Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:27,652 --> 00:00:29,820
Oh, yeah.
2
00:00:29,904 --> 00:00:32,031
WOMAN". Oh, you're so good.
3
00:00:32,114 --> 00:00:35,367
Oh, yes. I am the best, baby.
4
00:00:35,451 --> 00:00:37,786
Oh, yeah!
Oh. Oh, that was a tit.
5
00:00:37,870 --> 00:00:40,247
That is a tit! Yes!
6
00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:42,291
Oh, you're so big!
7
00:00:42,375 --> 00:00:44,668
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's right, baby.
8
00:00:44,794 --> 00:00:47,671
Oh, doggie wants to
Yes!
9
00:00:47,755 --> 00:00:49,673
Oh, yeah!
I'm bone smuggling, baby.
10
00:00:49,757 --> 00:00:51,842
Man, would you shut up?
11
00:00:51,926 --> 00:00:54,345
Hey, Jimmy. Just wanted
to say sweet dreams.
12
00:00:54,428 --> 00:00:56,346
Yeah, yeah. Sweet dreams.
Good night, Mom.
13
00:00:56,430 --> 00:00:58,306
Kiss good night.
14
00:00:59,767 --> 00:01:01,685
Something wrong
with the reception?
15
00:01:01,769 --> 00:01:03,061
Yeah. Yeah.
16
00:01:03,145 --> 00:01:04,312
There's this nature show...
17
00:01:04,397 --> 00:01:05,731
Take it off.
...that I'm trying to watch.
18
00:01:05,815 --> 00:01:07,483
And the birds
are all scrambled
19
00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:09,652
and I can't even...
Do me! Yes!
20
00:01:09,777 --> 00:01:12,321
Baby! Ride me like a
pony!
21
00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:13,948
The thing must be broken
22
00:01:14,031 --> 00:01:16,241
or I sat on the remote
or something.
23
00:01:16,325 --> 00:01:17,492
Getting ready for bed, Son?
24
00:01:17,618 --> 00:01:18,744
Yup, I'm all set, Dad.
I'm all set.
25
00:01:18,828 --> 00:01:19,870
Yeah?
No! No, I think
26
00:01:19,954 --> 00:01:21,914
he's tried to watch
some illegal channels here.
27
00:01:21,998 --> 00:01:23,416
Illegal...
Illegal channels?
28
00:01:23,499 --> 00:01:24,958
This is just
bad reception, honey.
29
00:01:25,042 --> 00:01:27,044
Oh, spank my hairy ass!
What's that?
30
00:01:27,128 --> 00:01:28,337
WOMAN". on, baby!
31
00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:30,923
You know what? Here.
Just give me this, please...
32
00:01:31,007 --> 00:01:33,801
Oh, my God!
And let's get this...
33
00:01:33,884 --> 00:01:37,846
Okay, okay. Let's... What the
hell's the matter with this thing?
34
00:01:37,930 --> 00:01:39,181
Yes!
35
00:01:49,900 --> 00:01:52,277
Illegal channels? Shit!
36
00:01:52,361 --> 00:01:55,614
If there's any channel that should be
illegal, it's that "all-woman's" channel.
37
00:01:55,740 --> 00:01:59,326
Yeah. Lifetime supply of
pantyhose or some shit.
38
00:01:59,410 --> 00:02:02,121
Hey, did you see The Little
Mermaid on TV the other night?
39
00:02:02,204 --> 00:02:04,915
No.
Ariel, man. She's so hot!
40
00:02:04,999 --> 00:02:06,583
She's a mermaid, dude.
41
00:02:06,667 --> 00:02:08,960
Yeah, Oz.
But not when she's on land.
42
00:02:09,045 --> 00:02:12,965
Come on, Vicky, it's Stifler's
party. We got to go. It'll be great.
43
00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:17,303
Why? All that happens at Stifler's
parties is people get drunk and do it.
44
00:02:17,386 --> 00:02:18,678
Yeah.
45
00:02:18,763 --> 00:02:20,681
Now, come on, Kevin.
Open it.
46
00:02:20,765 --> 00:02:24,059
It's a big, thick envelope,
Vicky. You got in.
47
00:02:24,143 --> 00:02:26,145
If you think so,
just open it.
48
00:02:26,228 --> 00:02:27,270
Fine.
49
00:02:35,279 --> 00:02:38,991
"Dear Miss Latham, we're sorry but
after keeping you on the waiting list
50
00:02:39,075 --> 00:02:43,079
"for the past couple of months, we've
decided that you are now rejected."
51
00:02:43,162 --> 00:02:45,038
Shut up!
52
00:02:45,122 --> 00:02:46,331
You got in.
53
00:02:46,415 --> 00:02:49,042
Yes! I love you!
54
00:02:50,586 --> 00:02:51,712
Okay.
55
00:02:59,428 --> 00:03:01,638
Hey, you think I should wear
this shirt to Stifler's party?
56
00:03:01,722 --> 00:03:03,849
You've worn that shirt for,
like, three days in a row, man!
57
00:03:03,933 --> 00:03:05,893
Guys. She said it.
58
00:03:05,976 --> 00:03:07,185
Said what?
59
00:03:07,269 --> 00:03:08,520
She said she loves me.
60
00:03:08,604 --> 00:03:10,856
Holy shit, dude! The
"L" word? Oh, man!
61
00:03:10,940 --> 00:03:13,359
Cornell's not that far
from U of M.
62
00:03:13,442 --> 00:03:15,193
Yeah, it's only, like,
seven hours.
63
00:03:15,277 --> 00:03:17,028
Oh, and you get to
drive across Canada.
64
00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:18,864
Beautiful country.
65
00:03:18,948 --> 00:03:21,241
Whatever. It's doable.
66
00:03:22,284 --> 00:03:24,577
What we should do today,
in band.
67
00:03:24,662 --> 00:03:28,499
Instead of playing our instruments
regularly, we should play them backwards.
68
00:03:28,582 --> 00:03:30,792
That'll be so funny!
Yeah.
69
00:03:35,464 --> 00:03:36,840
No offense,
but you're talking about
70
00:03:36,924 --> 00:03:39,927
a post-high school,
long-distance relationship.
71
00:03:40,010 --> 00:03:42,012
And you and Kevin
haven't even done it yet.
72
00:03:42,096 --> 00:03:43,722
That's not why
we're going out.
73
00:03:43,806 --> 00:03:47,392
What do you expect him to drive
to Cornell for? Milk and cookies?
74
00:03:47,476 --> 00:03:50,061
We're gonna have sex when
he's ready and I'm ready.
75
00:03:50,146 --> 00:03:52,022
It's got to be
completely perfect.
76
00:03:52,106 --> 00:03:54,733
I want the right time, the
right moment, the right place...
77
00:03:54,817 --> 00:03:57,986
Vicky, it's not a space
shuttle launch. It's sex.
78
00:04:02,283 --> 00:04:04,451
Finch. Here's the
man we are looking for.
79
00:04:04,535 --> 00:04:06,495
Gentlemen.
What's going on, buddy?
80
00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:07,997
Same old.
81
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:09,831
Finch.
You got the Latin homework?
82
00:04:09,915 --> 00:04:11,249
Oh.
83
00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:18,423
It means, "My dog ate it."
It's Latin. It's a joke.
84
00:04:18,507 --> 00:04:22,594
It's a Latin joke. Yeah,
Latin. Just drink your coffee.
85
00:04:22,678 --> 00:04:24,262
You know, Jim,
it's mochaccino.
86
00:04:24,346 --> 00:04:25,347
What?
87
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:27,766
What I'm drinking, it's
mochaccino. It's not coffee.
88
00:04:27,850 --> 00:04:29,059
'Nova!
89
00:04:30,686 --> 00:04:31,853
What's up, dude?
90
00:04:31,937 --> 00:04:34,230
You coming to the party
tonight, Ozzie, you fuck face?
91
00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:36,400
Depends if my date
wants to stop by.
92
00:04:36,484 --> 00:04:37,735
I'm working
on something new.
93
00:04:37,818 --> 00:04:39,986
I got an idea
about something new.
94
00:04:40,070 --> 00:04:42,238
How about you guys
actually locate your dicks,
95
00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:45,117
remove the shrink-wrap
and fucking use them!
96
00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:48,829
Dude, it's gonna happen.
She's a college chick.
97
00:04:48,913 --> 00:04:51,290
Oh, right.
I'll see you guys tonight.
98
00:04:51,373 --> 00:04:54,376
I'll look for you
in the no-fucking section.
99
00:04:58,547 --> 00:05:02,634
All right. I'm shooting for a
00 ETA, beer in hand by five after.
100
00:05:02,718 --> 00:05:04,219
Breath check.
101
00:05:06,347 --> 00:05:07,723
Thank you.
102
00:05:15,606 --> 00:05:16,898
I wish
you wouldn't do that.
103
00:05:16,982 --> 00:05:18,984
So, you got something up
your sleeve for tonight?
104
00:05:19,068 --> 00:05:21,403
This is a foolproof plan,
my friend.
105
00:05:21,487 --> 00:05:23,989
I have a serious question
to ask you guys. Okay.
106
00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:27,284
You know Nadia the Czechoslovakian
chick? She might be there tonight.
107
00:05:27,368 --> 00:05:29,995
Now, do you think
she would prefer
108
00:05:32,414 --> 00:05:34,499
laid-back Jim, or
109
00:05:38,170 --> 00:05:39,504
cool, hip Jim?
110
00:05:39,588 --> 00:05:41,923
I don't think it really matters
with that shirt you're wearing.
111
00:05:42,007 --> 00:05:45,135
What? Correct me if I'm wrong
but you're the one with the girlfriend
112
00:05:45,219 --> 00:05:46,970
and you're still
stranded on third base.
113
00:05:47,054 --> 00:05:49,848
Hey, at least I know what
third base feels like, okay?
114
00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:51,350
You're still
just a bat boy.
115
00:05:51,433 --> 00:05:52,851
Batboy. Batboy.
116
00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:54,227
What are you
talking about?
117
00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:57,314
Guys,
118
00:05:57,398 --> 00:06:00,692
what exactly does
third base feel like?
119
00:06:00,776 --> 00:06:02,778
You wanna take this one?
120
00:06:04,238 --> 00:06:06,490
Like warm apple pie.
121
00:06:06,574 --> 00:06:08,200
Yeah?
Yeah.
122
00:06:08,284 --> 00:06:11,537
Apple pie, huh?
Uh-huh.
123
00:06:11,620 --> 00:06:14,289
McDonald's or homemade?
124
00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:17,125
Gentlemen, destiny awaits.
125
00:06:19,962 --> 00:06:23,048
It's been one week
since you looked at me
126
00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:25,050
Cooked your head to the side
and said, I'm angry
127
00:06:25,134 --> 00:06:28,262
That's number five and six
for the Stif-meister!
128
00:06:28,929 --> 00:06:30,513
Oh, yeah.
129
00:06:30,598 --> 00:06:32,433
Oops!
130
00:06:32,516 --> 00:06:35,101
Holy!
Hey!
131
00:06:35,185 --> 00:06:39,355
Nadia! Buenos dias.
Glad you could make it.
132
00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:41,525
I'll be back
for you later.
133
00:06:47,781 --> 00:06:50,074
Now the party's startin'!
How you doing?
134
00:06:50,159 --> 00:06:52,578
Welcome to Stifler's
Palace of Love, fellas.
135
00:06:52,661 --> 00:06:55,705
The keg's back there! Enjoy!
Yeah.
136
00:06:55,789 --> 00:06:59,042
Vicky, Jessica! Great to see
you. Glad you could make it.
137
00:06:59,126 --> 00:07:01,628
Haha, bitches!
138
00:07:01,712 --> 00:07:03,422
Sherman!
139
00:07:03,505 --> 00:07:05,965
What the fuck
are you doing here?
140
00:07:09,845 --> 00:07:12,389
Fellas! What's going on?
141
00:07:12,473 --> 00:07:15,809
Sherman. Not much.
Just scoping the babes.
142
00:07:15,893 --> 00:07:19,771
Indeed!
Some fine ladies here, boys.
143
00:07:19,855 --> 00:07:23,108
Confidence is high.
Repeat. Confidence is high.
144
00:07:23,192 --> 00:07:25,611
Sherman is moving
to DEFCON 2.
145
00:07:25,694 --> 00:07:28,279
Full strategic arsenal
ready for deployment.
146
00:07:28,364 --> 00:07:29,365
Hey!
147
00:07:29,448 --> 00:07:31,116
You have something
going tonight, Sherman?
148
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:34,077
You see that Central chick,
Bernette?
149
00:07:34,161 --> 00:07:35,245
NO- No.
150
00:07:35,329 --> 00:07:38,415
She's around. Seems
she's taken a liking to me.
151
00:07:39,124 --> 00:07:43,461
Fellas, it's time she
experienced the Sherminator.
152
00:07:43,545 --> 00:07:45,797
Yeah, okay, Sherman.
Whatever.
153
00:07:45,881 --> 00:07:49,843
I'm a sophisticated sex robot
sent back through time
154
00:07:49,927 --> 00:07:53,722
to change the future
for one lucky lady.
155
00:07:53,806 --> 00:07:55,307
Go get them, tiger.
156
00:07:59,228 --> 00:08:01,188
Hopeless.
Completely.
157
00:08:01,271 --> 00:08:03,398
Hey, Vic.
Hi.
158
00:08:03,482 --> 00:08:06,610
Oh, shit. Guys, guys.
159
00:08:06,694 --> 00:08:09,905
There's Nadia and
she just looked at me.
160
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,156
She just looked at me.
161
00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,992
Well, why don't you
go talk to her?
162
00:08:14,076 --> 00:08:16,203
Yeah.
163
00:08:16,286 --> 00:08:19,497
Yeah, you're
right, Kev. I should just go talk to her.
164
00:08:21,083 --> 00:08:23,877
Yeah, I could do that. Sure.
165
00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:25,087
Sure.
166
00:08:27,339 --> 00:08:30,258
Kev? Kev?
167
00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:40,811
Yeah. Yeah.
168
00:08:43,731 --> 00:08:48,231
At last
169
00:08:51,488 --> 00:08:54,032
My love
170
00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:57,369
Has come along
171
00:08:59,580 --> 00:09:04,080
My lonely days are over
172
00:09:06,420 --> 00:09:08,255
That's great!
173
00:09:08,338 --> 00:09:12,133
And life is like a song
174
00:09:16,096 --> 00:09:18,556
Oh, yeah, yeah
175
00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:20,892
At last
176
00:09:22,311 --> 00:09:24,104
See you later.
177
00:09:24,188 --> 00:09:26,356
The stars above
178
00:09:32,154 --> 00:09:34,656
We're here for the party.
179
00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:37,492
What party?
There's no party.
180
00:09:42,498 --> 00:09:46,793
Weird. Try the house
down the street.
181
00:09:51,006 --> 00:09:53,591
So, what's your major?
182
00:09:53,675 --> 00:09:55,718
Post-modern
feminist thought.
183
00:09:55,803 --> 00:09:59,765
Oh, cool.
Great night, isn't it?
184
00:09:59,848 --> 00:10:00,974
Sure.
185
00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:07,018
Yeah, it's just something about the
springtime that's just cool, you know?
186
00:10:08,023 --> 00:10:11,234
Like the smell of fresh rain
or something.
187
00:10:11,318 --> 00:10:12,402
Mmm.
188
00:10:13,445 --> 00:10:15,864
Suck me, beautiful.
189
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,616
What did you just say?
190
00:10:17,699 --> 00:10:18,908
Suck me, beautiful.
191
00:10:21,703 --> 00:10:26,203
My friends call me "'Nova,"
as in Casanova.
192
00:10:26,625 --> 00:10:28,251
That's pathetic.
193
00:10:30,295 --> 00:10:31,921
Jeez, you don't have
to laugh at me.
194
00:10:32,005 --> 00:10:34,465
Well, there's just some things
you need to learn, that's all.
195
00:10:34,550 --> 00:10:37,177
Like what? Well, you've
got to tone it down.
196
00:10:37,261 --> 00:10:39,221
You don't need to come
to a place like Lookout Point
197
00:10:39,304 --> 00:10:42,140
and spout off cheese
ball lines to be romantic.
198
00:10:42,224 --> 00:10:43,433
Okay.
199
00:10:43,517 --> 00:10:45,602
You have to pay
attention to a girl.
200
00:10:45,686 --> 00:10:49,940
Be sensitive to her feelings.
Relationships are reciprocal.
201
00:10:50,023 --> 00:10:53,526
Come on, Casanova. I'll
take you back to your friends.
202
00:10:59,199 --> 00:11:03,494
Vicky, think it's time to take
the next step in our relationship?
203
00:11:03,579 --> 00:11:04,663
Tonight?
204
00:11:04,746 --> 00:11:07,081
Yeah, it's such
a perfect evening.
205
00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:09,835
I mean, it's how you've
always pictured it, isn't it?
206
00:11:09,918 --> 00:11:12,128
Man, my farts
fucking stink!
207
00:11:12,212 --> 00:11:15,506
Dude, you gotta take
a shit! You smell like a yeti!
208
00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:17,759
Or not.
209
00:11:19,219 --> 00:11:20,595
Just relax.
210
00:11:25,100 --> 00:11:27,060
You actually said that?
211
00:11:29,104 --> 00:11:31,022
Shut up!
212
00:11:31,106 --> 00:11:32,941
You did a hell of a lot
better than I did with Nadia.
213
00:11:33,025 --> 00:11:36,194
Oh, thanks, Jim, that's
great. That's really reassuring.
214
00:11:36,278 --> 00:11:38,863
Hey, no problem, 'Nova.
215
00:11:38,947 --> 00:11:42,742
Hey, don't call me 'Nova
anymore. I'm a... I'm a fraud.
216
00:11:42,826 --> 00:11:45,328
You guys are pathetic.
217
00:11:45,412 --> 00:11:48,331
I'm gonna find myself
a little hottie.
218
00:11:48,415 --> 00:11:51,793
"Suck me, beautiful!"
219
00:11:57,257 --> 00:11:58,216
Let me know.
220
00:11:58,300 --> 00:11:59,384
Okay.
221
00:11:59,468 --> 00:12:00,844
Keep going.
222
00:12:01,970 --> 00:12:04,639
I should be able
to talk to girls.
223
00:12:04,723 --> 00:12:06,891
I'm articulate.
224
00:12:06,975 --> 00:12:09,352
You know, I got a 720
on my SAT verbal.
225
00:12:09,436 --> 00:12:11,521
Bullshit.
There's no way.
226
00:12:11,605 --> 00:12:14,316
I kid you not, man.
Look. Listen.
227
00:12:15,734 --> 00:12:19,070
Copious. Verisimilitude.
228
00:12:19,988 --> 00:12:22,949
Oh, oh. Now.
229
00:12:33,961 --> 00:12:36,171
Suck me, beautiful!
230
00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:37,256
Damn it, Stifler.
231
00:12:37,339 --> 00:12:38,590
Checkout time!
232
00:12:38,674 --> 00:12:40,592
Please, vacate the room.
233
00:12:40,676 --> 00:12:42,761
You are such a jerk.
234
00:12:48,183 --> 00:12:51,060
God, I can't believe how many
cool people are at this party.
235
00:12:51,144 --> 00:12:52,228
Yup.
236
00:12:54,898 --> 00:12:56,941
And you got a keg too!
237
00:12:57,025 --> 00:12:58,067
Wow!
238
00:12:58,151 --> 00:12:59,485
Indeed.
239
00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:07,911
Oh, wait.
I left my beer downstairs.
240
00:13:07,995 --> 00:13:09,746
No. No. Here, babe!
241
00:13:12,582 --> 00:13:13,958
Thanks.
242
00:13:14,042 --> 00:13:17,045
You're really beautiful. Oh.
243
00:13:17,129 --> 00:13:19,005
Really?
244
00:13:19,089 --> 00:13:20,215
Oh, yeah.
245
00:13:35,397 --> 00:13:38,817
You know what? I don't
know if I want to be doing this.
246
00:13:38,900 --> 00:13:40,026
Doing what?
247
00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:43,029
You know, like,
if we hook up tonight,
248
00:13:43,113 --> 00:13:47,613
tomorrow I'll just be some girl
you go telling all your friends about.
249
00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:49,327
No way!
250
00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:53,498
Steve, you could at least
look at me when you say that!
251
00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:56,418
Look. Sarah,
252
00:13:57,169 --> 00:14:01,256
I wouldn't go telling stories
or anything about you.
253
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:05,840
I promise. So, just relax,
254
00:14:05,927 --> 00:14:09,764
take it slow and
let the good times roll.
255
00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:13,351
Okay.
256
00:14:13,435 --> 00:14:14,686
All right.
257
00:14:22,444 --> 00:14:23,945
What's wrong?
258
00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:28,450
What's wrong?
What is it?
259
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:33,246
Xenophobic.
260
00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:34,664
Oh!
261
00:14:40,921 --> 00:14:41,963
Regurgitation.
262
00:14:42,047 --> 00:14:43,298
I know that one.
263
00:14:44,716 --> 00:14:45,842
Kevin likes it.
264
00:14:45,926 --> 00:14:47,886
He likes getting head.
265
00:14:47,969 --> 00:14:50,471
Gee, what a total shocker.
What about you, Vicky?
266
00:14:50,555 --> 00:14:52,932
I mean, have you just
never had one with Kevin,
267
00:14:53,016 --> 00:14:55,059
or have you never had one,
perlod?
268
00:14:55,143 --> 00:14:57,645
I've had one.
269
00:14:57,729 --> 00:14:59,689
Okay.
I think.
270
00:14:59,773 --> 00:15:03,568
That's a no. No wonder
you're not psyched about sex.
271
00:15:03,652 --> 00:15:05,695
You tell me you never
even had one manually?
272
00:15:05,779 --> 00:15:07,113
I've never tried it.
273
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:09,032
You've never
double-clicked your mouse?
274
00:15:10,325 --> 00:15:12,577
Ha-ha, nice!
275
00:15:12,661 --> 00:15:15,580
Jesus! Stifler,
how much did you drink, man?
276
00:15:15,664 --> 00:15:18,750
Hey, Stifler?
How's the pale ale?
277
00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:20,418
FUCK you!
278
00:15:23,755 --> 00:15:25,256
That's Stifler's mom?
279
00:15:25,340 --> 00:15:26,924
Yup.
280
00:15:27,008 --> 00:15:31,508
Shit. I cannot believe a fine woman
like this produced a guy like Stifler.
281
00:15:32,013 --> 00:15:34,598
Dude, that chick's a MILF.
282
00:15:34,683 --> 00:15:36,059
What the hell is that?
283
00:15:36,143 --> 00:15:39,062
M-I-L-F.
Mom I'd like to fuck.
284
00:15:39,146 --> 00:15:40,647
Yeah, dude!
285
00:15:40,730 --> 00:15:42,481
Oh, ho, yeah!
286
00:15:42,566 --> 00:15:43,942
Yeah! MILF! MILF!
Yeah! MILF! MILF!
287
00:15:44,025 --> 00:15:45,818
Hey, guys. Guys. Guys.
288
00:15:45,902 --> 00:15:47,153
Come here.
289
00:15:47,237 --> 00:15:49,280
Sherman, what's going on?
290
00:15:49,364 --> 00:15:53,785
Yeah, don't you think you
fellas could try a little tact?
291
00:15:53,869 --> 00:15:56,621
I got company,
if you know what I mean?
292
00:15:59,749 --> 00:16:01,125
She's hot!
293
00:16:04,754 --> 00:16:09,175
If Sherman has sex before I
do, I'm gonna be really pissed.
294
00:16:10,051 --> 00:16:13,888
Sherman?
The Sherminator?
295
00:16:16,349 --> 00:16:17,892
Come on, man.
296
00:16:20,061 --> 00:16:22,730
MILF! MILF!
MILF! MILF!
297
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:27,110
Dude,hey,dude. What
are you doing to her, dude?
298
00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:29,571
Oh, my God, bro. Dude.
299
00:16:30,989 --> 00:16:33,032
Enough of this
blow job bullshit.
300
00:16:33,116 --> 00:16:34,492
I gotta get laid already.
301
00:16:34,576 --> 00:16:37,537
That's nice.
Really, really nice.
302
00:16:37,621 --> 00:16:39,664
Can I have a ride?
Sure.
303
00:16:40,957 --> 00:16:43,042
Vicky, wait.
Not for you.
304
00:16:44,628 --> 00:16:47,881
Yeti! I am the Yeti!
305
00:16:57,224 --> 00:16:59,184
Good morning, gentlemen.
Finch.
306
00:16:59,267 --> 00:17:00,601
Where were you
last night, huh?
307
00:17:00,685 --> 00:17:02,436
What happened to that
foolproof plan of yours?
308
00:17:02,521 --> 00:17:07,021
Well, I was going for a fashionably-late
entrance and I was too late.
309
00:17:07,567 --> 00:17:09,110
So, no ladies left.
310
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:11,738
It was a very
special night, very special.
311
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:14,324
Guys. Guys.
312
00:17:17,244 --> 00:17:18,703
I'll never forget this.
313
00:17:18,787 --> 00:17:21,080
Oh, I'll never forget it,
either.
314
00:17:21,164 --> 00:17:22,665
Thank you.
315
00:17:25,919 --> 00:17:27,921
Well, bye.
316
00:17:29,548 --> 00:17:30,632
Bye.
317
00:17:33,885 --> 00:17:37,555
Fellas, say goodbye
to Chuck Sherman, the boy.
318
00:17:37,639 --> 00:17:40,350
I am now a man.
319
00:17:40,433 --> 00:17:42,726
I highly recommend
you join the club.
320
00:17:42,811 --> 00:17:47,311
We were doing the wild
thing all night. I'm exhausted.
321
00:17:48,149 --> 00:17:51,026
I don't get it. I mean, how
the hell did you do that?
322
00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:55,823
It was just my time.
It was just my time.
323
00:17:57,617 --> 00:17:59,660
Best of luck
to you boys.
324
00:18:02,330 --> 00:18:04,540
I cannot believe this.
Come on, guys.
325
00:18:04,624 --> 00:18:07,335
You know, we should
be happy for Sherman.
326
00:18:10,338 --> 00:18:12,048
No, we shouldn't be.
327
00:18:12,132 --> 00:18:14,592
You know, I put in months
of quality time with Vicky.
328
00:18:14,676 --> 00:18:17,595
Sherman meets a chick
for one night and scores.
329
00:18:17,679 --> 00:18:18,680
This is just wrong.
330
00:18:18,763 --> 00:18:20,431
No shit.
331
00:18:20,515 --> 00:18:23,518
How the hell am I supposed
to become Mr. Sensitive Man?
332
00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:27,439
You know, we're all gonna go to college
as virgins. You realize this, right?
333
00:18:27,522 --> 00:18:30,107
I mean, they probably have
special dorms for people like us.
334
00:18:30,191 --> 00:18:34,691
All right. I got an idea. But
it's got to stay between us.
335
00:18:35,196 --> 00:18:37,489
It's really simple. We just
got to make an agreement.
336
00:18:37,574 --> 00:18:40,451
No. It's more than
an agreement.
337
00:18:40,535 --> 00:18:42,036
What? A bet?
A pact.
338
00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:44,622
No money involved. More
important than any bet.
339
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:48,209
Here's the deal. We all
get laid before we graduate.
340
00:18:49,753 --> 00:18:52,756
Dude, it's not like I haven't
been trying to get laid.
341
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:54,424
Think about when
you work out, Oz.
342
00:18:54,507 --> 00:18:55,925
You gotta have
someone there, right?
343
00:18:56,009 --> 00:18:58,970
Someone to spot you.
Someone to keep you motivated.
344
00:18:59,054 --> 00:19:01,306
Well, that's exactly what
we can do for each other.
345
00:19:01,389 --> 00:19:03,808
I mean, we'll be there
to keep each other on track.
346
00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:06,019
Separately, we are flawed
and vulnerable, but together,
347
00:19:06,102 --> 00:19:08,479
we are the masters
of our sexual destiny.
348
00:19:10,899 --> 00:19:12,400
But our dragon-style
will defeat it.
349
00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:14,068
Guys!
The Shaolin masters
350
00:19:14,152 --> 00:19:16,154
from East and West
must unite!
351
00:19:16,237 --> 00:19:18,614
Fight, and find out who
is number one. Guys!
352
00:19:18,698 --> 00:19:20,991
Come on. You're
ruining my moment here.
353
00:19:21,076 --> 00:19:23,787
This is our
very manhood at stake.
354
00:19:23,870 --> 00:19:26,414
We must make a stand,
here and now.
355
00:19:27,415 --> 00:19:31,085
No longer will our penises
remain flaccid and unused!
356
00:19:31,169 --> 00:19:35,256
We will fight for every man out there
who isn't getting laid and should be.
357
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:38,885
This is our day.
This is our time.
358
00:19:38,968 --> 00:19:43,180
And, by God, we will not stand by and
watch history condemn us into celibacy.
359
00:19:43,264 --> 00:19:44,848
Amen. Yes.
I like that.
360
00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:48,853
We will make a stand. We
will succeed. About time!
361
00:19:48,937 --> 00:19:51,022
We will get laid!
362
00:19:51,106 --> 00:19:52,232
Yeah!
363
00:19:54,150 --> 00:19:57,403
Now, the sex. It's got to
be valid, consensual sex.
364
00:19:57,487 --> 00:20:00,615
No prostitutes. That's
what you're thinking, Finch.
365
00:20:01,449 --> 00:20:02,992
Busted.
366
00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:05,828
So, basically,
prom is our last chance.
367
00:20:05,912 --> 00:20:08,372
Oh, dude. Prom sucks.
I know,
368
00:20:08,456 --> 00:20:10,458
but you gotta
think about it this way.
369
00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:12,085
I mean,
all the parties afterwards?
370
00:20:12,168 --> 00:20:13,794
The chicks are going to
want to do it.
371
00:20:13,878 --> 00:20:17,381
Yeah, yeah, he's right. It's,
like, tradition or something.
372
00:20:17,465 --> 00:20:18,799
The Rose Bowl.
373
00:20:18,883 --> 00:20:20,509
So, that gives us...
374
00:20:20,593 --> 00:20:22,678
Exactly three weeks
to the day.
375
00:20:24,806 --> 00:20:27,099
We're gonna do this.
All right, to the next step!
376
00:20:27,183 --> 00:20:29,059
Next step!
Next step!
377
00:20:31,104 --> 00:20:35,604
I have visions I was in them
I was looking into the mirror
378
00:20:35,942 --> 00:20:38,819
To see a little
bit clearer
379
00:20:38,903 --> 00:20:41,655
The rottenness
and evil in me
380
00:20:43,825 --> 00:20:48,325
Fingertips have memories Mine
can't forget the curves of your body
381
00:20:48,496 --> 00:20:51,874
And when
I feel a bit naughty
382
00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:54,711
I run it up the flagpole
and see
383
00:20:54,794 --> 00:20:57,880
Who salutes
but no one ever does
384
00:20:57,964 --> 00:21:02,464
I'm not sick,
but I'm not well
385
00:21:02,635 --> 00:21:05,929
And I'm so hot
386
00:21:06,014 --> 00:21:08,975
'Cause I'm in hell
387
00:21:10,143 --> 00:21:14,643
Been around the world and found
that only stupid people are breeding
388
00:21:15,356 --> 00:21:19,318
The cretins cloning and
feeding and I don't even own a TV
389
00:21:19,402 --> 00:21:21,028
Well, did you get
the flowers?
390
00:21:23,364 --> 00:21:25,908
Hear the voices in my head,
I swear to God
391
00:21:25,992 --> 00:21:28,786
It sounds like
they're snoring
392
00:21:28,870 --> 00:21:31,372
But if you're bored,
then you're boring
393
00:21:31,956 --> 00:21:34,541
The agony and the irony
394
00:21:34,626 --> 00:21:37,670
They're killing me, whoa!
395
00:21:37,754 --> 00:21:42,133
I'm not sick,
but I'm not well
396
00:21:42,217 --> 00:21:45,595
And I'm so hot
397
00:21:45,678 --> 00:21:48,055
'Cause I'm in hell
398
00:21:49,766 --> 00:21:51,768
Don't worry. You'll get
her back soon enough.
399
00:21:51,851 --> 00:21:53,936
You think so?
Sure, she likes you.
400
00:21:54,020 --> 00:21:55,604
Well, I like her too.
401
00:21:55,688 --> 00:21:57,439
Do you love her?
402
00:21:57,524 --> 00:22:00,318
You know what? You
can't really ask me that.
403
00:22:00,401 --> 00:22:03,570
Well, if you want to get her in the
sack, I mean, just tell her you love her.
404
00:22:03,655 --> 00:22:05,114
That's how I was duped.
405
00:22:05,198 --> 00:22:06,449
Look, Jessica,
406
00:22:06,533 --> 00:22:08,576
I don't want to dupe her.
407
00:22:10,370 --> 00:22:14,457
All right. What you need to do is
learn how to press a girl's buttons.
408
00:22:14,541 --> 00:22:16,251
You have to give her
what she's never had.
409
00:22:16,334 --> 00:22:17,752
What's that?
410
00:22:17,961 --> 00:22:19,587
Let me give you a hint.
411
00:22:20,505 --> 00:22:23,799
Oh, Kev! Yeah.
412
00:22:24,592 --> 00:22:27,261
Comprende?
You mean an orgasm.
413
00:22:27,345 --> 00:22:29,597
You got it, stud!
Well, you know,
414
00:22:29,681 --> 00:22:31,724
I'm... I'm pretty sure
that I've given her a...
415
00:22:31,808 --> 00:22:33,684
No, you haven't.
416
00:22:33,768 --> 00:22:36,520
Well, there was one time...
No.
417
00:22:37,897 --> 00:22:38,898
Oh, man.
418
00:22:38,982 --> 00:22:40,233
Look, kid, it's up to you.
419
00:22:40,316 --> 00:22:43,277
The big L or the big O.
420
00:22:43,778 --> 00:22:45,070
Dickhead!
421
00:22:45,488 --> 00:22:47,573
You gotta see this.
422
00:22:47,657 --> 00:22:49,450
Do you believe in magic
423
00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:50,868
In a young girl's heart
424
00:22:50,952 --> 00:22:54,455
How the music can free her
whenever it starts
425
00:22:54,581 --> 00:22:58,334
And it's magic
if the music is groovy
426
00:22:58,418 --> 00:22:59,961
It makes you feel happy
427
00:23:00,044 --> 00:23:01,837
What did you cocks
do to him?
428
00:23:01,921 --> 00:23:04,673
I'll tell you about the
magic It'll free your soul
429
00:23:04,757 --> 00:23:09,257
But it's like trying to tell a
stranger 'bout rock 'n' roll
430
00:23:09,387 --> 00:23:11,430
Great. See you next time.
431
00:23:16,019 --> 00:23:17,937
Hey, guys.
Came to watch me in action?
432
00:23:18,021 --> 00:23:19,063
Yeah.
433
00:23:19,147 --> 00:23:20,565
I think you sounded
pretty good.
434
00:23:20,648 --> 00:23:21,774
Yeah, man.
435
00:23:21,858 --> 00:23:23,943
I think you need
your balls reattached.
436
00:23:24,027 --> 00:23:25,445
Hey, keep it down, dude.
437
00:23:25,528 --> 00:23:26,987
What the fuck
are you doing here?
438
00:23:27,071 --> 00:23:29,698
This place is an
untapped resource.
439
00:23:29,782 --> 00:23:31,116
I mean, check it out.
440
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:33,410
These vocal jazz girls
are hot.
441
00:23:33,494 --> 00:23:36,330
Why the hell is he
joining jazz choir so late?
442
00:23:36,414 --> 00:23:39,875
Maybe he's preparing for
another senior year at East?
443
00:23:40,335 --> 00:23:42,712
You guys,
we don't even know him.
444
00:23:46,382 --> 00:23:47,883
You dipshit!
445
00:23:47,967 --> 00:23:51,720
You're expecting to score with
some goody-goody choir girl pries?
446
00:23:51,804 --> 00:23:56,304
These chicks don't know me. I can
work the sensitive angle here, fellas!
447
00:23:56,476 --> 00:23:58,895
You know, it's just like
that college chick told me.
448
00:23:58,978 --> 00:24:01,939
All that you gotta do
is just ask them questions
449
00:24:02,023 --> 00:24:04,316
and listen to what
they have to say and shit.
450
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:07,653
I don't know, man. That
sounds like a lot of work!
451
00:24:12,033 --> 00:24:13,576
Just a second!
452
00:24:18,539 --> 00:24:20,874
Come in. Come in.
453
00:24:20,959 --> 00:24:22,710
Oh, Jim, you're here.
454
00:24:22,794 --> 00:24:26,631
I was just walking by
your room and...
455
00:24:26,714 --> 00:24:28,799
And, you know,
I was thinking,
456
00:24:28,883 --> 00:24:33,220
"Boy, it's been a long time since
we've had a little father-son chat."
457
00:24:34,639 --> 00:24:38,726
Oh! I almost forgot.
I... I bought some magazines.
458
00:24:39,769 --> 00:24:42,772
Do you want to just flip
to the center section?
459
00:24:44,273 --> 00:24:46,984
Well, this is the...
This is the female form.
460
00:24:47,068 --> 00:24:50,071
And they have
focused on the breasts
461
00:24:50,154 --> 00:24:54,654
which are used primarily
to feed young infants
462
00:24:54,742 --> 00:24:58,078
and also in foreplay.
463
00:24:58,162 --> 00:24:59,288
Right.
464
00:24:59,372 --> 00:25:02,833
This is...
This is Hustler.
465
00:25:02,917 --> 00:25:06,587
And this is a much more
exotic magazine.
466
00:25:06,671 --> 00:25:11,171
Now, they have decided to
focus more on the pubic region...
467
00:25:11,551 --> 00:25:15,346
Right. Uh-huh.
...the whole groin area.
468
00:25:15,513 --> 00:25:17,515
Look at the expression
on her face.
469
00:25:17,598 --> 00:25:19,266
You see that?
See what she's doing?
470
00:25:19,684 --> 00:25:22,937
She's kind of looking
right into your eyes saying,
471
00:25:23,021 --> 00:25:26,315
"Hey, big boy.
Hey, how you doing?"
472
00:25:26,858 --> 00:25:28,442
You see?
Right.
473
00:25:30,945 --> 00:25:34,448
Shaved is a magazine
I'm not too familiar with,
474
00:25:34,532 --> 00:25:37,326
but, again,
if you flip to the center
475
00:25:39,287 --> 00:25:41,330
sectlon...
476
00:25:41,414 --> 00:25:45,209
Well, you see the detail that,
that they go into in this picture here.
477
00:25:45,293 --> 00:25:46,377
Yeah.
478
00:25:46,461 --> 00:25:49,422
It almost looks like
a tropical plant or some
479
00:25:49,505 --> 00:25:51,340
underwater thing.
Yeah. Yes.
480
00:25:51,466 --> 00:25:53,342
Do you know what a
clitoris is? Oh, my God.
481
00:25:53,468 --> 00:25:55,511
Well, don't say, "Oh..."
Yes, I know what a clitoris is.
482
00:25:55,595 --> 00:25:56,887
Oh, you do. Oh, I see.
Yes, you do.
483
00:25:56,971 --> 00:25:59,098
I forgot, you've been there
and back. You know everything.
484
00:25:59,182 --> 00:26:00,349
I've learned about it
in Sex Ed.
485
00:26:00,433 --> 00:26:01,892
I really don't need you
to talk about clitoris.
486
00:26:01,976 --> 00:26:03,102
I'm trying to
make this painless...
487
00:26:03,186 --> 00:26:05,354
You know what? I'm sorry.
Okay? I'm sorry.
488
00:26:05,438 --> 00:26:06,439
No, no, no.
489
00:26:06,522 --> 00:26:09,775
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
490
00:26:09,859 --> 00:26:11,235
I shouldn't have
got hot there.
491
00:26:11,319 --> 00:26:13,237
Well, you know what
I'm going to do, Jim.
492
00:26:13,321 --> 00:26:15,740
I'm going to just
leave these books here
493
00:26:15,823 --> 00:26:19,451
for you to peruse at your...
At your leisure.
494
00:26:20,411 --> 00:26:21,537
Wait!
495
00:26:27,627 --> 00:26:29,337
Well, safer than a tube sock.
496
00:26:31,964 --> 00:26:34,466
Okay, that... That
was good. Yeah.
497
00:26:37,470 --> 00:26:39,013
See you at dinner.
498
00:26:39,097 --> 00:26:40,807
Yeah. I'll see you at dinner.
499
00:26:41,808 --> 00:26:43,935
So, Finch,
this is your plan?
500
00:26:44,018 --> 00:26:47,146
You know, I don't think girls
are into the whole mini-golf thing.
501
00:26:47,230 --> 00:26:49,482
Kevin, I'm sure
that they're not.
502
00:26:49,565 --> 00:26:53,068
Actually, there is one small matter
that I need to ask for your cooperation in.
503
00:26:53,152 --> 00:26:54,695
In the spirit of this
whole pact, you know?
504
00:26:54,779 --> 00:26:55,905
Sure, what do you need?
505
00:26:55,988 --> 00:26:57,823
Whatever you hear about me,
you agree.
506
00:26:57,907 --> 00:26:59,783
And tell all the boys
the same thing.
507
00:26:59,867 --> 00:27:03,620
Look, I gotta go.
16 minutes round-trip.
508
00:27:03,704 --> 00:27:06,164
You know, Finch, it's,
it's senior year.
509
00:27:06,249 --> 00:27:09,293
I mean, don't you think it's time you
learned how to take a dump at school?
510
00:27:09,377 --> 00:27:12,088
When was the last time you
looked at the facilities in this school?
511
00:27:20,012 --> 00:27:21,805
Excuse me.
512
00:27:21,889 --> 00:27:23,473
That's Paul Finch, right?
513
00:27:23,558 --> 00:27:24,642
Yeah.
514
00:27:24,725 --> 00:27:27,644
Well, you've seen him
in the locker room, right?
515
00:27:27,728 --> 00:27:28,812
Yeah.
516
00:27:28,896 --> 00:27:32,232
So, my friends, they
want to know. Is it true?
517
00:27:32,316 --> 00:27:35,193
You know,
that he's equipped.
518
00:27:35,278 --> 00:27:38,489
I have no idea. Finch
showers with his bathing suit on.
519
00:27:38,573 --> 00:27:40,116
I mean...
520
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:44,786
As a matter of fact, it
is true. The guy's huge!
521
00:27:44,871 --> 00:27:46,330
Does he have a date
for the prom yet?
522
00:27:46,414 --> 00:27:48,165
No, definitely not.
523
00:27:48,249 --> 00:27:49,959
All right. Thanks.
524
00:27:51,127 --> 00:27:52,253
Oh, man!
525
00:27:54,172 --> 00:27:58,672
So I was thinking maybe you could
give me some advice, brother to brother.
526
00:27:59,427 --> 00:28:02,471
I thought you might know
a trick or something to make her...
527
00:28:02,555 --> 00:28:04,765
Orgasm?
Yeah.
528
00:28:05,433 --> 00:28:06,851
What's good here?
529
00:28:06,934 --> 00:28:08,560
Try the spicy tuna
hand roll. What?
530
00:28:09,103 --> 00:28:12,439
How do you do that? Hey, never
mind that. Listen, pay attention.
531
00:28:12,523 --> 00:28:15,484
Is that all that you're interested
in, trying to get your girl into bed?
532
00:28:15,568 --> 00:28:19,113
No, it'd be good to be able
to, you know, return the favor.
533
00:28:19,197 --> 00:28:21,699
Be nice to know she enjoys
things as much as I do.
534
00:28:21,782 --> 00:28:24,951
See that? That's good. That's what
I wanted to hear. Now, you qualify.
535
00:28:25,411 --> 00:28:26,620
Qualify for what?
536
00:28:26,704 --> 00:28:28,622
My man, you've just
inherited the Bible.
537
00:28:32,210 --> 00:28:34,670
It originally started
as a sex manual,
538
00:28:34,754 --> 00:28:37,423
this book that some guys
brought back from Amsterdam.
539
00:28:37,506 --> 00:28:40,884
And each year it got passed on to
one East student who was worthy.
540
00:28:40,968 --> 00:28:45,389
Now, it's full of all sorts of stuff
that guys have added over the years.
541
00:28:47,391 --> 00:28:51,603
But you have to keep it a secret
and return it at the end of the year.
542
00:28:51,687 --> 00:28:54,564
All right.
So now you know. Good luck.
543
00:29:02,907 --> 00:29:05,117
If you
believe in magic Magic
544
00:29:05,201 --> 00:29:09,701
Don't you bother to choose if it's
jug band music or rhythm and blues
545
00:29:10,289 --> 00:29:13,750
Just go and listen
It will start with a smile
546
00:29:13,834 --> 00:29:17,587
That won't wipe off your face
no matter how hard you try
547
00:29:17,672 --> 00:29:22,172
Your feet start tapping and you
can't seem to find, how you got there
548
00:29:23,177 --> 00:29:25,888
Do you believe in magic?
549
00:29:25,972 --> 00:29:30,472
Scooby-dooby doo bah
Scoo-Scooby-dooby Dooby-dooby doo bah
550
00:29:30,726 --> 00:29:32,853
Yeah, magic
551
00:29:33,521 --> 00:29:35,064
What was that?
552
00:29:36,357 --> 00:29:38,359
Sorry.
No, it was good.
553
00:29:41,028 --> 00:29:44,281
Well, it, uh...
It came from the heart.
554
00:29:44,365 --> 00:29:47,951
Well, keep it coming.
All right, people, good work!
555
00:29:48,035 --> 00:29:50,954
Now, don't forget. The state
competition's a couple of weeks away
556
00:29:51,038 --> 00:29:53,206
so keep on it, okay?
557
00:30:04,552 --> 00:30:06,095
Not bad, Chris.
558
00:30:07,263 --> 00:30:08,514
Really?
559
00:30:10,224 --> 00:30:13,227
Yeah.
Thanks, Heather, right?
560
00:30:14,103 --> 00:30:17,439
So, you've got this sort of
Frank Sinatra thing going on.
561
00:30:17,523 --> 00:30:21,693
Right. I feel like I've discovered
this whole new side of me.
562
00:30:21,777 --> 00:30:24,404
I mean,
music is so expressive.
563
00:30:25,448 --> 00:30:28,033
Okay. I mean, I agree, but,
564
00:30:28,117 --> 00:30:31,161
aren't you supposed to be out,
like, trying to decapitate someone
565
00:30:31,245 --> 00:30:32,829
with your lacrosse stick
or something?
566
00:30:32,913 --> 00:30:35,457
Oh, sure. Sure.
567
00:30:35,541 --> 00:30:37,668
You know, I know what
people think. It's like,
568
00:30:37,752 --> 00:30:40,504
"Oz, he's just this
kick-ass lacrosse player."
569
00:30:40,588 --> 00:30:43,382
You know, I also play football,
by the way, but that's, like,
570
00:30:43,466 --> 00:30:45,134
that's not all that I am,
you know?
571
00:30:45,217 --> 00:30:46,343
Of course, I didn't...
572
00:30:46,427 --> 00:30:50,927
I mean, it really bothers me when
people try to pigeonhole me like that.
573
00:30:51,474 --> 00:30:52,600
You'?
574
00:30:53,768 --> 00:30:55,770
You think
I don't get that?
575
00:30:55,853 --> 00:30:59,815
God, it's like just because I don't
get drunk and barf every weekend
576
00:30:59,899 --> 00:31:04,399
that people say, "Oh, look. There's
this goody two-shoes choir girl pries."
577
00:31:04,570 --> 00:31:07,781
Yeah. So, like,
what else do you do?
578
00:31:08,783 --> 00:31:12,119
Well, the same things you do,
579
00:31:12,203 --> 00:31:14,538
like hang out with friends
and stuff.
580
00:31:14,622 --> 00:31:15,706
Why? What do you think I do?
581
00:31:15,790 --> 00:31:16,999
Oh, I...
582
00:31:17,083 --> 00:31:20,127
I just realized that I don't
know anything about you.
583
00:31:20,211 --> 00:31:21,545
I was interested.
584
00:31:21,629 --> 00:31:25,174
Oh, well,
what do you want to know?
585
00:31:25,257 --> 00:31:28,134
You know, stuff, about you.
586
00:31:30,971 --> 00:31:32,347
All right.
587
00:31:34,934 --> 00:31:37,269
Mom, I'm home!
588
00:32:34,827 --> 00:32:37,120
Oh, yeah. Oh!
589
00:32:39,665 --> 00:32:43,293
Jim!
It's not what it looks like.
590
00:32:50,593 --> 00:32:54,805
Well, we'll just tell your
mother that, that we ate it all.
591
00:33:35,679 --> 00:33:38,431
Goal by
number eight, Chris Ostreicher.
592
00:33:41,769 --> 00:33:44,229
Nice game.
Nice game. Good game.
593
00:33:47,691 --> 00:33:50,443
Hey, what are you
doing here?
594
00:33:50,528 --> 00:33:54,073
Just enjoying my first
exhilarating lacrosse experience.
595
00:33:54,156 --> 00:33:56,741
You kicked butt.
Oh, thanks.
596
00:33:57,409 --> 00:34:00,078
Chris... Oh, you can
call me Oz, if you want.
597
00:34:00,162 --> 00:34:02,080
Do I have to?
You can call me Ostreicher.
598
00:34:02,164 --> 00:34:03,331
What's your middle name?
599
00:34:03,415 --> 00:34:04,582
No, forget it.
600
00:34:04,667 --> 00:34:06,085
Come on.
I won't tell anyone.
601
00:34:06,168 --> 00:34:08,086
Well, neither will I.
602
00:34:08,796 --> 00:34:09,922
Okay.
603
00:34:11,632 --> 00:34:15,427
So, I had this thought, and
604
00:34:15,511 --> 00:34:17,763
it may seem like
it's way out of left field.
605
00:34:17,846 --> 00:34:19,222
I don't know if you can,
606
00:34:19,306 --> 00:34:22,600
but since I'm not going with
anybody, I thought that maybe...
607
00:34:22,685 --> 00:34:25,312
Those guys sucked ass!
608
00:34:25,396 --> 00:34:28,232
Choir chick, what the
hell are you doing here?
609
00:34:28,315 --> 00:34:32,569
Well, I was
asking Chris to prom.
610
00:34:32,653 --> 00:34:34,363
So, do you want to go?
611
00:34:34,446 --> 00:34:37,824
Oh, yeah!
That would be great.
612
00:34:38,784 --> 00:34:41,286
Well, just don't expect Oz
to pay for the limo!
613
00:34:41,370 --> 00:34:44,247
Stifler, fuck! I mean...
614
00:34:45,416 --> 00:34:48,669
Why do you got to be
so insensitive all the time?
615
00:34:49,587 --> 00:34:50,713
What?
616
00:34:52,464 --> 00:34:55,758
Whatever. Look, don't forget.
My cottage after prom.
617
00:34:55,843 --> 00:34:57,511
On Lake Michigan.
618
00:34:59,346 --> 00:35:01,681
Hey, wait up, you pussies.
Where you going?
619
00:35:03,475 --> 00:35:05,810
Well, I gotta...
I gotta hit the showers now
620
00:35:05,894 --> 00:35:09,647
but I think this is gonna
be really, really good.
621
00:35:09,732 --> 00:35:12,276
Yeah. Me too.
622
00:35:12,359 --> 00:35:13,401
All right.
623
00:35:13,485 --> 00:35:15,653
Bye. Bye.
Bye.
624
00:35:21,702 --> 00:35:25,580
'Appening Oz!
Working with the choir chick?
625
00:35:25,664 --> 00:35:29,459
What do you say, fellas? I just dig
those cute little sweaters she wears.
626
00:35:29,543 --> 00:35:32,045
Nuts you do,
you little horn dog.
627
00:35:33,339 --> 00:35:36,342
Yeah! Yeah, baby!
628
00:35:36,425 --> 00:35:40,387
Spank me! Spank me!
Hit that high C.
629
00:35:46,435 --> 00:35:48,645
Come on!
What's going on here?
630
00:35:52,983 --> 00:35:55,652
I was being selfish
and majorly insensitive.
631
00:35:55,736 --> 00:35:58,488
I'm a... I'm a total idiot.
I mean, a fool, a buffoon.
632
00:35:58,572 --> 00:36:00,949
I think shithead
really says it.
633
00:36:01,033 --> 00:36:03,827
You know what? You're
right. I'm a shithead,
634
00:36:03,911 --> 00:36:05,787
and I want to
make it up to you.
635
00:36:05,871 --> 00:36:07,914
Oh, yeah? How?
636
00:36:10,334 --> 00:36:12,336
Oh, make me over
637
00:36:12,419 --> 00:36:14,879
Vicky.
Your parents are downstairs.
638
00:36:14,963 --> 00:36:16,381
Kevin, don't stop!
639
00:36:16,465 --> 00:36:17,757
Just a second.
640
00:36:17,841 --> 00:36:21,177
A walking study
641
00:36:21,261 --> 00:36:22,845
In demonology
642
00:36:23,180 --> 00:36:26,433
Hey, so glad
you could make it
643
00:36:26,517 --> 00:36:29,603
Yeah, now you really made it
644
00:36:32,147 --> 00:36:35,358
Hon, can you tell Vic
to come on down for supper?
645
00:36:36,443 --> 00:36:38,027
Holy shit!
646
00:36:38,112 --> 00:36:41,031
You know there's
no lock on your door?
647
00:36:47,538 --> 00:36:50,999
Oh! I'm coming! I'm coming!
648
00:36:55,087 --> 00:36:56,588
Oh, Jim!
Dad.
649
00:36:56,672 --> 00:37:00,133
Hi, I was just looking at the
old family portrait out here.
650
00:37:01,218 --> 00:37:03,303
Well, that was a fun day,
wasn't it?
651
00:37:03,387 --> 00:37:06,139
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
652
00:37:06,223 --> 00:37:09,643
Jim, I want to
talk about masturbation.
653
00:37:09,727 --> 00:37:14,227
Now, I just want you to know
that it's, it's a perfectly normal thing.
654
00:37:14,565 --> 00:37:16,483
And I have to admit,
you know,
655
00:37:16,567 --> 00:37:21,067
I did a fair bit of masturbating
when I was a little younger.
656
00:37:21,196 --> 00:37:24,991
I, I used to call it
"stroking the salami."
657
00:37:25,075 --> 00:37:28,495
Yeah, you know,
"pounding the ol' pud."
658
00:37:28,579 --> 00:37:31,456
I never did it
with baked goods.
659
00:37:31,540 --> 00:37:32,749
But you know
your Uncle Mort?
660
00:37:32,833 --> 00:37:35,418
He "pinched the one-eyed
snake" five, six times a day.
661
00:37:35,502 --> 00:37:39,589
See, it's like,
practice for the big game.
662
00:37:39,673 --> 00:37:43,051
You see?
It's like... It's like,
663
00:37:43,135 --> 00:37:46,263
banging a tennis ball
against a brick wall.
664
00:37:46,346 --> 00:37:50,350
Which can be fun. It can
be fun, but it's not a game.
665
00:37:50,434 --> 00:37:52,811
Right. No.
It's not a game.
666
00:37:52,895 --> 00:37:56,231
What you want is you want
a partner to return the ball.
667
00:37:56,315 --> 00:37:58,108
Do you want a partner?
668
00:37:58,192 --> 00:38:00,068
Yeah. Yeah,
yeah, I want a partner.
669
00:38:00,152 --> 00:38:01,987
You do want a partner?
Oh, I want a partner.
670
00:38:02,112 --> 00:38:04,864
You want a partner.
Good. Good. Of course.
671
00:38:06,575 --> 00:38:07,701
Good.
672
00:38:08,952 --> 00:38:11,704
So, once Hal
becomes king, he has to take on
673
00:38:11,789 --> 00:38:14,708
the responsibilities of
leadership and turn his back
674
00:38:14,792 --> 00:38:17,544
on his old,
drunken friend, Falstaff.
675
00:38:17,628 --> 00:38:21,923
You see, Hal is going through a
rite of passage, much like you all are.
676
00:38:22,007 --> 00:38:26,386
So make most of the time you've
got left together. You'll miss it later.
677
00:38:26,762 --> 00:38:28,889
So, does your tongue
cramp up?
678
00:38:28,972 --> 00:38:31,516
No. You get kind of
dizzy, though.
679
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:32,684
Wow.
680
00:38:32,768 --> 00:38:36,313
That's amazing. She's probably
gonna want to do it soon.
681
00:38:39,775 --> 00:38:41,902
All right.
Class dismissed.
682
00:38:44,738 --> 00:38:48,241
Still questing after
the Holy Grail, huh, guys?
683
00:38:52,913 --> 00:38:54,706
Hey, where's Finch?
684
00:38:54,790 --> 00:38:57,375
Oh, he went home
to take a shit.
685
00:38:57,459 --> 00:38:58,793
I don't get it.
I just don't.
686
00:38:58,877 --> 00:39:01,629
How does a guy like that
get this sudden reputation?
687
00:39:01,713 --> 00:39:03,131
What reputation?
688
00:39:03,215 --> 00:39:04,466
Observe.
689
00:39:05,259 --> 00:39:09,513
Excuse me. Do you
know who Paul Finch is?
690
00:39:09,596 --> 00:39:13,349
Yeah! He's the guy
with the tattoo, right?
691
00:39:13,433 --> 00:39:16,602
You know, the eagle and the
blazing fire and all that stuff.
692
00:39:18,063 --> 00:39:22,233
Well, if you guys see him later,
will you tell him Courtney says hi?
693
00:39:22,317 --> 00:39:23,401
Bye.
694
00:39:26,154 --> 00:39:28,573
Okay. Explain.
695
00:39:28,657 --> 00:39:29,783
I can't.
696
00:39:29,867 --> 00:39:31,827
I don't know how
he's doing it.
697
00:39:32,870 --> 00:39:35,247
I guess that
just leaves Jim trailing.
698
00:39:35,330 --> 00:39:37,790
Jimbo!
Better sack up, buddy!
699
00:39:37,875 --> 00:39:40,127
Yeah, I know.
I'm working on it, all right?
700
00:39:40,210 --> 00:39:41,502
James?
701
00:39:41,587 --> 00:39:44,798
You are very good in the
world history class, yes?
702
00:39:44,882 --> 00:39:47,676
Me? Yes. No...
703
00:39:47,759 --> 00:39:48,968
Yes, I am.
704
00:39:49,052 --> 00:39:51,512
Perhaps you could
help me with my studies.
705
00:39:52,556 --> 00:39:53,640
Yeah. Absolutely.
706
00:39:53,724 --> 00:39:55,934
That would
be... That would be great sometime.
707
00:39:56,018 --> 00:39:57,561
How about tomorrow?
708
00:39:57,644 --> 00:40:00,647
Well, I have
ballet practice.
709
00:40:00,731 --> 00:40:03,984
Perhaps, I could come
by your house afterwards?
710
00:40:04,067 --> 00:40:06,069
I could change clothes
at your place.
711
00:40:09,072 --> 00:40:11,741
Oh. Yeah.
712
00:40:11,825 --> 00:40:14,369
I suppose
that would be okay. Sure.
713
00:40:23,754 --> 00:40:25,046
Nice car!
714
00:40:26,131 --> 00:40:27,298
I'm glad you think so.
715
00:40:27,382 --> 00:40:28,674
You don't like it?
716
00:40:28,759 --> 00:40:32,053
No, I like the car. By the
way, though, about prom?
717
00:40:32,137 --> 00:40:35,348
That was a bad idea.
I'm sorry I invited you.
718
00:40:35,432 --> 00:40:36,808
What are you
talking about?
719
00:40:36,892 --> 00:40:38,351
Please.
720
00:40:38,435 --> 00:40:41,896
I asked you because I thought you
might actually be worth going with.
721
00:40:41,980 --> 00:40:45,191
But you are just a jock.
No, wait. You're a jerk.
722
00:40:46,401 --> 00:40:48,861
Wait! I don't understand.
723
00:40:48,946 --> 00:40:52,532
I saw you making fun of me
with your lacrosse buddies.
724
00:40:52,616 --> 00:40:53,950
Heather, I wasn't
making fun of you.
725
00:40:54,034 --> 00:40:56,619
Give me a break.
You're so full of it.
726
00:40:59,957 --> 00:41:01,500
Fuck me!
727
00:41:01,583 --> 00:41:05,336
There's gonna be an Eastern
European chick naked in your house.
728
00:41:05,420 --> 00:41:07,797
And you're not gonna
do anything about that?
729
00:41:07,881 --> 00:41:11,009
What am I gonna do, huh?
Broadcast her over the Internet?
730
00:41:11,927 --> 00:41:14,512
Yeah.
You can do that?
731
00:41:19,977 --> 00:41:22,104
No. I cannot
do that to her.
732
00:41:22,729 --> 00:41:25,648
Jim, get some
fucking balls.
733
00:41:26,149 --> 00:41:28,568
If you don't have the guts
to photograph a naked chick,
734
00:41:28,652 --> 00:41:30,487
how you gonna
sleep with one?
735
00:41:31,113 --> 00:41:33,281
I don't like the kid,
but he's got a point.
736
00:41:33,824 --> 00:41:37,077
See, even shit-brick
knows you should do it.
737
00:41:37,160 --> 00:41:40,872
All you gotta do is set up some sort
of private link or whatever on the net
738
00:41:40,956 --> 00:41:42,332
and tell me the address.
739
00:41:42,749 --> 00:41:45,460
You can send me
the address too.
740
00:41:45,544 --> 00:41:47,379
I'll save you a seat.
741
00:41:48,797 --> 00:41:53,297
How sweet
it is to be loved by you, by you
742
00:41:53,969 --> 00:41:57,013
I needed the shelter
of someone's arms
743
00:41:57,097 --> 00:41:58,556
Someone's arms
744
00:41:58,640 --> 00:42:00,433
There you were
745
00:42:00,517 --> 00:42:02,268
You were, oh
746
00:42:02,352 --> 00:42:06,852
I needed someone to
understand my ups and downs
747
00:42:07,149 --> 00:42:09,276
There you were
748
00:42:09,359 --> 00:42:12,820
Okay, that was good, but I
want to thicken up that solo.
749
00:42:12,904 --> 00:42:16,407
Michigan State is this Saturday,
and I want that part to smoke.
750
00:42:16,491 --> 00:42:17,742
Yeah, I know,
my timing's off.
751
00:42:17,826 --> 00:42:21,996
No, it's not that. I think it'll work
better as a duet with a tenor part.
752
00:42:22,080 --> 00:42:23,498
I'll do it.
753
00:42:25,542 --> 00:42:26,668
Dick.
754
00:42:27,335 --> 00:42:30,046
I'll do it.
Great. See you tomorrow.
755
00:42:37,137 --> 00:42:38,888
Why are you doing this?
756
00:42:38,972 --> 00:42:40,056
'Cause I want to.
757
00:42:40,140 --> 00:42:44,477
Yeah? Well, you can't
fake this. You better practice.
758
00:42:58,450 --> 00:42:59,742
Come in.
759
00:43:00,952 --> 00:43:05,452
Jim? There's a, a young
lady here to see you.
760
00:43:05,832 --> 00:43:07,834
Hey, Nadia.
Hi, James. Ready to study?
761
00:43:07,918 --> 00:43:10,670
Oh, he's always ready to study.
He's a real bookworm, this kid.
762
00:43:10,754 --> 00:43:12,005
Dad.
I mean,
763
00:43:12,089 --> 00:43:14,132
he's not, not one of those
nerdy guys but...
764
00:43:14,216 --> 00:43:15,508
Dad!
765
00:43:15,592 --> 00:43:18,928
Well, I'll, I'll let you two
hit the books.
766
00:43:23,350 --> 00:43:24,976
You want a beer?
767
00:43:26,394 --> 00:43:27,520
Oh, there we go.
768
00:43:28,063 --> 00:43:29,564
Come on, move!
769
00:43:30,524 --> 00:43:34,819
Steve! It's my computer!
And I wanna use it!
770
00:43:34,903 --> 00:43:36,154
Shut up!
771
00:43:36,613 --> 00:43:39,824
Oh, you need
to... You need to change, right?
772
00:43:39,908 --> 00:43:42,118
Do you mind?
No. No, not at all.
773
00:43:42,202 --> 00:43:46,039
Please, you know. Just go
ahead and get un... Get changed.
774
00:43:46,123 --> 00:43:49,209
I'll, I'll go downstairs
and start studying up.
775
00:43:49,292 --> 00:43:50,793
Yeah.
Okay.
776
00:43:51,628 --> 00:43:54,047
All right, there he goes.
Oh.
777
00:43:54,131 --> 00:43:56,049
Now we're in business.
778
00:43:58,593 --> 00:44:00,636
Back in a sec.
Jimmy, honey...
779
00:44:12,774 --> 00:44:17,069
He pauses shaving and he
tells himself that he is the bomb
780
00:44:17,154 --> 00:44:21,654
She has her curlers set Her
credit cards are paying the funds
781
00:44:21,741 --> 00:44:24,034
He's not that old
I've been told
782
00:44:24,119 --> 00:44:25,537
Here she is.
783
00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:28,581
Did I miss anything?
784
00:44:28,665 --> 00:44:30,750
No. You are just in time.
785
00:44:30,834 --> 00:44:33,294
Oh. Oh!
This is incredible.
786
00:44:34,671 --> 00:44:36,923
Oh, my God!
This is too much.
787
00:44:37,007 --> 00:44:40,760
Oh, did you see?
Oh, there that goes. Oh, geez.
788
00:44:40,844 --> 00:44:42,929
God bless the Internet.
789
00:44:44,806 --> 00:44:46,933
Do it. Take it off.
Oh, my God.
790
00:44:47,017 --> 00:44:48,018
Oh!
791
00:44:48,101 --> 00:44:51,062
Oh, thank you, God, for
this wonderful, wonderful day.
792
00:44:51,146 --> 00:44:53,106
Man, she takes
her vitamins.
793
00:44:53,190 --> 00:44:55,901
And it is way
too unhealthy
794
00:44:55,984 --> 00:44:57,986
Often they've typically
795
00:44:58,069 --> 00:44:59,987
Stop hyperventilating.
796
00:45:04,868 --> 00:45:09,289
This is, like, the coolest
thing I've ever seen.
797
00:45:09,372 --> 00:45:10,664
I know.
798
00:45:12,542 --> 00:45:17,042
Can you believe... This is definitely
one of Stifler's best ideas ever.
799
00:45:17,380 --> 00:45:18,881
What is she...
She's touching my stuff.
800
00:45:19,007 --> 00:45:21,342
Why is she touching my stuff?
Man, let her touch.
801
00:45:21,468 --> 00:45:24,721
She's going through my stuff!
Nadia can touch anything she wants.
802
00:45:32,145 --> 00:45:34,355
Oh.
Oh, no. Oh, no.
803
00:45:34,481 --> 00:45:36,941
No, no. Oh, nice
collection there, Jim.
804
00:45:37,025 --> 00:45:39,902
She's gonna leave.
She's definitely gonna...
805
00:45:39,986 --> 00:45:42,613
She's getting comfortable.
She's not gonna leave.
806
00:45:42,697 --> 00:45:44,615
She reads the articles.
807
00:45:58,046 --> 00:45:59,255
Is she?
808
00:46:00,674 --> 00:46:02,592
She's going downstairs.
809
00:46:13,478 --> 00:46:16,063
Oh, my God!
810
00:46:16,147 --> 00:46:17,523
Jackpot, baby!
811
00:46:17,607 --> 00:46:18,774
Can you believe this?
812
00:46:18,858 --> 00:46:20,734
Nadia,
I would have never known.
813
00:46:20,819 --> 00:46:22,445
I have an announcement
that I would like to make.
814
00:46:22,529 --> 00:46:27,029
There is a gorgeous woman
masturbating on my bed!
815
00:46:27,867 --> 00:46:29,368
Thank you, Nadia!
816
00:46:29,452 --> 00:46:33,205
If you ever had a chance
with Nadia, this is it.
817
00:46:34,499 --> 00:46:35,833
What am I supposed
to do, Kev?
818
00:46:36,334 --> 00:46:37,460
Seduce her.
819
00:46:39,796 --> 00:46:41,464
What the hell
would I say?
820
00:46:41,548 --> 00:46:44,759
Go over there and ask her
if she needs an extra hand.
821
00:46:44,843 --> 00:46:45,844
That's stupid, Kev.
I can't...
822
00:46:45,927 --> 00:46:48,554
That's not stupid! You're
stupid if you don't go!
823
00:46:48,638 --> 00:46:50,556
Come on!
Get over there!
824
00:46:50,640 --> 00:46:51,974
Get going, man.
She's prime.
825
00:46:52,058 --> 00:46:53,142
Get out of here!
826
00:46:53,226 --> 00:46:56,604
She's waiting for you.
Okay, all right. I'm going.
827
00:46:56,688 --> 00:46:57,897
Go! Go!
I'm going!
828
00:46:57,981 --> 00:46:59,983
Go!Go!Go!Go!
Oh, shit.
829
00:47:09,242 --> 00:47:12,912
She's open
waiting for more
830
00:47:12,996 --> 00:47:17,496
And I know he's only
looking to score
831
00:47:17,625 --> 00:47:20,794
And it's way too unhealthy
Often they've typically
832
00:47:20,879 --> 00:47:22,171
Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad.
833
00:47:22,255 --> 00:47:25,591
Been starved
for attention before
834
00:47:28,678 --> 00:47:31,138
Oh, boy. Oh, God.
Oh, crap. Oh, no.
835
00:47:33,933 --> 00:47:35,017
Hello?
836
00:47:35,101 --> 00:47:37,770
Looks like Jim addressed
the e-mail wrong.
837
00:47:37,854 --> 00:47:38,938
What?
838
00:47:39,022 --> 00:47:42,358
It went out to every mailbox
in the East High directory.
839
00:47:42,442 --> 00:47:43,943
God, how juvenile.
840
00:47:44,652 --> 00:47:46,153
Hey, hey, hey, guys!
841
00:47:46,237 --> 00:47:47,279
Baby!
842
00:47:47,364 --> 00:47:50,700
Check this out!
Oh, my God! Wow!
843
00:47:53,495 --> 00:47:54,537
Oh.
844
00:47:56,206 --> 00:48:00,293
Please, God,
let this be it.
845
00:48:00,377 --> 00:48:01,586
Please?
846
00:48:06,132 --> 00:48:07,466
Somebody's going in there.
847
00:48:12,555 --> 00:48:14,848
Here you go.
That's what you need to do.
848
00:48:14,933 --> 00:48:16,726
That guy's in my trig class.
Oh, no.
849
00:48:19,562 --> 00:48:21,564
Looks like you could
use an extra hand.
850
00:48:21,648 --> 00:48:22,815
Jim!
851
00:48:22,899 --> 00:48:25,443
Well... Oh, God.
Shame on you.
852
00:48:25,527 --> 00:48:28,154
Yeah, shame on me.
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
853
00:48:28,238 --> 00:48:30,865
You know, I'm just gonna go.
Well,
854
00:48:32,325 --> 00:48:33,993
you have seen me.
855
00:48:35,078 --> 00:48:37,288
Now, it's my turn to see you.
856
00:48:39,207 --> 00:48:40,416
Strip!
857
00:48:42,252 --> 00:48:43,836
Strip?
Slowly.
858
00:48:46,423 --> 00:48:49,008
You mean, like,
strip, strip?
859
00:48:49,092 --> 00:48:50,301
For me.
860
00:48:52,512 --> 00:48:54,347
What is he talking
to her about?
861
00:48:54,431 --> 00:48:56,182
No idea.
862
00:48:56,266 --> 00:48:58,851
Come on, Jim. People
are viewing. Get to business.
863
00:49:02,439 --> 00:49:03,690
Perfect!
864
00:49:05,525 --> 00:49:08,152
Move, James! Move!
Yeah, yeah. Move.
865
00:49:16,536 --> 00:49:18,955
Go, trig boy!
It's your birthday!
866
00:49:30,008 --> 00:49:31,634
No! No. No.
Please, God.
867
00:49:33,136 --> 00:49:34,137
What's going on?
868
00:49:39,809 --> 00:49:42,102
Yes!
All right. Get in the mix!
869
00:49:42,187 --> 00:49:43,396
See there.
Oh, okay.
870
00:49:46,316 --> 00:49:47,692
This is disgusting.
871
00:49:48,651 --> 00:49:50,569
What the fuck is this?
872
00:49:53,114 --> 00:49:54,740
Cut it out, man!
873
00:50:00,246 --> 00:50:01,372
Yeah.
874
00:50:14,511 --> 00:50:15,678
Freak.
875
00:50:20,767 --> 00:50:22,685
He did not just
take out that chair.
876
00:50:22,769 --> 00:50:24,145
Yup, he took out the chair.
877
00:50:24,229 --> 00:50:26,439
More, more, you bad boy!
878
00:50:26,523 --> 00:50:30,318
Oh, yeah, I'm bad.
I'm naughty, baby. Yeah!
879
00:50:31,194 --> 00:50:33,070
Oh, God!
880
00:50:34,822 --> 00:50:37,407
Calling your name
881
00:50:37,492 --> 00:50:39,911
Calling your name
882
00:50:39,994 --> 00:50:42,496
Now, come to me.
883
00:50:42,580 --> 00:50:44,123
Oh, yeah.
884
00:50:53,049 --> 00:50:54,633
Here we go.
He's in, man.
885
00:50:55,051 --> 00:50:56,052
Calling
886
00:50:56,135 --> 00:50:57,344
This just got
a hell of a lot better.
887
00:50:57,428 --> 00:50:58,971
Be gentle.
888
00:50:59,055 --> 00:51:00,431
Okay.
889
00:51:02,392 --> 00:51:05,478
Calling your name
890
00:51:05,562 --> 00:51:08,231
Calling your name
891
00:51:11,109 --> 00:51:14,570
Oh!
Jim?
892
00:51:14,946 --> 00:51:16,447
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
893
00:51:16,531 --> 00:51:19,825
Oh. Oh!
You've done that before, dude.
894
00:51:19,909 --> 00:51:21,035
Houston,
we have a problem.
895
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:26,373
What happened?
What did he do?
896
00:51:27,083 --> 00:51:28,209
He blew it.
897
00:51:29,168 --> 00:51:30,586
I guess I'll be going now.
898
00:51:30,670 --> 00:51:35,170
No,no,no, I'm not done,
Nadia. I've got reserves.
899
00:51:36,426 --> 00:51:39,137
Nadia, please, please.
I'm begging you.
900
00:51:39,220 --> 00:51:42,181
Well, I do like
your dirty magazines.
901
00:51:42,265 --> 00:51:46,765
You do? Okay.
Well. Did, did you see this one?
902
00:51:47,645 --> 00:51:52,145
This here is your, is your
more exotic, risque magazine.
903
00:51:52,650 --> 00:51:54,818
He's pulling out the porn.
He's desperate.
904
00:51:54,902 --> 00:51:56,320
Jim, just wait
till she leaves.
905
00:51:56,613 --> 00:51:59,198
Very arousing women.
They arouse me...
906
00:51:59,282 --> 00:52:01,325
They arouse me
very, very much.
907
00:52:01,409 --> 00:52:05,746
But... But not as
arousing as you.
908
00:52:05,830 --> 00:52:09,208
Oh, Jim!
Oh, God!
909
00:52:13,796 --> 00:52:15,130
Yes!
Yes!
910
00:52:17,425 --> 00:52:19,176
He's ruining daisy!
911
00:52:22,597 --> 00:52:25,975
So, "shaved"
is the expression?
912
00:52:30,188 --> 00:52:31,480
Holy shit.
913
00:52:31,564 --> 00:52:32,982
Holy shit!
914
00:52:33,191 --> 00:52:34,609
Holy shit!
915
00:52:35,068 --> 00:52:36,194
Holy shit!
916
00:52:36,277 --> 00:52:37,861
Touch me, Jim.
917
00:52:40,531 --> 00:52:41,657
Here.
918
00:52:42,241 --> 00:52:44,201
Oh. Oh.
919
00:52:45,578 --> 00:52:46,579
Again?
920
00:52:46,663 --> 00:52:48,039
Not again.
921
00:52:48,164 --> 00:52:49,665
Not again, man!
922
00:52:50,124 --> 00:52:51,208
Is that possible?
923
00:52:51,834 --> 00:52:53,335
What a loser.
924
00:52:57,423 --> 00:52:58,507
Hey!
925
00:53:21,072 --> 00:53:25,534
I needed someone
to understand my ups and downs
926
00:53:25,618 --> 00:53:28,370
There you were
927
00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:32,875
With sweet love
and devotion
928
00:53:32,959 --> 00:53:35,628
Deeply touching my emotion
929
00:53:35,712 --> 00:53:40,212
I just wanna stop
and thank you, baby
930
00:53:42,719 --> 00:53:44,971
Hey, minute man!
Shut up.
931
00:53:45,054 --> 00:53:47,306
You know... You know you're
supposed to be supportive.
932
00:53:47,390 --> 00:53:50,559
Hey, you think you still
got a chance with Nadia?
933
00:53:51,894 --> 00:53:54,521
No. Her sponsors here
saw the thing on the net.
934
00:53:54,605 --> 00:53:56,940
I really don't think
they liked it.
935
00:53:57,024 --> 00:53:58,900
How do you know that?
936
00:53:59,026 --> 00:54:01,153
She's already on a plane
back home.
937
00:54:01,237 --> 00:54:02,404
Yeah.
938
00:54:03,197 --> 00:54:07,159
You know, guys? Maybe I'm
just not good with girls, period.
939
00:54:07,243 --> 00:54:10,579
No, no, no, really, really. Like, like I
was born without that part of the brain.
940
00:54:10,663 --> 00:54:12,665
I mean,
I can't talk to girls.
941
00:54:12,749 --> 00:54:14,542
And when I do talk to them,
I screw it up.
942
00:54:14,625 --> 00:54:18,253
Yeah, well, come prom, those
excuses aren't going to do you any good.
943
00:54:21,674 --> 00:54:25,594
And one time at band camp,
we weren't supposed to have pillow fights
944
00:54:25,678 --> 00:54:28,931
but we had a pillow fight,
and it was so much fun.
945
00:54:29,015 --> 00:54:33,515
And this one time, we all lost our music
and we were supposed to play this song,
946
00:54:34,061 --> 00:54:38,561
but we didn't know it, so we just made
it up and we kept playing and playing
947
00:54:39,484 --> 00:54:43,696
and the conductor didn't know what
we were doing, and it was so funny.
948
00:54:43,780 --> 00:54:46,157
So, you're pissed
about something, huh.
949
00:54:46,240 --> 00:54:47,741
You know what I do
when I'm angry?
950
00:54:47,825 --> 00:54:51,203
I just play some Bach on
my flute. It's so relaxing.
951
00:54:51,287 --> 00:54:52,705
I learned to do that
at band camp.
952
00:54:52,789 --> 00:54:54,791
Hold on.
953
00:54:54,874 --> 00:54:57,877
You have no idea
why I'm angry?
954
00:54:57,960 --> 00:54:59,795
Is it because we have
a test tomorrow?
955
00:54:59,879 --> 00:55:04,379
Sometimes I get cranky when I
know I have a big test to study for.
956
00:55:04,884 --> 00:55:07,553
Yeah.
Yeah, that's pretty much it.
957
00:55:07,637 --> 00:55:10,389
I thought so because this
one time at band camp...
958
00:55:10,473 --> 00:55:11,974
What's your name?
959
00:55:12,058 --> 00:55:14,060
Michelle.
Okay. Michelle.
960
00:55:16,813 --> 00:55:19,106
Do you want to be
my date for the prom?
961
00:55:19,190 --> 00:55:22,026
Really? You seriously
want to go with me?
962
00:55:26,280 --> 00:55:28,240
Yes. Seriously.
963
00:55:28,324 --> 00:55:30,284
Are we going to Steve
Stifler's party afterwards?
964
00:55:30,368 --> 00:55:32,703
Because that
would be so cool.
965
00:55:32,787 --> 00:55:34,997
Sure, whatever you want.
966
00:55:35,081 --> 00:55:37,583
Cool! We're gonna have
such a good time.
967
00:55:37,667 --> 00:55:41,962
It'll be like this one time at band
camp when we all had a campfire...
968
00:55:57,436 --> 00:55:58,520
Hi.
969
00:56:00,398 --> 00:56:01,941
How'd you know I was here?
970
00:56:02,024 --> 00:56:03,358
Stifler told me.
971
00:56:04,527 --> 00:56:05,903
Talked to Stifler?
972
00:56:05,987 --> 00:56:08,114
Well, I needed to find you.
973
00:56:08,197 --> 00:56:11,283
We're gonna have to
work on that song.
974
00:56:11,367 --> 00:56:14,661
Okay. I'm glad you came by.
975
00:56:14,745 --> 00:56:16,496
So you work nights?
976
00:56:18,791 --> 00:56:20,000
My dad's the manager.
977
00:56:20,084 --> 00:56:21,710
Really?
978
00:56:21,794 --> 00:56:24,671
Cool. Tell him
the subs are great.
979
00:56:27,300 --> 00:56:28,801
So you're going
to Michigan next year?
980
00:56:28,885 --> 00:56:29,886
Yeah.
981
00:56:29,969 --> 00:56:32,721
My parents want me to go
to Northwestern, but...
982
00:56:32,805 --> 00:56:36,058
I don't wanna write all those
extra essays they make you do.
983
00:56:36,142 --> 00:56:37,309
I mean, how am I
supposed to know
984
00:56:37,393 --> 00:56:41,021
what my "most emotionally
significant moment" was?
985
00:56:41,105 --> 00:56:45,605
So when my U of M acceptance came
in December, I just said the hell with it.
986
00:56:46,277 --> 00:56:47,903
Onions?
What?
987
00:56:48,905 --> 00:56:50,865
You want onions?
988
00:56:50,948 --> 00:56:52,574
Oh, no, thank you.
989
00:56:55,328 --> 00:56:57,663
So what are you
gonna major in?
990
00:56:57,747 --> 00:56:59,999
State's got a good
business school,
991
00:57:00,082 --> 00:57:02,751
and I could probably walk
onto the lacrosse team.
992
00:57:02,835 --> 00:57:05,587
Well, you've probably got it
pretty figured out, then, huh?
993
00:57:05,671 --> 00:57:09,883
I mean, business is okay,
and lacrosse is awesome, but,
994
00:57:09,967 --> 00:57:13,011
what am I gonna be, a
professional lacrosse player?
995
00:57:13,095 --> 00:57:14,971
I really have no idea.
996
00:57:15,056 --> 00:57:17,933
Thank God. I thought
I was the only one.
997
00:57:18,935 --> 00:57:20,269
Well, you're not.
998
00:57:21,938 --> 00:57:23,773
So we're gonna be
close next year.
999
00:57:32,198 --> 00:57:34,074
You mean East Lansing
and Ann Arbor?
1000
00:57:34,158 --> 00:57:35,409
Yeah.
1001
00:57:37,453 --> 00:57:38,579
What are you
talking about?
1002
00:57:38,663 --> 00:57:41,207
I'm sorry, but I can't
go to the prom with you.
1003
00:57:41,290 --> 00:57:43,125
I'm holding out
for someone else.
1004
00:57:44,085 --> 00:57:46,295
You gotta be fucking
kidding me.
1005
00:57:46,379 --> 00:57:49,924
I know it's a long shot, but I
figure Paul Finch might ask me.
1006
00:57:50,675 --> 00:57:53,427
Finch. Shit-brick.
1007
00:57:54,470 --> 00:57:57,097
Oh, gosh. I forgot.
1008
00:57:57,181 --> 00:57:59,433
You look okay.
1009
00:57:59,517 --> 00:58:02,186
I mean, the scars
healed really well.
1010
00:58:03,104 --> 00:58:05,106
Hey, Stifler.
Eat shit.
1011
00:58:07,858 --> 00:58:09,693
What was that all about?
1012
00:58:09,777 --> 00:58:12,362
He's still embarrassed
because Finch kicked his ass.
1013
00:58:12,989 --> 00:58:14,115
Who told you that?
1014
00:58:14,824 --> 00:58:16,534
What do you mean,
"no comment"?
1015
00:58:16,617 --> 00:58:17,909
Did you two hook up
or something?
1016
00:58:17,994 --> 00:58:19,787
What, are you kidding? No.
1017
00:58:19,870 --> 00:58:23,164
Then how did all this
get started?
1018
00:58:23,249 --> 00:58:26,585
Well, I guess it's all right
for me to tell you now.
1019
00:58:26,669 --> 00:58:30,756
That reputation of his isn't
going anywhere. Cheese, please.
1020
00:58:30,840 --> 00:58:32,842
Finch comes up to me
and says, "Jessica,
1021
00:58:32,925 --> 00:58:35,510
"I need your help with this,
blah, blah, etcetera."
1022
00:58:35,594 --> 00:58:38,221
So I said, "All right.
Pay me 200 bucks,
1023
00:58:38,305 --> 00:58:41,099
"and I'll tell a couple of girls
that you're dynamite in bed."
1024
00:58:41,183 --> 00:58:43,310
So he did, and I did.
1025
00:58:43,394 --> 00:58:44,603
That actually works?
1026
00:58:44,687 --> 00:58:45,938
Well, duh! Of course.
1027
00:58:46,022 --> 00:58:48,607
Naturally, I embellished
a little bit.
1028
00:58:48,691 --> 00:58:50,984
Did you hear that Finch had
an affair with an older woman?
1029
00:58:51,068 --> 00:58:53,195
No, I didn't hear that one.
1030
00:58:53,279 --> 00:58:55,364
That one was my favorite.
1031
00:58:56,949 --> 00:58:58,116
Dude, that cheerleader.
1032
00:58:58,200 --> 00:58:59,367
Thank you, baby
1033
00:58:59,452 --> 00:59:01,287
She wants me.
She calls me up...
1034
00:59:01,370 --> 00:59:05,870
How sweet it is
to be loved by you
1035
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:08,961
Oh, my God, you're gay!
1036
00:59:09,045 --> 00:59:11,297
Sing it with me.
You know the words.
1037
00:59:11,380 --> 00:59:14,466
No thanks, man. You've
been singing that shit all week.
1038
00:59:14,550 --> 00:59:18,303
If you try that at MSU this
Saturday, I'll kick your ass.
1039
00:59:18,387 --> 00:59:20,180
Our last game
is this Saturday.
1040
00:59:21,307 --> 00:59:22,391
Yeah, well, shit.
1041
00:59:25,978 --> 00:59:29,606
I've got this lacrosse game. It's
really important. It's our last game.
1042
00:59:29,690 --> 00:59:33,235
Central almost beat us last time, so
this time I really wanna kick their ass.
1043
00:59:33,319 --> 00:59:36,113
But it's gonna be cool,
because the game's at State
1044
00:59:36,197 --> 00:59:38,490
which means afterwards
I'll be able to stop by.
1045
00:59:38,574 --> 00:59:40,659
So you can't sing
at the competition.
1046
00:59:41,911 --> 00:59:43,704
Heather, I'm sorry.
I totally blew it.
1047
00:59:43,788 --> 00:59:45,080
It's okay.
1048
00:59:45,164 --> 00:59:47,708
You should do
what makes you happy.
1049
00:59:50,044 --> 00:59:53,672
All right. Listen, thanks
for understanding.
1050
00:59:53,756 --> 00:59:54,882
Yeah.
1051
00:59:57,093 --> 00:59:59,428
So,I guess
I'll see you later?
1052
01:00:15,653 --> 01:00:17,446
Hey, Kevin.
1053
01:00:17,530 --> 01:00:19,031
You seen shit-brick lately?
1054
01:00:19,615 --> 01:00:22,534
Why? What did you do to him?
1055
01:00:22,618 --> 01:00:24,286
Me? Nothing.
1056
01:00:25,538 --> 01:00:27,706
See, I'm the one
whose ass he kicked.
1057
01:00:27,790 --> 01:00:30,542
But, I'll tell you
one thing, though.
1058
01:00:31,127 --> 01:00:33,921
I don't think he's gonna have a
problem shitting in school anymore.
1059
01:00:34,004 --> 01:00:37,132
Slipped a little something
into his mochaccino.
1060
01:00:39,552 --> 01:00:40,803
Oh, God!
1061
01:00:41,971 --> 01:00:44,139
Oh! Oh!
1062
01:00:50,187 --> 01:00:51,396
Jesus.
1063
01:00:52,898 --> 01:00:54,691
Right this way, sir.
1064
01:01:01,323 --> 01:01:02,574
Oh, God.
1065
01:01:33,355 --> 01:01:34,564
Oh, no.
1066
01:01:36,025 --> 01:01:37,359
It's gonna be fun.
1067
01:01:37,443 --> 01:01:40,737
You know it's just gonna be some
crappy band and stupid decorations.
1068
01:01:40,821 --> 01:01:41,988
You're just
saying that
1069
01:01:42,072 --> 01:01:44,491
because prom's a week away
and you don't have a date.
1070
01:01:44,575 --> 01:01:46,910
No, no, no.
I don't want a date.
1071
01:01:47,870 --> 01:01:51,790
Finch is going stag
and so am I.
1072
01:01:51,874 --> 01:01:54,793
God, he's like so refined.
1073
01:01:56,045 --> 01:01:58,130
You think that older woman
thing is true?
1074
01:01:58,214 --> 01:02:01,592
Yeah, it's true.
It was Stifler's mom.
1075
01:02:04,762 --> 01:02:06,930
Joanie, was that you?
1076
01:02:07,014 --> 01:02:09,224
Oh!
Can't hold it.
1077
01:02:09,308 --> 01:02:10,350
Oh!
1078
01:02:17,274 --> 01:02:18,525
Ew!
1079
01:02:41,173 --> 01:02:42,299
Yeah!
1080
01:02:45,594 --> 01:02:48,346
Kev?
I think we've come
1081
01:02:48,430 --> 01:02:50,515
a really long way
since homecoming.
1082
01:02:50,599 --> 01:02:52,058
Yeah, we have.
1083
01:02:52,142 --> 01:02:56,642
Maybe it's time we start to
express ourselves in new ways.
1084
01:02:58,315 --> 01:03:00,358
Yeah.
You wanna do it?
1085
01:03:00,442 --> 01:03:03,319
Yeah.
I love you.
1086
01:03:05,072 --> 01:03:06,615
It's your turn.
1087
01:03:08,659 --> 01:03:10,952
That's not what
I was thinking.
1088
01:03:11,662 --> 01:03:15,207
Sex. It's always about sex.
1089
01:03:15,291 --> 01:03:17,459
It's not always about sex.
1090
01:03:18,460 --> 01:03:21,337
I just thought it was
about sex this time.
1091
01:03:24,925 --> 01:03:29,304
Look, Vicky, love is a term
that gets thrown around
1092
01:03:29,388 --> 01:03:31,556
and, and people
don't mean it.
1093
01:03:31,640 --> 01:03:34,768
When I say it, I want it
to be more than words.
1094
01:03:34,852 --> 01:03:37,521
You know? I want
it to be... Perfect.
1095
01:03:39,815 --> 01:03:41,316
Exactly.
1096
01:03:41,817 --> 01:03:44,361
Okay, Albert. You ready?
No problemo.
1097
01:03:45,654 --> 01:03:49,532
I close my eyes at night
1098
01:03:49,616 --> 01:03:51,326
Come on, Heather.
Work with me here.
1099
01:03:57,499 --> 01:04:00,293
Goal, Ostreicher!
1100
01:04:00,794 --> 01:04:04,214
All right, Oz!
Atta boy, Ozzie!
1101
01:04:04,298 --> 01:04:05,465
Yeah, baby!
1102
01:04:05,549 --> 01:04:08,134
We're crushing you losers!
Let's go, fellas!
1103
01:04:08,218 --> 01:04:09,427
Come on!
1104
01:04:12,514 --> 01:04:16,893
Bumblebee, bumblebee,
bumblebee, bumblebee, bumblebee
1105
01:04:16,977 --> 01:04:19,312
Focus on the music.
Think melody.
1106
01:04:19,396 --> 01:04:20,772
Let the music be my guide.
1107
01:04:20,856 --> 01:04:22,232
That would be a start.
1108
01:04:33,118 --> 01:04:35,370
Who's the man? Stifler!
1109
01:04:37,873 --> 01:04:39,958
Huddle up, guys! Huddle up!
1110
01:04:47,716 --> 01:04:51,970
Huddle up! Come on! Okay.
1111
01:04:52,054 --> 01:04:54,139
All right, all right!
1112
01:04:54,223 --> 01:04:56,225
Good hustle, guys.
Good hustle.
1113
01:04:56,308 --> 01:05:00,808
But you can still lose. You all
saw what happened to Oz out there.
1114
01:05:01,563 --> 01:05:06,063
I don't want to ever see any of
you thinking you're gonna score.
1115
01:05:06,902 --> 01:05:09,905
You don't score
until you score.
1116
01:05:09,988 --> 01:05:12,615
Until you score.
That's right, baby!
1117
01:05:12,699 --> 01:05:15,243
It all boils down to today.
1118
01:05:15,327 --> 01:05:18,705
For you seniors,
this marks the culmination
1119
01:05:18,789 --> 01:05:21,750
of the past four years.
Culmination.
1120
01:05:22,751 --> 01:05:26,504
I want you to think
about what this means to you.
1121
01:05:26,588 --> 01:05:30,049
Do you guys wanna look back
on your days at East
1122
01:05:30,134 --> 01:05:32,845
and know that you used
the time you had?
1123
01:05:32,928 --> 01:05:36,097
Hell, yeah!
You do!
1124
01:05:38,350 --> 01:05:40,268
Good attitude, Ostreicher.
1125
01:05:40,352 --> 01:05:41,728
Good luck, fellas.
1126
01:05:42,646 --> 01:05:45,899
Christ, I didn't tell you
to leave the game.
1127
01:05:45,983 --> 01:05:47,192
I'm sorry, Coach.
1128
01:05:47,276 --> 01:05:50,112
You got someplace more
important to be, Ostreicher?
1129
01:05:50,195 --> 01:05:51,321
Yeah.
1130
01:05:53,157 --> 01:05:54,575
Ostreicher!
1131
01:05:55,617 --> 01:05:59,454
Oz? Fuckface?
1132
01:05:59,538 --> 01:06:00,956
Ostreicher!
1133
01:06:27,191 --> 01:06:29,484
Hey, Oz!
Ozmeister!
1134
01:06:30,444 --> 01:06:31,987
Oh, great.
What about the game?
1135
01:06:32,070 --> 01:06:33,279
I'm not playing.
1136
01:06:33,363 --> 01:06:35,365
You're missing
the game for us?
1137
01:06:35,449 --> 01:06:38,118
No, I'm missing
the game for you.
1138
01:06:41,205 --> 01:06:43,874
Does this mean I'm not
gonna get to do the duet?
1139
01:06:43,957 --> 01:06:45,291
Albert, you suck.
1140
01:06:50,589 --> 01:06:52,465
I don't think
he's coming back.
1141
01:06:52,549 --> 01:06:54,968
Close my eyes at night
1142
01:06:55,052 --> 01:06:56,261
Close my eyes
1143
01:06:56,345 --> 01:06:59,723
Wondering where would I be
without you in my life
1144
01:06:59,806 --> 01:07:01,098
Oh
1145
01:07:01,183 --> 01:07:03,435
Everything I did
was just a bore
1146
01:07:03,519 --> 01:07:04,770
Just a bore
1147
01:07:04,853 --> 01:07:08,565
Everywhere I went
seems I been there before
1148
01:07:08,649 --> 01:07:10,901
But you brighten up for me
But you brighten up for me
1149
01:07:11,026 --> 01:07:12,944
All of my days
All of my days
1150
01:07:13,028 --> 01:07:14,821
With a love so sweet
1151
01:07:14,905 --> 01:07:16,281
In so many ways
1152
01:07:16,365 --> 01:07:18,784
I just wanna stop
1153
01:07:18,867 --> 01:07:20,618
And thank you, baby
And thank you, baby
1154
01:07:20,702 --> 01:07:23,287
I just wanna stop
1155
01:07:23,372 --> 01:07:24,956
And thank you, baby
And thank you, baby
1156
01:07:25,040 --> 01:07:26,499
Thank you, baby
1157
01:07:26,583 --> 01:07:28,585
How sweet it is
How sweet it is
1158
01:07:28,669 --> 01:07:31,213
To be loved by you
To be loved by you
1159
01:07:34,258 --> 01:07:36,760
Yeah, Oz!
You fucking rule!
1160
01:07:36,843 --> 01:07:39,470
Fucking rule!
Yeah!
1161
01:07:42,224 --> 01:07:44,226
Maybe the words
aren't that important.
1162
01:07:44,309 --> 01:07:46,519
It's like, I know he really
cares about me, you know?
1163
01:07:46,603 --> 01:07:48,813
Even if he can't say it,
he does.
1164
01:07:48,897 --> 01:07:52,692
And yeah, he always talks about sex,
but that's okay, 'cause he's a guy, right?
1165
01:07:52,776 --> 01:07:54,402
He's got a dick.
He's a guy.
1166
01:07:54,486 --> 01:07:55,904
Right.
1167
01:07:55,988 --> 01:07:57,406
Wait. Is this
translation right?
1168
01:07:57,489 --> 01:08:00,408
"Go home, bird teacher.
I've had enough."
1169
01:08:00,492 --> 01:08:02,911
I don't know.
I got it from Kevin.
1170
01:08:04,079 --> 01:08:07,082
So, does it hurt?
What?
1171
01:08:07,165 --> 01:08:10,501
You know, sex.
Does it hurt?
1172
01:08:10,586 --> 01:08:14,464
Yeah. I mean, the first time
you do it, you know, it hurts.
1173
01:08:14,548 --> 01:08:18,843
But then you, you do it
again and again and again...
1174
01:08:18,927 --> 01:08:21,971
It just starts to feel good.
Really good.
1175
01:08:22,055 --> 01:08:24,766
Okay, so say
I don't do it.
1176
01:08:26,268 --> 01:08:27,602
And then
I go off to college.
1177
01:08:27,686 --> 01:08:30,021
I might end up doing it
with some random guy
1178
01:08:30,105 --> 01:08:32,023
who totally turns out
to be a jerk.
1179
01:08:32,107 --> 01:08:33,691
This is true.
1180
01:08:33,775 --> 01:08:36,652
And I'll wish I would've
done it with Kevin.
1181
01:08:36,737 --> 01:08:38,655
So go do it with Kevin.
1182
01:08:39,615 --> 01:08:42,034
You think? Yeah.
You're... You're ready.
1183
01:08:42,117 --> 01:08:45,453
You're woman. Look at you.
You're ready for sex.
1184
01:08:45,537 --> 01:08:46,955
You're right.
I know.
1185
01:08:47,080 --> 01:08:49,290
I'm gonna do it. I'm
gonna have sex. Now.
1186
01:08:49,374 --> 01:08:51,501
And it's gonna be right,
and it's gonna be just perfect.
1187
01:08:51,585 --> 01:08:53,795
Perfect sex.
Thanks, Jessica.
1188
01:08:53,879 --> 01:08:55,130
Please.
1189
01:08:56,923 --> 01:08:58,090
Kevin.
1190
01:08:59,384 --> 01:09:00,593
Kevin.
1191
01:09:02,888 --> 01:09:06,141
I wanna
have sex. Now?
1192
01:09:11,313 --> 01:09:12,480
Prom.
1193
01:09:16,068 --> 01:09:20,568
As you walk up those steps
and garner your award
1194
01:09:21,281 --> 01:09:25,368
Try not to forget about me
1195
01:09:25,452 --> 01:09:28,705
'Cause I was there when
you had no one else to hold
1196
01:09:30,999 --> 01:09:34,252
You used to look
just like a saint
1197
01:09:34,336 --> 01:09:36,129
Stumbling towards
1198
01:09:36,213 --> 01:09:40,342
Yours and God's
very own quarantine
1199
01:09:40,425 --> 01:09:44,846
You used to never think
you'd ever grow old
1200
01:09:55,107 --> 01:09:57,692
You must be excited
about the big night tonight.
1201
01:09:57,776 --> 01:09:59,068
Thrilled.
1202
01:10:00,153 --> 01:10:01,404
Who's the lucky girl?
1203
01:10:03,073 --> 01:10:04,949
Michelle.
1204
01:10:05,033 --> 01:10:07,326
Yeah.
Michelle.
1205
01:10:08,203 --> 01:10:10,205
She must be very special.
1206
01:10:10,288 --> 01:10:12,081
Oh, she's special,
all right.
1207
01:10:12,165 --> 01:10:15,376
I'm sure she is special if you
picked her out of the whole bunch.
1208
01:10:19,423 --> 01:10:22,843
Jim, I'm just gonna say one
thing before you leave tonight.
1209
01:10:24,636 --> 01:10:27,680
I want you to be
very, very careful
1210
01:10:29,474 --> 01:10:31,851
when you're putting on
1211
01:10:31,935 --> 01:10:33,394
the corsage.
1212
01:10:38,233 --> 01:10:39,317
Okay, Dad.
1213
01:10:39,401 --> 01:10:41,361
Promise me.
I promise.
1214
01:11:02,340 --> 01:11:02,381
Midnight at the oasis
1215
01:11:02,382 --> 01:11:06,094
Midnight at the oasis
1216
01:11:07,637 --> 01:11:11,641
Send your camel to bed
1217
01:11:12,934 --> 01:11:16,437
Shadows painting our faces
1218
01:11:16,521 --> 01:11:21,021
Traces of romance
in our heads
1219
01:11:23,111 --> 01:11:26,447
Heaven's holding
a half-moon
1220
01:11:28,283 --> 01:11:32,036
Shining just for us
1221
01:11:33,205 --> 01:11:37,167
Let's slip off
to a sand dune
1222
01:11:37,250 --> 01:11:39,377
Real soon
1223
01:11:39,461 --> 01:11:42,547
And kick up a little dust
1224
01:11:42,631 --> 01:11:47,131
Come on
Cactus is our friend
1225
01:11:47,719 --> 01:11:51,848
He'll point out the way
1226
01:11:51,932 --> 01:11:54,684
You know, at band camp,
we have dances like this,
1227
01:11:54,768 --> 01:11:56,728
only they're way funner.
1228
01:11:57,979 --> 01:12:01,399
Till the evening ends
1229
01:12:01,483 --> 01:12:03,651
Hey, hey, hey
1230
01:12:11,743 --> 01:12:14,829
All right, status check.
Where do you guys stand?
1231
01:12:14,913 --> 01:12:18,708
Finch, we know where you are,
but can't really use that as an excuse.
1232
01:12:18,792 --> 01:12:20,585
Jim?
1233
01:12:20,669 --> 01:12:25,090
My date's a flute-toting band dork.
Does that answer your question?
1234
01:12:25,173 --> 01:12:28,593
Oz, is this vocal-jazz shit
gonna pay off or what?
1235
01:12:28,677 --> 01:12:31,346
Kevin, what's with
the attitude?
1236
01:12:31,429 --> 01:12:34,306
Attitude? Me?
1237
01:12:34,391 --> 01:12:37,018
I think you guys should be
a little more enthusiastic.
1238
01:12:37,811 --> 01:12:39,687
This is the night
we've been waiting for.
1239
01:12:39,771 --> 01:12:41,814
We're in this together.
You guys can't back out.
1240
01:12:41,898 --> 01:12:45,484
Kev, you don't need us to get
laid. Are you afraid or something?
1241
01:12:45,569 --> 01:12:48,863
No. Come on.
We made a pact.
1242
01:12:49,447 --> 01:12:52,241
You can't break that.
You guys are gonna have to...
1243
01:12:52,325 --> 01:12:56,078
Have to what, Kev, huh?
I don't have to do shit.
1244
01:12:56,162 --> 01:13:00,416
Forget it already. I am so sick
and tired of all this bullshit pressure.
1245
01:13:00,500 --> 01:13:04,712
I've never even had sex, and
already, I can't stand it. I hate sex!
1246
01:13:04,796 --> 01:13:07,882
And I'm not gonna stand around here
busting my balls over something that,
1247
01:13:07,966 --> 01:13:10,635
quite frankly,
isn't that damn important.
1248
01:13:10,719 --> 01:13:12,512
I'm gonna go hang out
with that geek over there
1249
01:13:12,596 --> 01:13:16,600
'cause at least she has something
else to talk about besides sex.
1250
01:13:16,683 --> 01:13:17,892
Goddamn.
1251
01:13:19,978 --> 01:13:21,104
Yeah.
1252
01:13:22,439 --> 01:13:25,817
You know, at least I learned
how to shit in school, buddy.
1253
01:13:25,901 --> 01:13:27,777
Hey, Finch.
1254
01:13:27,861 --> 01:13:30,613
Wanna dance?
Yeah.
1255
01:13:31,907 --> 01:13:34,534
Oooh
1256
01:13:35,911 --> 01:13:37,412
How come you have no date?
1257
01:13:37,495 --> 01:13:39,705
I like to keep
my options open.
1258
01:13:39,789 --> 01:13:41,749
I got something for you.
1259
01:13:44,085 --> 01:13:45,753
Consider it
a consolation prize.
1260
01:13:48,924 --> 01:13:51,468
Jessica, this is great! Wow!
1261
01:13:51,551 --> 01:13:54,136
Felt sort of guilty
about taking your money.
1262
01:13:54,220 --> 01:13:55,846
You spent $200 on this?
1263
01:13:55,931 --> 01:14:00,018
No, I spent 50 on the flask,
150 on the earrings.
1264
01:14:01,645 --> 01:14:03,813
These are...
Let me just clarify
1265
01:14:03,897 --> 01:14:06,441
that you have no chance
of scoring with me, Finch.
1266
01:14:06,524 --> 01:14:08,192
Of course not!
1267
01:14:08,276 --> 01:14:10,778
So I take it you and
Sherman are pretty close, huh?
1268
01:14:10,862 --> 01:14:12,905
You met at that party
a while back, right?
1269
01:14:12,989 --> 01:14:14,949
Yeah, we were up
all night together.
1270
01:14:15,033 --> 01:14:18,119
We had one of those
amazingly deep conversations
1271
01:14:18,203 --> 01:14:21,497
where you feel like you
really get to know someone.
1272
01:14:22,457 --> 01:14:24,542
Deep conversation, huh?
1273
01:14:24,626 --> 01:14:26,794
Is that what you call it?
1274
01:14:26,878 --> 01:14:28,796
What else would I call it?
1275
01:14:35,762 --> 01:14:37,472
Thank you, Great Falls.
1276
01:14:37,555 --> 01:14:40,849
We're gonna take a little
break. You are beautiful.
1277
01:14:44,896 --> 01:14:46,188
You suck!
1278
01:14:49,985 --> 01:14:51,820
Excuse me, everyone.
1279
01:14:52,988 --> 01:14:55,198
Sorry to interrupt.
1280
01:14:55,281 --> 01:14:57,825
I just thought
you all should know this.
1281
01:14:57,909 --> 01:15:00,411
Chuck Sherman is a liar.
1282
01:15:00,495 --> 01:15:02,371
I never had sex with him.
1283
01:15:02,455 --> 01:15:04,582
He's never had sex
with anyone.
1284
01:15:04,666 --> 01:15:06,668
I know this because
he told me.
1285
01:15:06,751 --> 01:15:09,879
Once he tried to screw
a grapefruit, but that's all.
1286
01:15:09,963 --> 01:15:12,548
Oh. He also told me
that when he gets nervous,
1287
01:15:12,632 --> 01:15:14,383
he sometimes
wets his pants.
1288
01:15:14,467 --> 01:15:16,427
Thank you for your time.
1289
01:15:30,984 --> 01:15:34,153
Guess what?
Not interested.
1290
01:15:34,237 --> 01:15:38,737
Kevin. Come on, man. The bus
to Stifler's is gonna be here soon.
1291
01:15:38,950 --> 01:15:41,285
I'm not going.
What?
1292
01:15:41,369 --> 01:15:42,620
Why not?
1293
01:15:44,164 --> 01:15:47,750
Look, things didn't really
turn out how I wanted them to.
1294
01:15:49,210 --> 01:15:51,462
I mean, I don't even know
what I'm doing.
1295
01:15:51,546 --> 01:15:55,091
I'm acting like I've got
everything together tonight.
1296
01:15:55,175 --> 01:15:58,970
I know that Vicky's gonna
ask me if I love her, and
1297
01:15:59,054 --> 01:16:01,139
I don't know
what I'm gonna say.
1298
01:16:01,222 --> 01:16:02,806
I mean,
I'm on the brink.
1299
01:16:02,891 --> 01:16:06,561
I'm just about to do it.
I should be psyched.
1300
01:16:06,644 --> 01:16:10,564
I don't know. Maybe you're
right. Maybe I am just scared.
1301
01:16:11,441 --> 01:16:14,652
Come on, Kev.
Tonight is the night.
1302
01:16:14,736 --> 01:16:17,780
We, we are finally going to a
post-prom party on the lake.
1303
01:16:17,864 --> 01:16:20,825
We have been waiting
for this for four years.
1304
01:16:20,909 --> 01:16:24,329
Why else have we been friends
with Stifler all this time, right?
1305
01:16:24,412 --> 01:16:25,955
We were friends
with Stifler?
1306
01:16:27,082 --> 01:16:28,458
Hey, look.
1307
01:16:30,210 --> 01:16:32,921
Sherman didn't
even get laid.
1308
01:16:33,004 --> 01:16:35,423
He didn't?
No, he pissed himself.
1309
01:16:36,883 --> 01:16:38,009
What?
1310
01:16:39,511 --> 01:16:41,513
We'll tell you on the bus.
1311
01:16:41,596 --> 01:16:44,849
I'm gonna go inside
and grab my bag.
1312
01:16:44,933 --> 01:16:46,768
My date, too, perhaps?
1313
01:16:49,145 --> 01:16:51,272
Stifler's mom got it
in the divorce.
1314
01:16:51,356 --> 01:16:53,316
That reminds me
of this one time...
1315
01:16:53,399 --> 01:16:56,193
Hey, can I ask you
a question?
1316
01:16:56,277 --> 01:16:59,029
How come you don't have
any stories? I've got lots of them
1317
01:16:59,114 --> 01:17:01,366
and you don't have any.
1318
01:17:01,449 --> 01:17:04,618
Oh, I've got stories.
Believe me. They're just...
1319
01:17:04,702 --> 01:17:07,454
They're just a little more
risque than tales of band camp.
1320
01:17:07,580 --> 01:17:12,042
Are they gross or something?
Like guy stuff? Tell me!
1321
01:17:12,127 --> 01:17:13,795
Okay. You want a story?
1322
01:17:13,878 --> 01:17:16,589
Here's a story.
Stifler finds this beer...
1323
01:17:20,218 --> 01:17:22,386
This is the nicest room
in the house.
1324
01:17:22,470 --> 01:17:23,929
Kev, it's perfect.
1325
01:17:36,484 --> 01:17:38,861
You guys are gonna
fuck, aren't you?
1326
01:17:38,945 --> 01:17:41,405
Fuckers!
Fuckers, fuckers!
1327
01:17:41,489 --> 01:17:44,200
Fuckers, fuckers, fuckers!
1328
01:17:45,451 --> 01:17:47,744
Out.
Come on!
1329
01:17:47,829 --> 01:17:50,248
Get out.
Man!
1330
01:18:08,141 --> 01:18:10,268
There's something I've been
meaning to tell you, Heather.
1331
01:18:10,351 --> 01:18:12,770
What's that?
1332
01:18:12,854 --> 01:18:16,232
It's gonna sound really
bad, but, I want you to know...
1333
01:18:17,901 --> 01:18:19,277
You see...
1334
01:18:20,653 --> 01:18:23,197
I'm a virgin, and...
1335
01:18:24,991 --> 01:18:27,618
Well, me, Kevin,
Jim and Finch were...
1336
01:18:27,702 --> 01:18:30,204
We all made this pact
1337
01:18:30,288 --> 01:18:33,291
that we would
lose our virginity
1338
01:18:33,374 --> 01:18:35,918
before high school
was over,
1339
01:18:36,002 --> 01:18:39,714
and tonight is supposed to
be the night that we all do it.
1340
01:18:40,632 --> 01:18:42,800
This isn't the best way
to proposition me.
1341
01:18:42,884 --> 01:18:45,469
No, that's...
That's not what I mean.
1342
01:18:45,553 --> 01:18:47,221
What I mean is...
1343
01:18:49,057 --> 01:18:52,143
Look, do you know what
made me leave that game?
1344
01:18:52,227 --> 01:18:55,647
See, Coach, he was
giving us this speech about
1345
01:18:55,730 --> 01:18:58,983
not slacking off when you see
the opportunity to score...
1346
01:18:59,067 --> 01:19:00,526
This isn't
any better, Chris.
1347
01:19:00,610 --> 01:19:03,404
No, see...
You see, Heather,
1348
01:19:03,488 --> 01:19:06,365
what I realized
is that with you,
1349
01:19:06,449 --> 01:19:10,327
it's not like
I'm running towards a goal
1350
01:19:10,411 --> 01:19:12,913
looking for the best way
to score.
1351
01:19:13,957 --> 01:19:16,626
This may sound
a little corny, but,
1352
01:19:17,502 --> 01:19:19,670
I feel like
I've already won.
1353
01:19:22,131 --> 01:19:25,134
And I care about you a lot.
1354
01:19:27,720 --> 01:19:29,096
Oz, I know.
1355
01:19:31,432 --> 01:19:32,516
You called me Oz.
1356
01:19:32,600 --> 01:19:34,935
Well, yeah.
1357
01:19:35,019 --> 01:19:37,021
It's what your friends
call you.
1358
01:19:37,105 --> 01:19:40,233
I mean, I feel like
I'm one of your friends now.
1359
01:19:40,316 --> 01:19:42,943
And your girlfriend?
1360
01:19:45,822 --> 01:19:50,201
I never thought
that I could love like this
1361
01:19:50,285 --> 01:19:53,538
This feeling inside me
is growing
1362
01:19:53,621 --> 01:19:58,121
I never thought
that you would come
1363
01:20:18,104 --> 01:20:19,647
Are you lost?
1364
01:20:23,735 --> 01:20:26,571
You're Stifler's mom.
1365
01:20:26,654 --> 01:20:28,739
No, no, not lost. Just...
1366
01:20:30,074 --> 01:20:32,076
You know, taking the tour.
1367
01:20:34,037 --> 01:20:37,665
Hey, thank you for letting us
have this wonderful party.
1368
01:20:37,749 --> 01:20:40,710
As if there was an
alternative in the matter.
1369
01:20:46,174 --> 01:20:48,176
50, YOU enjoying yourself?
1370
01:20:48,259 --> 01:20:51,387
I'm three sheets
to the wind, ma'am.
1371
01:20:51,971 --> 01:20:54,139
I'm so happy for YOU-
1372
01:20:54,223 --> 01:20:55,933
But it takes the edge off,
doesn't it?
1373
01:20:57,852 --> 01:20:59,436
Where's your
little date tonight?
1374
01:20:59,520 --> 01:21:01,355
No date. It was...
1375
01:21:01,439 --> 01:21:03,566
It was a bathroom incident.
1376
01:21:04,692 --> 01:21:05,984
Pardon me?
1377
01:21:06,069 --> 01:21:07,320
Never mind.
1378
01:21:12,033 --> 01:21:14,744
You have anything to drink?
1379
01:21:14,827 --> 01:21:17,913
I believe the kegs
are upstairs.
1380
01:21:17,997 --> 01:21:20,457
That is what
the cretins drink.
1381
01:21:20,541 --> 01:21:22,543
I'm talking about alcohol,
liquor.
1382
01:21:22,627 --> 01:21:25,588
The good stuff.
All right.
1383
01:21:27,590 --> 01:21:29,383
I got some scotch.
1384
01:21:29,467 --> 01:21:30,634
Single malt?
1385
01:21:30,718 --> 01:21:32,136
Aged 18 years.
1386
01:21:33,971 --> 01:21:35,681
The way I like it.
1387
01:21:39,894 --> 01:21:42,730
Why don't you go grab
a glass from the bar?
1388
01:21:44,357 --> 01:21:46,025
I think I should.
1389
01:21:47,068 --> 01:21:48,402
Allow me.
1390
01:21:50,530 --> 01:21:52,323
You know it's
a bitching party.
1391
01:21:52,407 --> 01:21:55,576
The Stif-man always
comes through in the clutch.
1392
01:21:59,414 --> 01:22:02,083
And then he just
puked his brains out.
1393
01:22:02,166 --> 01:22:05,210
That is a nasty story.
Yep, I told you.
1394
01:22:05,294 --> 01:22:09,256
Do you want to hear a nasty
story of mine? It's sort of sexual.
1395
01:22:11,342 --> 01:22:13,969
Yeah! Yeah, let's hear it.
1396
01:22:14,053 --> 01:22:18,553
Okay, well, this one time at band
camp, we were playing this game.
1397
01:22:19,058 --> 01:22:22,561
I don't know if you know it,
but it's called "Spin the Bottle."
1398
01:22:22,645 --> 01:22:26,732
And I had to kiss this guy
named Mark Wander on the lips.
1399
01:22:26,816 --> 01:22:28,442
And...
And he plays trombone...
1400
01:22:29,110 --> 01:22:31,237
So how do you want to be?
1401
01:22:31,320 --> 01:22:33,989
Like, how do you
want to do it?
1402
01:22:35,324 --> 01:22:38,201
I don't know.
How do you?
1403
01:22:38,286 --> 01:22:42,786
Like normal style.
The missionary position.
1404
01:22:45,668 --> 01:22:46,835
Okay.
1405
01:22:53,009 --> 01:22:54,093
Kev?
1406
01:22:54,969 --> 01:22:58,013
Yeah?
I wanna hear you say it.
1407
01:22:58,097 --> 01:22:59,181
Okay.
1408
01:23:02,643 --> 01:23:03,977
Victoria...
1409
01:23:05,646 --> 01:23:07,022
I love you.
1410
01:23:08,649 --> 01:23:09,983
I love you.
1411
01:23:22,955 --> 01:23:24,748
Don't stray
1412
01:23:24,832 --> 01:23:27,334
Don't ever go away
1413
01:23:27,418 --> 01:23:30,170
I should be much
too smart for this
1414
01:23:30,254 --> 01:23:32,798
You know it gets
the better of me
1415
01:23:32,882 --> 01:23:37,094
Sometimes,
when you and I collide
1416
01:23:37,178 --> 01:23:38,304
Oh. My hair.
1417
01:23:38,387 --> 01:23:40,222
I fall into
an ocean of you
1418
01:23:40,306 --> 01:23:42,349
Pull me out in time
1419
01:23:42,433 --> 01:23:44,268
Don't let me drown
1420
01:23:44,352 --> 01:23:46,645
Let me down
1421
01:23:46,729 --> 01:23:48,021
You Okay?
1422
01:23:49,232 --> 01:23:52,276
Yeah. Go slow.
1423
01:23:53,277 --> 01:23:55,988
Say you'll stay
1424
01:23:56,072 --> 01:23:59,533
Don't come and go
1425
01:23:59,617 --> 01:24:01,660
Like you do
1426
01:24:03,454 --> 01:24:06,123
Sway my Way
1427
01:24:06,207 --> 01:24:09,293
Yeah, I need to know
1428
01:24:09,377 --> 01:24:12,046
All about you
1429
01:24:13,548 --> 01:24:15,883
Say you'll stay
1430
01:24:15,967 --> 01:24:18,469
So the end of
the story is you
1431
01:24:18,553 --> 01:24:21,097
had to kiss the guy
for 20 seconds.
1432
01:24:21,180 --> 01:24:25,267
Yes! And he was such a dork.
Everyone laughed at me
1433
01:24:25,351 --> 01:24:27,770
but I didn't care
because it was so funny.
1434
01:24:27,853 --> 01:24:29,145
I get it.
1435
01:24:29,230 --> 01:24:33,067
And this one time at band
camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy.
1436
01:24:36,904 --> 01:24:38,030
Excuse me?
1437
01:24:38,114 --> 01:24:40,825
What? You don't think
I know how to get myself off?
1438
01:24:40,908 --> 01:24:44,286
Hell, that's what half of
band camp is. Sex Ed.
1439
01:24:44,370 --> 01:24:48,082
So are we gonna screw soon?
'Cause I'm getting kinda antsy.
1440
01:24:56,299 --> 01:24:57,675
This'll do.
1441
01:25:00,428 --> 01:25:01,470
Ow!
1442
01:25:04,432 --> 01:25:08,932
Now, I have two rubbers. Wear
them both. It'll desensitize you.
1443
01:25:09,020 --> 01:25:12,189
I don't want you coming
so damn early this time.
1444
01:25:13,733 --> 01:25:15,860
What makes you think
that I would come early?
1445
01:25:15,943 --> 01:25:18,195
Come on.
I saw you on the net.
1446
01:25:18,279 --> 01:25:20,281
Why do you think
I accepted this date?
1447
01:25:20,364 --> 01:25:22,157
You're a sure thing.
1448
01:25:25,077 --> 01:25:26,453
Yes, I am.
1449
01:25:28,205 --> 01:25:32,250
So I said, "This is very obviously
a Piero della Francesca."
1450
01:25:40,009 --> 01:25:44,509
So, would you object if I said
that you were quite striking?
1451
01:25:46,849 --> 01:25:50,727
Mr. Finch, are you
trying to seduce me?
1452
01:25:50,811 --> 01:25:52,062
Yes, ma'am, I am.
1453
01:25:52,146 --> 01:25:55,274
And here's to you,
Mrs. Robinson
1454
01:25:55,358 --> 01:25:59,779
Jesus loves you
more than you will know
1455
01:25:59,862 --> 01:26:02,406
Whoa, whoa, whoa
1456
01:26:02,490 --> 01:26:05,743
Stand up tall,
Mrs. Robinson
1457
01:26:05,826 --> 01:26:07,702
God in heaven smiles
on those who pray
1458
01:26:07,787 --> 01:26:09,789
You're dead.
1459
01:26:09,872 --> 01:26:12,249
Hey, hey, hey
1460
01:26:12,333 --> 01:26:13,751
Hey, hey, hey
1461
01:26:16,754 --> 01:26:19,339
Sway my Way
1462
01:26:19,423 --> 01:26:22,426
Yeah, I need to know
1463
01:26:22,510 --> 01:26:25,930
All about you
1464
01:26:26,013 --> 01:26:28,557
And there's no cure
1465
01:26:28,641 --> 01:26:31,185
And no way to be sure
1466
01:26:31,268 --> 01:26:33,728
Why everything's
turned inside out
1467
01:26:33,813 --> 01:26:35,731
instilling so much doubt
1468
01:26:35,815 --> 01:26:38,192
It makes me so tired
1469
01:26:38,275 --> 01:26:41,069
I feel so uninspired
1470
01:26:41,153 --> 01:26:43,738
My head is battling
with my heart
1471
01:26:43,823 --> 01:26:47,576
My logic has been torn apart
And now
1472
01:26:47,702 --> 01:26:50,121
I had no idea
Neither did I.
1473
01:26:50,204 --> 01:26:52,080
Oh, Finchy. Finch.
1474
01:26:52,164 --> 01:26:55,083
Oh, Stifler's mom, whoa!
Finchy!
1475
01:27:03,467 --> 01:27:04,593
Okay, let's go.
1476
01:27:04,677 --> 01:27:06,970
What's my name?
Say my name, bitch!
1477
01:27:07,054 --> 01:27:08,930
Michelle, Michelle.
1478
01:27:10,599 --> 01:27:11,891
JIM; Oh, God.
1479
01:27:40,504 --> 01:27:42,255
That was a great night, huh?
1480
01:27:45,843 --> 01:27:47,010
Yeah.
1481
01:27:48,596 --> 01:27:51,849
I mean, I just can't believe
we had our senior prom.
1482
01:27:51,932 --> 01:27:54,017
I know.
1483
01:27:54,101 --> 01:27:56,103
It went by so fast.
1484
01:27:56,187 --> 01:27:57,646
Yeah, it did.
1485
01:27:58,773 --> 01:27:59,940
Kevin?
1486
01:28:05,112 --> 01:28:08,865
Next year with you going to
Ann Arbor and me going to Ithaca,
1487
01:28:10,868 --> 01:28:12,995
it's not gonna work, is it?
1488
01:28:14,079 --> 01:28:16,206
No. Don't say that.
1489
01:28:16,290 --> 01:28:18,875
I mean,
we could make it work.
1490
01:28:20,085 --> 01:28:22,462
It'll be perfect.
No, Kevin.
1491
01:28:24,423 --> 01:28:26,758
But... See, that's
what I've been realizing
1492
01:28:26,842 --> 01:28:29,928
is that nothing's perfect.
1493
01:28:30,012 --> 01:28:32,264
And you can't
plan everything.
1494
01:28:34,308 --> 01:28:37,644
Well, I guess
you will be pretty far away.
1495
01:28:39,355 --> 01:28:42,274
And we'll be on our own,
meeting new people.
1496
01:28:46,779 --> 01:28:48,530
Last night, though.
1497
01:28:52,368 --> 01:28:53,994
I wasn't lying.
1498
01:28:56,580 --> 01:28:57,831
I know.
1499
01:29:14,348 --> 01:29:15,766
She's gone.
1500
01:29:18,018 --> 01:29:19,894
Oh, my God.
She used me.
1501
01:29:19,979 --> 01:29:21,355
I was used.
1502
01:29:24,024 --> 01:29:25,400
I was used.
1503
01:29:26,360 --> 01:29:27,444
Cool!
1504
01:29:29,905 --> 01:29:31,615
What's this door locked...
1505
01:29:31,699 --> 01:29:33,409
Mom, where's...
1506
01:29:35,160 --> 01:29:37,912
Mom? Shit-brick?
1507
01:29:37,997 --> 01:29:39,248
Hey, Stifler.
1508
01:29:41,834 --> 01:29:44,294
Do do do
Do do do do
1509
01:29:44,920 --> 01:29:47,213
I just gotta say
that women,
1510
01:29:48,591 --> 01:29:52,303
like a fine wine,
only get better with age.
1511
01:29:52,386 --> 01:29:56,515
Of course, I have no basis
for comparison, but
1512
01:29:56,599 --> 01:29:57,891
it was good.
1513
01:29:57,975 --> 01:30:00,310
So you almost made it,
huh, Oz?
1514
01:30:00,394 --> 01:30:02,771
I'll just say that we had
a great night together.
1515
01:30:02,855 --> 01:30:04,815
Hang in there, buddy.
1516
01:30:04,899 --> 01:30:06,233
You'll get there.
1517
01:30:06,317 --> 01:30:09,361
You know, guys, I
think we're falling in love.
1518
01:30:11,739 --> 01:30:13,031
Wow.
1519
01:30:13,115 --> 01:30:15,575
That's great, man.
That's awesome.
1520
01:30:16,911 --> 01:30:19,747
You know what
the coolest thing is, guys?
1521
01:30:19,830 --> 01:30:22,374
It's this.
You know, right now.
1522
01:30:22,458 --> 01:30:25,794
It's true. I mean, after this,
everything's gonna be different.
1523
01:30:25,878 --> 01:30:27,629
After getting laid?
1524
01:30:29,089 --> 01:30:30,507
After high school.
1525
01:30:30,591 --> 01:30:32,301
Here's to the next step.
1526
01:30:32,384 --> 01:30:33,385
To the next step.
1527
01:30:33,469 --> 01:30:34,761
To the next step.
1528
01:30:34,845 --> 01:30:36,513
To the next step.
1529
01:30:39,308 --> 01:30:40,600
Do do do
Do do do do
1530
01:30:40,684 --> 01:30:43,103
Do do do
Do do do do
1531
01:30:43,187 --> 01:30:45,522
Do do do
Do do do do
1532
01:30:45,606 --> 01:30:48,025
Do do do
Do do do do
1533
01:30:54,114 --> 01:30:55,949
Chickety China
the Chinese chicken
1534
01:30:56,033 --> 01:30:58,368
You have a drumstick
and your brain stops ticking
1535
01:30:58,452 --> 01:30:59,953
Watching X Files
with no lights on
1536
01:31:00,037 --> 01:31:02,247
We're dans la maison I hope
the Smoking Man's in this one
1537
01:31:02,331 --> 01:31:04,374
Like Harrison Ford
I'm getting frantic
1538
01:31:04,458 --> 01:31:06,793
Like Sting I'm tantric Like
Snickers guaranteed to satisfy
1539
01:31:06,877 --> 01:31:08,712
Like Kurosawa
I make mad films
1540
01:31:08,796 --> 01:31:11,006
Okay, I don't make films but
if I did they'd have a samurai
1541
01:31:11,090 --> 01:31:13,592
Gonna get a set of better clubs
gonna find the kind with tiny nubs
1542
01:31:13,676 --> 01:31:15,386
So my irons aren't always
flying off the backswing
1543
01:31:15,469 --> 01:31:17,304
Gonna get in tune with
Sailor Moon 'cause that cartoon
1544
01:31:17,388 --> 01:31:19,765
Has got the boom anime babes
that make me think the wrong thing
1545
01:31:19,848 --> 01:31:21,808
How can I help it if I think
you're funny when you're mad
1546
01:31:21,892 --> 01:31:24,060
Trying hard not to smile
though I feel bad
1547
01:31:24,144 --> 01:31:25,687
I'm the kind of guy
who laughs at a funeral
1548
01:31:25,771 --> 01:31:26,897
Sweetheart?
1549
01:31:26,981 --> 01:31:27,356
Can't understand what I mean
You soon will
1550
01:31:27,356 --> 01:31:27,439
Can't understand what I mean
You soon will
1551
01:31:27,439 --> 01:31:28,273
Can't understand what I mean
You soon will
1552
01:31:28,357 --> 01:31:30,233
It's been one week
since you looked at me
1553
01:31:30,317 --> 01:31:32,068
Dropped your arms to
the side and said, I'm sorry
1554
01:31:32,152 --> 01:31:36,406
Hello to your mother your
brother significant other
1555
01:31:36,490 --> 01:31:40,990
I am the summertime
1556
01:31:41,078 --> 01:31:45,332
And I'm here
to free your mind
1557
01:31:46,667 --> 01:31:50,587
Kick off your shoes the blues
and use anything but your mind
1558
01:31:50,671 --> 01:31:55,171
'Cause this is
the summertime
1559
01:31:55,509 --> 01:32:00,009
And it's here
to free your mind
1560
01:32:01,265 --> 01:32:05,765
How many other people
can you save today?
1561
01:32:06,061 --> 01:32:10,561
Don't you think it's high
time that you sail away?
1562
01:32:10,983 --> 01:32:15,483
Leave today
Don't fall behind
1563
01:32:15,863 --> 01:32:19,950
Try something new Turn
into you if only for a short time
1564
01:32:20,034 --> 01:32:24,534
I am the summertime
1565
01:32:24,705 --> 01:32:29,205
And I'm here
to free your mind
1566
01:32:39,386 --> 01:32:41,846
Love is tragic
Love is bold
1567
01:32:41,930 --> 01:32:45,642
You will always do
what you are told
1568
01:32:49,772 --> 01:32:52,316
Love is hard
Love is strong
1569
01:32:52,399 --> 01:32:55,568
You will never say
that you were wrong
1570
01:33:00,199 --> 01:33:02,826
I don't know
when I got bitter
1571
01:33:02,910 --> 01:33:07,410
Love is surely better
when it's gone
1572
01:33:09,291 --> 01:33:11,918
'Cause you wanted more
1573
01:33:12,002 --> 01:33:14,504
More than I could give
1574
01:33:14,588 --> 01:33:17,173
More than I could handle
1575
01:33:17,257 --> 01:33:19,968
And a life
that I can't live
1576
01:33:20,052 --> 01:33:22,512
You wanted more
1577
01:33:22,596 --> 01:33:25,140
More than I could bear
1578
01:33:25,224 --> 01:33:27,643
More than I could offer
1579
01:33:27,726 --> 01:33:31,271
And a love
that isn't there
1580
01:33:42,366 --> 01:33:45,035
Love is color
Love is love
1581
01:33:45,119 --> 01:33:48,205
Love is never saying
you're too proud
1582
01:33:52,835 --> 01:33:55,462
Love is trusting
Love is honest
1583
01:33:55,546 --> 01:33:58,840
Love is not a hand
that holds you down
1584
01:34:03,303 --> 01:34:05,888
I don't know
when I got bitter
1585
01:34:05,973 --> 01:34:10,473
Love is surely
better when it's gone
1586
01:34:12,437 --> 01:34:14,939
'Cause you wanted more
1587
01:34:15,023 --> 01:34:17,567
More than I could give
1588
01:34:17,651 --> 01:34:20,320
More than I could handle
1589
01:34:20,404 --> 01:34:22,989
And a life
that I can't live
1590
01:34:23,073 --> 01:34:25,533
You wanted more
1591
01:34:25,617 --> 01:34:28,244
More than I could bear
1592
01:34:28,328 --> 01:34:30,830
More than I could offer
1593
01:34:30,914 --> 01:34:35,126
And a love
that isn't there
1594
01:34:37,754 --> 01:34:41,549
I gotta pick me up
when I am down
1595
01:34:43,135 --> 01:34:46,680
I gotta get my feet back
on the ground
1596
01:34:48,599 --> 01:34:53,099
I gotta pick me up
when I am down
1597
01:35:04,281 --> 01:35:06,700
I don't know
when I got bitter
1598
01:35:06,783 --> 01:35:11,283
But love is surely better
when it's gone
1599
01:35:13,248 --> 01:35:15,792
'Cause you wanted more
1600
01:35:15,876 --> 01:35:18,378
More than I could give
1601
01:35:18,462 --> 01:35:20,589
More than I could handle
1602
01:35:20,672 --> 01:35:23,925
And a life
that I can't live
1603
01:35:24,009 --> 01:35:26,219
You wanted more
118560
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof