All language subtitles for Just Shoot Me s07e05 Da Sister Who Loved Dimauro

Hey. Saw you leave the party with Vicky
last night, huh?

Yes, I did. It was incredible.

All right, you finally hooked up. I know
what that's like.

Come here, baby. Your whiskers are so
soft. Let's do a little cat scratch

Oh, yeah. Bat that mouse around. Kill it
and bat it around.

We didn't sleep together.

We stayed up all night talking. We made
a real connection.

She told me I'm a good listener.

Oh, great. Then you'll be able to hear
this. You're a loser.

Oh, I get why you're being so hostile.

Because tonight, while I'm with Vicki
making my final move, you're going to be

home alone, your broken dreams in your
footsie pajamas.

It's an orthopedic jumpsuit.

He really cut you off at the knees.
Yeah, now he's on top of my revenge

Congratulations, Justin Timberlake. You
live to see another day.

Morning, Finch.

Nina. Okay. Hey.

Eyes a little puffy, hair a little
tussled. Someone got a little last

Actually, I was out with Elliot.

Oh, sweetie, that's not something we
brag about here. I'm not interested in

Elliot that way. We're buddies.

Oh.

Just buddies.

Not what Elliot thinks.

Well,

you know, as a friend, you could warn
him and save him from a devastating

humiliation. Yes.

Let's get this thing going. Dad, I wish
you would go home. You just had foot

surgery. You should be recuperating. I
don't need to recuperate. I'm just going

to tough this thing out.

Dennis, what's wrong?

Your toe hurts.

It'll be fine.

Elliot, stop fidgeting. It hurts my toe.

Elliot, stop talking.

You're in agony.

How are you going to work?

I gave you some of my pain medication,
but it would totally screw up my

night.

It's just going to get worse if you stay
on it. All right. I'll go home. But I

want constant updates.

The old man's gone.

The old man's gone.

The old man's gone.

Wow.

So this is very cool.

My little sister. This has really hit
the big time.

Yeah, it is pretty nice, huh?

What, you think you're better than me
now?

Well, you're the little princess and I'm
the big loser of the family. No, I

didn't say that. I'm just poking you
itty -bitties.

Hey, who owns the Tom Petty's all?

I work here, so if you could just dial
it down a little bit, okay?

This is Finch and Nina.

This is my sister, Rhonda Ferraro.

Well, there's string cheese.

You're a tasty little treat, aren't you?

Okay.

Yes, Lynn, your ribs are showing.

Oh, not all of them. I left two with the
doctor in Mexico.

Anyways, I gotta get going.

You.

I'd like to roll you up and put you in
my sock drawer.

So I'm sorry about my sister.

I wasn't scared. I wasn't.

She's in a really weird place right now.
I mean, between you and me, she's had

some bad luck with men.

The ones buried beneath the house are
starting to stink. I just really wish

could meet a nice guy.

Hey, do you think Elliot would be
interested?

Oh, Nina, do you think Elliot would be
interested?

In a firecracker like that? I mean,
she's a little colorful.

Colorful? Oh, she's a rainbow.

I think it's a perfect match.

You're going out with Elliot tonight,
right? Why don't you bring her along?

That's a great idea. I'm going to go
tell him. No, no, I'll tell him. I'll

him. Why?

Why? I'll tell you why.

Oh, he's weird about set -ups? He's
weird about set -ups. Oh, you're a good

friend. I'm the best.

Hey, dude.

See me talking to Vicki? I just got some
info that's going to put you over the

top. Tell me.

You know, I would, but you wounded me
deeply, and that is something I cannot

forgive.

I don't have much, sir, but I do have my
pride. That is one thing that I can

hold on to. I have $11. All right,
here's what's going on.

Vicki's going to bring her sister on
your date tonight.

Why? Why? What, is she, like, testing
me? Testing works.

Yeah, she's testing you.

Uh, you see...

She loves her sister and she really
wants her approval.

Okay, so all I have to do is be nice to
the sister and I'm in with Vicki.

No, buddy, you gotta be more than nice.

Woo the sister.

Play it like you're on a date with the
sister. Yeah, I think this is great.

This is great. You know what?

You know, a lot of people think you're a
devious bastard, but you're a good

friend.

Wait.

Wait, there's something I should tell
you.

Her sister's really shy, so get her
boozed up.

I've been relaxed around here since Jack
left, or is that just the gin talking?

Could be the gin.

Could be the brandy you had before the
gin.

Sprinkle. Bam!

What's this about?

Well, you're always taking swipes at me.
I thought it was time to start firing

them back. Don't mess with me, Maya. I
will eat you alive.

Then throw me up five minutes later?

Bam!

Hey, by the way, a guy named Andre is on
his way up. Oh!

Andre Delacroix.

Masseuse to the stars. Having a session
with him is like being touched by the

hands of God.

Except that God doesn't spend that much
time on your thigh.

You're going to get a massage in the
office? Jack would kill you. Yes, but

isn't here, is he?

Hello, everyone!

Oh, look!

Jack sent us a little video of himself.

I knew the old bastard was losing it.

I can hear you, Nina.

Vicki said that.

I can see you, too.

Dad, what are you doing? I'm going to
supervise from home today.

One of my catalogs had all these great
two -way conferencing gadgets.

Hi, I'm Andre. I'm looking for Nina Van
Horn.

Who's that?

Uh, delivery man. He's delivering my
purse.

It looks enormous.

Oh, you know what? They're all the rage
in Milan, Jack. Big as in.

It's almost big enough to fit your
makeup. Bounce, bounce. Count it!

Nina, what's going on? Nothing, nothing.
You know, in fact, I don't think I

really want this purse. I mean, the only
way I could make it work is to have an

enormous pair of shoes.

Anyway, here. Go on, delivery man. Just
take that away.

All right. You seem to be under control.

Now, Dennis.

Yeah. Wheel me over to accounting. I
want to chat up that new receptionist.

Okay.

Hey, hey, hey, not so fast. I don't want
to seem too eager.

So, Mick Jagger turns to the woman and
says, Tomorrow must have eaten it. He

jelly all over his face.

Jelly!

Awkward? No, I'm thrilled that you set
this up. I can't tell you how great it

to meet Rhonda.

Is he for real?

Are you for real? Actually, that hurts a
little.

Come on, Sally.

What do you want? Take you to the dance?
Put you in a dress?

I know you'd like it.

Oh, boy.

She is great. This is fun.

Big fun.

I gotta tell you, you'd be in a really
good sport here, Ali. That's me.

All right. I'm going to get some more
drinks, okay?

I'm going to get some more.

Things are going great over there,
buddy. Oh, dude, my nipples are swelling

like golf tees.

Still living as an animal. I don't know
if I can take any more of this. Hey,

don't give up now. You're almost there.

I'll tell you what, I swear, when they
leave here, Rhonda's going to tell Vicki

you're the greatest guy in the world.
Just keep the charm going.

All right, great, great. Okay, here I
go. Here I go.

Like a light bulb in a crew neck. Go,
go.

All right.

Drinks for the lovely ladies.

Rhonda would like to apologize for, as
she puts it, yanking your nips.

Apparently, I was emasculating you. I'm
just saying that not every guy likes

that. Oh, so now you're going to
embarrass me in front of your friends.

embarrassing you? You were trying to
milk him.

Let's just cut to the chase.

What do you want from this thing,
Elliot?

Well, um...

I've got to be honest.

I've dated a lot of women, but nothing
serious for a long time. I mean, maybe I

haven't wanted to put myself out there,
but I feel like I'm ready now because I

finally met someone special.

Thanks to you, I was stuck with Rhonda
all night.

Well, you know, that's funny, because
you wanted Vicky, but you wound up

I'm going to go straighten this out with
Vicky right now.

Hey, hey, can I talk to you for a
second? It's about Rhonda. Oh, no need

thank me. I saw how you two hit it off,
and I'm thrilled. Yeah, about that, I

just... She has been with so many jerks,
but to know that she's with a really

good guy, someone who's not going to
lead a Rhonda and break her heart...

That means a lot to me. Well, naturally,
I would never, ever want to hurt her.

Oh, I know, I know, because you're a
sweet person.

And between you and me, when you said
all that stuff about being ready for

something real, it was all I could do
not to jump on you myself.

I mean, where am I ever going to find a
guy like you?

Right here.

But I'm dating your sister.

Are you happy Vicky finally likes me and
I'm stuck with her sister? Thanks to

you, my life sucks.

Buddy, I can't take all the credit. You
had a pretty good head start.

If I dump Rhonda now, Vicky's going to
hate me. So the only way out is for

Rhonda to dump me.

All right, man.

You need a guy to steal her away.

And I mean a ladies' man, a player.

All right? A real stud.

I'm flattered, boys, but I'm laid up.

Oh, thank you so much for rescheduling.
I know how busy you are. Oh, no problem.

Here we go.

Whoa.

I was just preparing.

So was I.

Wait. Oh, good God.

Stop teasing me and lay those gigantic
hands on me. I left my oils out at the

conference table. Well, do it without
oils. We don't need those stupid oils.

Oh, it's much better with oil.

I'll get the oils. No, no, no, no, no.

I'll get the oils. No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no. My boss's big, giant,

-seeing head is out there being wheeled
around. Well, you know what that's like.

First you put in the articles, then you
put in the ads.

And where the hell is Nina? Is she back
from lunch? I mean, where does she get

off taking a two -and -a -half -hour
lunch?

And I bet she didn't do any of the
things I asked her for.

What have you been up to, you old
rascal?

Well, if you'll excuse me, I have some
work to finish.

No, I want you to stay out here with
Maya.

Hey, you looking for Elliot?

Yeah, Elliot. He's, uh, he's indisposed
at the moment. Remember me?

Dee Finch.

What's the D stand for?

Dennis. As in, not if, but when it's.

Are you hitting on me?

What if I am?

I'm seeing your friend.

You fling behind your buddy's back just
to get a little piece of something

-something? Yes, ma 'am.

Your place.

Eight o 'clock.

That works for me.

I don't care what works for you, you
little gerbil.

I'm driving this train here, and you're
just shoveling coal.

And if you don't keep it hot enough, I
will dump your scrawny ass onto the

tracks like the worthless piece of
garbage that you are.

I don't know if there's a heaven, but if
there is, they're one angel short.

Nina, the bottom line is massages are
inappropriate during the workday.

Well, if it makes you feel any better,
when I got back to my office, Andre was

gone, and he's impossible to get.

Oh, that's good.

Oh, yeah, you're right, Andre. It is
better with the oils.

posture is horrendous and lay off the
donuts. They're for everybody.

That's it. See you Monday.

Don't you dare!

I had this one put in during lunch.
Pretty cool,

huh? No, it's incredibly invasive.

How would you like someone spying over
your shoulder all day long watching your

every move? It's creepy!

It is creepy, isn't it?

some crazed big brother.

What am I doing?

I'm home for a day and I've lost my
mind. I'm completely out of control.

You haven't lost your mind.

Hit the red button.

I just think you need to let go a little
bit.

I know.

Maybe I just don't want people to get
the idea that the office works fine

without me.

Oh, come on.

You know that that's not going to
happen.

You're the heart of this magazine. We
couldn't do it without you.

Oh, thanks.

Hey, give your old man a hug. Oh, God.

Come on. Give me a hug.

You know, this is actually kind of great
because we never get to talk, you know,

just you and me. And, um, I know we've
been through this before, but

why did you really leave mom?

Well, that's it. I'm taking off early. I
can't remember the last time I was this

disappointed. When Roosevelt got
elected, Teddy, booyah!

Maya, I don't like this color on you.

Oh, what, that I've started to stand up
for myself?

No, dear, brown. You look like a frumpy
raisinette.

That was unnecessary.

Oh, like the other half of your bed?

Order has been restored!

Gonda went off with Finch?

You must be crushed. What a horrible
thing to have happen to you. Yeah, it

pretty rough.

So you up for margaritas?

Wait, aren't you upset?

Oh, oh, of course. I'm heartbroken. I
just don't want to seem weak in front of

you. It's okay, Elliot.

I like a man who's not afraid to show
emotion.

I like you so much.

Welcome to the jungle, baby. Hope you
got your shots.

Nice couch.

Yeah, thanks.

Couldn't pull the other half out of the
river.

So I'll set the mood with some tunes.

How'd that get in there?

Repeat after me.

I love myself.

I'm as tall as I feel.

Oh, there's a spanky groove.

Why don't you park it down here next to
Daddy?

First off, I'm the Daddy.

Oh?

Well, Daddy, what do you want me to do?

I'll tell you what you're going to do,
you little elf.

You're going to put on your apron, climb
up your little tree, and bake me some

cookies. All right.

I'll put on my pointy hat and your
little oven mitts.

Good. Then I'm going to crush those
cookies and make you crawl around in the

crumbs.

Okay.

And then I'm going to put a little leash
on you.

Because you're my dog.

What's that?

That's right.

Your new name is Rags.

Here, Rags. Here, boy.

Come and eat your little rubber pork
chop.

Okay, I don't know if I want to be the
dog.

Oh, are you going to get bad now?

Oh, I'm going to cuff you to the steam
pipe and smack your ass with the Sunday

Times. Oh, bad book. Bad book.

Okay, that's it. I'm out. This is a bad
plan.

What plan?

What plan?

The one where Elliot likes Vicki, your
sister, and I'm supposed to take you off

his hands.

You lying little creep.

You don't deserve to be my dog.

Repeat after me.

I'm a special person.

I'm a special person.

Hey, thanks for going out with me.

Well, I care about you.

I might start crying again. But you like
that in a man, right?

Less than less.

Come on, let's go.

There he is.

What the hell is wrong with you?

Rhonda, what happened?

Oh, I'll tell you what happened. This
guy handed me off to his puny little

friend. What?

That's right.

So he could hit on you.

Is that true?

Well, it's complicated.

I mean, there are several underlying
things.

I'm in a really bad place right now.

That's it. We're out of here. Wait,
wait, wait.

I need to say something.

Listen, there's been some
misunderstandings tonight, but I just

it all came from a good place.

Now, come on, Vicki, you're hot, you
look easy, and Elliot wanted to get

All right?

Seriously. Now, sure, he may have
manipulated the situation, lied a little

to get you into bed, but there was no
disrespect.

Okay, so why don't you crazy kids put
all this ugliness behind you and get it

on?

You both disgust me.

I know where you live.

Not after tomorrow, weirdo.

I don't get it.

Why does it have to be so hard to meet
that special someone?

I don't know, brother.

I do not know.