All language subtitles for maude_s04e05_the_election

Lady Godiva was a freedom rider.

She didn't care if the whole world
looked.

Joan of Arc with the Lord to guide her.
She was a sister who really could.

Isadora was the first bra burner. Angel
Clats, she showed up.

Oh, yeah.

The country was falling apart.

Betsy Ross got it all sewed up.

And then there's more.

And then there's Maud.

And then there's Maud. And then there's
Maud. And then there's Maud. And then

there's Maud. And then there's Maud.
That'll compromise and enterprise and

anything but tranquilize. Right or not?

Walter? Good morning, Walter.

I said good morning, Walter.

Oh, Walter, how long are you going to
sleep? It's almost 5 a .m.

Walter.

Walter. Honey.

Walter, the polls are going to be open
in an hour.

Walter.

Walter, just think. This time tomorrow,
I could be the Democratic nominee for

New York State Senate. Walter, what do
you think of that?

I was afraid you'd say that.

Maybe there's some news.

They're not awake yet, either.

Ward, wake me up again when the float
with Betty White passes.

Walter, come on now.

It's a lovely day today.

Do whatever you've got to do.

Why do we have to get up so early?

Yes.

Well, there are only three reasons why a
wife would wake up her husband at five

in the morning.

To go fishing. I don't fish. To play
golf. I don't golf.

Or to... On the biggest day of my life,
Walter.

Walter.

Walter, the New York Times.

Walter, I've arrived.

There's an article about me in the New
York Times, Walter. The New York Times,

Walter. The New York Times.

The Times? New York.

In Westchester County, Democratic
favorite James Kunkel faces a strong

from newcomer Maude Findlay of Tuck.
Continued on page eight.

that makes water. This is a very happy
day for me, a very happy day.

Chuck, this is going to be a very big
day for you.

You are going to see the democratic
process in action.

You mean they're going to raise the
price of gasoline again?

Now, come on, you know perfectly well
that today is election day.

Look, since you're wide awake, why don't
you make us a very special breakfast

for a very special day? How about one of
your delicious omelets?

No, it'll have to be something else. I
made a vow never to break an egg. before

7 a .m. It's in honor of a chicken that
once saved my life.

How could a chicken save her life?

Mouth to beak resuscitation?

I have never seen you blue like you have
during this campaign.

Oh, and Walter, you're marvelous, too.
You know you've been an angel to go

through this with me. I don't think
there are many men who would let their

have this opportunity.

I'm glad you're my husband, Walter.

I'm glad you gargled. I'm sorry you
didn't.

What if you don't win?

I mean, you know, you don't have much of
a chance against Jim Kunkel. Oh, come

on, Walter. Who would vote for a man who
thinks we should bomb New Jersey?

Anyone who's ever lived in New Jersey?

Look, all I'm saying is I hope you're
prepared for a possible disappointment

tonight at your election party. Never,
Walter, never.

On the plains of desolation lie the
bones of countless thousands who,

nearing their goal... faltered. And
having faltered, died.

Johann Milo Schenck.

Wow. Wow. Who's that?

Philip's bowling coach.

Hey, you guys. Mother, have you
forgotten you're on television?

Wake up, Winchester.

Oh, I forgot. Channel 53.

It's on.

Senator Myers, one last question.

Do you feel that Ms. Finley will have a
harder time getting votes because she's

a woman?

Oh, women have made great strides
recently, and I think voters recognize

these are due times. Oh, maybe it's the
set. Yes, I think that people are

suspicious that strong party ties are
increasingly willing to vote for

candidates who respond to their needs,
no matter what their sex.

One final question.

A while back, our First Lady Betty Ford
had some rather astonishing things to

say about young women and premarital
sex.

Is it true, as I've heard recently, that
you personally agree with her remarks?

Yes, that is true. Oh, well, Maude, I
don't think that you actually agree with

it. Well, of course I do. I mean, all
Mrs. Ford said was that young people do

get involved in premarital
relationships, and even if you don't

they do. We should be able to talk to
them about it. In other words, Mrs.

Findlay believes, as I do, that we
should keep the lines of communication

to young people so that we can...

counsel them in the errors of their way.
So we can say that you do agree with

Mrs. Ford up to a point. That is
correct. I do agree with her up to a

And then at that point, I personally
would go much further.

It's a wonderful thing, and we're now
learning that it doesn't always have to

tied to husbands and wives.

I mean, if two people can have a happy
premarital relationship, well, they

get lucky and carry it over into their
marriage.

Like I did.

Four times.

Oh, thank you, Senator Myers, and thank
you, Mrs. Finley. And now, back to the

news. Oh, Mother, you were terrific.

That was sensational.

Is Senator Myers really that square?

I don't think so. He just feels that if
you make an even mildly controversial

remark on television, your phone will
start ringing off the hook.

Hello.

Oh, you saw it.

How dare you use language like that on
the telephone?

Oh, yeah? Well, the same to you,
Reverend.

First customers.

Oh, well, I hope we're not your last.

If I'm going to pile up votes, we'll
need a big turnout.

Pardon me, but may I ask you a personal
question?

Yes.

Is that a maiden form bra you're
wearing?

Yes, why?

I'm going to have to switch.

for state senate. You've probably seen
my picture in the newspapers.

Oh, no, no, no, that's not it. I thought
that maybe we went to school together.

The eyes go first.

I'd like to invite all of you to my
victory party tonight at the Ramada Inn.

Now I know why you look familiar.

You were on that TV show this morning
advocating premarital hanky -panky.

I saw that. And I think it will cost you
the election.

You offended every decent citizen in the
community.

That's a lot of bull.

My theory is you don't buy a shoe
without trying it on first.

Mother, it's your turn. Go ahead.

Have you been doing this for a long
time? Oh, no, no.

I didn't start until 1920.

I'll bet she remembers Teapot Dome.

Damn that Teapot Dome.

Sign here.

When was taking Mother so long?

I thought I was prepared for it, but
when I saw my name on that ballot, I

just like Franklin D. Roosevelt or Harry
Truman, John F. Kennedy.

Oh, Mother, that's wonderful.

I mean, it's incredible, Carol, that
people can vote for you or vote against

you, but, I mean, the right to vote,
your vote, Carol's vote, my vote.

Oh, my God, I forgot to vote.

Oh?

Okay, Mother, this is it. No, wait,
Carol.

Oh, my moment of glory.

You know, whenever I work for other
candidates in other campaigns, the

part was the election night party now
the candidate would walk in and the band

would strike up for he's a jolly good
fellow and the crowd would scream and

shout and the candidate would shake
hands and say thank you for all your

was a real thrill let's go in and give
this crowd a real

thrill

has been pretty easy so far.

Where is everybody? What happened?

Oh, they must know about the party.

Oh, now, let's not get excited, Walter.
I mean, it's probably a very simple

explanation. Let's all stay calm. Give
me a double anything.

Hey, what's going on here?

Where's the corpse?

Oh, Arthur.

We're sorry to be late, Maude, but we
dropped into another party by mistake

downstairs in the Cardinal Richelieu
room.

Yeah, buddy, we... We accidentally
stumbled into a party for your opponent,

James Kunkel. You should see it down
there. The joint is really jumping. You

mean a lot of people there? No, no, just
a handful.

What do you mean a handful? The place is
jammed.

And when Kunkel came in, they cheered
and applauded. They went crazy.

Father, it doesn't mean a thing. And I
didn't see anybody there from your

campaign. No, except Senator Bob Myers.
Arthur!

You're joking.

I cannot believe that Senator Bob Myers,
my biggest supporter, was down at

Kunkel's party.

Oh, but he is, Marty.

He's even making jokes about his hokey
hair transplant.

He's probably just there to congratulate
Kunkel on his victory.

What victory? The polls just closed.

See? Kunkel wins.

Yeah, it says, uh, with our straw poll
now in, our political editor, Al

projects a 60 % vote for party regular
James Kunkel over his neophyte opponent,

Maude Findlay.

song you know?

Obviously, the only things they play are
political rallies and bar mitzvahs.

Hi there, Senator.

I'm sorry, Maude. It doesn't look too
good for you, but I want you to know...

I think you put up a terrific fight.

Vivian, would you ask the band if they
know the theme from Jaws?

Oh, now, wait a minute, Maude. I
wouldn't even have been down there if

hadn't gone on television this morning
and endorsed sin.

I did not endorse sin. It was sex, and
there was nothing sinful about it.

Maude, I agree with the senator.

I agree with him. You know what this
premarital business leads to?

Moral decay?

Economic collapse?

Health food?

Maud, you're in politics, and a
politician has an obligation to get

Now, I'm with you, but if our views just
happen to be controversial, well, a

good politician just...

Keeps it to himself.

Yes, but all my views are controversial.
Everything I believe in is

controversial. Gun control, women's
rights, racial equality.

The only popular belief I have is my
foreign policy.

What's that? If you're in Mexico, don't
drink the water.

Now, I can hardly get elected on that.

Face it, Maude, you killed your own
chances.

Maybe so.

But I'd rather lose on my beliefs than
win on hypocrisy.

Hey, Grandma, come here. They're talking
about you on the news. Maude, you know

absolutely nothing about politics.

Bob, do me a favor. If ever you get to
Mexico, try the water.

And polling places all over Westchester
County report heavy activity throughout

the late afternoon and evening. The
turnout is already reported to be the

highest in years.

And by the time the final tallies come
in, it may well prove to be an all -time

record for a primary.

Now, this could be bad news.

for longtime Democratic leader James L.
Conkle, who was counting on a light

turnout. Chief beneficiary of the heavy
vote is newcomer Maude Finley, the wife

of a Tuckahoe appliance dealer.

Mets in the name of the storm!

The new politics in action apparently
helped motivate the large voter turnout.

Before this night is over, we may be
reporting an upset in Westchester

15 minutes ago, Maude. You never started
the party before the polls closed.

Didn't you know that?

No, I didn't know that. Did you know
that?

I didn't know that. I didn't know that.
I didn't know that. Did you know that? I

didn't know that. I didn't know that.
Did you? I didn't know that.

What is it? I just wanted to say I
didn't know that.

I hate you.

How nice to see you.

Oh, give him hell.

Oh, baby.

...in Westchester County. Earlier this
week, it looked like a shoe -in for

favorite James L. Kunkel, but an
unexpected last -minute heavy turnout

life to the spirited campaign of
political newcomer Maude Finley of...

It's nip and tuck.

Punkle slightly ahead by one percentage
point. This one could go right down to

the wire.

Ladies and gentlemen, friends, may I
have your attention, please?

It's an honor for me to be associated
with Maud Finder.

And I want to congratulate our Maud.

on a great campaign.

A campaign that proves that speaking out
on the issues can make a

front -runner out of a dark horse.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Senator
Bob Myers.

It's so nice to meet a politician whose
main strength is the weakness of his

convictions.

Hasn't she got a great sense of humor?

Ladies and gentlemen, you remember Dewey
Wynn?

Oh, I tell you right now, I feel the way
Harry Truman must have felt that night.

Oh. And I feel like Bess.

Everybody, my husband, Walter. Oh.

Our friendly, friendly appliances.

You gargled.

that a woman has the same need for
purposefulness as a man.

And that, my friends, is real love.

Of course, the election isn't over yet,
but I have to tell you how

satisfying it is to be taken seriously
as a candidate for public office.

And to all of you who worked so hard
helping me, I love you. I love all of

especially those young people who
created the late surge at the polls.

have been the ones who agreed with what
I said on television this morning and

were obviously too busy doing other
things to vote her over.

Japan. Boy,

what a bunch of party poopers.

Come on, Grandma, wake up.

Oh, what time is it and who won?

I said, what time is it,

Philip? Ten after four. And who won?

That was the Yankee Street in Athens.

I mean the election, Philip. Who won the
election?

Oh, Mrs. Finley, I can't stand the
excitement.

I've just heard on the four o 'clock
news that the lead has changed hands

Who is ahead?

Who is ahead?

Either you or Mr. Cunningham.

I forget which.

Can't you remember anything?

At five o 'clock in the morning, I can't
remember anything.

But you just said it was four.

You see?

Arthur. Yeah? Don't you know somebody on
the Tuckahoe Tribune?

I mean, they ought to have some late
news.

As a matter of fact, one of my very best
buddies is on the city desk at the

Trib. We're always doing favors for each
other.

Last year, I took out his appendix, and
he took out my nurse.

That's how Arthur always knows what's
going to happen to Mary Worth two days

ahead of time.

Hello, Trib?

Harry Foley, please.

Arthur Harmon here.

Harmon.

Dr. Harmon.

Hi, Harry.

Listen, if it isn't too much trouble, do
you have the final vote count on the

Maude Finley -Jim Kunkel race?

Oh, really?

She did?

She did. She had.

Boy,

are you kidding? Isn't that something?

Well, you're not going to... What did he
say? What are all these figures?

Well, what do you know?

Now, listen, Harry, if it's not too
inconvenient, can you tell me what's

to happen with Mary Worth's toothache?
Oh, really?

Wow. Well, thanks a lot, Harry.

Right.

Come on. Come on, Harvey. Tell us. Tell
us. Well, Mary is having this root

canal.

But the amazing thing is that out of 80
,000 votes, you only lost by 360.

360. Oh, no. 360.

Oh, Mother, Mother, you did great. It
was a moral victory. And get this. In

district, right here, you only lost by
one vote.

One vote?

One vote? That's amazing. I can't
believe it. Just one vote.

One vote?

Like, that means that just one person in
the district, I mean, it could have

been... It could have been one person
here in this room. Could have cost me

whole district.

All right, who was the fink who voted
for Gunfold?

Don't look at me. I didn't vote. I'm a
Republican. I know. Oh, Mother, I don't

have to tell you how I voted.

Maude, I have a confession to make.

I didn't want you to move away.

Oh, good Lord, my best friend in the
whole world.

So I'm glad you didn't win.

I just never dreamed, Vivian, that you
would be the one who wouldn't vote for

me.

No, I voted for you. I'm just glad you
didn't win.

Mother, who in this room would have a
reason to vote against you?

Well, Walter.

Huh?

I said, well, Walter.

Fine, and you?

of the voting booth.

Maude, I voted for our marriage.

What a rotten thing to do.

I'll tell you.

I voted for the most beautiful, the most
adorable, the sexiest candidate in the

race.

Walter. Did you ever see Conkle in a
bathing suit?

All right, be cagey, citizen -friendly.

Walter, I guess I'm back to being a full
-time wife again.

My lord.

You know, I'll bet I can unseat Bob
Myers next time. Next time? What do you

mean? I mean, I have two whole years
now, you know, to prepare me. Now, wait

minute. Oh, you love living in
Washington.

Washington? I'll buy a couple of big
raps. You know what they do?