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WE'VE GOT TWO WHITE MALES ON THE RUN, DO YOU COPY?

- TRAFFIC? - SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

- ALL RIGHT, LET'S DO THIS.

- ALL RIGHT, LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH.

- HWAAH!

- YOU BETTER GO HOME NOW BEFORE MY DAD GETS HERE.

- GO HOME NOW? BABY GIRL,

I'M THE DADDY OF ALL DADDIES.

- YOU AIN'T GOT NO BUSINESS AROUND HERE.

- COME ON, YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT.

- SAY, BITCH. - YOU GOTTA GO HOME NOW

- BEFORE MY DADDY GET HERE. - I BETTER GO HOME NOW?

BABY GIRL, I AM THE DADDY OF ALL DADDIES.

- YOU AIN'T GOT NO BUSINESS AROUND HERE.

- I GOT BUSINESS AROUND HERE. I'M IN THE BUSINESS OF GETTING

MY MONEY. - WHAT MONEY?

- THE MONEY THAT'S IN THE BAG. - WHAT BAG, THIS BAG?

- YOU BETTER GIVE ME THAT HERE BAG. - Man: CUT.

- GIVE ME THAT BAG, BITCH. - Man: CUT.

- GIVE ME THAT BAG, BITCH.

- Man: CUT!

- VERY NICE, OH, DARLING, YOU'RE LOOKING WONDERFUL.

OH, YEAH, YOU CAN GO, THANKS.

GIRL, YOU GOT THE PARTS. UH, THE PART.

- UH-UH. NAH. - GIVE ME THE BAG!

- HEY, WAIT UP.

LONG TIME NO SEE, HOW YOU BEEN?

- HEY. UH, IT'S GONNA BE MY YEAR, YOU KNOW?

- YEAH. - CONGRATULATIONS ON THE PARTS.

- I KNOW EDDY J, DON'T MIND HIM.

- Man: GIVE ME THE BAG.

- I CAN'T SAY I WASN'T LOOKING TO--

- HOPEFULLY WE GET TO WORK TOGETHER AGAIN,

I HAD A REALLY, REALLY GOOD TIME.

- Man: CUT.

- HOW WAS THAT ONE FOR CAMERA? WAS IT COOL?

I HAD A GREAT TIME, ONE OF MY-- YOU LOOK GOOD THOUGH, LOVE.

IT'S ALWAYS GOOD SEEING YOU. - THANK YOU, YOU TOO.

- NO NEED FOR THE SUIT, BROTHER,

THE LAWYER'S ALREADY BEEN CAST.

YOU'LL BE READING THESE.

OFF YOU GO.

COME ON, WE DON'T HAVE ALL DAY.

- AHEM.

HWAAH!

I DEALS DRUGS BUT AIN'T NOTHING WRONG WITH WHAT I DO.

I'M THE GHETTO RIDER.

THE HOODS THE WAY IT READ.

STREET PUNKS

AND THE DOCTOR IS SEEN.

SHIT, IF I DON'T SUPPLY,

WHAT MY NIGGAS GON' GET HIGH AT?

THAT'S THE PROBLEM.

THAT AIN'T A PROBLEM,

THAT'S A MOTHERFUCKING PROBLEM.

- NOW YOU KNOW THAT IS SOME BULLSHIT, SON.

- NOT BLACK ENOUGH.

I KNOW BLACK. SHIT, I AM BLACK.

WELL, WHEN YOU SAY BLACK, WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU MEAN?

YOU KNOW, THUGGISH, GANGSTA,

A BROTHER THAT DON'T GIVE A FUCK.

BISHOP FROM JUICE.

A REAL NIGGA.

- MMM, KINDA LIKE MY STORY.

WHAT IS YOUR STORY?

MAN, NIGGA LIKE ME AIN'T NEVER EVEN KNEW MY POPS.

SEE, YOU COULD BE HIM FOR ALL I KNOW,

AND I WOULDN'T HAVE NO IDEA.

MOMMA DUKES OD'D ON CRACK WHEN I WAS SIX YEARS OLD

SO I HAD TO GET RAISED UP BY MY GRANDMOTHER.

TELL ME HOW THE HELL BIG MOMMA'S SUPPOSED TO RAISE A MAN?

COMMITTED MY FIRST ROBBERY AT, LIKE, 11.

SOME OLD-ASS WHITE LADY DIDN'T WANT TO SPARE A DOLLAR,

AND I ASKED THAT BITCH NICELY.

SON, I GOT TWO KIDS. MY NEW BITCH, SHE PREGNANT RIGHT NOW.

AND ON TOP OF ALL OF THAT,

I'M LOOKING AT, LIKE, 3 TO 5 RIGHT NOW

WITH POSSESSION WITH INTENT TO SELL UP IN RIKERS.

ALL THIS ACTING SHIT, MAN, THIS RIGHT HERE IS--

JUST MY WAY OF TRYING TO GET SOME MONEY, MAN.

- THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

- YOU FEEL ME? - I FEEL YOU, BROTHER.

- Man: I WANT TO GET YOU OUTSIDE.

- WHAT ARE YOU DOING UNDER THERE, MAN?

- MAINTENANCE, UH--

SMOOTHIN' THIS BABY OUT. WHAT'S UP, LOVE?

CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION? - SOUNDS LIKE YOU JUST DID.

- WHY DIDN'T YOU COME IN WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'RE ON THE SCHEDULE?

- I READ IT WRONG, MAN. - THAT'S BULLSHIT, MAN,

YOU COULDN'T LIE IN HIGH SCHOOL, YOU CAN'T LIE NOW.

CALL YOURSELF AN ACTOR, THAT'S GOOD.

WHAT'S UP, DENZEL?

- HEY LISTEN, MAN, FIRST OF ALL, ACTING IS THE TRUTH.

- OH, YEAH? HUH. - YEAH.

- SECONDLY, SHUT THE FUCK UP. - IS THE REAL COOL AN ACT?

THIS WHOLE THING RIGHT HERE, IS THIS IS AN ACT?

- IT'S MY WORK SPACE, MAN, I'M CHILLING, ALL RIGHT?

- GUY WITH THE FLY SWATTER. YOU GOT YOUR LITTLE UMBRELLA,

YOU GOT YOUR--YOUR-- YOUR RADIO OVER HERE.

YOU'RE ON SPRING BREAK, RIGHT?

- I'M-A DO MY COOL THING, MAN, YOU DO YOUR GREASE MONKEY THING,

- ALL RIGHT? - YOU WORK HER WELL.

- IT LOOKS GOOD. - THE LADIES LIKE ME.

- UH-HUH. - SPEAKING OF--

THAT'S ME. YOU DO YOU, I DO ME.

- HOPE SHE LIKES, UH, FLY SWATTERS.

- HEY, HEY, RENEE. WHAT'S UP, BABY? GIVE ME A KISS.

- NOW, NOW, NOW, DON'T HEY ME. - WHAT?

- I THOUGHT YOU OWNED THIS PLACE?

- WELL, UM, I DO, I DO.

- I FOUND OUT FROM KEISHA THAT YOU JUST PUMP THE GAS.

WELCOME TO MY STATION.

HOW CAN I HELP YOU TODAY, BEAUTIFUL?

- I NEED DIRECTIONS TO MANHATTAN,

CAN YOU PLEASE GIVE THEM TO ME? I'M IN A RUSH.

- AH, NEW YORK CITY AIN'T GOING NOWHERE.

- AH, THIS IS YOUR STATION?

- MM-HM. - YOU'RE PHIL?

- YEAH, I MEAN, DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE NAME TAG.

- YOU ARE A GAS ATTENDANT. - WELL, THAT IS TRUE.

- AND THE ONLY THING YOU OWN IS THAT SILLY LITTLE BIKE OVER THERE

AND THAT SILLY LITTLE BIKE ISN'T EVEN THE COLLECTOR'S ITEM

- YOU SAY IT IS. - OH, NOW, THAT'S A LIE.

- IT'S A HUFFY! - WELL, YES, IT IS A HUFFY,

BUT IT IS A 1990 HUFFY, DISCONTINUED MODEL.

THEREFORE, BY DEFINITION, A COLLECTOR'S ITEM.

- DON'T LIE. HEY, YOU?

- AAAH!

- CAN YOU COME OVER HERE FOR A SECOND?

- WHY PEOPLE ALWAYS GONNA RUN TO THE WHITE GUY?

- CAN I AKS YOU A QUESTION? - YEAH, YOU JUST DID.

- DOES HE OWN THIS PLACE? - HE OWNS THAT HUFFY.

- IS HIS REAL NAME PHIL? - IT SAYS COOL ON HIS NAME TAG.

- YOU'RE IN THE MIDDLE. - HEY--

YO, WHAT WAS THAT? - YUP.

- LOOK AROUND YOU, MAN, WE WORK AT A GAS STATION.

- MM-HM. - YOU FIX CARS, I PUMP GAS.

I CAN BARELY KEEP MY FINGERNAILS CLEAN.

- THERE'S SOME SPECIAL SOAP IN THE BACK IF YOU--

- IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT FOR YOURSELF?

- LOOK, I HAPPEN TO LIKE MY LIFE.

- YEAH, WELL, WHATEVER WORKS FOR YOU.

- YEAH, WHATEVER WORKS FOR YOU, TOO.

- WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU BOOKED SOMETHING?

- WHATEVER, MAN, I'VE DONE COMMERCIALS.

TODAY'S ORDINARY BURGER JUST CAN'T SATISFY

THE MODERN-DAY BLACK MAN.

WE LIKES OUR FOOD TO HAVE THAT EXTRA LARGE FLAVOR, BABY.

THAT'S WHY, HERE AT BURGER JESTER,

WE HAVE A COMMITMENT TO BEEF.

WITH THE INTRODUCTION OF THE NEW BIG DADDY BURGER, BABY.

THIS RIGHT HERE AIN'T YOUR DADDY'S BURGER, BABY.

- HEY BIG, DADDY. - HEY, SUGAR,

WHY DON'T YOU PLANT ONE ON ME?

- Woman: THIS IS BIG, DADDY.

- Man: KEEP IT REAL. WHEN YOU EAT YOUR MEAL.

BURGER JESTER, 77 BURGER LANE, SOUTH ORANGE, NEW JERSEY,

WWW.BIGDADDYBURGER.COM. AVAILABLE NOW!

- I'M OUT! COVER ME, HOMEBOY. - HOMEBOY?

- ALL RIGHT, DAWG, BROTHER, PLAYA.

- NOW, YOU KNOW YOU AIN'T SUPPOSED TO BE DOING THAT.

- YOU KNOW, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE AT 10 AM.

YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T OWN THIS PLACE?

YOU KNOW YOU SIT OVER THERE WITH YOUR MUSIC

AND YOUR--

- ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, YOU SOUND LIKE MY WIFE, MAN.

- HEY, GET A GIRLFRIEND FIRST.

YOU'RE IN THE MIDDLE.

- LEARN HOW TO DRIVE.

WATCH IT, LOSER. I'M WORKING HERE.

BABY, BABY, WE ARE CLOSED.

DAMN, UP TO THE LAST TICK ON THE CLOCK.

CHARLI?

- REGGIE?

- WHAT--WHAT ARE YOU DOING-- - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

DO YOU WORK HERE? - SAY WHAT?

- DO YOU WORK HERE? - HERE?

- UH-- - YEAH?

- WELL, I MEAN TECHNICALLY, NOT REALLY,

I MEAN, I'M STILL ACTING, JUST-- JUST PAYING OFF SOME BILLS,

THIS, JUST DOING THIS AS YOU KNOW, A FAVOR TO MY MAN.

PART TIME, THAT'S ALL.

- UNIFORM AND ALL? - YEAH, YEAH. YEAH.

HE LIKES EVERYTHING TO BE OFFICIAL.

IMAGE IS EVERYTHING, YOU KNOW.

- FILL ME UP PLEASE, UNLEADED.

ENJOY THIS NOW, LADY, 'CAUSE IT'S NOT EVERY DAY

THAT A WOMAN GETS HER GAS PUMPED BY SUCH TALENTED HANDS.

- HERE. - NO, NO, NO, LET ME GET THAT. LET ME GET THAT.

- DON'T GO BREAKING YOUR PIGGY BANK FOR ME, PLEASE.

TAKE IT

AND KEEP THE CHANGE.

- LOOK, WHY DON'T-- WHY DON'T WE START AGAIN?

YOU WERE EMPTY, I WAS HERE.

COME ON, WHAT ARE THE CHANCES OF THAT?

- 100%.

THE CHANCES OF PULLING INTO A GAS STATION

WHEN YOU NEED GAS ARE 100%.

- OUT OF ALL THE GAS STATIONS IN ALL THE WORLD,

YOU HAPPEN TO PULL INTO THIS PARTICULAR ONE,

WHERE I HELP OUT EVERY NOW AND AGAIN.

YOU'RE JUST GONNA ACT LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW ME, HUH?

- I'M ACTING LIKE THIS BECAUSE I DO KNOW YOU.

THANK YOU.

- JUST--OK, JUST--JUST--BREATHE.

- HE JUST, HE HIT ME AND HE JUST--

AND HE JUST-- - YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. JUST--

LOOK AT THIS.

OH, MY GOD.

- YOU PROBABLY WANNA LEAVE IT HERE.

- LITTLE EVEL KNIEVEL ACTION GOING ON.

WHY ARE YOU BACK, CHARLI? - WHAT?

- WHAT BRINGS YOU BACK INTO TOWN?

- I'M GETTING MARRIED ON SATURDAY.

MY FIANCE AND I, WE MOVED BACK LAST WEEKEND.

- SATURDAY? TODAY'S--TODAY'S-- TODAY'S THURSDAY.

- YEAH. - WOW, I MEAN--

- I HAVE TO GET HOME. - HEY, WAIT.

- WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - YOU'LL SEE.

- NO, NO, NO, NO, REGGIE. REGGIE, THAT'S NOT--

THAT'S NOT NECESSARY. IT'S FINE.

I CAN JUST WALK BY MYSELF. IT'S FINE.

- YOU COULD WALK BUT YOU WILL NOT WALK.

I'M A GENTLEMAN, I CAN'T--I CAN'T LET YOU DO IT.

YOUR CHARIOT AWAITS.

- YOU DON'T WANNA DO THIS.

- I DO. - I DON'T.

OH!

- WHAT, WHAT, WHAT, WHAT'S GOING ON?

- KEYS ARE IN THE CAR. - OH, WELL, YOU KNOW,

WE CAN GO BACK AND GET THEM OR I CAN JUST WAIT HERE WITH YOU,

WHATEVER YOU WANNA DO. - YOU GO GET 'EM.

- ME GO GET 'EM?

COME ON, AND LEAVE YOU HERE ALL ALONE?

I WOULD NEVER DO THAT. I'M TOO MUCH OF A GENTLEMAN.

IT WOULDN'T BE THE FIRST TIME.

IT'S A NICE LITTLE SETUP YOU GOT HERE.

TREES, BUSHES ALL MANICURED. IT'S A GOOD LOOK FOR YOU.

CHARLI, I'M ONLY WORKING THERE

JUST TO PAY OFF MY TUITION BILLS WHILE I ACT, OK?

THAT'S ALL, JUST MAKING SOME MOVES.

GIVE A BROTHER SOME CREDIT. - IT DOESN'T MATTER.

- HEY, BABY, WILL YOU COME HELP ME

WITH SOME OF THIS STUFF?

UH-- - Charli: Hi.

- Charli: HI. - Man: HEY.

MM-MM-MM!

WHAT'S UP, MAN? WHO'S THIS?

- OH. BABE, I HAD A LITTLE ACCIDENT AT THE GAS STATION.

- ACCIDENT? ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

- YEAH, I'M--I'M ALL RIGHT. HE WALKED ME HOME.

- ALL RIGHT, ED MARSHALL.

CHARLI'S FIANCE.

HUSBAND, COME SATURDAY.

LISTEN, I'LL HANDLE ANY LEGAL RECOURSE. I SPECIALIZE IN--

- IT WAS A HIT AND RUN, BABY. - A HIT AND RUN?

- YEAH, THEY TOOK OFF BEFORE I COULD EVEN GET OUT OF THE CAR.

- ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? - YOU SPECIALIZE IN DIVORCE?

- YEAH, THAT AND OTHER ASPECTS OF THE LAW.

I PASSED THE BAR IN SEVEN STATES.

- AH. - YEAH.

- UH, LOOK , MAN, I DON'T WANT YOUR CARD.

- OH, YOU'RE ABOVE THE LAW?

- I'M JUST NOT A CRIMINAL, MAN. - HA, HA.

I DIDN'T SAY YOU WERE A CRIMINAL. GOT YOU.

LISTEN, LISTEN, SOONER OR LATER, EVERYONE GETS CAUGHT

DOING SOMETHING, ALL RIGHT?

- THAT'S WHEN I COME IN. - OH? WOW.

THAT'S--THAT'S SCARY.

- YEAH, IT WAS A PLEASURE MEETING YOU

AND I WANNA THANK YOU, FOR LOOKING AFTER

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE.

NOW, YOU KEEP DOING YOUR GOOD WORKS.

GOOD SAMARITAN, HUH!

SAMARITAN NEGRO. COME ON.

- ARE YOU OK, BABY? - I'M REALLY OK.

- REALLY? - YEAH.

- COME ON. - NO.

- WE NEED TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL? - NO. NO, NO.

- HEY, HEY. - MM.

- WHAT'S UP, MOMMA?

- AHEM. - OH, YEAH, THE HAT.

- HELLO, MOTHER. - WHAT'S WRONG, BABY?

- NOTHING. - AUDITIONS?

HEY, HEY, BROTHER.

- DID MY AGENT CALL? - NO.

CHECK YOUR FAX MACHINE, THOUGH.

- YOU LOCK EVERYTHING UP TIGHT? - YEP.

- AAAH!

OH, YEAH! - THANK YOU.

- MOVE OVER, JUNIOR.

- MA, WHAT'S--WHAT'S ALL THE FOOD FOR?

- SATURDAY'S EVENT. - WHAT'S THE EVENT?

- A WEDDING. - A WEDDING?

YOU KNOW, A BRIDE, A GROOM, A CAKE,

BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, MY FOOD.

- PLEASE DO NOT TELL ME THAT YOU ARE CATERING CHARLI'S WEDDING.

- NOW I THINK YOU WILL WANNA DIP THAT IN THE SAUCE.

- WHY ARE YOU AVOIDING THE QUESTION?

- WHAT QUESTION? - IS IT CHARLI'S WEDDING?

- HUH? - CHARLI, TALL PRETTY GIRL,

LOVE OF MY LIFE?

- IT'S HER WEDDING.

- WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME? - WHY SHOULD I TELL YOU

WHAT YOUR EX-FIANCEE DOES?

YOU MESSED THAT ONE UP FOR YOURSELF, BUBBA.

- MAYBE I SHOULD GET A LITTLE BIT MORE ICE. - AHEM!

- WELL, YOU DON'T KNOW THE WHOLE STORY.

- WELL, I DON'T NEED TO KNOW IT.

YOU CANNOT TREAT REAL PEOPLE

LIKE THEY'RE CHARACTERS IN A SCRIPT

AND THEN EXPECT A FAIRY-TALE ENDING.

- THERE'S ONE MORE THING. - OH YEAH, WHAT'S THAT?

- I'M EXPANDING MY BUSINESS. GOING REGIONAL NEXT MONTH.

- WELL, HEY, THAT'S GOOD NEWS.

- YEAH, I'LL HAVE A LARGER KITCHEN,

I'M GONNA BE WORKING FROM HOME.

- WELL, YOU ALREADY WORK FROM HOME.

- WH--WHAT? - WE'RE MOVING.

- TWO HOURS AWAY. - I DON'T KNOW IF YOU REMEMBER,

BUT I GO BACK AND FORTH FROM THE HOUSE TO THE CITY

TO GO TO AUDITIONS, HAVE YOU EVEN CONSIDERED THAT?

- DID YOU EVEN CONSIDER THAT I HAVE BEEN COOKING MEALS

FOR 200 PEOPLE ON A 4-EYE STOVE

EVER SINCE YOUR FATHER AND I DIVORCED?

- WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?

- LOOK, HONEY, BABY, THIS IS OUR PLACE.

PHIL AND I WANT A PLACE FOR OURSELVES.

SO WE CAN START BUILDING SOME NEW MEMORIES.

- YEAH.

YEAH, O-HO! YOU ALMOST GOT ME, MAN, YOU'RE A FUNNY DUDE.

THIS IS-- THIS IS A JOKE, RIGHT?

THIS IS A JOKE, YOU--YOU--YOU-- I WAS LATE TO WORK TODAY, MOM,

THAT'S WHY, 'CAUSE I WAS LATE TO WORK,

YOU'RE TRYING TO TEACH ME A LESSON,

WELL THE LESSON'S LEARNT, MAN, I'M A CHANGED MAN.

I WILL BE ON TIME, JACK, RIGHT ON THE DOT.

EVERY DAY. I'M A CHANGED MAN, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN--

GUARANTEE THAT, YOU'VE GOT MY WORD,

SCOUT'S HONOR, PINKY SWEAR, BET ON BLACK.

YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, THAT HOME BLACK, I SAW THAT ON--

ON SOUL TRAIN.

YOU GUYS-- YOU GUYS ARE SERIOUS.

- YOU EVER THINK ABOUT, UH-- GETTING YOUR OWN PLACE?

- MA? - YOU NEED TO BE NEAR THE CITY AND WE DON'T.

MAYBE YOU OUGHT TO THINK ABOUT GETTING A PLACE CLOSER.

- YEAH.

- THIS IS NOT THE NIGHT TO HEAR THIS.

- BABY, THERE'S JUST NO PERFECT TIME FOR SOME THINGS.

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE JUST GOT TO DO WHAT YOU'VE GOT TO DO.

SOMETIMES-- - SOMETIMES SEEMS LIKE EVERY TIME FOR ME.

- EXCUSE ME. - WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

- APARTMENT HUNTING.

- HE'S JUST HARD-HEADED, YOU KNOW, LIKE I USED TO BE.

- MM-HM, I KNOW YOU'RE HARD HEADED,

BUT I THOUGHT BONES WERE SUPPOSED TO GET SOFTER

AS YOU GOT OLDER.

NOW THAT'S FUNNY.

YOU KNOW, BABY, MY BONES ARE GOOD.

- AAAH! - COME HERE.

- HI.

- OH. - MM.

MM.

WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE REHEARSAL?

- IF THE WEDDING GOES AS SMOOTH AS THE REHEARSAL

I'LL BE MORE THAN HAPPY.

I'M A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT THE FLORAL ARRANGEMENTS, THOUGH.

I MIGHT CHECK THAT OUT TOMORROW.

- WHAT'S UP WITH THAT? - I DON'T KNOW,

I'M JUST UNSURE AND I DIDN'T WANNA SETTLE.

- SETTLE?

MY WIFE WILL NEVER HAVE TO SETTLE ABOUT ANYTHING.

- FUTURE WIFE. - YES, YES, YES, YES.

FUTURE WIFE. NOW DIDN'T THE BROCHURE GUARANTEE

100% CUSTOMER SATISFACTION? - YES.

- YES, IT DID, SO NOW, IF THEY DIDN'T PROVIDE THAT, THEN--

- OH, GOD, JOHNNIE COCHRAN, WAIT A SECOND.

- WHAT? - SLOW DOWN.

WHAT DID I SAY?

- YOU SAID YOU'D HANDLE IT TOMORROW.

- AND WHAT AM I GONNA DO?

- YOU'RE GONNA HANDLE IT TOMORROW.

- OK, GOOD. - THE DEFENSE RESTS.

- VERY GOOD. - WHAT?

- YOU SMELL LIKE GARLIC, IT'S AWFUL.

- GARLIC? - YEAH.

- GARLIC IS THE FLAVOR OF LOVE, YOU AIN'T KNOW?

- SAYS WHO?

- SAYS THE MAN WHO LOVES YOU DEARLY.

- OH, GOD, NO, YOU SMELL LIKE GARLIC.

THAT'S AWFUL. - COME HERE, COME HERE, COME HERE.

- OH! NO, DON'T TICKLE, DON'T TICKLE.

- I'M TICKLING!

- Charli: AAAH, THE FOOD! - OH! OW!

- MY MASTERPIECE. I GOT IT, I GOT IT.

IT'S OK. - GOD!

- IT'S OK. OK.

IT'S STILL OK, BABY. - GOOD.

- WHOO! OK.

- ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

- YOU'RE NOT THE FIRST GUY THAT'S TICKLED ME, YOU KNOW?

- YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT AFTER THE ACCIDENT?

- OH? YEAH, IT WAS NOTHING,

IT WAS NOTHING, HONESTLY.

- NOTHING? BABY, YOU WERE INVOLVED

IN A HIT AND RUN.

- I KNOW, HE'LL TRACK THEM DOWN.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

- HOW YOU GONNA MARRY THIS DUDE OVER ME?

- SH. WE HAVEN'T SPOKEN IN OVER THREE YEARS.

YOU DON'T GET TO ASK WHY. - WHY NOT?

- BECAUSE YOU DON'T. - WHY IS THAT?

- YOU JUST DON'T, OK?

- IN CASE YOU FORGOT, CHARLI, YOU'RE THE ONE THAT BROKE UP WITH ME.

THAT'S WHY WE HAVEN'T SPOKEN IN, LIKE, OVER THREE YEARS.

- IF YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN THERE FOR ME

WE'D BE HAVING A DIFFERENT CONVERSATION RIGHT NOW,

BUT YOU WEREN'T.

I JUST WANNA TALK, IT'S TOO LATE TO EVEN DO THAT?

- TOO LATE.

I QUESTION YOUR SANITY SOMETIMES, YOU KNOW THAT?

- YEAH, WELL, MY STRAITJACKET'S ON THE BACK OF THE BIKE.

- HUH! REALLY FUNNY.

- ED? HEY, BIG GUY, WHAT'S GOING ON, MAN?

- WHAT'S UP? - UM--

WOULD YOU BELIEVE, I MANAGED TO GET THE PLATES

ON THOSE KIDS AFTER ALL?

I SAW THEM ON MY WAY HOME FROM WORK,

FOLLOWED THEM FOR, LIKE, 2 MILES.

- WOW, ON THAT BIKE?

- YEAH. IT'S GOT TEN SPEEDS. - OH.

- WELL, YOUR CARD CAME IN HANDY AFTER ALL.

- UM, THANKS, BUT YOU KNOW,

THIS COULD HAVE WAITED TILL THE MORNING, MAN, IT'S 11 O'CLOCK, YOU KNOW?

- YEAH. - YEAH, WELL, THIS IS, UH, IT'S KINDA URGENT.

- AND WELL, WE WERE JUST ABOUT TO HAVE DINNER

SO IF YOU DON'T MIND-- - NO, I--I DON'T MIND,

ACTUALLY I'M-- I AM A LITTLE BIT THIRSTY

AFTER THE WHOLE BIKE ORDEAL.

WOULDN'T MIND A LITTLE SIP OF SOMETHING.

I COULD HOLD YOU FOR NEGLIGENCE, IF YOU DON'T, YOU KNOW THAT.

- HEY. - ALL RIGHT?

- ALL RIGHT, COME ON, MAN. COME ON. I'LL GET YOU SOMETHING.

- THANK YOU. - COME ON. ALL RIGHT?

- OH, YEAH. EXCUSE ME.

- SO LET ME, UH-- PUT SOME PANTS ON, RIGHT?

WHAT?

Ed: BAM!

- IS THAT UM, THAT'S TAKEOUT?

- OH, COME ON, ALL HOME-MADE, STRICTLY FRESH,

AIN'T THAT RIGHT, CHARLI? - YES.

- THAT'S RIGHT. - I CAN TELL THIS IS PROBABLY PRETTY GOOD,

YOU KNOW, I KNOW A LITTLE THING OR TWO ABOUT FINE CUISINE.

FIRST OF ALL, BECAUSE I LOVE TO EAT

AND SECONDLY, BECAUSE MY MOTHER IS A CATERER.

- FINE CUISINE. LIKE IT.

- YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU SHOULD HAVE HER CATER YOUR WEDDING.

- NO, WELL, THAT'S HER DEPARTMENT, YOU KNOW,

WE ALREADY GOT SOMEBODY, RIGHT, BABY?

- YEAH, YEAH, WE DO. - HMM, THAT'S TOO BAD.

AH, LET'S EAT.

- YOUR NAILS ARE HORRENDOUS. - THANK YOU.

YOU MUST BE ONE HELL OF AN ATTORNEY, ED.

TO GET HER HAND IN MARRIAGE. WHAT'D YOU DO, SUE HER FOR IT?

YEAH. THAT'S A TOUGH HAND TO KEEP, BROTHER,

THAT'S A TOUGH HAND TO KEEP.

- DO YOU TWO KNOW EACH OTHER?

- OH, YEAH, NO DOUBT. NO DOUBT, MAN.

- WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?

- SHE--SHE DIDN'T TELL YOU? - I WAS GONNA TELL YOU

BUT THE DOOR RANG AND-- - WHAT WERE YOU GONNA SAY?

- THE TRUTH. - I DOUBT THAT.

- WHAT IS THE TRUTH? - Charli: NOTHING.

- AAH. WELL, NOW, THE TRUTH--

- NOTHING SPECIAL, TRUST ME. - LET ME TELL THE BROTHER

THE TRUTH, HE WANTS TO KNOW THE TRUTH.

THE TRUTH IS, THAT, YOU KNOW, AT ONE POINT IN TIME

CHARLI WAS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN MY LIFE, MAN.

WHEN WE WERE KIDS GROWING UP. THEN YOU KNOW,

AS FRIENDS DO, WE DRIFTED APART

THINGS HAPPEN, LIFE CHANGES, BLASE, BLAH.

- I HAD THIS FRIEND, DARLENE, BEAUTIFUL GIRL, SHE WAS GREAT,

SHE MOVED AWAY, I WAS YOUNG. - Cool: SHE WAS HOT?

- SHE WAS FINE.

NOW BABY, I JUST HAD A MOMENT,

CAN'T A BROTHER HAVE A MOMENT? YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.

- Cool: I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN THOUGH, MAN, 'CAUSE CHARLI--

WHOO-HOO! - COME ON, CHARLI IS THE BEST.

- Cool: CHARLI, CHARLI, CHARLI.

CHARLI'S SOMETHING ELSE, MAN.

- WHAT?

WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?

- WELL, LISTEN, IF I HAD ONE NEGATIVE THING

TO SAY ABOUT CHARLI, THIS HAS JUST POPPED INTO MY HEAD NOW.

IS THAT, YOU KNOW, AS MUCH AS SHE LIKES

TO FACE PROBLEMS HEAD-ON,

SHE TENDS TO SKIRT THE ISSUE WHEN IT COMES TO THE BIG PROBLEMS.

- AND YOU'RE THE-- YOU'RE THE MOST QUALIFIED PERSON

TO TALK ABOUT THAT?

- BABY, OK, I WILL SAY ONE THING.

THAT, SOMETIMES--RIGHT?

WELL, WE KNOW YOU'RE A GREAT PSYCHOLOGIST, RIGHT,

THAT'S IN NO DISPUTE.

BUT SOMETIMES YOU DON'T ALWAYS APPLY YOUR OWN ANALYSIS

TO YOURSELF.

- AND YOU'RE THE MOST QUALIFIED PERSON TO TALK ABOUT THAT?

- IT'S TRUE, IT'S TRUE. - HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

- HEY! - COME ON, MAN, NOW.

- HEY, HOW ABOUT--HOW ABOUT THAT ONE GUY YOU WERE ENGAGED TO?

WHAT WAS HIS NAME, UH, REGINALD, I BELIEVE?

- Charli: WHAT ABOUT HIM?

- THE BULLSHIT ACTOR DUDE.

- HE'S A LOSER. - A--A LOSER?

WAS HE THAT BAD?

- WELL, FROM WHAT I HEAR. - YOU KNOW WHAT,

I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER ANYMORE.

- MMM, I DON'T KNOW, CHARLI,

YOU CALLED IT OFF WITH HIM ABOUT A MONTH BEFORE THE WEDDING, RIGHT?

HE WAS TAKING YOU HOME FROM SCHOOL AND BY THE TIME

HE GOT TO THE END OF THE DRIVEWAY, EVERYTHING WAS OVER.

THE MARRIAGE, THE WEDDING, THE RELATIONSHIP, EVERYTHING.

WHAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE BEGINNING BECAME THE END.

CAUSE THAT'S WHAT THEY HAD TOLD ME AT THE GAS STATION.

- WELL, YOU KNOW, IT WAS THE END OF THE ROAD.

- THAT'S RIGHT. AND THE START OF ANOTHER.

- YES. - COME HERE, YOU.

- MMM. MM!

- THAT'S SOME BULLSHIT, CHARLI.

I MEAN, I'M SORRY, BUT IT IS.

IT'S SOME BULLSHIT. YOU DON'T DO THAT TO PEOPLE.

SORRY, MAN, BUT I'M JUST NOT IN THE BUSINESS

OF SUGAR-COATING THE TRUTH.

- NO, NO, YOU'RE IN THE BUSINESS OF--OF WHAT?

IGNORING THE TRUTH.

- WELL I'M IN THE BUSINESS OF TRYING TO START THE DINNER.

YOU KNOW CAN WE, CAN WE, ASK A BLESSING OR SOMETHING?

- YES. - YOU KNOW, JUST WHATEVER WE NEED TO DO, LET'S GET TO EAT.

- HOW ABOUT BLESSING THE FACT THAT IS TWO BLACK PEOPLE IN LOVE.

BLACK LOVE, I LOVE IT, IT JUST WARMS MY HEART.

- ALL RIGHT, WELL, TO LOVE.

- TO CHARLI.

- AND TO YOU. - AND TO YOU.

- HEY, WHY NOT?

- MY BROTHER THAT SMELLS LIKE GASOLINE

CAN STILL DRAWING BOARD ME.

- HEY, CHECK IT OUT, I'M GONNA SKEDADDLE, MAN, YOU KNOW.

- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? UH-UH.

- YOU HAVEN'T EVEN EATEN. - NAH,

- I GOTTA PEDDLE MY WAY HOME. - Ed: NO.

- BABY, IF HE HAS TO GO, HE HAS THINGS TO DO,

WE HAVE TO GO TO BED, WE HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO DO TOMORROW.

- IT'S DAYS BEFORE THE WEDDING. - IT'S FINE, YEAH, SURE,

IF YOU'VE GOTTA GO, BRO, I UNDERSTAND. - ALL RIGHT, THANKS, MAN.

HEY, DO ME A FAVOR, MAN. - WHAT'S THAT?

- TAKE CARE OF THIS PRECIOUS WOMAN.

- OH, I CERTAINLY WILL. SHE IS MY BEST FRIEND.

- ALWAYS A PLEASURE.

- I'LL SHOW YOU OUT. - ALL RIGHT, MAN.

I HATE YOU SOMETIMES, MAN.

♪ CAN'T NOBODY LOVE YOU LIKE I'M LOVING YOU, BABY ♪

♪ 'CAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU LIKE I DO ♪

♪ AND--

- BUBBA, WAKE UP, COME ON NOW.

- YOU'VE BEEN WAKING UP TO THIS SONG FOR THREE YEARS NOW.

WHERE'D YOU GO LAST NIGHT?

I'D TELL YOU NOT TO DO IT BUT I KNOW WHO I'M TALKING TO.

- HEY? - MMM?

- TREAT MY CLIENT WITH SOME RESPECT?

BUBBA! - HEY, HEY, I'M UP.

I'M UP. I'M GOING TO WORK.

- I LOVE YOU, SON. - I LOVE YOU TOO.

YEAH. YOU LOVE ME SO MUCH, YOU KICK ME UP OUT THE HOUSE.

I DON'T NEED THAT LOVE.

YOU'RE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN IN THE WORLD, YOU KNOW THAT?

I LOVE YOUR LIPS, YOUR EYES, YOUR EARS.

- GOOD MORNING. - GOOD MORNING.

- IS THE CAR READY YET? - UH, YEAH.

MY BOY OVER AT STAN'S

HOOKED THE DOOR UP FOR ME FROM A JUNK YARD.

- $500 JOB. - $500?

- IT'S COMPLICATED STUFF. - WHEN'S IT GETTING PICKED UP?

- UH, THIS ATTORNEY CALLED ME ABOUT IT THIS MORNING.

MADE A POINT OF TELLING ME HE PRACTICED LAW.

- BETTER MAKE IT 600. - YEAH.

I'M GONNA GET BREAKFAST, YOU GOOD?

- NO, I'M STRAIGHT, MAN, THANKS. - ALL RIGHT.

- I'LL CATCH YOU LATER. - MM-HM.

- DON'T TOUCH THE CAR, RIGHT? - THAT'S YOUR JOB.

- YEAH, YOU KNOW.

- COOL, WHAT YOU DOING? WH--WHAT YOU DOING?

GET OUT THE CAR. YOU KNOW, YOU WORK,

YOU CAN HAVE A CAR LIKE THAT YOU CAN SIT IN ALL DAY LONG.

- YOU'RE TIRED? - NO, I WAS JUST--

- GET OUT THE CAR.

- Cool: FILL HER UP?

- Customer: NO, NO. $5, REGULAR.

- WHAT'S UP? HOW YOU DOING? - I'M ALL RIGHT, HOW YOU DOING?

- I'M CHILLING.

- UH, YOU DID SOME GREAT WORK ON THE CAR, DUDE.

- YEAH? - YEAH.

I GOT NO MONEY FOR GAS THOUGH, YOUR WORK WAS EXPENSIVE.

- I HOOKED YOU UP, NEW SHOCKS, I GAVE YOU--

YOUR BRAKES WERE KIND OF STICKING. I GAVE YOU SOME--

- YEAH, GOOD, HOW YOU DOING? - YEAH, I'M PRETTY GOOD.

- YOUR GIRL GOOD? - YEAH.

- TELL HER I SAID HEY. - I WILL.

- SHE'S CUTE, MAN. - YEAH.

- YOU GUYS LOOK GOOD TOGETHER.

- ALL RIGHT. - Customer: IT'S ALL THERE.

- Cool: 16.59?

- IT'S $5. - YOU SAID FILL HER UP. IT'S 16.59.

- I DIDN'T SAY FILL HER UP.

- YEAH, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID, MAN.

- I DIDN'T SAY FILL IT UP.

- I WOULDN'T HAVE FILLED YOUR TANK IF YOU DIDN'T SAY FILL HER UP.

- YEAH, YOU TAKE IT BACK OUT, THEN. I SAID $5.

- WHY WOULD I FILL IT UP IF YOU DIDN'T SAY THAT?

- YEAH, WHY YOU FILL IT UP IF I DIDN'T SAY THAT?

- 'CAUSE YOU SAID-- - I AIN'T SAY THAT.

- YOU SAID THAT, MAN. - YO, YO, YO.

- THIS GUY CRAZY, THIS GUY CRAZY.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, I GOT YOU.

YOU JUST TELL YOUR FRIENDS WHERE TO COME

TO GET THEIR CAR SMOOTHED OUT, ALL RIGHT? - I'LL TELL 'EM.

TAKE IT EASY, MAN, GOOD TO SEE YOU.

- ALL RIGHT, MAN.

- HEY, MAN, I NEED YOU TO COVER FOR ME AGAIN.

- ALL I DO IS COVER FOR YOU, NO. - COME ON, MAN, I COVER FOR YOU TOO.

LOOK, WHAT DO YOU THINK PHIL WILL BE MORE UPSET ABOUT,

ME COMING IN LATE, OR YOU OVERCHARGING CUSTOMERS

FOR THE CARS YOU JOYRIDE IN?

ONE'S ILLEGAL, ONE'S NOT. - I GOT MY REASONS.

- YOU HAVE REASONS FOR OVERCHARGING YOUR CUSTOMERS?

- YEAH.

- WHAT ARE THESE REASONS, MAN? WHAT DO YOU NEED MONEY FOR?

- WHAT? WHAT THE HELL'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

- I'M WORKING ON SOMETHING. - WHAT?

WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON?

- WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK?

- I'LL BE IN AND OUT ALL DAY. - NO, MAN, YOU WORK UNTIL WE CLOSE.

LISTEN, I WILL COVER YOU FOR AN HOUR.

- NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. I NEED MORE TIME THAN THAT.

- WELL, NO. - PLEASE, LISTEN.

YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO KNOW WHO THE REAL COOL IS, RIGHT?

- THAT WAS YESTERDAY, TODAY, I'M ALL RIGHT.

- YOU KNOW WHOSE CAR THAT IS IN THE GARAGE?

- WHICH ONE? - THE ONLY CAR IN THE GARAGE, STUPID, THE ACCORD.

- I'LL KNOW WHEN THEY BRING IT BACK IN FOR MORE WORK.

- IT'S CHARLI'S. - CHARLI REYNOLDS?

- CHARLI FROM HIGH SCHOOL? - YEAH, COLLEGE TOO.

- CHARLI, YOUR EX-FIANCEE. - YES, YES.

THAT ATTORNEY THAT YOU SPOKE TO EARLIER TODAY,

COME THE END OF THE DAY ON SATURDAY,

HER NEW HUSBAND.

- DAMN, THAT'S TOMORROW. - I KNOW THIS.

- BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. WAIT.

SO YOU WANT ME TO WORK FOR YOU SO YOU CAN GO OUT

AND LIVE SOME LOVE FANTASY YOU'VE GOT PLANNED IN YOUR HEAD?

LOOK AROUND YOU, BRO, THIS AIN'T-- THERE AIN'T NO BRIDGES HERE.

THIS AIN'T MADISON COUNTY. THIS IS ESSEX COUNTY, BRO.

- STOP CALLING ME BRO, HOMEBOY AND ALL THAT OTHER STUFF.

MAN, I'M GETTING TIRED OF IT.

- YOU STILL LOVE HER?

LISTEN, MAN, REGARDLESS, I AIN'T WORKING FOR YOU ALL DAY.

I'M SORRY, DAWG, THAT'S OUTLANDISH,

- THAT'S PREPOSTEROUS. - WHAT?

COME ON, MAN, I GOT SOME AUDITIONS I GOTTA GO TO TOO.

- THERE COMES A TIME IN EVERY MAN'S LIFE

WHEN HE HAS TO PUT HIS FOOT DOWN.

THIS IS THAT TIME, I AM THAT MAN.

SORRY.

- I'LL TELL PHIL RIGHT NOW THAT YOU GREASE THE CUSTOMERS.

- RIGHT NOW. - I TOLD YOU, MAN,

- I GOT MY REASONS. - WHAT ARE THESE REASONS?

- JUST-- GIVE ME THE DAMN BANK.

- MY MAN, YES, A LITTLE ADVANCE ON MY PAYCHECK.

PHIL SAID IT WAS COOL AND IT CAN ALL GO TO YOU--

- ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

- IF YOU JUST HOLD ME DOWN. - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

- THANKS A LOT, MAN. GOD BLESS.

COME ON, LET ME SEE MY BALANCE.

80 BUCKS.

WHAT? MAN!

I KNOW I PUT A CHECK-- DAMN!

WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! HOLD UP. DAMN!

AAH!

- REGINALD COOLIDGE.

REGINALD COOLIDGE?

OK, WE NOW HAVE REGINALD COOLIDGE.

- HEY, HOW YOU DOING? - HI.

- ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU. LEAVE THAT THERE, PLEASE.

- OK, SIT DOWN.

- UM, WE DECIDED TO CALL YOU IN AFTER LOOKING AT YOUR REEL.

HE WANTS AN UNKNOWN AND YOU ARE THAT.

I MEAN, I DON'T REMEMBER SEEING YOU IN ANYTHING.

- UH, THANK YOU.

- THANK ME? FOR WHAT?

- YOU KNOW, FOR HAVING ME IN DESPITE MY UNKNOWNNESS.

- YOU'RE WELCOME. GO AHEAD.

- MR. BIG DADDY BURGER.

- HEY, IT AIN'T YOUR DADDY'S BURGER.

YOU KNOW, BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY.

I'M THE SPOKESPERSON FOR THEIR CAMPAIGN.

- THAT'S WHAT IT IS, I KNEW I KNOW YOU FROM SOMEWHERE.

- YOU KNOW, "HEY, BIG DADDY." - YEAH.

- DO YOU REMEMBER THAT? - YEAH.

I WAS ACTUALLY, UM, THE FEMALE LEAD IN THE COMMERCIAL

WITH HIM, BUT, UH--HE S GOOD.

- YOU ACT? - WELL, I DID,

IT WAS A WHILE AGO. - EXCUSE ME.

- ANYWAY, I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH YOU KNOW ABOUT WHAT WE'RE DOING,

BUT WE'RE NOT GONNA BURN ONE FRAME OF FILM

ON ANY OF THAT TYPICAL BLACK BULLSHIT THAT THEY'RE DOING.

- SO UH, WHAT IS IT ABOUT? - IT'S A COMEDY, A BLACK COMEDY.

ABOUT WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF BLACK PEOPLE

GOT REPARATIONS FOR SLAVERY.

- DOESN'T SOUND FUNNY TO ME AT ALL.

- AND THAT'S THE POINT.

OUR GOAL HERE IS TO KEEP DRUG DEALER

OFF THE TOP OF A LOT OF RESUMES.

HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED A DRUG DEALER?

- UH, YE--A STREET PHARMACIST.

- LOOK, LET ME PAINT THE PICTURE.

A FICTITIOUS TOWN IN VIRGINIA, NEW HOPE.

A BLACK TOWN, AND NOBODY HAS ANY REAL PROBLEMS.

THERE AREN'T ANY CLASS ISSUES AND EVERYTHING YOU NEED

IS AT THE GENERAL STORE.

NEW HOPE WAS FOUNDED DURING A RECONSTRUCTION.

ON LAND PURCHASED BY SEVERAL FAMILIES OF FREE MEN.

THESE FAMILIES HAPPEN TO BE DIRECT LINEAGE

TO THE ORIGINAL 23 SLAVES BROUGHT TO JAMESTOWN, VIRGINIA

IN THE YEAR 1619.

TODAY, THESE FAMILIES GET REPARATIONS CHECKS

OF A VERY SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT.

PROBLEM IS, THEY CAN'T TELL ANYBODY THAT THEY GOT 'EM

OR IT ALL FALLS APART.

- SO WHAT HAPPENS? - WHAT ABOUT US.

IT'S THE TITLE.

SO WHAT ABOUT YOU?

- SO YOU DON'T WANT ME TO READ THE LINES?

- JUST WANNA HEAR A LITTLE BIT ABOUT YOU.

- UH, MY STORY. HERE WE GO.

HWAAH!

HERE WE GO.

WELL, I AM 28 YEARS OLD, SIX FOOT ONE INCHES TALL.

AND I'M BLACK.

WHATEVER THE HELL THAT MEANS. UM, I LIVE AT HOME WITH MY MOM

AND HER BOYFRIEND WHO I WISH SHE NEVER HAD.

I GO ON AUDITIONS EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK.

IF I'M LUCKY.

IF I'M NOT AUDITIONING FOR A KILLER OR A RAPIST

OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT, I'M EVEN LUCKIER.

AH, DA-DA-DA-DA, DA-DA-DA-DA--

OH, UNTIL THIS MORNING, I RODE THE SAME BIKE

THAT I HAD ON MY PAPER ROUTE 17 YEARS AGO,

I RODE IT EVERY DAY.

THEN IT GOT STOLEN. THAT'S KIND WACK.

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I'M TELLING YOU THAT. UH--

LET'S SEE WHAT ELSE, I MEAN,

EVEN THOUGH THERE'S THE BIG STEREOTYPE AND EVERYTHING,

I'VE GOTTA ADMIT, I LOVE ME SOME CHICKEN,

FRIED CHICKEN, THAT'S MY FAVORITE.

IT TASTES SO GOOD. DON'T YOU AGREE?

UH, SOMETHING ELSE,

THAT, UH-- THAT PRETTY MUCH, UH-- SCENE.

- THAT'S IT?

- YEAH. YEAH, THAT'S IT, YEAH.

- YOU TOLD US HOW TALL YOU ARE, HOW OLD YOU ARE,

WHERE YOU LIVE,

YOU'RE BLACK, YOU'RE 28, YOU LIKE FRIED CHICKEN.

WHO ARE YOU?

UH--

CALL IN OUR NEXT ACTOR.

- YOU KNOW, THERE'S NO ONE ELSE OUT THERE. IT'S LUNCH TIME.

SO IF THERE'S SOMETHING YOU WANTED TO ADD MAYBE WE CAN--

- HE'S DONE, HE'S DONE. THE AUDITION IS OVER.

- WELL, I'M SORRY, WHAT DID I DO?

- YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING AT ALL. - Woman: YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LIKE?

ONE OF THOSE CUBAN SANDWICHES FROM DOWNSTAIRS.

- Man: I THOUGHT YOU GAVE UP THE PORK?

- Woman: OH, NO, NO, NO, NOT AT ALL.

- Man: WHERE'S LUNCH? - Young woman: I'LL CALL IT IN.

THE REGULAR, BIG DADDY BURGER? - Man: UH, YEAH, THANK YOU.

BIG DADDY BURGER PLEASE.

WHEN ACTORS LIKE THIS,

THEY COME IN HERE, NO PREPARATION--

- Young woman: YES, I'D LIKE TO MAKE AN ORDER.

- DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING, DON'T KNOW WHO THEY ARE.

- Young woman: ONE BIG DADDY BURGER.

- Woman: YEAH, I THINK WE SHOULD--

- Man: THE AUDITION'S OVER. - Woman: YEAH.

THANK YOU.

OK, FIRST OFF,

YOU CAN'T PULL A GUN ON A PERSON, ALL RIGHT?

FAKE OR NOT.

- THEY SAID THEY WANTED BLACK.

YOU KNOW WHAT, FORGET ABOUT THAT.

WHY DON'T YOU GET A CHAIR IN THIS OFFICE?

- I HAVE A CHAIR IN THIS PLACE.

MY CLIENTS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE OUT BOOKING JOBS

AND MAKING MONEY, YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO COMES IN HERE

AND COMPLAINS ABOUT STANDING. - YEAH. I WONDER WHY?

- YOU KNOW WHAT, MISTER, YOU CAN CHECK THAT ATTITUDE.

I AM BUSTING MY NECK FOR YOU.

- YOU HAVE TO READ SOME OF THESE THINGS

THAT THESE PEOPLE HAVE ME DOING.

- THAT'S NOT MY PROBLEM, WHAT THEY HAVE YOU DOING.

IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH WHAT THEY HAVE YOU DOING,

THEN GET SOME BROTHERS TO WRITE A SCRIPT

OR YOU WRITE A SCRIPT.

THAT'S NOT MY JOB.

- HEY, SOMETHING HAS TO GIVE. - AND YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS?

YOU. YOU WANNA MAKE IT ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP,

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT,

YOU GOTTA TAKE A FEW SHORTS ALONG THE WAY.

YOU GOTTA LOSE A COUPLE BATTLES TO WIN THE WAR, ALL RIGHT?

SO YOU PLAY A FEW RAPISTS. SO YOU--

YOU PLAY A FEW DRUG DEALERS, YOU PLAY SOME BASKETBALL,

YOU PLAY SOME FOOTBALL.

COME ON, YOU BE THE BEST DAMN STEREOTYPE YOU KNOW HOW TO BE.

- THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS I JUST CAN'T DO.

- WON'T DO. THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT. YOU KNOW WHY?

'CAUSE THEY'RE HIRING ACCOUNTANTS AT H&R BLOCK.

TAX SEASON IS COMING UP, HERE, WANT AN APPLICATION?

- WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE THIS, MAN?

- BECAUSE AS LONG AS YOU'RE STANDING THERE,

I NEED TO SUPPLEMENT MY INCOME.

- HOW'D THE AUDITION GO TODAY?

- FUCK PETE CHATMON. - UHHH.

THAT GOOD, HUH? YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT IT?

- NO.

THANK YOU. - FOR WHAT?

- FOR STANDING BY ME.

- GO FIGURE. YOU KNOW,

DESPITE THE MANY ASSHOLE-ISH PROPERTIES IN YOUR PERSONALITY,

THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT YOU I FIND LIKEABLE.

HERE,

SOME NEW AUDITIONS.

IF YOU CAN DO THEM.

- HEY, JUST TWO-WAY ME IF ANYTHING HAPPENS WITH ANYTHING.

- MM-HM. CIAO, BABY.

- YEAH, BYE.

- PETE CHATMON, PLEASE.

PETEY, HI, HEY, COLE CARTER HERE.

YEAH, HOW'S IT GOING?

NO, JUST GOT BACK FROM SUNDANCE.

WORKING ON MY TAN. UH-HUH.

- Man: PUT ON YOUR HELMET. LET'S PLAY.

- YOU'RE RUNNING DOWN THE FIELD, THEY'RE COMING AFTER YOU,

THEY'RE TACKLING LEFT, THEY'RE TACKLING RIGHT

BUT YOU'RE TOO FANCY FOR THEM.

SWEET FEET, THAT'S IT, THAT'S IT,

GETTING JIGGY, GETTING JIGGY.

NOW, BASKETBALL. WHAT HAVE YOU GOT?

YOU CALL YOURSELF A BLACK MAN? DRIBBLE THAT DAMN BALL.

ROUND AND ROUND,

DO IT LIKE CURLY. LEBRON JAMES, MAGNIFICENT.

HAAAH!

- Man: GO AHEAD NOW, RAPE HER.

- Cool: DO WHAT? HEY, NO, I WILL NOT CALM DOWN.

HEY, HOOLIGAN, GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME.

THIS IS RIDICULOUS.

- I'M THE MURDERER, RIGHT?

- Pete: WHO ARE YOU? - Cole: YOU BE THE BEST

DAMN STEREOTYPE YOU KNOW HOW TO BE.

- Cool's mom: WE'RE MOVING. - Phil: DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT GETTING YOUR OWN PLACE?

- Pete: THE AUDITION'S OVER.

- TRY TO FOCUS.

LOOK, JUST, DO THIS, DO THIS. HWAAH!

- OK, OK. - HWAAH!

- Charli: ARE YOU HERE FOR ME?

I'M HERE FOR YOU.

YOU'RE GONNA MAKE IT.

"WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR QUITE SOME TIME NOW.

"LONG ENOUGH TO START THINKING ABOUT THINGS--

"THE BIG THINGS." IS THIS FOR A SOAP OPERA?

- COME ON. I DON'T DO SOAPS. IT'S A PILOT.

- OH? - CONTINUE.

OK.

"YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR ME SINCE THE BEGINNING.

"I WANNA BE HERE FOR YOU UNTIL THE END."

- "I LOVE YOU SO MUCH."

- YOU'RE GONNA DO GREAT THINGS.

- Cool: BULLSHIT ACTOR DUDE.

- YOU'RE GONNA MAKE IT, COOL.

I JUST DON'T KNOW IF IT'S WITH ME.

OR WITH YOURSELF.

"I LOVE HOW YOUR EYEBROWS SERVE AS A PERFECT UMBRELLA

"TO YOUR BROWN EYES.

"I LOVE ALL FIVE FEET SEVEN INCHES OF YOU

"AND HOW YOUR BROWN AND TURQUOISE SWEAT PANTS

"PAINT THE PERFECT SILHOUETTE AROUND A WORK OF ART.

"ON DOWN TO THE BROWN SHOES,

"AND DON'T LET ME FORGET THE--THE GREEN TANK TOP."

DID YOU WRITE THIS? - WHAT?

LET ME SEE THAT. - I JUST--OH, DAMN!

LOOK, I GAVE YOU MY COPY AND THEN YOU-- - BABY, WHAT--

- WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT, NO, WE'LL READ.

I PROMISE I'LL BE-- I'LL DO IT BETTER.

WHAT ARE YOU-- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

- WILL YOU MARRY ME? - ARE YOU SERIOUS?

- I'M SERIOUS, WILL YOU MARRY ME?

BE MY WIFE?

OH, MY GOD.

- ARE YOU SMILING BECAUSE YOU'RE GONNA SAY YES

OR YOU SMILING BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO--

- YES! YES! - THANK YOU,

THAT'S WHAT I WANNA HEAR, LET ME GET YOUR FINGER.

- OH, MY GOD.

- Cool: IT'S ONLY THE BEGINNING, I PROMISE YOU,

I'LL GET YOU A BETTER RING.

- OH, MY GOD.

HEY?

- AGAIN? - I CAN'T STAY AWAY FROM MY FAVORITE LADY.

- DON'T COME BY MY HOUSE ANYMORE, OK?

- MY LIFE IS NOT YOUR MOVIE SET. - YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE SO RIGHT.

I APOLOGIZE. MOST LIKELY, IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.

- OH!

- I SEE YOU HAD THE CHEF PICK UP THE CAR?

- NO, HE HAD SOME CASES TO TAKE CARE OF

SO I WENT AND PICKED IT UP FROM DERRICK.

FOR SOME REASON, ED LIKED YOU, SO--

- OH, YEAH? THAT WOULD PROBABLY BE THE CHARM.

'CAUSE I'M A REAL CHARMING GUY, A LOT OF PEOPLE SAY THAT.

OF COURSE I'D PREFER IF THE CHARM WORKED ON YOU.

- DID YOU REALLY GET THE LICENSE PLATES?

- OH, HM-- THE--THE PLATES? - THE PLATES, COOL?

- OH. OH!

- SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE. - YEAH.

- WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHAT ARE-- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

- YEAH, I NEED A RIDE TO WORK.

- HOW DID YOU GET HERE? - I WALKED.

- WELL, THEN WALK BACK.

- COME ON, CHARLI, THESE-- THESE AIN'T MY WALKING SHOES.

THEY'RE MY DANCING SHOES.

- GET IN.

- GIRL, LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.

- WHAT? - NO, NEVER MIND, FORGET IT.

- THAT'S SO TYPICAL OF YOU. I KNOW YOUR GAME.

PLAY THE CARD, PUT IT ON THE TABLE.

- NO, NO, NO, NO, TALKING ABOUT WHAT ED HAS OVER ME

IS NOT MY IDEA OF WITTY BANTER OR--OR STIMULATING CONVERSATION.

I'LL TAKE THE CARD BACK, FORGET IT.

- REALLY?

YES, THAT'S JUST SO TYPICAL, THAT'S SO YOU, YOU KNOW?

YOU MAKE THE RULES AND ONLY YOU CAN BREAK THEM.

HYPOCRISY AT ITS FINEST. GO AHEAD, JUST SAY IT.

- NO, LET'S MOVE ON TO SOMETHING ELSE, MAN.

YOU KNOW, YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL TODAY, LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT. - FUCK OFF.

- REGGIE, THIS MAY BE YOUR LAST CHANCE TO SAY ANYTHING TO ME.

JUST SAY IT, REGGIE.

- THE ONLY REASON WHY I KNEW IT WAS YOU THE OTHER DAY

WAS 'CAUSE OF YOUR EYES, NOT 'CAUSE OF YOUR SMILE.

- YOU'RE DEFINITELY GETTING BETTER.

- WHAT? I'M SERIOUS, THIS IS NOT AN ACT.

- I'M STRESSED, OK? I MEAN, I'M PLANNING A WEDDING.

I'LL BE THE HAPPIEST WOMAN WHEN TOMORROW, I WALK DOWN THAT AISLE,

I MEET ED DOWN THERE AND I SAY, "I DO," OK?

- PLANNING? YOU SURE? SHOW--SHOW ME SOME PLANNING?

LET ME SEE YOUR TO DO LIST, CHARLI.

WHERE'S THE MICROSOFT OUTLOOK?

DON'T YOU GOT A BLACKBERRY OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?

HOW ABOUT A POST-IT NOTE, FOR GOD'S SAKE?

WE ARE CHILLING ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD

IN A CAR THAT HAS JUST STOPPED.

WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOU PLANNING HERE?

- MY MOTHER'S DOING ALL THE PLANNING SO--

- OH, BOY, EVERYBODY LOVES BIG MOMMA.

- WHAT IS THAT ABOUT?

- COME ON, YOU KNOW SHE NEVER LIKED ME.

- YOU'RE RIGHT. SHE'S GOOD WITH THAT KIND OF STUFF.

- HA HA HA.

- THERE'S NOT MUCH LEFT TO DO ANYWAY.

JUST DOUBLE CHECK ON THE FLOWERS AND SHOW UP, THAT'S IT.

- SHOW UP TO MARRY THE WRONG GUY, IF YOU ASK ME.

IF YOU DON'T SEE THAT, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, CHARLI. DAMN.

- YOU KNOW WHAT, REGGIE, YOU KNOW,

THERE'S NO NEED FOR YOU TO BE DISRESPECTING ME.

JUST GET OUT OF THE CAR. GET OUT OF THE CAR. - COME--

- IT WAS A BAD IDEA, GET OUT.

- COME ON, CHARLI. - REGGIE, GET OUT.

- YOU KNOW, FINE, FINE, FINE, I'M GOING, I'M GOING.

YOU KNOW, YOU WANNA GO HOME TO YOUR LITTLE FAKE-ASS THURGOOD MARSHALL,

YOU KNOW, DO THAT, HE DOESN'T KNOW YOU LIKE I DO ANYWAY.

MAN, YOU'RE BEING STUPID. - FINE!

- OW! - THEN THAT'S WHAT I AM. GET OUT OF MY CAR.

- WELL, I AM GOING. - I CAN'T FUCKING TAKE YOUR SHIT ANYMORE.

- I AIN'T STUPID. - STUPID!

- SO HOW DO YOU GET OUT OF THIS MOTHERFUCKER?

GET SOME POWER LOCKS.

- Charli: OH, COME ON, COME ON.

WHAT THE F--

I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE. - NO, NO I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

JUST WATCH OUT.

- WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE PUSHING ME ALL THE TIME?

- JUST--WOMAN.

SEE CAUSE THE RE-- 'CAUSE THIS THING, WHEN YOU--

NO, BUT THEN SOMETIMES ON THE CAR, LIKE THIS, YOU NEED TO GET UNDER--

I DON'T KNOW WHAT-- I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.

- OF COURSE.

- COME ON, CHARLI, LET ME JUST SPEND

THIS LAST AFTERNOON WITH YOU, HUH?

- NO.

- COME ON, LOOK, I KNOW I CAN'T HAVE ANYTHING MORE.

I CAN'T POSSIBLY HAVE ANYTHING LESS

THAN HOW IT STANDS NOW.

COME ON, LET ME JUST GO INTO THE CITY WITH YOU

AND HELP YOU OUT WITH ALL THE WEDDING THINGS IF YOU NEED IT.

- YOU'RE GONNA HELP ME WITH MY WEDDING PLANS?

- YEAH. I'M MAN ENOUGH TO DO THAT.

YOU CAN EVEN CALL BIG MOMMA AND TELL HER

WHO HELPED YOU WITH EVERYTHING.

LOOK, I'M SORRY ABOUT THE COMMENT IN THE CAR.

IT WAS RUDE.

- YEAH, I DON'T KNOW, REGGIE. - YOU KNOW ME, DON'T YOU?

- THAT'S WHY I SAY THAT I DON'T-- I DON'T KNOW, I--

- LOOK, I WOULD DO A LOT OF THINGS

BUT WHAT I WON'T DO IS DISRESPECT YOUR RELATIONSHIP.

UNLESS, OF COURSE, YOU ASK ME TO.

WHAT DO YOU SAY? JERSEY TRANSIT?

- I CAN'T MAKE UP MY MIND ABOUT THESE FLOWERS.

- MMM. SOME MAY CALL THAT A SIGN.

- THIS IS IT, OK? WHAT DO YOU THINK?

- YOU REALLY WANNA KNOW?

I THINK IT'S REALLY TOO LATE TO CHANGE ANYTHING, CHARLI.

YOU GOTTA MARRY THE DUDE. - I'M NOT ASKING YOU THAT.

- NO, I WAS JUST JOKING. NO, SERIOUSLY THOUGH,

I THINK SIMPLE IS BETTER. LOVE IS SIMPLE, RIGHT?

- YEAH.

- GET YOUR FAVORITE COLOR AND NOTHING ELSE.

- GET RED. - I LOVE RED.

ALL RIGHT. HI?

- HI? - I'M DRIVING YOU CRAZY HERE.

SO, OK. - YEAH.

- I HAVE 75 OF THESE SETTING ORDERED FOR TOMORROW, RIGHT?

- AND HOW IS THAT LOOKING? - IT LOOKS GOOD, BUT YOU DON'T.

- OH. - RELAX.

GIRL, COME ON, YOU GETTING MARRIED.

JUMP ON THE BROOM.

YOU TWO LOOK LIKE SUCH A GOOD COUPLE.

YE-- AWW.

HEY, CAN I GET A BOUQUET OF THOSE FOR THE MISSUS?

- ALL RIGHT. - WOW.

CONGRATULATIONS ON THE WEDDING.

A WHOLE LOT OF SHOPPING FOR THREE VERY, VERY, SMALL BAGS.

OH, I DON'T--I DON'T-- - NO,

- YOU SAID YOU WERE MAN ENOUGH TO HANDLE THIS.

- YEAH, I KNOW-- WOMAN, I KNOW WHAT I SAID.

THE ROSES SMELL GOOD. - YOU WANNA GO SOMEWHERE TO EAT?

- NO--PROBLEM.

- CAN YOU HOLD MY BAGS? - UH--

- DO YOU HAVE A CHOICE? - NOT REALLY.

I'M LOOKING REAL MASCULINE RIGHT NOW

WITH THESE PURPLE BAGS, THANK YOU.

- AND WITH THE FLOWERS TOO. ANYWAY, COME ON.

I HOPE YOU DIDN'T MIND THE STREET MEAT.

- STREET MEAT?

- YEAH. YOU KNOW, HOT DOGS, KEBABS, GYROS,

ANYTHING YOU GET ON THE STREET.

MEAT FROM THE STREET, STREET MEAT.

A TERM OF ENDEARMENT, COMES BEFORE A LITTLE WORRY ONCE YOU GET--

CATCH A BAD BATCH. - IT'S NOT HALF AS BAD.

- MMM, WHAT? STREET MEAT OR ME?

- THE STREET MEAT. - HA HA HA. THANKS.

WHAT IS THAT--

- HEY, COOL? HOW YOU DOING?

- HEY? HEY!

- FARRAH, HOW YOU DOING? - GOOD.

- YEAH, FARRAH, THIS IS, UH, THIS IS CHARLI,

CHARLI, THIS IS FARRAH. - HEY.

YOU'RE HERE FOR THE CALLBACK, RIGHT?

- AH, YES, YES, I'M HERE FOR THE CALLBACK.

- YOU TOO? - JUST BOOKED WHAT ABOUT US.

- WOW, HEY, CONGRATULATIONS. THAT'S, THAT'S GOOD.

- YEAH. THANKS FOR THE WELL WISHES. - NO, REALLY, IT'S GOOD NEWS.

IT'S JUST BEEN KIND OF A CRAZY DAY, THAT'S ALL.

CHECK IT OUT, YOU THINK THEY STILL UP THERE?

- THEY WERE PACKING UP WHEN I WAS LEAVING, SO, WELL--

I THINK I'M GONNA GO.

- HEY, JUST--CONGRATULATIONS, FOR REAL THIS TIME.

I'M PROUD OF YOU.

OK, UH, LOOK. I HAVE THIS REALLY BIG AUDITION,

IT JUST SO HAPPENS TO BE BOOM! RIGHT HERE IN THIS BUILDING

WHERE WE'RE SITTING IN FRONT OF.

I MEAN, I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HERE A COUPLE OF HOURS AGO.

- OH, WOW.

BECAUSE OF ME, YOU DIDN'T GET HERE ON TIME?

WHAT? YOU WASTED TWO HOURS ON LITTLE OLD ME?

- COME ON, BABE. - DON'T BABE ME.

- NOW, LISTEN, WE, WE WERE WALKING DOWN THE STREET,

ENJOYING THE STREET MEAT, IT WAS GOOD, DELICIOUS,

IT WAS DELECTABLE, RIGHT?

AND THEN, POW! LET'S JUST WALK INTO THE LOBBY,

WE CAN DISCUSS IT IN THERE.

IF ANYTHING, THE AUDITION MIGHT BE OVER.

- OK. - YEAH?

- YEAH. - YEAH, I KNEW YOU'D UNDERSTAND,

THAT'S WHY YOU'RE WHO YOU ARE.

I HOPE THEY'RE STILL THERE.

I REALLY NEED THIS JOB, CHARLI.

- YOU BLEW IT. - HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.

- MAN, COME ON. - YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?

I KNOW I'M RUNNING LATE, MAN, I JUST, I RAN INTO A COUPLE OF THINGS.

- YEAH, I SEE. - NO, HE WAS--

MY CAR BROKE DOWN, ALL RIGHT?

AND, AND--HE--HE WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP ME FIX IT.

THAT'S WHY HE WAS LATE.

- OK. WELL, YOU'VE GOT THE BAGS,

YOU'VE GOT THE ROSES, GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR CAREER.

- THIS, THIS IS MY LIFE, CHARLI, THIS HERE IS MY STORY.

WHY ARE YOU WALKING AWAY? DON'T WALK AWAY FROM ME.

- WHY NOT, HUH?

- JUST LET ME TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND.

- YOU DON'T WANNA HEAR WHAT I HAVE TO SAY.

- WHAT, ARE YOU GONNA TELL ME TOMORROW?

- AS MUCH AS I CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH,

I'M NOT GONNA OFFER YOU A SHOULDER TO LEAN ON.

OK?

BECAUSE FOR ONCE, I'M GONNA BE THE SELFISH ONE.

GO FIND SOMEBODY ELSE BECAUSE I'M GONNA THINK ABOUT MYSELF.

FOR ONCE, REGGIE, THAT'S ALL YOU HAD TO DO.

ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS THINK ABOUT ME.

YOU CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE, YOU HAVE TO STOP,

YOU HAVE TO LEAVE ME ALONE. - I CAN'T, I CAN'T, CHARLI.

LOOK, I'VE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH YOU FOR THE SECOND TIME.

YOU KNOW WHAT? I NEVER FELL OUT OF LOVE WITH YOU

THE FIRST TIME WHEN I WALKED YOU HOME FROM SCHOOL

AND YOU SLIPPED ON THAT ICE PATCH.

THIS IS LIFE, THIS RIGHT HERE IS THE ILLEST MOVIE THAT THERE IS,

EXCEPT THERE'S NO CREDITS TO WALK OUT ON.

NO--NO SCRIPT, NO--NO REHEARSAL, JUST RAW EMOTION.

WHICH YOU NEVER GOT FROM ME WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER BECAUSE--

I WAS TOO AFRAID TO TAKE THE ARMOR OFF.

I LOVE YOU, CHARLI,

YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT YOU DON'T LOVE ME.

YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT.

- NO, I CAN'T TELL YOU THAT.

AND YOU CAN'T EXPECT US TO BE GOOD

ONLY BECAUSE, ALL OF A SUDDEN, YOU'VE FOUND THE SOFTNESS

THAT IT TAKES TO BE A FUCKING MAN, REGGIE.

YOU JUST CAN'T DO THAT.

- Cool: WE'RE NOT THROUGH, CHARLI. - EXCUSE ME.

Charli: I'LL DRIVE YOU TO THE STATION.

- THANK YOU.

- WHERE'S DERRICK? - HE HAD AN EMERGENCY.

HE LEFT FIVE HOURS AGO.

WHAT YOU ACTING ALL UPSET ABOUT?

I HAVEN'T EVEN TOLD YOU THE GOOD NEWS YET.

- WHAT'S THAT? - YOU'RE FIRED.

WELL, YOU ACT LIKE YOUR NAME'S NOT ON THE SCHEDULE.

I'M JUST TRYING TO MAKE IT A REALITY FOR YOU.

- DON'T YOU WANT ME TO PAY YOU BACK?

- OH, YOU WILL. EVERY LAST CENT.

BUT WHERE YOU GET THE MONEY FROM, THAT'S ON YOU.

- SO IT'S JUST LIKE THAT? - IT IS THAT.

MM-HM. YOU'RE FREE TO GO.

SEE YOU AROUND.

DO YOU WANNA COME IN?

FROM THE FACE-OFF, BACK TO THE CORNER,

MAKES A SHOT--

- YOU KNOW, I DON'T-- I DON'T DO TOO MUCH OF THIS.

- I KNOW YOU DON'T, IT'S JUST IN CASE.

- YOU CAN'T STAY LONG ANYWAY. - Man on TV: HOPE YOU COME BACK TOMORROW.

- WHERE IS HE?

- BACHELOR PARTY.

AH! WHAT IS THIS?

..ORDINARY BURGERS JUST CAN'T SATISFY

THE MODERN-DAY BLACK MAN.

WE LIKES OUR FOOD TO HAVE THAT EXTRA LARGE FLAVOR, BABY.

THAT'S WHY, HERE AT BURGER JESTER,

WE HAVE A COMMITMENT TO BEEF.

I DON'T WANNA WATCH THIS.

WHAT YOU GOT TO LISTEN TO?

WORD. YOU STILL HAVE THIS?

DOES ED KNOW HOW YOU FEEL WHEN YOU LISTEN TO THIS SONG?

♪ CAN'T NOBODY LOVE YOU LIKE I'M LOVING YOU, BABY ♪

♪ 'CAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW HOW

ONE LAST DANCE?

♪ TO LOVE YOU LIKE I DO

♪ OH, MMMM

- ONLY CAUSE YOU LOOK LIKE A SAD PUPPY IN THE RAIN.

♪ LIKE I'M LOVING YOU, BABY

♪ 'CAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU LIKE I DO ♪

♪ I'M GONNA LOVE YOU IN THE MORNING ♪

♪ LOVE YOU LATE AT NIGHT

♪ GIRL, I AIN'T GONNA STOP LOVING YOU ♪

♪ TILL YOU TELL ME EVERYTHING'S ALL RIGHT ♪

♪ EVERYTHING'S ALL RIGHT

♪ OOH ♪ CAN'T NOBODY LOVE YOU LIKE I'M LOVING YOU RIGHT NOW ♪

♪ 'CAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU LIKE I DO ♪

♪ AND, OH, OH, OH, CAN'T NOBODY KISS YOU ♪ ♪ CAN'T NOBODY KISS YOU

♪ LIKE I'M KISSING YOU, LITTLE GIRL ♪

♪ 'CAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO KISS YOU LIKE I DO ♪

♪ NO, THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU ♪

♪ LIKE I DO

- CHARLI,

WHY ISN'T THIS OUR WEDDING?

- WE SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT.

- IF YOU TELL ME RIGHT NOW

THAT YOU LOVE HIM MORE THAN YOU LOVE ME,

I'LL GO, NO QUESTIONS.

- REGGIE, IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE. - IT IS THAT SIMPLE.

- IT IS THAT SIMPLE. - YOU THINK--YOU THINK

ONLY--ONLY WITH LOVE, TWO PEOPLE CAN--CAN MAKE IT?

- WHAT IS IT ABOUT THIS GUY? WHAT DOES HE HAVE THAT I DON'T HAVE?

- HE'S JUST-- HE'S CONSISTENT. HE GIVES ME A HAPPINESS.

HE NOTICES IF I'VE-- IF I'VE CUT MY HAIR.

HE WANTS TO HAVE A FAMILY, THEREFORE HE WORKS HARD FOR IT

AND WE'RE MOVING TO A HOME AND WE'RE DOING IT RIGHT.

- YOU'RE DOING IT TYPICAL, A HOUSE, A CAR,

ALL--THESE THINGS COME WITH TIME.

WHY DOES HE GET THIS AND I DON'T?

- HE CAN BE A GOOD FATHER.

- YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT KIND OF FATHER I COULD HAVE BEEN.

YOU LEFT.

- BABY? HEY!

- ED.

- LOOK, I WAS JUST ABOUT TO LEAVE, MAN.

- IS THERE SOMETHING YOU WANNA TELL ME?

I CAN JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS REAL QUICK

BUT I'M TRYING TO BE AN ADULT ABOUT THIS RIGHT NOW.

I'M TRYING REAL HARD.

- JUST RELAX, SHE LOVES YOU, YOU'LL BE A GREAT FATHER.

- REGGIE? - REGGIE?

THIS IS REGGIE?

YOU TWO SAT UP IN MY HOUSE, AT MY TABLE,

AND LIED TO MY FACE?

- ED, ED, IT'S NOT-- IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.

BABY, NO, IT'S-- IT'S-- IT WAS MY MISTAKE.

- OH, NO, NO, I'M JUST LOOKING AT THE EVIDENCE, ALL RIGHT?

- OH, NO, NO, YOU HAVE TO TRUST ME ON THIS.

I'M VERY SORRY, OK? - CHARLI, CHARLI, COME ON, CHARLI. COME ON.

IT'S MY FAULT, MAN.

- OH, NO, NO, THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND HER.

NOT YOU OR WHOEVER YOU'RE PRETENDING TO BE TODAY.

ALL RIGHT? SO JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE.

- DON'T TOUCH ME, MAN. - HEY, MAN.

I'M NOT GONNA ASK YOU AGAIN, LET'S GO.

GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, MAN! - NO! NO!

- THIS IS MY HOUSE. - ED, STOP IT!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ED, STOP IT!

YOU HAVE TO GO.

YOU HAVE TO GO.

- THIS IS HOW THE STORY ENDS? - YES.

- THE STORY?

I HAVEN'T HIT ANYBODY SINCE GOLDEN GLOVES.

- THERE AREN'T ENOUGH WORDS FOR ME TO APOLOGIZE.

- HEY, YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT THAT. YOU ARE RIGHT ABOUT THAT.

- I'M VERY SORRY, I CAN'T TELL YOU ENOUGH.

- YEAH, AND WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?

WHAT? BELIEVE YOU WITH THE SAME, UH--

SAME TRUST NOW, WITH THE SAME EASE NOW,

- WITH THE SAME ANYTHING? - YES, OF COURSE.

- OH, OF COURSE, OF COURSE. YEAH.

- ED, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - UH, EXACTLY, WHAT AM I DOING?

YOU, ON THE COUCH, NOT ME, GO.

- NO.

- THE COUCH.

- DO YOU STILL WANNA DO THIS? - I'M GONNA SLEEP ON IT.

- YOU'RE GONNA SLEEP ON IT? - YES.

- WE'RE GETTING MARRIED IN LESS THAN TEN HOURS, ED.

- THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT

FOR THE LAST TEN HOURS YOU SPENT WITH THAT DUDE.

HUH? WHAT ABOUT THOSE TEN HOURS?

- IF YOU DON'T WANT THIS, WHAT ARE WE GONNA TELL EVERYBODY?

- I'M NOT TELLING ANYBODY SHIT.

IF WE DON'T DO THIS, YOU'RE GONNA TELL THEM THE TRUTH.

YOU'RE GONNA TELL THEM WHAT YOU DID.

- I LOVE YOU. - I LOVE YOU TOO, CHARLI.

THAT HASN'T CHANGED.

BUT I'M GONNA GO TO BED.

- Cool's mother: COME AND GET IT, BUBBA.

- GOOD MORNING. - GOOD MORNING.

- HAVE A SEAT.

- HOW WAS THE WEDDING?

- I DON'T KNOW, I COOKED THE FOOD

BUT I COULDN'T STAY THERE FOR THAT.

HM.

- UH--AMEN. - AMEN.

- UM, YOU CAN WORK AT THE STATION FOR AS LONG

AS YOU NEED TO OR WANT TO.

- ALL RIGHT, THANKS.

- UH--

UH--

SOMETIMES, LOVE TAKES A LONG TIME TO WORK ITSELF OUT.

- WHAT ARE YOU SAYING TO ME, MAN?

- NO, NO, NO, I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT ME AND YOU,

I'M TALKING ABOUT US.

I'VE KNOWN YOUR MOTHER FOR 30 YEARS.

- MA, YOU CHEATED ON DAD? - NO.

- WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? - NO, NO, NO, NO.

- WHOA, THIS IS NOT GOING AS SMOOTHLY AS I PLANNED.

LET'S JUST HOP RIGHT TO IT.

WHAT I'M SAYING THIS MORNING IS,

PEOPLE MARRY THE WRONG PEOPLE

ALL THE TIME.

- AND IT'S NO DIFFERENT WITH CHARLI

THAT IT WAS WITH ME AND YOUR FATHER.

BABY, IF IT'S TRUE AND IF IT'S RIGHT,

LOVE WILL FIND ITS WAY HOME. - YEAH.

- NOW, I KNOW THE LAST FEW DAYS HAVE BEEN HARD ON YOU.

BUT I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU.

- OH, NO, COME ON, Y'ALL, I'M IN A REAL--

FRAGILE PLACE RIGHT NOW I DON'T NEED TO HEAR

ANY MORE BAD NEWS.

- I'VE ASKED YOUR MOTHER TO MARRY ME.

- AND I'VE ACCEPTED. - CONGRATULATIONS.

YEAH, YEAH, CONGRATULATIONS.

- YEAH, YOU KNOW, THAT THING YOU DO WITH THE FEATHERS.

YEAH. LISTEN, UH, SWEETIE, I GOTTA GO.

GOTTA GO. RIGHT.

BYE.

HOW ARE YOU?

- I'M STILL STANDING. - AH.

- DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING FOR ME?

- I HAVE SOME ADVICE FOR YOU. COME HERE, HAVE A SEAT.

COME ON.

I MAY NOT LOOK LIKE YOU OR TALK LIKE YOU,

FORTUNATELY I DON'T HAVE YOUR ATTITUDE,

BUT I HAVE BEEN IN YOUR SHOES BEFORE.

IT'S ALL GONNA WORK OUT.

IT'S ALL GONNA WORK OUT IF YOU STAY OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY.

- THAT'S IT? - THAT'S IT.

THAT ONE'S FREE, I GOT SOMETHING ELSE FOR YOU.

- PLEASE DON'T LET IT BE A BULLSHIT AUDITION.

I WILL QUIT THE BUSINESS BEFORE I DO ANOTHER BULLSHIT AUDITION.

MATTER OF FACT, I WAS THINKING ABOUT WRITING A SCREENPLAY

ABOUT MY OWN LIFE.

- SLOW DOWN, WALDO SALT, GET OUT OF MY CHAIR.

OUT, OUT, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.

FOR YOUR INFORMATION, I HAVE TO LET YOU KNOW

THAT CHATMON HAS A PART IN WHAT ABOUT US.

THAT HE WANTS TO OFFER TO YOU.

- THE LEAD? - A PART.

HE WROTE A VERY SMALL ROLE INTO THE SCRIPT.

IT'S TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, THEY NEED TO KNOW TODAY,

- WHAT DO YOU SAY? - YES.

- YES? - YES.

- YOU'RE SURE, 'CAUSE REMEMBER, A MINUTE AGO,

YOU WERE--YOU WERE EMBARKING ON THAT WRITING CAREER?

- YES. I WANT THE PART, YES.

- HEY, NOW, NOW. - ALL RIGHT!

- YEAH!

MAN, WHAT YOU GOT FOR ME? MAKE MY DAY.

- WE'VE GOT YOUR PHONE BILL, THE VISA,

PLAYBOY MAGAZINE.

- MEN'S ENTERTAINMENT. - AS THEY SAY.

- YES!

- AND, HOLD ON, WHAT'S THIS?

YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY NOW. - YEAH.

Man: AND CUT.

OK, I THINK WE'VE GOT EVERYTHING WE NEED.

- GOOD WORK, BABY. - OH, THANK YOU.

- YOU LOOK GOOD.

- I'M TRYING TO GIVE IT A LITTLE CHARACTER,

SO I CAN BE REMEMBERED.

- WHAT'S UP? WHO ARE YOU?

- I'M DARREL. - DARREL?

- YEAH.

- OH, WELL, DARREL, DON'T EVER THINK

THAT THIS ISN'T A GREAT JOB.

AND NO MATTER WHAT, ALWAYS SHOW UP ON TIME, YOU GOT ME?

YEAH.

- HOW LONG YOU BEEN WORKING HERE, MAN?

- A YEAR. I CAME HERE RIGHT AFTER YOU LEFT.

THAT'S WHAT BIG PHIL TOLD ME. - YOU KNOW WHO I AM?

- OF COURSE I KNOW WHO YOU ARE, EVERYONE AROUND HERE KNOWS WHO YOU ARE.

YOU'RE COOL, MAN.

I'M DARREL, DERRICK'S MY COUSIN.

- HEY, COOL. - WHAT'S UP, PHIL?

HOW YOU DOING, MAN?

- OH, MAN, AS YOU CAN SEE, SAME OLD STATION.

GAS, CARS, CARS, GAS.

- WE'VE BEEN THROUGH QUITE A FEW MECHANICS THOUGH.

HARD TO KEEP A QUALITY GUY.

BUT THE KID ON THE PUMP, HE IS GOOD.

NEVER BREAKS THE RULES, ALWAYS ON TIME.

- YOU HIRED DERRICK'S COUSIN? - DERRICK'S A GOOD KID.

I JUST COULDN'T HAVE ALL THAT MESS BREWING AROUND THE STATION.

- OH, YEAH, LIKE FRAUD. YEAH, I SEE THAT.

- YEAH, FRAUD.

- YOU SHOULD WATCH OUT, IT MIGHT RUN IN THE FAMILY.

- YEAH, WELL, I WOULD HAVE HELPED THE KID IF HE'D ONLY ASKED.

- HELLO, MA'AM? - MA'AM? WOW. YOU DO THAT.

I MEAN, YOU'RE TRYING TO BE POLITE, BUT NO.

JUST FILL IT UP, OK? PREMIUM. - OK.

- HERE IS THE FINAL TUITION REPAYMENT.

JUST GET A BIG-SCREEN TV IN YOUR NEW HOUSE.

ON ME.

- WOW.

- WELL, YOU'VE BEEN TAKING GOOD CARE OF MY MOM TOO. I MEAN THAT.

- LOOK, YOU, UH--DO YOU HAVE FURNITURE FOR YOUR PLACE?

- YEAH. YEAH, YOU KNOW, A LITTLE SOMETHING SOMETHING.

I'M JUST HAPPY TO BE IN A NEW PLACE WITH NO MICE.

- OH! - FOR A CHANGE, YOU KNOW?

IT'S JUST THAT I WORK SO MUCH IT'S LIKE I'M RARELY EVER THERE.

- YEAH. - THAT'S OK, THOUGH.

- YEAH, IT'S, UH-- YEAH. - YEAH.

WHICH REMINDS ME, YEAH, I GOT A--

I GOT AN APPOINTMENT IN AN HOUR. I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE.

- OH, THAT'S COOL.

YOU TAKE CARE, SON.

- FILL HER UP?

YEAH.

- HEY. - HEY.

- I SAW YOUR FILM. - YEAH?

- YES.

- YEAH, WELL I MEAN, I WOULDN'T REALLY CALL IT MY FILM,

BEING AS I WAS ONLY ON SCREEN FOR, LIKE, 48 SECONDS.

- COME ON, IT WAS GOOD, IT WAS GOOD.

- THANK YOU.

NO, NO, NO, COME ON.

OK.

- WE LEARNT A LOT THAT DAY.

IS MATRIMONY AS HOLY AS THEY SAY IT IS?

- WE DIDN'T GET MARRIED.

I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT YOU.

I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD BE ABLE TO SAY THAT I DIDN'T, BUT--

- I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT YOU TOO, I'M NOT AFRAID TO ADMIT IT.

WHAT ARE YOU-- WHAT ARE YOU UP TO RIGHT NOW?

- COME ON, COOL. - NO, IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW,

I MISS YOU SOMETIMES, THAT'S ALL.

WELL--

YOU LOOK GOOD UP ON THAT SCREEN.

- YEAH? THANK YOU.

- LOOK, UM--

I DON'T KNOW, YOU KNOW,

JUST IN CASE, YOU KNOW?

YOU NEVER KNOW.

MAYBE WE'LL RUN INTO EACH OTHER SOMETIME.

AND MY MOTHER ALWAYS SAID YOU WERE THE ONE.

- BYE.

- IS EVERYTHING OK?

- LIGHT'S GREEN, BABY.

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, LIFE IS A STAGE, SO PLAY YOUR PART ♪

♪ STEP ON STAGE RIGHT FROM THE START ♪

♪ EVERYBODY OUT THERE GOT A ROLE TO PLAY ♪

♪ TAKE MY ADVICE, HEAR WHAT I SAY ♪

♪ SOME MIGHT HAVE IT, SOME MIGHT NOT ♪

♪ YOU GOTTA BE CLEVER ABOUT WHAT YOU GOT ♪

♪ YOU GOT A LITTLE, YOU GOT A LOT ♪

♪ SOME GET STABBED AND SOME GET SHOT ♪

♪ AS TIME GOES ON, SOME THINGS WILL CHANGE ♪

♪ YOUR AGE, YOUR WEIGHT, YOUR FACE, YOUR NAME ♪

♪ AS LIFE GOES ON, YOU'LL CHANGE YOUR MIND ♪

♪ YOU'LL SEEK SOME LIGHT WHERE YOU WERE BLIND ♪

♪ IT'S ALL JUST A PART OF THE GAME WE PLAY ♪

♪ SO DON'T PLAY A HIT LIKE THE PLAYERS SAY ♪

♪ SOME WIN, SOME LOSE, HEY, THAT'S OK ♪

♪ THE GAME IS THE SAME WHEN THE PLAYERS PLAY ♪

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪

♪ LOOK ABOUT IT, YOUR BET LAST NIGHT WAS RIGHT ♪

♪ YOU ONLY CAUGHT US OUT 'CAUSE YOUR PANTS WERE TIGHT ♪

♪ HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU PLAYED THE GAME? ♪

♪ SAME OLD LINE, "BABY, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" ♪

♪ HEINOUS PLAY ON THE COURT BEFORE ♪

♪ AND HE'LL DO A FORTUNE IN A COURT OF LAW ♪

♪ THE VERY SAME GUY THAT'S WITH YOUR FRIEND ♪

♪ BUT YOU JUST WANNA RIDE IN HIS BENZ ♪

♪ THINK YOU'RE PLAYING HIM BUT YOU'RE NOT ♪

♪ 'CAUSE HE'S TRYING TO GET WHAT YOU GOT ♪

♪ YOU GET SOME JEWELLERY AND SOME CASH ♪

♪ AND YOU FOOLISHLY GIVING UP THE ACT ♪

♪ TAKE WHAT HE GOT, HE GOT THE BUG ♪

♪ THINK WHAT YOU DID, YOU GET THE NUTS ♪

♪ IT'S ALL JUST A PART OF THE GAME WE PLAY ♪

♪ WHEN YOU SEE THOSE PLAYERS JUST WALK AWAY ♪

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪

♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ OOH, DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪ ♪ THIS IS WHAT I'M SAYING

♪ EVERYBODY PLAYS THE POOL SOMETIME ♪

♪ BUT SOMETIMES THAT'S NOT COOL ♪

♪ EVERYBODY WANNA BE COOL

♪ EVERYBODY CAN'T BE COOL

♪ PLAY THE GAME, DON'T BREAK THE RULES ♪

♪ LEARN A LITTLE SOMETHING LIKE YOU LEARNED AT SCHOOL ♪

♪ LISTEN TO WHAT I'M SAYING TO YOU ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I DO THE THINGS REAL COOL PEOPLE DO ♪

♪ HEY, MY TOOLS, THEY SAY BE PART OF THE CROWD ♪

♪ I TRY TO RUN THIS FOR REAL ♪

♪ THEY SAY I'M BEING TOO PROUD

♪ AND WHEN I ROLL WITH THE PUNCHES ♪

♪ I GET KNOCKED ON THE GROUND

♪ BY ALL THIS BULLSHIT GOING DOWN ♪

♪ DO YOU KNOW? DO YOU KNOW?

♪ DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? ♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ WHO YOU ARE? ♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ WHO ARE YOU? ♪ DO YOU KNOW?

♪ WHO ARE YOU? ♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

♪ DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE? WHO YOU ARE? ♪

♪ DO YOU KNOW? ♪ OH, WHAT'S YOUR STORY?