All language subtitles for maude_s02e24_the_runaway

Lady Godiva was a freedom rider.

She didn't care if the whole world
looked.

Joan of Arc with the Lord to guide her.
She was a sister who really could.

Isadora was the first bra burner. Ain't
you glad she showed up?

Oh, yeah.

When the country was falling apart,
Betsy Ross got it all sewed up.

And then there's Maud.

And then there's Maud. And then there's
Maud. And then there's Maud. And then

there's Maud. And then there's Maud.
That uncompromising, enterprising,

but tranquilizing. Right on, Maud.

Arthur, where are you? You and Viv were
supposed to pick us up 20 minutes ago.

Yeah, and don't tell me you got
passionate during dinner again.

Again?

Yeah, well, tell Viv to stop sprinkling
vitamin E on your artichokes.

I really regret the day I ever
recommended that.

Hold on, I can't find my white
suspenders. Honey, you won't be doing

tonight. You can hold your pants up with
your hands.

Now, come on, Walter, get down here.

Now, look, Arthur, Walter did not put
out $50 per ticket to take us to a

benefit just so you could be a half hour
late. Now, get over here, will you?

You're crying out loud, Ward. What did
you do with my suspenders?

Walter, why am I responsible for your
suspenders? Because you always put

where I can't find them. Always, Ward.
You always put things where I can't find

them. You're right, Walter.

And I'm sorry, sweetheart.

Actually, if you want your suspenders,
you'll find them hanging off the roof.

I find them very handy for washing the
basement and second -story windows at

same time.

No. I'm sorry. Honey, I'll help you find
them. You know, we're going to be late.

I'm going to miss all the guest
celebrities.

Come on. No, everybody who's anybody is
going to be there tonight.

Derwood Kirby, Poopy Campo, Carmelita
Pope, Arlene Francis, the entire panel

from What's My Line.

Oh, you don't care if I miss all the
fun.

Poopy Campo?

Well, go on.

I can't.

Get moving, Francie. What are you
waiting on?

I thought you told me you'd have no
trouble pulling this hustle.

Hinkley, would you cool it? It ain't
gonna be easy to out -talk Maude Finley.

She's the world's champ.

She's got a bigger mouth than Mohamed
Ali.

Okay, but just make sure you lay it on
real good about your father beating you

up. Why can't I just tell her the truth?

Because why gamble on the truth when we
got such a good, honest lie?

Hinkley, I don't feel good about lying
to Mrs. Finley. I lived here for two

weeks.

Chicken, it's our future.

I mean, don't you think I'm going to
feel rotten, too, hiding out there

the bush when I should be in there
helping you pick her clean?

Hinkley, you do love me, right? I told
you, I am your main man.

Now, don't forget to let us see the
bandages, okay? Now, get in there and

your heart out.

Well, here goes our future.

Well, it's about time.

Francie! Francie!

if that's what you want. Actually, we
were on our way to the theater anyway.

Oh, don't hold me!

to ask the same question.

Nancy, you are in trouble. Now, honey,
why don't you tell me all about it?

That's what I'm here for.

Well, this isn't something that you just
come right out and talk about just like

that. Oh, good.

Because we're on our way to the theater
and we're late now. So, honey, why don't

you just lie down there, cry your little
heart out, and when we get back from

the theater, we'll have a good long
talk. No!

It'll be too late then.

Nancy.

Francie, are you in trouble with a gang?

Are they getting together and getting
ready for a ramble tonight?

Walter, I hope you're not coming after
her with a switch knife.

Come on.

Come here.

Has it occurred to you that she may just
be in trouble?

Oh, come on, Walter. The child's only
16.

Almost 17.

Just because she comes from the ghetto
doesn't mean that she knows...

Francie, are you with child?

No, I came here alone.

It's my father, Mrs. Finley. He's been
beating me.

Oh, no, Francie. You mean he went upside
your head.

Mrs. Finley, you'll understand better if
we talk white people's talk.

He's beating the hell out of me.

Well, look at the bright side, Vivian.
It matches your gown.

You both remember Francie Potter?

Well, well, well, Francie Potter.

Maude's little experiment in race
relations.

It didn't work, you know, Francie.
Maude's still white.

Come on, Francie. We'll have a little
chit -chat in the kitchen. What's going

here? First you rush us over here and
then you run off? Vivian, this is an

emergency. Fix your hair.

Well, what can you expect of a woman who
has suspenders hanging from the roof?

Okay, now, Francie, come on. You tell me
all

about it.

Well, Mrs. Finley, I was going to come
in here and lie to you.

But you're too nice.

Besides, what's the sense of lying?

You know me too well.

Thank you, dear. I mean, I live in the
suburbs, but... It's true. My heart's in

the ghetto.

Right.

Anyway.

Honey,

what's the matter?

Oh, it's nothing.

Just a little bruise. A little bruise?
Francie, let me look. No.

They took care of it in the emergency
ward already.

My father did it.

That's why I'm running away from home.

Oh, Francie, running away? Honey, what
about your mother?

Oh, she wanted to come along, too. But
she's 53. She's too slow.

Maude. Walter, I found out what's
troubling the child.

She is running away from home because of
her father's beatings. Oh, come on,

Francie. Why would your father beat you?

Poor misguided honky.

Walter, you know nothing about the
child's environment.

She's a victim of the battered child
syndrome. I read all about it in

As a matter of fact, I think I may still
have the article.

It's on the back of the recipe, a
thousand and one ways to disguise elbow

macaroni.

Well, Walter, let's go. We'll miss all
the pre -show activities in the lobby.

Arthur Harmon, Francie is more important
than watching Doc Severance and put his

mouthpiece in a time capsule.

We're missing that?

Look, Francie, dear, you can tell me.
Now, your father, the one who beat you,

had he been drinking?

Yeah. Oh, how did you know?

Oh, this afternoon he came home
bloodshot from head to toe. He slammed

so hard the lights went on.

That's when he hit me.

But why?

That's when he saw me.

Then he picked up my brother's little
league baseball bat, the one we used to

stun the roaches.

Boy, I want to talk to you. Come here.

What? Will you come with me? I want to
talk to you.

Walter, not now. I am going to call the
police and report that man. Lord, there

isn't one shred of evidence that she's
telling the truth.

Walter, Francie loves me. She would not
lie to me.

A baseball bat to stun the roaches?

Yeah, that's why they're such good
hitters.

Maude, Walter, we're going to wait in
the car. Awesome.

And if you're not out there...

After all you've put us through, we're
leaving without you, and that's that.

Nobody's going to spoil my evening.
Arthur!

Uh, by the by, old buddy.

Since we're your guests tonight, could
you let me have the tickets you bought

for us?

Sure, old buddy.

Thanks, John.

I mean it! Five minutes or we're leaving
without you, and that's final.

I'm sorry, Walter.

If it occurred to me, it must have
sounded very unreasonable what I said.

should I put you on a five -minute
deadline?

We'll go right now. You can take your
own car.

Give my regards to Broadway.

What do you mean, give your regards to
Broadway? We're going to the theater.

Not as long as that child is in trouble,
we are not going.

All right, Francie.

Now, you tell me, dear, what can we do
to help? What?

All she's asking for is a little love
and understanding.

And $300. And $300.

He's just alone.

So I can start a new life.

I want to go live with my friend in Los
Angeles. An older friend. An adult.

Francie, you're only 16.

Almost 17.

I can't go back home to my father. He'll
kill me.

You're right. You don't have much of a
choice.

Oh, little Francie Potter, all grown up
and starting a new life.

Seems like only yesterday she was a
little tiny baby.

Maud, you've only known her three
months.

How would you like to hold your breath
that long?

Look, Francie, we're going to give you a
start, aren't we, Walter?

No.

He's such a tease. Look, Francie, dear,
why don't you help yourself? After your

beating, you must be hungry.

Oh, good. You're calling the police. No,
the Potters. You can't do that, Walter.

What? That child running away from home
is breaking up a family, and I'm not

going to be any party to that.

Oh, hello, Mr. Potter. This is Walter
Finley. Listen, your daughter's here,

we have theater tickets, and we want...
Mr. Potter, you're a beast.

Someday when you sober up, you'll thank
me for this.

Your breath reeks of liquor even on the
phone.

Francie, dear, you are going to get your
$300, and that's a prize.

Lord! Oh, come on now, Walter. She's
going there to live with an adult.

It's not like she'll be alone.

Honey, how much cash do you have on you?
Not nearly enough.

Oh, well, Arthur usually has a lot of
cash, possibly between him and Viv and

and him. We'll get you the money, dear.
Now, why don't you just sit down and

enjoy yourself, and we'll be back right
after the theater with the money, and if

we hurry, maybe we can still catch one
of Johnny Carson's ex -wives.

fourth time this year that you've killed
my battery. Walter, will you quit

crying long enough to call the
automobile club?

Just mention my name, they'll
understand.

California, here we come!

California, here we come!

Francie!

Um, back from the theater so soon?

Oh my, how time flies!

It certainly does, particularly... When
you're making whoopee with the adult

you're going to be living with in
California.

Francie Potter, how could you do this to
me? How?

All right, so your father beat you, so
he's cruel. I can accept that.

But I cannot accept the fact that you
deceived me into giving you $300 to go

on a whoopee trip to California.

Just so that you can...

Can shack up.

Please, Walter, not in front of the
children.

Mrs. Finley, I mean, you have the wrong
impression about the kind of dude I am.

Look, Mr. Dude.

Mrs. Finley. Come on, Francie. You know
darn well I wouldn't have given you the

money for anything like this. But we're
going to be married.

I don't care if you gave me a thousand.

Married? Oh, Walter.

Walter, they're going to be married.
Mark, she's only 16. Going on 17.

Oh, no, you're right.

Francie, honey, come over here. Sit down
with me. I want to talk to you.

Oh, Francie, I know it sounds so
romantic, getting married, running off

California, but, honey, what are you
going to do when the money runs out?

Remember, when the landlord comes
through the door, love flies out the

Or is it the other way around?

Well, anyway, I know because I was first
married when I was 17.

That's almost my age.

Was it a nice wedding, Mrs. Finley?
Well, Francie, this has nothing to do...

We honeymooned at Lake Pottawatomie in
the back of a pickup truck.

Oh, I also... Oh, come on now, Francie,
don't do this to me.

Oh, Walter, don't you see? They're young
and they're in love.

What? Mr. Finley, you heard her. She
says she first got married when she was

That's different. She was making a
career out of it.

17. I mean, I don't think you know what
you're doing, Francie. You can't just

run off with no thought, no plan.

Oh, that's the part I was saving for
last.

Hinkley planned for our future so our
life will be financially secure.

Yeah, see, we're breaking into rock and
roll, and we're going to go to Hollywood

and record for Motown.

Mo -who?

Motown. It's a record company.

Me and Hinkley's a group.

The Electric Shortcake.

Patrick Fruitcake?

Go to Hollywood and make a million
dollars overnight? Come on!

We don't expect to become millionaires
overnight.

It's a long, hard grind.

It's going to take us maybe two, three
weeks.

Not long.

Yeah, sure. I mean, you can't just rush
into these things, even when you got

talent like me and Hinkley. Hey, come
on, Hinkley. Let's show them. Okay.

I'm the only rock and roll talent player
in the world.

You ready?

One, two, three.

record business ever heard you play?

No, ma 'am, but that's what's so cool.

We're total unknowns.

Can I see you in the kitchen?

Yankee doodle.

They are really rotten.

But, Walter, who are we to say? I mean,
the closest we've ever come to rock and

roll is the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Lord, they don't have a chance.

Oh, Walter, who knows? For instance, who
would ever have dreamed that Frankie

Lane would make all that money singing
Mule Train?

Mule Train!

Ha! Clippity -clop, clippity -clop,
clippity -clop. Oh, I love that. Ha!

Ha! Ha!

Ha! Lord!

That's not Frankie Lane out there.
That's a couple of kids caught up in a

Hollywood fantasy.

Oh, Walter, wait.

I'm waiting.

Look, I'm sorry, kids.

But we're not giving you a nickel.
Walter. But Mrs. Finley promised.

You're right. Mrs. Finley promised. And
Mrs. Finley is going to give you her own

money. Maude, I forbid it.

Walter, she has no alternative.

She's a little child from the ghetto.
She can't go home. And she's too short

play center for the Harlem
Globetrotters.

Maude! Walter!

Do they always hassle each other like
this? Oh, yeah. Ain't it cool?

Maude, if you insist on giving her
money, I'm warning you.

a husband, I'll have to take the proper
action. Oh, what are you going to do,

Walter? Beat me? Hit me? Like Francie's
father?

I'll... I'll call a cop!

Francie is entitled to this one chance
at happiness.

And I am going to make sure that she
never has to meet that drunken monster

father of hers again.

I'm Francie's father.

in the kitchen till cooler heads
prevail, okay?

It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Potter.

Francie, you're coming home with me
right now.

Don't you dare lay a hand on her
helpless head, you drunken sot!

What'd you say?

How dare you inflict your mindless
cruelties on this innocent child?

Woman, what are you talking about?

You cowards are all the same. Always
picking on the defenseless.

Well, go ahead and hit me!

standing right there.

Mark, please.

Why doesn't he pick on someone his own
size?

There isn't anyone his size.

Now look here, Mrs. Findlay. Don't you
Mrs.

Findlay me, you big barge. Your drunken
child -beating days are over.

Will you shut up?

Walter, did you hear what this monster
actually said to me? Yes, he said,

will you shut up? A very common
expression frequently heard in our

I don't know where you got the idea that
I drink.

I've got an ulcer.

Have you ever heard of anybody getting
drunk on Maalox?

And what's this about me bidding up on
my girl?

Francie, I never hit you.

Well, only because she was afraid you'd
kill me.

Francie, you lied to me.

I had to. The truth wouldn't have been
worth $300.

Wait a minute.

Me first.

Walter, poor Mr.

Potter of Malox.

Francie, I went to bat for you. I even
fought with my husband. But you do that

anyway. That's beside the point.

I trusted you because I thought you were
my friend.

Well, friends like you are a dime a
dozen, and they're overpriced. Who needs

Walter, call a cab. We're going to the
theater.

I'm sorry, Mrs. Finley. Really, I am. I
didn't want to lie to you. I'm sure you

didn't. No, no. Hinckley said that if I
didn't get the money for him, he

wouldn't marry me and take me to
California.

mean that you are dumb enough to let a
ding -a -ling like Hinkley talk you into

a thing like this?

Hinkley's no ding -a -ling. You're
right, honey. You're the ding -a -ling.

I mean, letting him talk you into doing
something against your better judgment

just because you were afraid that was
the only way you could hang on to him.

Hinkley's gone.

No, he's not. He wouldn't go without me.

I guess I am the ding -a -ling.

Um, Mr. Potter, would you excuse us for
a minute for, you know, girl talk?

I'm sorry, Dad.

Thanks all the time.

Oh,

Francie.

The Hinckleys in our lives really hurt,
don't they?

You know, there's even a name for them.

Stinkers.

Of course, I could talk to you woman to
woman and tell you that we do get over

them, but that wouldn't make you feel
any better, would it?

I just hope the next time you
contemplate one of these whoopee trips

come and we talk it over first.

Good night, Mrs. Finley.

Thank you.

Well, that's show business.

Well, Maude, looks like she learned a
lesson.

Oh, wrong, Walter.

Bless her heart, she's still lying
through her teeth.

All that boy has to do is rattle his
spoons and she'll be off like a shot.

Oh, I just hope Hinkley's really gone
for good.

Oh, don't worry, Mort.

I'm positive he's gone off to pursue his
musical career.

How can you be sure?

When he left, he took every damn spoon
in the kitchen.

That's show business.

Maud was recorded on tape before a live
audience.