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1
00:00:02,190 --> 00:00:05,210
What are we going to do when they lay us
off? We're not going to get laid off.
2
00:00:05,990 --> 00:00:06,990
Look around you.
3
00:00:07,450 --> 00:00:09,290
Lance is selling off everything we have.
4
00:00:10,130 --> 00:00:11,130
Game over, man.
5
00:00:11,810 --> 00:00:12,810
Game over.
6
00:00:12,870 --> 00:00:16,550
If we get laid off, we'll just collect
unemployment for a while. We'll be fine.
7
00:00:17,110 --> 00:00:19,270
Okay, what about free access to
production equipment?
8
00:00:19,490 --> 00:00:21,710
How are we going to keep shooting and
editing our own things now?
9
00:00:22,050 --> 00:00:22,988
Don't worry.
10
00:00:22,990 --> 00:00:25,850
We'll put our efforts back into shin
pads and we'll get it finished before we
11
00:00:25,850 --> 00:00:26,689
get fired.
12
00:00:26,690 --> 00:00:28,790
Trust me, I got it all worked out.
13
00:00:29,030 --> 00:00:30,030
No, you don't.
14
00:00:31,830 --> 00:00:32,830
What's up, dude?
15
00:00:32,870 --> 00:00:34,790
I'm looking for Tonto DeWitt.
16
00:00:35,110 --> 00:00:38,530
Uh, sorry, buddy. There is no one here
named Tonto.
17
00:00:38,830 --> 00:00:41,470
And, uh, 1987 is down the street.
18
00:00:42,190 --> 00:00:44,430
Good evening, Holliston!
19
00:00:45,890 --> 00:00:46,890
Or right there.
20
00:00:47,250 --> 00:00:48,250
What's up, dude?
21
00:00:48,790 --> 00:00:50,010
Rockin' and rollin'. How about you?
22
00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:51,329
What's up?
23
00:00:51,330 --> 00:00:54,970
Listen, I don't know how you found out
where I work, but, uh, I don't sign
24
00:00:54,970 --> 00:00:57,050
autographs except that shows. Sorry,
man.
25
00:00:57,470 --> 00:00:59,150
I'm, uh, looking for Tonto DeWitt.
26
00:00:59,630 --> 00:01:01,070
Sorry, buddy. We told you.
27
00:01:01,390 --> 00:01:02,850
There's no one here named Tonto.
28
00:01:03,110 --> 00:01:04,110
Yeah.
29
00:01:05,530 --> 00:01:08,410
Tonto? My parents were big fans of the
Lone Ranger.
30
00:01:09,730 --> 00:01:13,430
You didn't think I was born with a name
as badass as Lance Rocket, did you?
31
00:01:14,410 --> 00:01:15,410
What's your name, kid?
32
00:01:16,210 --> 00:01:17,210
I'm Dean.
33
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Dean Schneiderman.
34
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But my friends call me Valentino. Well,
35
00:01:22,370 --> 00:01:23,930
your spandex pants kick ass.
36
00:01:29,130 --> 00:01:32,130
You got a Diver Down flyer for me to
sign or something, Valentino Fox?
37
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Diver Down?
38
00:01:33,470 --> 00:01:35,670
Is that that band -handling cover band
from New York?
39
00:01:36,190 --> 00:01:37,990
Or the one in Baton Rouge, Detroit or
San Fran?
40
00:01:41,390 --> 00:01:42,390
Damn!
41
00:01:43,410 --> 00:01:47,790
Hey, uh, Dean, you wouldn't happen to
know bands like, uh, I don't know, the
42
00:01:47,790 --> 00:01:51,470
Enough's Enough, Bang Tango, or, uh,
Twisted Sister?
43
00:01:51,830 --> 00:01:52,830
Who?
44
00:01:53,210 --> 00:01:54,210
Danger Danger?
45
00:01:54,310 --> 00:01:56,010
If it ain't metal, it's clock!
46
00:01:56,630 --> 00:01:57,630
Play it loud!
47
00:02:10,759 --> 00:02:14,660
I regret, and I haven't won the lottery
yet.
48
00:02:15,220 --> 00:02:22,200
I'd burn into the hole. I ain't got no
place to go. Why
49
00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:23,780
does it end?
50
00:02:45,770 --> 00:02:47,630
I'm sorry, kid. You must be mistaken.
51
00:02:47,890 --> 00:02:50,570
The Rock has got no random missiles out
there.
52
00:02:50,870 --> 00:02:52,610
Kids are totally not metal.
53
00:02:52,990 --> 00:02:56,650
Don't you remember playing a show in
1990 at a club called Hammerheads on
54
00:02:56,650 --> 00:02:58,210
Island with a band called Social
Disease?
55
00:02:58,950 --> 00:02:59,950
Social Disease?
56
00:03:00,490 --> 00:03:01,910
It was a Bon Jovi tribute band.
57
00:03:02,810 --> 00:03:05,050
Have you only ever been in cover bands,
Lance?
58
00:03:05,470 --> 00:03:09,210
Nobody wants to hear originals. Ever
been to a concert, Adam? The minute they
59
00:03:09,210 --> 00:03:14,190
say, this one's off the new album, the
place clears out. Well, apparently, you
60
00:03:14,190 --> 00:03:18,110
and my mom poured some sugar all over
each other in the club's bathroom. I
61
00:03:18,110 --> 00:03:21,170
poured some sugar all over a lot of
people in bathrooms.
62
00:03:21,890 --> 00:03:24,290
Thank God he still hasn't poured some
sugar on me.
63
00:03:25,210 --> 00:03:27,130
I'm sorry, kid. I'm not your dad.
64
00:03:27,530 --> 00:03:28,690
Yes, you are.
65
00:03:32,110 --> 00:03:35,270
My mom has pictures of you and her
banging in the club's bathroom. She has
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00:03:35,270 --> 00:03:39,630
spandex thong that says social disease
across it. And I got a DNA test off of
67
00:03:39,630 --> 00:03:40,630
from your sweat.
68
00:03:40,710 --> 00:03:42,070
That means nothing.
69
00:03:43,350 --> 00:03:44,350
Okay.
70
00:03:50,050 --> 00:03:53,690
What Nikki Sixx's real name?
71
00:03:55,050 --> 00:03:58,670
Frank Carlton Serafino Ferrena Jr.
72
00:04:23,020 --> 00:04:23,979
Hey, Corey.
73
00:04:23,980 --> 00:04:27,220
Hey, I just came by because Adam said he
wanted me to meet his new girlfriend.
74
00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:28,219
Have you met her yet?
75
00:04:28,220 --> 00:04:29,179
No, not yet.
76
00:04:29,180 --> 00:04:32,360
Adam did a DJ gig over at Ashen Roller
Skating Palace a few weeks back. He met
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00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:33,360
her there.
78
00:04:34,460 --> 00:04:35,239
Hey, guys.
79
00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:36,240
Hey.
80
00:04:36,620 --> 00:04:37,620
Hey, guys.
81
00:04:39,740 --> 00:04:42,320
You have to a girl paint a bird named
Bear?
82
00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:44,700
You must be Joe.
83
00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:46,400
Hi. Hi, Bailey. Welcome.
84
00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:47,319
Thank you.
85
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:48,740
And this is Joe's girlfriend, Laura.
86
00:04:49,260 --> 00:04:51,580
I was painting a masterpiece, but
whatever.
87
00:04:52,539 --> 00:04:54,060
Cheese and crackers.
88
00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:57,140
Did you paint this?
89
00:04:57,720 --> 00:04:59,220
I love the fire.
90
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:01,720
It's beautiful.
91
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:04,600
She's a keeper.
92
00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:07,540
And Bailey, this is my friend, Corey.
93
00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:09,040
I'm Bailey.
94
00:05:10,340 --> 00:05:11,340
Aww.
95
00:05:13,700 --> 00:05:15,340
This is a joke, right?
96
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:21,520
Adam warned me that you might be a
little jealous. And it's okay.
97
00:05:22,300 --> 00:05:28,080
Listen, I know you two used to date, but
believe me, I'm not worried.
98
00:05:28,660 --> 00:05:29,660
Oh, good.
99
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:30,680
Good.
100
00:05:30,840 --> 00:05:32,600
Bailey, sweetheart, where's your mommy?
101
00:05:34,260 --> 00:05:35,860
My mom died last year.
102
00:05:37,220 --> 00:05:38,700
Way to bring up your mom, Chloe.
103
00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,200
Uh, Bailey, would you like a drink?
104
00:05:41,980 --> 00:05:43,460
Yeah, do you have any Capri Sun?
105
00:05:43,740 --> 00:05:46,280
Ooh, brand name. Sorry, too expensive.
106
00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:48,420
I'll take a glass of milk, then.
107
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:49,700
One milk coming up.
108
00:05:50,380 --> 00:05:54,390
Bailey. Um, sweetheart, where's your
daddy or your legal guardian? Does
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00:05:54,390 --> 00:05:55,410
know she's here?
110
00:05:56,370 --> 00:05:57,590
Does someone know you're here?
111
00:05:58,950 --> 00:06:01,070
That old beat -up Barbie is really mean.
112
00:06:01,710 --> 00:06:03,190
I know, right?
113
00:06:03,810 --> 00:06:04,810
Here you go.
114
00:06:04,830 --> 00:06:05,830
One glass of milk.
115
00:06:06,150 --> 00:06:09,550
Thank you. You're very welcome. Uh, just
really quick. Okay.
116
00:06:10,490 --> 00:06:11,429
It's still good.
117
00:06:11,430 --> 00:06:13,270
Sometimes it gets spoiled after a few
months.
118
00:06:13,490 --> 00:06:14,490
All right.
119
00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:19,710
Mmm. Is this skim milk? We add water.
120
00:06:20,110 --> 00:06:21,110
Makes it last longer.
121
00:06:22,150 --> 00:06:23,150
Puffer!
122
00:06:25,050 --> 00:06:28,350
Red Skittles, can you hold this for me
for a second? I can, Purple Skittles.
123
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:29,430
Wait a minute.
124
00:06:29,470 --> 00:06:30,470
Skittles?
125
00:06:30,530 --> 00:06:34,030
Yeah, you know, red and purple are the
two best flavors. You put them together
126
00:06:34,030 --> 00:06:35,790
and it's like... You know, I got it.
127
00:06:37,010 --> 00:06:40,590
That's a really funny joke, you guys,
but I'm not buying it. Although you
128
00:06:40,590 --> 00:06:41,650
a total cutie pie.
129
00:06:42,330 --> 00:06:46,110
You are adorable, but you guys, I'm not
going to fall for this.
130
00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:49,280
Look at that painting over there. It's
so crazy.
131
00:06:50,380 --> 00:06:53,180
Corey, I think you might have left your
keys out on the patio.
132
00:06:53,660 --> 00:07:00,120
I don't think I did. I think you did.
You were right.
133
00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:02,180
She is tenacious, right?
134
00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:05,540
You know what? Maybe after you guys show
me the rest of your place, I can see
135
00:07:05,540 --> 00:07:06,540
one of your movies.
136
00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:13,680
Well, that's the thing. We actually
haven't totally finished one yet, but
137
00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:16,180
we have one done, you are so invited to
the premiere.
138
00:07:17,030 --> 00:07:20,090
Jiminy Cricket. I think we'll come here.
Absolutely.
139
00:07:21,250 --> 00:07:22,930
I want to go, too.
140
00:07:23,450 --> 00:07:24,890
Oh, please.
141
00:07:25,490 --> 00:07:27,970
Steve, you're my girlfriend. Of course
you can go.
142
00:07:33,370 --> 00:07:35,090
Come on. Let me show the rest of the
place.
143
00:07:35,650 --> 00:07:37,470
Oh, my goodness.
144
00:07:37,870 --> 00:07:41,750
I love her.
145
00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:53,900
Join us next week when Joe and I teach
you how to make your own realistic
146
00:07:53,900 --> 00:07:57,420
maggots. Tons of creepy crawly fun.
147
00:07:58,040 --> 00:08:02,180
And a stupid romantic comedy that they
force us to show right here on the Movie
148
00:08:02,180 --> 00:08:04,440
Crypt with Adam and Joe. See you next
week.
149
00:08:04,940 --> 00:08:06,000
And we're out.
150
00:08:06,460 --> 00:08:08,620
Good evening,
151
00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:11,920
Hollister!
152
00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:17,440
Hey, why don't you guys loosen the
bandanas? Then you'd be able to walk
153
00:08:18,360 --> 00:08:20,560
Never. Losing the bandanas.
154
00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:25,220
Sorry. We've been in my office all night
comparing record collections. My boy
155
00:08:25,220 --> 00:08:27,160
here's got a thick bunch of tunes.
156
00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:31,380
The old man didn't even know Babylon A
.D. had a second album. Can you believe
157
00:08:31,380 --> 00:08:32,380
that?
158
00:08:32,780 --> 00:08:34,600
Rock! Let me hear you!
159
00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:35,840
Come on!
160
00:08:36,860 --> 00:08:38,880
All they're missing is the pyrotechnics.
161
00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:40,080
Wait for it.
162
00:09:18,610 --> 00:09:21,150
We'll tear your soul apart.
163
00:09:22,150 --> 00:09:23,150
Hellraiser, drink.
164
00:09:25,610 --> 00:09:27,330
I'm not very good at this game.
165
00:09:27,610 --> 00:09:30,450
I know, right? I call it the they -say
-stuff -and -I -drink game.
166
00:09:31,410 --> 00:09:34,710
Hey, guys, I went by the place to try to
find you. Oh, hell no.
167
00:09:37,930 --> 00:09:39,370
What are you doing?
168
00:09:41,050 --> 00:09:42,050
It's coke.
169
00:09:42,390 --> 00:09:43,650
I don't like alcohol.
170
00:09:45,610 --> 00:09:47,910
I don't like herpes either.
171
00:09:48,750 --> 00:09:50,330
You're going baby to a bar.
172
00:09:50,790 --> 00:09:51,790
Oh, sweet home Alabama.
173
00:09:52,150 --> 00:09:53,150
Drink.
174
00:09:54,790 --> 00:09:57,170
Adam, can I please talk to you?
175
00:09:58,030 --> 00:09:59,030
Yes?
176
00:09:59,170 --> 00:10:00,170
Can I talk to you?
177
00:10:03,430 --> 00:10:04,910
Him? Who is that?
178
00:10:05,270 --> 00:10:07,370
No, can I talk to you in private for a
second?
179
00:10:09,090 --> 00:10:10,310
I have to go potty anyways.
180
00:10:12,250 --> 00:10:13,250
Best friend, Laura.
181
00:10:14,090 --> 00:10:15,830
Let's go potty, best friend, Bailey.
182
00:10:17,370 --> 00:10:19,510
Now, what is your problem now?
183
00:10:19,930 --> 00:10:21,030
What is my problem?
184
00:10:21,470 --> 00:10:23,990
She just went potty, Adam.
185
00:10:25,230 --> 00:10:27,790
I'm going to buy another round for a
wedding, okay? Um, Corey?
186
00:10:28,190 --> 00:10:31,250
Actually, yes. I would love a whiskey
straight. Thank you, Joe. Got it.
187
00:10:36,050 --> 00:10:37,050
First,
188
00:10:38,990 --> 00:10:41,830
I assumed this was just another one of
your little jokes, but now I'm getting
189
00:10:41,830 --> 00:10:44,630
worried you're actually hanging out with
that girl.
190
00:10:44,990 --> 00:10:47,450
What, do you think you're just going to
go through your whole life?
191
00:10:47,770 --> 00:10:50,990
Just being miserable towards everybody
who's younger than you and still in
192
00:10:50,990 --> 00:10:52,290
prime? Wow.
193
00:10:52,870 --> 00:10:54,370
At least I can drive.
194
00:10:54,810 --> 00:10:55,930
And wear a bra.
195
00:10:56,690 --> 00:11:01,910
And these girls? Oh, they are still way
in their prime, thank you very much.
196
00:11:09,050 --> 00:11:10,570
Adam. I already did it, Mom.
197
00:11:10,890 --> 00:11:11,749
What? What?
198
00:11:11,750 --> 00:11:12,950
Yes. No.
199
00:11:13,729 --> 00:11:15,030
18. What was the question?
200
00:11:15,230 --> 00:11:18,750
I didn't ask you a question. Are you
sure? Yeah. I thought you didn't. Okay.
201
00:11:20,070 --> 00:11:25,050
Look, please tell me you haven't touched
her.
202
00:11:26,450 --> 00:11:28,230
No, I haven't touched her.
203
00:11:28,930 --> 00:11:30,470
You know I'm bad at that stuff.
204
00:11:31,710 --> 00:11:33,310
Well, thank God for that.
205
00:11:34,450 --> 00:11:35,810
Oh, great.
206
00:11:36,590 --> 00:11:37,770
You're still here.
207
00:11:38,470 --> 00:11:39,470
Hey, everybody.
208
00:11:39,790 --> 00:11:41,990
Bartender just changed shift. He's going
to need IDs from everybody.
209
00:11:42,230 --> 00:11:43,230
Okay.
210
00:11:47,370 --> 00:11:48,089
Thank you.
211
00:11:48,090 --> 00:11:49,090
Thank you, my love.
212
00:11:49,210 --> 00:11:51,010
Space said you're all set there,
Goldion.
213
00:12:00,670 --> 00:12:01,670
What?
214
00:12:02,370 --> 00:12:05,570
Do you remember that really awful horror
movie you made me go see with you?
215
00:12:06,350 --> 00:12:07,350
Orphan?
216
00:12:08,110 --> 00:12:09,350
That. Okay.
217
00:12:10,670 --> 00:12:13,890
I was skeptical of Bailey's age at
first, too. I was. So I did one of those
218
00:12:13,890 --> 00:12:16,510
things where you're like, let's compare
ID photos, you know, so you can see the
219
00:12:16,510 --> 00:12:17,510
other person's birthday.
220
00:12:17,710 --> 00:12:18,710
She's 21.
221
00:12:19,390 --> 00:12:20,390
She's not.
222
00:12:20,590 --> 00:12:21,590
She is.
223
00:12:21,810 --> 00:12:22,930
Go like this.
224
00:12:24,590 --> 00:12:27,470
What is it? I don't know.
225
00:12:27,910 --> 00:12:29,430
Go. Well, get it. Stop.
226
00:12:32,030 --> 00:12:33,030
What was it?
227
00:12:33,550 --> 00:12:34,690
Cat hair.
228
00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:36,130
Axel.
229
00:12:36,330 --> 00:12:37,330
My voice.
230
00:12:37,350 --> 00:12:38,350
Okay.
231
00:12:41,520 --> 00:12:42,520
What'd you wish for?
232
00:12:42,580 --> 00:12:43,580
I'm not telling.
233
00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:45,060
You can tell me. No way.
234
00:12:45,260 --> 00:12:46,300
Why not? You can tell me.
235
00:12:47,140 --> 00:12:48,140
What if you're in it?
236
00:12:48,660 --> 00:12:49,660
Am I in it?
237
00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:51,060
I'm not telling.
238
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:55,580
Just because she's young does not mean
that she's a child. I can't believe
239
00:12:55,580 --> 00:12:56,580
you're this stupid.
240
00:12:58,160 --> 00:12:59,160
Oh, hey, guys.
241
00:12:59,540 --> 00:13:00,540
Hey, guys.
242
00:13:01,560 --> 00:13:02,560
Hey, guys.
243
00:13:04,020 --> 00:13:05,340
I'm going to go throw up now.
244
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,620
Corey, stop.
245
00:13:10,140 --> 00:13:11,140
Corey.
246
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:17,240
Let me go talk to her. I think we got
off on the wrong foot, Steve.
247
00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:18,880
Yeah, okay.
248
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:21,500
Hey, hey!
249
00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:23,120
I'm still knocking?
250
00:13:23,700 --> 00:13:25,060
Jeez, it's okay.
251
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:26,780
I have a la -la, too.
252
00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:32,920
Besides, when my last two exes moved on,
I was depressed for weeks. You haven't
253
00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:35,400
even been walking long enough to
possibly have two exes.
254
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:38,240
Oh.
255
00:13:38,900 --> 00:13:40,140
Let's try this again.
256
00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:42,360
Look, sweetie, I know you're at a
difficult age.
257
00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:49,240
I know you're on to me. So here's the
deal.
258
00:13:49,780 --> 00:13:55,380
You're not going to say another word and
you're going to walk away.
259
00:13:58,140 --> 00:14:03,960
I'm going to slit you open from your
throat to
260
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:06,740
your belly button.
261
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,960
Are we?
262
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:22,080
We can be friends and play nice, Cory.
263
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:28,640
Oh, and by the way, you should really
use some Dermalogica cream for those
264
00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:29,640
wrinkles.
265
00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:33,600
Thanks, Dermalogica.
266
00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:35,880
What
267
00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:44,620
are
268
00:14:44,620 --> 00:14:45,620
you reading?
269
00:14:45,640 --> 00:14:46,700
Your journal.
270
00:14:47,470 --> 00:14:48,830
Those are my private thoughts.
271
00:14:49,090 --> 00:14:55,510
Yeah, March 31st. Why did Subway get rid
of the seafood and lobster
272
00:14:55,510 --> 00:15:00,730
sandwich? At first, I thought they'd at
least bring it back in the summertime.
273
00:15:01,390 --> 00:15:03,130
But they didn't.
274
00:15:03,390 --> 00:15:07,890
Sometimes I wonder why I go on, but I
just do.
275
00:15:08,370 --> 00:15:10,470
I just do.
276
00:15:11,590 --> 00:15:14,670
Man, this is some deep shit.
277
00:15:18,890 --> 00:15:21,790
If I'm going to be living in a guy's
closet, I at least deserve to know
278
00:15:21,790 --> 00:15:25,370
everything about him. Don't ever read my
journal again.
279
00:15:25,730 --> 00:15:26,730
Sorry.
280
00:15:27,170 --> 00:15:30,030
What kind of grown man keeps a journal
anyway?
281
00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:33,510
Might as well have a pet hamster.
282
00:15:35,290 --> 00:15:37,010
We did that joke last season.
283
00:15:37,290 --> 00:15:38,290
We did?
284
00:15:38,530 --> 00:15:42,190
Yeah. Remember Horace Pinker, the
hamster and the ball?
285
00:15:42,490 --> 00:15:44,090
I only watched my thing.
286
00:15:44,630 --> 00:15:46,010
What's this really about?
287
00:15:46,210 --> 00:15:47,570
You seem stressed.
288
00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:49,680
It's my new girlfriend, Bailey.
289
00:15:50,060 --> 00:15:51,060
Ever.
290
00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:56,640
Well, I guess she and Corey got into a
fight last week, and now Corey's like
291
00:15:56,640 --> 00:16:01,080
MIA. Adam, you can always make a new
best friend.
292
00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:03,420
It's like I always say.
293
00:16:03,720 --> 00:16:04,720
Last season.
294
00:16:05,260 --> 00:16:08,460
Really? You gave me that speech last
season.
295
00:16:08,780 --> 00:16:12,940
Well, I'm becoming rather one note,
aren't I?
296
00:16:13,460 --> 00:16:14,460
Yeah.
297
00:16:15,060 --> 00:16:18,220
Well, what... What about if I do this?
298
00:16:21,120 --> 00:16:22,120
Whoa.
299
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:23,980
You can do that?
300
00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:26,980
Want to have sex with me?
301
00:16:28,140 --> 00:16:29,140
I'll pass.
302
00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:33,760
Look, you can't choose who you love.
303
00:16:34,120 --> 00:16:37,000
It's like Odorous Yerungus always says.
304
00:16:37,260 --> 00:16:43,600
If your friends won't accept the one
that you love, then pour Drano down
305
00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:48,930
throats. so you'll never have to listen
to anything they have to say ever again.
306
00:16:53,790 --> 00:17:00,350
Look, there's no easy way to say this,
so I'm just going to be blunt. Are you
307
00:17:00,350 --> 00:17:01,350
breaking up with me?
308
00:17:01,970 --> 00:17:05,670
Holy quidditch, Harry Potter!
309
00:17:06,349 --> 00:17:08,230
No, no, not at all.
310
00:17:09,270 --> 00:17:10,849
Oh, you make me LOL.
311
00:17:14,349 --> 00:17:18,530
In fact, I'm trying to tell you that I
like you.
312
00:17:19,369 --> 00:17:20,369
I like you.
313
00:17:20,530 --> 00:17:21,530
Well, thank you.
314
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:29,530
And, well, I think it's time that we
take our relationship to the
315
00:17:29,530 --> 00:17:30,530
next level.
316
00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:32,990
Oh. Yeah.
317
00:17:33,770 --> 00:17:36,010
But first, I need to know.
318
00:17:38,330 --> 00:17:42,350
Are you over, um... Corey?
319
00:17:46,100 --> 00:17:47,140
Corey? Yeah.
320
00:17:47,420 --> 00:17:48,420
Are you kidding?
321
00:17:48,540 --> 00:17:49,540
No.
322
00:17:49,620 --> 00:17:51,620
It's like, you, Corey.
323
00:17:52,660 --> 00:17:53,660
Okay.
324
00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:59,020
You will never, ever have to hear about
her again.
325
00:18:01,060 --> 00:18:02,560
That's her. Right there.
326
00:18:02,980 --> 00:18:08,540
Oh, my God. What the hell is going on
here? Hold on. We'll ask the questions.
327
00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,880
What the hell is going on here?
328
00:18:12,780 --> 00:18:14,300
Is he making fun of me?
329
00:18:14,990 --> 00:18:15,990
That girl is underage.
330
00:18:16,150 --> 00:18:18,010
She's pretending to be older than she
is.
331
00:18:18,210 --> 00:18:19,250
No, I'm not.
332
00:18:19,630 --> 00:18:20,630
All right, all right, stop.
333
00:18:20,730 --> 00:18:21,830
Let's see some ID, young lady.
334
00:18:22,070 --> 00:18:23,070
Of course.
335
00:18:27,550 --> 00:18:28,550
Officer?
336
00:18:32,430 --> 00:18:33,430
Checked out.
337
00:18:33,990 --> 00:18:35,770
Thanks, coach, for me, Miss Morgan.
338
00:18:36,170 --> 00:18:38,090
Thank you. Wait, are you kidding me?
339
00:18:38,350 --> 00:18:40,610
This little girl is crazy town.
340
00:18:40,830 --> 00:18:43,950
She pulled a knife on me, and she's
setting him up to go to jail for
341
00:18:43,950 --> 00:18:44,950
rape. Whoa.
342
00:18:45,550 --> 00:18:47,210
That's a serious allegation.
343
00:18:47,970 --> 00:18:50,750
Rape is very bad and not funny.
344
00:18:50,990 --> 00:18:53,590
If you rape, you ain't great.
345
00:18:54,890 --> 00:18:58,690
Officers, I have never seen this Joan
Rivers look like in my life.
346
00:19:00,190 --> 00:19:06,650
Corey, why don't you do all of us a
favor and get the hell out?
347
00:19:07,570 --> 00:19:08,570
See ya.
348
00:19:08,630 --> 00:19:09,790
Bye -bye. Wait.
349
00:19:10,770 --> 00:19:11,950
Wait, she's not underage?
350
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:15,340
Hey, Bailey. Mm -hmm?
351
00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:17,860
New Kids on the Block sucks.
352
00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:20,320
Tis that.
353
00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:24,740
Hey, but I'm just a fan that's not 20
years old.
354
00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:26,960
Hey, Bailey. Mm -hmm?
355
00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:28,660
One Direction sucks.
356
00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:55,700
White people be crazy.
357
00:20:01,540 --> 00:20:02,540
Woo -hoo!
358
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:07,720
Corey. I know.
359
00:20:08,100 --> 00:20:10,700
No. You don't even have to say anything.
I know you're sorry.
360
00:20:12,620 --> 00:20:16,500
No, I was going to say... Matlock is on.
361
00:20:22,350 --> 00:20:23,350
Good evening, Holliston.
362
00:20:23,850 --> 00:20:24,850
Hey, boss.
363
00:20:25,210 --> 00:20:26,049
Where's Dean?
364
00:20:26,050 --> 00:20:27,510
He went home to live with his mother.
365
00:20:28,550 --> 00:20:33,470
Once he found out I was broke and about
to lose my job, I guess he just didn't
366
00:20:33,470 --> 00:20:34,510
need me in his life anymore.
367
00:20:35,270 --> 00:20:38,330
And we were going to start a Skid Row
tribute band and everything.
368
00:20:40,290 --> 00:20:42,710
I guess Youth Gone Wild just wasn't
meant to be.
369
00:20:43,350 --> 00:20:48,690
Well, speaking of Youth Gone Wild, I
found out that my girlfriend, Bailey,
370
00:20:49,420 --> 00:20:52,120
She was only 11 years old and a wanted
sociopath.
371
00:20:52,980 --> 00:20:58,420
Apparently, what she does is she lures
older men into sleeping with her, and
372
00:20:58,420 --> 00:21:01,600
then she threatens to blackmail them by
saying she's going to go to the
373
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:04,960
authorities unless the dude will perform
grisly murders for her.
374
00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:10,640
Adam, did you not hear me? A skid row
tribute band.
375
00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:12,040
It would have been awesome.
376
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:14,220
I'm sorry your son left you, Lance.
377
00:21:15,720 --> 00:21:17,540
Having children is for old people.
378
00:21:19,020 --> 00:21:20,680
I'm only 23 years old.
379
00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:27,900
This rocket was meant to rock it until
every head is banging and every chick is
380
00:21:27,900 --> 00:21:28,900
slapped.
381
00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:31,100
No kids for this legend.
382
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:32,440
No way.
383
00:21:32,740 --> 00:21:33,740
Not ever.
384
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:38,780
I'm looking for a guy named Tonto
DeWitt. Long building, douchebag.
385
00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:41,100
Man, if I don't get his bone marrow, I'm
gonna die.
386
00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:50,300
We got good.
387
00:21:51,660 --> 00:21:56,740
If you don't believe us, we can make it.
388
00:21:59,180 --> 00:22:00,800
But nothing can stop.
26396
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