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1
00:00:12,677 --> 00:00:14,095
[clattering]
2
00:00:15,365 --> 00:00:18,311
Lily, I think
Eddie's home from school.
3
00:00:18,372 --> 00:00:19,943
His books just came in.
4
00:00:22,853 --> 00:00:24,042
[cups shattering]
5
00:00:24,101 --> 00:00:25,519
I hate the whole world.
6
00:00:25,573 --> 00:00:27,046
I'll never talk
to anyone again.
7
00:00:27,108 --> 00:00:29,007
Never, never!
8
00:00:29,061 --> 00:00:30,828
Never, never,
never, never!
9
00:00:31,077 --> 00:00:32,168
Herman.
10
00:00:32,549 --> 00:00:33,575
Herman.
11
00:00:33,924 --> 00:00:35,790
[Herman moaning]
12
00:00:36,037 --> 00:00:37,543
[steam hissing]
13
00:00:41,125 --> 00:00:44,649
Oh, Herman, what's happened?
Where's Eddie?
14
00:00:44,869 --> 00:00:48,426
Lily dear, I don't want to come
to any hasty conclusions...
15
00:00:48,484 --> 00:00:50,885
but I think our little boy
is rather upset.
16
00:00:52,516 --> 00:00:53,902
Really, Herman.
17
00:00:56,133 --> 00:00:57,453
Tea anyone?
18
00:01:59,972 --> 00:02:03,464
I'm worried. It must be
something serious with Eddie.
19
00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:05,870
He didn't even
come down for supper.
20
00:02:06,596 --> 00:02:08,713
I say
it's the modern way of living.
21
00:02:08,772 --> 00:02:11,118
When I was his age, a kid
would go out in the back...
22
00:02:11,173 --> 00:02:13,705
dig in the dirt
and bury his frustrations.
23
00:02:15,044 --> 00:02:16,998
Well, something's
bothering him.
24
00:02:17,445 --> 00:02:20,937
Maybe our little Eddie has found
out about the birds and the bees.
25
00:02:20,996 --> 00:02:24,521
I know I didn't sleep for two weeks when
I found out that their making honey...
26
00:02:24,580 --> 00:02:25,966
was just a sideline.
27
00:02:26,021 --> 00:02:27,526
There's something
wrong all right.
28
00:02:27,589 --> 00:02:30,218
I just knocked on Eddie's door
and he howled at me.
29
00:02:30,277 --> 00:02:31,401
Oh, my-
30
00:02:31,941 --> 00:02:34,057
That is a bad sign.
31
00:02:34,117 --> 00:02:36,779
He usually doesn't howl
until the moon comes up.
32
00:02:37,828 --> 00:02:38,821
Herman.
33
00:02:38,884 --> 00:02:43,500
Herman, as head of the house, I think
you should get to the bottom of this.
34
00:02:43,557 --> 00:02:48,270
Now, you go right on upstairs and have
a father-and-son talk with your boy.
35
00:02:48,453 --> 00:02:51,148
My gosh, Lily, I'm not very
good at that, you know, dear.
36
00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:52,677
You're his mother.
37
00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:55,851
Why don't you go up and have a
father-and-son talk with him?
38
00:02:55,908 --> 00:02:59,149
No. A thing like that
is up to the father.
39
00:02:59,621 --> 00:03:02,534
Anyone who's watched Father
Knows Best for nine years
40
00:03:02,597 --> 00:03:04,015
ought to know that.
41
00:03:04,900 --> 00:03:09,068
All right, but Donna Reed always handles
these things on her show, you know.
42
00:03:15,204 --> 00:03:17,998
Oh, I don't know what
you are all worried about.
43
00:03:18,565 --> 00:03:20,551
In my time,
when I was his age...
44
00:03:20,612 --> 00:03:22,729
all us Draculas
were spoiled rotten.
45
00:03:23,621 --> 00:03:28,204
Well, Grandpa, all children can't
have the advantages we had.
46
00:03:36,228 --> 00:03:39,306
Eddie, are you in there?
47
00:03:39,493 --> 00:03:40,998
[Eddie howling]
48
00:03:42,436 --> 00:03:44,814
Eddie, don't use
that tone of voice with me.
49
00:03:44,868 --> 00:03:47,563
This is your father.
Now open the door.
50
00:03:50,597 --> 00:03:51,851
[door creaking]
51
00:03:52,548 --> 00:03:55,527
Thank you. Now, Eddie.
52
00:03:55,588 --> 00:03:59,823
I have come up here so that we might
have a little father-and-son talk.
53
00:04:00,644 --> 00:04:03,274
Why don't you come
right over here and sit down?
54
00:04:06,500 --> 00:04:07,460
Fine.
55
00:04:09,028 --> 00:04:10,828
Now, what seems
to be the trouble?
56
00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:14,343
They sent me home from school today
with a note from my teacher.
57
00:04:14,405 --> 00:04:17,864
I see, and what have you done
with this note from your teacher?
58
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:18,884
I ate it.
59
00:04:20,581 --> 00:04:22,414
That was very
naughty of you.
60
00:04:22,468 --> 00:04:25,447
You know that we do not like
you eating between meals.
61
00:04:25,509 --> 00:04:26,535
I'm sorry.
62
00:04:27,301 --> 00:04:28,622
Now, let me see.
63
00:04:29,253 --> 00:04:32,363
If you came home with a note
from your teacher...
64
00:04:32,420 --> 00:04:35,181
we can safely assume
that there was some trouble.
65
00:04:36,100 --> 00:04:37,060
Hmm?
66
00:04:37,220 --> 00:04:38,180
Hmm.
67
00:04:39,269 --> 00:04:43,557
And trouble usually involves
poor academic performance.
68
00:04:44,388 --> 00:04:48,142
Viz., to wit, and ergo,
you failed arithmetic.
69
00:04:48,197 --> 00:04:49,288
No, sir.
70
00:04:49,348 --> 00:04:51,018
History?
No, sir.
71
00:04:51,077 --> 00:04:54,285
Citizenship?
No, sir. I flunked tonsils.
72
00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:55,460
Aha!
73
00:04:56,164 --> 00:04:57,419
You see, my boy.
74
00:04:57,476 --> 00:04:59,909
You should not have taken the
course in the first place...
75
00:04:59,973 --> 00:05:01,893
if you did not think
you were up to it.
76
00:05:01,957 --> 00:05:03,823
No, Pop, my tonsils.
77
00:05:03,877 --> 00:05:06,823
The school nurse looked in my mouth
and said I had crummy tonsils...
78
00:05:06,884 --> 00:05:10,158
and I ought to have a doctor look at
them and they might have to come out.
79
00:05:10,212 --> 00:05:13,573
I don't want them to come out,
'cause they're the only ones I got.
80
00:05:13,636 --> 00:05:15,142
Now, now, now, Eddie.
81
00:05:15,204 --> 00:05:18,477
Having your tonsils out
is a very minor operation.
82
00:05:18,885 --> 00:05:20,685
There's nothing to it.
83
00:05:20,741 --> 00:05:23,403
They'll have them out as fast
as you can say Jackie Robinson.
84
00:05:23,460 --> 00:05:24,846
Are you sure, Dad?
85
00:05:24,933 --> 00:05:29,287
Sure, I am sure. Your old dad has learned
never to get upset or emotional...
86
00:05:29,349 --> 00:05:31,248
over minor medical matters.
87
00:05:31,813 --> 00:05:35,818
Now, just open up your little mouth
and let your old dad have a look-see.
88
00:05:36,324 --> 00:05:37,710
[chuckling]
89
00:05:38,373 --> 00:05:39,562
Tonsils.
90
00:05:40,164 --> 00:05:41,124
[moans]
91
00:05:44,676 --> 00:05:45,997
[rumbling]
92
00:05:49,412 --> 00:05:51,049
Mom! Grandpa!
93
00:05:51,173 --> 00:05:54,829
Pop hit the deck, right in the
middle of our father-and-son talk.
94
00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:59,500
3:00
and all's rotten as usual.
95
00:05:59,557 --> 00:06:00,811
[sawing]
96
00:06:07,012 --> 00:06:08,104
Oh, 3:00.
97
00:06:08,164 --> 00:06:11,754
I just hope Herman gets Eddie to the
doctor's in time for his appointment.
98
00:06:11,812 --> 00:06:14,060
It doesn't pay
to neglect a boy's tonsils.
99
00:06:14,116 --> 00:06:17,509
But what do you need with a doctor?
I could have taken care of it.
100
00:06:17,572 --> 00:06:19,143
You?
Sure.
101
00:06:19,684 --> 00:06:21,932
When I used to fly
around in Transylvania...
102
00:06:21,989 --> 00:06:25,415
I was one of the busiest throat
specialists in the country.
103
00:06:26,693 --> 00:06:30,086
Oh, now, there was a business a
fellow could sink his teeth into.
104
00:06:30,373 --> 00:06:32,588
You know, that Dr. Willoughby
is a good doctor.
105
00:06:32,645 --> 00:06:34,761
But I wish he wasn't
so nearsighted.
106
00:06:34,821 --> 00:06:37,254
Last year, when Herman
broke his leg skiing...
107
00:06:37,316 --> 00:06:41,638
he came here on a house call and he
put a splint on Herman's bedpost.
108
00:06:47,397 --> 00:06:50,124
Well, let's take a look
at his tonsils, all right?
109
00:06:51,524 --> 00:06:52,965
Now, my boy-
110
00:06:54,404 --> 00:06:57,765
Now, just open wide like this.
111
00:06:58,276 --> 00:06:59,367
Ah!
112
00:07:00,196 --> 00:07:01,255
That's it.
113
00:07:01,572 --> 00:07:06,024
Say, that's the worst looking
set of tonsils I've ever seen.
114
00:07:06,628 --> 00:07:07,720
[Willoughby grunts]
115
00:07:07,780 --> 00:07:11,818
And look, why, there's a little hole
in the back of them right there.
116
00:07:11,876 --> 00:07:14,222
We'll have to sew that up
immediately.
117
00:07:14,277 --> 00:07:17,321
Doctor, you're looking at your
own tonsils in the mirror.
118
00:07:17,413 --> 00:07:18,373
Huh? Ooh!
119
00:07:19,556 --> 00:07:23,113
They used to yell at me about that
at Johns Hopkins all the time.
120
00:07:23,877 --> 00:07:25,644
We might as well
take his temperature.
121
00:07:25,701 --> 00:07:27,567
It never hurts to do that,
you know.
122
00:07:27,621 --> 00:07:29,574
After all,
he might have a fever.
123
00:07:30,341 --> 00:07:33,833
Here, this isn't going to do your
throat any good, smoking cigars.
124
00:07:33,893 --> 00:07:35,333
Now, where is
that thermometer?
125
00:07:35,397 --> 00:07:37,317
It's right there
in your pocket.
126
00:07:37,733 --> 00:07:39,173
Yes, of course.
127
00:07:40,580 --> 00:07:42,447
My goodness.
128
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:44,650
Slippery little rascal,
isn't it?
129
00:07:46,757 --> 00:07:50,445
Why, you have no temperature at all.
You're not sick.
130
00:07:50,532 --> 00:07:53,064
But let's have a look
at those tonsils anyway.
131
00:07:53,125 --> 00:07:55,307
Now, just open up, please.
132
00:07:55,524 --> 00:07:56,877
[mumbling]
133
00:07:57,092 --> 00:07:59,308
What is he saying,
Mr. Munster?
134
00:07:59,364 --> 00:08:01,318
He says
he won't open up his mouth.
135
00:08:01,381 --> 00:08:03,432
And that
you're a ratfink doctor.
136
00:08:04,580 --> 00:08:06,250
We won't have any of that.
137
00:08:06,309 --> 00:08:09,833
Come on now, junior, open up your
mouth and I'll give you a lollipop.
138
00:08:10,053 --> 00:08:11,406
[mumbling]
139
00:08:11,492 --> 00:08:14,122
Would you get him to open
his mouth, Mr. Munster?
140
00:08:14,340 --> 00:08:16,523
If I do,
will you give me a lollipop?
141
00:08:16,677 --> 00:08:19,787
I'll give you a hit in the head if
he doesn't open his mouth soon.
142
00:08:19,844 --> 00:08:21,263
I'll tell you that.
143
00:08:21,348 --> 00:08:22,734
You heard him, Eddie.
144
00:08:22,789 --> 00:08:25,997
Now, open up your mouth
for the nice ratfink doctor.
145
00:08:26,852 --> 00:08:27,944
Well, okay.
146
00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:29,867
You're a kind boy.
147
00:08:29,925 --> 00:08:31,398
The kind I don't need.
148
00:08:31,460 --> 00:08:32,453
Let's see, there.
149
00:08:32,516 --> 00:08:34,470
It's dark in there,
all right.
150
00:08:34,948 --> 00:08:36,170
Just a moment.
151
00:08:36,868 --> 00:08:37,992
[grunts]
152
00:08:38,053 --> 00:08:39,919
Do you see his tonsils,
Doctor?
153
00:08:39,973 --> 00:08:41,675
I see a lot of goodies.
154
00:08:42,405 --> 00:08:44,686
That pancreas is real boss.
155
00:08:44,933 --> 00:08:47,017
But those tonsils
will have to go.
156
00:08:47,076 --> 00:08:50,503
I'll get him to a real tonsil man.
It won't hurt him a bit.
157
00:08:50,596 --> 00:08:53,455
He'll only have to spend a few
days in the doctor place.
158
00:08:53,509 --> 00:08:56,520
Shucks, I'll miss being in the
school play this Saturday.
159
00:08:56,580 --> 00:08:59,210
I was supposed to play the wolf
in Little Red Riding Hood.
160
00:08:59,269 --> 00:09:01,385
I've been practicing
my howl all week.
161
00:09:01,445 --> 00:09:04,522
Now, now, Eddie. I'm sure the
doctor knows what's best.
162
00:09:04,933 --> 00:09:06,668
Yes. Before you leave,
Mr. Munster...
163
00:09:06,724 --> 00:09:08,710
would you care
to have a look-see?
164
00:09:09,060 --> 00:09:10,020
[mumbles]
165
00:09:10,468 --> 00:09:11,461
Do I have to?
166
00:09:11,524 --> 00:09:12,746
Why not?
167
00:09:12,996 --> 00:09:15,080
After all,
you wouldn't be squeamish...
168
00:09:15,141 --> 00:09:18,534
about looking at a silly
little old tonsil, would you?
169
00:09:19,333 --> 00:09:21,548
No, I guess not.
170
00:09:32,036 --> 00:09:33,389
[rumbling]
171
00:09:33,604 --> 00:09:36,877
Hit the dirt! Earthquake!
Every man for himself!
172
00:09:39,876 --> 00:09:42,637
Eddie's tonsils came out
with no trouble at all.
173
00:09:42,692 --> 00:09:43,751
Yes.
174
00:09:43,812 --> 00:09:45,318
And when we left him
in the hospital...
175
00:09:45,380 --> 00:09:48,392
he was sitting up in bed
eating ice cream.
176
00:09:48,677 --> 00:09:51,503
You see, Herman,
I told you it was no big deal.
177
00:09:51,557 --> 00:09:54,284
You stayed home and hid in
the closet for nothing.
178
00:09:54,405 --> 00:09:56,718
Come on, let's go right down
and see him.
179
00:09:57,092 --> 00:10:01,414
Herman, Dr. Willoughby thought it
best if you didn't go and see him.
180
00:10:01,477 --> 00:10:03,212
But why not?
I'm his dad.
181
00:10:03,268 --> 00:10:07,109
You see, dear, he explained to
me that he didn't want you...
182
00:10:07,204 --> 00:10:09,321
walking into Eddie's room
and upsetting him...
183
00:10:09,380 --> 00:10:12,840
by crying and screaming
and fainting and all that.
184
00:10:13,156 --> 00:10:16,648
The medical term he used
was "going ape."
185
00:10:20,484 --> 00:10:22,186
What are they talking about?
186
00:10:22,245 --> 00:10:24,645
Why shouldn't we go down there
and see him?
187
00:10:24,709 --> 00:10:27,109
Do they think that
a man of my background...
188
00:10:27,172 --> 00:10:29,453
is going to faint
at the sight of blood?
189
00:10:29,861 --> 00:10:32,458
I'm sorry,
but that's doctor's orders.
190
00:10:32,516 --> 00:10:34,436
You'll see Eddie tomorrow.
191
00:10:34,788 --> 00:10:37,734
They just don't want you
down there tonight.
192
00:10:38,116 --> 00:10:41,030
Come on, Marilyn. Good night,
Grandpa, Uncle Herman.
193
00:10:42,116 --> 00:10:45,870
All right, Herman.
What are you going to do now?
194
00:10:46,277 --> 00:10:49,965
I guess I'll just go upstairs and put
on my Al Jolson record of Sonny Boy...
195
00:10:50,021 --> 00:10:51,788
and cry myself to sleep.
196
00:10:52,293 --> 00:10:53,581
No, you won't.
197
00:10:53,636 --> 00:10:56,550
We're going to go down there
tonight and see that boy.
198
00:10:56,645 --> 00:10:59,788
Lily might found out
and she might yell at me...
199
00:10:59,844 --> 00:11:01,710
and not make me
my chocolate-chip cookies...
200
00:11:01,764 --> 00:11:04,012
and all sorts of
mean stuff like that.
201
00:11:04,964 --> 00:11:07,976
Lily won't know. We'll
sneak out of the house later.
202
00:11:08,036 --> 00:11:11,146
And when we get to the hospital,
we'll surprise everybody.
203
00:11:12,996 --> 00:11:14,088
[both chuckling]
204
00:11:14,148 --> 00:11:17,607
You know, for a rotten old
father-in-law, you're really a fun guy.
205
00:11:22,276 --> 00:11:24,175
[wind whooshing]
206
00:12:08,037 --> 00:12:09,029
Grandpa?
207
00:12:10,596 --> 00:12:12,516
Grandpa, I can't see.
208
00:12:12,581 --> 00:12:13,934
Give me a hand.
209
00:12:17,412 --> 00:12:19,431
Come on along,
come on.
210
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:26,888
Watch it.
Sorry, fella.
211
00:12:29,092 --> 00:12:31,438
Wait a minute.
There is Eddie's woof-woof.
212
00:12:31,493 --> 00:12:32,999
Let's take it to him.
213
00:12:40,741 --> 00:12:41,701
[sighing]
214
00:12:51,524 --> 00:12:53,063
Just checking, Herman.
215
00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:11,851
Excuse me, lady.
Could you help us?
216
00:13:13,348 --> 00:13:14,308
[gasps]
217
00:13:15,397 --> 00:13:18,158
You poor man.
When did it happen?
218
00:13:18,725 --> 00:13:20,165
Just this afternoon.
219
00:13:20,229 --> 00:13:21,647
Oh, dear.
220
00:13:21,701 --> 00:13:23,305
You should have
brought him in sooner.
221
00:13:23,365 --> 00:13:25,798
I would have,
but his wife wouldn't let me.
222
00:13:26,309 --> 00:13:29,833
You just stay right there and
I'll get a couple of attendants.
223
00:13:31,940 --> 00:13:36,010
They certainly give very fine service here.
We don't need any attendants.
224
00:13:36,069 --> 00:13:39,725
Eddie is in 517.
We can find it by ourselves.
225
00:13:39,972 --> 00:13:41,326
Come with me.
226
00:13:43,589 --> 00:13:45,989
We'll take the elevator
to the fifth floor.
227
00:13:53,668 --> 00:13:54,890
[gasps]
228
00:13:58,597 --> 00:13:59,885
[crashing]
229
00:14:00,453 --> 00:14:01,741
[rumbling]
230
00:14:05,157 --> 00:14:06,510
[clattering]
231
00:14:07,204 --> 00:14:09,037
The equipment
must be faulty.
232
00:14:09,540 --> 00:14:11,723
Come on, we'll have
to take the stairs.
233
00:14:20,261 --> 00:14:23,207
I don't see him.
He was standing right here.
234
00:14:23,268 --> 00:14:26,094
If he's as bad as you described,
he couldn't have gone very far.
235
00:14:26,148 --> 00:14:28,200
The two of them
were unbelievable.
236
00:14:28,676 --> 00:14:30,543
I must have been
seeing things.
237
00:14:30,596 --> 00:14:34,285
Miss Hazlet, I think you've
been working too many nights.
238
00:14:38,917 --> 00:14:39,877
[sighs]
239
00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:42,341
Hermy.
240
00:14:51,941 --> 00:14:53,032
[exclaims]
241
00:14:56,453 --> 00:14:57,610
Marilyn!
242
00:14:59,652 --> 00:15:01,420
Marilyn, come here!
243
00:15:07,461 --> 00:15:10,123
I thought it felt like
he needed a haircut.
244
00:15:10,372 --> 00:15:13,002
What is it, Aunt Lily?
Look.
245
00:15:13,477 --> 00:15:15,561
Herman has flown the coop.
246
00:15:15,620 --> 00:15:18,894
Oh, dear. Now, where could he
go at this hour of the night?
247
00:15:19,044 --> 00:15:20,201
I don't know.
248
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:25,388
Unless he went to the Theda Bara Film
Festival at the all-night movie.
249
00:15:26,084 --> 00:15:27,655
Now there, Aunt Lily.
250
00:15:27,748 --> 00:15:31,054
Underneath it all, you know that
Uncle Herman is really good...
251
00:15:31,109 --> 00:15:33,008
and kind and true.
252
00:15:34,277 --> 00:15:35,847
You're right, dear.
253
00:15:35,909 --> 00:15:38,920
But I just wish
he wasn't such a goofball.
254
00:15:50,020 --> 00:15:53,676
"No visitors after 8:00.
Authorized personnel only."
255
00:15:53,733 --> 00:15:54,725
Darn!
256
00:15:54,789 --> 00:15:57,320
I guess we'll just have to go
home without seeing Eddie.
257
00:15:57,381 --> 00:16:00,938
Now, Herman. Listen, what's it gonna
hurt if we sneak in and see Eddie?
258
00:16:00,996 --> 00:16:04,204
But, Grandpa,
the doctor might see us.
259
00:16:04,261 --> 00:16:05,865
And he might get angry.
260
00:16:05,925 --> 00:16:09,798
And I don't want to run into any more
mad doctors in my lifetime, thank you.
261
00:16:10,692 --> 00:16:12,744
Okay, we'll use subterfuge.
262
00:16:25,381 --> 00:16:28,938
Instant authorized personnel.
I'm a doctor.
263
00:16:29,700 --> 00:16:31,338
What about me?
264
00:16:31,781 --> 00:16:33,930
I got it.
Come with me, Herman.
265
00:16:35,748 --> 00:16:37,167
Just lie down.
266
00:16:37,220 --> 00:16:39,140
But, Grandpa--
267
00:16:39,205 --> 00:16:41,998
Please, would you listen to me?
Now lie down, please.
268
00:16:42,853 --> 00:16:44,904
Get yourself nice
and comfortable.
269
00:16:48,869 --> 00:16:50,025
Tuck you in.
270
00:16:50,660 --> 00:16:52,046
There. Now...
271
00:16:52,357 --> 00:16:55,914
just lie still, and I'll wheel
you right into Eddie's room.
272
00:16:58,821 --> 00:17:01,931
Wait a minute.
Where are you going?
273
00:17:02,180 --> 00:17:05,094
I'm going to sneak around the corner
and see if the coast is clear.
274
00:17:05,156 --> 00:17:07,469
Now, you just lie there
and be still.
275
00:17:16,772 --> 00:17:18,540
Those careless orderlies.
276
00:17:18,596 --> 00:17:21,772
They left another emergency
patient lying around out here.
277
00:17:28,964 --> 00:17:30,023
Herman.
278
00:17:32,388 --> 00:17:33,348
Herman.
279
00:17:34,660 --> 00:17:35,620
Herman.
280
00:17:38,564 --> 00:17:39,754
[muttering]
281
00:17:39,812 --> 00:17:40,838
Herman.
282
00:17:41,061 --> 00:17:42,021
Herman.
283
00:17:44,932 --> 00:17:47,432
Doctor,
this was out in the hall.
284
00:17:47,492 --> 00:17:51,879
The boys probably went on their coffee break.
Well, let's have a look at him.
285
00:17:53,668 --> 00:17:54,661
[gasps]
286
00:17:55,301 --> 00:17:57,101
I'm afraid we're
too late with this one.
287
00:17:57,156 --> 00:18:00,267
Doctor, this is the man who
came in here a few minutes ago.
288
00:18:00,324 --> 00:18:02,441
That's me all right.
He's alive!
289
00:18:03,045 --> 00:18:04,518
You've got to be kidding.
290
00:18:04,580 --> 00:18:07,308
I just came in to see my boy
who had his tonsils out today.
291
00:18:07,364 --> 00:18:09,580
Listen to that, Doctor,
he's delirious.
292
00:18:09,732 --> 00:18:12,646
Now, just take it easy,
fellow.
293
00:18:13,412 --> 00:18:15,878
Were there any other survivors?
I don't know.
294
00:18:16,069 --> 00:18:18,185
We better give him
a shot to calm him down.
295
00:18:18,245 --> 00:18:20,329
Good idea.
But I...
296
00:18:21,189 --> 00:18:23,950
Just relax, sir.
297
00:18:31,141 --> 00:18:32,974
Now, just a minute.
298
00:18:35,589 --> 00:18:36,910
[needle pinging]
299
00:18:40,389 --> 00:18:43,051
Not making those needles
like they used to.
300
00:18:43,588 --> 00:18:46,567
I tell you, I just came in
to see my little boy.
301
00:18:46,629 --> 00:18:48,233
Now you guys,
cut this out.
302
00:18:48,709 --> 00:18:49,930
Herman?
303
00:18:49,989 --> 00:18:51,855
Here, Herman.
304
00:18:53,636 --> 00:18:56,812
Doctor, what's the matter?
I lost a patient.
305
00:18:57,445 --> 00:19:00,653
Look, you don't tell on me,
I don't tell on you.
306
00:19:03,140 --> 00:19:04,100
Herman.
307
00:19:07,940 --> 00:19:10,635
But I tell you,
lam not an accident victim.
308
00:19:10,693 --> 00:19:12,395
I'm not! I'm not!
I'm not!
309
00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:15,944
I'm just an ordinary average citizen
and I want to get out of here.
310
00:19:16,005 --> 00:19:19,529
Give him a shot of gas, so we can at least
calm him down enough to examine him.
311
00:19:19,589 --> 00:19:22,316
Gas, but I am trying to
tell you-- Just be careful.
312
00:19:22,373 --> 00:19:25,319
Breathe out
and breathe in, please.
313
00:19:25,380 --> 00:19:26,701
[Herman mumbling]
314
00:19:27,269 --> 00:19:28,458
[gas hissing]
315
00:19:36,357 --> 00:19:39,630
First time lever saw that happen.
Keep feeding it to him.
316
00:19:40,197 --> 00:19:43,525
We better scrub up and then get
the chief resident, Dr. Monroe.
317
00:19:44,037 --> 00:19:46,121
Will the gas have
any ill effects, Doctor?
318
00:19:46,180 --> 00:19:48,493
No, it's just nitrous oxide.
319
00:19:48,549 --> 00:19:50,448
He'll wake up
feeling happy as a lark.
320
00:19:50,501 --> 00:19:52,814
They used to refer to it
as laughing gas.
321
00:19:53,060 --> 00:19:55,014
That's fine. Come on.
322
00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:03,620
Herman.
323
00:20:05,509 --> 00:20:06,469
Herman!
324
00:20:08,164 --> 00:20:09,157
Herman.
325
00:20:09,220 --> 00:20:11,817
What are you doing here?
This is the emergency room.
326
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:13,579
What are they doing to you?
327
00:20:13,989 --> 00:20:16,237
[babbling]
328
00:20:17,412 --> 00:20:18,766
Darn, he's asleep.
329
00:20:18,820 --> 00:20:22,279
Come on, Herman, you've got to get up.
I have to get you out of here.
330
00:20:22,341 --> 00:20:23,759
[chuckling]
331
00:20:26,244 --> 00:20:29,005
All right now,
iddy-biddy-widdle-Herman.
332
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,894
It's time to get up.
333
00:20:30,948 --> 00:20:33,927
Grandpa's going to
take you, bye-bye.
334
00:20:34,276 --> 00:20:36,938
Oh. boy, bye-bye.
335
00:20:38,245 --> 00:20:39,303
[laughing]
336
00:20:46,916 --> 00:20:49,546
Where on earth can Herman be?
337
00:20:49,604 --> 00:20:52,332
Why would he sneak out
like this without telling me?
338
00:20:52,389 --> 00:20:55,116
Maybe he felt depressed
and couldn't get to sleep.
339
00:20:55,460 --> 00:20:59,181
He might have taken a walk in the
cemetery, that usually cheers him up.
340
00:20:59,556 --> 00:21:03,365
I get so mad at him when he pulls
something stupid like this.
341
00:21:04,581 --> 00:21:09,000
But he is a good father
and a good husband.
342
00:21:10,020 --> 00:21:12,137
Conscientious, sober--
343
00:21:12,197 --> 00:21:13,834
N'[Herman singing]
344
00:21:15,780 --> 00:21:16,904
What's that?
345
00:21:17,765 --> 00:21:20,526
That sounds like
some tanked-up playboy to me.
346
00:21:20,676 --> 00:21:23,273
N[Herman continues singing]
347
00:21:24,004 --> 00:21:28,292
Marilyn, that tanked-up
playboy is your Uncle Herman!
348
00:21:30,341 --> 00:21:33,319
♪ Darling, I am growing old ♪
349
00:21:34,308 --> 00:21:37,167
♪ Silver threads
among the gold N
350
00:21:42,373 --> 00:21:44,239
Hey, Grandpa,
this is neato.
351
00:21:44,741 --> 00:21:46,792
Listen, sweetie,
you got great place here.
352
00:21:46,852 --> 00:21:49,318
I hope we are not too late
for the floorshow.
353
00:21:49,989 --> 00:21:53,000
Herman Munster,
tonight of all nights...
354
00:21:53,060 --> 00:21:55,047
with your son
lying in the hospital.
355
00:21:55,109 --> 00:21:58,055
How could you come home
in this condition?
356
00:21:58,116 --> 00:22:01,739
I'm not in this condition, I'm
just full of gassing laugh.
357
00:22:02,341 --> 00:22:03,781
Uncle Herman.
358
00:22:03,845 --> 00:22:07,151
To see you now, no one would ever
think you were a charter member...
359
00:22:07,204 --> 00:22:08,874
of the Pat Boone Fan Club.
360
00:22:09,572 --> 00:22:12,104
Now, listen, he'sjust
full of laughing gas.
361
00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:13,157
[stuttering]
362
00:22:13,220 --> 00:22:14,442
Be quiet!
363
00:22:15,044 --> 00:22:17,739
When we sneaked into the
hospital to see Eddie...
364
00:22:17,797 --> 00:22:19,717
the doctors thought
he was a patient.
365
00:22:19,780 --> 00:22:22,181
Herman, is this true?
366
00:22:22,853 --> 00:22:24,107
Sure it's true.
367
00:22:24,484 --> 00:22:27,343
And if it hadn't been for this
friendly little penguin here...
368
00:22:27,397 --> 00:22:30,757
I never would have made it home.
Thank you, little penguin.
369
00:22:31,429 --> 00:22:34,440
♪ Red sails in the sunset ♪
370
00:22:34,500 --> 00:22:36,814
♪ Away up in the blues ♪
371
00:22:36,868 --> 00:22:38,701
Wait, that's not the words.
372
00:22:38,788 --> 00:22:39,847
Uh...
373
00:22:39,909 --> 00:22:42,254
♪ Darling, I am growing old N
374
00:22:45,221 --> 00:22:47,599
So you see, Eddie, like I
told you from the beginning.
375
00:22:47,653 --> 00:22:50,893
Having your tonsils out was
nothing to worry about at all.
376
00:22:50,949 --> 00:22:53,863
Gee, no, Pop. They were real
nice to me in the hospital.
377
00:22:53,925 --> 00:22:55,529
They let me
crank the bed up and down...
378
00:22:55,589 --> 00:22:57,324
and eat ice cream
and watch television.
379
00:22:57,380 --> 00:23:00,010
Wasn't that nice?
Yeah, and you know something?
380
00:23:00,069 --> 00:23:03,691
On daytime television, they have the
re-runs of the late, late show.
381
00:23:04,325 --> 00:23:07,849
You know, Eddie, I still
have my original tonsils.
382
00:23:07,909 --> 00:23:10,408
The first time the doctor
looked at them, he said:
383
00:23:10,468 --> 00:23:14,222
"My boy, you'll carry those
tonsils with you to your grave."
384
00:23:14,277 --> 00:23:17,004
And he was right.
I've done it many times.
385
00:23:17,284 --> 00:23:19,947
Pop, would you like to
look at my tonsils?
386
00:23:20,420 --> 00:23:21,413
Oh, uh...
387
00:23:21,476 --> 00:23:24,968
Well, I can't. The doctor took
them out, down at the hospital.
388
00:23:25,349 --> 00:23:28,492
Sure, but I brought them home
in ajar. I'll go get them.
389
00:23:29,156 --> 00:23:30,116
Son!
390
00:23:30,916 --> 00:23:34,375
"Brought them home in ajar."
Now, isn't that cute.
391
00:23:34,468 --> 00:23:35,690
[moans]
392
00:23:42,596 --> 00:23:45,640
3:00, and the knucklehead
is still out of tune.
393
00:23:45,957 --> 00:23:46,917
[sawing]
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