Original subtitles

Lady Godiva was a freedom rider.

She didn't care if the whole world looked.

Joan of Arc with the Lord to guide her. She was a sister who really cooked.

Isadora was the first proper to. Ain't you glad she showed up?

Oh, yeah.

The country was falling apart.

Betsy Ross got it all sewed up.

And Betsy Ross.

And then there's mud.

And then there's mud.

And then there's mud.

And then there's mud. And then there's mud.

That uncompromising, enterprising, anything but tranquilizing.

Oh, come on, Walter.

I want to go back to the hotel.

Oh, come on, old buddy.

Don't be a fiesta poopo.

That's Spanish for party pooper.

Arthur just made a Mexican joke.

He did?

Well, if you were Mexican, you'd laugh at it. The last Mexican joke I laughed

was Charo.

I don't want any dinner.

I want to go back to the hotel. Come on, Walter.

Tonight's the last night of our vacation.

All you've done since we've been down in Acapulco is worry about that new store

you're opening.

What if they don't deliver the fixtures or install the air conditioners? Walter,

will you stop worrying or so help me tonight I'm going to hide your

to open a new store and to come down to Acapulco and have a good time.

Well, the bank is certainly getting its money's worth because ever since we've

been here, you've had a lousy time.

And so have I.

Well, as long as we're having a lousy time, let's have it at the hotel.

Walter, wait.

Excuse me.

Now, Walter, sit down.

Lord, there goes the waiter.

Let's order some of those yummy drinks I love. Both of you had enough to drink

before we got here. Oh, come on, Arthur. We only had two margaritas at the hotel

and one in the cab.

Lord, can I order this time? Of course.

Senores, senoras, buenas noches.

Buenas noches.

Por favor, tres margaritas.

Three margaritas.

You understood me.

Come on, everybody. Let's just relax and have a wonderful dinner on our last

night. And maybe on the way back to the hotel, we could go through the red light

district. Vivian! Oh, Arthur.

I want to go see the floozies.

Vivian, have you ever actually seen one?

No, no, but I understand they wear an awful lot of eye shadow. And sometimes

boots.

Oh, wouldn't you just love to talk to one of them for five minutes?

I wouldn't know what to ask first.

You know what I've always wanted to know? What?

This is disgusting.

Shackles.

You hold it down, you're laughing so hard people are staring.

What? Maybe I should tell the maitre d' who I am. I mean, I told him at the

hotel to get in touch with me here in case Gordon called. Look, Gordon Coleman

is the best lawyer in the business.

Now, Walter, you hired him to look after your new store and the bank loan. He

can certainly handle anything that goes wrong.

Wrong? What, what wrong? Oh, Walter, will you stop?

Now, besides, honey, tonight is a celebration.

Tomorrow when we get home, you're going to be named Tuckahoe Businessman of the

Year. For the second year in a row.

That's quite an honor, Walter. And besides, when that second store opens,

going to be working seven days a week. You need this vacation, Walter, just as

much as I do.

We're men. It isn't as if we sit around all day like Maude and Vivian.

It's what we doctors call R &R.

Rest and relaxation.

In your case, you should call it DTH.

Death takes a holiday.

I'm not for him. He's an alcoholic.

El Lucho.

But you better be good to this man. He's a celebrity.

This is Walter Finley, Tuckahoe's businessman of the year.

He's going to receive his second gold tucky in a row tomorrow night.

Arthur, I don't think the waiter understands English.

Two takis!

Ah! Two tacos!

Never mind, waiter. We'll order later.

Vaya con Dios.

Let's take it easy.

This place looks very expensive, and we've already spent a fortune down here.

Oh, Walter!

Everything just sounds so delicious.

I wonder what it all is. Oh, I'm not sure. Oh, but aren't these Spanish words

beautiful? I mean, they sound like they should be in a song.

Tomales to go.

Tomales to go.

Thank you very much. Maybe tomorrow on the way to the airport, I'll sing a few

billboards for you.

Excuse me, señora.

Are you an American vocalist?

Oh, no, I'm not. Not really. Although I was once mistaken for Olivia Newton

-John.

Well, perhaps you would honor us with a song.

Oh, dear. Oh, Lordy, sing a little song. I really couldn't. I'm sorry.

Mucho gracias.

Lord, listen to what he's playing.

I don't believe it.

Spanish eyes.

Walter, our song.

You remember.

How could I forget?

That's what we heard when we first met.

Walter, they were playing it on that radio you sold me.

Listen, Walter.

I've had enough marguerites tonight to do this. If you stop worrying about

business tonight, I'll sing Spanish eyes.

Oh. Do you really know how to get to a guy, Maude?

That's good.

Señor. Sí.

Señor.

I've changed my mind. I'd like to sing Spanish eyes.

Oh, qué bueno.

Señoras y señores, la casa Flores...

presenta con muchisimo gusto Miss Olivia Newton -John.

She's at least five years younger than I am.

Oh, Walter, just you and me and a soft guitar.

Vanish I.

So much for romance.

Wait, what's this? We haven't even ordered yet.

Mole con pollo, huevos ranchero, tostada, enchilada, y verde

ensalada, and dos tamales to go.

Oh,

he brought everything you sang off the menu.

I'm glad you didn't sing the September song. We'd be here all month.

Amigos, amigos, time for the tamba. Oh, the tamba. Oh, the tamba. Come on,

everybody, let's dance.

Come on, everybody, let's dance.

Oh,

how do you miss fun?

Señor Finley.

Come una ocasión from your hotel.

Communication from your hotel. Communication from your hotel. A message

hotel.

This is in Spanish, si?

El senor Gordon Coleman, al amado al telefono. Mr. Gordon Coleman, telephone?

Si, si.

El banco reusa a darle un prestamo. What's el banco?

El banco. El banco. El banco. Si, si, si. Now, what about this? Reusa a darle

prestamo. Un prestamo. Un prestamo.

Oh!

He's putting on his tuxedo because this is such an important night for you,

Walter. You big businessman of the year, you.

Shirley, will you please tell Gordon to get down here?

Oh, he'll be along. He'll be along.

Just imagine, yesterday you two were down in sunny Acapulco, and today you're

back home in Tuckahoe. Isn't that amazing? Isn't it simply incredible?

No.

Gordon wants us to take a trip to Mexico, but I don't know.

Seems like such a long way to go just to see foreign people.

Especially when New York's just 20 minutes away.

I'll go tell Gordon you're here, you double -tuggy winner, you.

You know, for a nice person, Shirley really bugs the hell out of me.

Gordon, will you get down here?

What?

When I phoned Gordon... After we got home this afternoon, he said the

was very serious. Oh, come on. Walter, will you relax? You know how Gordon

always exaggerates. How can I open up the new store without that $50 ,000

Most of the money is spent already.

Walter. I never should have let you buy all those things in Acapulco.

Walter, I bought one souvenir.

A ceramic planter of a little Mexican boy with a cactus growing out of his

burrow.

I only bought that one because I knew nobody else had one.

More.

Ravishing.

Never mind that, Gordon. What about the loan?

Walter, be patient. Gordon is our friend. We haven't seen him in a week.

know, I was in Acapulco once. It was during the war. Gordon, what about the

loan?

Oh, yes. Well, actually, it's very simple.

Oh, it's getting late. I'd better get started.

You see, your cash flow has retreated.

from a preferred position in the face of unrealized collection capabilities.

That placed your reserve factor in a vulnerable phase which caused the bank

realign its stance on your promissory note commitments.

Please, Gordon, in English. In English.

Oh, yes, all right. In plain English, your liquidity situation has been locked

into a negative level.

Walter, your liquidity situation has been locked into a negative level.

Thank you. What does that mean? I haven't the foggiest.

What it means is that you owe a lot of money.

Times are tight. All of a sudden, a lot of your customers started defaulting on

their payment.

With all the expenses of the new store, it was just too much.

Gordon, how much money do we owe?

Oh, I'm not sure.

Oh, come on, Gordon. You've been managing my finances for years.

Yes, I know, but I'm not too good with figures.

I'd say roughly $20 ,000.

Gordon, we owe $20 ,000.

Where am I going to find $20 ,000?

Lord, why don't you leave these boys alone? Come upstairs with me and help me

pick out a pair of earrings. I can't decide which ones to wear.

How would you like to buy mine?

Shirley, honey.

We're trying to talk business.

Oh, business, business, business. Come on, Mort. No, I don't think so. Come on,

let's go upstairs and have some giggles. Shirley, we just found out we are $20

,000 in debt. We have no idea where we're going to get the money. Can you

understand that?

Well, I'm glad we're not going to be at your table tonight. You're not going to

be any fun at all.

I'm terribly sorry if Shirley seemed insensitive.

She doesn't really understand these things.

We're rich.

More.

$20 ,000.

Look, Gordon, there must be some way out of this.

Of course there's a way out of it. You see, Walter, what did I tell you?

Gordon is the best lawyer in the business. He is a lawyer's lawyer.

Okay, Gordon, tell us. What are we going to do?

Declare bankruptcy?

And you call yourself a lawyer.

Bankruptcy? Sure. We'll protect your house and your personal savings, pay off

your business debts at ten cents on the dollar, and you're home free.

Twenty -five years down the drain.

Oh, Walter, I know how you feel.

But believe me, this is no big deal.

I've handled dozens of cases just like yours. Big businessmen who have lost

their business.

They all landed on their feet again.

Stu Dempsey, Mel Bates.

Landed on their feet again?

Stu Dempsey's a parking lot attendant.

Mel Bates died without a penny.

Really?

Well, I don't keep in touch with those guys much anymore.

Stu Dempsey is a parking lot attendant?

Gordon, isn't there anything else we can do?

No, I'm sorry. I think a form of bankruptcy is the only way to go.

And you mean all those people who trusted me, depended upon me, I'm going

stick them for $20 ,000?

Well, yes.

And you say it's okay? I say it's legal. It's business.

It's the American way.

Look, why don't we have lunch tomorrow and we'll start the bankruptcy

proceedings? I'd better finish up and get ingressed.

And hey, don't let this spoil your evening.

I'm glad he's taking it so well.

Lord, I'm sorry.

You married a failure.

A lousy failure. Oh, come on, Walter. It's not your fault. You're a victim of

the economy.

You know why I decided to open a new store?

Because the chairman of the Federal Reserve went on television and said the

recession had bottomed out.

Then the secretary of the Treasury went on television and said that the economy

had returned to normal.

And then the president of the United States, the president, he went on

television and said we just started a period of vigorous economic growth.

You can't believe everything you hear.

Come on, sir.

Oh, no, Walter. We are going to that banquet.

Now, you are still Tuckahoe's businessman of the year. I'm not going

crawl into a hole because of this.

Mort, do you know when I realized I was a success?

It was in 1952.

I was married to Marta.

The store had been open a couple of years, and one night we drove downtown

movie.

And I realized that I could afford to park in the parking lot for 50 cents.

I didn't have to find a place out on the street six blocks away.

Now I'm 53 years old and I have to start looking for free parking places again.

Come on, honey. We'll make out. We have each other.

We have our savings. We have the house. We even have that radio you sold me.

Oh, that's not working either.

And you know the worst thing, Mark?

That little store, Findlay's Friendly Appliances, was the only real mark I

in this life.

Oh, how wrong you are, Walter.

Your contribution is you.

What are you talking about? I'm talking about a very special person, Walter.

Walter Findlay.

You treat everybody like a friend, no matter who they are. You make people

good and...

Honey, that's your contribution to the world, not the store.

Sweetheart, you are something else.

So are you.

Come on, let's hurry.

We want to get there in time to find a parking space on the street.

Bankrupt? Oh, Maude.

It's true.

I don't know what I'm going to do.

Oh, Walter.

Listen.

I just want you to know that I happen to have some spare cash just sitting

around the bank.

About $10 ,000.

Thanks, Arthur, but I couldn't let you do it. Oh.

Good. Come on, Bibb, let's find our table.

Maude, I really don't want to go in there. Oh, honey, I understand how you

but, sweetie, these people are here to honor you. You can't let them down.

Hi, Walter.

Tonight's the big night, isn't it? Sure is, Ernie. Hey, listen, I'd like to talk

to you and Maude later about Mexico.

You know, with the money that I'm making building your new store, I'll finally

be able to afford a vacation.

Sure thing, Ernie. I'll see you inside. Right.

Did you hear that?

Trip to Mexico.

What till he finds out I'm paying him ten cents on the dollar?

We could go to Spanish Harlem.

Well, how can I face those guys? I owe money to everybody in that room. Oh,

Walter, these people love you.

And they love you for who you are, not for what you've accomplished.

That's true, isn't it? Well, of course it's true.

Let's go in.

I say about our guest of honor tonight.

I'll bet there isn't anyone in this room who isn't benefiting from what Walter

Finley is doing for this town with that new store of his.

And as the painting contractor, I don't mind telling you that new store of his

is building that new house of mine.

Oh, I see I'm not the only one.

Oh, seriously, though, folks.

I guess you could say

Walter Finley invested in Tuckahoe, and we've invested in Walter Finley, because

he's a blue chip.

So, Walter Finley, it gives me great pleasure to present to you, as Tuckahoe

Businessman of the Year, your second annual Golden Tucky!

I'm honored.

When I look around and see old friends like Marty who

installed all the air conditioners and Ken who did the plumbing and you,

Ernie, who did all the construction and let's not forget Stu Dempsey out in the

parking lot.

Then I suddenly realized that what someone special told me just before I

here is true.

You love me for who I am, not for what I've accomplished.

That store actually belongs to you.

Because I can't pay you.

No, seriously, right, Maud?

You see, it's only fair to tell you that today I

went bankrupt.

You creep!

Ernie! Why would you do a thing like this to us?