All language subtitles for my_favorite_martian_s03e31_my_nut_cup_runneth_over

Hey, is there something wrong with
your... It's a molecular reassembler,

yes, there's something wrong with it. It
doesn't work.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to ask an embarrassing
question.

Oh, I'm sorry too, Tim. I didn't mean to
be short with you.

It's just that this bleep machine is
being obstinate.

What was that?

What was what?

I thought I heard a bleep.

That's a Martian word, meaning if I had
to do it over again, I never would have

started in the first place.

That's a pretty handy word to have in
your vocabulary.

At moments like these, even bleep is
inadequate.

It's working again. It was supposed to
turn into a lampshade.

What was that supposed to be?

Well, I was trying to restore it to its
original form as a glass tumbler.

I think you'd better go back to the
aspirin. I have a feeling you're going

have a headache.

That's the trouble.

I never know what's going to happen when
I turn it on.

Well, if I don't get to the office
pretty soon, I know what'll happen to

I'll turn into an unemployed reporter.

But it's amazing that a simple little
gadget like this can make such changes.

Uncle Martin, there was a squirrel.

Tim, I wish you wouldn't do that.

I dropped my pecan.

Please?

Where's my fur?

Well, now, just take it easy. You see,
we... Wait a minute.

This isn't how squirrels look under
their fur.

And my tail is gone.

What's going on?

Well, there was a slight accident. You
see this machine?

Little accident, huh?

Well, boy, I'll say one thing. All the
nuts aren't in the trees.

Well, don't you stand there.

Do something.

The money's freezing.

Well, I'll just reassemble the molecules
of that blanket.

There.

My wife isn't going to like this.

Oh, great.

That's all we needed was a henpecked
squirrel.

And you're being presumptuous. Remember
it was our doing that brought him into

our house as a guest in the first place.

A guest?

Please accept our apologies if we have
inconvenienced you at all.

Inconvenienced me?

That's just like you human beings. Step
all over somebody and then say you're

sorry you've inconvenienced them.

It so happens I have a family.

What are they going to say when I show
up tonight looking like this?

Would you excuse us for a minute? Not
unless you change me back, I won't. Just

for a minute, please.

Uncle Martin, he can't stay here.

Well, what do you suggest? That we build
him a tree house?

I suggest that you fix that molecular...
Molecular reassembly. Yes, yes. Change

him back into a squirrel.

An excellent suggestion.

Obvious, but excellent.

There's only one problem.

I haven't found out yet the source of
the machine's malfunction.

Well, look, can't you do it with your
finger? I mean, I've seen you point at

things and change them just by...
Molecular reconstruction by digital

is only temporary.

It wouldn't last more than a few hours.

Oh, that's great.

Well, what if somebody walks in here and
sees him the way he looks right now?

They'll think he's a fugitive from a
blanket factory.

But at the moment, I'm less concerned
about that than the time factor.

What time factor? Well, if I don't have
the molecular reassembler repaired in

eight hours, his atomic structure will
be permanently set.

You mean... he'll be like that?

Permanently? Yes.

That's precisely what I mean. Oh, that's
swell. That's just swell. Well, how

long do you think that he...

That's it.

That's right. Brute force.

That's the way you human beings get
everything. Brute force.

All the time pushing us little guys
around just because you're bigger and

stronger. You ought to be ashamed of
yourself. That's what you ought to be

ashamed. You ought to be ashamed of
yourself.

That's the truth.

I'm truly sorry. I had to do that, but
it was a matter of necessity.

Whose necessity?

Yours or mine?

Admittedly, my own. There, you see,
yours.

When you change me into this.

I dropped a great, big, beautiful pecan.

That pecan was just as important to me
as it is to you that people don't find

out you're a Martian.

You mean you know? Of course I know.

I know a few things about you, too, like
last Wednesday night when that girl was

up here.

You told her. Never mind.

I know what I told her. Yes, and you
ought to be ashamed of yourself. That's

what you ought to be.

Ashamed. Well, if there's anything I
can't stand, it's a blabbermouth

Unfortunately, Tim, he is in the right
and we are wrong.

We have disturbed the even tenor of his
life.

Oh, well, he's thrown a few clinkers
into ours. You know that, don't you?

we have no choice but to employ friendly
persuasion. We can't force him to

cooperate.

Honey. I can explain everything.

It's my wife.

I told you she wasn't going to like
this.

Honey, don't worry. Good morning, madam.

Madam, I assure you there was no thought
of deceiving you.

This unfortunate situation was entirely
unpremeditated. And I have every

intention of correcting it as quickly as
possible.

Yes, yes, your husband's already
apprised us of his family

And I can only say that I shall see to
it personally that none of you suffer

during his absence.

Well, of course, if you feel that's
necessary.

Don't worry, dear.

I'll be right here.

What was all that about?

Well, she feels that it would only be
fair for us to support the family while

her husband is in his present condition.

They're moving in with us.

The whole family?

Yes.

Oh, that's great.

That's just what this community needs.

A family boarding house. Rooms with
nuts.

Yoo -hoo, Tim!

Did you hear the wonderful news?

Well, uh, no, Mrs. Brown. I just got
home from work. Well, Captain Wharton

suddenly taken very ill.

That's wonderful news?

Oh, well, not for Captain Wharton, of
course. But it's a perfectly marvelous

break for Bill Brennan. Well, I've
always said that Brennan deserves every

he can get. Oh,

that's beautiful. Just beautiful, Bill.

Oh, Laura, you're too kind.

I was just thinking the same thing.

What were you rehearsing for,
Lieutenant?

Pain?

No, Tim, that's what I was trying to
tell you.

Captain Wharton got sick, and so they
put Bill in charge of the police follies

tonight. You remember you bought tickets
from Bill. Oh, yes, I remember. My arm

still hurts from the twisting.

Oh, he did no such thing. You're just
saying that.

It's for a very worthy charity, and
there'll be some marvelous entertainment

talent there.

Especially now that I'm in charge.

I've added three more solos for myself,
next to closing, of course.

Wouldn't right after closing be better?

Well, someday you will go too far, and I
hope it's soon.

Bill, I'm just teasing.

Now stop it, Tim.

I've baked some fudge brownies, and I
want you and Martin to come down and

us celebrate.

Oh, well, look at me. It wasn't my idea.

Well,

I don't know if we can, Mrs. Brown. You
see, he's not feeling very well, and I

don't think he'll be able to come down.
Well, then we'll come up there just as

soon as I take the brownies out of the
oven.

Oh, well, I wouldn't do that if I were
you.

Well, of course you would, Tim.

Otherwise, your brownies would be burned
to a crisp.

What's the matter, O 'Hara? All of a
sudden you don't look too well.

Well, I have a funny feeling that Uncle
Martin and I are going to be sick soon.

Oh, nothing trivial, I hope.

Uncle Martin!

We're in trouble.

What are you doing up

there?

The way you charged in here, you
frightened me.

You frightened everybody.

Everybody?

What do you mean, everybody?

It's all right, folks.

He's harmless.

Where did all these squirrels come from?
What's wrong?

They're my family.

Your uncle agreed to take care of us.

That's true.

But at the time, I didn't realize that
you were contributing so heavily to the

population explosion.

You've got to get rid of him, quick.

Mrs. Brown and Brennan are on their way
up here. Up here? What for?

Well, Brennan has been putting charge of
the police follies, and they're coming

up here to celebrate.

Coming up here to celebrate? Yeah. That
doesn't make sense. Mrs. Brown thought

of it. In that case, it doesn't have to
make sense.

Your attention, everybody, please. Your
attention.

Quiet, please. Quiet, fellas. Wait.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

We have a small crisis in the making.

However, with your cooperation, I'm sure
that it's nothing that we can't handle.

Oh, Loralee, I fail to understand why
you insist on celebrating my good

with the O 'Haras. The only thing I have
in common with them is a mutual

distrust. That's a beginning, Bill. You
should try to build on that foundation.

Loralee, wait.

What is it?

I just saw a squirrel jump out of that
tree into the O 'Hara's apartment.

A squirrel?

Now, why in the world would a squirrel
go in Tim's apartment?

Well, obviously in search of squirrel
food.

And I must say, he went to the right
place.

Oh, Bill. Come on, we'll be late.

Now, since you're too big to hide behind
anything, we'll merely introduce you as

a friend who was here on a short visit.

Where have you been?

I was worried about you.

Here they come.

Never mind that now. We're about to
receive some unwelcome visitors.

Quick, madam, quick. Behind the
fireplace.

I think there's room for one more.

Yoo -hoo, Martin. Tim, here we are.

Hello, everybody. Oh, hello, Mrs. Brown.
Hi, Lieutenant Brown. How are you? How

are you? Hi, it's good to see you. Hi.
What are you so jumpy about, O 'Hara?

He's excited about your good fortune.

As for myself, I'm relieved.

Relieved? Yes. A while ago, I thought
someone had taken ill when I heard the

caterwauling. I'm relieved it was only
Brennan exercising his vocal cords. I

believe the 18th century poet William
Shenstone could have had you in mind

he said, Jealousy is the fear or
apprehension of superiority.

Envy our uneasiness under it.

Yes, yes. And a century before that, an
even greater English poet, William

Shakespeare, observed that the empty
vessel makes the greatest sound.

Now, boys, just stop this bickering.

We're all friends here, and if we're
not, we should be.

Oh, hello.

Oh, well, uh, Loralee, may I present,
uh, may I present our friend, Mr., uh,

Mr., uh, Mr., Mr.

Squirrelton. Uh, Red Squirrelton.

Uh, Red, this is our very dear landlady,
Mrs. Brown.

I've seen you before, Mrs. Brown.

And I think you're very nice for a human
being.

Oh, well, now aren't you the flatterer.

Just like that, you get the very first
fudge brownie. Oh, they're delicious.

The only reason I can say that is
because I made them myself, and I

should know.

Here you are.

What in the world?

What's he doing?

Well, he's a very finicky eater, Mrs.
Brown.

Oh, well, I thought maybe he didn't like
my brownie. Oh, no, ma 'am.

They're delicious.

The best part is the shells are nice and
soft so you don't have to break your

teeth getting to the nut meat.

He has a warm and sensitive humor,
doesn't he?

Red, I'd like to introduce you to
Lieutenant Brennan.

He's a policeman.

If you're looking for a secret panel,
you're wasting your time.

As we were coming up here, I saw a
squirrel jump in your window, O 'Hara.

Well, he was probably trying to escape
from your singing.

Good chance, Loralee, this place of
theirs is infested with squirrels.

At one time, I had squirrels in my
attic.

You sure it wasn't bats in your belfry?

Very amusing, O 'Hara.

Juvenile, but amusing.

They did a lot of damage, Loralee,
before I could get rid of them.

To protect your investment here, I
suggest you have this place inspected.

dear. Do you really think I should?

Most emphatically, those little beggars
are very destructive.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself
talking about squirrels like that.

It's people like you that go around
cutting down trees so they don't have

place to sleep and put their food so
they have to move into your old attics.

think they like living in attics?

It's cold and drastic and half the time
the roof leaks when it rains and all you

can think of is exterminating them. You
want to be ashamed of yourself, that's

what you want to be ashamed.

I have a good mind to report you to the
SPCA.

I think I heard something. Brendan, the
only squirrel in this place is you. And

if you don't believe me, why don't you
search the place? Why don't you start

with that closet?

No, no, no.

All right, I will.

My nut cup runneth over.

They've been storing their nuts in there
today.

I knew there was something funny going
on around here the minute I saw that

squirrel jump through that window.

Loralee, this is the worst infestation
I've ever seen.

You get on that telephone and call up
the exterminator this very minute. The

exterminator?

been left without saying goodbye.

Is he coming back?

I hope so, Laura Lee.

For all our sakes. Not to mention his
family. I certainly hope so.

Jim, put that on that left antenna while
I do the right one.

Gone. Gone without a trace. Not just
red, but the entire family. Lock, stock,

barrel, and nuts.

Hard to blame them, Tim.

Once they got the idea that an
exterminator was on his way here, Tim,

serious. Well, yeah, but wait till Red
finds out the molecular reassembler is

working.

The question is, will he find out in
time?

Hey, there he is. Quick, tell him.

You'll frighten him.

Red? Red, listen to me.

This is Martin O 'Hara. We're ready for
you now.

Oh, no, you don't.

You're not going to exterminate me.

I got a family to think about.

You go find somebody else to experiment
on.

He's running away.

Brad, wait!

It's no use, Tim.

He doesn't trust us human beings.

And I don't blame him.

You and I are going to have to join
forces.

I can keep track of him with my built
-in TV scope.

But you're going to have to catch up
with him and talk him into coming back

here. And there isn't much time.

Well, I've never chased a squirrel up a
tree before, but I'm willing to give it

a try.

Hurry, Tim. Time is running out.

I just couldn't keep up with him.

I swear I've been up every nut tree in
this town.

Look, it's bad enough changing a
squirrel into a man.

Well, pretty soon you're going to have
to change a man into a squirrel.

I just can't catch him.

If you'll pardon the expression, I'm up
a tree.

Yeah, listen, he's a man now with a man
-sized appetite.

Huh? If you were a man in his shoes,
where would you go to get nuts?

To a nut shop.

Well? Ye olde nut shop.

Right. His keen sense of smell has
picked up the aroma of roasting nuts

Olde Nut Shop. That's right in the
neighborhood.

He's being drawn irresistibly to it.

Now, if you hurry, you can get there
before he does.

And hurry, Tim. We have only about half
an hour left. Gotcha.

Hi.

Can I help you? Uh -uh.

Oh, I do believe that this lady was in
front of me.

No, you were ahead of me. Oh, well, it
doesn't matter. I was just looking.

Just looking?

For a friend.

Not fancy.

Excuse me.

Uncle Martin, do you read me? Loud and
clear.

Not so loud.

Tim, can you hear me?

Yes, and shh.

He's coming. Don't let him get away.

I'll be right there.

Ren. Ren,

it's me, Tim.

What did you do that for?

You scared the wits out of me. You
people always go around scaring us like

just for the fun of it, don't you? You
just enjoy seeing us jump and run

you're bullies. Admit it. You enjoy it,
don't you?

He's a little nervous.

I'm sorry, Red.

I didn't mean to startle you.

Now, come on down here.

No. Yes.

No! Red, Uncle Martin has the you -know
-what fixed.

Yeah? Honest. So if you'll just go back
to the apartment with me. Oh, no, you

don't. You've got an exterminator up
there. I give my word. Yeah, I see your

scheme. You just want to cover up your
mistakes by exterminating me. Well, I'm

not going with you. You humor them.

I'll call the police.

I'm sorry about this. I guess you think
we're a couple of nuts.

I like nuts.

That's why I'm here.

I just love them. You do?

So do I.

This place is just beautiful.

I wish my wife could see it. Yes,
please.

Oh, can I help, sir?

Oh, no, thank you. I can manage. Now,
just a moment, sir.

Well, no, no. It's all right. I'll pay
for them. Well, how are you going to pay

for them when I don't know how many he's
got? I have to weigh them. You hear the

lady, Red?

Now, you give her back the nuts so that
she can weigh them so that I can pay for

them. What do you mean pay for them?

Nuts grow on trees.

They belong to everybody.

Sir, these nuts do not belong to
everybody. These nuts belong to ye olde

shop until such time as you pay for
them. That's the trouble with people.

They think everything belongs to them
just because they say so.

You don't want the rest of us to have a
single solitary thing unless it's

something you don't want yourself.

Uncle Martin, help.

Hell.

Mr. O 'Hara?

Yes, yes, I'm Martin O 'Hara.

Do you know these two characters?

Why, of course. This is my nephew, Tim,
and a friend of his. Well, this one

claims he's a squirrel.

Well, officer, I tried to explain about
that.

Mm -hmm.

And your explanation didn't make any
more sense than his explanation.

This one that says he's a squirrel keeps
jumping from counter to counter, like

he's trying to prove it.

Perhaps I was carrying it a bit too far,
Red.

The fact of the matter is, officer, that
our friend here is a squirrel.

Is that a fact?

Our friend is a squirrel, Tim here is a
squirrel, and I'm a squirrel.

Oh, you heard of the beetles, the
animals, the chipmunks? Well, I'd like

introduce you to the squirrel.

We're a new vocal group, and we're
trying to get a little publicity for

tonight's performance.

I have a feeling the only place you're
going to sing tonight is in a police

station. Oh, but officer, officer, you
can't do that. Lieutenant Brennan is

counting on us to perform at the police
follows, and we're due there now.

Bill Brennan?

Of course.

Is that a fact?

Yes. Now, goodbye, officer, if you'll
excuse us. Wait a minute.

I'll drive you down there. Red lights,
sirens, the works. Oh, that won't be

necessary. Ah, but I insist.

How much time we got? About five minutes
and thirty -one seconds. All right, you

fellas, hold it right here a minute.

Lieutenant Brennan, the squirrels are
here.

Squirrels? Uh, the vocal group, the
squirrels, for the program tonight.

I don't have any group called the
squirrels.

Better than my old friends, the O
'Harens. What's going on? I'll find out

soon as I get these three nuts down to
the stage. Quick, camera at this rate!

Follow me!

Follow me.

How about out front?

There are about 4 ,000 policemen out
there. With 300 cops backstage, we

got any choice.

This is the only safe place.

Where? On stage.

Why? The squirrels are about to make
their debut. I can't say anything.

All you have to do is move your lips and
I'll take care of the rest. No, no, no.

I'm going to run all night.

I'm going to run all day.

I'll bet my money on a bobtail mag.
Somebody bet on it. Somebody bet on it.

Somebody bet on the bag.

I'm going to run for a smash.

Yes, I'm counted on that.

Oh, will you listen to that applause?

We're the biggest thing since long
haircuts.

You didn't. Of course I did. That was
the purpose of the entire operation.

Red. Oh, come on, Red. Would you just
listen for a second? We're a smash.

You could have a fortune. You could have
a house in Calm Springs.

Really. A whole swimming pool full of
nuts.

All right,

O 'Hara. What were you doing running all
over the place? You're under arrest

until I find out what you were up to.

Bill, how can you say that?

Why, they're... How do you say it in
show business?

A smash.

I'll smash them, all right.

Brennan, we were just trying to
publicize the show for you.

Help you get the money for the
policeman's fund.

A likely story.

Brennan? Yes, Captain. Brilliant show.
Introduce me. Better still, make sure

you're raised to have these marvelous
squirrels at our departmental party next

month. Yes, Captain.

Oh, Harrah. Oh, buddy.

Where's Red?

Red?

He's gone.

Gone? We broke up the act.

Oh, but you can't do that. I promised
the captain.

Well, that's showbiz.