All language subtitles for My Favorite Martian s02e08 The Great Brain Robbery

Boy, you could have saved me an awful
lot of trouble in grammar school.

You?

Cleaning the erasers?

Oh, come now, Tim. I don't visualize you
as the teacher's pet. Oh, yeah. Listen,

I had a real beat, and she was a
swinger.

Well, oh, listen.

For you, a little something to celebrate
your new status as teacher.

Although, frankly, I have the vaguest
idea why you're getting involved in all

this. Well, Tim, I did think it was
about time I made some financial

contribution around here.

And when Mrs. Brown told me that she
knew of this boy, Eddie Prescott, who

needed some gray matter... Eddie
Prescott?

That is a hard way to make a buck.

Yeah, I understand he is a bit of a
terror. Well, a 12 -year -old hardened

criminal is more like it. Of course, I
guess kids do toughen up in this

California climate.

Open it.

Oh, Tim, you shouldn't have.

Uncle Martin, they're not the crown
jewels. They're just a simple pair of

cufflinks. Get those silver cufflinks
out of this apartment!

What happened?

Silver. They were practically pure
silver.

I know.

I paid for them.

Silver is disaster for a Martian's
electrical system, especially pure

I come close to pure silver, it
discharges my high -tension nervous

short -circuits the solid -state
protoplasmic transistors in my brain.

Brain! Simple, Uncle Martin.

Make it simpler. Simpler.

Simpler, eh? Simpler for a simpleton.
All right. Then it changes me into a

brain.

Horrors. Well, anyway, Tim, it's the
thought that counts. But hereafter,

to gold and platinum. They reinforce a
Martian's electrical field.

All right.

I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll trade
you the silver cufflinks and get you a

platinum bathtub.

That sounds like a great idea. But don't
have anything engraved on it. Oh?

We Martians don't like to be
ostentatious.

Shoulders back!

I like round shoulders.

I want you to make a good impression on
this new tutor.

I don't like him. You have never met
him. He'll give up, like all my

I intend to see you go through the Air
Force Academy in the old family

tradition. Off we go into the wild blue
yonder. You know I get airsick every

time I hear that song.

Learned something by the Beatles.

If I thought it would do any good, I
would spike you.

Let's not get rough.

Remember my braces?

They cost you $2 ,000.

Two grand worth of silver.

What's that for? Well, I thought we
could use a little schoolroom touch.

You cut that out.

Just a thought.

Outside that front door at this very
moment, there stands one small cloud of

juvenile evil and incorrigibility.

That would be young Eddie Prescott.

Call me if you need any judo holds
broken.

Well, you must be Eddie Prescott.

Yeah.

Please come in.

Won't you sit down?

Hey, quit pushing me!

Hey!

I'm terribly sorry, Eddie, but you must
have stumbled. I did not stumble. You

pushed me.

I was several feet away from you, young
man, and I did not touch you. Forget it.

I hate studying.

Have you ever tried it? No.

Well, then don't knock it until you've
tried it. And I don't like teachers

either.

I understand your father's in the Air
Force.

Yeah.

Missile Command.

Off we go into the wild blue yonder.

Like that.

He tells me he'd like you to go into the
Air Force Academy.

Yes!

Is that an opinion or a missile taking
off?

When does the tutoring start?

Right now.

Well, you might as well give up right
now. I'm not going to learn anything.

Which is it, Eddie?

You won't learn or you can't learn?

What does that mean?

It means that I think you are pretending
to be dumb.

I am not pretending. I am dumb.

You think you're too dumb to get in the
Air Force Academy.

You feel you've let your father down.

Well, you don't know how smart he is.

How could anyone be that smart?

Not me, that's for sure.

Eddie, you're not dumb.

You just never gave yourself a chance to
learn.

Your mind is like this blackboard.

Good, but blank.

It's as easy to learn as it is to write
on the spike board. The mind is just

like that. What's written on it, it
remembers.

Even me?

Even you, Eddie.

Gee, Uncle Martin, I never had a teacher
like you before. You even like me,

don't you?

Yes, yes. Well, let's not get all caught
up in a wave of maudlin emotion.

To learn it.

Back to English grammar.

Now, let's get down to cases.

Dangling participles.

Gee, what was that?

Yes. What was it?

Sounded like an electrical discharge.

Felt like I got a shot in the head.

And I have a kind of echo effect up in
my head.

I can learn anything I want to learn
dangling participles.

Now, what in heaven's name is that?

Now, to the Pythagorean theorem.

What's that?

You've never had plain geometry?

Just measles and whooping cough.

Well, plane geometry is a branch of
mathematics, Eddie. Oh, my head feels

swollen. Well, our first session will be
over soon. Now, just relax and let the

information penetrate.

In fact, the sum of the squares of the
two sides is equal to the square of the

hypotenuse. For instance, if the sides
were three inches and four inches, and

the hypotenuse was five, it would be
nine plus 16 equals 25, right?

It's not penetrating, Uncle Martin.
Well, it's like water in the desert,

The sand is so surprised, it takes a
while for the water to soak in.

There it goes again. My head feels more
swollen.

Back to geometry.

What's that triangle doing up there? You
were telling me about the Pythagorean

theorem.

Tell me about the what? The Pythagorean
theorem. You know, where the sum of the

squares of the sides is equal to the
square of the hypotenuse.

Yes, well, I think that's enough for
today, Eddie. I'll see you at the same

tomorrow. Boy, wait until I tell Pop and
Mom all I know about English grammar

and geometry.

Why, Uncle Martin?

English grammar and geometry.

He knows all about it, and I can't
remember a thing.

Well, how'd it go?

Tim, sit down over there and get ready
with pencil and paper.

You're kidding.

Come on, Uncle Martin, you're not
tutoring me.

Stop that nonsense and sit down, Tim.

Start a checklist of my brains.

Start a checklist of the things that I
know.

Meteorology.

Present.

Plane geometry.

Missing.

What?

Missing. You're kidding.

English grammar.

Missing. You're kidding. I don't even
know what a dangling participle is.

Missing.

Intergalactic navigation.

How do you spell that?

I don't know.

It's missing.

Say, Uncle Martin, look.

What about your extrasensory perception?
You know, well, your mind reading and

your levitation, all that.

Present.

Jim, however, I'm facing some kind of a
diabolical plot. What do you mean?

Some of my magnificent Martian brains
are missing.

Have you made coffee yet?

No. Is it morning already?

Yeah. Did you finish your brain
checklist yet? No, no. That's the curse

so gifted.

It may take days to list all of the
learning that I have packed in my head.

How much is missing?

I don't know. I can't understand it.
There's absolutely no explanation.

Well, have you tried your disappearing
act?

How about a splint?

Part of my disappearing brains are
missing.

How could you lose your brains? Either
I'm being robbed or I have a slow leak.

Slow leak.

Captain Prescott.

Coming up.

Grateful and confused.

Lots of luck.

Captain Prescott, I can't tell you how
grateful I am you are doing wonders with

my boy. Well, he's a very bright and
willing student.

Bright and willing?

You're talking about Eddie? Eddie
Prescott? Of course. Quick, bright,

responsive, obedient, polite, and
thoughtful.

My son?

Well, I... Undoubtedly, he'll be able to
enter the Air Force Academy with flying

colors. All those books he was reading
this morning.

Celestial navigation, missile physics,
fission nucleonic.

He was reading those?

This morning?

Boy,

when you tutor, you really tutor.

Well, that's just it. I didn't mention
those subjects to Eddie. And they're

of my robbed brain.

You mean Eddie is the brain robber?

Boy, what a story this would make for my
paper. I can just see the headlines

now. The great brain robbery.

Hi, son.

Hi, Pop.

Say, Pop.

Do you have any books on missile fuels
for outer space?

And what about the state of our research
program and the nuclear reactors for

particle propulsion?

Oh, I'm going to have another little
talk with your tutor.

Tim, it has to be a short circuit.

Well, at least you haven't lost your
brains about Martian physiology.

Oh, listen, I have a question for you.
After this experiment, do you think I'll

be able to get these things to work
normally again? If by normal you mean

inadequate television by which Earth
people are satisfied, yes, you are

What's this rig going to show? A little
wiring change has converted them to a

brain tester and internal analyzer. Now,
examine the screen closely with this.

Oh. All right.

What am I looking for? A slow leak. The
brains could escape from over

-intelligence pressure.

I haven't the biggest idea what a slow
leak looks like. Oh,

here's something that looks sort of like
a hammer hitting an anvil.

That's just my headache.

It can't be a slow leak.

There's something about it.

Something that's triggering my override
diaphragms and collapsing the fail -safe

interlock.

Uh -oh.

Captain Prescott.

Coming up the stairs and very, very
suspicious of me.

I'll have to use some diversionary
tactic.

Off you go. Otherwise, I'll blow you
under.

Come in, Captain.

I know why you've come over. You do?

Of course. You see, I knew how anxious
you were for Eddie to be interested in

the Air Force, space, and missiles, and
things like that. I would like the boy

to go to the Academy, yes.

So I sort of got him interested in
space.

Let's say I undertook a bit of diplomacy
at the 12 -year -old level. Yes, but

I'm rather concerned about his topics.

Naturally, I know very little about such
matters, so I'm afraid I invented some

things. Pure fiction, of course.

Science fiction.

Oh, yes.

Then his interest in my books, that
would be his source of information.

Well, certainly not me. I know
absolutely nothing about space.

Sir, you are doing a magnificent job.
Simply magnificent.

Thank you. Not at all. Thank you, sir.

Now, if Eddie will just stop putting my
brains on display.

Your father was over a while ago, Eddie.
And he's very impressed with your

progress. It's just great at home now,
Uncle Martin.

Mom's proud and Pop's grinning from ear
to ear. That's just wonderful, Eddie.

Tell me, do you like television?

Sure, but, well, it takes time from
study.

What are you doing?

You'll see.

You're not going to have me watch TV.

Just a few perception tests.

Now, sit down.

Right there.

That's it.

There's no sound. That's all right now.
Now, just concentrate on that picture.

Now, what do you see?

Just some lines.

Good heavens.

Even your eight sinus cavities are
filled with brains.

What? Oh, I said that you are getting so
smart that your sinus cavities will

soon be full of brains.

There it goes again.

Your mouth.

Those braces, what are they made of?

Silver.

Silver? Silver braces?

Eddie. Eddie, this is very important.

Don't get up. No, no, no. Don't come any
closer.

Whatever you say.

But why?

Why? Why?

Oh, well, it's my eyes. They're very
sensitive today. It's all that glare.

Okay. I thought you were going to make
fun of me. Oh, no.

No, no, no, Eddie. Not that. Not that.

Intergalactic astronomy.

Gone.

Oh, excuse me. I have news for Eddie.

Oh, son, I've just been transferred to
Washington.

We've got to move again. I'm sorry, boy.

We have to be on that plane by 8 o
'clock tonight.

Tonight? You're moving to Washington and
you're taking Eddie with you? Yes.

And just when Eddie's been making such
wonderful progress with you. I'm sorry.

Oh, look, Eddie, don't worry about
packing.

Your mother and I will tend to those
things. We'll see you.

I'm sorry, too, Uncle Martin.

Everything was... It was going so swell
at home, at school, with the other kids.

You've learned how to study, Eddie.

You want to learn.

It'll be easy from now on. Are you sure?

I won't just be dumb?

Never again, Eddie.

Never again.

I'd better help Mom and Pop back.

Of course, Eddie.

Can I see you before I go?

Oh, yes, yes. Of course.

Tim!

Tim, come out quick!

I know now what's happened to my brains.

That boy's mouth is filled with braces.

Silver braces.

What's that got to do with it? The
electrical attraction of all that silver

overloaded my synaptic microswitch near
my pituitary.

It overloaded it and allowed a high
-intensity electrical drain.

Oh, so that's how you got your brains.
Getting them back will take an enormous

amount of electrical energy, and I
haven't... I lost my brains. I can feel

electricity.

Not humorous.

Now, the Prescott sleeve at 8 p .m. for
Washington, D .C.

The formula for getting my brains back
should be very simple.

I lost them by a superior electrical
discharge.

I'll simply reverse the process. Now
let's see how much electricity I can

produce.

Ah!

Boy, is that hot.

Not nearly enough electricity to get all
my brains back.

But time is short. I'll have to try.
I'll have to find some way of getting

alone. Yeah, but what's going to happen
to him, Uncle Martin?

He's so happy now, being smart, his
mother and father are happy. He's got

friends.

I'm not heartless.

It was just a thought.

If and when I get my brains back, it
will leave a vacuum.

Now, nature abhors a vacuum.

It will fill the vacuum with knowledge.

The boy will be left with a burning
thirst for knowledge.

All right, all right. The important
thing is his attitude toward learning.

He knows he can now, and he wants to.

Okay, I said all right.

He has friends.

He's happy.

You'll still be happy when I take back
my brain.

Hello, Eddie.

May I come in?

Sure, we're packing.

at the airport picking up the ticket.
There's more stuff ready for the barrel

from here, Eddie.

Okay, Pop.

What was that?

Uh, I tripped over an extension cord.

Oh, yes, dear.

Yeah, it's a little after six.

All right.

Bye.

Eddie, you may go up and change. We have
to leave in an hour. Okay, Pop.

That boy's going to miss you. I'm sorry.
We, uh... I mean, I don't have very

much time, so if you'll, uh... Well,
please tell the boy goodbye. Sure.

And would you write me and let me know
how he's getting on? Certainly,

certainly. Thank you.

Goodbye. Bye.

Any luck?

No. Tim, there's only one way to get my
brains back. I'll have to do it with my

spaceship. I'll need two clouds, one
negative and one positive.

With the boy in the negative cloud and
me in the positive cloud, I can use the

full polarization power of my spaceship
as a magnet and pull my brains back.

Come on!

You've got one chance.

But I wonder what the noise will be like
when my brains leave Eddie's head and

that vacuum suddenly develops in there.

Eight, seven, six, five, four, three,
two, one.

Celestial navigation?

Check.

Martian ecology?

Check.

Plane geometry?

Check.

Intergalactic navigation?

Check.

Well, Captain Prescott says that he and
Eddie are comfortably settled at his new

base and that everything is going fine
with the boy. Does he have anything to

say about the great brain, Robert?

Oh, the captain says he is a bit
disappointed over Eddie not being as

knowledgeable as he was here with us.

But he seems to be making things up with
his great thirst for higher learning.

Well, as I once said to William
Shakespeare, Thus have I politically

reign, and it is my hope to end
successfully.

Go to, go to. All's well that ends well.
Hey, look, it's from the telephone

company. They, uh, they sent back that
dime I lost in the telephone booth last

week.

Put that thing away. It's a dime. It's
silver.

To be or not to be, that is the
question.

Oh, well, I guess your brain stealing a
little bit of my Shakespeare knowledge

can't hurt anything.

So by opposing, end them.

To die.

To sleep.

For just to dream.