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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,194 --> 00:00:04,265 - We've constructed a paradise here... 2 00:00:04,266 --> 00:00:06,992 but the world is still the world. 3 00:00:06,993 --> 00:00:08,752 - Defib! - I don't have a pulse. 4 00:00:08,753 --> 00:00:11,341 - Max. He's gone. 5 00:00:11,342 --> 00:00:13,999 - I spoke to the captain, and if you wanted. 6 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,828 if you decided that you would like to be an M.D., 7 00:00:15,829 --> 00:00:18,245 he will support you for a full scholarship. 8 00:00:20,317 --> 00:00:22,007 - It was never real. 9 00:00:22,008 --> 00:00:24,285 I was never in love with Avery to begin with. 10 00:00:24,286 --> 00:00:27,944 - I think I just heard you give me your inherent blessing. 11 00:00:27,945 --> 00:00:29,152 Is it a bad idea? 12 00:00:29,153 --> 00:00:31,224 - Sleeping with a subordinate? 13 00:00:32,122 --> 00:00:34,985 - Alright, you scallywags. 14 00:00:34,986 --> 00:00:38,128 The heat's on. Bets are in. Let's draw. 15 00:00:39,543 --> 00:00:41,992 - If this were Settlers of Catan, 16 00:00:41,993 --> 00:00:44,202 I'm telling you... whole different story. 17 00:00:44,203 --> 00:00:45,479 - Mm-hmm. 18 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:46,721 - I'll trade two. 19 00:00:46,722 --> 00:00:48,102 - Two please, Cap. 20 00:00:48,103 --> 00:00:50,000 - So, we all jazzed for "Welles-ness Week" 21 00:00:50,001 --> 00:00:51,416 with Bethany Welles? 22 00:00:51,417 --> 00:00:53,418 I had to Zoom with her two weeks ago. 23 00:00:53,419 --> 00:00:55,282 Bethany asked me, the head of housekeeping, 24 00:00:55,283 --> 00:00:56,938 to personally wash all the linens 25 00:00:56,939 --> 00:00:58,285 in her own special detergent 26 00:00:58,286 --> 00:01:00,459 made from pickled cucumber brine. 27 00:01:00,460 --> 00:01:02,944 - Aren't pickled cucumbers just pickles? 28 00:01:02,945 --> 00:01:04,567 - This woman is a wellness celebrity. 29 00:01:04,568 --> 00:01:06,431 She has no idea about what we do, 30 00:01:06,432 --> 00:01:09,641 and yet, for a week, we give her the keys to the kingdom. 31 00:01:09,642 --> 00:01:11,884 It's like putting a toddler behind a Mack truck 32 00:01:11,885 --> 00:01:13,748 and saying, "Happy trails." 33 00:01:13,749 --> 00:01:16,717 - Why on Earth would we give this woman that much power? 34 00:01:16,718 --> 00:01:19,306 - Oh, naive little Dr. Odyssey. 35 00:01:19,307 --> 00:01:22,550 There are exactly 10.2 million reasons why. 36 00:01:22,551 --> 00:01:24,276 - Instagram followers. 37 00:01:24,277 --> 00:01:27,452 - Her company sponsors this Wellness Week. 38 00:01:27,453 --> 00:01:30,765 And it's a very public, very big deal, 39 00:01:30,766 --> 00:01:33,251 so we kind of have a little balancing act here. 40 00:01:33,252 --> 00:01:38,118 We do our jobs while simultaneously tolerating 41 00:01:38,119 --> 00:01:40,741 Bethany's wackadoodle quirks. 42 00:01:40,742 --> 00:01:43,399 - Last year, she tried to get me to use corn ethanol 43 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:44,745 to power the ship. 44 00:01:44,746 --> 00:01:46,160 Corn. 45 00:01:46,161 --> 00:01:48,921 I tell you, this whole, uh, "global warming" crap 46 00:01:48,922 --> 00:01:50,854 is just so overblown. 47 00:01:50,855 --> 00:01:53,340 - Global warming is overblown? 48 00:01:53,341 --> 00:01:54,927 Just this week, we'll re-routing around 49 00:01:54,928 --> 00:01:57,240 a major tropical depression off the coast of Baja. 50 00:01:57,241 --> 00:01:58,793 Tell me, when have we ever had tropical depressions 51 00:01:58,794 --> 00:02:00,174 in this time of year? - Well, if the Earth's 52 00:02:00,175 --> 00:02:02,211 getting so hot, then you just explain to me 53 00:02:02,212 --> 00:02:04,178 why there was 8 feet of flipping snow last Christmas 54 00:02:04,179 --> 00:02:06,974 in my hometown of Dowagiac, Michigan. 55 00:02:06,975 --> 00:02:10,253 - Rosie, I'm gonna tell you, you're the best damn engineer 56 00:02:10,254 --> 00:02:12,255 that a captain could ever ask for 57 00:02:12,256 --> 00:02:16,156 and nobody knows this Odyssey better than you, 58 00:02:16,157 --> 00:02:18,848 but on this point, you're dead wrong. 59 00:02:18,849 --> 00:02:21,126 I've been on the seas for the better part of my life 60 00:02:21,127 --> 00:02:24,578 and sailed every ocean in every condition. 61 00:02:24,579 --> 00:02:26,580 And I can tell ya, 62 00:02:26,581 --> 00:02:29,790 from my experience, this isn't right. 63 00:02:29,791 --> 00:02:31,688 These storms are stronger 64 00:02:31,689 --> 00:02:35,452 and the hurricane seasons last months longer than they used to. 65 00:02:36,660 --> 00:02:38,419 But speaking of disasters, 66 00:02:38,420 --> 00:02:41,181 it's time for the rest of you fools to lose your clothing. 67 00:02:41,182 --> 00:02:42,872 - Ah. - Good. 68 00:02:42,873 --> 00:02:45,046 - Who's still in? - I'm out like Ellen. 69 00:02:45,047 --> 00:02:48,015 Ooh. 70 00:02:48,016 --> 00:02:49,292 Ohh! 71 00:02:49,293 --> 00:02:53,262 - Rosie, you can smell that thing in Buenaventura. 72 00:02:53,263 --> 00:02:57,336 - Uh, yeah. I'm out, Cap. You got me, too. 73 00:02:58,337 --> 00:03:00,407 - Fold, but... 74 00:03:00,408 --> 00:03:02,823 Well, joke's on you. 75 00:03:02,824 --> 00:03:04,100 I'm an exhibitionist. 76 00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:06,378 - Ha ha ah! There he is! 77 00:03:06,379 --> 00:03:08,518 - Well, look, first I want to just say 78 00:03:08,519 --> 00:03:09,795 thank you for inviting me 79 00:03:09,796 --> 00:03:11,487 to the Boys and Butches card game. 80 00:03:11,488 --> 00:03:12,660 - And "Bi's." 81 00:03:12,661 --> 00:03:14,352 - Sorry. Boys, Butches, and Bi's. 82 00:03:14,353 --> 00:03:17,769 And in that spirit of inclusion, I would like to say... 83 00:03:17,770 --> 00:03:19,426 I'm in. 84 00:03:19,427 --> 00:03:20,599 - Really? 85 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,568 - Really. - Okay. 86 00:03:23,983 --> 00:03:24,983 Three cowboys. 87 00:03:26,054 --> 00:03:28,400 Ooh! 88 00:03:28,401 --> 00:03:30,989 -"How rude" is the catchphrase 89 00:03:30,990 --> 00:03:33,474 of Stephanie Tanner on my favorite sitcom... 90 00:03:33,475 --> 00:03:36,132 - Oh, no. - Oh! Come on. 91 00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:37,754 Come on! - ..."Full House." 92 00:03:40,586 --> 00:03:42,277 Okay. 93 00:03:43,692 --> 00:03:45,831 Oh. 94 00:03:45,832 --> 00:03:48,731 - Hey! - Okay. There we go! 95 00:03:48,732 --> 00:03:50,215 - Why not the... 96 00:03:50,216 --> 00:03:52,079 - The hat always stays on. 97 00:03:53,978 --> 00:03:56,083 Well, that's game for me. 98 00:03:56,084 --> 00:03:57,912 Remember-- this week, chins up. 99 00:03:57,913 --> 00:04:00,225 We can navigate around any rough waters, 100 00:04:00,226 --> 00:04:04,125 and we can navigate around the peculiarities of Bethany Welles. 101 00:04:04,126 --> 00:04:05,989 So no tropical depressions, 102 00:04:05,990 --> 00:04:10,200 either atmospheric or emotional, are gonna darken our days. 103 00:04:10,201 --> 00:04:12,755 I forecast smiles 104 00:04:12,756 --> 00:04:16,552 and smooth sailing and sunny skies! 105 00:04:16,553 --> 00:04:18,139 Good night, y'all. 106 00:04:18,140 --> 00:04:19,935 - Night, Cap. - Night, Cap. 107 00:04:30,567 --> 00:04:32,499 - Are we still on course? 108 00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:34,535 - Barely maintaining. 109 00:04:34,536 --> 00:04:38,263 - Alright, team. We're entering the first trough. 110 00:04:40,508 --> 00:04:43,511 Alright. Brace for impact. - Brace! 111 00:04:55,385 --> 00:04:59,180 - So I got a letter yesterday, and, uh... 112 00:04:59,181 --> 00:05:02,218 Well, uh, I got it. 113 00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:04,185 I got the scholarship. 114 00:05:04,186 --> 00:05:06,395 Yeah. - That's amazing! 115 00:05:06,396 --> 00:05:08,155 - Thank you! Oh, congratulations! 116 00:05:08,156 --> 00:05:09,984 - Thanks. Thanks. 117 00:05:09,985 --> 00:05:11,641 - You're gonna be a doctor. 118 00:05:11,642 --> 00:05:13,471 You're going to med school. You're leaving. 119 00:05:13,472 --> 00:05:15,127 - Y-Yeah. Yeah. I guess so. - Wow. 120 00:05:15,128 --> 00:05:16,646 - Yeah. - Man, I'm so happy for you. 121 00:05:16,647 --> 00:05:17,992 That's-- That's great. - Thank you. 122 00:05:17,993 --> 00:05:19,269 - That is great. - Thank you so much. 123 00:05:19,270 --> 00:05:20,996 - Yeah. 124 00:05:24,034 --> 00:05:25,379 Hey. Should we-- - Do you want to-- 125 00:05:25,380 --> 00:05:27,657 - Well, I just wanted to check in and make sure 126 00:05:27,658 --> 00:05:29,210 if you wanted to talk about what happened, but... 127 00:05:29,211 --> 00:05:31,074 - Uh, I mean, I don't have to talk about what happened. 128 00:05:31,075 --> 00:05:32,593 Do you want to talk about what happened? - Oh. No, no. 129 00:05:32,594 --> 00:05:34,043 Then I-- No, no, no. I'm good. If you're good, I'm good. 130 00:05:34,044 --> 00:05:35,147 - We're great. - Okay. We're good. 131 00:05:35,148 --> 00:05:37,460 - Yeah. That's good. - Yeah. Good. 132 00:05:40,153 --> 00:05:43,086 Well, congratulations. I-I'm really happy for you. 133 00:06:01,105 --> 00:06:03,590 Oh, my God. Oh, my God! 134 00:06:03,591 --> 00:06:05,039 That's Agnes Simkin! 135 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:06,696 She's an acupuncturist and a psychic. 136 00:06:06,697 --> 00:06:08,180 She's helped thousands of people 137 00:06:08,181 --> 00:06:09,423 diagnose chronic conditions. 138 00:06:09,424 --> 00:06:11,770 - Unbelievable. Why rely on the scientific method 139 00:06:11,771 --> 00:06:13,945 when you can just read your patient's palm? 140 00:06:13,946 --> 00:06:15,429 - You both really think 141 00:06:15,430 --> 00:06:17,155 Western medicine has everything figured out? 142 00:06:17,156 --> 00:06:18,708 - Well, all I know is that when I get sick, 143 00:06:18,709 --> 00:06:21,884 I go to a doctor for some pills, not a witch for some toadstools. 144 00:06:23,438 --> 00:06:24,956 - Taxus brevifolia. 145 00:06:24,957 --> 00:06:26,958 A.k.a. the Pacific yew tree. 146 00:06:26,959 --> 00:06:29,512 Its bark contains paclitaxel, better known as Taxol, 147 00:06:29,513 --> 00:06:30,962 the life-saving chemotherapy drug. 148 00:06:30,963 --> 00:06:32,722 Practitioners were called crazy when they first started 149 00:06:32,723 --> 00:06:35,484 using it as a cancer treatment. - Yeah, but maybe for this week, 150 00:06:35,485 --> 00:06:38,107 we don't use that word-- "crazy." 151 00:06:56,402 --> 00:06:59,128 - Mi Capitàn! Buenos dias! 152 00:06:59,129 --> 00:07:00,819 Muy bueno to be back! 153 00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:02,959 Bienvenida, Bethany. 154 00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:04,236 Todo es bien. 155 00:07:04,237 --> 00:07:06,238 Look at those sapphire eyes. 156 00:07:06,239 --> 00:07:09,172 Oh! You're just so handsome! I came bearing gifts. 157 00:07:09,173 --> 00:07:10,967 - That's so nice. - And you get a prize. 158 00:07:10,968 --> 00:07:13,142 - Thank you. - And you get a prize. 159 00:07:13,143 --> 00:07:14,315 And you get a prize. - Thank you. 160 00:07:14,316 --> 00:07:15,593 - Captain! - And, Captain... 161 00:07:15,594 --> 00:07:18,320 - Uh-- Oh. I'm sorry. Excuse me one second. 162 00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:22,634 Do you know what this is?! 163 00:07:22,635 --> 00:07:25,016 Ozone therapy. 164 00:07:25,017 --> 00:07:27,087 - Where does that tube go? 165 00:07:27,088 --> 00:07:28,951 - It's a rectal application. 166 00:07:28,952 --> 00:07:31,367 Wellness culture. It's my agony. It's my ecstasy. 167 00:07:31,368 --> 00:07:32,644 Sue me. 168 00:07:32,645 --> 00:07:35,785 - Avery! Oh, my radiant daughter! 169 00:07:35,786 --> 00:07:37,684 Look at you! 170 00:07:37,685 --> 00:07:40,065 - You know, it's time to cut that thing out of your life. 171 00:07:40,066 --> 00:07:41,791 And I know you know what I'm talking about. 172 00:07:41,792 --> 00:07:43,448 - Yes, yes. 173 00:07:43,449 --> 00:07:47,107 - We'll talk later about it. You must be the doctor! 174 00:07:47,108 --> 00:07:49,350 Oh. Oh. Your aura. 175 00:07:49,351 --> 00:07:52,422 It's a crimson, bloody shadow! 176 00:07:52,423 --> 00:07:53,769 - Hi. Hi. - Huh? 177 00:07:53,770 --> 00:07:55,253 - Sorry. - Ohh. 178 00:07:55,254 --> 00:07:57,842 - Hi. I'm Kathy. I came all they way from Cedar Rapids. 179 00:07:57,843 --> 00:08:00,741 I can't believe it's really you! I'm crying! 180 00:08:00,742 --> 00:08:03,019 Oh, bless you. 181 00:08:03,020 --> 00:08:07,576 May our tears, as carriers of truth, flow ceaselessly. 182 00:08:07,577 --> 00:08:10,544 - Can I get a selfie? - You better post it. Right? 183 00:08:10,545 --> 00:08:11,959 Okay. 184 00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:14,444 Rowan! Rapido! 185 00:08:15,723 --> 00:08:17,068 - Tag B. Welles Health and Beauty 186 00:08:17,069 --> 00:08:18,966 for 10% off at our onboard store. 187 00:08:45,235 --> 00:08:49,445 - Ah! The ship has called to me like a great spirit beckoning. 188 00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:52,482 - May she nestle you securely in her mighty bosom. 189 00:08:52,483 --> 00:08:53,794 - Oh. Ohh! 190 00:08:53,795 --> 00:08:55,589 Everyone, I'd like you to meet 191 00:08:55,590 --> 00:08:57,971 my dear, dear friend, Vivian Montgomery, 192 00:08:57,972 --> 00:09:01,008 whom you may recognize if you own a television. 193 00:09:01,009 --> 00:09:03,286 That's right. Viv is a two-time winner 194 00:09:03,287 --> 00:09:05,185 of "Red-Hot Chef," 195 00:09:05,186 --> 00:09:08,119 and she will be overseeing our cuisine this week. 196 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:10,949 Oh, her liver carpaccio is to die for! 197 00:09:10,950 --> 00:09:14,228 - Personal chef to a bunch of smoothie drinkers. 198 00:09:14,229 --> 00:09:15,782 Sweet gig. 199 00:09:15,783 --> 00:09:18,579 - Coming from a candy striper on a cruise ship? 200 00:09:19,269 --> 00:09:22,098 Um, Bethany, what's all this? 201 00:09:22,099 --> 00:09:24,618 - Oh, did I forget to tell you? Oops. 202 00:09:24,619 --> 00:09:27,379 Might I wrangle the doctor for just a squeak? 203 00:09:27,380 --> 00:09:30,210 I just have some tiny micro details to go over 204 00:09:30,211 --> 00:09:32,730 just for pesky insurance purposes. 205 00:09:32,731 --> 00:09:35,940 - Wrangle away. - You're the best. 206 00:09:35,941 --> 00:09:38,114 My lawyers, the nervous ninnies, 207 00:09:38,115 --> 00:09:40,841 demanded a doctor sign off on some of my cuisine choices. 208 00:09:40,842 --> 00:09:43,085 You know, liability, yada yada yada. 209 00:09:43,086 --> 00:09:44,673 You know, I've been on this incredible diet 210 00:09:44,674 --> 00:09:46,744 for the past six months and I've never felt better. 211 00:09:46,745 --> 00:09:49,229 Viv, tell him all about it! 212 00:09:49,230 --> 00:09:52,025 - It's organ meats, nature's multivitamin. 213 00:09:52,026 --> 00:09:55,338 They're rich in iron, copper, vitamins A, B. 214 00:09:55,339 --> 00:09:57,927 Low in cholesterol and full of protein. 215 00:09:57,928 --> 00:09:59,411 Here. Try it. 216 00:09:59,412 --> 00:10:00,965 This is goat liver. 217 00:10:00,966 --> 00:10:03,623 The flavor is smooth, delicate, and it's easily digestible. 218 00:10:03,624 --> 00:10:05,452 - Are you asking me to eat that? 219 00:10:05,453 --> 00:10:08,213 - Obviously. - No. 220 00:10:08,214 --> 00:10:11,285 Raw meat is filled with bacteria, pathogens, parasites. 221 00:10:11,286 --> 00:10:13,529 Why don't we cook it first? - No You'll ruin it 222 00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:15,531 That's the food of our ancestors. 223 00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:18,396 You know, they didn't have expensive flambé pans 224 00:10:18,397 --> 00:10:21,123 or fancy polyurethane sous vide bags. 225 00:10:21,124 --> 00:10:22,676 No, they took a raw bite, 226 00:10:22,677 --> 00:10:24,126 they chewed, they swallowed, and they thrived. 227 00:10:24,127 --> 00:10:25,852 - And they lived to the ripe old age of 22. 228 00:10:25,853 --> 00:10:28,958 - You eat sushi, right? What's the difference? 229 00:10:28,959 --> 00:10:32,306 Come on, Doc. What are you afraid of? 230 00:10:32,307 --> 00:10:33,791 - I'll eat it. 231 00:10:33,792 --> 00:10:35,309 - Tristan. So nice of you to join us. 232 00:10:35,310 --> 00:10:38,347 Sh-- Happy to help. 233 00:10:38,348 --> 00:10:41,039 Wow. That looks... 234 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,835 looks lovely. 235 00:10:43,733 --> 00:10:45,009 - Thank you. - Mmm. 236 00:10:45,010 --> 00:10:46,907 - See? Nothing to be afraid of. 237 00:10:46,908 --> 00:10:49,323 I'm having Vivian include a special course 238 00:10:49,324 --> 00:10:51,429 with tonight's dinner-- with your go-ahead, Doctor. 239 00:10:51,430 --> 00:10:54,295 - I don't see the harm. What say you, Doc? 240 00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:57,849 - Sure, but I want a member of my team 241 00:10:57,850 --> 00:10:59,540 to oversee the food-prep process. 242 00:10:59,541 --> 00:11:01,473 I don't want there to be any cross-contamination. 243 00:11:01,474 --> 00:11:03,268 Tristan, you seem to have taken a keen interest. 244 00:11:03,269 --> 00:11:06,202 - Oh, yeah. Whatever you say. 245 00:11:06,203 --> 00:11:08,342 - You hear that? 246 00:11:08,343 --> 00:11:10,104 You're mine. 247 00:11:12,244 --> 00:11:13,727 - Dearie me. 248 00:11:18,422 --> 00:11:19,629 - How y'all doing? 249 00:11:19,630 --> 00:11:21,942 I'm Judy Riva the Smoothie Diva, 250 00:11:21,943 --> 00:11:24,945 and I'm joined today by healer extraordinaire 251 00:11:24,946 --> 00:11:26,222 Agnes Simkin! 252 00:11:27,846 --> 00:11:30,813 Now, organic ingredients mixed properly-- 253 00:11:30,814 --> 00:11:32,642 this is nature's medicine. - Hm. 254 00:11:32,643 --> 00:11:36,060 - So I put all the good stuff in one powder-- DivaDust. 255 00:11:36,061 --> 00:11:37,993 Now, this is my proprietary blend 256 00:11:37,994 --> 00:11:42,135 of superfoods, minerals, and pre- and probiotics. 257 00:11:42,136 --> 00:11:44,102 - Hm. What's in it? She won't tell me. 258 00:11:44,103 --> 00:11:45,103 She never has. 259 00:11:46,174 --> 00:11:47,934 - Well, I can't tell you. 260 00:11:47,935 --> 00:11:49,487 If I tell you that, my lawyers 261 00:11:49,488 --> 00:11:51,144 will have you walk the gangplank. 262 00:11:51,145 --> 00:11:53,387 - I have a crazy legal team, as well. Hm. 263 00:11:53,388 --> 00:11:56,425 - What I can tell you is that this mixture 264 00:11:56,426 --> 00:11:59,083 literally erased my son's dyslexia. 265 00:11:59,084 --> 00:12:02,880 And for me, it cured a terrible case of chronic hiccups. 266 00:12:02,881 --> 00:12:05,399 Uh, you know, three years ago, 267 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,367 Judy came to me and she said, "Eat my dust," 268 00:12:07,368 --> 00:12:09,334 in that very brash tone of hers. 269 00:12:09,335 --> 00:12:11,751 Um, but I have to say, I'm so glad that I did, really. 270 00:12:11,752 --> 00:12:14,374 Because I start every morning with a DivaDust smoothie. 271 00:12:14,375 --> 00:12:16,376 And I know it's hard to tell in this tunic, 272 00:12:16,377 --> 00:12:17,860 but I'm quite thin. 273 00:12:17,861 --> 00:12:20,069 So the proof is in the pudding, as they say. 274 00:12:20,070 --> 00:12:22,486 - Yes. The proof is in the dust. 275 00:12:23,625 --> 00:12:25,385 I have, along with DivaDust, 276 00:12:25,386 --> 00:12:27,352 a couple of incredible ingredients 277 00:12:27,353 --> 00:12:29,803 which are not even legal in the U.S. 278 00:12:29,804 --> 00:12:32,806 - Ooh. - Um, including bitter almonds. 279 00:12:32,807 --> 00:12:34,670 These guys have twice the nutrients 280 00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:36,534 and way more flavor 281 00:12:36,535 --> 00:12:39,675 than the regular old ones at the supermarket. 282 00:12:49,237 --> 00:12:51,031 - Excuse me. Can we get a picture with you? 283 00:12:51,032 --> 00:12:53,033 - Oh. Of course, my loves. 284 00:12:54,829 --> 00:12:57,935 - Uh, Miss Simkin? Hi. Um, I'm Avery. 285 00:12:57,936 --> 00:12:59,660 I'm a nurse here on the Odyssey, 286 00:12:59,661 --> 00:13:03,423 and I just wanted to say I'm a huge fan. 287 00:13:03,424 --> 00:13:06,253 - It's a shame to see such a young and promising woman 288 00:13:06,254 --> 00:13:08,118 working for the enemy. 289 00:13:08,878 --> 00:13:10,568 Hm. Big Pharma? 290 00:13:10,569 --> 00:13:12,432 The sickness industrial complex? 291 00:13:12,433 --> 00:13:14,675 Doctors and nurses, like yourself, 292 00:13:14,676 --> 00:13:17,195 have a vested interest in keeping people sick. 293 00:13:17,196 --> 00:13:19,853 True wellness comes from within, not without. 294 00:13:19,854 --> 00:13:23,961 - Um, I-I don't-- I don't think that's fair at all, actually. 295 00:13:23,962 --> 00:13:28,206 I-I swore an oath to help people 296 00:13:28,207 --> 00:13:30,588 that I take very seriously. 297 00:13:30,589 --> 00:13:32,176 A-Are you-- 298 00:13:32,177 --> 00:13:34,488 Uh, are you okay? 299 00:13:34,489 --> 00:13:35,904 - Huh. 300 00:13:35,905 --> 00:13:37,802 I'm fine, sweetie. I'm an empath. 301 00:13:37,803 --> 00:13:40,632 I probably picked up on a rogue emotion of yours. 302 00:13:40,633 --> 00:13:41,910 Perhaps guilt. 303 00:13:44,637 --> 00:13:46,673 Miss Simkin? 304 00:13:46,674 --> 00:13:50,608 - 1027 on the pool deck. We need a stretcher, stat! 305 00:13:50,609 --> 00:13:52,714 What the hell was in that smoothie? 306 00:13:56,926 --> 00:13:58,512 - Let's get her cuffed up. 307 00:13:58,513 --> 00:13:59,789 - No-- No tech. I'm tech-adverse. 308 00:13:59,790 --> 00:14:00,998 No. Get it off. 309 00:14:04,071 --> 00:14:05,830 - Prep 5 grams of hydroxocobalamin. 310 00:14:05,831 --> 00:14:07,314 - Poisoned by bitter almonds? 311 00:14:07,315 --> 00:14:08,902 T-That's impossible! They're organic. 312 00:14:08,903 --> 00:14:10,593 - Yeah. So is arsenic. 313 00:14:10,594 --> 00:14:11,905 Bitter almonds contain amygdalin, 314 00:14:11,906 --> 00:14:13,493 which breaks down into hydrogen cyanide 315 00:14:13,494 --> 00:14:14,666 when ingested in high doses. 316 00:14:14,667 --> 00:14:16,772 - Be ready to initiate ACLS procedures. 317 00:14:16,773 --> 00:14:19,050 - If I'm gonna be subjected to this Western medical torture, 318 00:14:19,051 --> 00:14:20,362 I at least need to be able to breathe! 319 00:14:20,363 --> 00:14:21,881 - I'm gonna get you some oxygen right now. 320 00:14:21,882 --> 00:14:25,264 - No, no, sweetie, no. Allow my-- my body to breathe. 321 00:14:29,199 --> 00:14:30,545 - Doctor... 322 00:14:31,926 --> 00:14:33,616 - Spider angiomas. 323 00:14:38,450 --> 00:14:40,002 - Avery, this isn't cyanide poisoning. 324 00:14:40,003 --> 00:14:41,176 It's not the almonds. 325 00:14:41,177 --> 00:14:43,454 - Well, I hate to say I told you so. 326 00:14:43,455 --> 00:14:45,042 - What else is in those smoothies? 327 00:14:45,043 --> 00:14:47,803 - I can't tell you that. That's-- That's proprietary. 328 00:14:47,804 --> 00:14:50,944 I mean, that's like telling you the recipe for Coca-Cola. 329 00:14:50,945 --> 00:14:52,290 She's seizing! 330 00:14:52,291 --> 00:14:55,259 Let's get her oxygen now! 331 00:14:55,260 --> 00:14:56,985 - It's just a thickener! 332 00:14:56,986 --> 00:14:59,677 Ashwagandha root. B complex vitamins. 333 00:14:59,678 --> 00:15:02,439 A Tara powder base. - Tara powder? 334 00:15:03,993 --> 00:15:06,201 Prep for emergency dialysis now. 335 00:15:17,454 --> 00:15:20,560 Prep the machine. We're aiming for a bicarbonate dialysate. 336 00:15:20,561 --> 00:15:22,907 Start at a flow rate of 300 milliliters a minute. 337 00:15:22,908 --> 00:15:23,977 - Got it. 338 00:15:23,978 --> 00:15:26,429 - Monitoring for disequilibrium syndrome. 339 00:15:27,913 --> 00:15:29,983 Tara powder. How did you know what that was? 340 00:15:29,984 --> 00:15:32,020 - When I was working for Doctors Without Borders in Peru, 341 00:15:32,021 --> 00:15:33,745 we would get cases of kids who were accidentally eating 342 00:15:33,746 --> 00:15:35,264 the seed pods from the tara tree, 343 00:15:35,265 --> 00:15:37,887 which is toxic to the liver, and they also bind to proteins, 344 00:15:37,888 --> 00:15:39,751 making it impossible for the body to absorb them. 345 00:15:39,752 --> 00:15:42,064 She'll be fine in a few days. - Explains why people who drink 346 00:15:42,065 --> 00:15:43,963 the smoothies feel full but still lose weight. 347 00:15:43,964 --> 00:15:46,311 They're developing malnutrition. Nice. 348 00:15:47,933 --> 00:15:49,796 - Hey, gents. - Captain. 349 00:15:49,797 --> 00:15:51,177 - Say what you will about her, 350 00:15:51,178 --> 00:15:53,524 Bethany Welles puts together a hell of a gift bag. 351 00:15:53,525 --> 00:15:55,008 Care for a saltwater taffy 352 00:15:55,009 --> 00:15:57,217 made with Indian Ocean saltwater? 353 00:15:57,218 --> 00:15:59,357 - Munroe, when I was 18 years old, 354 00:15:59,358 --> 00:16:02,395 I worked a clam trawler out of Atlantic City, 355 00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:05,156 and ever since then, that taffy tastes like 356 00:16:05,157 --> 00:16:06,882 broken heart and permanent sunburn. 357 00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:10,403 Tell me about this tropical depression. 358 00:16:10,404 --> 00:16:11,852 - She's taking the usual route up the coast-- 359 00:16:11,853 --> 00:16:13,509 northwest to west-northwest. 360 00:16:13,510 --> 00:16:15,891 If we stay the course, we should only encounter the outer bands. 361 00:16:15,892 --> 00:16:17,789 Shouldn't get much choppier than this. 362 00:16:17,790 --> 00:16:19,964 - Alright. Good. I'm still gonna want 363 00:16:19,965 --> 00:16:22,311 some up-to-minute reports from the National Hurricane Center. 364 00:16:22,312 --> 00:16:23,933 Give me some bridge-to-bridge comms 365 00:16:23,934 --> 00:16:27,282 and forecasting models from OWS and GFS. 366 00:16:27,283 --> 00:16:29,870 Anything changes, we'll just turn this puppy around 367 00:16:29,871 --> 00:16:31,941 and make port in Baja. 368 00:16:31,942 --> 00:16:35,083 Meanwhile, let's smooth this damn ride out. 369 00:16:35,084 --> 00:16:36,912 - Sir. 370 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:39,432 Bridge to Control Room. Activate stabilizers. 371 00:16:39,433 --> 00:16:42,607 - Control Room copies. Activating stabilization system. 372 00:16:48,718 --> 00:16:52,065 - Folks, this is your captain coming to you from the bridge. 373 00:16:52,066 --> 00:16:55,551 Now, out on the ocean, as in life, it's not a question 374 00:16:55,552 --> 00:16:57,657 of when you're gonna encounter waves. 375 00:16:57,658 --> 00:17:00,660 It's, what do you do when they come up? 376 00:17:00,661 --> 00:17:02,627 And here on the Odyssey, 377 00:17:02,628 --> 00:17:05,768 when the waves come a-rockin'... 378 00:17:05,769 --> 00:17:09,772 we start rockin' and rollin'. 379 00:17:09,773 --> 00:17:11,429 Boom. 380 00:17:18,092 --> 00:17:19,679 - Not so much. - Yes, Chef. 381 00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:21,129 - Hmm. 382 00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:27,100 - You call that a julienne? 383 00:17:27,101 --> 00:17:28,205 - ♪ Riders on the storm 384 00:17:28,206 --> 00:17:29,551 - I call that a carrot. 385 00:17:31,933 --> 00:17:34,245 - ♪ Riders on the storm 386 00:17:34,246 --> 00:17:37,697 - Well... you're hopeless. 387 00:17:37,698 --> 00:17:39,769 - I really am. 388 00:17:40,942 --> 00:17:43,807 - ♪ Into this world, we're thrown ♪ 389 00:17:45,395 --> 00:17:47,810 ♪ Like a dog without a bone ♪ 390 00:17:47,811 --> 00:17:50,882 ♪ An actor out on loan - Back to work! 391 00:17:50,883 --> 00:17:53,609 - ♪ Riders on the storm 392 00:17:53,610 --> 00:17:55,301 - Yes, Chef. 393 00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:10,454 - Hey, Bethany. Is everything okay? 394 00:18:10,455 --> 00:18:12,214 - Absolutely not! 395 00:18:12,215 --> 00:18:14,458 My beef hearts taste like organ meat! 396 00:18:14,459 --> 00:18:16,943 Something is off. 397 00:18:16,944 --> 00:18:19,739 - I'm so sorry to hear that. The meat is fresh. 398 00:18:19,740 --> 00:18:22,086 It's emulsified with capers, shallots, anchovy paste. 399 00:18:22,087 --> 00:18:23,363 It's the same as always. 400 00:18:23,364 --> 00:18:25,365 - Listing the ingredients doesn't help, Viv! 401 00:18:25,366 --> 00:18:26,849 Clearly we made a mistake! 402 00:18:26,850 --> 00:18:28,472 You know, you're a talented cook, 403 00:18:28,473 --> 00:18:31,958 but it takes a real brilliant chef to work at this scale. 404 00:18:31,959 --> 00:18:34,236 Alright? Just get rid of it. Take it away. 405 00:18:34,237 --> 00:18:36,238 And do that thing I like with the Spam and the mozzarella 406 00:18:36,239 --> 00:18:37,998 and mix it up so it looks like tartare. 407 00:18:37,999 --> 00:18:41,381 - Okay? Can you do that?! - That's cooking 101! 408 00:18:41,382 --> 00:18:43,038 - Of course. - Thank you. 409 00:18:52,566 --> 00:18:53,876 - What? 410 00:18:53,877 --> 00:18:54,981 We're friends. 411 00:18:54,982 --> 00:18:57,397 You're "friends"? 412 00:18:57,398 --> 00:18:59,848 I thought you were trying to not do this. 413 00:18:59,849 --> 00:19:01,229 - Do what? - I support 414 00:19:01,230 --> 00:19:02,954 whatever you're doing or not doing. 415 00:19:02,955 --> 00:19:05,957 She's talented, successful. Maybe this thing has legs. 416 00:19:05,958 --> 00:19:08,477 It's got legs. Long ones. 417 00:19:08,478 --> 00:19:10,755 Her food is awful. I can't eat this. 418 00:19:10,756 --> 00:19:12,895 - For whatever it's worth, my liver mousse is really tasty. 419 00:19:12,896 --> 00:19:14,380 - Yeah, well, it's making me nauseous. 420 00:19:14,381 --> 00:19:16,796 - Then go have a Hot Pocket in your cabin! 421 00:19:16,797 --> 00:19:18,970 - You know what? I think I will. 422 00:19:24,218 --> 00:19:26,840 - No. Nope. We're not doing this again. 423 00:19:26,841 --> 00:19:28,187 No more drama in the infirmary. 424 00:19:28,188 --> 00:19:30,361 Go quash whatever that is right now. 425 00:19:40,441 --> 00:19:43,788 - Looks like we're on the other side of that storm system. 426 00:19:43,789 --> 00:19:45,238 - Yeah, maybe. 427 00:19:45,239 --> 00:19:46,344 - Hey. 428 00:19:48,035 --> 00:19:49,208 What is your problem? 429 00:19:49,209 --> 00:19:50,726 Are you jealous or something? 430 00:19:50,727 --> 00:19:52,487 Of you and-- 431 00:19:52,488 --> 00:19:54,247 No, babe, I'm not jealous. 432 00:19:54,248 --> 00:19:57,355 You rejected me. 433 00:19:58,494 --> 00:20:00,564 And now that I'm moving on and I've found someone 434 00:20:00,565 --> 00:20:02,981 that I actually like, it's making you crazy. 435 00:20:03,982 --> 00:20:08,123 What? She's nice and she's smart. 436 00:20:08,124 --> 00:20:09,504 She's an extremely good cook. 437 00:20:09,505 --> 00:20:11,368 - She literally doesn't cook. That's her whole thing. 438 00:20:11,369 --> 00:20:12,610 She's a talking Cuisinart-- - Hey, guys. 439 00:20:12,611 --> 00:20:14,888 - Ah... 440 00:20:14,889 --> 00:20:17,822 - Ah, imagine coming out onto the deck... 441 00:20:17,823 --> 00:20:20,722 only to find people talking about you. 442 00:20:20,723 --> 00:20:22,102 Not cool. 443 00:20:22,103 --> 00:20:24,104 I'm going to bed. I feel sick. 444 00:20:24,105 --> 00:20:26,348 - Have a bit too much Zinfandel? 445 00:20:26,349 --> 00:20:27,763 - No, actually. I had a lot of whatever you made tonight. 446 00:20:27,764 --> 00:20:30,387 - Hey. Cut it out. Knock it off over there. 447 00:20:30,388 --> 00:20:32,320 We got bigger fish to fry. 448 00:20:32,321 --> 00:20:34,563 We're not on the other side of this storm. 449 00:20:34,564 --> 00:20:36,185 We're in the eye of it. 450 00:20:36,186 --> 00:20:38,395 Damn thing must have built up around us. 451 00:20:38,396 --> 00:20:40,845 Brandon, give me your walkie. 452 00:20:46,266 --> 00:20:47,680 - Captain Massey to the bridge. 453 00:20:47,681 --> 00:20:50,130 Munroe, what's it look like on the Doppler? 454 00:20:53,169 --> 00:20:55,929 First Officer Munroe, come in. 455 00:20:57,035 --> 00:20:59,139 First officer Munroe, come in. 456 00:21:13,638 --> 00:21:15,604 Psilocybin. 457 00:21:15,605 --> 00:21:18,194 Ohh. Beautiful. 458 00:21:19,885 --> 00:21:22,784 - What-- - What's going on, Cap? 459 00:21:22,785 --> 00:21:24,924 - Well, Munroe, what's going on 460 00:21:24,925 --> 00:21:28,410 is you're higher than Snoop D-O Double G... 461 00:21:28,411 --> 00:21:30,170 and we're in the middle of a hurricane, 462 00:21:30,171 --> 00:21:31,413 maybe one of the worst 463 00:21:31,414 --> 00:21:33,622 I've ever seen in this part of the Pacific. 464 00:21:33,623 --> 00:21:34,899 High? 465 00:21:34,900 --> 00:21:36,970 - Yeah. - I'm high? What? 466 00:21:36,971 --> 00:21:39,214 - Yeah. You're alright. 467 00:21:39,215 --> 00:21:40,940 You didn't get into that, did you? 468 00:21:40,941 --> 00:21:42,286 - No, sir. 469 00:21:42,287 --> 00:21:43,874 - That's one in a row. 470 00:21:43,875 --> 00:21:45,325 - Hmm... 471 00:21:48,742 --> 00:21:50,398 - Folks, this is your captain 472 00:21:50,399 --> 00:21:52,848 calling from the bridge deck with an update. 473 00:21:54,644 --> 00:21:57,163 Well, it appears that Mother Nature has decided 474 00:21:57,164 --> 00:21:59,476 to come along for the ride this week. 475 00:21:59,477 --> 00:22:01,374 As calm as it may seem right now, 476 00:22:01,375 --> 00:22:05,861 we are actually in the eye of a hurricane. 477 00:22:05,862 --> 00:22:08,933 The worst of the storm could hit in a few hours or a day. 478 00:22:08,934 --> 00:22:10,728 Remain calm and await further announcement. 479 00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:13,179 I told you there was 480 00:22:13,180 --> 00:22:15,182 something wrong with that food! 481 00:22:22,051 --> 00:22:23,810 Avery, you in there? 482 00:22:23,811 --> 00:22:25,294 You okay? 483 00:22:25,295 --> 00:22:27,780 - Ugh. - I'm not leaving 484 00:22:27,781 --> 00:22:29,609 until I see whatever ingenious thing 485 00:22:29,610 --> 00:22:32,061 you've fashioned into a barf bucket. 486 00:22:40,932 --> 00:22:42,796 - It's from the nursery. 487 00:22:44,211 --> 00:22:46,350 It's for sandcastles. 488 00:22:46,351 --> 00:22:47,938 - Not anymore. 489 00:22:47,939 --> 00:22:50,147 Okay. Infirmary. Come on. Let's go. 490 00:22:50,148 --> 00:22:52,943 - I have food poisoning. Just let me cocoon in privacy. 491 00:22:52,944 --> 00:22:54,669 - How do you know it's food poisoning? 492 00:22:54,670 --> 00:22:57,879 - Oh, because I am a very good nurse, Maxwell. 493 00:22:57,880 --> 00:22:59,984 Abdominal pain, vomiting, and, 494 00:22:59,985 --> 00:23:02,677 oh, yeah, eating a plateful of raw meat. 495 00:23:02,678 --> 00:23:04,782 - Is it a broad pain or a sharp, persistent pain? 496 00:23:04,783 --> 00:23:06,922 - You are a sharp, persistent pain. 497 00:23:06,923 --> 00:23:09,235 We don't self-diagnose. 498 00:23:09,236 --> 00:23:11,237 Them's the rules. Infirmary! Come on! 499 00:23:11,238 --> 00:23:12,928 - No. I can hardly stand. 500 00:23:12,929 --> 00:23:15,897 How do you expect me to walk to the infirmary? 501 00:23:20,592 --> 00:23:21,661 No. 502 00:23:23,492 --> 00:23:27,736 - Purify the space! To create a better place! 503 00:23:27,737 --> 00:23:30,912 Purify the space! Put it on your face! 504 00:23:32,293 --> 00:23:35,434 - I leave for five minut-- Are you burning sage?! 505 00:23:35,435 --> 00:23:37,677 - Create a better place! Purify the space! 506 00:23:37,678 --> 00:23:40,439 Create a better place! Purify the space! 507 00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:42,061 - Hey, Tristan. - Yeah? 508 00:23:42,062 --> 00:23:43,614 - You call that in to the bridge, make sure they know 509 00:23:43,615 --> 00:23:45,271 there's nothing on fire down here. 510 00:23:45,272 --> 00:23:46,893 - Way ahead of you. She showed up and started 511 00:23:46,894 --> 00:23:48,861 babbling about healing rituals. 512 00:23:48,862 --> 00:23:50,483 - Need a hand over here with Avery. 513 00:23:50,484 --> 00:23:52,658 I need her vitals and put her on-- - 500-mil saline bag. 514 00:23:52,659 --> 00:23:54,280 4 milligrams ondansetron for nausea? 515 00:23:54,281 --> 00:23:55,695 - My guy. And for pain? - Ozone. 516 00:23:55,696 --> 00:23:57,179 - No, I was gonna say Toradol, but... 517 00:23:57,180 --> 00:23:59,458 - No. She's inhaling the ozone. 518 00:23:59,459 --> 00:24:01,770 - Oh, God! Bethany! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! 519 00:24:01,771 --> 00:24:05,256 We do not inhale the ozone. That's toxic. 520 00:24:05,257 --> 00:24:06,775 Okay. Hi, Bethany. Hi. Hi. Hi. 521 00:24:06,776 --> 00:24:08,467 I'm gonna need to take your vitals. Okay? 522 00:24:08,468 --> 00:24:10,986 - Mm-hmm. - Stick with me for one sec. 523 00:24:10,987 --> 00:24:12,643 - I can do this. - Dr. Odyssey! 524 00:24:12,644 --> 00:24:13,782 - Hey, Tristan. - Yeah? 525 00:24:13,783 --> 00:24:15,059 - I need a CBC and a tox screen. 526 00:24:15,060 --> 00:24:16,267 I think she might have ingested something. 527 00:24:16,268 --> 00:24:17,786 - Yeah, a spoonful of bath salts maybe? 528 00:24:17,787 --> 00:24:20,064 - Also prep some Ativan. We're gonna do a grab-and-stab. 529 00:24:20,065 --> 00:24:21,687 - Grab-and-stab. - Hi, Bethany. Hi. Hi. 530 00:24:21,688 --> 00:24:25,414 How you doing? Deep breaths. One breath. Two breath. 531 00:24:25,415 --> 00:24:27,313 Three deep-- Three deep breaths. 532 00:24:27,314 --> 00:24:29,627 - Sleep well, B. Welles. 533 00:24:32,008 --> 00:24:34,700 - Let's get her in some straps, just in case. 534 00:24:42,571 --> 00:24:44,503 We're back with you. 535 00:24:44,504 --> 00:24:46,850 - Alright. What happens when you palpate your right side? 536 00:24:46,851 --> 00:24:49,473 - Oww! Rebound pain. 537 00:24:49,474 --> 00:24:51,544 Okay. It's not food poisoning. 538 00:24:51,545 --> 00:24:53,581 It's either, um-- It's kidney stones, diverticulitis... 539 00:24:53,582 --> 00:24:56,411 - Or appendicitis. - Appendicitis? 540 00:24:56,412 --> 00:24:58,206 Do we have time to do tests, a CT scan? 541 00:24:58,207 --> 00:24:59,345 - No, but we don't need to. 542 00:24:59,346 --> 00:25:00,829 Are you familiar with RPO procedure? 543 00:25:00,830 --> 00:25:02,106 - Nuh-unh. - There are three checks. 544 00:25:02,107 --> 00:25:03,625 One, pain in the lower-right quadrant. 545 00:25:03,626 --> 00:25:04,833 You've already exhibited that. 546 00:25:04,834 --> 00:25:06,939 Two pain when the right leg is flexed. 547 00:25:06,940 --> 00:25:08,354 Check. 548 00:25:08,355 --> 00:25:10,321 Three, pain when the hip is put into interior rotation. 549 00:25:10,322 --> 00:25:12,634 - Ow! Check, check, check! Ding, ding, ding! 550 00:25:12,635 --> 00:25:15,119 Max, I think you're gonna have to operate. 551 00:25:15,120 --> 00:25:16,569 Ooh! It feels like it's gonna rupture! 552 00:25:16,570 --> 00:25:18,295 - Yeah, I told you. I told you. 553 00:25:18,296 --> 00:25:19,607 I told you it wasn't food poisoning. 554 00:25:19,608 --> 00:25:21,609 Why won't you listen to me, Aves?! 555 00:25:23,508 --> 00:25:26,786 - All guests, please return to your cabins. 556 00:25:26,787 --> 00:25:29,996 All guests, please return to your cabins. 557 00:25:36,728 --> 00:25:39,592 - Well, we've outrun her about as long as we can. 558 00:25:41,112 --> 00:25:44,873 Rosie, set speed to 120 RPMs. 559 00:25:44,874 --> 00:25:49,671 Helmsman, adjust your heading to 045 degrees. 560 00:25:49,672 --> 00:25:51,639 Set condition Zebra. 561 00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:54,469 All hands, prepare for heavy weather. 562 00:25:54,470 --> 00:25:56,022 Secure all openings. 563 00:25:56,023 --> 00:25:58,335 I want this ship drier than Rosie's stories 564 00:25:58,336 --> 00:26:00,199 about growing up in Dowagiac. 565 00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:03,651 - Roger that. But you live for my stories, Cap! Don't lie! 566 00:26:03,652 --> 00:26:05,100 - Engage heeling pumps on starboard 567 00:26:05,101 --> 00:26:07,102 to counteract portside list. 568 00:26:07,103 --> 00:26:09,415 - Good idea, Tim Leary. Did you get that, Rosie? 569 00:26:09,416 --> 00:26:11,798 Heard it and on it. 570 00:26:14,455 --> 00:26:17,665 - Folks, this is the Captain coming from the bridge deck. 571 00:26:17,666 --> 00:26:19,252 Well-- 572 00:26:19,253 --> 00:26:21,738 It's a funny thing about being surrounded on all sides. 573 00:26:21,739 --> 00:26:23,567 The only way out is through. 574 00:26:23,568 --> 00:26:26,432 Go to your cabins, secure your belongings, 575 00:26:26,433 --> 00:26:28,572 and brace for rough water. 576 00:26:28,573 --> 00:26:31,576 - Infirmary to Bridge. Captain, you there? 577 00:26:34,406 --> 00:26:36,649 - Yeah, Max. What do you need? 578 00:26:36,650 --> 00:26:38,340 - Honestly, I need a miracle. 579 00:26:38,341 --> 00:26:40,239 It's Avery. Her appendix is about to burst. 580 00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:41,654 We need to do emergency surgery. 581 00:26:41,655 --> 00:26:44,139 I need 20 minutes of calm waters. 582 00:26:46,591 --> 00:26:48,868 - Is that 20 consecutive minutes? 583 00:26:48,869 --> 00:26:50,490 - I'll take 'em how I can get 'em. 584 00:26:50,491 --> 00:26:52,113 - Alright. Stay calm. 585 00:26:52,114 --> 00:26:53,873 Avery's in good hands with you and Tristan, 586 00:26:53,874 --> 00:26:55,944 and you're in good hands with me and the bridge crew up here. 587 00:26:55,945 --> 00:26:57,670 I'm gonna get you that 20 minutes, 588 00:26:57,671 --> 00:26:59,672 but it's not gonna be all at once. 589 00:26:59,673 --> 00:27:02,399 It's gonna take the better part of the next hour. 590 00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:05,885 I got an idea. It's an old seamen's maneuver. 591 00:27:05,886 --> 00:27:08,267 It violates about 50 nautical laws... 592 00:27:08,268 --> 00:27:10,338 but we'll deal with that later. 593 00:27:10,339 --> 00:27:12,202 The only thing you have to do is stay calm 594 00:27:12,203 --> 00:27:14,687 and follow my instructions to the letter. 595 00:27:14,688 --> 00:27:16,309 Can you do it? 596 00:27:16,310 --> 00:27:18,035 - Yes, sir. We can do it. 597 00:27:23,455 --> 00:27:24,628 - Alright. 598 00:27:24,629 --> 00:27:26,906 This is how "trough riding" works. 599 00:27:26,907 --> 00:27:30,289 We're gonna navigate this storm in a big zig-zag pattern. 600 00:27:30,290 --> 00:27:32,981 I'm gonna position the ship in the trough of a wave, 601 00:27:32,982 --> 00:27:35,708 and that should carry us along for a couple minutes. 602 00:27:35,709 --> 00:27:38,987 When we absolutely have to, I'll give warning 603 00:27:38,988 --> 00:27:41,887 and we'll make a hard 90-degree turn, 604 00:27:41,888 --> 00:27:43,958 thrust through the wave and into the next trough, 605 00:27:43,959 --> 00:27:45,718 which should buy us a couple more minutes. 606 00:27:45,719 --> 00:27:47,789 - So instead of steady rocking, we'll have moments of calm 607 00:27:47,790 --> 00:27:50,654 followed by "Whoa, mama, hang on to your hat!" 608 00:27:50,655 --> 00:27:53,450 That's exactly right, Rosie. 609 00:27:53,451 --> 00:27:57,178 Guys, the life of one of our own is on the line down there. 610 00:27:57,179 --> 00:27:58,973 The only way this works is if we stay 611 00:27:58,974 --> 00:28:01,769 in constant contact and communication. Copy? 612 00:28:01,770 --> 00:28:03,633 - Yes, sir. - Copy that. 613 00:28:09,191 --> 00:28:10,916 - How am I supposed to pull this off, huh? 614 00:28:10,917 --> 00:28:12,641 Without you bossing me around? 615 00:28:12,642 --> 00:28:14,091 - Just remember-- if you kill me, 616 00:28:14,092 --> 00:28:15,921 my ghost is gonna come crop-dust you 617 00:28:15,922 --> 00:28:17,750 every time you're alone with a girl. 618 00:28:29,211 --> 00:28:31,315 - Intubating now. 619 00:28:31,316 --> 00:28:34,526 - Alright, team. We're entering the first trough. 620 00:28:36,252 --> 00:28:38,909 - Cutting along the McBurney line now. 621 00:28:38,910 --> 00:28:40,462 Access. 622 00:28:46,676 --> 00:28:49,540 Locating the appendix. 623 00:28:49,541 --> 00:28:50,783 - Got it. 624 00:28:50,784 --> 00:28:52,890 - Time's up! I gotta make the turn! 625 00:28:54,512 --> 00:28:55,961 - One sec, Cap! 626 00:28:55,962 --> 00:28:57,825 - Don't have it. Brace now. 627 00:29:05,109 --> 00:29:08,145 - Watch it. If those hit the ground, they're useless. 628 00:29:15,878 --> 00:29:17,706 - Yeah. There it is. I got it. 629 00:29:20,607 --> 00:29:21,710 - Clamp. 630 00:29:25,681 --> 00:29:26,715 Clamp. 631 00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,348 - Brace for impact. Brace! 632 00:29:43,285 --> 00:29:46,874 - Sir, the wind. It's changing direction on us. 633 00:29:46,875 --> 00:29:49,048 - We got a rogue wave coming. 634 00:29:49,049 --> 00:29:51,154 Get ready. Brace yourself now! 635 00:30:02,166 --> 00:30:04,581 - Ligatures are loose. I got uncontrolled bleeding. 636 00:30:04,582 --> 00:30:06,825 I need visualization, stat. 637 00:30:17,146 --> 00:30:18,665 Yeah. We're good. 638 00:30:20,253 --> 00:30:22,185 - We're okay, Cap. We lost you there. 639 00:30:22,186 --> 00:30:24,601 But we're okay. All three of us. 640 00:30:24,602 --> 00:30:26,430 - Well, I'm glad to hear it. 641 00:30:26,431 --> 00:30:29,226 It's not over yet, but I think we're through the worst of it. 642 00:30:36,510 --> 00:30:38,028 - It's still too shaky. 643 00:30:38,029 --> 00:30:39,754 I can't get the sutures to stick. 644 00:30:39,755 --> 00:30:41,239 - Can I? 645 00:30:50,007 --> 00:30:51,560 - Got it. 646 00:30:52,078 --> 00:30:56,012 - We call this the "cruise ship knot." 647 00:30:56,013 --> 00:30:58,462 It's the same as a square knot, 648 00:30:58,463 --> 00:31:00,913 but you double the back loops. 649 00:31:00,914 --> 00:31:02,881 You see? 650 00:31:02,882 --> 00:31:04,710 Scissors. 651 00:31:04,711 --> 00:31:08,265 - That's actually... very smart. 652 00:31:08,266 --> 00:31:10,336 - Well... 653 00:31:10,337 --> 00:31:12,511 I do know some things, Doc. 654 00:31:17,172 --> 00:31:19,380 - Whoo! - Yes. 655 00:31:19,381 --> 00:31:22,935 - Yeah, baby! That was fun! Wanna do it again? 656 00:31:22,936 --> 00:31:26,180 - Whoo! That's what I'm talking about, baby! 657 00:31:34,292 --> 00:31:36,638 - Hey, Tristan... 658 00:31:36,639 --> 00:31:38,640 You know a lot more than some things. 659 00:31:38,641 --> 00:31:41,195 That was incredible work. 660 00:31:41,196 --> 00:31:43,922 I wouldn't have wanted anybody else in there with me. 661 00:32:00,456 --> 00:32:02,043 - Her blood pressure's dropping. Heartbeat's irregular. 662 00:32:02,044 --> 00:32:04,356 - Looks like she vomited during the storm. 663 00:32:04,357 --> 00:32:05,426 Let's get her on her side so she doesn't aspirate. 664 00:32:05,427 --> 00:32:08,049 - Yeah. - Ready? One. Two. Three. 665 00:32:08,050 --> 00:32:09,602 - Do you think it's drugs? 666 00:32:09,603 --> 00:32:11,466 Hallucinogenic therapy? 667 00:32:11,467 --> 00:32:13,882 - I'm not so sure. Look at her wrists. Swelling. 668 00:32:13,883 --> 00:32:15,919 Yellowing of the fingernails. 669 00:32:15,920 --> 00:32:18,197 - Jaundice. Something to do with her liver. 670 00:32:21,822 --> 00:32:23,169 Oh. 671 00:32:24,101 --> 00:32:26,412 Such negative auras. 672 00:32:26,413 --> 00:32:27,863 Ugh. 673 00:32:29,761 --> 00:32:31,624 - That's what she said to me when we first met. 674 00:32:31,625 --> 00:32:34,007 I had a "crimson aura." 675 00:32:36,285 --> 00:32:37,837 Bingo. 676 00:32:37,838 --> 00:32:39,391 Kayser-Fleischer rings. 677 00:32:39,392 --> 00:32:42,635 - Uh, w-what? - It's copper poisoning. 678 00:32:42,636 --> 00:32:45,017 Y-You see the rust-colored rings around her Iris? 679 00:32:45,018 --> 00:32:46,467 - Mm-hmm. - That's why she's seeing auras. 680 00:32:46,468 --> 00:32:47,986 Her vision's clouded. It also explains 681 00:32:47,987 --> 00:32:50,816 the neurological symptoms and the ataxia. 682 00:32:50,817 --> 00:32:53,750 Organ meat-- extremely high in heavy metals. 683 00:32:53,751 --> 00:32:56,580 And liver is high in copper. She needs chelation therapy. 684 00:32:56,581 --> 00:32:57,961 We need to detox her system. 685 00:32:57,962 --> 00:32:59,583 Let's get her on an I.V. of penicillamine. 686 00:32:59,584 --> 00:33:01,033 - Yeah. - Ondansetron for nausea. 687 00:33:01,034 --> 00:33:02,724 Also let's put her on a normal saline bolus 688 00:33:02,725 --> 00:33:04,933 just to flush out her system. - I got it. 689 00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:25,057 Hmm. 690 00:33:25,058 --> 00:33:28,198 Energy meridians run like streams through the body. 691 00:33:28,199 --> 00:33:31,408 Strong emotions muddy the waters, pollute the soul. 692 00:33:31,409 --> 00:33:34,101 - Agnes, are you sure you're ready to do this? 693 00:33:34,102 --> 00:33:36,344 I mean, I thought I killed you. 694 00:33:36,345 --> 00:33:38,829 - Sweetie, it's gonna take more than a smoothie to get rid of me. 695 00:33:38,830 --> 00:33:40,279 Hm! 696 00:33:40,280 --> 00:33:43,282 - I'm closing up shop. I've blended my last bebida. 697 00:33:43,283 --> 00:33:45,698 - Judy, sweetie, you're a healer, for Goddess' sake. 698 00:33:45,699 --> 00:33:47,769 You can't quit that easy. 699 00:33:47,770 --> 00:33:49,185 Did I ever tell you about that pro golfer 700 00:33:49,186 --> 00:33:50,669 whose shoulder I was working on? 701 00:33:50,670 --> 00:33:52,464 I can't say who he is, of course, 702 00:33:52,465 --> 00:33:54,983 but let's just say he was a real "big cat" 703 00:33:54,984 --> 00:33:55,984 if you catch my drift. 704 00:33:55,985 --> 00:33:57,193 It was Tiger Woods. Yeah. 705 00:33:57,194 --> 00:33:59,781 I was tapping his Yunmen, the cloud gate, 706 00:33:59,782 --> 00:34:01,438 but I was a millimeter off. 707 00:34:01,439 --> 00:34:03,337 He lost sensation in his whole arm 708 00:34:03,338 --> 00:34:05,201 a week before the Masters. 709 00:34:05,202 --> 00:34:08,238 Gradually over the next six days, sensation returned. 710 00:34:08,239 --> 00:34:10,896 And that weekend, he shot 18 below par, 711 00:34:10,897 --> 00:34:14,244 took home the Green Jacket. 712 00:34:14,245 --> 00:34:17,765 It's amazing what miracles can happen with catastrophe. 713 00:34:17,766 --> 00:34:21,632 Huh. I'm sensing a real imbalance right here in your Tianliao. 714 00:34:22,771 --> 00:34:24,599 Yeah. Inhale deeply for me. 715 00:34:28,811 --> 00:34:31,123 Ooh. That one felt kind of funny. 716 00:34:31,124 --> 00:34:34,022 - Oh, yeah. That's toxicity leaving the body. 717 00:34:34,023 --> 00:34:37,371 Now exhale all that negativity. 718 00:34:46,726 --> 00:34:48,520 - Judy, does it hurt when you breathe? 719 00:34:48,521 --> 00:34:50,901 - Yes. - Her lips are turning blue. 720 00:34:50,902 --> 00:34:53,283 Central cyanosis. O2 SATS are at 88%. 721 00:34:53,284 --> 00:34:55,147 She needs oxygen. - How long are these needles? 722 00:34:55,148 --> 00:34:58,081 - Uh, they range. The black ones are 100 millimeters. 723 00:34:58,082 --> 00:35:00,359 - 100 millimeters? 724 00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:03,707 The intrapleural space is 25 millimeters, 725 00:35:03,708 --> 00:35:05,468 so what you've done here is punctured her lung. 726 00:35:05,469 --> 00:35:07,711 Now all the air is rushing out into her chest cavity 727 00:35:07,712 --> 00:35:09,057 and it's crushing her heart and lungs. 728 00:35:09,058 --> 00:35:11,474 - O2 SATS are at 70. - Prep for a thoracostomy. 729 00:35:11,475 --> 00:35:12,958 I'm gonna get these needles out now. 730 00:35:12,959 --> 00:35:14,304 - No! No, no, no! Are you crazy?! 731 00:35:14,305 --> 00:35:15,685 If you interrupt her treatment now, 732 00:35:15,686 --> 00:35:17,342 you could permanently alter her energy pathways! 733 00:35:17,343 --> 00:35:19,585 What she needs is to breathe through this. 734 00:35:19,586 --> 00:35:21,035 - The only way she's breathing through this 735 00:35:21,036 --> 00:35:22,450 is through a chest tube. 736 00:35:22,451 --> 00:35:25,143 - Judy, when I tell you, I'm gonna need you 737 00:35:25,144 --> 00:35:27,179 to breathe out all the air in your lungs and hold it. 738 00:35:27,180 --> 00:35:28,215 Okay? 739 00:35:36,327 --> 00:35:38,225 Scalpel. 740 00:35:38,226 --> 00:35:39,398 Ready? 741 00:35:39,399 --> 00:35:40,951 - Hm. 742 00:35:40,952 --> 00:35:43,126 - Okay. Now. 743 00:35:50,479 --> 00:35:51,755 This is gonna hurt a little. 744 00:36:02,008 --> 00:36:03,595 Drape. - Okay. 745 00:36:03,596 --> 00:36:05,769 - Finish dressing the wound. Monitor her vitals. 746 00:36:05,770 --> 00:36:07,219 I'm gonna go check on Avery. - She's fine. 747 00:36:07,220 --> 00:36:08,427 She's better than ever, actually. 748 00:36:08,428 --> 00:36:10,465 She needed this. She needed this. 749 00:36:20,233 --> 00:36:21,509 - You! 750 00:36:21,510 --> 00:36:23,616 Me. 751 00:36:26,239 --> 00:36:31,416 I must say. This is feeling very "Gift of the Magi." 752 00:36:31,417 --> 00:36:35,972 - Is that that story about the poor husband and wife 753 00:36:35,973 --> 00:36:39,839 who try to buy each other the perfect Christmas present? 754 00:36:40,736 --> 00:36:43,255 She sells her hair to buy him a watch chain. 755 00:36:43,256 --> 00:36:46,258 He sells his watch to buy her a comb. 756 00:36:46,259 --> 00:36:48,571 - Two people with the purest of intentions 757 00:36:48,572 --> 00:36:50,918 ensnared by the cruelest circumstances. 758 00:36:50,919 --> 00:36:52,575 - Are you trying to turn this into some kind of-- 759 00:36:52,576 --> 00:36:53,852 - Shh, shh, shh. Sweetie, sweetie. 760 00:36:53,853 --> 00:36:56,095 I can intuit what you're thinking. 761 00:36:56,096 --> 00:36:59,237 Okay? And I forgive you. 762 00:36:59,238 --> 00:37:02,309 - You nearly killed me, you carnival-act fraud. 763 00:37:05,244 --> 00:37:08,143 - Stop! Break it up! - She crossed a boundary! 764 00:37:10,076 --> 00:37:13,285 - I am thrilled to announce the launch of our new product, 765 00:37:13,286 --> 00:37:17,634 B. Welles Detox, a high-quality, at-home chelation system 766 00:37:17,635 --> 00:37:21,294 that will help remove heavy toxic metals from our systems. 767 00:37:22,261 --> 00:37:24,054 - Pollutants she put there. 768 00:37:25,678 --> 00:37:28,818 Stay super sweet. Really beautiful dress. 769 00:37:28,819 --> 00:37:31,924 Anyhoozle... I'm very excited to say 770 00:37:31,925 --> 00:37:35,342 that I'll be partnering with the fabulous Purdue Pharma. 771 00:37:35,343 --> 00:37:38,138 Can we do another one, Rowan? 772 00:37:39,278 --> 00:37:41,934 - I am ending up with some ceremonial-grade lip balm. 773 00:37:41,935 --> 00:37:43,384 - As am I. 774 00:37:43,385 --> 00:37:46,076 - Oh. Big bet. - Big time. 775 00:37:46,077 --> 00:37:47,802 - Wait a minute. 776 00:37:47,803 --> 00:37:50,529 Are you gambling with precious B. Welles products? 777 00:37:50,530 --> 00:37:52,635 - And losing quite badly, I might add. 778 00:37:52,636 --> 00:37:55,948 - I would happily trade all the serums and balms in the world 779 00:37:55,949 --> 00:37:59,262 to never have to do a Wellness Week ever again. 780 00:37:59,263 --> 00:38:02,645 - Hear, hear. Cap? Please? No, we can't. 781 00:38:02,646 --> 00:38:05,786 - I'm one step ahead of you whiners. As usual. 782 00:38:05,787 --> 00:38:08,271 I spoke to Lenore this morning. 783 00:38:08,272 --> 00:38:10,894 We are not renewing with B. Welles. 784 00:38:10,895 --> 00:38:13,449 Didn't hurt that Lenore had broken out in hives 785 00:38:13,450 --> 00:38:17,315 from one of the sunless tanners that Bethany had given her. 786 00:38:17,316 --> 00:38:18,868 Well, from now on, 787 00:38:18,869 --> 00:38:21,560 when it comes to wellness, I'm sticking to the classics. 788 00:38:21,561 --> 00:38:24,356 Eat your veggies, take the stairs, drink water. 789 00:38:24,357 --> 00:38:25,633 - And regular checkups. 790 00:38:25,634 --> 00:38:28,291 - And maybe a colonic here or there. 791 00:38:28,292 --> 00:38:30,293 - Hi. Soup. 792 00:38:30,294 --> 00:38:33,192 It's cooked. I promise. 793 00:38:33,193 --> 00:38:35,781 - Is this an olive branch? 794 00:38:35,782 --> 00:38:37,990 - Uh, well, it's my chicken cassoulet 795 00:38:37,991 --> 00:38:40,717 with basil oil and white truffle. 796 00:38:40,718 --> 00:38:44,514 All of that raw-meat stuff, that was Bethany. 797 00:38:44,515 --> 00:38:46,861 This is more me. 798 00:38:46,862 --> 00:38:48,622 - Oh, wow. 799 00:38:48,623 --> 00:38:51,383 That's, um-- That's incredible. 800 00:38:51,384 --> 00:38:53,696 - Well, there's more where that came from. 801 00:38:53,697 --> 00:38:57,009 - Uh, reminds me-- Chef Ricamore has, uh, 802 00:38:57,010 --> 00:39:00,323 suddenly made an abrupt departure from the Odyssey. 803 00:39:00,324 --> 00:39:03,740 Something crazy like a newborn baby girl or something. 804 00:39:03,741 --> 00:39:06,709 So Vivian has graciously agreed 805 00:39:06,710 --> 00:39:08,849 to stay with us for the rest of the season. 806 00:39:08,850 --> 00:39:11,472 - Oh, wait. You, uh-- You quit your job with Bethany? 807 00:39:11,473 --> 00:39:13,336 Congrats. - Yeah. 808 00:39:13,337 --> 00:39:16,788 She gave a whole new meaning to toxic work environment. 809 00:39:16,789 --> 00:39:18,030 - Mm-hmm. - I'm looking forward to 810 00:39:18,031 --> 00:39:20,136 cooking for people who are actually sane. 811 00:39:21,897 --> 00:39:24,830 - Oh, well, let me know when you find those people. 812 00:39:26,592 --> 00:39:29,179 Okay. Well, that's my cue. 813 00:39:29,180 --> 00:39:33,080 This week, I give you three permission to stay below deck 814 00:39:33,081 --> 00:39:36,324 while we manage the disembarkment. 815 00:39:36,325 --> 00:39:37,498 Come with me? 816 00:39:37,499 --> 00:39:38,844 - Yeah. I'll, um-- I'll see you around. 817 00:39:38,845 --> 00:39:39,949 - Yeah, yeah. Okay. 818 00:39:39,950 --> 00:39:43,021 I will catch you on the port side. Ha-ha. 819 00:39:43,022 --> 00:39:44,988 Really, Tristan? 820 00:39:44,989 --> 00:39:46,783 - Real talk. 821 00:39:46,784 --> 00:39:48,578 I almost died last night, didn't I? 822 00:39:48,579 --> 00:39:50,028 - What?! No. 823 00:39:50,029 --> 00:39:51,857 - Once you were out, there were hardly any waves. 824 00:39:51,858 --> 00:39:54,895 Honestly. We breezed right through it. It was simple. 825 00:39:54,896 --> 00:39:58,243 - Hmm. Yeah. Okay. Go on. Get out of here. 826 00:39:58,244 --> 00:39:59,934 You only get two days before the next cruise. 827 00:39:59,935 --> 00:40:03,213 You don't want to waste them here. 828 00:40:03,214 --> 00:40:06,700 Roller skating on the boardwalk or play Whac-A-Mole 829 00:40:06,701 --> 00:40:08,702 or whatever it is you do in your free time. What are you doing? 830 00:40:08,703 --> 00:40:10,876 - You know, I was never any good at roller-skating. 831 00:40:10,877 --> 00:40:14,466 - I don't play Whac-A-Mole because of ethical issues. 832 00:40:14,467 --> 00:40:16,986 Animal cruelty. 833 00:40:16,987 --> 00:40:18,401 Now, if you're not gonna eat that soup, 834 00:40:18,402 --> 00:40:20,299 I have a delicious new recipe. 835 00:40:20,300 --> 00:40:22,543 It's pizza rolls, but you don't cook them. 836 00:40:22,544 --> 00:40:23,820 You eat them raw. 837 00:40:23,821 --> 00:40:25,512 - Yes, we plucked them from the pepperoni tree, 838 00:40:25,513 --> 00:40:27,030 just like our ancestors used to. 839 00:40:27,031 --> 00:40:30,482 - Ah. Idiots. - Both of you. 840 00:40:30,483 --> 00:40:34,175 If I bust these sutures, you're fixing 'em. 841 00:40:34,176 --> 00:40:36,281 Ugh. Okay. Deal me a hand. 842 00:40:36,282 --> 00:40:37,558 I think I'm getting the hang of this. 843 00:40:37,559 --> 00:40:39,111 - Ceremonial-grade lip balm. 844 00:40:39,112 --> 00:40:40,906 What kind of ceremony needs lip balm? 845 00:40:40,907 --> 00:40:43,115 - Oh, wouldn't you love to know? 846 00:40:44,980 --> 00:40:47,465 Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! 847 00:40:47,466 --> 00:40:49,397 - Your sutures. - Ow! 848 00:40:50,986 --> 00:40:52,229 - Stop it. 59912

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