Original subtitles

Last week on Maud. What about the job?

Walter, I'm sorry. I thought you knew. I don't have any jobs open at my place.

What are you talking about? Well, frankly, I was looking for a much

Younger man?

Oh, the poor guy.

Now, look, don't you say that in front of Walter. If there's one thing he

doesn't want, it's sympathy.

Now, he's home, and he's happy, and let's just let him sleep it off.

Marty, I'm not sure that he's drunk. Oh, come on. I didn't smell any liquor on

his breath, and I didn't like the way his eyes looked.

Carol, tell Vivian to hurry upstairs for that coffee.

Walter,

how could you do this to me? Come on, boy.

Come on, we're going to wake him. Oh, Walter, please don't wake me. Come on.

going to wake him.

Come on, Walter.

Lady Godiva was a freedom rider.

She didn't care if the whole world...

Jonah barked with the Lord to guide her. She was a sister who really could.

Isadora was the first proper to angel that she showed up. Oh, yeah.

The country was falling apart.

Betsy Ross got it all sewed up.

And then there's more.

All right, I'll hold, but please hurry.

Excuse me, I'm Mrs. Walter Findley.

My husband came here last night. He's a patient of Dr. Harmon's.

I was told if I came back this morning at 8 o 'clock, I could see him. It's 8 o

'clock right now.

Nurse, this is important.

So is this.

Nurse, you don't understand.

My husband took an overdose of sleeping pills. He almost died. I haven't even

seen him yet. I'm terribly worried.

I'm very worried about my husband, too. He's terribly sick.

I'm trying to get him some decent care.

Well, can't you get him in here?

He is in here.

I'm trying to get him a private room.

Yes?

Well, let me know as soon as you can, huh?

Now, what's the name? Walter Findlay.

29A. He's conscious now.

Thank you. Oh, tell me, what's wrong with your husband?

He checked in yesterday with a case of the shingles.

Now he's in intensive care.

Intensive? I had no idea shingles could be that serious.

They're not.

A nurse gave him the wrong medication.

That is terrible.

I know, but I can't blame her.

I've made the same mistake myself.

Walter?

Walter, darling.

Are you feeling better?

Arthur should be here any minute.

He says you're fine.

And you look fine.

Now, there's nothing like a good night's sleep.

I mean... I mean, you needed the rest.

Arthur says you're fine.

Oh, I said that, didn't I?

Well, anyway, darling, it's certainly...

Good news for all of us.

They think I'm crazy here.

Walter, nobody thinks any such thing.

Yes, they do. They think I'm crazy. Walter.

Yesterday I said to myself, here I am worrying about being bankrupt.

Worrying because I can't find a job.

Worrying because there's no hope for the future.

Why the hell am I killing myself?

That's when I decided to kill myself.

Oh, darling, I understand.

Yeah, you do, but they don't. They think I'm crazy.

Honey, do you remember that joke about the motorist who was changing a tire

outside the mental hospital?

No. Well, this motorist was changing a tire outside a mental hospital, and he

took off three of the bolts, and they rolled right down into a sewer drain.

the man stood there, and he thought, oh, good Lord, what am I going to do now,

when suddenly an inmate...

from the other side of the fence, said, hey, mister, why don't you take one bolt

from each of the other three wheels?

Well, the guy was amazed, you know. He said, excuse me, but what are you doing

in a mental hospital?

So the inmate said, well, I'm here because I'm crazy, not stupid.

What's that got to do with me? You're here because you're stupid, not me.

Darling, look what I've brought you. Your favorite candies, chocolate

cherries. Good.

Feed me one.

Here, darling, open the box, Walter.

No, Mort, feed me one.

Walter, you're acting like a little boy.

That's because I'm crazy.

Walter, you stop that. I really don't want to hear that again.

Would you pull down the blanket for me? Of course, darling. It's so warm in

here, all you really need is...

Now, these

cherries aren't the ones... You know, that you normally get, but I think

you'll like them. They're fanny fun.

I didn't have time to go to Kmart.

More. Yes, dear.

I know it's none of my business, but... Am I strapped to the bed?

Well... Yes.

How about another cherry?

Boy, this is a rubber room, isn't it? Honey, you know what you need? You need

some light in here. Today is one of the most beautiful days we've had, I think,

a lot.

No fool's nest, isn't it, Mort? The nothing ward. Oh, now, where did you get

Crazy, I can deal like that.

Well, look at me. Anybody wearing this much leather should be on a motorcycle.

Darling, look, Arthur explained to me that so many sleeping pills can have

terrible after effects.

Darling, he probably just wanted to be sure that you wouldn't go into

convulsions. Darling, these restraints are simply a safety precaution.

Is that all? Well, of course that's all.

Darling, you're in a hospital.

The only thing that anybody cares about here is your well -being.

I mean, all the doctors and nurses ever think about is the best possible care

for the patient.

Time for your medication.

Over my dead body.

Wait a minute. Is this Finley? Yes.

Oh, well, I guess these aren't for him.

But what are they? Sleeping pills.

This is just what we were talking about.

Funny, isn't it?

It's a riot.

Joke's on me.

Ward, get me out of here. I want out.

Ward, get me out of here. Please, please, darling, calm down. Ward! Good

morning, Walter.

Well, you gave us quite a scare last night.

Arthur, would you get these straps off me?

Oh, of course, old buddy.

You don't need those anymore. Yes, thank you.

Uh, Maude, would you hold that for me, please?

As a matter of fact, uh, why don't you read it?

Are those my release papers? No, no, no. Your release papers are out at the

desk. Those are just some forms from a friend of mine, a Dr. Bob Slager.

Dr. Slager, huh?

Yep. What kind of doctor is he?

From this, I'd say he's a very good doctor.

He is.

One of the best in this field.

But what's his field?

Well, he's an expert on this stuff.

Arthur, when you go to his office, what does it say on his door?

Well, it's the same thing it says on my door.

A medical corporation.

Arthur! All right, all right, all right, Walter.

He's a psychiatrist.

And you want me to go see him? Well, not exactly.

I talked your case over with Dr. Schlager, and, uh... Well... He feels it

be best for you to go downtown for a few days of observation.

That's what the papers are for. Where downtown, Arthur? The Jordan Mental

Center.

Mental health center?

Come on, Arthur.

I may be stupid, but I'm not crazy.

Walter,

this is just routine.

Look, if you came home now, you'd be facing the same problems that got you in

here.

You're just not ready to deal with them on your own yet.

Mort, will you tell him?

You don't want me in some booby hat. You want me home with you, right?

Mort?

Darling, it's only for 72 hours. Yes.

Oh, that's great.

My wife and my best friend think I'm nuts.

Well, I'm not going.

No, no, I'm not. Now, Walter. No, I'm not.

Walter,

you'll like the Jordan Center.

It's just like this hospital. Lovely facilities. Very competent staff.

Mr. Finley, do I give you your enema now?

He's here because he's stupid, not constipated.

What are you afraid of, Ward? I may make another attempt.

Don't worry. Remember, I'm Walter Findlay. I failed at business.

I failed at getting myself a job. I couldn't even kill myself right. Will

stop it, Walter?

Stop it.

Please.

Please. Please.

Please. Stop.

Don't. Please.

Come on.

Okay.

Okay, okay.

I'm convinced. I'll go in.

Do I sign the commitment papers with a pen or a finger paint?

Come on, Walter. It's not a commitment. You're simply volunteering for

treatment. Oh, great.

Wasn't it could be the best thing that ever happened to me? I could learn a

trade.

Leathercraft.

I could make my own straps with my initials on them. CW.

Crazy Walter.

All in all, I'd say he's taking it pretty well.

Yep, watch out, love. Hot stuff behind you.

Since when has fruit punch been hot stuff?

Who said anything about punch?

Oh, Mrs.

Naugatuck, this looks wonderful. I really didn't expect you to prepare such

feast. Well, it's a special occasion.

Mr. Finlay's been gone a whole week, and I want to show him how we've missed

him. Besides, I don't expect they fed him too well at that loony bin.

Mrs. Naugatuck, the Jordan Mental Health Center is not a loony bin.

And when Walter walks through that door, I do not want any references made to

screwy or loony or crazy. Do you understand?

Yes. And get those nuts off the table.

I'm sorry I snapped.

Oh, it's just that I'm so nervous. I haven't seen Walter in a week.

Well, didn't you go to visit him? No, Dr. Slager asked me not to. They

discourage visitors.

Oh, that's a good idea, poor Mr.

Finley. He wouldn't like strangers staring at him just because his phone's

the hook.

That is exactly the kind of remark I do not want to hear. I don't want any talk

like this in front of Walter. And get rid of the fruitcake, too. Yes.

Oh, Carol, you're home early from work. That's wonderful, dear. And I stopped by

the drugstore and picked up the electric razor you wanted for Walter. Thank you,

darling. Thank you.

Carol, are you sure this is safe?

Of course it's safe. What can he do with an electric razor?

Couldn't you get one with a shorter cord?

Mother, you're being silly.

I can understand you hiding the knives and the pills, but this is going too

You're probably right. It's just that I've never been through anything like

before. I don't know what I'm going to say to Walter.

What if he's changed?

It'll be all right, ma 'am. Of course it will.

How much will he change in a week?

And that's another thing. Why did they keep him a whole week? He was only

supposed to be there for three days.

Oh, Carol, I've just missed him. I've missed him so.

Oh, poor sweet Mr.

Finlay. You never know how much you'll miss a man until he snaps his twigs.

Mrs. Naugatuck, please, I do not want to hear remarks like that. How many times

do I have to tell you? And do we really need those bananas?

Maude, good news, good news.

Hi, Carol. Hi, Viv. Arthur called just a few minutes ago, and he said Walter is

just fine. And it should be only a few minutes before they're here from the...

you know where.

Vivian, there's no need to be coy. I mean, it's no secret.

Oh, well, from the insane asylum.

Vivian, it is not an insane asylum.

It is a mental health center. Is everybody in this house determined to

up the wall?

Mother, look.

There are too many of us here. We're just making you nervous.

Now, why don't we all leave so you can be alone with Walter? No, no, no. I want

you to stay.

I really don't want to be alone with Walter.

It's going to be so awkward at first.

I understand, Maude. And when Walter gets here, we won't leave your side.

Here's the cake.

Oh, that looks scrumptious.

Oh, Walter's really going to love it. I know.

Hey, everybody, guess who's here?

Oh,

Carol.

Walter, I missed you so much.

Oh, you look wonderful.

How do you feel? Oh, I feel great. It's so good to see everybody. Carol.

Vivian. Walter.

Walter. You're the picture of mental health.

Thank you, Vivian.

Mrs. Nogat's... Bert! Mr. Finley, good to see you. Oh, Grandpa.

Come here and look at all this great food Mrs. Nogat has made. Oh, food I

made.

Arthur, he looks wonderful.

But why did he have to stay there a whole week?

Well, I'm afraid we have a problem.

What problem? Come here.

Look at this beautiful cake. I know, darling. It's your favorite, German

chocolate. Now, let's all have a piece.

Now, you're the party boy, Walter, so you cut the cake.

Well, to tell the truth, I'm really not that hungry, but everybody else, go

ahead. Mrs.

Naugatuck, would you spoon up some cake for everybody?

Maude, can I see you alone for a minute in the kitchen?

Alone?

Yes, I want to be alone with my wife.

Go on, Maude.

I'll be alone in the kitchen with Walter.

I have something very important to tell you, and I hope you understand.

Mrs. Lonegrove forgot the coffee cup.

You see, while I was away, I had a lot of...

Wait a minute.

Now, wait a minute!

Wait a minute!

I'm not a jolly good fellow.

You know, last week I took an overdose of sleeping pills, and for the last

days I've been in a mental hospital.

And this is not a welcome home party.

I'm going back to the hospital at nine o 'clock tonight.

More...

That's what I was trying to explain to you. I'm sorry.

I just don't think I'm ready to come home yet.

I'm going upstairs to pack a few things to take back with me.

Mother. Folks, could I talk to Marty alone, please? Sure.

Oh, sure.

Come on, everybody.

Why did he have to go back?

He doesn't, and that's the problem. What do you mean? What is the problem?

There's nothing really wrong with Walter.

He just is running away from responsibility.

And the Jordan Center is the perfect place to do it.

No pressures, no demands. What?

Tell me, what do I have to do to stop him?

Marty, somehow we have to find a way to make him believe he has some small value

in this world, that his life means something.

Well, tell me, Arthur, what do I have to do to show him?

I'm sorry, Marty.

I wish I knew.

I talked to Dr. Slager. He's an expert in the field.

I'm afraid even psychiatrists don't have any simple answers.

Well, I'm no psychiatrist. I'm no expert. I'm just his wife. But I know

thing, Arthur. I love him, and I will not live my life without him.

Oh, Carol, I feel so useless.

Arthur, you've done all you can. But it's not enough.

Here I am a doctor, a highly trained man of medicine.

And I can't even do a thing to help my best friend.

I feel so inadequate.

Sometimes I think I should just pack it all in and give up golf.

What?

Well, I can't give up medicine. It's the only thing I know.

But I feel I should give up something.

I'm sorry I broke it to you that way. It's just something that... Please,

Walter.

I understand.

You do?

Of course I do.

Oh, what a relief.

Lord, that place is doing wonders for me.

I'll level with you.

In a way, I'm really ready to come out.

But I'm afraid to, you know what I mean?

Walter, nobody understands fear better than I do.

Boy, you look great.

It's... Tell me, Walter, what do they wear at the center?

Oh, just casual clothes.

It's really good for me there. Excuse me, dear. Is this too dressy? That's

I feel I'm getting in touch with myself there. I'm creating a whole new space

for me. Do they give you nightclothes?

You bring what you want.

And for the first time in my life, I can hold myself up to a strong light and

see who I am.

Walter, do they have a pool there?

No.

No, I suddenly feel free to ask the big questions.

What are you?

What are you looking for?

What are you searching for?

What are you packing for?

I'm going back with you, Walter.

Oh, come on, Maud.

No, Walter, if all you need to get in is fear, I qualify.

Maud, be serious.

Honey, I am serious.

You're running away from life, Walter, which means you're running away from me,

and that scares the hell out of me.

But you're not afraid like I am, Maud. You're strong. You're stable.

Stable? I'm stable?

Walter, does this look like something a stable person would do?

Walter, I have hidden every sharp object in the house. Tearing knives, carving

knives, pan openers, even the fondue forks.

How about this for stability?

Two mucklucks filled with every pill in our medicine.

I need you, Walter. I need you desperately.

I need you, too.

It's not like I'm leaving you.

I never even thought about it like that.

You mean so much to me.

It's just that... Walter, I'm a very selfish person.

You mean everything to me.

Walter, when we found out you were an alcoholic, I wanted to run away, but I

didn't. I was selfish. I had to have you with me.

And when I was running for office and we were separated...

I couldn't stand being apart from you. I was selfish. I had to have you.

Walter, after all we've been through together, this whole

business with the bankruptcy should be a piece of cake.

If you don't see it that way, then I'm just going to have to be selfish again.

I'm not going to let you share your life with anyone else.

If I can't have you here with me, I'll have to go there with you.

Mort, stop packing.

Stop packing.

This time I'll be selfish.

I'm staying here.

Walter, do you really mean it? Yes, I do.

I never knew you needed me so much.

If we were to go down there and tell them this story...

They'd think we were beyond help. We'd never get in.

But, Mort, I'm still afraid.

Oh, darling, everybody is afraid. We just said it out loud to each other.

Walter, you're going to make it. I know you will.

You really have faith in me, don't you? Oh, darling, all the faith in the world.

Whiskers. Yeah.

I need a shave.

And after you finish shaving, why don't you come downstairs?

We'll have some coffee and fruitcake.

And nuts and bananas.

Thank you.