me to sing?

I expect you to knock him dead.

You remember that?

Comic in the hospital?

Come

on,

it's okay.

Just relax.

Love me or leave me?

That's fine.

And let me be lonely You won't believe me And I

love you only I'd rather be lonely

In the kitchen, there's an icebox.

Next door is the delivery window. You can get through it. Now go!

My music!

I'll get it! No, I can't leave without it! Kitty, will you get out of here?

Harry.

Hurry before it's too late.

Mr. Rourke.

Come.

No, I can't. Come, come. You must get out of here.

Please.

Fortunately, I have the best wheelman in the business.

How can you reach the brake?

Brake?

What's the brake?

Come on.

We can't leave. Not now. I've got to find Neil. He has to come with us. Your

fantasy is over, Kitty.

Miss Garvey, better to just leave.

No. No, I've got to go back.

Miss Garvey.

Miss Garvey.

I'm sorry, Mr. Garvey.

But I told you, your fantasy is over.

As you can tell from the dust and cobwebs, no one has been here for 50

Well, hello, Joey.

Mr. Rourke, it's not fair. It's just not fair.

What? My fantasy didn't come true, and you promised.

I promised to reunite you and your father. Now, that I did.

But I meant it for keeps.

Joey, your father is sending you away for your own good.

It's not for my own good.

I want to stay with him.

Sit down, Joey. Sit down.

Joey, you told your father you wanted to grow up and be just like him, didn't

you? Mm -hmm. Well, that frightened him.

Why? Because your father doesn't like what he is.

He's a winner.

Not always, Joey.

As a matter of fact, very seldom is he a winner.

Because of his gambling, he lost you and your mother.

Those were the biggest losses of all.

Well, your father loves you, Joey.

So much so that he's trying to drive you away.

To prevent you from following in his footsteps, don't you see?

Well, that's the reason I acted that way. So he would like me.

And then we could stay together.

The trouble is, he doesn't like himself.

He never will.

Not until he gives up gambling.

Well, maybe I can help him give it up.

Do I still have to go home?

I'm afraid so, Joey.

Well, in that case, I think you should refund me the $5 I paid you for my

fantasy. Not so fast, my friend. Not so fast. I have a big overhead here.

Besides, your plane doesn't leave until morning.

And a lot can happen between now and then.

Come. Where?

You'll see.

Your $500.

I raise.

Joey has something to tell you, Mr. Bemis.

You had no right to bring him here, Mr. Rourke.

Talk to your son, Mr. Bemis.

It's important to you both.

Is it all right, fellas?

About a minute?

What is it, Joey?

Well, it's just that I promised not to grow up and be a gambler.

If that's what you want.

What makes you think I care?

Something Mr. Rourke said.

Dad, please come home again.

I don't think that's going to be possible.

Sure it is.

Mom still loves you.

How'd you know that?

She said it. I heard her tell Aunt Martha.

It won't work, Joey.

I'm a gambler.

You can quit. I know you can.

Please, Dad.

At least you can try.

Hey, Lucky.

You gonna play or not?

What was it to me again?

Five thousand.

Three.

Four.

Five.

I call. What do you got?

Three tens.

Beats me.

I guess lucky Bemis just retired.

Oh, Dad.

I am very pleased to see father and son living together.

Likewise, Mr. Rourke. And I just want to say, coming to Fantasy Island was the

best bet I ever made.

You are going back to your wife, Mr. Bemis.

She'll have me, yep.

I finally realized the luckiest man in the world was me when I had my family

together.

Come on, Dad, let's get a window seat.

Thank you, Mr. Rourke.

Yes, Joy.

Goodbye, Mr. Bemis, and...

Good luck.

Right. Thank you.

Bye, Gato. Bye -bye.

Well, Miss Darby, I hope your fantasy was not a disappointment.

I wouldn't say it was a disappointment. I wouldn't want to do it again.

But I wouldn't have missed it.

Showbiz in the Roaring Twenties was a real killer.

Tell me something, Miss Darby. Are you still a Roaring Twenties buff?

Oh, even more so now that I've been there.

Then I'm truly pleased.

Here comes someone I think you know.

Well, you're not the only one with a fantasy on this island, Miss Darling.

Neil, I came back to find you. By then, the fantasy was over.

But that doesn't mean we can't start a brand new one.

Look, boss, I found a $20 bill.

Perhaps it belongs to Mr. Bemis. Oh, if you hurry, you can catch him.

Catch him?

Boss, you forgot a very profound thing.

Which one is that?

Finance, keeper.

Ah, but you forgot a more important one.

I did?

You owe me $20 from your salary advance.

Boss, that's not very profound.

All right, how about this one, then? A fool and his money are soon parted.