Original subtitles

Good morning, sir.

Welcome to Williamsburg Savings Bank.

Let me just grab a pager for you here, and we'll get you to sit with a banking

professional as soon as one becomes available.

What happens with this?

Oh, it's going to light up and vibrate. The red lights spin around in a circle.

You won't be able to miss it.

Where do I wait?

The guest lounge.

We're ready for you now.

I'm seeing an overdrawn balance in your daily checking.

Seems like your direct deposits haven't been received in a few months from...

Wexler Steel.

Yeah, I've been finding them for weeks. I couldn't get a straight answer.

And how about this, sir?

A foreclosure notice.

Ah, the yellow one.

So you must be in default.

My mortgage payment tripled overnight.

You are on our teaser rate promo, which expired back in January. That's why it's

called a teaser rate. It doesn't last.

Makes sense. The new rate is quite a bit higher, so the monthly mortgage payment

jumped up.

And we are required to disclose that possibility at the time of the refi. You

did? I did what?

You sold me this crap.

Joe Hardy.

I know. Let me just look at my notes here.

Terms disclosed.

I personally disclosed the possibility of a rate hike during your refi.

Do you remember that?

You told me that the odds on the rate going past the prime rate were

extraordinary. But possible.

But you sold me extraordinary.

But the possible was disclosed.

Listen, Chuck, my granddaughter and my daughter, they live with me. She's the

nurse's age and low pay and all that. She wanted a kid to go to a better

so they moved in with me.

Lots of people doing that.

Yeah, so you see, I can't lose my house.

Not to worry.

You're on the yellow note.

The red one.

It's more weighty.

Can I talk to someone else?

Who? Someone smarter.

Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for your attention.

We've come to make a withdrawal.

Aside from the tellers, we invite you to lie down on the floor, face up, and

hold your arms and legs in the air like a pussycat.

Everybody down!

Tellers, please do not be foolish enough to trigger the silent alarm.

The last people we want here would be the police.

That would be messy, no?

Put them up!

What? Oh, my God. What did I do? I followed them. Hey! What did I do? I

them. Just follow procedure.

Just stay calm. Stay calm. Follow procedure. Hey, you could have got

shot. Gentlemen, it's best to remain silent.

I'm cramping.

Relax, please. You can sit up.

Hey, no, not you.

Pussycat.

Keep stuffing it in there. Let's go. Come on.

You could have this.

I'm sorry, you're a casualty of a corrupt system that no longer serves the

people. Yeah, I've been banking it for 40 years.

You're just an account number.

It's not much, but it's all yours.

No, my friend, not from you.

It is a culture's duty to take care of its elderly.

Chuck here couldn't give a crap.

Chuck!

Are you Chuck?

Yeah.

Are you the one taking this man's house?

I'm not personally... Give me your wallet!

I have plenty of stuff here. Cash?

It's a gym membership. Take it. I never go.

Pussy in second!

Pussy cash!

Shut up!

I'm happy to say our time together has ended.

Please do not call the police for 90 seconds.

A shootout never has a happy ending.

Oh, to make a pill for that.

gang tattoo to me.

Very detailed.

I imagine the artist did them all, so if you find the tattoo parlor, then you'll

find the artist and you've got yourself a bank robber.

Sounds pretty standard to me.

Right. Well, thanks a lot, old -timer. You know, we're going to get you an

application. Hey, listen, I watch this TV show called Law and Order, and they

solve crimes much quicker than you do.

You should tune in.

Well, you know, in the real world, solving crimes takes a little longer

one -hour television show.

Well, I guess this wraps it up for us, Mr.

Harding. If we need any additional information, then we'll get in contact

you. Or you'll need my address and phone number. Not necessary.

We'll find you.

That's what we do.

So, what do they look like?

Hard to tell. They had masks on.

I got close to one. He was a male, about six feet. And he had this tattoo

wrapped around his neck that I told you about.

You know you find the tattoo artist.

You find the criminal.

Exactly. That's what I told them. I'm sure you're not supposed to be talking

about all of this.

It must have been so cool being in the middle of a heist. Crime is not cool,

babe.

He could have been shot.

Or worse.

What's worse than being shot?

Being shot twice.

This kind of detail is traditionally indicative of gang affiliation.

We believe these individuals use the same tattoo artist.

If we could find this artist, then we could find our perp.

It's pretty standard stuff, really.

Hey, that's what we said.

Language.

Bingo.

The three men walked off with approximately $1 .6 million.

The FBI and the NYPD are reporting no leads at this time.

So what? Nobody gets hurt except the insurance company, and they'll be fine.

They were as cool as cucumbers, Jim. They choreographed it down to the

like a dance.

Yeah, a conga line right in the prison.

Are we going to play or what?

Ask the man in charge.

Milton? Milton?

Who are we rolling with on two?

Oh. Oh.

G -52.

If I ever get that bad, shoot me.

Oh.

Did you get one of these?

It came straight if I had mail.

Yes, sir.

You ever get good news that needed a signature?

You contact anybody down at the plant?

Not yet, but we'll find out what's going on.

I need my pension money.

Oh, you tell me about it.

I have some very important to say.

G -52.

This don't help the elderly.

Now, at the time...

Of our merger, Semtec had no intention of shuttering U .S. operations.

However, with the demand for specialty parts way down and the cost of

in this country rising steadily, they have made the decision to move

all manufacturing to Vietnam.

The Wexler's stateside operations.

will be phased out over the next 30 days.

Guys, I understand this is harsh news. I can only address you in an orderly

fashion.

Excuse me, Mr. Lewis.

Hi, Joe.

What is this about?

Semtec Steel has frozen all pension payments during this transitional

What does that mean, Frozen?

Wexler maintained a fund to honor all pre -merger pension plans, which was

eventually to be married with the new pension fund under the new labor

Well, guys, can you say that in English?

Right!

No U .S. operations, no fiscal responsibility for Semtec. The pension

being dissolved.

you respect it donald 30 years of hard work means shit to you people

without my pension money i can't even pay

rent this month get a lawyer and sue to piss out of it should we be dead by the

time the settlement comes in which would suit them just fine when did coffee go

to two dollars a decade ago god forbid you get extra form on the top you have

make payments Let's leave at 20%. Okay, good.

Now she can take a cruise.

Okay, boys. I got a half a rhubarb left. We got the blueberry crumble, just a

little stale. And I got the mud pie.

So, what's it gonna be?

Not today, thank you.

No pie?

We're watching our waistlines.

Plus, we're shit broke.

Okay. Don't tie up my table all day. I gotta make a living here.

Did I tell you those guys in the bank?

Had machine guns.

You told us six times already.

It keeps going in my head.

Over and over.

Maybe you're having a stroke.

Here you go, boys.

Always have your pie.

Life is short.

Well, thanks for the reminder.

She's right, you know. We should be having our pie and eating it.

We've earned that much, at least.

Gentlemen, good evening. Good evening.

Welcome to what is essentially the last rose ceremony.

Caitlin, this is the final rose tonight.

Chicken count, Einstein.

My heart is beating out of my chest.

This week was incredible.

Sean's boring, and Nick's a man -whore.

Monogamy's an outdated concept.

I am in love, and that's so exciting.

Ben. The only choice she's got.

She's not going to move to a farm in those heels.

She's kissed them all.

With her tongue.

Done the whole cast that way. She's a walking venereal disease.

How everything went has made my decision feel like almost impossible.

Caitlin, close your mouth.

No.

God! Turn it off. It's a travesty.

They never learn.

I'm going home and sort out my bills.

Tomorrow, gents, that was a great meal tonight.

What you can do with frozen fish is admirable.

Best garlic bread I ever had. And that combination of paprika and garlic.

Oh, fantastic.

Actually, I think it was the mold.

All right. Good night.

Joe? What?

We'll be all right?

Sure we will.

It always works out in the end.

And then you die.

Oh, thanks for the inspiration, Albert.

Good night, all. I'll see you tomorrow.

Good night, Joe. Good night.

Dallas Thompson.

Hey, Willie. How you feeling?

Partly cloudy, Doc.

Partly cloudy.

Well, I'm not going to lie to you.

You can.

Not for mine.

The dialysis is working marginally. You know, a kidney is all that's going to

get you well.

I'll look on eBay.

You're way down the list. It's partially your age. It's partially your

insurance. It's partially kidneys that aren't that easy to come by.

Yeah. Everybody wants to hold on to that.

Have you talked to your daughter, your friends?

It's common to find a donor in your circles.

And that's often the best match anyway.

I'll talk to them.

Sooner than later.

So what are we talking about?

We're talking about much sooner than later.

Hello? You get your presents, Papa?

You send something?

Wait a minute. The postman brought me this box right here. But I can't be it.

That's it. That's it. Open it already.

All right. All right. Hold your horses. I'm old.

Oh, my goodness.

This is the ugliest shirt I've ever seen.

Papa.

All right.

Let's see what else is down in here.

You're getting real big, Kay.

Grew an inch in a month, Papa.

Hey, tell your mom.

that her career isn't as important as seeing her family.

Ezra!

Ezra!

You've got to stop this. I can't listen anymore.

I've been practicing.

Yeah, but it doesn't matter because you get worse every week. It's kind of a

miracle. I don't know how you do it.

So what's the point? You're no good.

You don't like it. You're not going to be a professional.

You want to end up like me, working in a factory, and every two months getting a

gig for 40 bucks at some dive?

You don't want that.

I don't even like this thing. No.

and it doesn't like you either. Trust me, I'm doing you a favor. You'll thank

for this.

Thank you, sir.

Oh, you're very welcome.

I want to be a dancer, like Beyonce.

Well, it's none of my business.

Okay.

All right, good.

All right, get off.

Get off me.

Get off.

I'll go find your grandma. She's still got to pay me for the session.

You got to think of it like putting down a horse.

Sometimes it's the kindest, most ethical thing you can do.

Well, thank you for being so honest with me.

I really appreciate your candor.

Well, your grandson hasn't got a musical bone in his body.

I know.

It was so painful listening in the other room.

And I had to sit across from him.

Okay. Al. Yeah. I never told you this, but I've seen you perform at your time.

In the West Village with Stan Getz, 1977.

It was stunning.

You saw me play with Getz? Sure did.

What, are you following me?

No.

I was following the music.

Hey,

I'll see you at the store, okay? See you at the store.

Yep. All right.

At some point, I'm going to have to start walking home on my own.

I'm 14.

Not on my watch, lovey.

This neighborhood is not the same as it was 40 years ago.

Right. It's safer and more gentrified.

Bam. And what is this?

My biology test.

Another day, another A.

Well done, kiddo.

Almost there.

Almost where?

You said, and I quote, you get straight A if you get a puppy.

I like your confidence.

Must have got that from you, young man.

Not bad, kiddo.

Not bad at all.

Happy birthday, young man.

I didn't expect you broke bastards to get me anything.

Temper, you're enthusiastic.

It's not much.

That's just what I needed.

One can't get enough time.

Take a look at that cute picture.

Oh, yeah.

My little K.

When you die, you can will it over as a memento.

Thanks, Al. I'm sure she'll want a picture of herself on a watch from her

grandpa.

Look at that.

It's really something.

You bet, kid.

This corn is from World War II.

Corn?

I thought this was... I don't know what I thought it was.

I think I may rub a bank.

Over there?

I'm thinking of rubbing a bank.

Oh.

I'm thinking about buying a Ferrari.

I just got daft about a Knicks. Good week for everybody, huh? Good week.

They're taking my house.

Huh?

They're taking my house.

I've got 30 days.

Who's taking your house?

The bank.

You're taking your house and you didn't tell us? What are you going to do, lend

me money? We're all broke, the three of us combined.

These banks practically destroyed this country.

They crushed a lot of people's dreams.

And nothing ever happened to them.

We're three old guys, we hit a bank, we get away with it. We retire with

dignity.

Worst comes to the worst, we get caught, we go to bed.

Three meals a day.

And better health care than we get now.

You... You're talking about us?

Us and you?

Yeah, I mean, if a gang of thugs can do it, it can't be that hard.

You're out of your friggin' mind.

You have spent 20 years waiting to die, Al.

With no life and no purpose.

And robbing a bank is going to give me a purpose.

It will give us money.

Willie would be able to get on a plane and go and see his granddaughter.

It's a little hard to get the plane out of prison, Joe.

We won't get caught.

They didn't get caught.

Well, they were young. They were fast.

We've got skills, experience, smarts, arthritis, gout, shingles.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday.

Make a wish, buddy.

I'm just lying here thinking about all of the birthday wishes that I've had

the years.

And how many of them I've kept secret.

And none of them ever came true.

They never seem to pay out.

So I figure I'm going to tell you this one, John.

I mean, what's the worst that can happen? A whole bunch of nothing, right?

Fire away, Willie.

I want to live better than I am.

I want to see my family more than once a year.

And from here on in, I want to have a piece of pie whenever the hell I want a

piece of pie. You know what I mean?

Hear, hear.

You were serious today.

I think so.

The thing is, we have nothing to lose.

I'm not a thief, Joe.

Neither am I.

We pick exactly what's on on the pension, right?

Well, that's all I want.

Not a penny more.

My word.

Wake Al up.

Hold on.

Al?

Al?

Albert? Huh? Pick up the phone.

Who died?

Nobody died, it's Joe.

I don't talk to criminals.

You heard that?

Hang up.

I'll call him back.

What do you want?

The thing is, what do you want, Al?

You want to drift off into the sunset?

Or do you want to go out with a bang?

I don't have a problem with dying. I just don't want to do it in prison.

Nobody's going to prison.

What exactly is happening here?

Willie's in.

You're both out of your minds.

Sleep on it, Al. I don't need to sleep on anything. I'm not a bank robber.

Neither are you or you, Willie.

What? Why'd you pick up the phone?

Because it was ringing.

Because you're interested.

What, are you my psychiatrist now?

More like a psychic.

Well, then you know I'm going to hang up now.

I'll see you tomorrow, Al.

Sweet dreams.

And don't call back.

All right, Willie, it's time to walk before we run.

These goddamn expiration dates are so small, they want you to go blind.

Take these. I've got two for one.

All good. Chicken thighs are on special. I can make a cordon bleu.

Mets or Yankees? Don't insult me.

Ah, nice hats.

We got business here, Al.

Okay. What do you mean?

Give me that list.

What are you doing?

Wait here.

We'll be right back.

What are you doing with my lift?

Why did you rip up my lift?

Why should I wait in the car?

Wait in the bloody car.

Why?

I don't want to stay in the car. It's hot in here.

Joe, I'm going to get a roast.

We need the chicken. It's codon bleu. I don't want codon bleu. Stick to the

plan.

Ah, welcome to value.

Hello, Al.

Hi, Annie.

What are you shopping for?

Chicken codon bleu. Was the plan, but the plan seems to be changing.

I gotta get some chicken thighs.

Oh, let me help you.

Give me

the

big one.

The whole thing?

The whole damn thing.

You're the boss.

Jenny, just let me have the thing.

Come on, you have your own work to do now.

No, no, no, no, no.

It's my job. There's no problem.

Let's see, there's a double coupon and a flyer. Talk about the same as thighs,

but see, these are breasts.

And breasts are better than thighs, don't you think?

You can go either way.

Oh, ham.

So good.

Do you like ham?

Okay.

This will go perfectly with... I mean, if you want company, it's a big bottle.

I got to tell you, you're a terrific person, but I know what you're doing.

You're wasting your time. I don't want to have a relationship with anybody.

I wasn't offering one. Good. Great.

Then we'll see eye to eye.

Security to ethnic foods, please.

We'll talk about this later.

I look forward to it.

We'll be right back.

Where the fuck is my basket?

Willie,

Willie.

How's it going?

I've got a new getaway car.

Where the hell did you get that thing?

I stole it.

Jump in the basket.

Who the hell do you think I am? E .T.? Willie, jump in the bloody basket. I'm

not getting in no bloody basket.

He's guiding on us.

Hey, you!

Stop right there.

Hey! Halt!

Halt! What are you chasing me for?

Halt! I heard you the first time.

Don't make me tell you.

This is not an admission of guilt.

I'm just tired.

We've got to get rid of some white.

Get rid of that damn pork loin.

What?

What's that?

Flower. Flower. Give me the flower.

I think we can make the light.

No, no, no, no. You're not going to make the light, Joe. You're not going to

make the light. I'm dying.

Joe, you can't make the light. We can make the light.

We're going to do it.

You were going to make a cordon bleu with chicken thighs?

That's a crime in and of itself.

I have nothing to say for myself.

Look what you did to Cindy.

Now she's looking like a Colombian drug mule.

Never in all my years has anybody ever walked off with a whole pork loin.

What would your mama say?

Go big or go home.

Had to be the brother.

And why were you running? You didn't see anything?

Because your stormtrooper here was chasing me. No, they were chasing your

friend. He was chasing me. When somebody chases me, I run. That's the way it

works.

Look, you guys are old.

I'm going to be there in... 40 or 50 years. I get it.

Here.

Here's a coupon.

We double them on Tuesday, but I'm sure you already know that.

So don't steal.

It's wrong.

But if you do steal, don't steal from Value Town.

Yeah, a couple of great friends I got. You just made me an accomplice to a

robbery. We never asked you to do anything.

I drive you there, I drive you back, that makes me a getaway driver. Oh,

flatter yourself. You're driving like my grandmother. She drove a horse and

buggy. Oh, that's a good one.

Just so that you can walk home.

Don't touch my car, don't get in the car.

You're not going to make us walk.

Hell, I'm not.

Oh, boy, you guys are going to be great bank robbers. You just got busted

robbing Value Town.

Ho, ho!

I hate when he's right.

We're gonna need professional help.

You think?

Oh, yeah.

We might as well turn ourselves in now.

You know any criminals?

I know a lowlife.

I know it's you, Murphy.

What are you doing here, Joe?

I've come about a child support. You're not paying.

Didn't I lose you in the divorce, Joe?

Hit the buzzer.

Maui Waui.

Bad bitch.

Blueberry Kush.

OG Kush.

How is this legal?

Gentlemen, prohibition is over.

Marijuana has superior medical benefits.

It's good for all kinds of situations.

Anxiety, pain, seizures, stress, anxiety, pain,

seizures, stress, anxiety, pain, seizures.

What is your situation?

Right now, anxiety.

Listen, Joe, not to be uncool to family and such.

Ex -family.

As you say, but...

What do you want from me, man?

We have this project and we're looking for help.

What kind of project?

Oh, well, we'd rather not say.

Well, that makes it harder for me to help you.

We need to find the type of people who do bad things.

What makes you think that I would know people like that?

Well, I figure your kind move in the same circles.

My kind?

Entrepreneurs? No, lowlifes, deadbeats, gangster types.

See, I'm sure that you could point us in the right direction.

He's thinking.

Looks painful.

I know it looks it, but I've seen him do it before.

It's his drugs, you know.

Oh, yeah, of course.

Oh, this stupid bitch.

I wish I could tase his old ass.

Because of that plant.

Eggplant. Hey, you.

Hi, Annie.

Hi. You're here every day. Don't you get a day off?

No, every day. Man, tough schedule.

Mmm.

What are you going to do with this eggplant?

Let's think about it right this week.

Mmm. I like to slice it paper thin for parmesan.

You know, it soaks up all the juices.

Okay, sounds good. You will never, ever taste a better one.

I'm sure. Listen, I think you're sweet. I find you very attractive. Oh, you

think I'm attractive? I think that's wonderful.

But you're not looking for a relationship, is that right? That's

Ah, well, you have made that perfectly clear, Al.

You want to have dinner some night?

What do I have to do? I just don't think you hear me. Oh, I hear you. I hear you

real good.

You know what I think?

I think we owe it to ourselves to live every single day that we have.

I feel that I really want to get to know you better, share a meal with you.

What?

What is it, baby?

I have a roommate.

I have my own place.

Annie. Yeah?

You make a hell of an eggplant parmesan.

Thank you.

World class.

Thank you.

Scrambled eggs, turkey sausage, hash browns, toast and coffee, please.

Good morning, Missy. Your hair looks nice. Did you get your hair cut? Oh,

I did.

And you know what I'm in the mood for? I don't know. Well, what?

Missy, you look gorgeous. You smell fantastic.

Now go get me some food because I'm starving to death.

Rick, we'll like it.

Didn't think you'd be joining us today.

I'm too old for grudges.

I'd never stopped you. Talk amongst yourselves.

Oh, yeah.

It's in print.

Wexler's pensioners fund and assets to be distributed to current debtors.

They're using our retirement money to pay utility bills.

And that isn't all.

Check this.

Williamsburg Savings Bank... will manage the liquidation of the fund and the

restructuring of Wexler's corporate debt.

It's my bank. It's my bank.

It's my bank.

They're stealing our goddamn pension. That's what it says.

Forty years I worked for that goddamn company, and now they're stealing our

pension. Get it out of here. I'm not hungry.

You want to take it home for go? No, no, leave it here.

Nobody's taking anything from me anymore.

You know something, Al? You're complicated today. I'm not coming back

table. And no coin.

Not a laundromat.

I'm in.

I want to rob that bank.

It's a good place, isn't it?

Well, how do we start?

We get in touch with this fellow that my ex -son -in -law deals with.

Why is he going to help us?

Because apparently...

This is the best weed in Brooklyn.

Man, that's like a pillow.

Yeah, but it's a pillow you can smoke.

Gentlemen, let's go get our money back.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Get a chicken.

Why would I help you?

25%. That's not chicken stretch.

I could rob a bank on my own. Make 100%. I'm sure you can, but this is easy

money. None of the risk, only the reward. You show us the ropes, get paid.

Murphy goes, ah, shit right there.

You 5 -0?

We're frankly 8 -0.

I don't know you from Adam.

How does Jesus know you're cool?

No, we're cool.

What's the matter?

What do you think of these guys, huh?

What do you think?

What do you think?

Huh? Look at me.

Can I hold him?

Can I?

He says okay.

He takes the whole bottle.

Tiny little fellow.

I find this one in a drainage ditch.

No. Yeah.

People have no heart these days.

So what makes you think you can pull it off?

Oh, I don't know.

Thought we'd give it a go.

Well, I don't know.

We'll just give it a go.

You could get life, which I guess for you isn't that long. You better think,

man, and you better know. You know, this is not... Sitting in a park bench

playing bingo.

Listen, fella.

I don't have to take shit from you.

I'll get enough of this crap out there.

In 20 days, I will not have a roof over my head. My social security check is a

joke. And my pension is tits up.

Us three are going to go through with this. We are going to go through with

If you want to make 25 % helping us, that's fine. But if you don't, keep the

bullshit to yourself.

That was a good speech, bro.

You gonna help us?

Mañana.

Uh, you got any snack?

Willy? Huh?

I love the feeling of the air on my face.

Me too.

Oh, my God, look out. We got little baby junkies here.

I think I'll get a prescription for this.

Me too.

This

food

is excellent tonight.

Too much of Tane's recipes.

Same crap. You got the munchies.

Hey, you mind?

Take them both.

How much time do you think you've got, Willie?

I don't know.

Take a guess.

Two or three years.

That's it?

You're just right.

It's a feeling.

You asked.

What about you?

Oh, I guess seven years.

What about you, Al?

I have bad luck. I'll probably live to be a hundred.

Then you can do both eulogies. Got it.

So that's 27 years total.

Our pensions average $45 ,000 a year.

$1 ,215 ,000 is what we withdraw from the bank.

Hey, hey, hey.

What if we get more?

We give it to charity.

Yeah, but what if we get less? I'm not going to go through this twice.

Hey, that's our bank right there.

Wait a second, you're going to rob your own bank?

It's personal.

Okay, we skip lesson number one.

What was lesson number one?

Never rob your own bank.

We'll move on to lesson two then. I've got 20 days before I lose my house.

Robbing a bank is an art form.

Ten different people will take the same place ten different ways.

You need to come up with a plan that is special for you.

Cameras, key, key, one entrance, one emergency exit.

The right getaway car is very important.

Find something they'll never suspect.

Just put them together like this.

Magic.

You have to be in great physical shape.

Now, I realize you guys are 4 ,000 years old. That is fabulous.

But under those masks, you're going to need to feel like you're 20.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Now, this is crucial.

You have to have a solid alibi.

Wednesday the 15th.

That's the large fundraiser.

Solid alibi.

Do we have any volunteers for the T -shirt committee?

Please put your hands down and back. We're trying to see if there are

for the T -shirt committee.

We are volunteering, Milton.

Each seller's drawer is equipped with dye packs and tracing devices.

Now, they'll give you one if they can.

but they will never endanger life to do it.

The average release response time to a robbery in progress is between two and

four minutes.

Depending on how near a unit is to the scene and how many other police calls

in the vicinity.

Everything's on the damn internet.

Stay your stopwatches to two minutes and walk it like it's the real deal.

Four minutes, 54 seconds.

Right now, you would all be in the back of a cop car.

Your guns are only there for the worst case scenario.

You need to know how to shoot, but the last thing you want to do is shoot

anybody. Who's on the door?

I'll handle it.

Stand guard, keep watch.

You know how to handle a gun?

Who?

The more you practice, the better you'll be.

And come showtime, you will stroll out of that bank with more money than you've

ever seen.

Piece of cake.

Maybe the cops will be slow.

I don't want to watch the ending.

Yeah, that didn't work out too well.

How can he sleep?

He's getting laid.

Oh, yeah.

I remember what that was like.

You feeling good?

Yeah, yeah. Good as gold.

Me too.

Nobody's going to get hurt.

That's right.

We're getting in trouble. We're out of there. That's right, yeah.

Cops come.

We lay down.

Hands in the air.

Two minutes tops.

Tops. Give or take.

You too young man.

Don't let the omelette touch the fruit.

She likes separation.

You do this every day?

Every day.

No shit?

Yes, shit.

I wish my dad did this for me.

So does your daughter.

What are you doing here?

He's making Brooke's breakfast.

I see that.

Why? I'm training him. He's making an effort to be a father.

Good morning.

Your father made you breakfast.

Holy shit.

Lady.

Sorry.

Your father will be picking you up today.

Did he find Jesus or something?

Doubtful.

He's figured out how much he's missing.

Yeah, this week.

He's just not much with the follow -through.

Give him a shot, babe.

For me.

Sure, Joe.

But only because you're my best friend.

I love you, kiddo.

You're going to do it all.

What's going on with you today?

Do you have cancer or something?

No, I'm as strong as an ox.

It's carnival day. Lots to do.

Yes, I'm coming right after school.

Yep, and I'm going to bring you fried dough with your name on it.

That's a little tight there. I love you, too.

Go make something of yourself.

I will, young man.

See you later, Dad.

I've been giving you crap for a long time now.

I guess I deserve it, mostly.

That's one of the smartest things you've ever said.

Listen, Joe, whatever it is you're doing, you don't have to do it.

There's always another way.

My business is my business, kid.

Forget that you know it. And if in the end I don't come back, it's on you.

I can't cover for you anymore.

You're her father.

You've got to step up to the plate.

Act like a man.

Even if you have to fake it.

All right.

Okay, Jack.

Let's mingle.

Hello, Paulie.

Hot enough for you?

Perfect day for it.

I've got to check in at the ticket office.

Well, be good.

I might be good, but I will be careful.

Okay, here you go.

Thank you.

You folks are popular?

Yeah. It's the cocaine.

You've got cocaine?

That was a joke, Milton.

Oh, no. Okay, okay. Very funny.

Take it for one minute. I've got to go to the karaoke thing. I can't. I've got

to take him to the cotton candy booth.

Milton, that's where you are right now.

It's okay. You're better off not knowing.

We're closed.

We're out of cocaine.

Go away.

careful in there.

Lots of money, you know.

Be very careful.

Watch your step.

I'm going in, Sam.

I

decided

we should use blanks.

No one needs to get hurt by accident.

Well, it's just us now, kids.

Fuzz, it's been a real hell of a time planning a heist with you.

Can't think of two people I'd rather have done it with.

Yeah, yeah.

Ditto.

Ladies and gentlemen.

This is an actual robbery.

Get to the ground. Don't breathe.

Don't move. Don't touch the sign of the alarm unless you like bullets flying

around your head.

Hit the dirt, big guy. Put that gun away.

Okay, folks, we'll be out of your lives in two minutes.

Get moving, blue eyes.

Here we go.

I'll tell us. Please stand up and open your windows.

Ten seconds.

No dye packs, no tracers.

All you got, missy, no tracers, no dye packs, no funny business.

Yes, Mr. Sinatra.

Nobody's going to get hurt.

Twenty seconds.

Thank you.

Here you go, ma 'am. No funny business. Do you know what that means?

All of it, son.

Thirty seconds.

Give me everything you've got.

You can have her, mister.

Forty seconds!

Hey, stick to the plan.

All units, all units, report to Williamsburg State. We have a robbery in

progress. Repeat, we have a... One minute!

I don't want to take your doll, sweetheart.

You know, when my granddaughter was your age, she had one just like it.

What's her name?

Okay, honey, this man has a job to do.

His job's robbing things.

No, sweetheart, just trying to see my family more often.

Well, I did it.

What's happening?

You okay, mister?

Gonna need a little help.

Jesus Christ.

I'll get him.

Stay put.

Oh, my God.

His mask's too hot for him.

Thank you, sweetheart.

Thank you.

I can't breathe when I wear masks, neither.

Oh, you're so sweet.

Two minutes!

What the hell's going on?

Can you make it out of here?

Yeah, I'm okay.

It's now or never, kid.

You stay in school, kiddo.

And don't rob banks, you hear me? Come on. Hurry!

This is my bank!

Are you crazy?

Freeze! Me freeze?

You don't tell me to freeze. You'll freeze.

I'm not gonna be... ...addictive anymore!

Now that the priest knew, they can hear you just fine.

What's the plan now?

I'm working on one.

Put your hands up and drop the money.

Okay. In three seconds, I'm going to shoot you. You're going to do what?

I'll shoot back.

That's your plan?

One.

Two.

Next up is three.

I can count.

He's going to bloody shoot us.

a shit shot, pal.

Now you're gonna meet your maker.

Oh, my God! Oh, my

God! Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Those were blanks, you dipshit!

Okay, folks.

Count to 90 out loud and backward, and don't stand up until you get there.

Start counting!

What's

going

on, Willie? Nothing. I just got a little overwhelmed, that's all. I'm good.

It was a hell of a time for a panic attack. I'm sorry.

No need for that. We made it. Hard part's over.

Now's the time for the grand finale.

That's it.

That's it. All right.

A story of queens, please.

He's not going to stop any time soon.

No. He'll eventually pass out.

Gentlemen, can I interest you in dessert?

What kind of pie do you have?

We have key lime, vegan pumpkin, cherry mango.

A slice of each. And more champagne.

Yeah, more champagne.

Champagne it is.

Hey, it's not the booze. What?

It's not the booze?

Hey, can you please call an ambulance?

Please?

Where does it hurt, Willie?

Everywhere.

Oh, God.

Oh, shit.

Oh, God.

Call an ambulance!

Zoom in.

Freeze frame.

There.

African -American?

Appears so. Got to be elite.

Late 60s.

Get still to the others.

I want them plastered everywhere.

You never talked about this?

Not a thing.

The whole thing's very close to the vest. He's very, very tight emotionally.

Well, Willie's in full renal failure. He needs a kidney transplant.

Well, what?

Let's just say he won't leave here without one.

They must have been very young and nimble. I fired a barrage of shots at

and they were able to evade all the bullets.

I've been on the job for a month now, and the bank has been robbed twice.

So I think I'm going to go back.

My job is a barista where I'm less likely to be shot.

All I can say is thank God for me.

It was a day of heroin for me.

I'm single.

We're famous.

Better. We're infamous.

Keep it down.

We're not out of the woods yet.

So, what's going on, Willie?

You don't come to us, you don't tell us you're sick.

We're your friends, man. We're all you got.

It's my business, guys.

Your business. Your business. Talk to him, Joe. I can't... You're a selfish

bastard.

I don't get it, Will.

I would have given you my kidney last week.

Yours is probably no good.

I still would have given it to you.

We're friends, Willie.

We're supposed to look out for each other, aren't we?

Well, let us do it.

Okay?

The suspects are armed, dangerous, possibly in their late 60s and early

They were disguised as the Rat Pack.

Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra, and Sammy Davis Jr.

Let's get out of here.

The FBI has just released this surveillance video of the robbery.

If you have any information, please call the number on our screen.

I knew it. I knew when I saw that bank surveillance.

Same height, same weight.

A lot of people fit that bill.

Yeah, but who runs like that?

We're gonna need a copy of this.

Got one right here.

Come, Bob.

I believe there's a reward.

A reward?

Yeah, I need the money. My grandma got locked up last night.

You know how it is, right, brother?

Annie. Yeah.

I have to talk to you.

I lost this tooth last week.

Did the tooth fairy come?

He brought me five dollars.

What?

You're kidding.

You know the most I ever got was a quarter?

You can't buy anything with quarters anymore, Grandpa.

Tell me about it.

Willie? Huh?

These men are with the FBI.

The FBI?

Must be bringing me a kidney.

That's my girl!

Hey,

I've got to go and find a bathroom.

All right, man.

That was awesome, Brooke!

I could rob a bank.

I'm smart.

I've got nothing to lose.

What's the worst that can end up happening? I could end up spending the

years of my life in some country club -style prison, rent -free.

You got the school for that?

Well, Mr. Gardner, we seem to be missing one hour of your existence.

Between 2 .30 p .m. and 3 .30 p .m., the same hour that three elderly gentlemen

robbed $2 .3 million from the Williamsburg Savings Bank.

Wow, that's some hefty payday.

You were working the haunted house ride between 2 and 4?

Sort of, yeah.

And you never left that ride?

Only to go inside, scare the kids.

I got up, like I always do, 6 a .m.

I woke my granddaughter to school, like I do every day.

Well, it's a fairly new relationship, so we spent a lot of time together.

The first thing in the morning, we made love twice.

No, three times.

And that was it.

Annie Santori.

And then we got up, I made pancakes, and then I got dressed.

Got dressed.

Had breakfast at Matt's. I go there a couple of times a week at least.

For years, he's a regular.

You seeing anybody?

I'm married with two kids.

Take my number.

Things happen.

I got dressed.

I gathered the tickets for the ride booth.

I'm on that committee for the fundraiser.

All right, boys.

Good luck to us all.

Time to get in the bag.

Got to the park around two, talked to my friend Paul for a few minutes, then ran

one of the ticket booths.

Hi, Tony.

Good afternoon.

I've got you a souvenir.

Oh, thanks, Joe. I needed a hat.

And that's where I was for most of the carnival. You can ask anyone who bought

ticket. They'll tell you they got it from a handsome old gent in a grey flat

cap.

Then we went to the fair, and I was at the cotton candy stand until 2, and then

Mr. Milton Kupchak relieved me.

Al was there all day.

At 2 .30 p .m.? Who?

Al. Gardner?

Yes. He's here?

You know, in the cotton candy booth, he tried to sell me cocaine.

And I'm prepared to testify.

Kids love the haunted house.

Frankenstein's one of the favorites.

Must have been in there over an hour.

Yes, I've had stomach issues for years from all the drinking I used to do.

It's called diverticulitis, and the doctor says I should probably have a

of my colon removed, but I don't really like that idea.

So from 2 .30 to 3 .30, give or take, you were going

to the bathroom.

Yes. It's very tedious, but I keep reading material with me all the time.

pass the time.

After that, I found my lady friend and we rehearsed our karaoke performance.

Let me tell you about a girl I know.

She's my baby and she lives like a doll.

Every morning before the sun comes up, she brings me coffee and my favorite

That's why I know. Yes, I know.

Hallelujah, I love you so.

Now if I call her on the telephone.

Then what happens?

And tell her that I'm all alone.

Oh my goodness.

By the time I count to four.

Oh, well.

I hear her knocking at my door.

In the evening when the sun goes down. When there's nobody else. Would you mind

washing this dirty laundry for me?

You got it.

Tell me, baby, everything's all right. That's why I know.

Yes, I know.

Hallelujah, I just love you so.

Hallelujah, I just love you so.

Hallelujah, I just love you so. Yes, I do.

All together it was a lovely day at the carnival.

Hit me with your best shot!

almost perfect.

He said, let me tell you a little something about criminals.

They always make one stupid mistake that ends up screwing up the whole plan.

I'm gonna need you to take a ride with me, Harding.

Okay, guys, let's go.

Clear the gym. Official business.

Out the back door there. All right. Hurry up. Hurry up. Let's go.

Go. Go.

Right over here.

Run him up.

I want you to start with that man over there, okay?

Get a good look at his face.

He's not here.

Are you sure?

Yep, I'm positive. I got a great memory.

Hey, you want to have another look?

Not really.

Can I go home now?

This is a mean old world to live in

all by yourself.

This is a mean old world to live in.

I thought you might not be coming.

Oh, here I am.

So what's good here, Joey?

Nothing, really.

Why do you come?

I like bad coffee.

Yes, yes, I understand.

He has all his shots.

Babies, distemper, boretella. He's been neutered. All the papers on the proper

order. You take your cut?

No. Not from you.

It is a culture's duty to take care of its elderly.

It is a culture's duty to take care of its elderly.

Where's the tattoo?

Hannah, mi amigo, show the person with the worst eyes an image she can't

The policia will be spinning around for years.

That looks like a gang tattoo to me. If we could find this artist, then we could

find our perp.

Very impressive.

That's a tragedy.

FBI.

Behind you. Six o 'clock.

Agent Hamer.

Would you like a bad coffee?

I'm a soy latte man, Mr. Harding. I'm lactose intolerant.

He left that behind at evidence.

How did you find me?

Well, that's what I do.

I find people.

Oh, this is my friend Jesus.

He fusses dogs.

Special Agent Hamer, FBI.

Jesus Garcia.

Queens.

Are you, uh, adopting a puppy, Mr. Harding?

Yes, yeah, it's my granddaughter.

She made the honor roll at school.

That's great.

I love puppies.

Do you mind?

Uh, he might be sleeping.

Oh, that's okay.

I won't wake him.

Oh, good heavens, aren't you just the cutest little thing?

Let me get a look at you with this moist fade.

When I was just a kid, I grew up with border collies. Oh, now that's a great

breed. I just love border collies. Yeah, they're wonderful.

He's a cute little fella.

Hey, boy, come here. Come here, little fella.

Yeah, come on.

You little son of a bitch.

Oh, be careful there. He's teething.

I have to watch his little razor blades.

Thanks. We don't want you to bleed to death.

I've got to get this little guy back to the house before my granddaughter gets

out of school.

Nice surprise for her.

He'll knock her socks off.

Do you have a dog now, Agent Hamer?

No. It's my job.

Long hours.

Couldn't do that to an animal.

All right.

Let's get this little fella to his new home.

Ah, you boys are killing me with these corns.

Someone just dropped off this present.

Take these.

Cut them up.

Everyone deserves a piece of the pie.

Ow!

Sorry, Mr. Gardner.

Thought you'd be tougher than that.

I'm not tough. I'm a very sensitive person.

I'm going to be honest with you.

I don't really want to die today.

That's a new one.

But if I do, I just want to say that you've been a terrific roommate and

for... 25 years.

25 years?

It's been that long? Seems like 25 days, doesn't it? Yeah, it does.

Underwater.

Good one.

All right, gentlemen, here we go.

They say in life, if you're lucky, you get a couple of great

friends.

The people who are right with you to the end.

You grow old together, see it all together, do it all together, laugh and

together.

Al Gardner was one of those guys for me.

There will not be many men like him.

Willing to risk all for others.

Give you a kind word.

Or a kidney.

And complain about it every step of the way.

That's not altogether true.

Annie? Yes?

It's your problem now.

Thanks. Good luck. May you enjoy every minute of every moment you have.

We love you.

We love you too, young man.

Cheers. Cheers, everyone.

Let's give it up for the wedding party!

The difference a day made

24 little

hours Bought

the sun and the flowers

I'm going to revise my estimate, Joey.

How's that?

I may be around another 20 years.

Not without the kidney.

That's 10 years, tops.

Close enough. I'll take it.

Here he comes.

What's the matter?

My face is killing me. I've never had a smile so much in my life.

So?

What's it like?

What's what like?

Being married, dummy.

I... I don't know how any of this happened. I don't even remember

I mean, I feel like a raccoon caught in a bear trap with one leg stuck.

She's a terrific person. I mean, she's sexy.

We get it on.

She's a great cook.

She likes me the way I am.

I don't even like me the way I am.

Everything is terrific, but I got to tell you, I'm experiencing this very odd

feeling. I think it might be happiness.

Cheers. Your glass is officially full.